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tenpintsof-sundrop · 6 months

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The specific Paramore lyrics are killing me. Also this cover looks so homey and domestic? Anyways text wall warning. -Rotten Anon

the reader doesn’t raise Sebastian with strict gender roles

As someone who’s technically under the non-binary umbrella: fuck yeah

reader is threatened (in a graphic way) and called whore in a derogatory manner by the UnSub

Oh fuck, actual case stuff is picking up.

They’re so cute doing makeup and stories.

There was a hopeful edge in his voice, a daring longing in his eyes as he looked at the parents helping their children from house to house.

He wanted a kid so bad.

That you thought he would make an amazing father. That you wanted it to be a ‘when’.

Fuck. They both wanted this so bad and it happened but just not in the way they thought it would.

he had even picked out which district he wanted to live in based on schools in the area and lowest crime rates.

I see what you meant by this chapter showing him being even deeper in.

He knew it was stupid, but he had already been squirreling away money for a downpayment on that house.

I see what you meant.

In his mind’s eye, his daughter was so much like you.

And as it turns out his son is so much like him.

“One nightmare! It was only one!”

This exchange is cute.

he went back into the house to be mobbed by Sebastian. Having the boy run into his arms with so much excitement - it made him feel more heroic

They’re also cute. He loves Spencer so much already.

They also had a tea party with some large bears and dolls present

Oh my god, they had a tea party.

We don’t have time to delve into gender roles and heteronormativity here, but look at Sebastian go. And it’s nice to see this in fics, I feel like it’s often not seen in fics?

Sebastian poured the imaginary tea for each member sitting around the small plastic table and they clinked their tiny plastic cups together in a toast.

This is so cute, I’m going to cry.

him downright smacking the office door

I don’t know why I’m having so many feelings about this, but I am.

Sebastian giving Spencer a piece of candy. Reader remembering what his favorite is. Oh my god. And to me, it makes sense that she remembers. Hell, it probably haunted her sometimes. But sometimes you just don’t forget things about people you loved. You just don’t.

High five!

‘I know it’s impossible, but I want those years back.’

The deep sadness lingering in Spencer’s eyes caused your stomach to clench.

Oh. Ohh. That first sentence got me. Spencer, I’m so sorry. Spencer has big brown eyes too. Fuck.

the boy went through a very detailed explanation of the plot of the films so Spencer would have an informed choice

Spencer would do the same thing. That really is his son.

“That’s my baby picture!” Sebastian said excitedly, looking over at the pictures in Spencer’s lap.

He’s adorable

“That’s when I was a baby, after I was born. I was one day old.”

Oh. I really need to think to try and articulate what I’m feeling here. Because that’s a fresh Sebastian. Most likely taken in the hospital. A moment, one of many, that Spencer wanted to be there for, would have been there for, had he known and now he’s getting this fragment of it. This little human he helped create, that’s part him and part woman that he loves that can’t even lift his own head. It hurts. It’s somehow both sharp and aching. Like gently inserting a blade into a throbbing material.

The description of these photos is going to kill me as I think of how Spencer wanted to be and would have been, if he had just known. It’s cute, but bittersweet. She did it on her own, but she didn’t have to. She didn’t want to. Not really.

“Why is my friend Spencer sad?” He asked in a small voice, looking up at you.

Oh baby.

That gutted him even more. Spence.

For some reason this one made me actually verbally go, “Ohhhh.”

you thought he was a man who would have never cared about your son. Someone who would have asked you to get an abortion or distanced himself from the pregnancy as much as possible.

Fuck. Spence. I have things I want to say, but I don’t know, and I don’t understand, but I do. He was recovering and a mess but fuck. How did we get here?

This was someone who could fit into your life, someone who could help raise your son.

And tugging right at your heart, something you wanted to deny - this was a man you wanted to be your husband, as well as the father of your child.

I would marry him.

You wanted to wipe those tears away yourself. Spencer’s keen eye went right to this movement, and you felt so caught.

There’s so much in just these two sentences. I too, would feel so very caught.

“Do you like pretending, Doctor Reid?”

Oh fuck. Oh no. Also he’s literally the dad but that’s absolutely not information we should divulge to the UnSub.

Such a funny way to talk about that whore you supposedly once loved

Weird way to talk about a woman in general, dude, but especially a woman who specifically hasn’t had sex with anyone in a long.

He’s smart enough to do well on his own now

Everything just stopped. He is smart and brilliant but he’s just a boy. He’s not even in kindergarten. And his mother loves him so much.

