#Florida panthers imagine

[swissboyhisch]

All-Star Love

Pairing: Matthew Tkachuck x Lemiuex!Reader

Summary: The NHL All Star weekend is always fun. But bring in a romance... Then that's when it becomes interesting.

Word Count: 1742

Warnings: None I think. Please tell me if I'm wrong.

A/N: This comes from a fanific I've written myself. I adjusted it for this but I loved this idea/scene.

THE MASTERLIST JOIN THE TAGLIST HOCKEY DISCORD

All-Star weekend 2020. This year it was being held in St. Louis. You had arrived on the Pittsburgh plane with Sidney Crosby, Kris Letang and Tristan Jarry since you were currently working with the team. Despite being Lemiuex’s child, you had earned yourself a position as an assistant coach at such a young age. You grew up playing the game. Now you were also the captain of the Canadian Women’s team. 

The last few years, you had attended the games alongside Sidney, who was an older brother after he lived with you and your family after he was drafted in 2005. It was a staple weekend in the season schedule. You had the chance to see all the friends and players you were close with and get to have some fun. Often you could even find yourself doing media stuff. 

This year the NHL had introduced the Elite Women’s 3 on 3. You were the youngest on the Canadian team by 5 years. They also have allowed the women on the teams to compete in the skills competitions. You had been placed into the Shooting Stars event. This meant that you were competing against your boyfriend, Matt, and his brother, Brady. Others in the skills competition include Mitch Marner, Patrick Kane, Tyler Seguin, David Perron, Hillary Knight, Danid Pastrnak and Ryan O’Reilly. 

Right now you were dressed in a pair of jeans and your team jersey. Standing in line waiting to be called to the stage where you’d be shooting from. With Mitch, Matt and Brady in front of you, the four of you were chatting and laughing. Each of you were excited to shoot off the platform. 

“Now your Gatorade Shooting Stars… from your St. Louis Blues, number 57, David Perron!”

The arena came to life, all cheering on one of the home team players. Perron, with his son in his arms, made his way up the stairs from ice levels. Handing out beanies and high fiving the fans as he went up to the platform.

“From the Toronto Maple Leafs, number 16, Mitch Marner.” 

Mitch followed Perron up the steps. Handing out hats as he went. Matt stepped forward to the bottom of the stars, looking up at all the fans. He had a hand on your lower back. Brady had let your stand next to your boyfriend whilst you three waited.

“From the Calgary Flames, number 19, Matthew Tkachuk.” Matt follows Mitch up. “From the Ottawa Senators, number 7, Brady Tkachuk.”

“The Canadian Women’s All Star, number 11, (Y/N) Lemieux.”

As you walked up the many stairs, you handed out rolled up t-shirts to fans. It was weird to have this many cameras in your face though. If you were honest, the walk up to the platform looked a lot shorter from the bottom. Especially the amount of stairs you had to climb. You reached the platform and waited for the rest of the players to join herself,Matt, Brady, Mitch and Perron. When everyone had gotten there, it went straight into the competition. First to shoot was Perron. He scored a total of 14 points. Mitch was next on the platform. He scored an awesome 22 points.

“Our next shooter, Matthew Tkachuk,” Nick started. “Your brother Brady is following you so we thought, hey, why not get one more Tkachuk up here. Why not bring up your Dad. Give it up St. Louis, for all-star Kieth Tkachuk!”

Yourself and Brady grin, tapping your sticks as you watched Keith join Matt on the platform, an arm around his shoulder with a wide smile on his face. Nick motioned for Brady to join them as well. You decided to give him a light shove as a joke.

“You should be up here as well,” Brady commented as he joined his brother and father.

You laughed at Brady’s comment. Sending a wink to Matt as well who had the biggest smile on his face.

Keith turned to face you, giving you a joking look, “I think we’re missing someone up here.”

“I ain’t no Tkachuck,” You reply. “Enjoy the moment, big guy.”

Matt stepped forward from where he was standing, holding his hand out for you. “Well, maybe we should change that, hey?”

“What?”

Keith, Brady and Nick stepped back from the platform and Matt grabbed your hand, pulling you to the centre of the platform they were standing on. Your hands flew to your mouth as you watched Matt slowly kneel to one knee and open a ring box. In the box sat the most perfect engagement ring you had ever seen.

“No way,” you breathed, looking at Matt who had the biggest smile on his face.

“You’ve been my best friend since we met all those years ago right here in this very arena. When little (Y/N) bumped into me as she ran to get away from her dad. You’ve been considered part of this family since then but I think I need to make it official, make sure you don’t stand out too much with that last name. Will you do me the greatest honour of changing your last name from Lemieux to Tkachuk?”

You nodded, too shocked to answer in words. The arena roared to life when Matt stood up and kissed you. He pulled the ring out of the box as you dropped your gloves. You cried as Matt slid the ring on your finger. Once he had sealed the deal, you lunged at him, wrapping your arms around his shoulders excitedly.

The players around them and on the bench, as well as the whole arena, were screaming and cheering. Mitch and Brady made sure they were heard over everyone else. 

“I can’t believe you,” You laughed as you pulled away from Matt. Brady was the first to hug you congratulations. He had the biggest grin as well. The smile gave him away. “You knew!”

“Of course I did,” Brady chuckles, “I helped choose the ring.”

Brady was interrupted when Keith pulled you into a hug. “I think you should just keep your last name, it’s more recognisable.”

“Tkachuk is better, that's for sure.”

Nick soon joined the happy group. You were tucked into Matt’s side like usual. Nick held his hand out to Matt who shook it happily before handing Matt a new jersey. It was a grey All-Star Canadian jersey like you were wearing. You grabbed it from Matt, checking the back which now had Tkachuk on it.

“Oh my god,” You grinned, pulling off your current jersey for the new one.

