#Calgary Flames fic

[swissboyhisch]

My Jersey

Pairing: Nikita Zadorov x Reader

Summary: After a little rain comes sun... And thunder. Thunder in the form of a six foot five Russian defenseman.

Word Count: 1389

Warnings: Shitty Bruins fans, harassment, some puck bunny comments, borderline sexual harassment, but also hinted sexual stuff at the end!

A/N: I love Zadorov and there is NOTHING on him anywhere. He's so cute as well. Easily the best dressed player in the league. Have you seen him in those suits... WOW. If anyone has any fic recs for him... PLEASE SEND THEM TO ME! Or even just to talk about him, feel free to send in something or message me. I'm always happy to discuss him.

THE MASTERLIST JOIN THE TAGLIST HOCKEY DISCORD

You, adorning your Zadorov jersey, shuffled along the rows of the Saddledome. You had a glass ticket that was next to the penalty box for the Flames. But for now, it was time to watch their warm-ups like many of the other fans. Around you was a large group of older Boston Bruins fans already in their seats. The way they were eyeing you made you nervous. The Flames players skated out for warm-ups skating past where she now stood. 

“What are you? Some kinda puck bunny?” Someone questioned from behind you. At first, you weren’t paying attention, but a tug on the back of your jersey pulled your eyes away from warm-ups. “Hey Zadorov slut.”

You turned to them after them tugging hard enough to cause you to stumble back into the seat behind you. “I’m just a fan, can you please stop?”

“What’s the accent, huh, sweetheart?” One of the other older guys questioned. 

“Leave me alone please.”

The grey-haired guy wouldn’t let go of the sleeve of your jersey. Even though you struggled and pulled. The last thing you wanted to do was ruin the brand new Zadorov jersey. No-one around them was coming to your aid. You looked around, hoping someone would help you cause it was like he wasn’t stopping. A loud sound from behind you startled them. The guys doing the harassing looked past you. You turned to see the 6’5” Nikita Zadorov standing against the glass glaring at the group. 

“Don’t touch her,” He shouted, slamming his fist against the glass.

They seemed to listen to the Flames defensemen because they didn’t speak to you for the rest of the warmups. At the end of the 15 minutes, Zadorov came over with a puck in his glove. He smiled and pointed to you. He chucked it over the glass. You flipped the cold puck over in your hand, the Flames logo staring up at you. The kids nearby got excited but were sad when you caught the puck. One thing you hated was seeing the sad kids and there was one girl that stood in front of you that was also wearing a Zadorov jersey. 

“Here you go sweetheart,” You smiled, passing her the puck. 

The young girl got so excited jumping up and down and holding it out to show her parents standing nearby. You smiled and laughed as the kids were all bouncing at seeing a Flames puck up close. By the time you looked up from the kids, the team had skated off the ice and back to the changerooms. 

“Thank you for that,” A woman’s voice spoke up.

You smiled at the girl’s mother. “It’s all good.”

Everyone started moving to their seats after warm-ups ended. After buying a coke from one of the food stands, you moved to the opposite side of the arena and found your glass seat. Right next to the penalty box. You watched on as the stadium filled with fans becoming the ‘Sea of Red’. Something that was exciting to witness for yourself. It wasn’t long before the teams returned to the ice ready for puck drop. You were ready to watch the Flames win.

Marchand knocked into Markstrom making the ref call goalie interference. But that wasn’t enough. You watched as Zadorov skated to drop the gloves with Marchand. 6’5” vs 5’9”. Not exactly fair but that didn’t matter to a defensemen protecting his team. He screamed something in the Bruin rat’s face as he shoved him away from the crease.

“Get him!” the guy beside you shouted.

The ref stopped and sent them both to the sin bin. You watched as Zadorov skated to the one right beside you. He was pissed off and helmetless from the fight. He looked… sweaty. And sexy. He caught your eye and smirked at you. Whether he remembered you from before the game or not didn’t matter.

Calgary came onto the ice, waving thank you to the fans still in the crowd. The final score was 5 to 3 with Flames winning. Each player had something they were throwing to the fans. Some had pucks, t-shirts or hats. Many kids were back down against the glass but you just stood at your seat. Making sure to take pictures before you leave. 

Zadorov spotted you in the crowd once more. Paying no mind to the people around you. He grabbed a puck and skated across the ice. Standing before you, he held up the puck once more and made sure you knew to keep it. After you nodded he flicked it over the glass. 

You flipped the puck over in your palm again. Just like before the game. This time, on the other side of the puck, was an instagram handle. One that you didn’t recognise written in silver marker. 

“Me?”

Zadorov smirked and nodded. Tyler Toffoli bumped into him, the pair sharing a laugh. The other members of the team were heading off the ice. Zadorov sent you one more smile before the pair left the ice. You sat back down, knowing the three stars were yet to be announced. While you waited, you pulled out your phone and opened instagram. You searched the handle and a simple account popped up. A private account to be precise. As you requested to follow him, the announcers started the star presentation. Toffoli, Zadorov and Lucic were the three stars of the game which was awesome to witness. 

You followed people out of the Saddledome and continued your path down the street into the city where you occasionally went for post-game drinks. After a win like tonight, it seemed like many people had the same idea as you. You ordered your drink and found an empty table to perch yourself at. People watching was the entertainment for the night. Drunk girls dancing like nobody was watching. When in reality everyone was watching them twerk. Guys arguing over something stupid. It was like most of your solo nights out at the bar. 

“Well I didn’t think I’d see you out tonight,” A voice spoke up over the music. It was the certain Russian accent you’ve heard only in interviews.

The seat across from you was pulled out and Zadorov settled himself into it. Over the music the hollers of his already tipsy teammates could be heard. If either of you looked in the back corner of the bar, his friends were posted up. All celebrating tonight’s win against the Bruins.

“Well I decided to stop by on my way back to my place,” You respond.

Zadorov holds out his hand, “Nikita.”

You slipped your hand into his and shook it, yelling your name over the music. “So, Z…”

“A nickname already?”

“There are like 5 other Nikita’s in the NHL,” You state, “I need to differentiate them all.”

The smirk that came across the Russian’s face should have been illegal. “Yet, my name is the one on show across your back.”

“Is that how it’s gonna be?”

Zadorov chuckled, “It’s definitely a sight for sore eyes. A sexy woman wearing your jersey… It’s something most men dream of.”

Two drinks were placed on the table between the pair of you. Both looked up to see Toffoli already retreating back to the corner. Upon closer inspection, they had gotten your order correct. Zadorov was drinking what looked like stereotypical Vodka but anything was possible. Knowing athletes, a majority don’t like to drink during the season. 

“Well…” You smirk, “I originally wanted Tkachuk’s jersey but he was traded to Florida before I could buy it. Don’t you think it would have looked good on me?”

Upon hearing your words, Zadorov slid his hand up behind your neck. Gently pulling you closer over the table so he could whisper into your ear. “How about we go back to yours and I’ll make it so the only name you say is the one across your back?”

“Hm… Try me,” I retort, sending him a sly smile.

“Let’s get going shall we.”

“Sure thing Tkachuk replacement.”

On the way out of the bar, once out of curious eyes, Zadorov pulled you close and hand settled on your ass. Giving it a squeeze. “Just you wait baby. The only thing you’ll be wearing is my jersey as I make you forget everything but my name.”

TAG LIST:

@penny4yourthoughts @mp0625 @hischierhaze @11zegras @lvrzegras @francesfarhadi @cixrosie @daisysthings

[nylwnder]

mine, yours | matthew tkachuk

gif by 9116

a/n: this is my entry to @antoineroussel ’s summer fic exchange 2k22!! this piece is for @idontgiveaflyinggrayson69 who was my lovely match!! i hope you like it nat, tried my best to make this as angsty as i could (still new to the trope), i hope you enjoy <33333 also to everyone else, this is my first non-leaf player fic so i hope you can enjoy it as well!

warnings: SMUT, fem!oc, my take on trying to make this angsty, right person/wrong time, exes to lovers, soft!matthew, mutual pinning

word count: 2.3k

“maybe we need time to figure ourselves out first?” venus said, bouncing her leg and looking at the ground. “i just know that i wanted to make sure i had everything in line so i could focus on you, focus on us.”

matthew nodded, resting his head on her shoulder. “you’re right. i need to get used to this whole nhl world, and you deserve the time of finishing school and finding your perfect internship.” she smiled at him, appreciating his understanding of her proposal.

“promise me that you won’t forget me, yeah? if life really changes when we go our own ways, and maybe you meet new people… just know that i loved you so much. and i’ll support whatever it is that you choose to do.” venus nodded as matthew spoke, her eyes getting blurred with the many tears that began to build up.

venus knew it was going to be hard to let him go. not have him even in those few minutes of free time the two of them had. though all the while she knew it was best, that a better relationship would come with time. she wanted matthew, and she hoped that even with any circumstances that would arise, she was going to do everything to have him by her side one day or another.

“i’ll say the same thing to you” she says, letting out a small laugh. he looks at her with melancholic eyes, “oh baby, i won’t forget your sweet sweet face”

—

they were phantom fingertips. ones that knew all the places, all the ways to make one crumble under their touch. they were ones that venus knew all too well, ones she pictured for all those years. the ones she ached for day by day. his soft lips, warm breath by her ear. “mine, all mine.”

she woke up, hearing that the plane would land in a few minutes. she sighed, relishing in the series of dreams she had throughout her nights. the ones she hadn’t stopped seeing since she was that 19 year old girl thinking if she made a mistake by letting him go. if maybe she needed him more than anything. if he was the only way she could function.

she’d be closer to him than ever today. closer to her fantasies when she stepped onto the ground that is calgary. she didn’t know if she should be excited or nervous. he could be far from the man she last saw. a girl already standing beside him. laughing in his ear with his arms wrapped around her tightly. she knew that they could always have started to make their own lives between the time apart.

though her thoughts were halted as the taxi dropped venus off at her parents house. a black g-wagon was parked on the driveway behind venus’ father’s car. she knew the meaning of the car to a particular someone but her mind flew past the fact that it was parked in her driveway. as she walked into her childhood home, she heard voices mingling further in.

“i’m here mom, dad!!” venus announced as she made her way to the kitchen. “my darling, you’re home!!” her mom greeted her with open arms. she smiled as her mother took in her presence. “your father is in the living room, why don’t you say hello” she says, venus nodded and made her way over. though her father swooped the girl into a hug before she’d even made it through the hall. “hello sweetie, so great to have you home now!” he says, “i’m so happy to be back! i’ve missed you both”

“why don’t you greet our guest in the living room” her father says. it wasn’t until he parted away that venus’ chocolate eyes widened at the sight of some untamed brown curls that belonged to the boy of her dreams. her heart began to race, she hadn’t seen his soft face for four years.

matthew’s eyes lit up at the sight of venus. her dark brown hair curled around her face beautifully. they both couldn’t help but smile. as he was about to greet her, before he could speak, venus couldn’t think of anything else to do but lunge in his arms. his warmth, scent, build and husky voice in her ears is what she daydreamed for years. for all one could say, it was her determination to complete her goals so she could come home to him. the one thing she was still missing.

“hi” she says, “hello love” he says, his blue eyes taking in the only person he’s had in his mind. though day after day he was still filled with doubt on whether or not she'd take any interest in him once she came home. if she’d found that perfect person for herself while matthew was away.

“matthew here was just visiting us as he usually does,” venus’ mother said, as she looked at the two of them. venus looked at matty, curious if he really made daily visits to her parents home. “but he has practice to head to, right matthew?”

“yes mrs. burkley.” he said, though he kept his eyes fixed on the girl who kept her hands tugging at his sweater. “i gotta go” he said quietly, venus nodded though didn’t make a move to back away from him. “will you still be joining us for dinner tonight?” mrs. burkley asked matty as he finally forced himself to move away from venus even though his whole body ached to hold her till he couldn’t no more. “of course,” he says, venus’ eyes bright at the proposal. “wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

—

around dinner time, matthew didn’t take long before arriving. he wore a dress shirt and some dress pants while venus decided to wear a summery-ish dress that flowed around with her every step. conversation consisted mostly of how perfectly venus’ internship - for a renowned advertising organization - was in new york. matty also shared his highlights of his career of being a professional hockey player for the flames.

though the both couldn't help but hint that everything was perfect except for a part of themselves. the part that knew not having each other made for everything not being enough to bring themselves to true satisfaction. that it wasn’t until they could lie together, legs tangled, bodies as close as humanly possible, and sharing all the sweet nothings that they longed to hear from one another. it isn’t until then, that their hearts would shine as purely, beat as naturally, as they should.

—

a few days had passed since venus’ initial arrival back home. matthew had asked her if she wished to go see one of his games. obviously saying yes maybe a bit too quick than she should’ve, matty sent her the tickets with a slight chuckle escaping his lips. she sat and watched that evening, seeing him skate as swiftly as he always did. before their time apart, she had only watched some of his rookie games when her uni schedule allowed her. though when she was away she’d taken a few nights to watch some of his games, but she had really forgotten how amazing the feeling of being in the arena with all the fans felt.

the game ended, as matthew and the flames won. she waited for him by the lockers, his teammates, old and new, greeted her with kind smiles. “glad you’ll keep him company now. he hasn’t stopped talking about you, it makes us sick.” one of them said to venus, she turned to the man before he walked away.

“wait, do you mean he doesn't have a girlfriend? like at all?” venus asked. even if early this morning she was looking back at all the signs of any possible care matty still has for her, her doubt couldn’t help but stick in her head and distort her thoughts. she wanted nothing more than to find out the truth, “i haven’t seen him even look in a girls direction.” he laughed a bit in which she smiled back.

“venus! how’d you like the game?” matty asked as he jogged to her. she smiled, “so fucking cool!! forgot how much i missed seeing a live game.” he grinned before taking her to his car in the large parking garage. “i have something planned out at my place, if you wanna come over?” matthew asked, fiddling on the steering wheel as they headed out to the nighttime streets of downtown calgary. “sure, i’d love that”

the ride wasn’t too long to matty’s place. venus took her time admiring the feel of exploring the semi empty streets of this beautiful city. the way she used to skip through the puddles of the spring rain and laugh with matthew by her side. snacking on something so mediocre that the two of them just couldn’t help it. matty could see her smile as she drifted through her thoughts, it couldn't help but make him all warm inside. but he thought about who it was that she was dreaming of? if it was the man who’s waiting for her back in new york?

they made their way inside matty’s place, where candles and a pre-prepared meal sat waiting for them. her heart fluttered at the scene in front of her, matthew taking off his suit jacket and venus’ sweater while she stood looking at every itty bitty detail. she spinned around to him as he threw them aside. her eyes skipped from matthew’s eyes to his lips and it took all her confidence to make their lips meet.

after kiss and kiss and kiss, matty didn’t think much before he scooped venus up and made their way to his room. he placed her gently on the bed, her fingers tied in his curls. he chased for her lips as she fell back on the comfy mattress, his hands holding her sides.

“w-wait, venus” matthew spoke, breaking the blissful link of their lips. venus gave a soft whine but she looked into his sad eyes and composed herself from matthew’s toe-curling kisses. “yeah?” she asked, he looked down from her now worried face. she became concerned if she did something wrong, if there really was anything holding them back from being with each other.

“nick. your mother said you’re dating a man named nick back in new york. are you really?” he asked quietly. venus snickered, “my mother never pays attention, does she?” matthew furrowed his brows. “nick? yeah just a guy from my internship who asked me out on one date. just one.”

“you don’t want to go out on more?” matthew asked, pushing a possibility that venus never paid mind to. “matty, i couldn’t feel a single thing for any of them. for anyone who tried to spark a conversation.” matty nodded, surely knowing the feeling, “and- a part of me never wanted to. i kept having this fantasy that when i’d come home, i’d finally get what i always wanted. a particular person who so happened to make it to my parents house before me.”

he smiled, his hands softly beginning to rub her sides. “nick by the way…. well you remember that guy that tried to speak to taryn at any time he could, and brady was like millimetres away from beating him up?” venus said smiling and playing with the collar of mattys dress shirt. “yeah, at the st. patty’s party” she nodded, “yeah well,” she bounced her brows and giggled. “he looks like that? no way” he said, giggling with her. “the resemblance is uncanny. but yeah, my mother is always exaggerating everything, you should know that by now.”

matty nodded, “please she made it seem like a 2 year relationship. but a part of me really did believe it. that you really did move on from what, a childhood crush-” her hands made their way to cup matthews face, “matty i made you a promise, i wasn’t going anywhere.” venus could feel all the uncertainty and hesitation fall from his shoulders. “and i told you i was never going to forget your sweet sweet face”

she smiled, tugging at him to kiss her already. when the two of them broke the kiss for air, a smile crept up at the corners of venus’ lips. “the question is, whether we eat or well, continue in here. what do you think?” matty smirked, laying a teasing kiss on her lips, “i think we’ll work up an appetite later, no?” matty says, pulling a giggling venus up so she could straddle his lap.

“i missed you” venus spoke, letting her arms hook around the back of matty’s neck. “i missed you more, trust me”

shirts ripped off, pants unbuttoned, underwear slipped down. it took no effort to feel like the love filled kids who couldn’t keep their hands off of each other. who couldn’t mask the groans or whines from slipping past their kiss swollen lips. or couldn’t help getting their fingers tangled in each other’s hair, searching for anything to ground them from their euphoric state.

nails scratching against matthew's back, marks taking shape on each other’s neck, a trail of wet kisses leading to venus’ throbbing cunt. she could have sworn that she needed to pinch herself to see if she really was feeling his tongue this time. but now that she tugs at his curls, a tight grip of his hands keeping her thighs from squeezing around his head, she didn’t feel anything but ablaze.

there was such a hunger of having matty fill the void inside of venus. matthew couldn’t count the amount of times he would do anything to feel her wet pussy flutter around his length again. to have her leg hooked up and over his shoulder, just to hear her gasp when he pushed in for what seemed impossibly deeper.

matthew’s warm breath moved from hovering over venus’ neck to her ear. her mouth nipping at his shoulder while his hips harshly bucked into hers. “mine, all mine” he whispered, kissing her jaw.

“all yours” venus whined out, pulling him in for a kiss.

[ join my taglist if you enjoyed reading! : click here <3 ]

[thomasschabot]

hello! can i please get a cold cut combo on whole wheat w matthew tkachuk, he cheats and you find out everyone knew except you (family, teammates, wags, close friends)

so excited to get a taste of all of the sandwiches!

you got it sweet pea 😌 matty t isn’t actually in this but it’s fine because it’s about the agnst ya know?

welcome to c's deli :))

It’s a slap in the face when you find out. 