I’m so invested and enraptured by this I’m just taking in the information.

This day wasn’t about some soft, sappy reunion with you and his son. This day was about the fact that you had been targeted by a dangerous, deranged killer.

Hence why I said “and murderer” in my summary. Extra emphasis with the extra “and”. It also makes sense that the UnSub has been watching, he has already sent flowers. How he knows everything is another question, but we’ll find out eventually (I assume.

A fresh, vicious wave of determination went through him

He’s so hot.

This conversation about the bathroom is so domestic.

He made it a promise because he wanted to hold himself to it - he wanted to spend lots of days watching films with his son

Nothing to add, this just made me feel things.

He promised himself that there would be lots of time to do these things with Sebastian in the future because nobody would interrupt that for him.

He’s so fucking determined and also probably a little pissed. It’s so personal. And he’s desperate to not miss more, to be there, no matter what anyone says.

“Stop that.”

Denial is protection part two. Both from the horrifying reality and, if I had to guess, further interfere from Spencer from her own personal life. Sebastian is her whole world but this is something else.

The four-pointed star necklace that he had given to you on your birthday was sitting in the middle of your chest, right where it belonged, glaring at Spencer, taunting him.

Oh my god. She’s still wearing it.

A terrible guilt struck through your gut, like you had been caught stealing something, and you froze up on the spot.

I have so much to say about this. The fact this is the second time she feels caught? As if it’s a crime to still love Spencer. Like some terrible, awful secret she would be crucified for. Like an affair with someone, though the affair is simply just the two of them. It’s just the two of them. Always has been. The two of them, and their son.

You said, your voice so utterly small.

This poor lady. An attempt to scrub herself clean, like this necklace has now poisoned her clothes. Like she’s discarding the clothes she’s committed her crime in, an attempt to bury the evidence.

knowing that the only reason Spencer was there in the first place was because he believed that you were in danger.

Yet, it felt like something you had been doing all your life. It felt like just another night.

I feel a horrible sadness. Like that moment when someone finally breaks, and they let out this terrible sob. Like they just can’t do it anymore. And I feel this awful ache, akin to shallow, plastic feeling described in the previous sentence.

You abruptly cut yourself off, stopping yourself from saying ‘go with your dad’.

Oh that would have been another can of worms that would have been very ill-timed. Even if everyone knows Sebastian would have probably accepted it very easily. And the fact that Spencer caught it too.

Unconsciously, he caged you away from any potential danger with his arms around your shoulders

Maybe this is the actual breakdown moment and not the one I said two paragraphs ago.

you never would have never thought that Spencer Reid, of all people, would be such a comforting touch to you.

I don’t think I was that wrong when I said she was in denial as a way to protect herself from Spencer, even though she’s accepted him as Sebastian’s father. There’s a different between co-parenting and a single family unit.

Spencer hated that it was their only choice.

It’s not great, but there’s no time to really figure it all out is there?

So many things are picking up, including this case and I’m so interested in it. Watching with rapt attention, leaning forward. I would also like to say sometimes I think “I don’t need to add my comments that are just oh.” but then thought that you would like to know which random lines hit anyways so they’re staying. (Also if you ever quit posting fan fiction, you have to tell me so I can come off anon and request you directly end me your fics. This is is mostly a joke.)

"This cover looks so homey and domestic?"

Me: oh. .... oh no

When I was making the cover, I intended the panel on the right side to be the UnSub's stalker, voyeuristic view of the house. lmao. so this is actually kind of hilarious to me lmao

About gender roles - like I hate the idea of raising kids with strict gender roles. And it is a fact that kids don't naturally gravitate toward those things. Every single little boy I have ever known naturally wants to play with dolls and purses and dress-up clothes because they think those things are also cool. And if you have an environment with boys and girls, they will play with toys from both genders. And boys will pick out 'girls' toys' if you give them the chance. Some people make it seem cute? They'll be like 'oh, I want a boy because I want someone to fix cars with me!' - do the things you like with your kid regardless of their gender??

He did want a kid SO BAD. Like he it's just how Spencer's brain works - when he's in love with someone, he wants more of them in his life via having a kid with them. He wants to have their babies because he's so in love with them.

I want to portray Spencer having realistic mourning - because they can't go back and change it, but he can still be upset about the years he lost, especially with tangible evidence right in front of him.

