#COLP fanfic

[estebanana-fana-blog]

La tempête parfaite

Post Season 2.  The MC, Paige Turner, is forced to do an interview of Vincent for City of Love: Paris.  She flies to his vacation home in Vermont and some bad weather hits.

Rating: T for mild kissing and references to sex.

Special thanks to @boughtmywayintopopculture being a co-writer for this piece and helping me along in both the editing and writing processes!

Paige held her eyes closed for a moment, desperately hoping she was hallucinating.  However, when she opened her eyes the slip of paper left on her desk with her latest assignment still read the same: Vincent Karm, CEO Karm International, EPD: ASAP.  Not only did they want her to do an interview with Vincent but, they had the expected publish date set to as soon as possible?!

This is ridiculous! Paige thought to herself as she balled up the paper in her hands and flung it into the waste bin.  As if working for my ex isn’t awkward enou- Paige’s eyes narrowed Raphael! He had to have something to do with this!

Shouldering her bag, Paige left her cubicle and stormed into her boss’s office.

“Where is Raphael?”  Paige demanded closing the door behind her and taking a seat.

“Well, hello to you too Ms. Turner.  Please, do sit down.  I’m fine, thanks for asking.” Her boss replied sarcastically as he tried to adjust his combover so the bald spot was concealed; he wasn’t fooling anyone.

Paige just glared at the man expectantly, waiting for him to answer her question.

With a dramatic eye roll her boss explained, “Raphael is not in the office.  He is in Italy where he will be working with the City of Love: Rome office for the next two weeks.  And yes, before you ask, he had everything to do with your latest assignment,” he held up his palm to stop her from interjecting as he continued. “Don’t blame Raphael though, it was the only way.”

“The only way what?!” Paige asked not only angry but curious now as well.

“The only way Karm would agree to an interview.  He asked for you specifically when Raphael reached out to him.  He said it was either you or no interview; he only expects the best quality writer, not some subpar newbie.  His words not mine, not that everyone here doesn’t know you are our best writer.”  He replied relaxing down in his chair and folding his hands together over his abdomen.  “Listen, Paige, Raphael wants this article.  He is the boss and what he says goes.  I got your flight all set -”

“My flight?! Why do I need a flight to do an interview in Paris?!” She interrupted, jumping out of her seat.

“Well, here is the thing.  Vincent is currently vacationing in Vermont.  He was gracious enough to start the interview this week and supply you lodging at his cabin.  Which works out great because we don’t have to worry about covering hotel expenses now.” He said as he straightened in his seat.

“Vermont?!  I have to fly all the way to America to do this interview and you think I am just going to share a room with Vincent Karm for however long this takes?!”  She spat gesturing wildly with her hands which often happened when she was upset.

“You won’t be sharing a room with him.  He rents out his cabin as a bed and breakfast when he isn’t there.  When he is, he likes his privacy and has the place to himself.  You will have your own room.  If you share a room with Vincent Karm, that is none of my business and all on you.”  He said as he started typing on his computer, clearly losing interest in this conversation.

“I cannot believe this… I’m taking the day off and going home.” Paige stated as she grabbed her bag off of the floor, turning towards the door.

“Paige, like I said before you are our best writer.  However, if you don’t plan on making this interview happen, don’t bother showing up tomorrow.”

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath as her hand hovered inches above the door handle.  Through gritted teeth she asked, “When is the flight?”

“Thursday, 8:45 am.” He answered, a certain smugness in is voice.

With that Paige opened the door and stormed out of his office going only to her desk to collect her coat, scarf, and gloves before heading towards the exit.  Before she reached the exit, she turned on her heels and walked back to her desk, reached into her waste bin and pulled out the crumpled ball she had thrown in there earlier, shoving it into her bag before heading back to her apartment.

Rain pelted the window of the plane as Paige scrolled aimlessly through her social media feed before she had to put her phone on airplane mode.  She was desperately trying to distract herself from the thought of having to spend a minimum of three days with Vincent Karm.  She didn’t hate the man, she didn’t even dislike him; he just made her feel uncomfortable.  She hated feeling awkward in her own skin.  Vincent had that effect on her, along with some other effects she’d prefer not to think about.  They definitely had a history together and Paige didn’t know what to make of it.  They worked together once.  She didn’t like to think about the events of Kat, her best friend’s, death.  But, truth be told, without Vincent’s help her killer may have never been caught.  

I shouldn’t have kissed him.  Why did I initiate that kiss… I was just caught up in the moment.  I mean, yeah, it was good.  Okay, it was a lot better than good but, still it was a mistake.  I just made everything awkward for myself.  In my defense I didn’t invite him up!  Even though I wanted to…

Paige’s internal fight was interrupted when the stewardess came to offer her a pillow and a blanket for her flight.  Her bosses may have been too cheap to get her a hotel room but at least they splurged and booked her a first class ticket.  

Paige gratefully accepted both luxuries she was offered and made herself comfortable.  She felt her eyes grow heavy, as she hardly slept due to anxiety and last minute packing.  The last thing she remembered thinking to herself before she was lulled into a dreamless sleep was, This change in timezone is going to be the death of me.

When she awoke her mouth was so dry it felt like her tongue was sandpaper.

I wonder if this is how Whiskey feels all the time, she thought idly as her mind wandered to her cat who she left in Leo’s care.

She stretched her arms above her head and rolled her head side to side hoping to alleviate the twinge she felt in her neck.

She still had 4 hours left in her flight but she was surprised by how long she was actually asleep for. She stood up to open the overhead compartment where her carry-on was stored.  She pulled out her laptop and pressed the call button before sitting back down.  Before her computer had even booted up completely, an attendant showed up. She politely asked for a bottle of water.  She drank half the bottle then she opened up the document she was working on.

By the time the plane had landed she had a basic outline for what she wanted to get out of the interview and had played roughly seven games of solitaire.  She lost every time.

She gazed up at the enormous cabin in front of her.  It looked as if it was right out of a travel magazine that featured log cabins in the woods, only double the size.  

No wonder this place can be used as a B&B when he’s not here.  It’s huge! She thought as she hitched her duffle back higher up on her shoulder.

As she walked up the driveway, a fresh layer of snow crunched beneath her boots and she heard barking coming from inside.  She felt her stomach sink as she heard the cab pull away, fighting back the urge to chase after it despite the driver’s lack of social skills and noxious B.O.  She had tried so hard to just avoid Vincent for the past couple of months but, all of that ended here as she reached the front door.  She grabbed the bronze knocker and tapped it two times on the door.  The barking, which had subsided, picked up again.  A smile played on her lips as she remembered how much Vincent adored his four-legged companion.  So much so, he had portraits of him in multiple locations.  She mentally chastised herself when she realized what she was doing.  She had been avoiding Karm for a reason.  She was here for one purpose and one purpose only: get the interview done and leave.

The door opened and she was pleasantly surprised when she saw who opened the door.  The red-haired man smiled enthusiastically at her as he gestured for her to come inside from the cold.

“Eugene!  I’m so glad to see you!” Paige expressed genuinely as she embraced Vincent’s employee.

“I was so happy to learn that you were coming!” Eugene replied clapping his hands together. “Vincent is just freshening up before dinner.  Let me show you to your room, Ms. Turner.”

“Thank you, Eugene.  I would appreciate that, it’s been a long day.” She stated as she shed off her winter coat and scarf and placed them in Eugene’s outstretched hands.