You’ve been in St. Louis for the entire offseason, landing not even two days after Matthew’s exit interview, but despite that you’ve barely seen your boyfriend’s family. It’s been a busy few months, with Matt being his extravagant self and flying you and your girlfriends somewhere tropical every few weeks for a weekend and taking frequent golfing road-trips with his father and brother. Truth be told you haven’t spent much time with Matthew, but after the troubling season he had you understand steam needed to be blown off and relaxation was at the forefront of his mind. 

After knocking twice on Emma and Brady’s door, knuckles rapping on the frosted glass panel set into dark mahogany, you twist the handle and step inside. “Hello!” you sing-song, slipping off your sandals and wandering farther into the house. 

“Babe!” the blonde squeals, wrapping her arms snugly around your midriff. “It feels like forever since I last saw you.”

In reality it’s only been a week, and during the season you go months without each other’s company, but during the summer the pair of you typically spend almost every day together. “I know,” you sigh, “But you’ve probably seen Brady even less! I can’t believe they went on another golf trip.” Your eyes roll for good measure to show that the absence of Tkachuk men in the city is getting to you a little bit. 

Emma’s head cocks to the right slightly, her brow arches, and a puzzled look crosses her features. “What do you mean? Brades’s is upstairs.”

Immediately after the words leave her mouth she goes pale but doesn’t try to correct herself. Emma’s aware of her grave mistake and flinches slightly when your face hardens. 

“How many golf trips have there actually been?” 

The sound of blood rushing through your body is all you hear, and taking her silence as an omission of guilt, you bound up the stairs two at a time and slam open the door of the gaming room you knew Brady would be in. You’re hysterical as you scream at him, asking a million questions faster than the speed of light, but the most common one is why didn’t you tell me?

Brady’s quiet, lets you scream until your lungs give out, and is smart enough to not try and console you. Despite your relatively short time on Earth you aren’t stupid — you know Matthew is a young, attractive professional athlete with a big ego and that there was always a possibility of infidelity. You just thought the people you cared about would be kind enough to tell you if it happened. 

All your questions are answered in time, including who knew (everyone) and how long (almost two years), and once the interrogation is over your bones feel heavy. You’re so angry, so full of rage it would be all-consuming if it wasn’t for the exhaustion you also feel. A line was crossed by everyone you thought loved you and there’s no doubt you’ll have to start over somewhere new. The fact that Matthew cheated and everyone helped cover it up is too much to bear, and you’re overcome immediately with the notion to get the hell out. Of Brady’s house, of St. Louis, of any place that holds memories of laughs shared with Matthew. 

Disgust is the only emotion you feel, and when you turn around to look at the couple you thought would be the maid of honour and best man at your wedding no tears fall. Instead, a scoff comes from deep within your throat before you look Emma in the eyes. 

“I wouldn’t have thought twice about telling you if it was Brady was fucking someone else and I found out about it.” Her eyes slip down to the floor, and you try desperately to twist the knife as far as you can. “Guess when it eventually happens I’ll keep my mouth shut.”

You’re gone before a response could fall upon your deaf ears, in the car and slamming it into reverse without regard to any possible oncoming traffic. You’re on the warpath, rightfully so, and all you want to do is confront Matthew. It’s a race against the clock as you’re sure Brady called him as you as you were out the door, but there’s a small part of you that believes if you drive fast enough he won’t be able to escape. 

The driveway and house are empty when you arrive, the farthest thing from a shock, but you’re so pissed off you kick your tire. Soles bounce harmlessly off the rubber, and you decide you won’t give Matthew the satisfaction of trying to make the situation better. You won’t allow him to placate you, draw you back in with infectious giggles and empty promises. No, the best thing you can do is disappear without a trace and force him to live with the fact he lost the only thing in his life that can’t be replaced. 

That’s exactly what you do, and only as you drive in the opposite direction of where home once was do you allow a tear to slip. 

place an order here x

[tkachuckycheese]

on the line - part two

read part one here!

summary: matthew shows up post-breakup, post playoff series loss at your apartment.... what will you do? 

word count: 1.1k 

warnings: EXTRA smutty lmao (use protection kids) 

note: here’s part two/continuation of my sadness about the flames getting eliminated early (yes clearly still not over it almost a month later). let me know what you think :))) 

It hits you so hard, you let out a shudder. You either have to believe him or you have to let him go. 

And the only thing that terrifies you more than forgiving him is losing him. 

So you take a ragged breath and you whisper, “Prove it.” 

His eyes meet yours as he reaches up and grabs your face again. This time, you don’t fight him. His mouth lands on yours and you slip your tongue past his beautiful lips. He holds your head with one hand, tangling his fingers in your hair and grabbing your ass with the other. He squeezes so hard it’ll leave a mark and then he bends his massive thighs, wraps his arms around your waist and lifts you up. His tongue never leaves your mouth. 

You’ve missed this–the way he dominates you. The way he manhandles you. 

You wrap your legs around his waist. He carries you into the living room, right up to the couch and then he lays you down on it. Hovering above, he reaches over his head, pulls his hoodie off and drops it to the floor as he crawls on top. You spread your legs to make room. The minute he settles down between them, he dips his hips and pushes into you. His hard-on grinds your body, rubbing your slit through your clothes. 

He pushes a hand into the couch beside your head, lifting his body up just enough to stare down at you as he snakes his hand in between you and grabs hold of the waist of your sweatpants. In one strong movement, without you even lifting a muscle, he yanks them all the way down to your knees. His eyes, narrowed, hold firmly onto yours as his hand moves to the front of your underwear and slowly shove inside. 

You’re soaking wet. He smiles and swipes his index and middle finger through the mess before pressing them in. You can’t help but arch your back in pleasure. 

“Matthew,” you accidentally whisper his name. 

“You still taste delicious?” he asks as you dig your nails into his scalp and he pulls his fingers out of you. You watch his long tongue slip from between his lips and lip the juices off his fingertips. He smiles again. “God, I missed how you taste.” 

You pull yourself up and tug his pants down over his muscular butt. He roughly pushes you back down into the couch and shoves your shirt up to your neck. You’re not wearing a bra, which is good because he probably would’ve just ripped it off. He goes right for your nipple, swirling his tongue around it twice before nipping it hard. As he moves to assault the other nipple, his hand moves into his underwear and he frees his hard, thick cock. 

Your body isn’t used to him anymore. But you want him so badly, you don’t care. He pushes into you and you make a sound you can’t even begin to decipher at that moment and fight to keep your eyes open. His eyes roll back into his head and his cheeks begin to flush. You bend your knees on either side of his hips and squeeze your pussy hard. You’re determined to make him struggle more than any fucking hockey game. 

He whimpers. Literally fucking whimpers. 

“Don’t,” he warms. “I won’t hold on.” 

You squeeze down hard again as he swings hard into your hips, his balls slapping your ass. The vein in his neck throbs and you can see the fire in his eyes. 

“Y/N. Fuck. No,” he demands. He drops his whole body onto you. It’s like being hit with a two-hundred-pound sand bag. The air whooshes out of your lungs. He curls his face into your neck, just below your ear. “Baby, please.” 

The emotion in his plea–the fact that he’s begging at all– forces the air out of your lungs again. 

“I’ve missed this. I need you. Please.” 

You relax your core and gently wrap your arms around his back. Holding him to you, you kiss his shoulder and slowly rock your hips. He exhales loudly, a mix of pleasure and relief, and matches his thrusts to your rhythm. Your eyes flutter close as you concentrate on the perfect way he fills you up. He remembers exactly how to tilt his hips, exactly where you like it. 

“Again. Harder,” you demand. 

He does it again. Harder. You can’t catch your breath. Your pussy quivers. He’s on one elbow now and his eyes are wide open. They’re filled with lust and love. That has to be love. Because you love him. 

He looks down between the two of you. “Let me make you come. Please. I want to make you…” 

He pushes his cock deep and hard into you and grinds his pelvis into your clit. Keeping himself pressed right against you, he starts hammering with short and hard thrusts. The friction is both too much and not enough. You arch your back and rub yourself into his pubic bone. Your fingers claw at his back as the orgasm ripples through you. 

“Matthew,” his name slips from your lips once again in a ragged whisper. “Oh god, yes.” 

He pushes harder until your head bumps the arm of the couch accidentally. Then he pulls himself up and with one more thrust, he swears at the top of his lungs and explodes inside of you. He seems to come forever, his body jerking and his hips twitching as he collapses on top of you. 

Half an hour passes and you don’t move. You keep your arms around his back but snake your fingers up to run them through his curls. 

“I just can’t believe I lost. I really, truly lost,” he whispers finally. 

“It’s not the end of your hockey career. You guys will win again,” you advise him. 

He lifts his head. His eyes are confused. “I wasn’t talking about hockey. I’m talking about us.” 

You take a deep breath to make room for the swell of your heart roaring back to life in your chest. 

“Concentrate on getting your team to win next year,” you tell him as you traces his lips with your finger. “Because that’s the only thing you’ve lost.” 

You reach up to pull him in for another kiss.

[ilyasorokinn]

winner, winner, chicken dinner ― matthew tkachuk

note: the win. i think i'm still on a high and they aren't even a team i'm actively rooting for. summary: pre win and post win. warnings: alcohol consumption, mild cursing word count: 741 words

matthew was getting ready in the bathroom when jamie walked in, wearing his own little suit, "what're you getting dressed up for?"

"going with you, daddy." jamie answered.

matthew smiled, picking up max and setting him on the counter, and helping him tie his tie. you walked into the bathroom, wearing your special red playoff jean jacket.

"what happened to your speical jersey?" you asked.

"didn't want to." jamie shrugged, “wanted to match with daddy,” he smiled.

“oh.” you nodded, brushing his hair.

“i need help.” olivia announced, joining you in the bathroom.

“me too.” max, ever the mama's boy, ran in after olivia and ran right into your legs.

“oof.” you grunted, “what do you need help with?”

“i can’t tie my shoes,” he admitted shyly.

“come on, let’s get shoes on you.” you smiled, picking him up and carrying him back out to his room.

“what do you need help with?” matthew asked, bending down to olivia’s height.

“mommy said she would help me with my hair.” olivia smiled.

“sadly, i can’t help you with that.”

the entire tkachuk family had flown in to see matthew play, whether that was at home or in dallas. it made life easier knowing that at any given point, all three tkachuk kids were either with their aunt, uncle or grandparents.

olivia was standing up close to the glass, trying to spot matthew. jamie was sitting in between chantel and keith while max was with you and taryn. brady was off somewhere being a menace.

"daddy!" olivia cheered, slapping her hands on the glass. that caught both max and jamie's attention and they both shot up, eyes immediately glued on the ice.

matthew skated over, a few pucks in hand and he tossed three over the glass for your three kids, then tossed a few more to a few kids around you.

he turned his attention back to the three kids in front of him and waved. he blew them all kisses and told him he loved them. he blew you a kiss and sent you a wink, then skated back, blowing kisses to the rest of his family.

the stars were up by one but you were hopeful because it was only the second period. the puck went down into flames' zone, then jacob hit it over to johnny who skated towards the net then passed it over to matthew who took his shot and made it.

the horn sounded and the crowd went wild. you were sure, out of everyone in the entire arena, that the tkachuk family was cheering the loudest.

by the end of the game, max was asleep. olivia and jamie were wide awake though, due to the giant soda uncle brady had given them halfway into the second period.

you waited for matthew to finish up media in the tunnel, "can we go find daddy?" olivia asked.

"daddy's doing interviews," you told her.

"where's that?" jamie asked.

"over there." you pointed. they looked over, then looked back over at you, silently asking to go in.

you thought about it, "i'll take them." chantel volunteered.

"don't cause too much trouble," you told them, and they instantly smiled, linking hands with their grandma and making their way into the media room.

matthew was mid-question when he heard them walk in. he instantly brightened up and motioned for them to come over. they looked over at chantel, who nodded, and they ran over, hugging their dad.

"hey, what're you guys doing here?" he laughed, kissing their heads and letting them climb into his lap.

"are you almost done?" olivia asked, causing everyone else in the room to laugh.

"yeah liv. almost done." he pressed another kiss to her head and got back to the interview.

"and one last question for olivia and jamie, are you guys excited that your dad made it to round one?"

"yeah." they both nodded.

"thanks, guys." matthew nodded, and let the kids hop off his lap and made his way out to the tunnel. he spotted the tkachuk clan almost as soon as he stepped out of the media room and made a beeline over to you, each hand linked with a child.

"there's my superstar." you grinned, leaning over the sleeping child and kissing him.

"you did great, dude." brady patted him on the back.

"can we get ice cream?" jamie asked.

"maybe tomorrow. you're a little past your bedtime." olivia and jamie pouted.

-

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[bqstqnbruin]

One in a Million

I know I said I was going to read but I had to finish this instead SO here's a fic for @antoineroussel's summer fic exchange! I will say that I did have a fight with trying to post this because all the place cards were being tedious and the first one is really uncomfortably large to me but I don't know how to fix it. The links at the end also gave me issues so let me know if can't see the dresses or anything. I wrote this for @luvsherleafs! Love ya, hope you like this!

Warnings: mentions of swearing, alcohol mentions, some bullying from other characters (they aren't important but they're mean)

Yes that is the ending

WC: 6.4K

_____________________________

Holly had her place card in one hand for her friend's wedding, knowing that she was placed at the unofficial singles table, and what was probably the largest glass of wine she had ever seen in her other. She didn’t care too much; she definitely tried to find a date to Emily’s wedding, but every friend she asked was conveniently busy that weekend: Carter was going to be in Greece visiting his family, Nate had family coming up from Florida that weekend, Grace was going to be at a wedding out in Pittsburgh, Adam was on vacation with his college friends that Holly hated, Robbie never answered her texts in the first place, and Liz had invited herself, which was enough to piss Holly off to the point where she didn’t even bother asking anyone else. Going to the wedding alone was fine.

People did that all the time, right?

Holly checked herself in the mirror of the bathroom before heading into the hotel ballroom to find her seat. The maroon dress she was wearing hugged her body well enough that she was fine wearing it tonight, but if she was being honest, she only wore it because it was the only thing she could find that she didn’t hate while she was shopping. She just needed a few drinks in her to forget that she wasn’t too fond of her outfit, and she would be fine. 

The ballroom was hectic and overwhelming, Emily’s college friends and Kevin’s family already occupying the dance floor, the music blaring and somehow still not as loud as the noise coming from the wedding guests.

Holly couldn’t help but groan, knowing that she was going to spend the night alone in what was hopefully a table in the corner. She didn’t really know anyone besides Emily, just being acquaintances from work more than anything. She was surprised she even got invited to the wedding, considering she was sure no one else from their office had gotten any invite and Emily was definitely closer to their other coworkers than she was to Holly.

Table 12 already had stuff set at every seat except for one, with no one to be found to claim any of it, leaving Holly to take the only seat left and sit there by herself. 

“I thought I was the only person who was going to be here alone,” she heard someone say, looking up to see the first person return to the table, taking the seat next to her. The curly haired boy with a stupid smile on his face plopped down, his hands folded in front of him on the table. “I’m Matthew.”

“What makes you think I’m here alone?” she asked him, despite believing the answer was obvious. 

“Well,” he starts, pointing out to the dance floor to a couple wrapped in each other's arms, dancing way too close and way too slow for Hollys liking considering a classic rock song was playing. “Carson and Cameron are here together, as are Michelle and Nathan, Jacob and Anna, and Eloise and Sadie. That leaves you and me as the last two seats, unless you’re sharing a seat with your date, or you’re at the wrong table.”

Holly felt her face get hot at his observation, narrowing her eyes at this stranger who was already reading her way too well for her liking. “Why do you know all of them?”

“I grew up with Emily, her childhood friends are my childhood friends, and you, my other dateless friend, are not one of them. I’m Matthew.” 

“I’m not dateless,” she tries to defend herself.

“Ok, ‘Not Dateless’” Matthew starts, Holly unable to stop herself from rolling her eyes at the Dad joke, “Where’s your date then and why aren’t you sitting at the table with them?”

“I’m with him,” Holly panics, pointing to a random guy on the dance floor.

“No, you’re not,” Matthew teases, a stupid smirk on his face that made Holly more irritated with each passing second. 

“And how would you know that?” 

“Because,” he starts, his gaze following back to the dance floor as they watched a guy approach him with drinks, kissing him quickly before they went over to their own seats, “Collins is here with his boyfriend Andreas.” 

“No, not him,” she tried to play it off, pointing to another guy who immediately was greeted by someone she could only assume was his girlfriend based on how they kissed each other.” 

“You still want to try to keep this up, or are you just going to tell me your name and why you don’t have a date?”

Holly chewed the inside of her lip, shifting slightly to try to pull her dress down her legs a little more. There was no reason why this Matthew guy should be egging her on the way he was. But there was something about that smirk of his that she couldn’t resist, which was a definite sign that she needed alcohol in her system as soon as possible, the glass in front of her suddenly looking like it wasn’t going to be enough as she took a long sip of it. “Every person I asked had other plans,” she finally admitted, hating that she had to say it out loud. 

It shouldn’t bother her as much as it did, but she wished she had someone to go with her, someone who could match their tie with her dress, who would sit next to her in her car so she wouldn’t have to listen to her ‘Songs that make me want to walk into a river in a good way?’ playlist by herself for the half hour drive back to her apartment. She couldn’t even find a friend to sit next to her while they ate food and danced like idiots for a night. It was humiliating when she thought of it that way.

“Dates are overrated, anyway,” Matthew tells her, seeing her change in expression. “If you really want a date, I can be him for the night.” 

Holly can’t help but laugh, relaxing into her seat as everyone else starts to shuffle back to their tables, the bridal party about to come in. “Only if you tell me why you don’t have a date.”

“I told you, they’re overrated.” 

“Maybe, but they’re still nice.” 

“I didn’t even ask anyone.” 

“You didn’t ask or you couldn’t get anyone to come with you?”

Holly smiles as Matthew pretends to be hurt, a groan coming out from him as he clutched his chest. “Oh, you know how to hurt me,” he stops, still waiting for her to tell him her name.

“Holly.”

“Holly, you know how to hurt me already. But, most of my friends are back home for the summer, so it wasn't worth it to ask anyone.” 

“I was going to say, it would seem weird that you wouldn’t be able to pull a date,” Holly lets slip.

Matthew smirks at her, raising his eyebrow as he leaned closer to her so their tablemates don’t listen in on their conversation. He drapes his arm around her chair, getting so close to her that she can smell his cologne over everything else around her. “And why would that be?”

“Despite being a pain in the ass to complete strangers?” Holly starts, taking in a deep breath, finishing her glass of wine. With the alcohol coursing through her, she heard herself say, “You're not horrible to look at, you don’t strike me as the guy to have a hard time getting a girl.” 