“Hey, have a look at the photo up on the board you guys.” There was a photo of Keith kneeling by the bench in front of a young Brady, Matt and yourself. You had attended the weekend with her father and hung out with the boys. One of the rare times you got to see the Tkachuk brothers as a kid. “How exciting is it to be on this platform being here, history in the making, with your sons and soon to be in-law?”

“I’m so proud of these guys,” Keith stated, smiling at you three. “They’ve earned being here. Matt and Brady grew up here, watched me play here. I mean, Matt met (Y/N) just outside the home change rooms in this arena.” At that, there was a picture of Matt, Brady and Taryn, the youngest Tkachuk, standing with Keith now on the screen.  “I love these guys. I know they love the Blues deep down.”

“Oh, we’re excited to have you here. 18000 people wanna know, how many pucks can Tkachuk chuck, chuck? So why don’t you have a go at this.” Keith took Matt’s stick from him as the three young adults stepped back. “Come on, Keith Tkachuk everybody!”

Keith shot the puck, nearly getting it in the 10 pointer net. “Not a lot of love for that arch there Tkachuk,” You chirped as he turned to give Matt his stick back.

He hugged the three of you before Matt stepped up to the platform. But only after a kiss from you. Keith’s arm wrapped around your shoulder as they watched Matt drop his gloves.

“How characteristic…” You giggles, stopping when he pulls off his Calgary jersey to reveal an old St. Louis Cardinals jersey.

“Who’d he fight?” Keith laughed. “He won’t touch you.”

“He’ll fight me,” Brady mumbled from beside you.

The three of you chuckled as you watched Matt take his first shot. As he took his next few shots, you listened to Brady and Keith chirp your boyfriend, well now Fiance. Matt ended up with 24, getting a 10 on his last one.

“Look at you go,” You smiled, pecking Matt when he switched spots with Brady. 

Brady stepped up to the plate. Matt pulled from under his dad’s arm into his. Having you stand in front of him with his arms around you. When Brady took his first shot, Matt laughed at the fact his brother didn’t do anything special as a tribute to their hometown. 

“Next up we have the last of the three musketeers.”

You stepped onto the platform, with a good luck kiss from Matthew. You had 7 shots to hit the targets laid out on the ice below. With the first shot you hit a 5. After your 6 other shots, you came to a total of 24 as well. Tie with Matthew. After everyone else had taken their shot, it was only Matthew and yourself that had the highest score. No-one had outshot you two. 

“Since you both scored an amazing 24 points, we go to a sudden death shootout. One shot. Highest score wins.”

Matt shot first, missing the arch but a hair. You shot next. The puck went flying over the arch. Actually hitting Jarry who was chilling at the end of the end with some of the other goalies. 

“Injure your goalie, why don’t ya?” Matt chirps as he steps up once again. 

Round two. Matt shoots and hits the 5 points. Only way for you to beat that was to score the same or hit the arch for 10 points. You took a moment before finally shooting the puck. It went straight into the arch. You grin, cheering as you turn to where Matt was standing.

“Better luck next time Tkachuk!”

He smiled, coming up to congratulate you. He pressed a kiss to your lips. “Next time, you’ll be a Tkachuk as well.”

TAG LIST:

@findapenny @mp0625 @hischierhaze @11zegras @lvrzegras @francesfarhadi @cixrosie @daisysthings

[raysofcrosby]

you are in love – m. tkachuk

warning(s): fluff, small angst, insinuation of smut ((barely)) and sadness<333

inspired by: you are in love by taylor swift w a lil twist<33

word count: 33,031

an: hi ya i’ve been MIA on the writing scene for a bit bc just a general plateau of inspiration but oh lookey here, what’s this??? a new fic??? buckle up besties bc i wrote this in literally four hours and crying about 80% of the time bc i was deep in my feels for over a day when i wrote it, so it’s not edited, probs wont even make any sense either but ya enjoy cool!!! also if it doesn't make any sense thats bc a lot of this was edited from what the original version was and i had to add a bunch of filler shit to make it a hockey fic vs just my personal way of letting my emotions out. so again, don't mind it, enjoy the fic, blah blah blah okay bye<333. ((an 2.0: p.s. i wrote this way before ratty's trade, but added it in the end so if the timeline doesn't add up don't attack pls bc like i said...tons of filler was added)) *italics indicate flashbacks*

You never realize how much stuff can fill a one bedroom apartment until the fifth trip to the store to buy more moving boxes because you seriously underestimated just how much you owned. That could arguably be one of the top three worst things when it comes to moving, tied with actually having to pack your stuff and shifting through what to keep and what to give away.

Luckily, Riley had all the time in the world seeing as she had no responsibilities aside from doing exactly what she was doing in this moment- packing up everything and anything she owned and managed to shove into her 744 square foot apartment she’d called home for the last two years. A mixture of memories brought from home and collected during her time here were all over the apartment, and now in a week's time, they needed to be shoved into multiple moving boxes labeled properly so she wouldn’t be going on a wild goose chase when it came to unpacking them again.

Unluckily, she was also the type of person who found herself easily distracted whenever she came across something that she’d either forgotten she’d owned altogether, or that she’d remember misplacing at one point in time and just never found. A coffee mug, and part gag gift that had “don’t speak” on it from her dad who always jokes that she’s unable and not willing to have a conversation before drinking at least half a cup of coffee– it was buried in the middle back of her cabinet with her other mugs. A swear word coloring book meant for her sister that had somehow slipped behind her bedside table. The journal her mom had gifted her her first Christmas into her masters courses when she’d mentioned how she thought about starting journaling every day as one of her New Year's resolutions.

Riley couldn’t remember the last time she had written in it, though she knew she’d kept the habit up for at least a minimum of the entirety of January, so she flipped open the journal, watching the blank pages brush by until she saw the black ink of the pen she’d always used to write in it. And in the top right corner, was the date of her last entry– March 11th.

She didn’t need to read the entry to remember what she’d written in it…but she was already here, with the journal wide open in her hands…what could it hurt to relive the memory she’d written down on that day?