The fic: “That’s my baby picture!” Sebastian said excitedly, looking over at the pictures in Spencer’s lap. You: "He’s adorable." -> Again, this is actually something inspired by my real life. My little cousin that I used to babysit was obsessed with looking at his own baby pictures. He was born in the smartphone era, so we had a lot of pictures of him on our phones, and he would love to sit and go through the baby pictures of himself. And when he was born, my hair was dyed blue, and for most of the time that he could remember, my hair was pink, so he did not recognize me in a lot of the pictures, and he straight up refused to acknowledge that I was the same person.

"Oh. I really need to think to try and articulate what I’m feeling here. Because that’s a fresh Sebastian. Most likely taken in the hospital. A moment, one of many, that Spencer wanted to be there for, would have been there for, had he known and now he’s getting this fragment of it. This little human he helped create, that’s part him and part woman that he loves that can’t even lift his own head. It hurts. It’s somehow both sharp and aching. Like gently inserting a blade into a throbbing material." -> EXACTLY. like you are so on the fucking nose with this

"The description of these photos is going to kill me as I think of how Spencer wanted to be and would have been, if he had just known. It’s cute, but bittersweet. She did it on her own, but she didn’t have to. She didn’t want to. Not really." -> your description is killing me omg. IT'S CUTE BUT BITTERSWEET. that's like exactly what I was going for. in any other context, this would be adorable, but the context makes it so hard

"Fuck. Spence. I have things I want to say, but I don’t know, and I don’t understand, but I do. He was recovering and a mess but fuck. How did we get here?" -> you talking directly TO Spencer is killing me omg

The fic: "This was someone who could fit into your life, someone who could help raise your son. And tugging right at your heart, something you wanted to deny - this was a man you wanted to be your husband, as well as the father of your child." You: "I would marry him." -> WE ALL WOULD

The fic: "Such a funny way to talk about that whore you supposedly once loved." You: "Weird way to talk about a woman in general, dude, but especially a woman who specifically hasn’t had sex with anyone in a long." -> Okay but that is one of my favourite parts of writing psychopathic characters - they have such a distorted view of the world, and they believe that they know the truth. This guy kills women, so he is gonna call her a whore no matter what. He carries the full weight of the Madonna/Whore Complex on his shoulders, and every woman is either a whore or a pure angel - or both at some point. The fact that she had sex to conceive a child in the first place means that she is a whore in his eyes.

The fic: "He’s smart enough to do well on his own now." You: "Everything just stopped. He is smart and brilliant but he’s just a boy. He’s not even in kindergarten. And his mother loves him so much." -> AGAIN this is why I love writing crazy characters. because the UnSub might not necessarily believe that Seb can genuinely do well on his own (it's part of the complex that he was abandoned when he was young, so he thinks that other children should have to suffer the same fate), but a huge part of it is taunting Spencer with the details he knows. He knows that Seb is above average intelligence, and he is taunting Spencer with that information.

The Fic: "This day wasn’t about some soft, sappy reunion with you and his son. This day was about the fact that you had been targeted by a dangerous, deranged killer." You: Hence why I said “and murderer” in my summary. Extra emphasis with the extra “and”. It also makes sense that the UnSub has been watching, he has already sent flowers. How he knows everything is another question, but we’ll find out eventually (I assume.) -> we will find out eventually how he knows all the information! it's one of those late in the game things that I want to make the audience go oooh.

The fic: He promised himself that there would be lots of time to do these things with Sebastian in the future because nobody would interrupt that for him. You: "He’s so fucking determined and also probably a little pissed. It’s so personal. And he’s desperate to not miss more, to be there, no matter what anyone says." -> also consider that Spencer being very pissed off and very protective of his new family means that he will do anything to protect them. anything

"Oh my god. She’s still wearing it." -> YES SHE'S STILL WEARING IT. It was such a last minute addition in the grand scheme of me forming the plot, but I am so glad over what it represents. I love how it's such a subtle visual queue - and it shows how she has loved him all along.

"I have so much to say about this. The fact this is the second time she feels caught? As if it’s a crime to still love Spencer. Like some terrible, awful secret she would be crucified for. Like an affair with someone, though the affair is simply just the two of them. It’s just the two of them. Always has been. The two of them, and their son." -> AN AFFAIR BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM. I LOVE THE WAY YOU DESCRIBED THAT OMG

"I feel a horrible sadness. Like that moment when someone finally breaks, and they let out this terrible sob. Like they just can’t do it anymore. And I feel this awful ache, akin to shallow, plastic feeling described in the previous sentence." -> again, your descriptions are KILLING ME