As Eugene hung up her belongings,Paige heard Esteban before she saw him slowly making his way towards her.  He gave little snorts as he tried to get to know her scent.  

“Esteban, assis.” Eugene said in a firm voice to the pug, who immediately sat down.  “ You can pet him if you’d like.  I don’t believe you’ve met Esteban before.  He is Vincent’s pride and joy.  He is also quite well behaved, when he feels like it.” The man stated with a soft laugh.

“So, you’re Esteban.” Paige said as she crouched down to the pug’s level and began to scratch behind his ears. “I’ve heard good things about you.” she told the dog as he opened his mouth allowing his tongue to hang out as he panted, clearly enjoying the attention.

After a moment of acquainting herself with the pug, she followed Eugene to her room.  The room was spacious yet cozy.  A queen sized bed with a antique looking quilt was at the center of the room.  In the corner, an arm chair was placed next to a bookshelf.

“There is no wifi here but you can plug your laptop directly into the internet via the telephone jack by the desk.  If you need assistance, I would be happy to help.”  Eugene explained.  

While inconvenient, Paige was not completely unfamiliar with the technological throwback.  She glanced at the clock;  Eugene told her to take her time making herself feel at home and he would come get her in a half hour for dinner.  Taking advantage of the time she had; Paige began to unpack.  She grabbed her laptop and placed it on the desk, letting out a relieved sigh that she remembered to pack her chargers with the correct adapters for American outlets. She just finished connecting her computer to the internet when she heard a knock at the door.

She didn’t realize that it had been a half hour already but, she figured Eugene must have finished dinner early.

“Come in Eugene!” Paige called still on her hands and knees under the desk, making sure the cable connecting her computer to the wall was secure.

She heard the door open and the sound of dress shoes on the wood floor, muffled once they reached the ornate area rug.

“Actually, I figured I would let Eugene finish up in the kitchen and that I would fetch you myself instead.”

Vincent’s voice deep and smooth was a shock when she had not been expecting it.  Paige, in her surprise, tried to stand up quickly but ended up hitting her head on the underside of the desk.

“Ouch!” Paige yelped as she held the back of her head as she got to her feet and turned to face Vincent.

“Are you okay? Would you like me to get you some ice?” Vincent asked, his eyes wide with concern.

His sincerity shocked Paige.  She figured he would laugh at her expense for being so clumsy, especially after she had denied his advances after their kiss.

“No, I’m fine.” Paige stated tersely.  “Thank you though...” she added after a minute, recognizing that she had no reason to be rude to the man.  It wasn’t his fault that she felt so awkward, after all.  

Although, it is your fault for being so damn attractive.  Must you look so good in a three piece suit?!  

“If you’re sure, Ms. Turner.” Vincent stated his eyes still searching to make sure she was in fact okay.  “Well, I wanted to welcome you and tell you to make yourself at home.  I apologize for being unavailable when you first arrived.”

“I got to meet Esteban in your absence, he’s quite adorable.”  Paige stated.

A small hint of a smile played on Vincent’s lips so briefly that Paige wasn’t entirely sure it wasn’t her mind playing tricks on her, or a side effect of bashing her head so hard.

“Thank you for saying so, Ms. Turner.  I am very fond of my canine companion.”  Vincent responded.  A smirk formed and Paige knew the smile she had caught was real.  “Dinner is ready if you are.  You must be famished after your flight.”

“I am, thank you.” She sighed at her shortness with him.  This trip was going to be very painful if she didn’t learn to get over her awkwardness with Vincent.

Thankfully dinner went by without a hitch and, despite the pounding in her head after her incident with the desk, she actually… enjoyed herself.

Vincent was unwilling to talk business at the dinner table and after dinner her jetlag was catching up with her.  The two mutually decided that they would begin getting to work the next day.

Paige had changed in to her pajamas and was about to get into her bed when she heard the soft rap of knuckles against her door.

“Yes?” She called out while she took a makeup wipe to her face.

“Is it okay if I open the door?” Vincent’s voice resonated through the door.

“Umm, just a second...” Paige answered hastily tossing the used makeup wipe in the trash and hopping into bed and pulling up the covers.  She wasn’t prepared to have Vincent Karm see her in the flannel short shorts she was wearing to bed.   “Okay, all set.” she announced as she ran her hands over her hair, rolling her eyes at herself. When did she begin to care so much about how she looked in Vincent’s presence?

The door opened barely more than a crack and Vincent stuck his head in the opening.  “I just wanted to see if you needed anything before bed.” Vincent spoke softly.

Paige was about to answer when a tan blur came hurtling onto the bed to her.  Esteban circled twice then plopped down with a grunt.  

Vincent gaped for a second at the scene that just unraveled.

“Esteban!” he chastised the dog.  “I am so very sorry!  He is never like this with anyone…” Realizing the dog was paying him no attention, he questioned whether he should enter the room and physically remove the dog.

Paige let out a soft giggle.  After the long day she had the pug’s presence was welcome.

“It’s okay, Mr. K-” Paige began but was cut off.

“Please, call me Vincent.” He stated firmly, a trace of something Paige couldn’t identify in his voice; almost sadness.

“Okay, Vincent, but you have to call me Paige then.” She replied hoping that the room was dark enough that he couldn’t see the blush rising to her cheeks.   “And If it’s okay with you, I’d actually prefer that he stay.” she continued.

She laid a hand on the sleeping pug’s back.  Having Esteban there sharing a bed with her was nice.  It helped her feel more at home, as she was used to sharing her bed with Whiskey.  

“If you insist.  Did you need anything else?” Vincent asked, still perplexed over the odd behavior of his four legged companion.

“No, I have everything that I need,” She answered while trying to stifle a yawn.  “Goodnight, Vincent” she stated signaling he was free to go and that she was ready for bed.

He gave her a quick nod and pulled the door closed until the the latch clicked.

Vincent stared at the doorknob, mentally berating himself for being so hesitant and reserved.  His confident facade had faded and he half-wondered if this was how Raphael felt all the time.  It was uncomfortable to say the least.

He requested her in hopes of finding out whether or not the tightness he experienced in his chest was still there when he saw her.  A mere thought of her made his heart jump as he recalled how challenging she had been, protective of those she loved and cared for.  

Several months and an ocean apart had done nothing for the overwhelming intensity of what he felt for the woman on the other side of the door.

Who is here to do a job.  He reminded himself.  

It broke his heart to hear her call him what everyone else did, by his surname.  She used to call him Vincent and he never once asked her to do so.  That he had to ask her, after everything they had gone through, hurt and twisted in his gut like a knife.

He had seen the faint color in her cheeks when she asked for him to call her by her first name, in turn.  He should have just suffered through the annoyance of being called Mr. Karm if it meant she was comfortable.  

He found himself envious of his own dog, both because he wished he could be so open with affection and because Esteban was the one sleeping next to her.  Keeping her warm and safe.

He suddenly found himself longing to be the one next to her.  Vincent wondered what it would be like to wake up with his arms around her, her head on his chest as she slept.  To see her face at peace, something she deserved after the past few years.

She couldn’t know what he felt for her; he couldn’t allow her to find out.  Not yet, at least.  She was here to do what Raphael asked her to do. He couldn’t scare her off by letting her know that months, even years if he counted his time in prison, had done nothing to soothe the ache in his chest that came with every thought of her.