“Hey, so Jacob and Bren have got pretty much everything packed up in the pod,” Claire said, walking into the now empty apartment and stopping by the bar of the kitchen island where Riley had been leaning. “Are you ready to lock it up or is there some stuff you still need to add?”

Riley looked up from the journal, shutting the hardcover journal– the front of it decorated in pink watercolor pastel and a small bouquet of yellow flowers with the phrase “through sun and rain, flowers bloom all the same” written in black cursive, the pink marking ribbon hanging outside of the lined pages instead of marking where she’d last left off like it was supposed to be.

“Um no, no,” she replied, glancing up from the journal and shaking her head as she placed the journal into the box on the counter next to her, folding the flaps properly and locking them in each other before sliding it off of the counter and holding it in her arms. “Just this box here, but I’ve got it.”

Claire nodded and turned to face what had previously been a homey living room, but was now just an empty room full of potential possibilities. “It feels weird to see this place empty again since I still remember Jacob and I helping you move in with Bren, mom and dad two years ago. I guess it’s a little sad too,” she looked at Riley, nudging her with her shoulder. “But I guess I’m proud of you for getting this job, though I will miss having you within instant bugging distance of me.”

“Gee, thanks,” Riley replied, stepping away from the counter. “Come on, let’s go put this in the pod so we can lock it up and call the company to pick it up soon.”

“Tell me that means we can get early dinner too, right? I’m absolutely starving.” Claire huffed, grabbing the keys to the apartment off of the counter and following behind Riley as they left the now empty place she once called home.

“We can,” Riley nodded, stopping just outside the door as she watched Claire lock the apartment door before they started moving down the hall and towards the elevator. “But I have one more thing I need to do before that.”

Claire’s eyebrows furrowed for only a split second before she pursed her lips and nodded. “That’s right, yeah we’ll totally make a stop before dinner. And then after that–”

“St. Louis,” Riley sighed, her thumbs rubbing against the cardboard in her hands as she nodded. “Yeah, bright and early, first flight out of here.” 

“Then you’re Boston bound once Mom and Dad get their trips down memory lane in,”  Claire smiled, looking down at her phone and typing.

For a moment as she followed behind Claire, she looked down at the box, seeing her own writing in black sharpie across one of the flabs– “Miscellaneous Junk – Riles’ room” “Did you write this on the box?”

Claire looked over her shoulder as the elevator doors opened and peered at the box, nodding her head. “Yeah, it’s just a bunch of junk from your desk isn’t it? Nothing really important is in there, just your knick knacks and stuff from your drawers.”

‘Nothing really important’ stung her harder than it probably should have because sure, she’d asked Claire to go through her desk and toss whatever was left into one box, but that was before she’d looked in and seen what was in it. Random stickers, concert lanyards, the gag gift of a gift box of glow in the dark condoms Janelle had given her– so many of the things in there fell under the junk title Claire had given the box…the ‘nothing really important’ category. But not that journal…nothing written on those lined pages was junk, everything in that journal mattered to Riley.

It took everything in her not to reach in and grab the journal from inside the box, but she didn’t want to gain her sister’s attention or want her interest to be piqued on what was within the hardcover gift. So instead, she just readjusted her grip onto the box and thought about all the ways she might be able to sneak it out without anyone noticing before they put the box into the pod, which would be shipped off to Boston, hopefully later tonight.

There were only 69 entries in that journal, there should’ve been at least 184, but the way she’d gotten swept up in life every day after March 11th, writing in that journal had slipped to the very back of her mind. But every moment of those 69 entries and the 114 days after that, all the way up to that moment on July 2nd that felt world ending, to today– July 4th…it all mattered.

DAY 12 – JANUARY 12TH, 2022 [ FIRST MEETING ]

“I have absolutely no right to be here right now,” Riley said, tugging on the top of the bodycon dress Claire had managed to squeeze her into for the night. One that was just one size too small but for some Godforsaken reason had seemed to fit her everywhere but her chest, which Claire called a blessing but she called a girl's gone wild moment waiting to happen.

“You have every right to be here,” she replied, keeping her steady pace as her heels clicked against the pavement while simultaneously digging through her small clutch for her lip gloss.

“In what dimension do I have the right to be crashing a girls night out–” Riley quickened her pace, the heels Claire also pressured her to shove her feet into for the night, almost matching her own as they clicked on the sidewalk. “Where all of the girls in question, except for me, have the same exact thing in common?”

“Which is?”

“You know exactly what it is,” she huffed, finally coming up beside her just as the two of them were met with the bouncer of the club, the bearded man who looked like he walked off of the front cover of a bodybuilding magazine, instantly waving them both through. “You’re literally all dating professional athletes…on the same team…teammates, Claire. That’s what you all have in common.”

Claire rolled her eyes, grabbing her hand as they both entered the crowded club floor and leading her in the direction of where most of her friends were. “I think you’re forgetting one thing, you also know someone here because you’re both in the same masters courses.”

“Fine, I have one thing in common with one person out of what? The twenty that are here?”

“And me, or have you all of a sudden forgotten that you’re a twin? Because if you’re still mad about me stealing your book fair money in elementary school, I think you need to see a therapist.”

Riley pulled her hand from hers, tugging up at the top of her dress again. “We’re not even twins. You’re eleven months older than me–”

“Basically making us twins,” Claire replied, pulling her forward as she came to a stop in front of a small set of stairs that led up to multiple booths. “Fourth one down, move it.”

“It’s a wonder how you ever won the friendliest in the entire class your senior year,” Riley said, sending a playful glare over her shoulder. “If only they knew the real you.”

“You’re my sister, you get both my nice side and my ‘if you take my favorite sweater out of my closet one more time without asking I’ll dump water on your head in the middle of the night to wake you up,’ side,” Claire smiled, keeping her hand on the small of Riley’s back and nuding her ahead. “Besides, you won best smile which is odd because you never smile, you old grouch.”