The fic: You abruptly cut yourself off, stopping yourself from saying ‘go with your dad’. You: "Oh that would have been another can of worms that would have been very ill-timed. Even if everyone knows Sebastian would have probably accepted it very easily. And the fact that Spencer caught it too." -> like if she had actually said it, it would have been everyone staring each other down like a deer in headlights, and Seb would have just been like "okay"

The fic: you never would have never thought that Spencer Reid, of all people, would be such a comforting touch to you. You: "I don’t think I was that wrong when I said she was in denial as a way to protect herself from Spencer, even though she’s accepted him as Sebastian’s father. There’s a different between co-parenting and a single family unit." -> yeah, she has accepted that Spencer will be a good father, but she hasn't yet accepted that Spencer can love her again without hurting her, so she hasn't gotten over that bump yet. but oooomf IT'S COMING

(Also if you ever quit posting fan fiction, you have to tell me so I can come off anon and request you directly send me your fics. This is mostly a joke.) -> okay SERIOUSLY I have no plans on quitting writing fanfiction anytime soon, even if it is a hard environment with AI and all the other BS. I plan to keep writing fanfiction well into my 30s and for as long as I can.

#anonymous #rotten anon #fic comments #the dad spencer fic

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gra-sonas · 4 years

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I have a really strong feeling you will like JATP. I know it's a kids show but.. give it a try

Nonnie, I love JATP, I’m actually on my third rewatch atm! 🤗

I watch and love plenty of shows, I just don’t usually blog about them here. I mean, it’s my blog and I can do with it what I want (duh :P), but it's very much an RNM blog atm, and given how much I post on average, if I’d start blogging about other shows, too... it’d be a bit much. (It’s already A LOT™ tbh 🙈)

And for the life of me, I can’t handle side blogs (I have the attention span of a tired gnat, I’d post to the wrong blog all the time). So either I smoosh everything in here, or I don’t blog about too many other things outside of RNM. I will probably blog a bit more about Superman & Lois once the show’s out (bc Hoech’s my boo and I’m ridiculously excited to have him back on my screen), but for the time being, I’ll stick to this being a “mainly RNM” blog.

Anyway, I really like JATP, and I enjoy the occasional gif set passing by on my dash. Very much looking forward to S2. Bc man, THEY CAN’T LEAVE US HANGING LIKE THAT! 👻👻👻

And while we’re at it, have you watched Ted Lasso? Have any of you? @andrea-lyn recced the show, and it’s just SOOO GOOD!!! Like JATP, it just lifts your spirits, it makes you laugh and smile and weep and it’s SO heartwarming, so kind (srsly, the kindness is killing me, it’s a balm to my very soul), it’s what I needed this year. Everyone should have a Coach Lasso in their life. ❤️

The Mandalorian probably goes without saying, right? It’s been over 24hrs and I have not recovered from the S2 finale yet. But man, I love the show so fiercely, it’s legit one of my favorite shows ever. In the next couple of days I’ll get my copy of “The Art of Star Wars: The Mandalorian”, a book with concept art and lots of behind the scenes stuff. Bc let me tell you, that’s my jaaaaam. God, I’m legit giddy just thinking about flipping through that book. I’ll probably clutch my mini replica of Mando’s helmet (yes, that’s something I own, it’s about the size of a baseball, it’s so pretty) to my chest while crying over the gorgeous art.

Another must-see from this year: The Haunting of Bly Manor. S1 (Hill House) was already SO good, but damn, Bly was even batter. I mean, any show that has Rahul Kohli with a stache (this man, I swear, I love him so much), a character like Hannah Grose (who I just love so fiercely) and the cutest lesbians (”Poppins” 🥺😭) in it will be very high on my list of SHOWS THAT I LOVE.

Oh, and a movie I just watched this week I can’t recommend highly enough: Wolfwalkers! Good lord, so, so gorgeous, and the story was just absolutely beautiful! Definitely one I’ll rewatch again and again.

Rounding this post up with a rec for another (supposed) kid’s movie I loved this year: Enola Holmes. Millie B Brown is just perfect in that role, the music is brilliant, and I’ve watched the movie at least 10 times or so bc it’s just so much fun and puts me in a good mood. :D

Ohhhh, and to make this post at least remotely about RNM: I watched Paramount’s Dashing in December yesterday, and if that one isn’t the most Malex Christmas movie! A curly haired cowboy, a dark haired love interest, a woc childhood friend (happily married tho, there’s no dumb triangle). Also both actors are gay irl (and adorable on social media), that’s also quite nice. After the disaster Happiest Season was for me personally, this was the queer Christmas rom com I needed in my life (after The Thing about Harry, another queer rom com I loved this year)!

#nonnie asks

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