“Goodnight, Paige.” Vincent said softly to the door before heading to his own room to get ready for bed himself.

When Paige awoke she felt surprisingly refreshed.  While she was normally an early riser, waking up well before sunrise, the time on her phone revealed that it was almost noon.   She looked down at the bed to find that Esteban was no longer with her.  Eugene or Vincent must have retrieved him earlier in the morning to let him out and give him his breakfast.

She freshened herself up and dressed before she left her room to go find Vincent.  She wanted to get on with her job.  The faster she finished her article, the faster she could leave.  Then, maybe, she could fall asleep thinking of something other than Vincent Karm in bed only a few doors down from her.

Paige found Vincent in the living room, his eyes glued to his laptop, wired much the same way as hers for internet.  He was holding what smelled like coffee, steam wafting from the ceramic mug.

“Ah, you’re finally awake.”  He glanced at her before he took a sip from his mug, eyes scanning the screen again.

“That’s twice now, that I’ve left you waiting for me while I was unconscious.” Paige said, taking the offered cup and plate of food from Eugene, who silently slipped in and out of the room with ease.  She mouthed a thank you to the manservant as he left the room.

“Yes, well, hopefully this isn’t as...traumatic as the previous time.”  He said softly; if anyone from her time in Paris was aware of her suffering from her friend’s death, it was Vincent.

“I wouldn’t call that whole night traumatic.” She replied.

She kept her gaze firmly planted on her plate of food as she realized what she just said.  She stabbed a piece of egg with more force than she expected, the metal making a sound against the porcelain.

She was afraid.  Afraid to face whatever happened between them months ago, afraid of the feelings she harbored for the man who once tried to take over Paris.  The gut wrenching frustration with herself from earlier in the week came back but she was determined to push it aside.  She was here for one thing: his side of the events of the floods.

You were supposed to get here, do the interview, and leave.  No flirting. No awkwardness. But no, you had to go and screw that up, Paige.  Damn him.  Damn him for being...attractive and caring and a hell of a good kisser beneath that devilish persona.

Paige cleared her throat after a sip of coffee; it was probably one of the best homebrews she had, second only to Kat’s.  And the food was delicious, even for simple breakfast fare.

“What time did you want to start?  Is there a place you’re most comfortable?” She asked, eyes darting up just to see Vincent’s back to her, that he had shifted to face his computer again.

Thank goodness.  That meant she had a little time to hide the creeping flush across her cheeks.

“I was actually hoping we could take a walk.  Vermont this time of year is simply beautiful.”  He stated as he closed his laptop and turned to face her.  “If that is okay with you of course.” He added and something flickered in his eyes; hope.  

She was being hard on him, she realized; it was only fair for her to concede.  Plus, he was agreeing to do this interview.  Vincent, while used to being in the limelight, remained very private.  This interview was meant to be candid; he agreed to open up, to the readers yes, but primarily to Paige.  

“Sure, that would be fine.  I’ll go put on something warmer and grab my recorder.” She told him as she turned to head to the kitchen to place her dishes in the sink.

Once she was finished changing she met Vincent by the front door.  He was throwing an emerald scarf over his dress coat.  He was dressed impeccably as always despite the fact that they were going for a walk through the snow.  Paige noticed his choice in footwear; a pair of black leather Hermès boots.  If her time with TJ had taught her anything, it had taught her just how much he probably spent on those boots.  

“All set?” She asked as she began to realize for the first time this trip they would be completely alone together.

“Ready when you are.” Vincent answered simply.

The pair exited the cabin together the snow made soft crunching noises beneath their boots.  

It was pretty mild in temperature, at least for winter in North East America.  Paige had checked the weather forecast before her plane had taken off the day before and there was talk of a storm.  With the weather as temperate as it was, it didn’t seem possible for more than a light flurry.  Paige took her recorder out and pressed the red button.  She began asking some basic questions as she would with anyone to ease them into the more in-depth material she was looking for.

She continued to ask him questions; he pointed to various parts of the property while he answered.  Paige nearly had everything she needed for now.  She would work with what she got from the interview once she got back to her room.  After that, she would figure out where the gaps where and see what she needed to add.  At that moment, only one question was left for her to ask.

“What motivated you to even help save the city?” Paige began, looking over at Vincent when she asked the question. “ You clearly were trying to push boundaries the night I was arrested, considering you basically summoned me to your cell.  What possessed you to break out of prison to help?”

He inhaled, a little sharper than he probably meant to.  “One of those answers I can’t give.”

“On the record, then.” She specified.

“I couldn’t stand the idea of some base destroyer taking the city from me, from anyone.  Paris is the city of love, of light.  Of hope.  It was, and is, a refuge for artists, for musicians, for those who felt they didn’t belong elsewhere.”

He continued his train of thought and she waited until he finished before she turned off her recorder.

“And off the record?” She asked, her heart beating in her chest like a drum.  He clearly had something to hide and she would find out what.

His adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed, hesitating in his words.  A first for Vincent Karm.

“I couldn’t stand seeing you in agony, after that night.  I told myself I would find a way to help so you would never have to feel that pain again.” He replied with nothing but sincerity.

This was not something she had either expected or prepared for.  A silence lingered between the pair as she was at a loss for how to respond to this earnest expression.  

“So, why Vermont?” She asked for the sole purpose of changing the subject and breaking the awkward silence.  

“Honestly?” He asked as she looked at him expectantly, urging him to tell her.  “I have a weakness for maple syrup.”

Shocked by the utter simplicity of his answer Paige began to laugh, trying to cover her mouth to stifle herself.

“What?” Vincent said with a grin, amused by her laughter.  It had been awhile since he had seen her so at ease and carefree.  “Nothing compares to freshly tapped maple syrup!”

“Oh, so Vincent Karm has a sweet tooth, huh?” She asked teasingly, finally managing to get her laughter under control.

“That shouldn’t surprise you, considering the company I’m currently keeping.” He replied smoothly with a small grin making eye contact with her.

Yet again, the slightly awkward tension returned.  She knew her cheeks were turning pink but, whether it was from the cold or his compliment she couldn’t be sure.

Is he flirting with me? She thought as she hoped her blush wasn’t obvious.

“You know what my favorite part of winter is?” She asked as she stopped in her tracks to stick her gloved hands in the snow.

“What?” Vincent asked in reply, eyebrows raising slightly.

“This.” She stated as she pelted him with a snowball.  

His eyes widened as he realized what had just happened, that maybe he should have seen coming.  

“Paige…” He began.

“Yes?” She replied with a laugh.

“This is war.” He stated calmly as he bent down, forming a snowball of his own.

The snowballed arched, hitting Paige square in the shoulder, causing her to squeal in surprise.  It became an all out brawl, snowballs thrown back and forth between the pair.  Vincent’s deep chuckle mixed with Paige’s girlish laughter and shrieks of delight.

Paige felt a snowball hit her on the back of her neck and icy fragments were sent down the collar of her jacket.  She yelped against the cold on her flesh.

“Oh, you’re going down, Karm!” she cried as she dashed toward him.

As she neared the man, she stepped on a patch of ice hidden under a layer of snow.  She felt herself slipping and reached out for Vincent to steady herself.  She grabbed hold of Vincent’s arm but only managed to pull him down with her.  When they fell, he took the brunt of the impact, only to have her land on him.  They both stilled for a moment, realizing just how close their faces were to each other.