“Finally you two show up!” Meredith, Johnny Gaudreau’s wife, was the first one to spot them as Claire shoved Riley up to the booth where the familiar faces of the girls who were either married to or dating Flames players that Riley had gotten to know so far, were sitting in.

“Yeah, it took everything in me to convince Ri here to come out with us and to at least put a little effort into her appearance,” Claire said, greeting Meredith with a hug before moving along to greet the rest of the girls who were there.

“Ha ha, very funny, but some of us have school–”

“Oh not the school excuse,” Kelsey, the one girl out of all of them who Riley had one thing in common with, seeing they were both pursuing Masters Degrees at the University of Calgary in the Kinesiology program. “I know for a fact that we have nothing due over the weekend, not even until the end of next week. Take a break for once Riley, you’re mastering the classes, no pun intended.” She smiled, giving Riley a hug.

“See Ri?” Claire smiled over her shoulder before plopping down in a spot Meredith and Annica, who was dating Elias Lindholm, had made between them. “Now relax and have fun. You don’t even have to leave the comfort of this booth if you want.”

“Actually,” Riley replied, giving Claire a sarcastic smile. “I think I might just have some fun and wander down to the bar and get a drink.”

“I’ll come with you actually!” Kylie, who was dating Dillon Dube, chimed in, standing up from the seating.

“Me too!” Kelsey added, standing up. “Plus I wanted to tell you what Oscar’s reaction to that paper we had to turn in last week was. I swear his eyes popped out of his head when I asked him to proofread it.”

Riley laughed, walking back out of the booth as the two followed behind her. “Please, I barely understood what I wrote and I even have all the notes from class.”

The three of them maneuvered their way back down the small set of steps and then back into the crowd of the bar, Kelsey grabbing onto Riley’s hand and then presumably Kylie’s so the three wouldn’t lose one another in the crowd as Riley led them over towards the bar. Thanks to being invited along to some events by Claire, Riley knew most of the WAGs on the team, but the only one she was really on a super friendly basis with, was Kelsey. Kelsey who was born and raised in Calgary and had attended the University of Calgary for her undergraduate degree as well and had been dating Oscar for the last near two years.

The two of them, Kelsey and Riley, hadn’t made their Flames connection until Claire asked Riley if she would tag along with her to brunch with a few other girls, Claire also wanting Riley to ‘stop hiding in your room, you’re young, have fun!’ Kelsey was at brunch, recognized Riley from one of their lectures and the friendship just blossomed into study sessions, coffee trips and Kelsey also having Riley tag along to things.

“Unbelievable,” Kelsey laughed once the three of them managed to grab a space at the crowded bar. “All of the bars in the city and they go here? Knowing we were all coming out tonight?”

“What?” Kylie asked, looking at Riley for help but Riley just shrugged.

Kelsey sighed and rolled her eyes before nodding her head off to their left and then pointing. “All the way at the end of the bar.”

Riley and Kylie both looked over in the direction she was pointing, and instantly the two girls knew what and who she was talking about. There at the end of the bar and of course, all together in a big group, were a few players from the Flames. Riley could see Jacob and Dillon at the bar talking to the bartender and off behind him were Sean, Johnny, Oscar and they were sure more that weren’t in their view.

“If you guys tell me what you want, you’re more than welcome to go over there and chew their asses out a little bit,” Riley smiled, leaning against the bar.

“You don’t mind? Because like Kels said…there are so many bars here,” Kylie said, looking off at the boys.

“Not at all,” Riley replied, waving them off. “As long as you give Jacob a little hell from me for not telling my insane sister to leave me alone tonight.”

Kylie squeezed Riley’s arm as she brushed by and nodded. “We’ll be right back, don’t leave the bar without us so we don’t lose you.”

“And if any creeps sneak up, yell pterodactyl.” Kelsey noddeed, nodding her head. “It’ll scare them off.”

“Pterodactyl, got it,” Riley nodded, watching them walk away before turning back towards the bar and then shaking her head. “Pterodactyl? Where the hell did she get that from?”

The bartender walked over to her, nodding at her. “What can I get you?”

Riley opened her mouth to speak, only to realize that Kelsey and Kylie never told her what they wanted to drink…so she went with a classic. “Can I get three vodka cranberries?”

The bartender nodded and turned away to make the drinks, Riley flipped her phone over and grabbed her card from the card holder she insisted Claire let her borrow since she wasn’t carrying a purse and was stuffed into the dress.

“I hope all of those aren’t for you,” Riley heard someone say as the bartender placed two of the drinks down in front of her. “Cause that’s about three rounds I’ll miss out on buying you a drink.”

She looked to her left to see the familiar face of Matthew, one of Jacob’s teammates. A face that she’s seen obviously on ice for the games she’s attended since her sister started dating Jacob, but also at some of the team parties that Claire’s invited her to or made her tag along as her plus one. “That’s assuming I’d take your offer to let you buy me one, let alone three.”

“Ouch, tough crowd,” he replied, holding his right hand to his chest, right over his heart and rubbing against his gray t-shirt.

“Sorry,” Riley dramatically pouted as she shrugged. “Did I bruise your hockey player ego by turning down your horrible pick up line? Like seriously, does that even work?”

He moved away from the corner of the bar and came up beside her, resting his arms against it. “Who said it was a line? Maybe I was really looking forward to buying you a drink. Plus, maybe I was also sent over here to make sure no creeps are creepy towards you. You know the whole plus one, stay together thing.”

The bartender placed the last drink in front of her and Riley quickly handed over her card before looking at him with a shrug. “Looks like you failed your mission.” The bartender placed her card back down onto the bar in front of her, along with a receipt and a pen. Riley quickly scribbled her signature and a tip before sliding it across the bar and putting her card back into her phone and looking at Matthew. “Both missions actually, cause I just bought my own drink.”