“And I could say the same thing about you, Holly,” Matthew told her. He pulled away, one of the guys he had pointed out before greeting him with that weird handshake guys always do.  The crowd quieted down after a few minutes, the DJ announcing the bridesmaids and groomsmen’s entrances before Kevin and Emily finally came in. 

Matthew leaned over to Holly before the bride and groom came in, the stubble on his chin and the heat of his breath tickling her cheek as he whispered, “Save me a dance?” 

Holly wasn’t exactly sure how she got here, surrounded by skinny blonde women and incredibly in shape hockey players considering she was neither, but here she was, at the wedding of one of Matthew’s teammates having the time of her life. She had been to her fair share of weddings, but this wedding was, by far, the best one so far. 

She actually knew exactly how she got there. After Emily and Kevin’s wedding, Matthew had walked her to her car, told her he was actually planning on staying the night in the hotel in the rooms they had blocked off and invited her to stay with him. Any other day or any other person, Holly wouldn’t dream of saying yes, but there was something about Matthew that she couldn’t say no to. With an emergency overnight bag always in the trunk of her car, she had no reason to say no to the man who made the wedding she dreaded that much more tolerable and enjoyable.

The next morning, the two of them were sitting at breakfast when he said, “So, there are a million first dates every day. Want to become my one in a million?”

Holly couldn’t help but laugh, starting to choke on the coffee she was drinking when he said that, a stupid grin on his face like he was so proud of the line he just delivered. “How often does that line work for you?”

“Apparently not as often as I would like,” he groans, that smile still on his face, the one Holly couldn’t resist mirroring. 

“I guess I can be your one in a million just once.”

The first date turned into a second, which turned into a third, which turned into them being together for one month, then two, now three months into a relationship and Matthew officially calling her his girlfriend and wanting to introduce her to all his teammates. What better way to do that than at a wedding, the same type of event where they first met? 

“You are,” Matthew whispers in her ear, slipping his arm around her waist to pull her close to him, “The most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.” Matthew dips down to kiss her, pulling her as close to him as he possibly can, hearing the whistles of his teammates around them to ‘get a room,’ Holly blushing knowing that Matthew already had the room key tucked away in his pocket for later that night.

“I’m pretty sure you’re supposed to say that about the bride tonight,” Holly teases, giving him a quick kiss as everyone clears off the dance floor, dragging Matthew along with her. 

Matthew shrugs, rushing in front of her to get her seat for her, surrounded by his teammates and their dates for her to sit with. “I don’t really care about that, I care about you.” 

His hand slips onto her thigh as the bridal party comes in, his teammate looking happier than she had ever seen him before. Holly sat there with Matthew, his fingers tracing patterns on her leg through her dress, thinking about her own wedding.

Would she get married to Matthew? Or was he just a pit stop on the way to her actual future partner? Would the bridal party wear the blue and yellow color scheme she had picked out for the longest time on a Pinterest board, or would she end up with another color scheme that her partner would also like? Would her childhood best friend be her maid of honor, would her brother, would it be someone else? Would her dress be the one she saw that she fell in love with when she was out with her mom that one time, the one with the long sleeves and beaded top, a slit that would drive her future partner crazy and most of all, had pockets?

Would she be happy with her life after her wedding? 

“What are you thinking about?” Matthew pulls her back to reality, whispering in her ear before placing a kiss on her cheek. 

Holly looks at him, not wanting to freak him out about thoughts of the future when their present relationship was still so new. “That the bride is the most beautiful woman here,” she says, pulling a small laugh from Matthew.

“She’s got nothing on you.”

Matthew couldn’t keep his hands off Holly the entire night, anxiously waiting for their first night away together in the hotel room he had gotten for them, the rest of the team probably feeling the same as he did. But this was Holly, the one he met by chance at a wedding, and the one he could already see himself marrying despite the fact that they had just met. His mom always told him and Brady that they would know fairly soon when they found their person, and he was sure the second he saw Holly sitting alone at the table that night that he was going to spend his life with her.

“You seem nervous about something,” Johnny said, following Matthew’s gaze as Holly left the room to use the bathroom.

“Where did you and Meredith go for your first night away together?” Matthew blurts out to his teammate.

Johnny looked a little surprised by his question, searching his brain to remember when that even was. “I want to say it was just over the off season when we first started dating? She had a weekend off and we went up to her parents cabin somewhere in Pennsylvania. Why?”

“Holly and I haven’t had the chance to spend the night away with each other. She’s been busy with school and work and I want this to be worth it for her.” 

Meredith leans over, having been listening to her husband's conversation. “The way you look at her, I’m sure she already thinks you’re worth it. She wouldn’t be here thrown into the fire with all the guys if she didn’t think it’s worth it.”

Matthew relaxes into his seat, Meredith and Johnny going on reminiscing about their relationship while Matthew’s mind went elsewhere. He wanted this night to be perfect for Holly, he just didn’t know how he was going to do that. He could sneak off to the front desk before they head up, and ask what they could do, what they could send up, that he would pay for anything and everything. Worst case, he asked Holly what else she would want, and he could get it, no questions asked. 

----------

“I always thought you were going to end up with him,” Holly heard in the bathroom. She peered through the crack in the stall door, seeing two of the wedding guests washing their hands at the sink. She had no idea who they were talking about, but she couldn’t make herself known now. They had to know someone else was in the bathroom with them since the door to her stall was closed, right?

“He’s only been dating her for, what, three months? Not even? They’ll break up,” the other girl shrugs. She turns to rest her back against the sink, her phone in her hand. “I mean, look at her,” she says, turning her phone to her friend.

“She’s ok. I mean, you’re so much better.” 

The other girl shrugs. “Matthew wouldn’t date someone like that for long, come on. She’s nothing like the girls he’s dated before.”

Holly felt her breath hitch at the drop of Matthew’s name, finally connecting the dots that they were talking about her, talking about they didn’t think she was good enough or pretty enough for Matthew, that he had never ‘dated someone who looked like her’ before and they didn’t get why they would when the girl standing there with the phone, whatever her name may be, was clearly a better match for him. 

She knew exactly what they meant. Holly wasn’t the smallest person; she was curvy, she filled in her clothes, and she loved exactly how she looked. The body she has is the body she wants, but she was always wary of her body being the body a guy would want. She had been dumped many times because of her size, and she wasn’t even that big. She was average, she looked fine, but there were some awful men who didn’t think so. Matthew had been one of the first ones to not seem to care, but what if he really did? What if the girl in the bathroom got to him and made him realize that he could do better than Holly?

The girls leave the bathroom, Holly coming out of the stall to wash her hands. She looks at her reflection in the mirror, the conversation she overheard having clearly shaken her, wiping away the tears that she didn’t know had fallen down her cheeks, making a beeline to Matthew. He was the one she wanted to go find be with. 

“Hey, you’ve been gone a while,” Matthew says, his face lighting up when Holly finally sits down next to him. 

“Uh, yeah,” Holly says, clearly not all there, “Long line for the bathroom, girls needing help doing touch ups, you know, the normal.” 

Matthew stares at his girlfriend, her hair slightly different than how it was when they left that morning, her eyeliner gone, and just overall, off. “What’s up? Something’s wrong.” 

“What?” 

“Did something happen in the bathroom?” he asks, a concerned look on his face as he gently takes her hand in his. 

“Um,” Holly swallows, not wanting to talk about that with all of his teammates around. She wasn't even sure who the girls really were, just that they were sitting a few tables away, potentially there as each other dates from what it looked like. “No.”

“Holl,” Matthew starts.

“How much longer do you want to stay down here?” Holly cuts him off. 

Matthew takes a second to process, looking out to see that a lot of his teammates had already left to go to their respective hotel rooms, the party already dying down for the night. “As long as you want to, I guess.” 

Holly gets up suddenly, dragging Matthew along with her. “We’re going.” Holly marches past the girls at the other table, stopping in her tracks to turn and face Matthew, catching him off guard with a kiss right in front of them. 

Matthew relaxes into it, wrapping his arms tightly around Holly and forgetting for a moment where they were. He pulls away, a grin on his face to mirror his girlfriend. “Anything you want tonight,” he says, tightening his grip on her, “I will do, no questions. Anything for you.” He leads Holly out to the elevators, not noticing the smirk she flashes the two girls, their jaws dropping in disbelief as he eagerly pulls her away. 

Holly didn’t know why she was nervous. She had no reason to be. How could she be nervous about being maid of honor at her best friend’s wedding? She had been by Fiona’s side through literally everything they encountered together, from her first breakup with her first boyfriend Malcolm back in high school, to her panic when she thought that she would lose Patrick to another woman for whatever reason she had planted in her head only to find out that he was being weird because he was planning on proposing and could barely function as a human without her. 

So why the fuck was she nervous? 

Maybe because she found it weird that not only was she Fiona’s maid of honor, Matthew was Patrick’s best man. The weirdest part of their relationship wasn’t meeting at Emily and Kevin’s wedding over a year ago, it was realizing that each other’s best friends were getting married to each other, having met in college, falling in love, and asking the two of them to be the head of their wedding parties without so much as thinking about the fact that they would be dating each other.

Holly and Matthew were standing right in front of Fiona and Patrick, the wedding party being announced by their DJ partner pair by partner pair. Matthew had been acting weird most of the night; not about standing by Patrick’s side, but for some other reason that he wouldn’t tell Holly. 

Maybe that’s what was putting Holly on edge, the inability to read Matthew despite the fact that they had been dating for a year already. Shouldn’t she be able to tell more about him other than ‘something was off?’

She feels Matthew’s hand take hers as the couple in front of them get announced. His normal calm demeanor is masked by the cold sweat on his hands, coupled with the fact that he was obviously shaking about something. “Are you ok?” Holly asks him.

Matthew swallows, feeling a lump form in his throat. “Yeah, yeah,” he croaks out, “I’m good.” Something about this wedding made Matthew uneasy. He had the gut feeling that something was going to go wrong, but he had no idea what it was. The anxiety in the pit of his stomach, that weird feeling of static inside his body that he couldn’t make go away no matter what he did. 

Holly and Matthew are announced as the maid of honor and best man, their cue to go out. Matthew feels Holly pull on his arm to get him to enter the ballroom for Fiona and Patrick’s reception. He felt like he was being dragged into much more than a wedding reception for his friend, trying to put on the biggest smile as he could without looking fake while he and Holly glided in, doing the little spin and dip the two of them had planned as their entrance. 

Matthew looked into Holly’s eyes, praying that she couldn’t see the fear in his eyes over whatever he felt was coming. She smiles at him, the love in her eyes instantly making him feel calm. There was nothing he could be afraid of when he was with Holly. She was the one he loved, so what could go wrong? 

The two of them go off to the side, Matthew’s arms wrapping around Holly and pulling her close to him as they saw their best friends come in, the new husband and wife making their entrance for the first time together, sharing their first dance. 

The crowd breaks up, Holly and Matthew splitting up as they go to see their friends. Matthew sees some people he knew through Holly, some he knew through Patrick, but he didn’t realize until now that he really didn’t know anyone. He wasn’t close with anyone at the wedding besides Holly and Patrick. Matthew beelines to the bar, hoping that the alcohol would help soothe whatever anxiety he was feeling.

“Hey, man,” Matthew hears, feeling someone hit his back in what was probably supposed to be a friendly pat, sending his stomach straight into the bar. He turns around, seeing his friend Brighton. He shouldn’t even call him his friend; he was just some kid he knew growing up that never seemed to get the message that his overconfidence and pompous attitude wasn’t appealing to anyone. “Was that your girl that you walked in with?”

“Uh, yeah, that’s Holly,” Matthew says, getting his drink, finishing in almost immediately and setting it back down on the bar. He looks at the bartender, not sure if he should ask for another drink but getting one anyway. 

“She’s hot,” Brighton says, leaning against the bar with his back towards the bartender, scanning the venue.

“Um, thanks?” Matthew says, not sure how else to respond to that. It’s not like he was wrong; he of course thought Holly is hot. He thought she’s beautiful, lovely, gorgeous, absolutely perfect. There was nothing he could find about her that he didn’t like. It was just weird to hear Brighton say it. 

Brighton mutters something, Matthew not caring enough to even ask him to repeat it. The two of them watch Holly and the bridesmaids dancing with Fiona, all of them enjoying their time together. Holly was beaming. Matthew could feel the smile growing on his face while he watched her have fun, his heart skipping a beat when she waved at him before her attention was pulled back to her friends while they danced to an old Fall Out Boy song. 

“So is the next wedding we’re going to yours?” Brighton asks him, pulling Matthew back down to earth and away from Holly.

He felt his heart racing, not in the way it did when Holly looked at him. It was the static feeling back from before. Despite the fact that their entire relationship was established at weddings, it wasn’t something that Matthew had thought about. They met at a wedding, they first said ‘I love you,’ to each other at a wedding. He knew she was the one at a wedding, but he didn’t think farther than that. He didn’t really process what being ‘the one’ meant for him. “Probably not.”

“You haven’t even talked about it?” Brighton asks, a genuinely shocked look on his face. 

Matthew shakes his head, suddenly feeling the need for twelve more drinks in his system before he even thought about answering that, despite the fact that it was a horrible idea. He downs the drink he had in his hand, putting the empty on the bar top without saying another word. The two drinks he had already hadn’t done anything for him yet, and he was worried with whatever anxiety he was feeling, more alcohol in his system would either make it worse, or make him absolutely numb, and he wasn’t sure what was worse. 

“We talk about weddings, but not our own.”

“You don’t even have a ring?” 

“No. We’re not getting married,” he says, rushing off from Brighton to get some fresh air.

Holly looks around, seeing Matthew adjusting his tie away from his neck as he makes a beeline for the door, pushing them open and causing them to hit the wall behind them with more force than he probably intended. 

“Is he alright?” Mikala, another bridesmaid asks, watching the same event that Holly had just seen. 

“I have no idea,” she says, bunching up her dress and scoping off her heels and throwing them by their table to go running after him. 

She goes around the venue a few times, the pavement beneath her feet making her question whether it would have been a better idea to keep the heels and traipse through the grass and on the asphalt or not. 

Holly finds Matthew sitting with his back against the building, legs out in front of him. He had his head leaning back with his face towards the sky, his eyes closed. She sits down beside him, gently resting her hand on his thigh so she doesn’t startle him. “Hey,” she says in a low voice, a soft smile on her face as he looks at her. “Are you ok?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine,” he lets out. 

“No you’re not,” she tells him, shaking his head. She takes his hands in hers, hoping that she can try to help. “You know you can talk to me. What’s going on?”

“Remember me telling you about Brighton?” 

Holly tries to search her memory. She knew he was a character in The Nanny. “That really annoying kid from when you were younger? The one who tried to, like, buy everyone’s friendship because he had a pool or something?”

“That one.” Matthew puts his head on Holly’s shoulder, taking a deep breath as she rests her head on his. “I don’t know, he just freaked me out.”

“What did he do?”

“He asked about when we were getting married.”

Holly laughed, Matthew feeling her shoulders shaked. He squeezed his eyes shut as tight as he could, too afraid to open them and see Holly as she lifted her head from his. He felt her kiss the top of his head, his breath hitching. “Yeah? What did you tell him.”

“That we aren’t getting married.” Holly sits there quietly, trying to figure out what he means by that. “Hol?”

“Like, ever?”

Matthew lifts his head off her shoulder, finally taking a look at her. She’s staring down at their hands, the wind moving her hair ever so slightly in front of her face. “What?”

“We’re not going to get married ever?”

“I don’t know.” 

“You haven’t thought about it?”

“You have?”

“Of course I have, Matthew.” She looks up to the sky, trying to stop any tears from falling from her face. “I would say yes immediately if you asked. You know that.” 

“It’s not like we have to spend our time thinking about it. We’re just having fun, aren’t we?”

Holly turns to Matthew immediately, Matthew unable to read the emotion on her face. “That’s all this is to you? Just fun?” “I mean, not just fun-” Matthew starts.

“Matthew, fuck,” Holly cuts him off. “You know that this is more to me. I thought that this was more to you. You don’t even think about us getting married? After all the weddings we’ve been to together?

“Matthew, I’ve told you everything about my past relationships. I’ve told you about the guys who showed up for a date only to leave immediately because they saw me in person and decided that I was ‘too big’ for them to date. I told you about the guys who only wanted to be with me because of hookup culture. I told you about the guys who hit on me because they had bets with their friends to see who could date me first just as a joke. You knew this was more to me than just fun.” 

Holly gets up from the grass, wiping off herself as Matthew scrambles to get up with her. “Holly, wait, come on.” 

“Matthew, you don’t even think about marrying me?”

“I don’t think about marriage with anyone,” he tries.

“We’ve had this conversation. You know what I wanted. You’ve known what I wanted. And if we don’t want the same thing, we’re not going to work,” Holly lets out, trying everything she could to not let the tears fall down her face. She turns away from him, trying to get back inside before she had to make her speech about the love her best friend felt for her new husband, right as she felt her own love breaking apart.

“Holly what are you saying?” Matthew asks, trying to follow her.

“We’re finished. We can’t be together.” 

Holly hadn’t seen Matthew in months. Honestly, she was praying that she wouldn’t see him tonight, hoping that he had forgotten about Ryland’s wedding altogether. He was her best friend in college, and it wasn’t her fault that they got close in the year the two of them were dating. She had asked Ryland if he knew if Matthew was coming, but Bella had been the one who handled the guest list. 

“Hey, are you ok?” Tyler, one of Ryland’s childhood friends, asked Holly. The two of them were paired off for the bridal party, seemingly spending more time with each other than any other pair in the party, other than the ones who were married and already couples. 

Holly had met Tyler a few times while they were in college, the random drunken weekend that Tyler wanted since he went to a school in a small town while Holly and Ryland went to a larger school. She liked spending time with him, and sure, there was a crush she had on him at one point when she first met him, but did she really like him, or was he just drunk?

“Yeah, I’m good,” Holly fakes her happiness. “I just haven’t had much to eat today. Didn’t want to mess up my makeup.” 

Tyler seems to buy it, one by one the pairings going off to the reception and doing their thing. All Holly and Tyler had planned to do was walk in, Tyler would twirl Holly, and they would do some weird bow that Tyler had insisted on. Nothing fancy, nothing too boring. 

The two of them go in, Holly not focusing on anything in particular, hoping that she wouldn’t see the one person she didn’t want to see. Tyler twirls her, Holly losing her balance somehow. She feels Tyler’s arms around her before she can fall, his hand spread across her back, hoping that he could save it make it look like whatever was about to happen was meant to happen. 

“I’ve got you, don’t worry,” he whispers to her as she stands up, Holly feeling her breath hitch at the feel of his breath against her ear. 