Paige felt her mouth go dry as Vincent took her hand placing it over his chest.  She felt his heart beating rapidly through his jacket and coat.  Her eyes locked on his, realizing this gesture was very unvincentlike.  It was unlike him to put himself in such a vulnerable position when he was so used to being in control.

Unable to maintain eye contact, her eyes drifted down to his lips, not that that was much better.  She knew he wanted to kiss her but she couldn’t let that happen.

“I want to but… I… I can’t do this again.” her voice barely above audible.

“Kiss me or be hurt again?” he asked, his voiced pained.

What if there isn’t a difference between the two.  There wasn’t with Raphael.  Paige thought to herself.  She was both scared that they had been so close to kissing and disappointed that she couldn’t allow herself to let it happen.

“...I don’t know.  But, when I do, I’ll tell you.” She replied her voice still soft.

She shifted off him and stood, brushing excess snow off of her before offering Vincent her hand.  It was the least she could do, considering she was the reason he fell in the first place.

They made it back to the cabin cold and wet from all the snow that they threw at each other.  The heat of the indoors warmed their cold skin as they both remove their outerwear.  

Paige excused herself to her room with the excuse of wanting to get some of her ideas down while they were still fresh.  As soon as she got to her room, she turned on her computer and set herself down to write.  All she could think about was Vincent, and not the things she needed for her piece.  

Like his emerald eyes and his lips, small but soft.  Or how she had never truly seen him smile until now.  Or laugh without a darker meaning behind his words.  This was a different side of him, the man beneath the metaphors and sinister intent.  A man who owned a house in Vermont strictly because of his taste for maple syrup.

That’s why he wanted me to do this interview.  Who else but the person he helped to capture an image other than the one he’s known for?

Paige opened her work document and set about transcribing her audio files.  

Vincent watched Paige disappear into her room before noticing Esteban in an armchair, the pug watching him in turn.

“Don’t look at me like that,” Vincent muttered.  

Esteban gave a whine, his tail wagging lazily from side to side.

“She needs her space, you can cuddle with her later.”  Vincent walked over and scratched the dog behind his ear.  

His clothes still held the chill from outside but that chill had followed them inside and clung to the air.  Had he been too forward?  He knew she still hurt from Raphael, from going too fast too quickly only to find out his jealous streak ran far deeper than she originally thought.

It hurt, to hear her words.  That she would deny herself what she wanted.  What they both wanted.  But she needed to decide that for herself, in time.

He hadn’t forgotten how her light brown hair smelled, how beautiful the freckles across her nose were, or how endearing the flush across her cheeks could be.  But for her to be so close, in that moment, and not be able to…

Vincent let out a breath through his nose and cast his gaze back down the hall.  She would be busy for the rest of the day and it was probably best if he let her be.

A shower would do him good.  He needed a clearer head.  Maybe hot water would at least remove the chill he couldn’t seem to get rid of.

He left a trail of clothes behind him after he closed his bedroom door and made his way to the bathroom.  The tile was warm under his feet; heated floors were a necessity in such a climate.

He hissed when he entered the shower, finding the water to be too hot.  Or, maybe he was just too cold.

It wasn’t like him to be so...open with his intentions, at least with most people.  Then again, Paige wasn’t “most people” and she often demanded for him to be straight with her.  She did from the start.  She had earned that much from him, certainly.  

She earned my bloody heart without even trying.  Vincent thought darkly.

Vincent began washing his hair, his thoughts of earlier coming back.  She reached for him rather than flail helplessly and he hadn’t wanted her to fall; he was hoping they wouldn’t fall at all.

He expected to catch her, to hold her against him for the briefest of moments before letting her go.  He fell with her instead.  It wouldn’t do for her to hurt herself or, worse, have a concussion.  It was purely instinctive for him to hold her so he took most of the impact.  He doubted he would have done it a few years ago.  

He thought of Paige again, her laugh as she threw a snowball at him, her hazel eyes glancing down at his lips, her weight on him.  He wondered what it would be like to kiss her, to press his lips to her neck, to her warm skin, and show her that the pain she seemed to anticipate would never come.  Not if he could help it.  

He swallowed hard as he rinsed his hair.  He thought back to the night they first kissed.  She straddled him, grabbed him by his tie, and kissed him hard and long and sudden.  Very few had ever gained the upper hand with him so easily.  He was used to women throwing themselves at him but this...was something else entirely.  It was, for the first time in a long time, genuine in its passion.

Or so he hoped.

He remembered how close they were that night, how close they had been just under an hour ago.

Vincent finished the rest of his normal routine before he shut off the water and dried off.  He wrapped the towel around his waist as he went to peruse his closet for a clean set of clothes.  Once he was dressed, he returned to the living room to pick up where he left off on his emails.

Paige ate dinner quickly, barely making eye contact with anyone before dashing back into her room.  She felt awkward, watched, and she didn’t mean to be so closed off; the relationship of an interview went both ways.  But every time she even thought about approaching Vincent again, fear gripped her gut and she was left resorting to small talk and no eye contact.

The following morning, she curled up on the couch in the living room.  Esteban was on her bed down the hall last she knew, enthusiastically chewing a well-loved banana toy.  Eugene and Vincent were discussing something near the study; the conversation darted between English and French, and she distantly wondered if they did that in Paris as well.

Paige skimmed what she had so far of the interview, catching snippets about weather and generators and gasoline.  She glanced out the window to see Eugene placing several orange gasoline containers in the trunk of the black sedan warming up.  She switched to her internet browser to check the forecast; the storm had two paths, it seemed, but the pattern was unpredictable and no one wanted to make a call, it seemed.

She went back to working on the interview, forcing her eyes to focus on the screen as she heard soft footsteps pass by on the way to the kitchen.  He had paused and it took everything in her to not turn her head and look at him.  To get up from the couch and brush her lips over his, to give in to everything they both wanted.

She still didn’t have an answer for him.

The wind started to pick up just as an emergency weather alert went off on her phone.  The notification stated the storm predicted to hit tomorrow evening had gained strength and had shifted directly towards the area where they were staying.  

Paige felt nerves begin to stir in her stomach as she looked out the window realizing how little she could make out through the falling snow.  She worried about Eugene, who had left a little under an hour ago with four bright orange jugs to get gas for the generators in the event the cabin lost power.  It was getting dark and the wind was whipping the snow around creating large drifts outside of the windows in Paige’s room.  

Esteban, who was curled up at the foot of her bed for most of the afternoon had woken up from a nap.  His ears went back as he let out a few soft whines; he was clearly not a fan of the storm.

You and me both little guy. Paige thought as she rubbed the dog behind the ears and reciting calming incantations in efforts to soothe him.

The lights flickered briefly before the power went out all together.  

Paige gave a yelp in surprise as the sudden shift to darkness.  She felt Esteban shift beneath her touch.  Paige pulled her phone out of her pocket the light providing only enough illumination to see directly in front of her and nothing else.

“It’s okay Esteban.  You’re a good boy; everything is okay.” She whispered.

“Paige?”  Vincents voice echoed down the hallway.  “Are you alright?”

Vincent arrived in the doorway holding a flashlight, which was a lot more useful than her phone.

“Yes, just a little startled that’s all.  I thought the generators were supposed to kick in only a few seconds after the power went out…” She began but trailed off.