Matthew rolled his eyes before looking at the bartender and nodding his head, holding up two fingers– Riley taking that as the opportunity to grab her drinks and head back towards the booth. “Hey!” She turned around to see Matthew leaning against the bar, nodding at her with a smile. “The night’s still young. That’s plenty of time for me to buy you that drink!”

“Not unless you find someone else to entertain your time and horrible pick up lines,” Riley smiled back, nodding her head for him to look behind him as a girl was just getting ready to tap him on the shoulder– her intentions for him very clear. “Just don’t use that buy you a drink one.” Riley winked and turned back towards where she was walking, carefully making her way back over to the booth where Claire and the rest of the girls were.

“Riles!” Claire cheered, holding up her empty shot glass before putting it back onto the table. “Where are Kels and Kylie?”

“You guys have some bar crashers!” Riley replied, placing the drinks that belonged to Kylie and Kelsey down onto the table, then covering them with one of the napkins that came wrapped around the cup. “Some of the guys are here and they went to go talk to them.”

“Ugh! All of the bars for a girls night out and they choose this one?” Meredith complained, rolling her eyes and finishing off her drink, then standing up. “I need another drink.”

Once she made her way out of the booth with another girl following behind, Claire took that opportunity to slide over next to Riley. “Get the sourpuss look off your face, have fun and relax, Ri!”

“I am, I’m having a ball! Lame pick up line, alcoholic drink and all!” Riley replied, leaning towards Claire so she could hear her.

“Pick up line? Who tried to pick you up?!” Claire smiled, practically beaming at the idea of Riley getting some sort of attention in the romance department. “Come up, point them out!”

“It was just one of Jacob’s teammates, it was nothing serious–”

Claire grabbed onto her arm, gripping it as her smile grew bigger. “Who! Who! You need to tell me who it was right now!”

Riley rolled her eyes, still able to see where Matthew was standing at the bar…the girl who Riley had told him about, standing next to him a little close and the two talking. She pointed out towards the bar and looked at Claire. “Him.”

She watched as Claire’s focus moved all across the bar before landing on where Riley had been pointing. Riley waited for a falter in her sister’s expression, but all stayed the same aside from Claire laughing and shaking her head. “Oh, Matthew? He’s harmless! A flirt, but a harmless one.”

“Clearly since he’s already moved on from wanting to buy me a drink and insisting on that he will,” Riley replied, turning her attention away from Matthew and the girl at the bar. “But how about we try not to shove any potential attractive male down my throat?”

“But that’s no–”

“You want me to let loose and have a good time?” Riley asked, sipping on the straw in her drink as Claire nodded. “Okay, then stop trying to pawn me off to any guy who shows a remote sense of interest.”

Claire rolled her eyes and sipped on a lighter drink that Riley knew was probably a margarita. “Did you at least think he was cute? Matthew?”

Riley sighed. “I’m not into that right now Claire, you know this. I’m not looking for–”

“A relationship, or love, or someone who will drag you out of the house on a Friday night so you can’t sit on your couch and watch One Tree Hill at night,” Claire replied, waving a hand at Riley and brushing her off. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. But appease me just this once…do you think he’s cute?”

Riley looked back over to the bar where she watched Matthew take two beers from the bartender before saying something to the girl and then turning around, leaving her at the bar and walking back towards the group of his teammates. “I mean…yeah, he’s cute–”

“Thank you,” Claire smiled, hugging her sister and then pulling away, clinking her cup against hers. “Now was that too hard?”

“I think I just felt a piece of my soul wither and fall off actually,” Riley smiled, taking another sip of her drink as she looked at her sister.

“Oh stop being an old hag,” Claire laughed, shoving her playfully. “You’re way too young and pretty to be so old and bitter.”

Riley laughed, shaking her head. “You do realize that made no sense, right?”

“What can I say?” Claire smiled, shrugging her shoulders as she took another sip of her drink. “The tequila’s strong.”

DAY 22 – JANUARY 22ND, 2022 [ FIRST "DATE ]

“For the love of everything that is good and holy, why the hell did you and Jacob think tonight would be a great idea for a double date?” Riley sighed, tugging the ends of her thin sweater sleeves over her hands and bunching the material in her fists before crossing her arms. “Hockey games end at an average of what? Ten o’clock? Assuming they don’t go into an overtime and a shootout.”

“Oh hush,” Claire replied, waving her off. “It was an additional half hour, it won’t kill you if you’re not in bed before midnight for one night. Besides, you’re 24 and in the prime of your youth. I think staying out for a night would do you some good.”

“Some of us have homework and class–”

“In two days, Riley. It’s a Saturday night, you have no responsibilities until Monday morning, so stop complaining.” Claire turned away from Riley, looking down towards the locker room door where Jacob and the rest of the players were set to come out of.

Technically, Claire was right. Riley didn’t have any responsibilities until Monday morning and that’s more in part to the fact that she didn’t even have any homework due, that was just something she blurted out the moment Claire asked her earlier in the day if she would come to the game tonight with her. It didn’t take much budging for Riley to say no, after all, she loved Jacob and having grown up in St. Louis, her family often went to Blues games– so she enjoyed the game as well. However, once they got to the arena and Claire spilled about how they would also be going on a double date as well, with Riley being the other participant in the other couple, the slight good mood she had came crumbling down.

Claire refused to tell her who she was being forced to go on a date with, other than it was someone that she knew of and they knew Riley would be the girl he was on a date with. Halfway through the game, only when Riley threatened to call herself an uber home did Claire tell her that the date was actually one of Jacob’s teammates– a teammate who had expressed interest to Jacob about Riley that night they were all out at the same bar, despite it being girls night. Jacob told Claire and apparently the two of them had talked for a few days, Claire even talking to the teammate before finally agreeing that she was willing to set Riley up on a double AND blind date.