“Thanks for that,” she says, feeling the heart rush to her cheeks. 

The two of them make their way to the table with the rest of the wedding party, Ryland and Bella wanting to do their first dance after they ate instead of doing it as soon as they come in like they saw in other weddings. “I’m gladI got paired with you, it’s been good to spend time with you,” Holly hears Tyler whisper to her as the catering staff came around with the first course. 

“I’m glad, too,” she says, feeling like she was lying to him. She didn’t hate Tyler. He just wasn’t...

“Matthew,” she hears Tyler say, looking up to see the one person she didn’t want to interact with standing over her. “How have you been?”

“Uh, good, good,” Matthew says, not looking away from Holly. He hadn’t seen her in six months, but that didn’t mean he didn’t want to. He couldn’t bring himself to block her from his phone the way he was sure she had. He couldn't stop looking at her Instagram feed to see if she had posted anything or been tagged in anything with another guy. He couldn’t stop pulling up her contact, his finger hovering over the call button to ask her to come over or if he could see her whenever he wanted to talk to her, which seemed to be more than once a day. “Holly, do you mind if we talk for a second?”

Holly felt a lump in her throat forming. She looked between him and Tyler, the latter seeming to have no idea that anything was going on. She shouldn’t talk to him. She couldn’t talk to him. “Sure.” 

Matthew extends his hand, Holly taking it and immediately feeling the claminess between the two of them. They walk out of the hall, past the entrance they had all come through less than an hour before, and out to the front, the sky slowly turning dark as the sunset around them. “How have you been?” Matthew asks.

“Good.” Holly could already feel the tears starting to form in her eyes. She didn’t want to have a conversation with him about them. She wanted to be inside, celebrating her friend’s wedding, getting ready to have any and all food and alcohol that was put in front of her so she could go up to her hotel room and just forget the night even happened. 

Matthew looks down at his feet, juggling a rock back and forth between his feet. He had no idea what he was going to say. He just knew that when he saw Holly, he had to talk to her. He just wished he had come up with a plan as to what he was going to say. 

They stand there in silence as neither of them wants to break it, the sounds of crickets starting to come out as the only noise between the two of them. 

“I miss you,” Matthew finally blurts out, after what felt like too long of a silence. He couldn't take standing there without saying something, and he knew that Holly wouldn’t be the first to break. She stands there, unable to look at him.

“I wish we didn’t break up,” he keeps going. “I hate that I don’t get to see you every day anymore.”

“That’s what we decided was best,” she says.

“No, that’s what you decided was best.” 

“Matthew, we wanted different things.” 

“I know that I wanted you. I still want you. I don’t want anyone else. I would do anything for you, you know that. Just because I didn’t think about marriage didn’t mean I didn’t think about you.” “Matthew.” 

“I’ve tried to get my mind off you. I tried to do everything I could. I threw myself even further into hockey, but I kept looking in the stands to see if I could find you at every game I played. I spent hours watching mindless shows and movies on any and every streaming platform and channel I had, but I kept wanting to call you to tell you that you would love it or to laugh about how bad it was. I even tried to pick up a new hobby. Do you know how many times I stabbed myself trying to sew a fucking pillow? And somehow, even that made me think of you?”

She couldn’t help but laugh at the last part, trying to stifle any show of emotion. “Matthew, you could have easily gotten over me.” She say that she got over him, but she couldn’t. She couldn't lie to him like that.

“Holly, the only time I leave the apartment at this point is for practice or games because I’m terrified that you’ll show up and want to talk or need something or even just want to scream at me and take any anger out on me, but that I won’t be there for you to do it. You think that’s a thing people who can get over someone can do?”

“Matthew.”

“If you think for a second that I ever did stop loving you, or that I ever will stop loving you, then you never really knew me. If you think that I wouldn’t want to marry you, spend every moment with you, then maybe we shouldn’t have been together.” 

“Matthew,” she says, grabbing his face to get his attention. “Matthew, I’ve missed you, too.” 

Holly

Wedding 1 dress

Wedding 2 dress

Wedding 3 dress

Wedding 4 dress

Wedding dress

[typical-simplelove]

Strangers -> Jacob Markstrom (as part of the Alternate Universe to Peter Pan)

Summary: The prologue to Body Language and Peter Pan. The night that started it all and brought you into Matthew’s and Jacob’s lives. The night that Matthew and Jacob fell in love with you, told from Jacob’s point of view.

Author's Note: This is another installment of the Happiness Begins Series and the Peter Pan Universe! In terms of the Happiness Begins series, this is a stand-alone, but in terms of the Peter Pan Universe, it might be beneficial to read the two fics linked in the summary. I'm tagging @2manytabsopen because you are my true motivation to continue this series! I hope you enjoy this installment, and please, let me know what you think!

Word Count: 4.3k (including song lyrics)

Warnings: explicit!female reader; mentions of alcohol; Matthew's an ass in this

With his eyes trained on the end of the aisle, Jacob’s attention is captivated by the tunes of the song that was picked out. Anytime now, she’d be stepping out, and at that moment, Jacob’s life is going to change once again. 

I came here looking for another excuse To run away from something beautiful It's like it's driving me closer to you Every step back pulls me right back to you

Walking into the bar, the boys take their regular tables in the back as jackets cover chairs. They play a few quick rounds of rock-paper-scissors to determine the designated driver and who was to pay for the first round of drinks. Once those people were designated, the group takes their seats and set in for a night of drinks and hanging out. 

“What brings you out tonight?” Matthew asks, probing Jacob. “You don’t come out often.”

Jacob glances at Matthew for a second before he trains his attention on other guests walking around the bar. 

Matthew was right; Jacob didn’t go out often. Although it was fun, he’d much rather spend the night at home on the couch watching a movie with a glass of wine or under the blankets with a good book. Recently, though, spending the nights in his apartment on his own was starting to get boring. There was no one there with him because, well, he was alone. Sure, Jacob liked being single and didn’t have any major issues with being single, but sometimes, only hearing his breathing or the only sounds in his apartment being the quiet local traffic drove him crazy. Jacob was craving some acquaintance or companionship other than his teammates that happened to stop by after practice. 

What Jacob really wanted was someone to share his life with. He wanted someone to have and to hold. He wanted someone to be there when he left or when he got home (or to come home to him). He wanted someone to laugh at his silly jokes. He wanted someone’s laughter to echo through the apartment. 

Jacob wanted a life partner. 

All those thoughts swirled in Jacob’s mind as his focus trained back on Matthew. “Just wanted to try something new. You know, get out of the house. Broaden my social circle.”

“What, are we not enough for you?” Matthew teases, a glint in his eyes. 

“You know what I mean,” Jacob responds, holding back an eye roll. Matthew opens his mouth to say something else, but thankfully, drinks were forcefully placed on the table, stopping Matthew from talking. 

As conversations build up across the table, Jacob returns to his normal wallflower state. It wasn’t that anyone was leaving him out; he just wasn’t really in the mood. If Jacob was going to go out in this atmosphere, then he really had to be in the mood, and currently, he wasn’t in that mood. Jacob kind of regrets going out. All he wanted was a nice glass of wine, to sit on his couch, and relax. Maybe a movie on the TV, too. Just anything but here. 

His eyes dart up when he notices everyone at the table has stopped talking. Jacob’s eyes follow their eye line and notice them starting at a group of girls that walked into the bar. Just like that, Jacob’s life changed forever. 

She was standing there, fiddling with the hem of her shirt, as she let herself soak in the atmosphere. 

Jacob’s eyes scanned over the top half of her body—the only half visible from where he was sitting. That’s when it all made sense. He finally knew the person that would complement his body and fit in the crevices perfectly. He finally knew the person that would never fail to put a smile on his face. He finally knew the person that would make the ridiculously cheesy sitcoms and rom-coms bearable. He finally knew the person that Jacob risk it all for. He found the person that he’d conquer the world for. He found the person that he’d give it all up for. 

The world and Jacob were moving because they had to, but now, Jacob’s world was spinning the way it was supposed to. It finally made sense. 

“Woah,” Matthew says under his breath. Woah, indeed, Jacob thinks to himself, knowing that Matthew was probably talking about the same person. Matthew looks at his friend and says, “What do you say? Should we go over together?”

Jacob doesn’t say anything. He just stares ahead at the girl. How was he supposed to talk to her? “I’ll go over in a bit.”

“Did you want me to make you an introduction?” Matthew asks, slightly teasing. 

Jacob shakes his head. “I’ll be fine.” 

That’s a lie. Jacob couldn’t do it. He knew he wouldn’t be able to do it. Who was he kidding? Jacob was frazzled and flustered, and he hadn’t even talked to the girl yet. What was he to do? 

Jacob sat at the table, gripping his drink as he watches Matthew walk up to the group of girls. The entire group was filled with beautiful people. Matthew could have picked anyone, but he went with her, with you. When Jacob saw you smile at Matthew, his heart fell to his stomach. You were supposed to be smiling at Jacob. Jacob was supposed to be the one who elicited that smile from you. Jacob was supposed wrapped around your finger, not Matthew. Jacob was supposed to be enamored with your personality and aura, not Matthew. 

It was supposed to be Jacob, not Matthew, but it ended up being Matthew because Jacob was too chicken. Jacob let the person who he knew would change his life slip through his fingers. He messed it up, and Jacob knows he’ll never be able to have the chance again. 

How did Jacob let himself mess up so badly?

Time stands still and it's only us What we feel started way before we ever touched Just imagine only us Yeah, you found me right before I'd given up

It was four days later, and Jacob was still reeling from seeing you for the first time. How did Jacob find someone so perfect for him, yet he couldn’t even talk to them? How did Jacob find the person he’d feel immense pride and joy to bring home to meet his mother, yet they don’t even know he exists? How did Jacob finally find the person that makes all the love songs and poems and sonnets make sense, but he couldn’t even muster the courage to talk to them? 

It was frustrating, to say the least.

Jacob has spent his entire adult life assuming that when he met the one, things would work out according to plan and in his favor. Jacob never thought that one of his teammates would feel the same pull that the person had and gravitate towards them first. Jacob thought he’d be able to talk to them, and then everything else would make sense and work out for itself. 

How did everything get blown to pieces in a matter of seconds? 

Oh, right, Jacob didn’t have the courage to talk to you, but Matthew did. Matthew always seemed to have the courage to talk to someone else. Normally, Jacob didn’t care, but then it was you that Matthew managed to talk to first. It was you, bright eyes and smile, who got Matthew’s attention instead of Jacob's. It was you, and he wished that he didn’t clam up and stand there, frozen. If he could do it all over again, he would. 

“So, you got lucky last night. Again.” Jacob hears someone say to Matthew. Jacob rolls his eyes, not wanting to hear about another one of Matthew’s escapades. 

“It was fun,” Matthew says, a smirk covering his face. He eyes Jacob knowing that Jacob wanted the same person. “I don’t normally hang out with the same girl more than once, but—”

A few hoots and hollers fill the locker room. That’s when Jacob realizes who Matthew is talking about—you. You captured Jacob’s attention like a fisherman setting his net out to sea. Your radiant smile lit up his life like a spotlight. You slowly became everything to Jacob, yet you’ve never even spoken to him.

Jacob doesn’t notice the sneaky glance that Matthew gives. Matthew knows exactly what he’s doing, but having no reaction out of Jacob isn’t what Matthew wanted. 

“Jacob, any fun plans last night?”

That little shit. 

“Nope,” Jacob grumbles. He hurries out onto the ice before anyone can comment on his mannerisms. 

He’s skating around the ice to try to clear his thoughts. He doesn’t know why he’s acting like this. He hasn’t spoken to you. He’s only looked at you from across a bar. How’s that for depressing?

In movies, when it’s love at first sight, both parties fall in love. In this case, though, only Jacob fell. Only Jacob fell head over heels for you. Jacob doubts you even looked at him at all that evening. 

Even if Jacob had a chance with you, he knows he could never take it. There was an unspoken code, and if Jacob tried anything, he’d be breaking that code. 

For all intents and purposes, Jacob has to find a way to forget about you even though he knows you’re the one. 

I just saw the lightning strike Knew it right then when I looked in your eyes And I said to myself, "It's no surprise we ain't strangers" Strangers tonight Must be from a different life Been here before and it just feels right No, this ain't the first time for you and I, we ain't strangers Strangers tonight

During warmups before a game, Jacob doesn’t normally scan the crowd. He gives a few quick glances to see if there are any young kids who he can give a stick or puck, and that’s it. Jacob tends to focus on warming up and leaves the crowd and that interaction for during the game. 

This time, though, something was drawing him to scan the crowd. He doesn’t know what he’s looking for or why he’s so drawn to that one section. 

As he’s skating around, Jacob’s eyes keep going to that one section of seats. Why is it striking him tonight? As per usual, it’s filled with fans. No one struck him out of the ordinary. That is until he saw a familiar head of hair. He knows that hair. It’s been plaguing his dreams and thoughts since that first night. 

You. 

You were there. At the game. A game that Jacob was at. A game where Jacob was currently getting ready for. 

In a matter of seconds, seeing you knocked all of the wind out of him. He continues his motions, but as he looks over at you again (you have yet to notice his obvious staring), he trips and falls. 

“You good man?” someone asks as they skate over to a fallen Jacob. 

He nods. “Just lost my footing for a second.”

The player nods and skates off. Jacob’s grateful that they didn’t ask why Jacob fell. What was he supposed to say? Yeah, the girl that one of our teammates is dating or kind of seeing is here. Did she distract me? Yes. Why? Oh, because I’m in love with her, too. Why didn’t I go talk to her that night? She distracted me, and I couldn’t even open my mouth to breathe she was so captivating. 

Jacob has to get a grip on his thoughts. This was no line of thinking to have before a game. It was an important game, and if Jacob wasn’t at the top of his game, he couldn’t protect his teammates, his family. 

Still, though, Jacob is watching you from the corner of your eye. You must have brought a friend because you’re chatting and laughing away. 

The minute that Jacob gets a glimpse at your smile, all the loud cheers and noises of the crowd fade away. There’s a faint ringing in his ears as he watches you laugh along to whatever your friend was saying. A faint smile crosses Jacob’s face and a blush warms his cheeks as he thinks of what it would be like to be the one on the other end of that smile. That laugh. Those warm eyes. His heart bursts just thinking about it. What would it be like for Jacob to make you smile? What would it be like for Jacob to make you laugh? What would it be like for Jacob to look into your eyes as you talked? What would it be like for Jacob to wake up to your smiling face each and every morning? 

Jacob’s taking a few practice shots off his teammates, but the roaring sounds of the crowd still haven’t returned. He’s still in a daze, acting on autopilot, as the shots come at him. He’s able to stop many of them. He’s not acting dull, but he’s not as sharp as he could be. Jacob can’t tell if you being there is a good thing or a bad thing. Good thing? Jacob gets to see you. Bad thing? You’re distracting but a good distracting. Good thing? Jacob gets to see your smile. 

Yeah, it was an overall good thing for you to be there. 

When the time comes for the team to skate off the ice, Jacob tries to huddle around the back. This way, if he trips when he sees you, fewer teammates will tease him about it. 

Jacob’s staring at you as the file of the ice. He so badly wants to catch your eye, but what would he do if he did? Would Jacob wink or smile? He could barely breathe and you were a couple of hundred feet away. Jacob has no game when it comes to you. You just make him too nervous. 

He’s sitting on his spot in the locker room as the coaches are talking. Should Jacob be listening? Sure, but it wasn’t anything new. As long as Jacob showed up and played hockey, he’d be alright. His thoughts continued to wander to you. He should really get a grip on his thoughts. How would he be able to play the game properly if you were sitting there? Would he be able to get his head in the game? 

Jacob’s still on autopilot as the team makes their way back on the ice for the anthem. He’s excited to see you again, even if you don’t see him. 

His eyes look up to find your familiar face and head of hair, and when he does, his heart falls. A ringing sound echo through his ears as dread fills his stomach. 

You’re wearing a Tkachuk jersey.

Jacob doesn’t know why he’s so upset at seeing you in a Tkachuk jersey. Obviously, Matthew would invite you to a game, and of course, you’d be wearing Matthew’s jersey. But Jacob wanted you to be there for him. Jacob wanted to be the reason why you were sitting in the arena. 

He shakes his head. That wouldn’t happen. Of course, Matthew got the girl because what girl would ever want a guy who can’t even get the nerve to talk to her?

You say my name like it's been on your lips Familiar in ways I can't explain You got a heart that I know I can miss Hold me like that and pull me right back again

“Who’s that?” Jacob asks. He wasn’t familiar with who the girl was sitting at their table at dinner. She was pretty, but Jacob had no idea why she was there or who she was there with. 

“What?” Elias asks, quizzical. 

Jacob nods his head at the mystery girl. “Her.”

Elias shrugs. “I don’t know her name, but she’s here with Matthew.”

“But what about—” Jacob trails off. He doesn’t have to repeat your name. Elias knew. Johnny knew. Everyone in this whole damn universe knew that Jacob had feelings for you. There wasn’t a single person on this planet who could look at the way Jacob looked at you and say it was as “friends.” It was impossible. 

Whenever Jacob saw you with Matthew, he pushed his feelings aside. After all, if Jacob being with you wasn’t how things were supposed to turn out, then he’d want you to be happy. And if that was Matthew, then Jacob guesses he could be okay with it even though Jacob would never let a sister or daughter of his anywhere new Matthew. Jacob knew Matthew’s tendencies to date and sleep around; Jacob doesn’t understand how Matthew doesn’t get lonely or doesn’t want to find that someone. 

“I guess she wasn’t invited?” Elias answers, pulling Jacob out of his thoughts. 

Why wouldn’t Matthew invite you? Jacob’s never seen you in fancy, cocktail outfits, but he just knows that you’d be the most stunning person in this room. If Jacob had brought you as his date, he knows that he wouldn’t ever be separated from you. You were just too radiant. 

Jacob knew that Matthew wasn’t a commitment person. He tended to just have short flings here and there, but this was different. Matthew had the most spectacular person on this planet—someone who could make Jacob the happiest person ever—and he refused to see it. Matthew refused to see who was right there in front of him, and instead, he found solace in his bachelor tendencies. 

“Yeah, but—” Jacob trails off once again in a matter of seconds. He doesn’t have to finish his sentence. Elias understood. The other team members understood. If Jacob had you, he’d never let you go. What he doesn’t understand, though, is why Matthew can’t see it? Matthew has the love of Jacob’s life right in front of them, yet he can’t see it. He can’t see the life he’s missing out on by messing around with other people. 

“Why is he doing this to her?” Jacob mumbles, not sure if his friend heard. Elias did, though, and gives his friend a side-eye. What was Elias supposed to say? Matthew’s heart and mind were wired differently. While Jacob saw someone who’d make him happy for the rest of his life, Matthew saw the same person as short-term happiness. Matthew’s head was so far up his ass he didn’t realize what he had right in front of him. 