“They are.  They must have had even less gas than Eugene and I had expected.” He replied.

“Shouldn’t Eugene be back by now?  Do you think he’s stuck in the storm?” Paige felt panic rise in her gut.  She already lost someone dear to her; she couldn’t bare to see any of her other friend’s get hurt.

“I was on the phone with Eugene when the power cut out.  The storm hit town before it came here and they closed the roads.  Eugene made it to a hotel but even if the roads were open it wouldn’t be safe for him to drive.” Vincent stated in a calm voice.

“As long as Eugene is safe.  I guess the heaters won’t be working with no power, huh.”  It was more of a statement that she was hoping Vincent corrected her on rather than a question.

“No, they won’t.  But I will get a fire going in the front room and there are plenty of blankets.”

Paige gave a weak nod, wishing she wasn’t as anxious as she was.

“I’ll get the fire started.  I brought you a flashlight, would you mind bringing some blankets for us?”

“Yes, of course, I can do that.”  Paige responded, taking the flashlight Vincent held out for her.

She gathered the quilt from her bed and a few more she found in the trunk at the foot of the bed.  The case closed with a sudden thud after she pulled out the covers, startling her for a moment.  Paige carefully made her way down the hall and into the living room, arms filled with blankets and flashlight balancing precariously atop the pile.

In less than an hour, the pair was sitting in front of a fire, each wrapped in their own blanket.  Had the situation not been as stress inducing as it was, Paige actually would have enjoyed this.

Despite the warmth that the blankets and fire provided, a chill ran through Paige and she wasn’t entirely sure it was completely due to being cold.  Her involuntary shiver caught Vincent’s attention.

“Are you still cold?” Vincent asked with genuine concern.

“Only a little but the fire is very nice, it helps.” Paige stated hoping he accepted the answer without further questioning.

Vincent, who was sitting next to her, moved closer to her.  Their arms were now resting against each other.  “Is this okay?” Vincent asked gently.

Paige nodded in reply as she continued watching the fire.

“I...I’m sorry about before, by the way.  And about my behavior this whole trip.  I’ve been cold toward you and it was unnecessary.  The truth is I’m scared.  Terrified really.”

“I terrify you?” Vincent replied maintaining his calm but clearly hurt by her confession.

“No, no, you don’t terrify me!  I’m just not sure I can handle getting hurt again…When I was with Raphael…” she trailed off but Vincent let her collect herself without interupting.  When she found her words, she continued. “When I was with Raphael, I really thought I was happy...for a while.  Until I realized that I was probably the farthest thing from happy I had ever been, up until Kat died that is.”

“Paige, you’re shivering, let me get you another blanket-”  Vincent rose to grab another blanket from the pile.

“No!” She reacted, reaching out and grabbing his hand, startling the man “I’m sorry, please, don’t leave. We’ll just sit closer if that’s okay.”

Vincent sat back down and Paige shifted, instead positioning herself between his legs with her back against his chest.  She could feel the warmth emanating from his body, feel his heart beating hard against her back, and she felt his breath hitch as his arms wrapped around her waist tentatively.

“Okay?” He asked.

“Warmer already.” She replied; it was the furthest thing from a lie.  She continued now that she was warmer, “I should have listened to your warnings about him… you are the only one who ever told me the truth about Raphael.  I guess now would be a good time to say ‘I told you so’”

“Paige, I would never say that to you.  Especially over something that has so deeply affected you.” He said sternly. “And, you don’t have to apologize.  You came here to do a job and I am sorry if I complicated things for you.  I have been wanting to kiss you from the moment you arrived, and yesterday I realized I pushed the boundaries farther than I should have.”

It was at Vincent’s apology that caused her to realize Raphael was the exception, not the rule.  Yes, he hurt her, but that didn’t mean Vincent would hurt her.  She was so upset at Raphael for holding her back in their relationship and now she wanted something, wanted Vincent, and she was holding herself back.  She was no longer with Raphael; if she wanted something, she could go for it.  Should go for it.

“You have nothing to apologize for either, but, thank you.” She rotated slightly so she was sitting slightly sideways toward him, one leg bent, her knee resting near his. “I’m definitely warmer sitting like this.  But, there is one part of me that’s still cold.  My lips.  Can you help me warm them?”  

Vincent leaned in, allowing her to come in the rest of the way.  As she felt his lips against hers she knew that one night was not just a fluke.  Kissing Vincent was like no other kiss she ever experienced.  The effects of the kiss radiated throughout her entire body sending warmth to every inch of her despite how frigid the room was.  Their kisses became deeper and more desperate until they ended up in a position similar to when they fell on the ice.  Vincent allowed her to be on top of him; be in control, set the pace.  Eventually they both fell asleep, a tangle of blankets and limbs intertwined.

Paige woke up warm despite the coldness of the room.  Vincent, still asleep, was holding her close to him; keeping her warm.  The weight of his arms around her made secure, happy.  A rush of emotions engulfed her at all she had shared with Vincent last night both emotionally and physically.  Memories of the kisses they shared last night flooded back to her.  

Paige smiled, realizing she had been brave enough to follow through with all of the desires she had regarding Vincent.  Well, not all of them.  A blush spread across her cheeks thinking about the one thing they hadn’t done last night.  Neither of them had wanted to move too fast.  However, the desire was there last night and it was back again now.  Especially with her body so close to his, feeling him pressed up against her.  His morning condition was of little help, which she noticed when she shifted her thigh slightly.  She watched him as he slept.   His hair was tousled from sleep and she realized she had never seen him look more peaceful or relaxed.

The wind was still pretty strong from what she could hear and she was so nice and warm.  She closed her eyes and let herself drift back off to sleep; a pleasure she more often than not denied herself.  This morning though, wrapped in Vincent’s arms, she allowed herself this small pleasure.    

Vincent woke with a start.  It took him a moment to wake up and realize that he was finally able to do what he only was able to imagine.  He was able to wake up with Paige in his arms.  He would be lying if he hadn’t wanted this all along when he first learned City of Love: Paris wanted an interview but, after the way Paige acted after their snowball fight lead him to believe this would never happen.  He was extremely glad that he was wrong, which was a first for him.  

My God, she’s beautiful.  He thought to himself as he ever so lightly brushed a strand of her hair away from her face tucking it behind her ear.  

As much as he hated the idea, he had to disentangle himself from her and get up.  He needed to check on Esteban and see if Eugene had tried to get in contact with him at all.  Cell service was not very good; texting was possible but took awhile.  

He pressed a kiss to Paige’s forehead before peeling back the covers.  He was careful not to wake her, replacing the covers so she wouldn’t get cold.  As he went about his business, his mind kept playing last night’s events.  He was hardly complaining; in fact he wouldn’t mind a repeat incident once Paige woke up.  To hear her open up to him and realize that she trusted him enough to let herself be vulnerable with him was… everything.  

Vincent fired off a text to Eugene, hoping his message would send before his phone battery died.  He placed the phone near the window to make the best of the poor service, only made worse by the storm.

On a positive note, the wind had begun to die down.  Snow was still falling but not with the intensity as it had been throughout the night.

Vincent walked into the study and turned on his laptop.  It had been charging when the power went out; it still had a decent charge left to it and because it was wired directly to the phone jack, he still had internet access until the computer died.  The joys of archaic American technology.  He tried to check the weather but the only updates were claiming the storm was dying down.