Though she was of course more than willing to from the jump, just like she’s been trying to hook her up with any male she thought she was a great fit for ever since high school. And it was all the same– she’d buy into her plan, go on the date, either liking the guy or he would ruin any potential feelings within seconds by saying something super misogynistic or just overall not being her type and then she’d end the night saying bye and going home by herself.

It was actually quite a process and one that Riley's come to love, because sure, while having an occasional guy in her bed for an hour or two was nice, she was never one to want to actually share her bed. Claire says she has commitment issues, but Riley liked to think of it as not bothering to settle down for any amount of time if she knew the guy was just going to waste it.

Which of course, everytime their parents came to visit or they traveled home on Holidays, meant her love life was often the topic of discussion. But that’s what happens when Claire’s basically on her way to an engagement and Brendan, their younger brother, had finally managed to convince his long time best friend Evelyn to date him.

Riley was the black sheep her parents worried about, wondering whether or not they’d ever see her bring a boyfriend home for Christmas, walk down an aisle and eventually grace them with grandchildren.

“Look, there’s Jacob now,” Claire said, standing up straight from leaning against the wall and waving her hand up slightly in the air to catch his attention.

Riley looked up from the dull arena hall floor to see Claire’s boyfriend of a little over a year, Jacob Markstrom, walking over, half expecting to see whichever teammate the two of them decided to hook her up with for the night. Jacob was nice and their parents loved him from the moment they’d accidentally met him leaving Riley and Claire’s shared apartment when they had only been dating for four months. Riley told Claire she was going to the airport to pick up their parents and yet the moment they all walked up to the door, out came strolling the 6’6” goalie in all his Swedish and slightly hungover glory.

And much to Claire’s embarrassment and Riley’s amusement, their parents invited him out to lunch later that day and they fell in love with him. There isn’t a single text or phone call between their parents where they don’t ask how Jacob’s doing and seeing if he wanted to come over for the holiday or any other small, family event.

“Good game babe,” Claire smiled, immediately walking into the blonde’s arms and giving him a hug. “Proud of you for blocking those shots there in the shootout.”

“If only I could’ve blocked more in regulation, then we wouldn’t have needed an overtime or shootout.” Jacob replied, leaning down and kissing her, keeping his arm on the small of her. “But thank you älskling, I appreciate it.”

“Hey future brother-in-law, is there any way you could tell me who this mystery date of mine is?” Riley sighed, letting her arms drop as she stood up straight. “Claire Bear over here wouldn’t even give me a single hint aside from he’s one of your teammates.”

Jacob laughed, nodding his head and looking down at Claire. “I don’t know, I think I’ve been sworn to secrecy too. But he should’ve been right behind me,”

“I didn’t see him,” Claire shook her head, looking back behind them as more of the players started to file out in groups before looking back at Jacob. “He didn’t change his mind, did he?”

Jacob shook his head. “Not that I’m aware of, he was talking about it before the game and asking how the driving situation would work. I didn’t tell him–”

“You know what? No big deal,” Riley smiled, feeling relieved as she waved them off and dug into her purse to grab her phone. “You guys go ahead and go on the date and I’ll order myself an uber and go back to my–”

“Hey sorry I’m late, I was just giving Meredith the number of some party planner my mom knows out in Boston. I guess she wants to surprise Johnny with a party out there this summer for his birthday.”

Riley looked up from her purse to see the all too familiar face of Matthew Tkachuk, only this time he wasn’t wearing a t-shirt and some jeans like he’d been wearing at the bar. This time he was wearing a suit– a nice navy blue one at that– and had a black coat draped over his arm. Riley would be lying if she said he wasn’t cute in normal clothes, but she would be lying even more if she said seeing him dressed up in a suit made him even more attractive. She won’t even think about seeing him in full uniform, mostly because honestly, she spent the entire night barely paying attention to the game and trying to figure out who her mystery date was.

It turns out it was–

“Him?” She asked, looking at Claire. “He’s my date?”

“Uh,” Matthew chimed in, holding up a hand. “I’m kind of right here.”

Claire turned away from her and towards Matthew. “Sorry for my sister, Matt. Ri can be rude sometimes.”

Riley didn’t miss the sharp change in her tone when Claire had called her rude, and maybe she was. But it was her initial reaction and Claire knew about the bump in at the bar because Riley had told her. She’d even laughed about it– “oh Matthew? He’s harmless. A flirt, but a harmless one.”

And yet here Claire was, setting her sister up on a date with the “harmless flirt” she’d talked about only a little over a week ago.

“Sorry,” Riley replied, looking down at her purse again and bringing her phone out of it, checking the time. “Claire, can we get going? It’s getting kind of late.”

“Of course, let’s get going,” Jacob nodded, looking back at her sister before the two started to walk off, leaving just her and Matthew standing there.

“After you,” Matthew said, motioning for her to walk. Riley crossed her arms again close to her chest as she turned around to follow behind Jacob and Claire, Matthew walking beside her. “I’m sorry if you were expecting someone else.”

“What?”

Matthew nodded ahead of them towards Jacob and Claire. “You seemed like you were expecting someone else.”

Riley felt her cheeks begin to heat up as she adjusted her arms. “No, not at all. I mean, I–”

“You literally said ‘him’ and didn’t look pleased,” Matthew replied, his free hand in his pants pocket as he shrugged. “I’m not offended, I’m just apologizing if they told you something different. Jacob told me you knew.”

“I knew about the double date, and Claire only told me about it once we got to the arena and she knew I wouldn’t pay for an uber back to my apartment with the traffic.” Riley replied, looking ahead of them just as Jacob and Claire seemed to be hiding the fact they took a quick glance behind them. “So I’m sorry if I made you feel bad.”

Matthew laughed and the first thing Riley noticed was his smile. He hadn’t smiled at the bar, not a full one– just a smirky smile, which at the time she thought that maybe was his trick into getting girls to think he’d had feelings for them or was interested in them.

He has a really nice smile.

