#Beside of you Ea-nasir

[internets-big-dommer]

[stealthclaw1]

Silly Game Time: The world needs more giant statues. I'm talking a minimum of 100 feet (30.5 meters), and preferably more than twice that! What or who should the next one be? (Bonus points for where it should be placed.)

Alright, so, after thinking for a little bit I’m presenting you all with two options: one’s a nice, pleasantly wholesome one I thought about towards. The other one was the literal first thing that came to mind and refuses to leave in peace until I wrote it down for all to see.

Option 1) we make a nice, wholesome statue of Steve Irwin, not going crazy but we want it to be bigger than the Statue of Liberty (excluding her podium) so let’s make it an even 200ft (60.96 meters). Celebrate him for all that he did in teaching a generation to love nature and animals. Place it along the Sunshine coast in Australia, and give it a support structure underneath to support marine wildlife like reefs and other creatures.

Option 2) we make a statue of Ea-Nãsir. Now, we don’t HAVE any idea of what he looks like, but it looks like some of the internet has decided he looked along the lines of this https://preview.redd.it/anyone-want-to-rp-as-ea-nasir-v0-fdfkq7whqdsc1.jpeg?auto=webp&s=893c0b4f55ea82031acb38d37c468505b56494f3

I propose we make the statue a 1:1 lookalike of this. The size, you ask? 540 feet (164.592). This will place it 14 feet taller than NASA’s Vehicle assembly building, which stands at 526 feet (160.325).

The location, obviously, would then be one of two options: nearby the VAB itself, facing towards it.

Or, somewhere in the Kennedy Space Center Visitor Complex

This would do nothing for NASA besides make every tech-bro and billionaire in the space industry seethe that it wasn’t one of THEIR idols (or themselves) constructed to such a height.

Bonus points if we advertise that it’ll be made of pure copper, and then make it more weather-resistant stone or something

[essaytime]

Thank you so much for the links! I’m not going to answer the asks so I can keep them in my ask box but I will be checking them out when I get back from London. Also do you have any recommendations for things to see at the British Museum or London in general?

- @iron--and--blood

The last time we were in London there was really only one day for sightseeing, the rest were too busy - on top of that, we had three hours in the British Museum and the Roman section was closed due to some issue, so besides that I only have hazier and hazier memories from April last year and the other two times, when I was a child, but I'll try my best.

BRITISH MUSEUM

The Ea-Nasir tablet is, you know, itself. Iconic. You'll have to watch out for it though, it's pretty small (Room 55 or 56, I think 56) and it's just titled "Complaint about delivery of copper" or similarly. Next to it is a piece of Hammurabi Code and on its right some of the Epic of Gilgamesh.

In the same room - or the next room? - there are figures of Mesopotamian doggies and they look insanely cute, very unfitting for the very serious names they have

There's also a neat little swallow on the Egyptian section

The ever-present ghost of my dad most noble history teacher would politely encourage you to take a look at Ram in a Thicket in the Room of Our Lord 55, next to the Standard of Ur

When you exit the Egyptian section upstairs, not the Rosetta Stone one, the other one, there is some fresco (I think it was a fresco?) and it has a fantastic cat. I forgot to take a photo the last time

You can find very funny-shaped drinking cups in Ancient Greece

You are, as well, allowed to touch the copies of the reliefs on Ancient Greek section, a privilege which my friends gladly utilised to sort of immoral extents. Dignity aside, if you'd like to live your Alcibiades in a symposium dream, that's the occassion. I do wish I had the photo with it taken like I was offered to, but we had to go find the teacher. I regret. It was a fun team activity.

South and Southeast Asia is amazing, very pretty exhibits

I don't really remember the rest of the sections because I was a child then and I was very tired. This miserable occurence shall be fixed. I've heard the Enlightenment section is great.

In case you intend on buying something, the shop is most wonderful and you can find all sorts of objects in it. I bought myself a nice medieval-styled brooch, but boy, did I have a hard time choosing. Watch out for the Japanese frog pin.