“He’s going to hurt her so much,” Jacob mumbles once again. He shouldn’t be saying any of these sentiments out loud, but he needs someone to hear them. Jacob could stand watching you with his teammate (even if it were Matthew) if it meant that you’d find happiness and wouldn’t be heartbroken. What Jacob couldn’t stand was Matthew stringing you along. Matthew was giving you bread crumbs to keep you going back to him. No matter what, the little crumbs Matthew would give you would satisfy you. Jacob didn’t blame you; Matthew was a catch. You, though, could do so much better than Matthew and his ways. Jacob doesn’t think he deserves you either, but Jacob could be so much better to you than Matthew. 

Although the notion hasn’t been addressed, everyone who knows Matthew knows that the girls he’s “seeing” don’t know that they aren’t the only ones. Some do realize that it’s not a forever thing with Matthew, but some don’t. They take the bread crumbs that Matthew has to offer and spin them into a fairytale romance. Jacob can’t blame them, though. Matthew is a charmer and is good at the game. Someone can go from being strangers to Matthew to thinking he’s the light of their life. 

What about Jacob? He might not be as boisterous or cocky or there. He might tend to be more quiet and reserved, but that doesn’t mean Jacob doesn’t have as much to offer. That doesn’t mean that he can’t make someone happy. He can. Jacob can make someone so happy if he had the chance. He’s been waiting his entire life to find that person who would be the one that would change his life. He finally did, but instead of Jacob getting the girl, Matthew did. And when Matthew gets the girl, Jacob knows he won’t ever get the girl. 

Jacob can give a whole loaf of bread, but instead, you take the breadcrumbs. 

And Jacob knows that as you continue to take those breadcrumbs, your heart will get more and more vulnerable until Matthew shatters it. 

Jacob only hopes that you won’t cut him out of your life when that happens. 

Time stands still and it's only us What we feel started way before we ever touched Just imagine only us Yeah, you found me right before I'd given up

One day you were there, and the next you weren’t. One day, Jacob was calling you to see when you were free to watch that book-to-movie adaptation you were going on and on about, and the next Jacob can’t get a hold of you. 

Jacob wasn’t shocked when Matthew brought another girl to the Gala, but he was disappointed. Every time that Matthew brought a different girl as his date to various events or nights out, Jacob prayed and begged a higher being that Matthew would see you. He would see how amazing you were, and how much he was missing out. Only Jacob saw that, though; Matthew never seemed to notice what he had right in front of him. 

That could be the only reason why you weren’t picking up the phone. However, Jacob wasn’t at fault. It wasn’t Jacob’s fault that Matthew brought a different date and you were hurting because of it. All he wanted was to tell you that everything would be okay, but would it? 

And then one day, you left. One day, you were there, and the next, you were in Toronto. You didn’t even tell Jacob. He had to find out from Annica and Elias. For being best friends, it wasn’t fair that you didn’t tell him. Jacob thought you’d tell each other everything, but then you left Calgary, never to return, and didn’t tell him. You didn’t have the heart to tell him. That, somehow, hurt worse than you blocking him and not picking up his calls. 

Then, you called. You were in Toronto, only moving a few days ago. He was ignoring your calls for a few days, but then he couldn’t take it anymore. Every time he saw your phone number, his heart lurched. He couldn’t take it anymore, so he finally picked up the phone.

“Hello?”

But then you hung up. Jacob sighed. Maybe you weren’t ready. But then you called again. There was some yelling and some tears. Mostly, though, Jacob realized he wasn’t angry at you anymore. You talked to each other, and Jacob realized that all the love he has for you wouldn’t fade. With you in Toronto, maybe you’d finally realize how much Jacob loves you. 

Two years after that first phone call, Jacob got the best news he’s ever received. You were back. You’re back in Calgary, and you want to see him. After discussing plans on when and where to meet up, he finally saw you. You were just as radiant and beautiful as the first day he met you. 

And just like that, a happy routine followed just like before. You were there. He was there. And Jacob had his best friend back. And he was okay with that. 

Until he told you. He was drunk, lonely, and wasn’t thinking straight. When you left him after his confession, his heart pooled and tears fell from his eyes. This time, he knows he lost you for good because he couldn’t keep his mouth shut. 

But then you showed up at his door with your own admissions of love.

“I love you, Jacob Markstrom, and if you don’t listen to me and let me love you, I don’t know how I’m going to get through the next day,” you pleaded. 

And with that, everything made sense. You loved Jacob, and he loved you. 

Finally, it seemed, Jacob got the girl, and there wasn’t a greater feeling in the world. 

I came here looking for another excuse To run away from something beautiful It's like it's driving me closer to you Every step back pulls me right back

The past few years of his life flashed behind his eyes as he watched you begin your descent down the aisle. The train of your dress flowed behind you as you took each step. Jacob knew you were stunning and beautiful. Seeing you, though, in the white dress didn’t level to how he’s seen you before. 

When you were at the end of the aisle, Jacob took your hand in his and escorted you to where the officiant was standing. 

He looks at you with a shy smile. It was just like the first Jacob saw you, but this time, he had the girl, and he was nervous because he had the opportunity to cement the seal. He was going to spend the rest of his life with the love of his life. 

It may have been painful, but finally, Jacob got a happy ever after. And he got the girl, too. 

Jacob went from being an absolute stranger to being your best friend to being the cause of your heartbreak to being the person you couldn’t spend the rest of your life without. It all made sense, and it was all worth it. 

I just saw the lightning strike Knew it right then when I looked in your eyes And I said to myself, "It's no surprise we ain't strangers" Strangers tonight Must be from a different life Been here before and it just feels right No, this ain't the first time for you and I, we ain't strangers Strangers tonight

[haddonfieldwhore]

bad idea - matthew tkachuk

flames!matthew tkachuk x draisaitl!fem reader

summary: in a bad mood after losing to calgary, your brother is a dick to you. you decide to get back at him with a little bit of help

warnings: mention of injury/fighting, language, implied smut, crying inside that i wrote anything oilers related

word count: 1.8k battle of alberta 2018

in all your years of watching your older brother leon play hockey, you were sure you had never seen a game as rough as this one. you knew it was to be expected; the game was advertised as the ‘battle of alberta’ for good reason, the edmonton oilers and the calgary flames quite literally going to war on each other from the very second the puck dropped. you weren’t the biggest hockey fan, but you rarely got to see your older brother with his busy schedule, and were looking forward to hanging out with him after the game.

it wasn’t even two minutes into the first period before leon laid a huge hit on calgarys matthew tkachuk, the younger player hitting his head on the ice as he landed and leaving the game for the time being.

while you were cheering for your brothers team to win, as were your friends and family sitting in the crowd next to you, you found yourself hoping that the calgary flame was okay. you would be crucified if you said it out loud, but you found the flames player kind of cute, and always enjoyed watching him play; despite the rivalry that seemed to be brewing between him and your brother. your eyes always ended up on him whenever he was on the ice, and you found it hard to look away. you were pretty sure that tkachuk was only a year older than you, and you found yourself breathing a sigh of relief when he returned to the game, seemingly uninjured.

as the game went on, edmonton had a two nothing lead, but after many more fights, (most of them involving tkachuk in some way) and four goals from calgary, the game was over.

‘this is gonna be a fun drive home,’ you thought as you walked out of the stands to find leon. you had to wait for awhile for the team to change and shower, and you were growing tired waiting around for your brother. your friends and family being bummed about the loss was not helping the time go by faster as you stood around awkwardly while they caught up with eachother.

it was around thirty minutes later that leon finally emerged from the hallway that lead to the visitors dressing room, greeting your group unenthusiastically.

“hey,” you replied, and he merely grumbled in response, barely paying attention to the fact that you were there; and it stung. leon greeted your parents and friends without much more warmth but still you suddenly felt invisible as he talked with them and not you. you hadn’t seen him in months, and he couldn’t even say hello properly? and to make matters worse, your parents had already seen him before the game.

“leon-“

“let’s go,” he mumbled, his jaw clenched as he bumped into your shoulder with his, causing you to stumble slightly.

maybe you were being overly sensitive, but no one seemed to notice how cold he was being; either letting it go because the team lost, or perhaps you were just expecting a warmer greeting from your big brother.

you tried to grab his arm to keep up with him as he walked away, but he pulled it away and shot you a glare.

“i know you’re pissed, but it’s not my fault you guys lost.”

“so it’s my fault?” he countered, and you sighed.

“that’s not what i said-“

“that’s what you’re thinking though, isn’t it?”

“no, leon!” you sighed, trying to remember how he was feeling right now. “if i had known you were gonna be such a sore loser i wouldn’t have come.” he had never been this grumpy after a loss before.

“then maybe you shouldn’t have,” his jaw clenched again, and you could tell from his expression that the conversation was over. you stopped walking while he continued down the hall, your parents catching up to you, oblivious to the argument between you and leon.

“you know what, i’m gonna catch up with you guys tomorrow,” you said, faking a yawn. your family had planned to go for dinner after the game while you were all in town. the oilers had a day off tomorrow, and you hoped by then your brother would be in a better mood.

“are you sure, honey?” your mom asked, and you nodded.

“yeah, i’ll just get a cab back to the hotel. i don’t think leon’s really in a celebrating mood so i’m sure he won’t care. i’ll see you guys in the morning,” you said, before hugging your family and watching them leave the saddledome.

you sighed as you stood in the now nearly empty hallway alone, and before you could do the smart thing and actually take a cab home like you said you would, your felt your legs begin to carry you in the opposite direction.

your feet slowed outside of a certain closed door, fiddling with your hands nervously as you lingered outside the flames dressing room. just as you were deciding that the players had probably already left and began to turn back, the door opened.

after one quick look at your jersey, branded with the oilers logo and leon’s number, matthew tkachuk shook his head with a slight laugh.

“i don’t know how you got back here, but if you’re looking for him you have the wrong locker room,“ he said pointing at your jersey.

“and if i’m looking for you?” you replied, and he looked you up and down again, slower this time as if actually taking in your appearance, not just your wardrobe.

“depends why you’re looking for me. if you’re going to stab me or something for beating your team-“ he joked.

“relax, leon’s my brother; you don’t have a security issue,” you laughed, and he smiled slightly. “and i promise i’m not here to stab you,” you raised your hands in surrender.

“that’s a relief,” he laughed, a more genuine smile on his face this face this time, and you realized that he was even cuter in person. his long curls were messy, still slightly damp from the shower, and he stood quite a bit taller than you. his expression changed as the words ‘brother’ and ‘leon’ clicked in his head, and he crossed his arms over his chest, his muscles flexing under his shirt. “so why are you looking for me?”

“i… uh,” you stuttered, not having thought this far ahead. “i don’t know. i kind of felt bad that my brother hit you so hard, but i guess you got him back in the end,” you said, your gaze falling to the floor. matthew had gotten a few good hits in on leon during a fight later in the game.

“well, i appreciate the thought, but i’m okay. and yeah, i guess we’re even; for now.”

“does that mean you wouldn’t be interested in doing something that would really piss him off?” you asked, looking up to meet his blue eyes, his eyebrow twitching upward slightly with intrigue.

“why do i get the feeling you’re hoping i am interested?” he took a step closer, and you could smell his cologne now. “big brother do something to make you mad?” he asked, and you found yourself smiling, despite the fact that he was teasing you.

“that’s irrelevant,” you rolled your eyes playfully, taking a step closer so you were only about a foot apart now as you looked up at him. “besides, i’m thinking as much as i would like to get him back, it’s probably best he doesn’t know what i’m thinking right now.”

“yeah, i’m sure he wouldn’t be too happy to know his sister was waiting for me after the game,” he agreed, his eyes travelling up and down your body again.

“leon and everyone left already. i told them i was going back to my hotel room…”

“will they notice if you’re not there?” he asked. and you shook your head with a smile. “then i think we could make a quick detour first..” he trailed off, throwing an arm over your shoulder and leading you down the hallway. “here, don’t want to draw too much attention to yourself.” he threw his suit jacket over your shoulders to cover your jersey as the two of you snuck out of the arena and to his car.

“embarrassed to be seen with me?” you teased as he opened the passenger door for you.

“i was more thinking about how it might look to the paparazzi if they happened to stumble upon us leaving together.”

“wouldn’t that be the scandal of the season,” you laughed as he started the car and drove out of the parking lot and towards his house.

you were barely inside the door before you were trapped between it and his body, matthews hands holding your waist firmly.

“you sure you want this?” he asked, his hips pressed against yours as you stared up at him. “it’s probably a really bad idea…”

“i thought you liked breaking the rules?” you smirked, placing your hands on his chest and sliding them upwards to tangle in his hair.

“hmm i have been known to do that,” he leaned down to capture your lips with his, and tou tugged on his hair as his hands slid under your jersey, bunching the material up. “either way, edmonton jerseys are forbidden in my house so this has to come off,” he smiled.

•

“so not that i care, but was this just to piss your brother off?” matthew asked as he walked back from the bathroom after getting cleaned up, dressed in just his sweatpants.

“sounds like you care a little bit-“ you teased, covering yourself with the blankets on his bed.

“i don’t!” he laughed, and you shook your head with a smile as he handed you a t-shirt to wear.

“mhm,” you hummed. “i’ll be honest, i’ve thought you were cute for a while. pissing leon off was really just a bonus.”

“good to know you weren’t just using me-“ you threw a pillow at him and he laughed as he caught it, crawling back into bed next to you. “okay, i kind of used you just as much, so i guess we’re even. i do love any chance to make your brother angry, but i think that this might be my new favourite,” he said before he kissed your lips.

“agreed,” you smiled, reaching over to grab your phone as it began to buzz on his nightstand. leon’s name appeared on the screen, and you rolled your eyes as you answered it, gesturing for matthew to be quiet.

“hello,” you said plainly, still a little mad at him despite how good of a distraction you’d had for the last two hours. you could see matthew moving closer in your peripheral vision, and you felt his breath on your ear.

“i’m sorry,” leon said on the phone held to your other ear, and you sighed, your breath catching as you felt kisses up the side of your neck. you froze as matty nibbled at the skin of your throat, leaving a light bruise behind as you tried not to make a noise.

“yeah, you were kind of an asshole. i’m kind of glad you lost, actually,” you said, and it was half true.

matthew had to stifle a laugh as he laid down next to you, covering his mouth with his hand.

“i wish you had come to dinner. we missed you,” leon sighed.

“it didn’t seem like you missed me very much earlier,” you replied. “i’d appreciate if you didn’t take it out on me when you lose.”

“i know, i’m sorry. i’ll see you in the morning?” he asked.

“yes, i’ll be there for breakfast. goodnight leon.”

“goodnight,” he replied, before ending the call. you tossed your phone aside as you hit matthew playfully on the shoulder.

“do you know how much trouble we would be in if we got caught?”

“i thought that was the half the fun?” he smiled, crawling on top of you and kissing your lips.

“maybe i’ve decided i want to live to do this again sometime.”

“i like that idea.”

disclaimer: all screenshots, events, and/or interactions depicted in this are a work of fiction. i have no association with any parties mentioned

[huggybug]

Would you please write one with either Matthew Tkachuk or Tyson Jost where you get in a fight and you try to leave the house but he won’t let you, like “I know we’re fighting but I need to know you’re safe” 🥺 thanks!

her crazy’s beautiful to me - matthew tkachuk

word count: 1.5k words

it’s my first fic back! who’s excited? me! title from beautiful crazy by luke combs because i was listening to it and i started thinking about matthew so then i came to write this:) anywho.. please enjoy and (as always) feedback is greatly appreciated

“You can’t just expect to get away with this Matthew!” You groaned in frustration.

“I’m not trying to get away with anything!” He exclaimed, throwing his arms up in the air.

“You’re telling me you didn’t hang around a group of girls all night when you were in LA?” You ask, looking him dead in the eye.

You knew that he did. You saw the pictures that were all over social media. How could you not? You family and friends were all sending them to you, to make sure you saw exactly what your boyfriend was up to on the last stop of their road trip.

There weren’t exactly incriminating. He was sitting at a table with Johnny and a couple other guys, the girls were standing next to the table, leaning in a little too close for your liking but ultimately, they weren’t doing anything wrong.

“Babe, seriously ask any of the guys. I didn’t do anything” He tried to defend himself.

“I don’t want to ask the guys Matthew! I don’t want to ever be in a position where I have to ask someone whether my boyfriend cheated on me or not” You were done. He had been defending himself ever since he got home last night and you were able to escape it today, you went for a workout and then a facial before going grocery shopping, anything that kept you out of the house and away from Matthew.

It was a preventative measure. You weren’t sure what you wanted to do. As frustrating as this situation was, you were sure that it wasn’t something to end your three year relationship over but at the same time, you weren’t ready to kiss and make up.

There was a lot of things you wanted to say… more specifically yell but you were holding back. You knew that if you did that, Matthew would come right back at you. It was the one thing you loved and hated about your relationship. You and Matthew were just like on another; overly emotional and hot headed at your worst times.

Your friends said it was a recipe for disaster. That two people who were so alike would never work together, that you’d end up ripping each other apart within weeks but you didn’t. Your relationship was incredibly healthy and it always has been. Then again, you’ve never seen pictures of him surrounded by girls in a club before.

“I was with all the married guys, if I was planning on picking up girls, why wouldn’t I be with the single guys?” It was a fair point, convincing even but you didn’t want to think about that. Your emotions were building up and you were about to explode at him.

“I don’t want to think about this anymore, I have to get out of here”

“Please just let me explain” He sighed, running a hand through his hair.

“I don’t want to hear it Matthew”

“But-”

“No! Just get out of my way” You huff, trying to move past him but he’s body blocking the door.

“Hey, I know you’re mad at me but I need to know you’re safe” His eyes are wide, staring at you and you can feel your resolve start to dissolve. “Please don’t go”

“Matt…” You said softly.

“Don’t run away… go to our room or I’ll go and you can stay out here. I’ll give you safe, just… please don’t leave, I need you to be safe” You looked past him to look out the window. Calgary winters were no joke, the snow was coming down hard and you knew you wouldn’t get far in your car anyways.

“Fine just… give me some time” You turned and stalked off to your bedroom, closing the door behind you and dropping down onto your bed.

…

Three hours. You were sitting on the edge of your bed, staring at the wall for three hours. You thought about a lot. About Matt, about you, and finally about your relationship.

You were leaving the room with a very different mindset than what you entered it with. It was quiet in the apartment when you walked down the hall. The living room was dark, there was only a small lamp on which made you barely able to make out your boyfriend who was sitting on the couch, head in his hands as his elbows dug into his thighs.