“Trust me, nothing you could say would make me feel bad,” he replied, shrugging his shoulders. “Between the chirps between my brother and sister– hell, my parents too and then the stuff online, I’ve got some pretty thick skin.”

“Oh yeah, professional hockey player, I forgot,” Riley laughed softly, hugging her arms closer to her again as they caught up to Jacob and Claire and stepped into the garage within the Saddledome where players and employees of the team alike, parked.

“Okay so here’s the thing,” Claire said, clasping her hands together and looking up at Jacob before looking back at her and Matthew. “We forgot we promised to facetime into a call to Jacob’s family. His sister’s got some news to share and wanted everyone to be on a call.”

Riley’s jaw dropped as she stared at her sister, who conveniently was avoiding her gaze. “Claire–”

“But it’s still pretty early so you guys feel free to grab some coffee or a drink, hang out and get to know each other. Just because it’s not a double date, doesn’t mean it still can’t be a date,” Claire smiled, finally looking over in her direction only to be greeted with an ‘I know you had this planned all along’ look from her sister. “Matthew, I trust you to get my sister back to her apartment safely? Or you can just take her back to your place–”

“Claire!” Riley spoke through gritted teeth, blinking obviously at her sister who was already dragging Jacob away from them both.

“Text me in the morning! Have a good night!” Claire smiled, waving at the both of them as Jacob followed behind, he too lifted a large arm to wave his hand in the air.

Riley watched helplessly as they got into his car, turning around to face Matthew once she heard the sound of an engine start. “I am…so, so sorry for that.” She scoffed softly, shaking her head in disbelief. “Claire’s pretty straightforward, but I promise I had no idea she was going to do that. You really don’t have to feel obligated to take me home or anything.”

“It’s fine,” Matthew replied, shaking his head as he pulled his hand out of his pocket and holding onto his keys. “I can take you home if you want to go.”

She felt guilty, partly because she was so embarrassed to have been blatantly left there by her sister and the other half because she knew this isn’t what Matthew had signed up for at all. He was expecting a double date, a double date where the girl knew who she was going out with. He didn’t sign up for a surprise double date or to have said double date crash and then be left with possibly no date and to take his stranded date home.

“If it’s not too much?” Riley finally spoke, feeling uncomfortable with her own guilt. “I promise I don’t live too far away. I’m actually only about five minutes away from where Jacob and Claire live if you know it?”

“I know it,” he nodded, motioning again for her to start walking as he walked beside her. “Claire’s quite the host when it comes to team stuff. The Thanksgiving they held at their place this year was pretty fun. Though, you weren’t there I don’t think.”

“That’s right, I forgot she did that,” Riley nodded in reply. “I went home since I didn’t have any classes, but I remember her saying she and a few others were going to do something. But yeah, Claire’s quite the hostess. Life of the party even.”

“She’s something,” Matthew nodded, quickening his pace just a little before coming to a stop by a black Audi SUV and opening the passenger door. “I started the car once we entered the garage, so it should be warmer here.”

“Oh,” Riley was caught off guard. Despite the action itself being bottom of the barrel of what men were expected to do, Riley truly couldn’t remember the last time any date she had, had opened any door for her…not just a car door. “Thank you.”

Matthew just nodded in reply and waited for her to get into the car before he checked to make sure her feet or her purse weren’t hanging out so he could close the door. And though he could’ve taken his time to walk around, she watched him walk around the back of his car with a sort of urgency, not leaving her alone inside for long before he was opening the driver door and ducking into the car.

He fiddled with the radio for a bit before picking up an aux cord and offering it up to her. “You’re more than welcome to have the aux. I’m not all too picky with music.”

“Are you sure?” Riley asked, looking at him to see if she could spot any sign of him changing his mind.

“Absolutely, you can have it,” he said, handing the cord over.

Riley took it from his hand and plugged it into her phone, unlocking it and opening her music library. “Any requests?”

“Just whatever you want to play,” he said, looking away from her as he put his seatbelt on and then put his car into reverse.

She felt nervous sitting there in his car and she didn’t know if it was because she was sitting in the car of someone who was basically a stranger to her, or because of the kind of date setting. It took everything in her not to physically move in her seat to try to get the nerves out, so instead she just endlessly scrolled through her music library, not even picking a song.

“My family and I play this game when it comes to what songs to play, that way there’s not one person who’s picking all the songs,” she said, breaking the silence as she looked at him.

“What’s that?” He asked, sneaking a look at her before maintaining his focus on backing out of his parking spot to eventually straighten up and leave the garage.

“We each took turns picking a letter and a number. Whatever letter someone picks, you’ll scroll down to the number they picked and then that’s the song.”

“Okay, I got it,” Matthew nodded, looking at her as he pulled out of the garage. “B 163.”

Riley stared at him, blinking once or twice. “In what universe would you ever think I have 163 songs that start with the letter B?”

“I don’t know, I just went with a random mix,” he shrugged, looking at her. “So do you?”

“Maybe.” She knew she did. So she just bit back the smile that was trying to reveal her cards and looked back down at her phone, scrolling to the B’s and then starting to count.

Matthew pulled out into the street as she reached 90 and saw she was passing some pretty great songs, and made mental notes of what numbers they were…which was technically cheating, but her brother did it all the time.

158…right? Wait yeah 158…159….160….161….162….Oh no.

This could either go one of two ways– he could hear the song and enjoy it, or he could look at her like she was just a 12-year-old who never grew up and speed the entire way to drop her off at her own apartment, just so he could get her out of the car.

Wait? Isn’t that what she wanted?

Not wasting another moment, she took a deep breath and pressed the song, closing her eyes to prepare for whatever critique Matthew was going to hurl her way.

She looked at him from the corner of her eye as the piano started to play from the speakers, only giving him a second of instrumental before the vocals picked up and giving away just what song was playing.