EVERYTHING ELSE

I profess a great love for the National Gallery, though the last time I was there I was ten. Titian's paintings will forever remain in my heart. I suppose seeing Holbein's Ambassadors is a great experience, but frankly, I don't remember them at all from visiting. Maybe I was too little.

The Wallace Collection is so pretty! They must have closed the exhibition about dogs already, but it's very pleasant to look at. I think that's also where Fragonard's The Swing is.

Natural History Museum is undoubtedly good, though it's not really what I'm interested in, except for the animals. On top of that, the last time I've visited it I had a Zoom meeting and had to frantically hide in corners trying to be as quiet as I can and still explain my view on a Marcus Aurelius quote.

No clue what is going on at V&A right now, but they always have something good.

Never been in the Westminster Abbey, only seen it from outside - and it's already impressive. However, my history teacher says it's stunning.

Same goes for St Paul's Cathedral, only seen it from outside, but it's beautiful

Trafalgar Square is a classic for me, I love this place, and if you visit the National Gallery you're going to be there anyway. Horatio is watching.

I don't like the Thames that much, it's always so dirty, but that's where most of the famous buildings are. They're really close to each other, closer than I thought, most of them. The London landmarks are pack animals.

Watch out for the sculptures near the Parliament! I wanted to take a photo with Fawcett, but I didn't have time.

Chinatown was very fun to visit for me, but I was over the moon anyway, so I don't know how much of that was really Chinatown.

Pray think warmly of all the exhibits from me (them, not the means of obtaining them), and if you happen to see anything from the Shang dynasty, I don't know if there is, think thrice warmer:)

[witchblood-if]

Favorite knowledge of history?

Anon, I will assume you mean regular our-reality history (since you haven't specified) and it made me very happy, your ask.

The thing is I am very interested especially in cultural history of any kind. And who could blame me, we all know these funny Tumblr posts, we all know Ea-Nasir and his shitty copper. And we enjoy it immensely.

It might sound a little lame but the thing I enjoy the most about history and learning about it is: humans have always been just that. Humans.

Just recently I had to read a text passage in class from a book on the development of scripture. The passage focused on how monasteries got their hands on scripts from other monasteries to copy them from and there was this anecdote about this monk who went into this monastery to copy a book he borrowed from somewhere else but the abbot there liked the book so much that he just kept it for himself. Besides the fact that it was neither his nor the monks. And like working at a library, everyone in that work field knows and hates these people but apparently book thieves have existed since there were books to steal.

Another shorter example is that as many of you know one of the favorite phrases of aristocrats from the Baroque period was Memento Mori, right? Well, the sentiment came back with our beloved 2000s YOLO. I think it's kind of hilarious.

My point is that if we learn about people in the past and their lives we can see more similarities than most mainstream media would like us to believe. And honestly? Knowing that people had the same interactions and worries and joys and habits as we do today makes me feel a little better about myself as a person in this world. I listened to this interview a while ago about the Regency period with Ian Mortimer, the author of the "Time Traveller's Guides" series and he was like

"[W. H.] Auden said that in order to understand your own country you need to have lived in at least two others. And I thought about that. I reckon to come to terms with your own time and understand the time in which you live, you really need to have come to terms with at least two others."

And I just really love that.

Thank you for that ask, Anon. And thanks to anyone who read my ramble (can you tell just how much I love humans? How passionate I am about humanity?)

Hugs and kisses

Carter

[captaingondor]

look. look. i could try a thousand times to say this eloquently but it gets me, it gets me alright. look.

there's graffiti in the Hagia Sophia that says "Halfdan was here." he wanted us to know. he wanted to leave a mark, to say i was here, i was alive and he carved that into the stone more than a thousand years ago and more than a thousand years later we know that halfdan was there

there was a mummy in the community museum in my hometown growing up, and i was fascinated with her. i didnt want to step into a graveyard but o would stare at that mummy and think, that is a real person. she'd never know how far from home her body would be lying, how many people would come and look at her long after she was gone. she wanted to live forever.

