#AND SO FATASS RICH IN JAPAN ????

[omegasweetener]

my bank account in japan after buying a fuck ton of gear and hiding 50,000 staminan x’s up kiryu’s ass :

my bank account in america after purchasing one roast beef sandwich :

[anime-dub-transcripts]

Hetalia: Axis Powers Episode #17 Transcript

This episode has the first part of "America's Storage Room Cleaning" and America trying to lose weight.

Lithuania: Mr. America. Are you trying to clean up here? I’ll do it for you.

America: Oh no, that’s all right. It’s just a little shit cleaning; I can handle it. I need to see for myself what I should get rid of.

Lithuania: As you wish, sir. ‘Kay. Some coffee? I’ll go make some.

America: Thanks, that’d be cool! Ehmmm…hmm…ehm! Well, great! I can finally clean this place out after nearly a century of collecting dust. Hm. Looking into your own past is never easy, even for me. I’ve tried to clean this place before, but it brought up so many painful memories every time I’d start to clean, I’d get lost in them.

{Caption #1: America’s Storage Room Cleaning}

{Caption #2: To be continued}

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Britain: Hey, fatass, you’ve been gorging yourself so much lately I’m worried that you’re going to kill yourself.

America: Dude, don’t be silly; I’m way too into myself to ever do something stupid like that!

Britain: Ehh, no, that’s not really what I’m saying. You know, with heart disease or by choking.

America: What?! I’m fine! Don’t worry, ‘kay?

{Caption: That night…}

America: I work out like a frickin’ champion, so I shouldn’t gain that much, right?

{Caption: But he’s dressed lightly}

America: DUUUUUDE! Sure, I ate a lot of genetically modified, hormone-rich beef, but I totally drank diet soda to balance it out!

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{Caption: French Method of Weight Loss}

America: I guess I should get an aboral or a gazelle machine or pick up a nice drug habit or get a doctor to prescribe me one; maybe France can help me out! Hey, France!

France: Hm?

America: How do you stay so sexy thin while eating whatever you want like a pig?

France: Well, that’s because I don’t sit around on my butt like you!

(Female voice: Woooooowwwww!)

{Caption: After that, France told America something bad from an educational point of view, so we’re cutting that scene out}

France: SEX IS A VALID WORKOUT!

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{Caption: Chinese Method of Weight Loss}

America: China, is it your crushing poverty that keeps you nice and thin?

China: That’s right. Hard to get fat in a famine. You could also try our traditional tea. Makes your colon slippery!

America: EHMMMMM! This stuff tastes like ink!

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{Caption: Japanese Method of Weight Loss?}

America: Wait! I should ask my good friend Japan! He kinda looks like a girl from behind! Yo! Tell me your ancient Japanese secret diet!

Japan: Well, I eat like human being instead of use food to cover feeling of emptiness.

{Caption: Shocked!}

America: HEY! THAT WAS CRUEL! Huah, using these cute little sticks makes it harder to pig out. Haha!

{Caption: After that, America diligently worked out using a strange machine he created and followed the Japanese method of weight loss}

America: Nom! Nom, nom…

Japan’s thoughts: Maybe if I feed him some bad sushi, he’ll go away.

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America: Hetalia!

{Caption: Hetalia}

Child America: No way! Is it really okay for me to have it?

Britain: Course it is. I did make it special just for you, America.

Child America: Oh, man! This is cool! Thanks, Mr. Britain, sir!

Britain: Hehehehe! Take good care of it. After all, I nearly broke my hand while I was piecing it together.

Child America: Wow!

Britain: Huh?

Child America: Now I’ve got my very own toy soldiers! Huaah! You made all their faces different!

Britain: Hmm. I painted each individual figure separately.

(Child America: Wow! Ehehe!)

America: Huah, I’ll never use these again. So I guess I’ll just throw them away. Hm? My old suit.

Teenage America: Hey, what’s with the suit? It looks expensive. Too bad I’ll never wear it.

Britain: You should. Dressing like a pauper isn’t in fashion. I refuse to be seen with you if you’re not dressed properly.

Teenage America: So what’s the matter? I think the way I dress is perfectly acceptable. Ehmm…

Britain: See? Dressed like that, it’s hard to believe you’re the same person.

Teenage America: Sure…but this isn’t comfortable. I guess I’ll just wear it on special occasions then.

America: Heum. I’ll never wear this again. I should throw it out too. Boy, going through all this old stuff sure could get me depressed. Isn’t there anything worth saving? Hm. Here’s something good. It’s old, but this thing saved my butt. I’ll keep this. Ahuh? That scratch…hm. That one time. It has to be.