“Matthew?” You mumbled, your voice coming out a lot smaller than you’d anticipated. His head shot up as you flipped another lamp on so that you could see a bit better.

“Hey” His voice was rough, he cleared his throat and you finally met his eyes. They were red and a little swollen. He had been crying.

You took a deep breath before sitting next to him, leaving a decent amount of space between you two. “I was ready to leave” You let out with a breath and you could feel him freeze beside you. “When I walked into that room, I was ready to start packing my stuff and go”

“And? Why didn’t you?” He was avoiding eye contact but you could hear the quiver in his voice.

“Because I realized how stupid it would be. I realized that I love you too damn much to pack up and leave” You sighed. “Do you know how I felt when everyone we know was sending me those pictures? Sure, they weren’t exactly bad but still… do you understand how that made me feel? I was so embarrassed Matt! Embarrassed that first of all, you were out doing god knows what while you’re on a trip for work and secondly, that everyone seemed to know about it”

“I know… fuck! I’m so sorry, I know it was shitty and I wish I could’ve told you before those pictures came out but I seriously didn’t think it was a big deal. Those girls… they just came over and they weren’t even there for five minutes, I swear!”

“I just feel betrayed. Maybe I’m being dramatic, I don’t know. I just don’t like it, I hate how I feel about you right now and I hate that I can’t stop picture you in that club with those girls” You thought you had figured out how you felt back in your bedroom but suddenly, talking to Matt has brought even more feelings up for you and now you’re stuck trying to work through them in front of him.

“Tell me what to do and I’ll do it” He looked up at you and your heart sunk at the sight of him. He looked absolutely wrecked. “I swear, I’ll do anything. I can’t lose you”

You knew he was looking for an answer but you weren’t sure what to say. “I don’t want you to have to do something for me to stay”

“Then what do you want!” He raised his voice and you shrunk back. “I’m sorry” He ran his hands over his face.

“No, I deserve it” You were being unfair, you knew that. “I just want to go back to normal, I want to be okay with you going out to bars when I’m not there because I’m being ridiculous right now and if you say nothing happened, I want to believe you”

“You’re not being ridiculous” He said quietly.

“Yes I am!” You groaned. “And you shouldn’t have to try and make me feel better when I’m being crazy”

“Stop” Matthew reached for your hands hesitantly, taking one in both of his. “You saw a picture of me in a bar with a group of girls with no context, you didn’t know what was happening. You have every right to freak out”

You could feel tears falling from your eyes which made you want to laugh. “You… you are too understanding, Matthew Tkachuk”

He smiled softly. You took a deep breath in attempts to focus your thoughts.

“I don’t want to leave”

“Good” He affirmed.

“I trust that nothing happened. I trust you” You felt vulnerable just saying it, like he could use it to his advantage somehow, as if he would ever do that.

“Thank you” He said cautiously. “I love you and I promise, if anything did happen, I would have told you” You believed him. It’s not like he’s ever given you a reason not to.

“I love you Matt, so much and I’m sorry that I flipped out” You sincerely apologized but he just shook his head.

“You always have every right to freak out on me okay? I know I might mess up on dumb stuff like forgetting anniversaries or something but I promise you, I would never do anything to jeopardize our relationship”

“I know” You nodded, pressing your forehead against his as he leaned in. “Thank you”

He chuckled. “For what?”

“For understanding. For not letting me leave. For being the worlds greatest boyfriend to a crazy lady. Pick one” You say and he laughs.

“I’m lucky to call you my crazy lady”

[hockey-fics]

Me or Him ~ Matthew Tkachuk 

Summary: Your friendship with Matt becomes a point of contention in your relationship, and perhaps for very valid reasons. 

Length: ~3,900 words 

A/N: I completely forgot I wrote this like a couple months ago and thought it wasn’t good enough to post. But I’ve had a couple drinks tonight and my standards for myself aren’t as high so I’ll post it now. 

“I have to head out now,” Adam tells you, his hand on your lower back as you stand at the kitchen finishing up the dishes from breakfast. Turning on the tap you stick your soapy hands under it, wincing slightly at the temperature of the water. Giving your hands a quick shake the burning subsides before you wipe them dry on the dish towel. 

Pivoting back to face Adam you lean up, giving him a quick peck on the lips. “Have a good day at work.”

Adam kisses you back before pulling you into a hug, leaning down to be at your height. His prickly stubble rubs against your bare shoulder and you pull away before you can even stop yourself. He was an incredible boyfriend, he really was. But over the last couple months you found yourself becoming more and more annoyed with him. Every little thing he did seemed to rub you the wrong way. 

Adam sighs noticeably but you choose to ignore it. “Can I come back over after work tonight? We could order take-out and watch a movie or maybe like go out on a date night?”

“I’m going to a dinner party with Matt tonight,” you inform him quickly, leaning against the counter and gazing up at Adam. 

“Of course you are,” he mutters under his breath, shaking his head as he stares down at the ground. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” You prod, your fingers clenching around the edge of the counter behind you. Your relationship with Matt had always been a point of contention in the relationship with Adam. But you had always assured Adam that the two of you were just friends. Truly you were just friends, you had never done anything that two friends wouldn’t do. 

But you were close. Really close. Perhaps your relationship was a little more complicated than you had ever admitted even to yourself, let alone to Adam. Hell, you had followed Matt to an entirely different country, though you would never admit he was entirely the reason you moved to Calgary. You managed to convince yourself and everyone in your life that the University of Calgary was the school you were most excited about being accepted into. Obviously you had to admit to everyone that Matt was a big factor in being brave enough to move to a new country, but that wasn’t nearly as shameful as admitting he was the only reason. 

“I’m just getting really sick of it,” Adam tells you, slamming his hand with his car keys onto the counter. The loud smack it makes causes you to flinch but you don’t acknowledge it. 

“Sick of what? Me having friends?” You retort, testing him. 

Adam scoffs at the comment, shaking his head once again. “You know that’s bullshit. Don’t throw that at me to make me seem like the bad guy. I wouldn’t be complaining if you were just going out with some friends. But he’s taking you to a dinner party like you’re his girlfriend.”

“That’s not true, Adam. We’ve been friends since we were like, I don’t know, five. Everyone knows Matt and I are just friends. He just wants to bring someone since everyone else is going to have dates.”

“Are you even hearing yourself right now?” Adam snaps. “He wants you there because he wants to have a date. You’re fucking going on a date with him, Y/N.” 

“I am not!” Your voice is rising now, defensive and angry. “We’re friends, Adam. Stop being such a jealous asshole.”

“You’re not going.” Adam is suddenly calm, a decision already made in his head as he leans against the counter, waiting for your response. 

“What?” You mutter, confusion jolting through your body. “I can do whatever I want. You can’t tell me what I can or can’t do.”

“Then we’re over.”

You’re stunned not only by his words but by how calm he says them, like he had been thinking about giving you this ultimatum for awhile. Like he was just waiting for a reason to bring it up. 

Swallowing heavily you wipe your sweaty palms on your leggings. “You’re breaking up with me because I’m going to dinner party with my friend?”

“I’m breaking up with you because I don’t want to be in a relationship with someone who clearly has feelings for someone else.”

“What does that mean, Adam? I don’t have feelings for Matt.”

“Then pick.”

Shaking your head you stare at him dumbly for a few minutes. “Pick?”

“Me or Matt. Pick.” His voice is so stern and certain you know that he means it. 

“Don’t,” you croak, your eyes blurring with tears as the silence of the apartment begins to feel overwhelming. The lights suddenly too bright and the temperature seeming to rise with every moment. “Don’t make me choose, Adam.”

As you stare at him you can see the hard, stern facade starting to fade. His face softening, eyes glossy with tears. “It shouldn’t be this hard, Y/N.”

“I’m always going to pick him, Adam. If you can’t live with that then-.”

“Then it’s over,” he finishes, nodding slowly. Stepping closer to you he reaches out, pulling you into his arms. Leaning down he presses a gentle kiss to your forehead. “I don’t want to lose you, Y/N. I love you so much. But I can’t come second place to another man in your life.”

Clinging onto him you feel tears slipping from your eyes, dampening his work shirt. “I’m sorry, Adam. I just, I can’t,” you sob, shaking in his arms. “I can’t not have him in my life, I…I l-“

“I know,” Adam whispers, cutting you off. “I’m going to go now… but I still care about you, reach out if you need anything, okay?”

Nodding you reach up to wipe your eyes when he pulls away, noticing your tears left on the blue fabric of his button up. “I’ll um, I’ll gather your stuff up and bring it to your house as soon as I can.”

Adam nods slowly, leaning over to kiss your forehead again. “There’s no rush, don’t stress about it, okay?

“Okay,” you whisper, stumbling back and leaning against the counter again. 

You watch as Adam walks to the front door, noticing the way he stops and turns back to you. “I know you say that he’s just a friend. But maybe you should really think about if you might be hiding some feelings towards him.”

You can’t think of anything more to say to him, can’t think of a response that would be adequate in that moment. So you stay silent till he’s out of your door, till it really hits you that he’s gone and then let a few more tears slide down your cheeks. 

Two and half years. Over. Just like that. 

You try your best to hold yourself together throughout the rest of the day. But multiple times you couldn’t keep your tears in, ending up a sobbing mess on the couch or in your bed or in the shower. But you manage to get through doing your hair and makeup, getting dressed and ready and before you know it Matt is there to pick you up for the dinner party. 

You had thought about telling him a few times, thought about cancelling. But you hated not following through with plans and you knew Matt would ask questions that would only cause more tears. So you kept the breakup to yourself. 

“You look nice,” Matt tells you as you get into the passenger’s seat of his car, pulling on your seatbelt.

“Thank you.” Your voice is quiet, deflated. You can tell that Matt notices but he chooses not to ask questions about it. 

“How was your day?” 

Turning your attention from the road you look over at him. “Fine. Yours?”

“Good,” he replies, glancing over at you. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” you assure him, doing your best to sound chipper and like your normal happy self. 

Mostly you didn’t want to ruin the night for him, but you were also scared that you might not even be able to get the words out of your mouth. You had rarely told Matt about any of your relationship issues. Not because you were trying to hide the issues, you were trying to hide the fact that he was almost always the cause of those issues. So you know what Matt’s perception of Adam was, that he was perfect for you. 

The dinner goes by with relative ease. You partake in small talk over a glass of dry red wine that you pretended to enjoy. You pick at the meal in front of you, your appetite seemingly missing as thoughts of the day threatened to spill into the forefront of your mind. When the conversation shifted towards you or Matt you forced a smile on your face, blinking away the fog of thoughts that would settle on you anytime you let your attention drop. 

But by the time the night was over you felt exhausted, in every way you could think. Mentally, emotionally, and even physically. You were simply drained. 

“You’ve been pretty quiet all evening,” Matt comments from the driver’s side of the car. 

“Just been a long day,” you mutter in reply, picking at a hangnail on your thumb.

Matt glances over, just long enough to notice your deflated appearance. “So are you going to tell me what’s going on or am I just going to have to figure it out myself? And don’t even try to tell me nothing is wrong, we’ve been friends for too long for me not to know something is wrong.”

Inhaling deeply you focus on the windshield, watching a few droplet of rain begin to splatter across it. “Adam and I broke up,” you admit, swallowing heavily. “Or, uh, he broke up with me, I guess.”

“What? When?” Matt stammers and you can tell he’s looking at you a little longer than he should while driving but you don’t dare look over at him as your eyes gloss over with tears. 

“This morning,” you whisper, bringing your hands to your cheeks to wipe away the tears that had slipped from your eyes.

“Why? What happened? And why didn’t you tell me? We didn’t have to go tonight, fuck, I’m sorry, I wish I knew. I feel like such a dick now.”

“No, Matt, don’t,” you state quickly, turning your head to look at him. “Don’t feel bad, you didn’t know. I wanted to go tonight, I didn’t want to ruin it for you, I don’t know. I just didn’t think it was the right time to tell you.”

“You could never ruin anything for me,” Matt assures you, turning into the parking lot of your apartment complex. “Can I come up for a bit?”

Sniffling quietly you nod, “yeah, I’d like that.”

“Can you give me like twenty minutes? I just have to run and do something.”

Nodding slowly you push open the car door, stepping out into the drizzly evening air. “Yeah, uh, I guess. What are you doing?” You feel your heart sink slightly as your mind races through all the things he could possibly be needing to do. Things he couldn’t do with you around. Was he supposed to be meeting up with someone else tonight? Was he still going to see her? And why did that thought make you feel so sick?

“Just have to go do something, I won’t be too long.”

Blinking quickly you fight back the tears in your eyes. “Okay, I’ll um, I’ll see you soon.” Closing the door you hurry into the lobby of your apartment before the rain had drenched you too badly. 

Up in your apartment you’re hit with the silence, the stillness. It felt different at night. Adam was almost always there, or you were at his place. You couldn’t remember the last time you were alone at night. Shrugging your jacket off you hang it up on one of the hooks by the door that Adam had put up for you after you bought it and left it leaning against the wall for almost a month. 

Your heels come off next before you venture into the quiet apartment, finding yourself in the kitchen for no apparent reason. You simply didn’t know what to do with your time till Matt showed up, a sense of confusion deep inside of you. 

It doesn’t take long before you’re buzzing Matt back into your apartment and opening the door for him. In his hands he has a bottle of wine and a plastic grocery bag. “I bought wine and ice cream and those weird thin pretzels you love so much for some reason.”

“What? Why? This is why you left?” You stammer, giggling softly with a layer of tears in your eyes. 

Matt shrugs, stepping into your apartment and kicking off his shoes. “I feel like I saw the wine and ice cream thing in movies before,” Matt chuckles, walking into your kitchen to set the items down. “Come here.” Opening his arms Matt pulls you into a hug, his hand running up and down your back gently. “How are you feeling, like really?”

Wrapping your arms around him you hold back another round of tears. “I’m okay.” You weren’t sure if it was a lie. You weren’t really sure how you were feeling. How you were supposed to be feeling. 

“So, what happened? I thought things were really good with you two.”

Pulling away you reach over, grabbing the bottle of wine from the counter. “This seems like more fun than talking about it.” Pulling two wine glasses from the cupboard you pour some of the pale yellow liquid into them, handing one to Matt before motioning for him to follow you into the living room. 

“You don’t think you maybe should talk about it?” Matt enquires, sitting down on the couch beside you. “You two were together for a long time, I don’t want you to just like…keep everything inside.”

“I’m fine, Matt. I really am,” you croak. Bringing the glass to your lips you take a large sip. “Things weren’t actually as perfect as I made it out to seem. We had issues, nothing major, but I don’t know…it had to happen, I guess.”

“What does that mean? It had to happen?”

Taking another large sip you glance up at the ceiling before shaking your head. “He just…he gave me an ultimatum and I couldn’t do what he was asking of me so he ended it.”

“What was the ultimatum?”

“I don’t want to talk about it, it’s not that big of a deal.” Before you know it your glass of wine is empty and you’re heading to the kitchen for more. 

“You don’t want to maybe slow down with the wine?” Matt says with chuckle but you can tell it’s not as much of a joke as he’s insinuating. 

“Matt, I’m grieving,” you proclaim dramatically, giggling as you pour another glass before returning to the couch. “Honestly though, I’m kind of tired of talking about it…about him.”

“We just started talking about it, Y/N.”

“So? Why does it matter how long we’ve been talking about it? I’m still tired of it.”

Matt takes a sip of his wine, nodding slowly. “Okay,” Matt mutters. “Do you want to watch something?”

Grabbing the remote you turn the television on, immediately finding Brooklyn Nine-Nine on Netflix. You didn’t want to go through your normal ‘what should we watch?’ routine with Matt and a comedy seemed like a good idea. 

After another refill of wine you return to the couch, scrolling through your phone for a few minutes before you turn your attention back to Matt. “I was thinking maybe I should get a dog…or a cat, or something.”

“Something else like what? A fish?”

“I don’t know, fish are kinda cool,” you giggle, bringing your wine to your lips again. 

“I can’t picture you as a fish person.”

Laughing you look over at Matt, eyebrows furled. “Is that like a good thing? Or a bad thing? I can’t tell.”

“I don’t know, it’s just a thing, I guess.”

Giggling you gulp back the rest of your glass of wine. 

Matt reaches over and grabs the empty glass from you with a chuckle. “You’re seriously going to regret this in the morning if you don’t slow down.”

Laughing you reach over, plucking the glass back from him. Your body is leaned over his, face to face with him now. “I don’t have any plans tomorrow anymore anyway. Saturday brunch dates with Adam aren’t going to be happening anymore so why shouldn’t I keep this up?”

“Okay,” Matt says quietly, his eyes softening. “It’s okay if you’re upset about this, you know that right?” You feel his hand land on your side, a tingly feeling spreading through the rest of your body. 

Your eyes flick down to his lips and before you even have a chance to think through what you’re about to do you’re pressing your lips to his. Slotting one of your knees between his legs you lean even closer, lips moving frantically with his. 

A couple moments later Matt pulls away, breathing heavy. “Y/N,” he whispers, eyes filled with confusion and concern. “What…what was that?”

“You, um, you didn’t like it?” You whisper, your mind cloudy.

“I, I mean, yeah, I did. I do. Fuck, Y/N. I just…you just broke up with your boyfriend. You’re drunk. I don’t know what you want me to say right now.”

“Tell me you love me, Matt,” you whisper, pleading eyes staring into his. 

“I can’t.”

Sniffling you lean back a little, tears welling up in your eyes once again. “Because you don’t?”

“Because twenty four hours ago you were telling some other guy you loved him. I don’t know what this is. You’re drunk and I think you’re confused and sad and-“

“I’m not confused Matt, I’m so far from fucking confused. Just kiss me, Matt. Please just kiss me.”

“No,” Matt snaps. “I’m not going to be your rebound, you’re like my best friend. I’m not going to fuck that up because you’re upset that your boyfriend left you.”

“This isn’t because I’m upset about Adam,” you plead, fingers curling around the soft fabric of Matt’s t-shirt. 

“Then what..what’s going on?”

“Do you want to know why we broke up, Matt? Do you really want to know?”

Matt stares at you silently for a moment, perplexed. “Yeah, of course.”

“Because I’m in love with you, Matt,” you state without hesitation, the alcohol taking away your fear. “Not that I ever told him that, but he knew. He told me I had to pick…him, or you. And it was always going to be you, Matt. It always will be.”

“I-,” Matt begins, his voice hoarse and nervous. “You’re just drunk, Y/N.”

Scoffing you climb off the couch, away from him. “You think I would just make that up? For what? That’s so fucking pathetic. Being in love with my childhood best friend…so much so that my boyfriend dumps me over it.”