the versions of events from antiquity that are best remembered are likely not the most accurate, but the ones that make the best stories. but would the people in them want to be remembered truthfully, or would they want to be in a good story?

and we make jokes and memes about ea-nasir but can you imagine, can you imagine going back in time and explaining to him one day his name will be known the whole world over? in places he will never hear of, by more people than he can conceive of existing? in a world that would be as incomprehensible to him as whatever world might exist millennia from now would be to me? maybe he'd hear you, and make sure to save a few more complaint tablets.

when does grave robbery become archaeology?

because i was in a little museum in France once, it had grave stones in the basement dating back to roman times. I looked at them and i thought, their families put these up to mark where their bodies lay, but now their bones are dust and the stones are here. they had faded latin inscriptions I couldn't read, but there were signs beside them so i could know their names. but it didn't matter, did it, that I couldn't read what they said, because i know, i know what they said - I was here. I was alive. Remember me, remember me, remember me.

[xanthiasonadonkey]

Father of dragons

- It. Is. Beautiful! - The labarna gasps.

- It is very gaudy. What kind of creature lays eggs like this? - his wife is less than enchanted.

 The egg glitters, and glitters, and...

The merchant smiles.  An expression to put most sharks to shame.

- A legendary one, great queen. Dragons are no mere beasts, and have little use for subtlety.

- Dragons? You mean like the creatures from those tales all of Hattusa has been talking about for decades?

A guard mutters something about bearded scribes who can't finish what they started. Another mentions a series of less-than-faithful plays by a famous troupe of performers. The merchant nods eagerly.

As if Hattusili needed more incentive to want the treasure.

- Where did you find this?

- Oh, your Sun gives his humble servant too much credit. It was not I who found the egg. But, regrettably, my supplier refuses to reveal anything besides the fact that it is a viable dragon egg.

- Viable? - at this point the Sun might as well be hissing "my preciousss" and stink like a fish.

- Father, are you not the one who demanded that all the nobles and priests proclaim that Stannis Baratheon is the rightful king of Westeros? This is Targaryen merchandise.

- Hush, Nerikkaili. The Mannis IS the one true king of that land. But a dragon is a dragon, - explains Hattusili sensibly.

There is a murmur of dissent among the nobles, and a halfhearted attempt to sing the Rains of Castamere, but that is quickly silenced.

  - What is your name, merchant? - Puduhepa asks, suppressing a smile, - is it Ea-nasir, by any chance?

- N-no, great queen. Ibbi-Adad, at your service. Whatever made you think of that name?

- Nothing in particular. You merely resemble an Ea-nasir. Do go on, my good man.

And so he does. The virtues of pet dragons are exhorted, guaranteed birth of a healthy one from this particular egg is promised. Surely a gift like this is worthy of only such an illustrious ruler as the lord of Hatti… unless, of course, it would be more appreciated in Kemet.

Wrapping the ruler of an empire around your finger? Easier than expected.

- Very well, Ibbi-Adad. Surely, you want something unusual in exchange for such a rare object. What is it?

- Oh, it is nothing much. But Your Sun's slave would be endlessly grateful if...

- What?

- You see, hatching dragon eggs involves human sacrifice, and there are certain individuals who honestly deserve to be burned. and...

The labarna has enough decency to look uneasy for a split second.

The not! Ea-nasir leand in and whispers:

- It is shiny, my lord. Look how shiny it is.

- Give me the egg, and name your victims.

The merchant does so, before promptly retreating.

The queen and the tuhkanti look at each other.

- Business rivals? Grateful customers - Nerikkaili muses.

She nods with a smile.

- But mother, why did you not do something? This is such an obvious forgery!

- Yes, but consider: more failed attempts to wake dragons from copper, less time for potentially even stranger ideas.

  Hattusili rises from the throne clutching the newly acquired ring... apple... shiny bauble close to his chest.

- Behold! The Goddess has given my Sun a weapon greater than iron and chariots! I shall rule the skies! 

- It's not even good copper, as far as I can tell, - sighs the prince.