He was startled as Paige knocked on the door frame.  She was wrapped in one of the thick fleece blankets they had slept with and she held a mug in each hand.  He could see steam rising from each.

“I put the kettle over the fire to heat the milk.  I’m sure it’s not the best quality but it’s warm.”  She said as she offered a mug of steaming hot chocolate to him.

Vincent took the mug from her and took a deep sip, savoring the warmth of the beverage.

“It’s too cold in here.  Come back in front of the fire with me?”  Paige asked a hint of shyness in her voice.  As if despite all that they shared last night there was still a part of her that was afraid he would turn her down.

Vincent shut his computer and grabbed Paige’s free hand in his bringing it up to his lips to brush light kisses over her knuckles.  Hand in hand they walked back in front of the fire and wrapped themselves in each other as they watched the snow fall outside the window.

“Beautiful.” Paige stated as she was captivated by the wintery wonderland outside.

“Yes, beautiful.” Vincent replied, looking only at Paige.

Paige turn to look at Vincent, a blush rising to her cheeks.  She opened her mouth to speak but, before she could the lights flickered on.

“The power’s on!” She squealed in excitement as she wrapped her arms around Vincent’s neck.

“And look who’s back.” Vincent stated as he held Paige with one arm the other pointing to the window.  Paige followed his arm to the view of the driveway, a black sedan visible on the crisp white snow.

Esteban barked, running in a circle before jumping onto the nearest piece of furniture to look out the window.  His tail wagged as he caught sight of Eugene getting out of the car.

Paige turned to place a kiss on Vincent’s cheek once Eugene was hidden by the trunk of the car for a moment and untangled herself from his arms, as much as she didn’t want to.  “I’m going to make breakfast, I’m sure he’s exhausted.”  

Vincent hummed an agreement and let her go, scooping up Esteban moments later.  He turned and watched Paige head into the kitchen as he scratched the pug behind his ears, a faint smile on his lips.

[jennythepenny]

So I took a draft I made on Tuesday after an English exam where I felt super pumped and read it today and literally said "Ew" out load because the beginning is so bad 😂 but around the middle and where I left it off felt ok so imma just wait for a wave of good inspiration hits me (they hit me around 11pm or 3am in past experiences) and fix all that mess and see if I can get to the end because I know what I want to do for the first chapter it's just that words... they so hard...

[d3-iseefire]

Hey, I've read all your fics and I'm out of things to read. Do you have any suggestions?

For a published book series: “Throne of Glass” by Sarah J. Maas.

I got interested in it because the description of the main character (and the picture of her on the front cover) reminded me a bit of D3 Bilba - a badass woman forced to work in the mines who’s now free and out for revenge. There’s like eight books (one is a collection of novellas that were released and another is a side story following one of the other characters). SO GOOD.

For Fanfic: I’m currently reading stories by Agent_Snark and FromTheBoundlessSea - both are FemBilbo and really good. There’s also my amazing beta Drenagon, she writes male Bilbo and mostly non-romance though her latest story was one (and then she had a romance sub-plot in another). She has an excellent Time Travel Fix It featuring Thorin going back and making better decisions. :D

From older stories I’ve read and loved -

“A Shot in the Dark” by SIlver Pup (epic Time Travel Fix It featuring Male Bilbo)

“To Find Our Long Forgotten Gold” by Wealhtheow21 - amazing series revolving around a Kili who was kidnapped by orcs as a child and enslaved, he’s later rescued by the dwarves and Bilbo and the series focuses on his slow recovery.

“Colp di fulmine” by melonbutterfly - just a super freaking cute oneshot of Thorin and a FemBilbo meeting and hitting it off.

“An Eye For Quality” by Linelen (Linelenagain) - A FemBilbo/Thorin that was my first foray into FemBilbo and the story that made me realize I freaking LOVE FemBilbo and romance and all that jazz.

“The Guardian of Erebor” by FarGreenCountrySwiftSunrise - Awesome FemBIlbo/Thorin about a FemBilbo trapped inside Erebor by Smaug who’s freed when the dwarves retake Erebor.

“Our Hobbit Lass” by Rosa_Cotton - standalone oneshots featuring FemBilbos and various members of the Company.

I know I’m missing a few because I’m a total ditz when it comes to remembering to bookmark things, which makes it frustrating to try and find them again, BUT this should be a good start! So many good stories! SO MANY! :D :D

Also, I don’t know if you like, or have even heard of, a show called “Miraculous Ladybug” but juuuuuust in case you have and enjoy it here are a few more fics from that show that are amazing! Enjoy! :)

“Murphy’s Law” by izabellwit

“All Is Calm” by mazberrypie

“All That Jazz” by midnightstarlightwrites

“Runaway” by ashesandhoney - this one is more romantic and features aged up characters which is really fun. :D

“My Last Thoughts Are Of You” by SKayLanphear

I hope you enjoy! :D

[5hfanfiction]

"What was that fic where camila was really scared of the lightning and thunder and one day Lauren came home with her and comforted her during the storm. Then they became really good friends and then they started dating. I am not talking about yellow. It was a different fic and at the end of it, all of the girls are on a trip and they fight at the beach right before it rains?? Ring a bell?!???” Yours Truly

“What's the name of the Fanfic when Camila works at a record store and Lauren has selective mutism and is buying a record from the store every day?”

“to the author of Please Notice...Please Update 🙃”

“Could you happen to direct me to the fanfic where Lauren gets Camila pregnant (G!P) and Camila moves in with L as friends but as the pregnancy goes on the end up falling in love? I have been looking for it for the longest time and would appreciate it so much if you colp me find it!! Thanks”

“From Afar's update please ! You guys must check it out if you didn't it's amazing!”

“Is there a fanfic where one of them died?”

“From afaaaaaarrr update please!”

“author of everything is a metaphor - pleaseee do one more, like what happens after the few years, preferably very fluffy”

“Touch my soul (hold it tight) - make it a miniseries please!”

[estebanana-fana-blog]

Lumière du Martin

So here is the story that @boughtmywayintopopculture​ promised!  

She was an AMAZING help and this story would definitely not be what it is without her!  Not only did she proof and edit but she was a big help in refining the idea (and adding to it since it is now double the length of the draft)! HUGE SHOUT OUT TO @boughtmywayintopopculture​!!!

Lumière du Martin

Basics - Vincent Karm x MC Pairing, Post Season 2

TW - Mentions of PTSD 

Rating - T

Her hand trembled as she held up the lantern, casting an orange glow over the skulls and stonework of the catacombs tunnel.  It was freezing down here.  A chill ran through her body despite the fact she was wearing her wool socks, scarf, and army green jacket.  She could see her breath at each exhale, the white mist twisting and turning in the lantern light, before disappearing completely.  She had only been down here for about ten minutes but her eyes were already beginning to become accustomed to the darkness.  The first time she came down here she could tolerate the hollow eye sockets perpetual staring but that time she had not been alone.

A rat ran across her foot and made her jump, her yelp echoed down the tunnel. She had dropped the lantern, thankfully the candle was tipped over but still burning.  Had it fallen just a couple of inches to the left it would have been extinguished by the puddle caused by the slow drips from the ceiling.  