{Caption #1: America’s Storage Room Cleaning}

{Caption #2: Continued Next Episode…}

[yzzy-gggg]

I've Been Tagged

Tagged by: @active-mind-15 Rules: Make them up as you go??? 1) What’s your favourite animal? Crap, I’m torn. I have an obsession for goats but I also have an obsession for dogs… But if I absolutely need to pick one it’ll have to be dogs. I’ve always wanted one since I was a kid and I squeal every time I see them on the streets. I personally love corgis but yes, dogs are my fave. 2) Do you watch YouTube or Netflix more? Lol I don’t have a Netflix so it’s obviously YouTube. Plus YouTube’s got the weird videos I love stumbling upon. 3) Do you like horror movies? Nope. Lol not at all. I absolutely hate anything that deals with horror. Horror movies, stories, rumors, anything. I cannot handle it. 4) Which fictional character is your favourite and/or which one do you relate to the most? Akashi Seijuro is hands down my favorite and will always be my favorite. I love that boy with all my heart that if he popped out of my screen I would not hesitate to marry him on the spot. While some may have been afraid of him or on the fence about him in the beginning of KnB, I have been in love since the start lol. I have a thing for redheaded anime boys but he just takes it all home. As for the character I relate to the most, I want to say Hinata Shoyo. One, I’m basically as small or smaller than him, and two, I always get teased about it like he does lol. I also play tennis ans like volleyball, the taller you are, the more of an advantage you have. So someone who’s as tiny as me has to work twice as hard to keep up with them, just like Hinata. 5) When you dream, do people you know show up in those dreams? Always. In fact, anytime I do dream someone I know shows up almost every single time. 6) Do you like taking baths? Actually, not really lol. I just don’t like sitting butt naked lol. 7) Milkshakes or Ice cream? Ice cream. I like milk shakes, but it’s so annoying having to wait a bit for it to melt before it can go through the straw lol. Ice cream’s easier it’s just scoop and eat. 8) Favourite food? OH BOY THIS IS TOUGH. Can I just say anything, and I mean ANYTHING Japanese. I love love love Japanese food. Absolutely beautiful in flavor and texture. If I have to choose one dish, then it’s going to have to be ramen. But not just any ramen. Hands down my favorite is the ramen from the restaurant called Ichiran. I had it in Shibuya when I was in Japan and it was honestly the best ramen I’ve ever had. I miss it so much. 9) Do you have/want tatoos? And what was your first/what do you want to get first? I have no tattoos and I don’t really want any lol. I don’t like the fact that it’ll probably hurt to get one, so I’d just avoid the whole thing altogether. 10) If could have any superpower, what would it be? I’m going to have to go with Telekinesis. Reading people’s minds and using your mind to control objects and stuff seems so cool. Telepathy is cool too, and I’m kinda convinced that comes with Telekinesis? What do I get with Telekinesis lol? 11) If you were given the opportunity to go to space, would you? If it’s just go up to see the earth then back, yes. If not, then nah lmao. 12) Happiest memory? The entire week I was in Japan lol. I fucking love that place and I’ve never been so happy when I was there. I fell in love with Tokyo and Japan and I just want to go back as soon as possible. 13) Favourite song? I really don’t have one right now oops. But whenever “Despacito” comes on the radio I blast that cuz I love the tune lol. I’m a basic American. 14) Favourite scent? The smell of food cooking because I’m a self proclaimed foodie and just such a fatass for food lol I love food. 15) If you could have any animal on the planet as a pet, what would you choose? A fucking corgi puppy cuz I’ve been asking for a dog ever since I was five lol. I’ve been waiting for years, might as well get it as a pet before moving on to other animals. 16) Favourite feature about yourself? My hair, probably. According to my friends, it looks good both long and short. And it’s always so soft and silky and it’s naturally straight. And it blocks one of my eyebrows when I let it down so if I screw up no one sees it lol. 17) Have you been to a concert, if so which one? If not, which would you like to see? AHA YES. I’ve seen Bruno Mars, B.A.P., VIXX (SCREAMS CUZ THEY’RE MY FAVE KPOP GROUP) and BTS. So American, KPOP, KPOP, KPOP. My friends are trying to get me to go to Lollapalooza this year but idk 18) Favorite fruit? Strawberries. As long as they’re actually sweet cuz they taste good with chocolate, whipped cream or just by themselves. 19) Favourite colour? Damn this is another hard one. I really am loving pastel pink lately since it’s such a nice color to wear, but as an all time fave it’s going to have to be white. White means purity and cleanliness and it’s always beautiful as a dress. And white goes with basically everything, so from a fashion stand point it’s a must. Not to mention my wardrobe has a lot of white sooo… 20) What do you like to do to relax? I usually just sit back and watch anime or read fanfics or manga lol. I also write fanfics, but I’ve had a 3-month long writer’s block so clearly we can all see how that’s going. Playing tennis can also be a good stress reliever and since I’m playing it in college, it served as both practice and relieving me of stress. 21) Do you like anime? Anime is all I ever watch so uhh… Yes I fucking love anime. I can honestly only cry from anime. Anything on T.V. or in the movies I can’t cry. But if it’s anime and it’s sad I’m sobbing like a baby, oh god. 22) Proudest moment? My proudest moment would have to be winning the championship at one of my tennis tournaments during my senior year of highschool. We were down in Springfield and my partner and I were in the doubles championship against this team. And it was so goddamn frustrating because these girls kept cheating like no fucking other because they couldn’t return the balls that hit close to the baseline, so they’d just call them out when our balls were clearly in the lines. So when we asked for a line judge, their parents started bad talking us and saying how we’re rich kids who can afford line judges, which is not true at all. None of us are rich. And it’s not difficult to ask a random dude to stand there and make sure no one’s cheating. But long story short, we won in three sets and it was so satisfying because we ended up having to deal with them ourselves and we did. Plus both my partner and I were pretty weak mentally and would get frustrated easily, so you can imagine how pissed we were. But thankfully we picked ourselves back up and bam. Won. SO YEAH THIS WAS FUN. Never been tagged. And now I think I have to tag someone else right? So I’m going to go ahead and tag my friend @thekuroiookami ^^ If you haven’t done this, then have fun~