“It’s not pathetic,” Matt replies, getting off the couch and walking over to you. His hands find yours and he tugs you into his body, warm arms wrapping around you. “I didn’t know…I didn’t know that you felt that way about me.”

“Just get off me, I don’t want your pity,” you mumble into his chest, making no move to back away from him. 

“It’s not pity,” Matt whispers, not so much as loosening his grip on you. “Why would you even think that?”

“Because it’s pathetic that I’m so in love with you, that I have been for so long…that I don’t think I ever won’t be in love with you. And I just have to live with just being your friend.”

Matt’s hand rests on the back of your head, holding you tight against him while his other is wrapped around your waist. “You don’t have to.”

Sniffling you wriggle your way free from his grasp, vision blurry and eyes stinging as you gaze up at him. “What do you mean?”

Matt sighs, eyes flicking nervously around the room. “We should talk about this in the morning.” 

“I need to know what that means, Matt.” Your voice is hoarse and barely above a whisper as your tears begin to dry up, your vision slowly becoming clearer. 

“I’ve had feelings for you for years.”

Shaking your head you take a step back, feeling defensive. What if he was just saying this to make you feel better? What if he was just lying to you? “What?…Why…why did you never say anything then?”

“Why didn’t you?” Matt exclaims. Taking a step closer he reaches over, hands grasping around your biceps. “You were in a fucking relationship, Y/N. Why would I say anything? I never had a chance, you were in love with some guy who seemed so perfect for you. And you don’t know…you don’t know how bad it hurt to watch you with him. But I couldn’t say anything, couldn’t do something to damage your relationship and I couldn’t lose you so I didn’t say anything but don’t think that I didn’t want to. Fuck, I’ve wanted to tell you so many time. I don’t even know how you didn’t know.”

You take a deep breath, starting up at Matt wide-eyed. You were pretty certain you had never heard him like this, rambling on about feelings and emotion with such intensity that you found yourself holding your breath. “I…I,” you stammer, shaking your head. “You had all those years, as teenagers, and you never said anything.”

“You didn’t either,” Matt reasons. “But I didn’t know back then. I didn’t know that my feelings were this serious…this real. I thought, you know, you’re so fucking hot. Everyone would think that. I was worried that maybe I was just attracted to you. You were, are, one of my best friends and I didn’t want to ruin that if I was just confused about my feelings. But then we got older and I realized I really was in love with you and then you got into a relationship and I honestly thought it wouldn’t last. Not because Adam wasn’t a good guy, I just thought, you came all the way from St. Louis and that had to mean something. But every fucking month that went by and you were getting more and more serious with him and I didn’t know what to do other than accept we would always just be friends. And-“

“Matt,” you exclaim, cutting him off. “Take a breath,” you whisper, throwing your arms around his shoulders. “We have plenty of time to talk about it in the future, can you please just kiss me right now because I’ve spent my whole life thinking about kissing you.”

Matt lets out a relieved breath of laughter. “Sorry, yeah, yes, of course.” Leaning down he presses his lips to yours and the tingle it sends through your body is electric. Your stomach fills with butterflies and you press your body closer to Matt’s craving his touch in a way that you couldn’t describe, in a way that was so full of love and lust and every feeling you could possibly have for the boy you had been secretly pining after for years.  

[swissboyhisch]

All-Star Love

Pairing: Matthew Tkachuck x Lemiuex!Reader

Summary: The NHL All Star weekend is always fun. But bring in a romance... Then that's when it becomes interesting.

Word Count: 1742

Warnings: None I think. Please tell me if I'm wrong.

A/N: This comes from a fanific I've written myself. I adjusted it for this but I loved this idea/scene.

THE MASTERLIST JOIN THE TAGLIST HOCKEY DISCORD

All-Star weekend 2020. This year it was being held in St. Louis. You had arrived on the Pittsburgh plane with Sidney Crosby, Kris Letang and Tristan Jarry since you were currently working with the team. Despite being Lemiuex’s child, you had earned yourself a position as an assistant coach at such a young age. You grew up playing the game. Now you were also the captain of the Canadian Women’s team. 

The last few years, you had attended the games alongside Sidney, who was an older brother after he lived with you and your family after he was drafted in 2005. It was a staple weekend in the season schedule. You had the chance to see all the friends and players you were close with and get to have some fun. Often you could even find yourself doing media stuff. 

This year the NHL had introduced the Elite Women’s 3 on 3. You were the youngest on the Canadian team by 5 years. They also have allowed the women on the teams to compete in the skills competitions. You had been placed into the Shooting Stars event. This meant that you were competing against your boyfriend, Matt, and his brother, Brady. Others in the skills competition include Mitch Marner, Patrick Kane, Tyler Seguin, David Perron, Hillary Knight, Danid Pastrnak and Ryan O’Reilly. 

Right now you were dressed in a pair of jeans and your team jersey. Standing in line waiting to be called to the stage where you’d be shooting from. With Mitch, Matt and Brady in front of you, the four of you were chatting and laughing. Each of you were excited to shoot off the platform. 

“Now your Gatorade Shooting Stars… from your St. Louis Blues, number 57, David Perron!”

The arena came to life, all cheering on one of the home team players. Perron, with his son in his arms, made his way up the stairs from ice levels. Handing out beanies and high fiving the fans as he went up to the platform.

“From the Toronto Maple Leafs, number 16, Mitch Marner.” 

Mitch followed Perron up the steps. Handing out hats as he went. Matt stepped forward to the bottom of the stars, looking up at all the fans. He had a hand on your lower back. Brady had let your stand next to your boyfriend whilst you three waited.

“From the Calgary Flames, number 19, Matthew Tkachuk.” Matt follows Mitch up. “From the Ottawa Senators, number 7, Brady Tkachuk.”

“The Canadian Women’s All Star, number 11, (Y/N) Lemieux.”

As you walked up the many stairs, you handed out rolled up t-shirts to fans. It was weird to have this many cameras in your face though. If you were honest, the walk up to the platform looked a lot shorter from the bottom. Especially the amount of stairs you had to climb. You reached the platform and waited for the rest of the players to join herself,Matt, Brady, Mitch and Perron. When everyone had gotten there, it went straight into the competition. First to shoot was Perron. He scored a total of 14 points. Mitch was next on the platform. He scored an awesome 22 points.

“Our next shooter, Matthew Tkachuk,” Nick started. “Your brother Brady is following you so we thought, hey, why not get one more Tkachuk up here. Why not bring up your Dad. Give it up St. Louis, for all-star Kieth Tkachuk!”

Yourself and Brady grin, tapping your sticks as you watched Keith join Matt on the platform, an arm around his shoulder with a wide smile on his face. Nick motioned for Brady to join them as well. You decided to give him a light shove as a joke.

“You should be up here as well,” Brady commented as he joined his brother and father.

You laughed at Brady’s comment. Sending a wink to Matt as well who had the biggest smile on his face.

Keith turned to face you, giving you a joking look, “I think we’re missing someone up here.”

“I ain’t no Tkachuck,” You reply. “Enjoy the moment, big guy.”

Matt stepped forward from where he was standing, holding his hand out for you. “Well, maybe we should change that, hey?”

“What?”

Keith, Brady and Nick stepped back from the platform and Matt grabbed your hand, pulling you to the centre of the platform they were standing on. Your hands flew to your mouth as you watched Matt slowly kneel to one knee and open a ring box. In the box sat the most perfect engagement ring you had ever seen.

“No way,” you breathed, looking at Matt who had the biggest smile on his face.

“You’ve been my best friend since we met all those years ago right here in this very arena. When little (Y/N) bumped into me as she ran to get away from her dad. You’ve been considered part of this family since then but I think I need to make it official, make sure you don’t stand out too much with that last name. Will you do me the greatest honour of changing your last name from Lemieux to Tkachuk?”

You nodded, too shocked to answer in words. The arena roared to life when Matt stood up and kissed you. He pulled the ring out of the box as you dropped your gloves. You cried as Matt slid the ring on your finger. Once he had sealed the deal, you lunged at him, wrapping your arms around his shoulders excitedly.

The players around them and on the bench, as well as the whole arena, were screaming and cheering. Mitch and Brady made sure they were heard over everyone else. 

“I can’t believe you,” You laughed as you pulled away from Matt. Brady was the first to hug you congratulations. He had the biggest grin as well. The smile gave him away. “You knew!”

“Of course I did,” Brady chuckles, “I helped choose the ring.”

Brady was interrupted when Keith pulled you into a hug. “I think you should just keep your last name, it’s more recognisable.”

“Tkachuk is better, that's for sure.”

Nick soon joined the happy group. You were tucked into Matt’s side like usual. Nick held his hand out to Matt who shook it happily before handing Matt a new jersey. It was a grey All-Star Canadian jersey like you were wearing. You grabbed it from Matt, checking the back which now had Tkachuk on it.

“Oh my god,” You grinned, pulling off your current jersey for the new one.

“Hey, have a look at the photo up on the board you guys.” There was a photo of Keith kneeling by the bench in front of a young Brady, Matt and yourself. You had attended the weekend with her father and hung out with the boys. One of the rare times you got to see the Tkachuk brothers as a kid. “How exciting is it to be on this platform being here, history in the making, with your sons and soon to be in-law?”

“I’m so proud of these guys,” Keith stated, smiling at you three. “They’ve earned being here. Matt and Brady grew up here, watched me play here. I mean, Matt met (Y/N) just outside the home change rooms in this arena.” At that, there was a picture of Matt, Brady and Taryn, the youngest Tkachuk, standing with Keith now on the screen.  “I love these guys. I know they love the Blues deep down.”

“Oh, we’re excited to have you here. 18000 people wanna know, how many pucks can Tkachuk chuck, chuck? So why don’t you have a go at this.” Keith took Matt’s stick from him as the three young adults stepped back. “Come on, Keith Tkachuk everybody!”

Keith shot the puck, nearly getting it in the 10 pointer net. “Not a lot of love for that arch there Tkachuk,” You chirped as he turned to give Matt his stick back.

He hugged the three of you before Matt stepped up to the platform. But only after a kiss from you. Keith’s arm wrapped around your shoulder as they watched Matt drop his gloves.

“How characteristic…” You giggles, stopping when he pulls off his Calgary jersey to reveal an old St. Louis Cardinals jersey.

“Who’d he fight?” Keith laughed. “He won’t touch you.”

“He’ll fight me,” Brady mumbled from beside you.

The three of you chuckled as you watched Matt take his first shot. As he took his next few shots, you listened to Brady and Keith chirp your boyfriend, well now Fiance. Matt ended up with 24, getting a 10 on his last one.

“Look at you go,” You smiled, pecking Matt when he switched spots with Brady. 

Brady stepped up to the plate. Matt pulled from under his dad’s arm into his. Having you stand in front of him with his arms around you. When Brady took his first shot, Matt laughed at the fact his brother didn’t do anything special as a tribute to their hometown. 

“Next up we have the last of the three musketeers.”

You stepped onto the platform, with a good luck kiss from Matthew. You had 7 shots to hit the targets laid out on the ice below. With the first shot you hit a 5. After your 6 other shots, you came to a total of 24 as well. Tie with Matthew. After everyone else had taken their shot, it was only Matthew and yourself that had the highest score. No-one had outshot you two. 

“Since you both scored an amazing 24 points, we go to a sudden death shootout. One shot. Highest score wins.”

Matt shot first, missing the arch but a hair. You shot next. The puck went flying over the arch. Actually hitting Jarry who was chilling at the end of the end with some of the other goalies. 

“Injure your goalie, why don’t ya?” Matt chirps as he steps up once again. 

Round two. Matt shoots and hits the 5 points. Only way for you to beat that was to score the same or hit the arch for 10 points. You took a moment before finally shooting the puck. It went straight into the arch. You grin, cheering as you turn to where Matt was standing.

“Better luck next time Tkachuk!”

He smiled, coming up to congratulate you. He pressed a kiss to your lips. “Next time, you’ll be a Tkachuk as well.”

TAG LIST:

@findapenny @mp0625 @hischierhaze @11zegras @lvrzegras @francesfarhadi @cixrosie @daisysthings

[hockeyboysimagines]

All good boys go to Heaven, but Bad Boys bring Heaven to you.

Deleted Scenes

If you haven’t read the full story, please do before you read this otherwise it won’t make any sense! Reasons for exclusion are in Pink.

Thanks for reading!!

*These are in no particular order*

There’s no real reason this wasn’t included. But basically I had too much material and this felt like I was just harping on Hallie being upset but not upset about Matthew being a dumbass. So it didn’t seem like it was needed.

“Don’t.” Hallie said from behind a menu.

“What?”

“You know what.” She peered over the top to find Carly staring pointedly at her.

“I didn’t say-“

“You didn’t have to. I know what your thinking.”

“What are you psychic now?”

“No your just incredibly transparent is all. I’m not talking about this.”

“Well. I am.” Carly set her menu down and leaned forward “I’m not saying you should or shouldn’t go out with him, but I think you should just talk to him.”

“About?”

“The other night.”

“That’s done and over with and besides I really don’t care.”

“If you didn’t care you wouldn’t have gotten so upset.”

Hallie was quiet.

She did care. Sure he’d hurt her feelings by doing what he did with Allie, but the real reason she’d left the bar and cried in the shower was because it hurt to know that he could so easily do that when he was angry at her instead of trying to fix it.

It was partially her fault, and she could recognize it now even if she couldn’t say it out loud, but she thought maybe she meant a little more to him than that.

But as usual she was wrong.

And any trust she had in him went out the window.

“Can we just drop it? I don’t wanna think About it anymore okay? I was drunk and emotional and I’m never going to let it happen again.”

*********

This just didn’t fit anywhere really, plus again like some of my other stories I had too much material and this didn’t fit in any of the other ones either. I didn’t want to bring Johnny into any of their drama either.

“What’s your problem.” Hallie asked Matthew as he strolled ahead of her. Usually he walked with her after games no matter the result, but tonight all she’d gotten was a dirty look and he’d been ignoring her since.

“No problem.” He said curtly still not looking at her.

“Yeah I’m not buying it. So what’s your-“

“You and Johnny looked pretty cozy in the lounge.” He finally said. His voice was clouded with disdain.

Hallie frowned “What? What are you talking about?”

“Don’t give the act Hallie okay?”

“First of all, Johnny is my friend. My friend that YOU introduced me to. And second all of there was nothing ‘cozy’.” She said air quoting “about it. He was trying-“

“I don’t care okay. I’m tired and I don’t wanna talk about it.”

“You brought it up, and we’re talking about it.”

“We’re not. And if you think we are then you can find your own way home.”

Without another word she turned on her heel and walked back inside the arena, presumably to call an Uber or find Carly who was still inside.

He was so mad he didn’t even try to chase her, instead chucking his bag in the car and angrily starting it before backing out of the spot and exiting the garage. He drove for a while, angry thoughts clouding his brain.

He’d seen her smiling at Johnny, laughing at what was probably a dumb joke that wasn’t even funny. How could she? Why would she? Didn’t she know how he felt about her? Didn’t she care?

But as he turned onto a backroad he realized that she didn’t know how he felt because he didn’t tell her. In fact she probably had no idea. And he really couldn’t blame her. He’d acted like an asshole since he met her. Flirting with girls, drunk calling her in the middle of the night to come get him. Why would she care after all that?

And yet, here she was being so easily convinced by one of teammates to give him another chance. And he was accusing her of messing around, when he had no right to even do that at all.

“Fuck.” He sighed as he pulled a U-turn and headed back towards her apartment. He was, once again, swallowing his pride and apologizing, which is something he was going more of now than ever before.

He hoped she was home as he pulled up next to her car and got out. He glanced up at her window, and saw a faint light coming through the curtain. As he made his way up the steps he felt like each of his legs weighed 100 pounds. He hated that he upset her, and that he was again having to apologize for it.

He reached her door and knocked three times. When there was no answer he knocked harder and called out “Hallie?”

“Go away.”

He sighed and leaned his head against the door “I’m sorry okay? Can we talk?”

“No.”

He knocked again, and then again, and then the knock became a loud bang and she was forced to open the door.

“Are you trying to get me evicted?” She seethed at him. She looked annoyed but she didn’t look angry, which was good because had she been angry there would have been no talking to her.

“If it means you have to come out and talk to me then yes. Can I come in?”

“No you can say what you have to out here.”

He sighed and braced a hand on the doorframe “Look I didn’t mean what I sa-“

“That’s a lie. I didn’t realize I wasn’t allowed to have friends.”

“No I just-“

“I don’t wanna hear it.” She snapped “Johnny was trying to talk me out of never speaking to you again, and you say some shit like that to me? I’m done with this.” She made a move to shut the door but he stopped her and took a step inside.

“Get out-“

“No. I’m not getting out. Look.” He huffed “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I just get so crazy when it comes to you. And yeah I’m a total fucking idiot I get it. I’m sorry for what I said, you know I didn’t mean it.”

“It doesn’t matter if you meant it. You said it. That’s what matters. I mean…” she trailed off, and he saw her lip tremble and her eyes get glassy “Do you really think that of me? That I would do something like that?”

“No Hal of course I don’t. I was just being stupid okay? I think your amazing.”

She didn’t look convinced, but stood there arms folded until he said softly “I’m sorry.”

She looked like she wanted to hit him, and he would have deserved it if she had, but instead she simply said “Okay.”

“So…can we hug it out-just a little bit?” He asked opening his arms with a small smile.

“Don’t push your luck-oof.”

“Get over here!” He cut her off, sweeping her into a tight embrace, and knocking her glasses off her nose in the process. He sighed contentedly and closed his eyes, resting his chin on the top of her head.

“Love you Hal.”

“Yeah…I love you too.”

*************

I kind of just wrote this part because it came to me but then I didn’t really have anywhere to put it so I never added it. I wish I had though.

Hallie jumped when the bathroom door banged open, and wiped the shampoo from her eyes.

“Carly?”

“No it’s me.”

“Matty get out!” She screeched, hands flying to cover all her important parts.

“It’s not like you have anything I haven’t seen and besides this is my bathroom .” She heard some fumbling around and the sink turn on momentarily before she peeked around the curtain.

He was standing, shirtless wearing only boxers, hair everywhere while he brushed his teeth. He turned and smiled at her.

“Morning sunshine!” He said. He acted cool about it but he could just faintly see the outline of her body behind the curtain and the boxers he was wearing became acutely uncomfortable.

“Can’t you brush your teeth in the other bathroom?”

“How would I brush my teeth if all my stuff is in here?”

“You could take it and leave.”

“Nah. I like this sink better. And besides Noah and Carly are both in there which means I’m not getting within 10 feet of that door.”

She frowned and slowly moved back behind the curtain. He was quiet for a few seconds before he spit and do spoke again.