You can do this.  The faster you find what you need to find the faster you can leave. Sophia kept repeating to herself over and over in her head.  Trying, and failing, to slow her rapidly beating heart.  This mantra did little to comfort her because she didn’t know what she needed to find; only that it needed to be found.  

She gritted her teeth each time the tunnel forked in front of her.  She did not know these catacombs like Tristan.  She had to rely on her intuition to decide whether she would go left or right.  There had been two occasions where the path she had chosen had lead to a dead end, quite literally in fact.  Tiny skeletons, once belonging to rats, were tucked into corners where the three walls met.  It wasn’t totally fair to say everything was dead though.  The cockroaches were very much alive, Sophia had discovered.  She made the mistake of looking up when she heard a buzzing sound.  The ceiling was much darker than the walls of the catacombs in these regions.  She attributed it to the constant moisture and condensation until she saw the ceiling begin to shift and move.  It was then that the largest cockroach she had ever seen fell, just inches from her face.  

The area where she was now almost looked familiar to her.  The candles lining the walls were closer together here as opposed to how sparse they were in other areas of the catacombs.  This must be a good sign.

She used the extra light to her advantage, trying to find anything that could be useful to her.  It was then she noticed the large shadow on the wall a few feet ahead.  As she got a closer look she realized it wasn’t a shadow, but an entrance to a small alcove in the catacomb wall.  

Sophia gasped.  Oh my God! No wonder this area looked familiar.

There, at the edge of the room, surrounded by broken skeletons, was the fountain that once held the essence.  The well that was once filled to the brim with luminous light blue liquid was now as dry as the bones surrounding it.  A few of the stones making up the sides of its basin were cracked and toppled; had she not known what this fountain once held she would not have even given it a second look.  

As much as she wished she could stay and reminisce about everything that had happened since she first learned of the essence, she realized she needed to keep on in her search.  She exited the room from the opposite side she had entered through; hoping this new tunnel would yield better results.

Sophia studied the runes carved into a cement block in the wall.  There were once words here but the constant dripping of water had, over time, eroded them away.  She brushed her fingers over the words she couldn’t make out, wishing her fingers could absorb what her eyes couldn’t, a telepathic type of braille.  Sadly, it didn’t work like that, she knew it wouldn’t.  She was a reasonable person, she didn’t even believing in magic.  It’s just the darkness playing tricks with my head.  She continued her search, still unsure of what she needed to find or where she would find it.

She stumbled, almost tripping over something.  She lowered her lantern to see what it was and wished she hadn’t.  One of the skulls had broken loose from the wall and rocked back and forth from her kick.  She looked up again, towards the end of the tunnel and saw it was brighter, the light just barely streaming down into the passageway.  She picked up her pace, carefully looking down making sure not to trip on anything else.  The last thing she needed was a broken ankle and to be stuck down here with only a lantern and a phone with no reception miles below ground.  

The light was dim but even that was too bright for her eyes at first, coming from the near darkness of the catacombs.  She was standing in the middle of a small platform in a much larger tunnel, with entrances surrounding her.  Water was flowing beneath the platform, which she realized was a tiny bridge.  

Maniacal laughter softly rang out from the tunnel behind her.  Quickly Sophia spun around holding out her lantern in front of her.  

Nothing…

There was no one there.  

Again, she heard the laughter but this time at the entrance to her right.  She turned but once again she was met with silence and empty space.  She knew that laugh, she just couldn’t place it.  It was a woman’s laugh despite its deep tone.  She heard it again as if it was right beside her but she knew when she turned her head, no one would be there.  

She knew that laugh...

The lights cut off and she was sent into complete darkness.  It was so sudden it felt like she was falling and she crouched down, hoping to ground her senses. The laughter now surrounded her and she remembered who it belonged to.  

Alia.  

This made no sense.  Alia was in prison, Hugo would have notified her immediately if she was release, or if she had escaped for that matter.  

She was still crouched to the ground when she heard the undeniable sound of rushing water.  

No, no, no, not again this can not be happening again!  she thought in a panic.  

She felt her chest tighten in anxiety; her breaths were short and fast and she knew if she didn’t control it, she would begin to hyperventilate.  She felt the cold water at her knees.  The room was flooding fast.  

She needed to do something.  

She saw a higher platform in the far left corner of the room.  If she could just climb up there, it would give her a few extra moments to keep her lantern dry. She gently threw the lantern up on the ledge and heaved herself up.  She looked along the walls for any indication of a way out.  

Why did I come down here alone?! She mentally asked herself

“But you aren’t alone,” said a voice from the water below.

Sophia was terrified.  She hadn’t said anything out loud.  She had said that in her head.  She looked down and her breath caught in her throat at the sight.

“Kat?” she asked in a scared whispered.

Only Kat’s head, neck, and shoulders were visible, barely, in the darkness as she treaded water.  This made no sense.  How could Kat be here?  Kat was dead, yet here she was.

Kat smiled maliciously at Sophia, reached out her deathly pale hand and grabbed Sophia’s ankle, pulling her into the water.  Water gushed through her nose and mouth as she went under before fighting and breaking the surface, gasping for air.

Sophia struggled to get her leg free, tears were flowing from her eyes and mixed with the water that was surrounding her.  She thrashed and she couldn’t take it anymore.  

She screamed.

Sophia jolted upright, taking a moment to realize it was only a dream.  A horrible, horrible, dream.  She felt a hand on her shoulder and screamed again, not realizing the hand was warm and larger than Kat’s cold, clammy touch.

“Sophia, come here.”  His voice was smooth and even, despite just waking up.

Sophia laid back down and curled into Vincent’s chest and let herself cry.  He held her tight as her body shook with sobs.  He stroked her hair and rubbed her back until she pulled away.

“I’m sorry that I woke you,” she tried to verbalize through hiccoughing sobs.     

“Sophia, you have no reason to apologize.” The way he said her name...she knew it broke him to see her like this.

She didn’t know how to respond to him.  She hated that she kept having these dreams.  She had hoped, since Marion was charged with Kat’s murder and Alia was caught, they would have subsided.  

If anything, they had gotten worse.  

They were part of the reason she found herself so often staying with Vincent, though not the only reason.  Their relationship was a sudden development but not one either of them shied away from.  

As bad as she felt every time she woke him up in the middle of the night, it was a comfort to know he was there when she woke up scared and disoriented, knowing he would hold her like he just did.  She hated relying on him for comfort at night.  She was an adult, she shouldn’t be afraid of the dark; but it was hard when the monsters you dream about were real.

After one of her night terrors, Vincent had gently suggested she talk about the dreams she was having with a professional.  At first she was startled by the idea.  Just because she was having bad dreams didn’t mean she need to see a therapist; things would sort themselves out in their own time.  The dreams didn’t stop though, and they weren’t only hurting her; she could see the pain on Vincent’s face every time she would wake up screaming knowing there wasn’t anything he could do to stop it.  

She knew he would go to the ends of the world to protect her but, the one person he couldn’t protect her from was herself.  

It hurt her to know she was hurting him with something she couldn’t control. Whatever was between them now, she had never felt it for anyone else before. In him, she saw all of the possibilities she always wanted in life, in a partner. Sophia had loved others before, of course, but not like this, not like him.

She wanted this to work.

She realized he was right with his suggestion; she wanted this to stop, needed this to stop.  She realized if she wanted to get better, she needed help.  And there was nothing wrong with asking for said help.