“So what’s your plans for the day?”

“Matthew I’m not having a conversation with you while-“

“Me? Nothing much. Lets get lunch later yeah?”

She held back a small laugh and turned it into a cough but heard it anyways “Okay fine we’ll go to lunch. Are you done brushing your teeth?”

She poked her head out to find his toothbrush gone but his face covered in shaving cream now. He turned to her and smiled, razor in his hand.

“Well isn’t this just so domestic.”

***********

I didn’t want to include any kind of details about what happened after the sex in the cabin because I didn’t wanna drag that scene out. I probably should have included this but again, I had too much material.

Hallie woke up the next morning and realized to her horror she was asleep next to Matthew, very few items of clothing between them.

Had she done the unthinkable?

Had she had sex with Matthew?

In cabin with all their friends?

Was she high?

The answer to all of those questions was yes, even maybe the last one. There was no other logical or acceptable answer other than she was high on some serious shit for her to do what she did.

She closed her eyes and let out a long breath, panic bubbling up in the form of bile. She very slowly but effectively inched out from under him without waking him, and painstakingly cracked the door barely wide enough for her to slip through. The house was quiet, which meant no one was up yet and she bolted to her room, closing the door behind her as a tear slipped over her lower eyelid. And then a laugh. And then more tears.

And then she wiped them away because she heard a door open somewhere in the cabin and knew that their friends would be waking up soon. She wasn’t sure how cool she could play it, especially in front of Carly.

She would definitely know something was up. She took a deep breath and stood, changing before she slowly exited her room, peering into the hallways. She didn’t see anyone, and turned to quietly close her door. When she turned back around, Matthew had materialized from nowhere and she jumped.

“Jesus!” She clutched at her heart and looked up at him.

“Where’d you go this morning?” He asked quietly. He looked a little hurt, and Hallie immediately felt bad.

“I just-I went to my room.”

“Why?” When she didn’t answer he spoke again “You regret it don’t you?” He looked crestfallen and Hallie could have started crying right there just looking at his face.

She lifted a hand up to his chest, placing it over his heart “No. of course I don’t. I just don’t feel like it’s anyone’s business what happened last night. At least not right now. I just wanted to keep it between us. That’s all.”

He smiled at her, placing his hand over hers “Last night was amazing. And I-“ but he stopped and cleared his throat “I just want to make sure you felt that way too.”

“It was. But let’s talk about this some other time okay? When it’s just us.”

“Okay.” He smiled and glanced over his should before he leaned down and gave her the sweetest of kisses that made her weak in the knees.

“Come on.” He said “Let’s start breakfast.”

************

This is part of the drive to the cabin, but I didn’t feel like it was significant to the story so it got cut.

“I’m glad this is funny to you.”

“It’s hilarious.”

She and Matthew had been stuck in traffic for almost 45 minutes and she was getting more annoyed with him as the time went on. She wasn’t sure if it was because she was in love with him or wanted to kill him but either way, it was grinding on her nerves and they were practically raw by now.

If she was being honest she was upset more because she didn’t believe him about what had happened the other night. She wanted to, but she didn’t trust him. Although it felt great to be around him again, her guard was up.

“Hallie listen. About-“

“Don’t. Don’t ruin this. We’re having a nice time together, we don’t have to talk about it anymore.”

He looked a little troubled but nodded “Okay. I am sorry though, for what it’s worth.”

“It’s worth a lot. Thank you.”

***********

I had a whole sequence where they had a big fight after the sex in the cabin and they split up but then I felt like since they spent most of the first chapter arguing, that they deserved to be happy and blissed out for a while. So I took it out.

“You know what I think? I think your afraid.”

She glared at him, eyebrows furrowing “Oh yeah? Of what?”

“I think your afraid of the way I make you feel.”

She swallowed and opened her mouth to speak “How you make me feel? You make me feel like I’m losing my fucking mind!” She screamed hands flying up.

“You know what I mean. You can act like you don’t have feelings for me, like this is just about sex but you know that’s a lie.”

“Oh please.”

“Yeah oh please is right. I’m done with this. I can’t take this back and forth anymore. Do you fucking want me or not? It is not that difficult to decide. But I am done with this happening between us. I can’t do it anymore. It’s fucking killing me Hallie. Please.” He sounded desperate as he stood there in her kitchen, eyes pleading with her.

When she didn’t speak he turned and walked angrily towards the door.

“Wait.” He paused, hand on the doorknob and half turned. She was still in the same spot but her hands were down by her sides now.

“Fine.” She said quietly “I’m afraid. I’m terrified.”

His hand fell from the door “But why?”

“Do you really need to ask that question? You know why.”

“I’m not that guy anymore Hallie and you know it. I mean I’m really trying here, and I’ve never done that for anyone before. I mean can you not see that? Can you not see that I want to be with you?”

She sighed and nodded, eyes closing “I know. And I’m sorry. I’m just so-“

“Scared? I know.” He reached for her, pulling her into a long hug “But please just give me a chance. Trust me. Or at least try. Can you do that?”

She nodded against his chest “I can.”

************

I just didn’t want this part. That’s why it wasn’t included.

Hallie bounced off the sofa when she heard a knock at her door and pulled it open, expecting Matthew.

“Hey you-“ but she came face to face with Carly instead, who looked at her confused.

“Excited to see me?” Carly asked.

“Oh Uhm hey what’s up?”

“I was in the neighborhood and I left my bag and jacket here last week so I figured I’d come pick it up.”

“Oh yeah definitely.” Her eyes swiveled over Carly’s shoulder just in time to see Matthew himself turn the corner and freeze when he saw Carly.

“Uh why don’t you come in quick? I’ll grab your stuff.”

She gave him a look and he quickly disappeared back from wherever he came from. She found her jacket, chatted with Carly for a minute and then walked her out the door, hoping to god Matthew had parked around the corner instead of in the lot. She watched Carly leave, holding her breath until she was gone from the parking lot, before she texted him.

Coast is clear

He came in a a few minutes later, looking grim.

“Damn that was close.” He said pulling her in by the waist.

“I know I thought we were caught.” He kissed her deeply, lips moving against hers feverishly.

“Mmmmmm. I missed you today. Coach was riding me at practice and it wasn’t like I could tell him I was slow because I spent all night riding you.”

“Matthew!” She gasped, as his hands drifted under her shirt, brushing against the underwire of her bra.

“What?”

“How’d you like to get back on?”

He pulled back to look at her “Don’t threaten me with a good time.”

*************

I forgot I even wrote this part, because it wasn’t saved on the original document.

“Where are we going?” Noah asked as he sat in the passenger seat of the Audi.

“The grocery store, and then I need to get new socks.” Matthew leaned back to get his sunglasses from the backseat when he spotted something.

A pair of pink, lacey underwear that belonged to Hallie were lodged between Noah’s seat and the center consul. He swallowed and glanced at Noah, who seemed not to notice, and very slowly plucked them out and dropped them on the floor of the back, before swatting them under Noah’s seat.

He smirked a little, remembering her frantically searching under the seat just that morning when he met her before she had to work.

While sneaking around wasn’t really practical, it was totally hot. But they had gotten careless. Lost underwear, almost getting caught by Carly. Last week they’d been in the shower together while Noah was knocking on her door, to drop off clothing Carly had for Hallie. He supposed they could only keep this going for so long, but he would as long as she’d allow it.

“What are you doing?” Noah asked beginning to turn to him.

“Nothing nosey, Jesus.”

*********

That’s all! I hope you enjoyed this! Let me know what you guys think!

🤍🤍🤍

[thomasschabot]

Ok like a part 2 where matthew finds out that you know

a little shortie guy to wrap everything up 💛

welcome to c's deli :))

Matthew knows it was only a matter of time before you found out. 

He’s been taking back roads and sneaking out past bedtime for too many years for it not to catch up with him. No emotions flare when Brady’s contact photo takes over his screen, indicating a phone call instead of the regular text, and he’s already ushering her out the door and into the car before he accepts the call. 

“Dude, she knows.”

There’s a panic in Brady’s voice that hasn’t been there in all the other times he and Emma have helped cover the tracks of Matthew’s affair. He knows his long-term girlfriend knows he’s been unfaithful for a long time, yet still can’t bring himself to really care. 

“I’m already in the car,” Matthew sighs, pulling out into traffic and going the opposite way so his flashy sports car won’t meet your practical crossover while making the getaway. “She won’t even see us.”

The youngest Tkachuk brother is quiet for a moment before speaking again. “If I were you I’d make sure of it because she’s on the warpath.”

Matthew grunts and hangs up, then goes silent. His other girlfriend knows enough not to speak, familiar to the determination etched on his features from one too many close calls, and Matthew focuses on  getting out of this end of city without being noticed. He knows what roads to take and what parking lots to pull into to evade detection, does so with ease. The car pulls into the apartment complex that’s become his third home over the years, and Matthew’s quiet as doors are opened and closed and keys are placed into locks. 

He waits for you to call, text, show up because you forced the address out of his mom — nothing happens. Nothing at all. It’s radio silence for days, and that’s when Matthew realizes you don’t care about closure, will make it for yourself, and that you’re never coming back. 

place and order here x

[tkachuckycheese]

on the line

summary: when the flames season comes to an end, you’re confronted with the emotions of your break-up with matthew, in more ways than one. 

word count: 1.7k

warnings: kinda angsty, mentions of kissing 

note: my first fic on hockeyblr, also my first one in years since my 1d fanfic days (lol)!! basically, this is a combo of my emotions from the flames elimination from the playoffs last night AND the potential of matthew having played his last game as a flame........... but let’s not talk more about it. there is maybe a more smutty addition to this but we shall have to seeeee..... let me know your thoughts friends, i would love to hear them!

~

You’re clutching the red jersey so tightly you're certain the seams are coming apart. You might not even be breathing. You sucked in a breath when the overtime goal was scored, and you haven’t been able to let it out quite yet. 

You pace up and down your living room, back and forth, from the couch to the kitchen. You wish you’d gone to the game with the girls, because at least you’d have someone to calm you down. Many of them had asked you to, but you were worried you’d run into him. If you were there now, you would be able to know if he was okay. You could comfort him, tell him it wasn’t his fault and everything was going to be okay. 

On your TV, they show the team giving the fans one last final salute before heading off the ice. He’s the first one down the tunnel, moving so fast and with his head tipped down that the cameras can’t catch him. But you don’t need to see his face to know what it looks like. He left everything on the ice tonight, and this is going to be a big deal for him. This is soul crushing for him. He’s going to be a fucking mess. Despite what happened between the two of you, your heart breaks for him. 

Is this my fault? 

You hate yourself for even contemplating that question. He made you break up with him. He is responsible for his own failures, and for your broken heart. Maybe karma decided to take this moment to unleash all the hurt and pain you wished on him when you broke up. But if he hadn’t decided your relationship was an “unnecessary distraction”, then there would be no reason for karma to kick his ass. Despite the fact that he had reached out many times since the break-up, asking to talk and saying he missed you, you hadn’t responded. Your emotional capacity had reached its limit, and you were still putting the pieces of yourself that he had broken back together.

You sigh and head into the kitchen, busying yourself with making dinner. Your diet had been shit since the breakup and now that you were trying to get through this instead of wallowing in the pain, you were trying to make a conscious effort. 

A couple hours later, you were on the couch, still trying to convince yourself to change the channel, but you just couldn’t. It was like a train wreck. The highlight reel had played through multiple times already, with the panel discussing each and every hit and miss from the playoff series. The general consensus seemed to be that he, in particular, beared a lot of the responsibility for the team’s loss and playoff elimination. You roll your eyes at the panelists’ opinions of him, while simultaneously wishing you could smack him and hug him at the same time. But you’ll get to do neither because you’re not in his life anymore. 

They’d switched to discussing a different series, and you were about to rewind and watch the highlights again to indulge your heart’s masochistic tendencies when the doorbell rings. Your heart skips and you immediately mute the television. You try to listen to the front door for who it could be, especially since it’s late and you’re not expecting anyone. 

It rings again. 

You stand up and walk gingerly towards the front hall. Your floorboards creak and you flinch–as if the serial killer on the other side of the door can hear it and has started sharpening his machete. 

“Y/N, it’s me.” 

You gasp. Because it can’t be. But when you go on your tiptoes and look through the peephole, there he is. Well, there’s the top of his curly head of hair. He tips his head up for a second and you glimpse those deep grey eyes and full mouth. 

Holy shit. 

You take a deep breath to calm yourself. There’s nothing about this that’s good, you remind your pounding heart as you open the door. He’s slouched over, but as soon as his eyes land on mine, he pulls himself up to almost his full height. Maybe it’s the pain of defeat makes it impossible to get that slump out of his broad shoulders entirely, and really, you can’t fault him for that. 

You fight to hold his gaze. It’s hard because it’s so angry–and desperate. You’ve never seen him look like this, not in the last seven years you’ve known him, not when you broke up, not ever. And because you’re still so completely in love with him, it hurts to look at him. 

“Can I come in?” 

“Matthew, what are you doing here?” you ask without letting him inside. “Don’t you have post-game stuff you need to do?” 

“It’s all done. The series is done. The season is done,” he replies, flicking his eyes to the ground and back up to yours. “Can I please come in?” 

“Why?”

“Because.” 

He’s wearing a pair of training paints and a Flames hoodie. It’s pulled tight across his wide chest. His hair is still wet from the shower. The whole team probably didn’t bother with suits after the game. They probably just wanted to get the fuck out of there. And he came straight to you. 

“Because why?” You countered harshly. 

“Let me in, Y/N.” 

It’s not a question. He doesn’t really ask anyone for anything. He tells them. Matthew’’s always got to be in charge and no one ever denies that. 

You tighten your grip on the door and move to shut it in his face, but he steps right into it. His palm makes a loud smacking sound against the wood, and then he’s pushing. Hard. You lose your grip on the door and it flings open. He steps over the threshold and right up into you. 

Without an ounce of hesitation, Matthew grabs your face roughly in his big hands and forces his mouth over yours. You pound his shoulder with your fist and wedge your hand in between you to try to pry you apart, but you can’t break his hold on you. It’s like a sparrow tangling with an eagle.

His tongue sweeps right into your mouth and you think briefly about biting down on it, but it feels so damn good. You grab the fabric of his hoodie and ball it up in your hand. He starts walking backward, pushing you back into the living room. The side of the archway clips your shoulder, but he keeps pushing. When your legs hit the back of the sofa and you lose your balance, you shove him harder and this time Matthew takes a step away. 

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” You scream. 

“I’m showing you I still care the only way left to show you,” Matthew says, his voice strained and loud. “I’ve tried calling, texting, I’ve used social fucking media and so now here I am. Physically showing you.” 

You storm past him, back into the hall to the open door. He turns to keep his eyes on you but doesn’t move to follow. He may be stunned and angry, but he’s still not going anywhere. You reach out and wrap your hand around the door again. “I told you, I’m no one’s silly little distraction or fling. You don’t get to come in here like a petulant child and just claim me like a consolation ribbon after you lose at hockey.” 

His body is rigid, his shoulders creeping up to his earlobes the longer you rant, getting more and more tense. But you don’t care. You’re not in his life anymore. 

“Y/N, I think about it every single day, how messed up it all was, how much I fucked up. I don’t like myself since you left. I never should have made you leave like that.” 

You try to take a breath, but it’s ragged. “Matthew, you’re just emotional over the end of your season.” 

“I did everything I could for this fucking team.” His voice is low and deep and shaky with rage. 

“Yeah. You did. So let it go,” you reply tersely. “They lost in spite of you, Matthew, not because of you.” 

He doesn’t answer. He walks towards you, his shoulders slumped in defeat again. This time, he stops a polite distance from you and keeps his hands to himself. 

“I just can’t handle the fucking pressure. I can’t carry this team, and I can’t keep putting this brave face on. I don’t know what else to do,” he admits, and you know it’s nothing he’s ever said to anyone else and nothing that he ever will. 

His dark eyes meet yours. They’re so sad they make your heart ache. He takes a few steps towards the door, and as he does, he chokes out, “I am so sorry.” 

As he steps through the door, you put a hand on his shoulder and flick your wrist, causing the door to fly from your hand and slam shut. “You try to control everything and when you can’t, when something knocks you on your ass unexpectedly, you give up or hide. You’re a coward.” 

His chest tightens under your hand. “I was a coward. I’ve been one this entire time, but I’ve been trying to change. I fucked up, but I’m still trying. But I need you. I need you because you make me want to be better.” 

“You need me?” you repeat. God, you wanted to believe it, you really did. You had read his pleading texts, listened to the voicemails, even seen the Instagram post he’d made of a photo of the two of you, simply captioned “Miss this girl.” You’re just so scared to trust him again. You know he can’t do anything else to get you back. You had both walked out on each other, but neither of you had truly moved on. 

It hits you so hard, you let out a shudder. You either have to believe Matthew or you have to let him go. 

And the only thing that terrifies you more than forgiving him is losing him. 

So you take a ragged breath and you whisper, “Prove it.” 

[ilyasorokinn]

Only if you are taking requests currently can i please request, from the kisses prompt list number 41 with matthew tkachuk? Please

LIKE YOU MORE THAN A FRIEND

41. "kisses to shut them up" (from this prompt list)

you and matthew didn't really know what you were. you were friends but you also were a little closer than friends but you couldn't classify yourselves as dating because the formal question was never asked, nor was that conversation ever held.

so, matthew had spent the entirety of off-season wracking his brain, trying to figure out how to broach the subject.

he finally got to calgary for the start of the season and still had no game plan. during practice, everyone could tell he was distracted but left him up to his own devices, hoping whatever it was would pass.

after practice, he went back to his apartment but couldn't stop his rushing mind. so he picked his keys back up and drove to your apartment.

he knocked on your door and waited for you to answer. you opened the door and smiled, "i didn't know you were back."

"yeah you did, no one likes a liar, y/l/n." he teased, pushing past you softly to get into your apartment.

"so, what're you doing here, matt?"

"i don't really know." he admitted, shoving his hands into his pockets as he looked over at you, "for the last 3 months, i've been thinking about what i want to say and how i want to say it, and i still don't really know."

"what are you trying to say?"

"i guess what i'm trying to say it..." he took a breath, "ireallylikeyouasmorethanafriend." he stated in one big breath.

"what?"

"i really like you as more than a friend," he repeated. you stared at him like he grew another head, which he took as a bad sign, "crap!" he muttered, making his way for your door.

you grabbed his arm and stopped him, "look, whatever you're about to say-"

you cut him by crashing your lips on his, effectively shutting him up. you pulled back, taking in his surprised expression. you smiled, "i like you too, as more than a friend."

requests are closed :)

[sorrellegiance]

summer reading challenge progress 91% bitches!!