About a week after Sophia made her realization, she had her first appointment with Dr. Lugo, although he insisted she call him Adrian.  It took awhile to warm up to the doctor despite his kind eyes and constant offers for tea during their sessions.  For someone who made a career out of words as a journalist, words were not on her side during her sessions.

Sharing her deepest fears and deepest pains with a stranger was not something that came easily; she hardly talked to the ones closest to her about these issues.  Eventually she warmed up to Dr. Lugo and realized that unless she put in the effort nothing was going to change.  Sometimes she would leave feeling better, like a weight had been lifted from her, and other times she came out withdrawn and exhausted.  On those days, she saw the pain in Vincent’s face, he masked it smoothly, but she knew him well enough to see.  It was etched in the crease of his brows and the tender touches he would place on her shoulder or back when he knew she was struggling.  It was as if he knew anything more than the lightest of touches would cause her to crumble.

The sessions were helping though.  Dr. Lugo taught her a few “tricks” to help her to bring herself out of her lows after intensive sessions.  She also began learning to open up more, not only to the doctor, but to Vincent and her other friends.  She found opening up to Vincent to be less challenging than she expected; in fact, she quite enjoyed talking to him.  He, in turn, opened up to her.

She finally realized how much he truly understood what she was going through.  He told her about his friend Paul, who had been killed in a car accident.  He told her about the disorientation when he realized he was suspended upside down in the car, hanging on only by his seatbelt, the panic and fear he felt when he heard Raphael alternating between yelling Vincent and Paul’s names, and the deep sinking feeling when he saw his best friend bloodied and not breathing.

“When I said i knew your pain, I meant every aspect of it,” he said afterwards, his voice slightly hoarse with emotions he had long since processed and dealt with.

Hearing the emotion in his voice and seeing the sadness behind his eyes filled her with an intense desire to hold him close to her.

The dreams began to ease and it was very rare for her to wake up in the middle of the night afraid anymore.  Despite this, she still stayed over Vincent’s frequently; she had grown accustomed to him sleeping beside her.  It felt strange to be in her own bed on the occasions she couldn’t stay with him.  The other side was cold and empty and made her miss the way their legs tangled together under the covers.

One night after drifting off to sleep, she found herself back in the catacombs. She didn’t have a lantern with her this time; she didn’t need it.  The tunnels were dim but they were considerably brighter than last time.  Making her way through the maze of tunnels, she realized she knew where she was going, as if on autopilot.  She saw the shadow on the wall, the entrance to the alcove of the essence fountain.  The fountain was full of shimmery, luminous liquid.  Sophia stepped closer and looked down in the glow; it was unmistakably the essence.

“Funny, how everything ends up beneath the earth.” Kat said, her words echoing down the tunnel of skulls and bones, truly the words of the dead.

Sophia turned to see Kat standing only a few feet to her left.  She was startled at first but then Kat smiled sweetly at her and extended her hand to lace her fingers through Sophia’s.

“He’s...different than I thought he was when you first met him.”  Kat said, her large brown eyes glued to the essence.  It took Sophia a moment to understand who her best friend was referring to; Kat was talking about Vincent.  “He cares for you, you know.  And you have to let him.  I know you, Sophia, you are...were” she began trying to figure out which word was more accurate but waved it off and continued “my best friend.  You’re headstrong and brave and sometimes a bit too impulsive for your own good.  You don’t need anyone to care for you but he does…” she trailed off.

Sophia knew what Kat was saying was true; she knew Vincent cared for her.  It was evident in everything he did for her and she felt the same way about him.

And she cared for him too.  In a way she never thought possible to care about anyone before.  This...this love was different.  It was all-consuming; not obsessively so, but in the way that ignited her soul, her very person, every time he walked into the room.  Even on her low days, on the days where her sessions dug at her and left her in a fog, everything seemed a little brighter when he was near.

“Sophia, I can tell you for a fact, the time you get with the people you care for is not nearly enough.”  Kat broke Sophia’s train of thought, her gaze serious.  “You need to tell him how you feel because you never know when you will miss your chance.  You’ll never be one-hundred percent ready for anything and waiting until a perfect moment...it could mean never reaching it.  I learned that the hard way.” Kat stated with conviction.

Staring into the well, Sophia felt her eyes fill with tears, understanding that her friend had been taken from life way too early.  When she looked up again, Kat was gone and her hand, without her even realizing, was empty.

It was at that moment she woke up and felt Vincent put his hand on her shoulder.

It didn’t frighten her this time; she welcomed his touch.  The skin on her shoulder warmed under his hand.  She saw the questioning in his eyes, trying to determine what she had just come out of.

“I’m okay,” she told him sleepily before he even had time to ask.

This time, she was okay.  She realized the techniques Dr. Lugo had taught her and opening up had a very positive effect on her.  The juxtaposition of this dream and her last involving Kat made this evident.  Kat, just a few moments ago, was not trying to drown her in dark water but brought her to the luminescent essence.  Kat was telling Sophia it was safe to have the feelings she held for Vincent and she didn’t, and shouldn’t, keep them to herself.  She knew Kat wasn’t trying to speak to her from “the great beyond”; her dream was solely her mind trying to convey to her the desires she was denying herself. There had been many times Sophia had wanted to tell Vincent just how strongly she felt for him but, she always held herself back.  She realized she needed to be brave if she wanted to open herself up completely.  

She was ready to be brave, as ready as she ever could be.   

Sophia opened her eyes that morning, waking before him, for once.  It was early, the sun barely beginning to show itself over the horizon of the city.  She had a hazy memory of a dream from the previous night, of Kat and the fountain, and of her and Vincent barely making it to the bed in exhaustion.  She turned carefully, watching him sleep, his arm fitting right under the crook of her neck. This was the only time he ever looked truly relaxed, she realized, seeing no crease of tension between his brows, no slight clenching of his jaw when he was dealing with negotiations.

He slowly blinked awake when she shifted closer to him and slipped an ankle over his, pressing herself against him.  He kissed her forehead and murmured a good morning before he looked at her face for signs of distress.  

“You’re thinking,” he said, turning to face her on his side, their faces a few inches apart.  

Sophia nodded slowly, pondering her words for a moment.  Words she had held back for months, words she was certain of a long time ago and denied to herself.  She had nothing poetic in mind, nothing long and romantic and contemplative.  Just her feelings.

She looked into his green eyes, her gaze steady as she swallowed.  

“Vincent, I...I love you” she whispered softly.  

She was shocked she actually said those words to him, beyond a doubt they were true.  She was relieved; she had finally confessed her feelings for him. Sophia waited for a moment, searching his eyes for something, anything, her heart deep in her throat and pounding madly until she saw a gentle smile break out across his lips.

He kissed her on the lips, not forcefully but not quite gently either.  It was passionate, caring, conveying so many things at once she wasn’t quite sure where to begin and it made her head spin a little.  

“I love you, Sophia, very much.” He answered, his voice heavy with emotion, his usual mask gone in the half-consciousness of early morning somnolence.

Sophia released a breath she didn’t know she was holding, Vincent’s words ringing in her ears.  She was already relieved to simply say the three words constantly at the tip of her tongue, but to have them returned?  Returned, not out of reflex, but deep emotion, with a gravity that the words alone never quite captured.

He pulled her closer to him as he shifted onto his back, her head resting comfortably on his chest.  Their breaths slowed as they both fell back asleep, held in each other's arms.