“We’re soarin’, flyin’, there’s not a star in heaven that we can’t reach. If we’re tryin’, so we’re breaking free…”

“Is this High School Musical?” He smiled, looking at her as they pulled up to a stoplight.

“Yeah,” she replied, smiling sheepishly as she rubbed her arm. “My music library’s kind of all over the place and sometimes I like listening to the old Disney classics.”

He laughed, nodding his head as he reached out and turned the volume dial up just a little. “I remember watching this when it came out. I was always a hockey player, but that’s when I discovered that maybe I wasn’t exactly a basketball player.”

“Oh God, why can I see you dressed up as Troy Bolton for Halloween?” Riley laughed, looking at him.

Matthew’s face scrunched up as she shook his head. “Oh hell no, never. I was always a hockey player for Halloween, never the same one unless it was my Dad. But my brother and I switched each year on who got to be him.” He looked over at her with that same smirk from the bar. “But I do know the words to the song.”

“Go on then,” Riley smiled, motioning towards the radio. “Sing it.”

Matthew cleared his throat as he turned the music down just barely, as if the difference in volume would make a difference in whether or not she’d be able to hear him sing. “We’re soarin’, flyin’, there’s not a star in heaven that we can’t reach. If we’re tryin’, yeah we’re breaking free–”

“Okay, no, no,” Riley laughed, reaching out and turning the volume way down as Matthew laughed. “I’m sorry, but I can not have you butchering the musical stylings of Troy and Gabriella like that.”

“Hey, I’m not that bad of a singer!”

“Yeah, it’s cute that you try.”

The car rolled to a stop as the song continued to play quietly, Matthew tapping his fingers on the top of his steering wheel and chewing the inside of his cheek as he stared ahead at the red light, waiting for it to turn green. “I normally stay up a little bit after games because it takes me some time to wind down, and the coffee shop I usually go to is on the way to your apartment…” He looked at her, and even Riley wasn’t oblivious to the nerves written all over his face. “Would you want to stop and grab something to drink maybe?”

“I could go for a hot chocolate or something,” Riley nodded, looking at him.

“Okay, cool,” Matthew smiled, looking back towards the light as it turned green and kept driving.

It turns out that the coffee shop Matthew had mentioned, was only a few blocks up ahead from where they had been. They were closing soon and Matthew asked if she would be okay with staying in the car while he went to grab their drinks, just so she didn’t have to walk out into the cold January air. He stayed nearby, making sure she locked it once he had left and then Riley watched through the passenger window as he walked into the coffee shop with the same urgency as he had when he walked around his car.

She knew of Matthew only because of living in the city of Calgary who took their hockey very seriously. Plus, her sister was dating their goalie and Riley had tagged along to some events and nights out with the girlfriends and wives of players. Most importantly, his dad was treasured back home in her hometown of St. Louis, having played there during the years where she and her family had gone to games. But never in her entire life had she crossed paths with Matthew or his family– not until she moved to Calgary, not until Claire started dating Jacob, and most definitely not until last week at the bar or this moment right now sitting in his car, waiting for him to come back with their hot drinks. 

Riley saw Matthew place money in a tip jar before turning back around with two drinks in hand. Once she saw he was at her door, she rolled the window down to take the drinks from him and placed them into the cupholder before unlocking the car so he could get back into the car. 

“So I know I said I’d take you home, but can I show you something first?” He asked, picking up one of the drinks and handing it to her. “They’re both hot chocolate by the way, so you don’t have to take this one.”

“No it’s fine,” she replied, taking the cup. “And I mean���sure? I guess I’m not really all that tired right now.”

“Cool. I promise it’s not too far, it’s actually just around the corner,” he smiled, putting the car into park and peeling into the street before continuing to drive.

She sat in the passenger seat, sipping on her hot chocolate as Matthew continued the drive, eventually pulling into the parking garage of an apartment complex that Riley had considered moving into herself shortly before moving out of her and Claire’s shared apartment. They drove up to the second level before finally finding a spot, Matthew pulling into it and putting the car into park.

“It’s just a little bit of a walk, but not much, I promise,” Matt said, looking at her before opening his car door and getting out.

Riley followed suit, making sure she had her phone, purse and hot chocolate before closing the passenger door and walking towards the end of the car. “I actually considered moving here a year ago.”

“Really?” Matthew asked, standing by the trunk and waiting for her to be beside him before they started walking. “Too bad you didn’t. Maybe we could’ve been neighbors.”

Riley snorted, shaking her head as she took a long sip of her hot chocolate. “That’s doubtful. I don’t have NHL money.”

Matthew stopped just ahead of her and stood in her way, holding out his hand and motioning for her. “Here, put this on,” he held his coat out as he nodded at her drink in her hand. “I’ll hold your drink.”

“Oh, it’s really no–”

“I’ve at least got a long sleeve shirt and a jacket on to keep me warm, you’ve got…whatever kind of sweater that is.” He moved the winter coat again, “just take it, you’ll need it I promise.”

Instead of arguing with him, Riley just sighed and nodded and handed over her hot chocolate before taking the black winter coat he’d had draped over his arm at the arena, unfolding it and putting it on, buttoning only the middle button so it wouldn’t stay open. “There, I’m a little warmer now.”

“Good, because Claire would kill me if I let you freeze to death I’m sure.” He replied, handing her back her drink before nodding his head back. “Come on, I’ll take you to what I wanted to show you.”

“As long as I’m in my own bed by midnight and you’re not going to turn me into the next inspiration for a Criminal Minds episode when they come back with their reboot, then okay.”

She walked alongside him as he scanned a key fob to get into the building, once again Matthew holding the door open for her and allowing her to walk in first before following just behind her and nodding his head to his left. “The elevator right here.”

“So what’s this thing you want to show me?” She asked, waiting for him to close the door behind him.

“It’s a surprise,” he replied, making sure the door closed behind him before walking over and nodding at the elevator button. “You should feel special because I don’t show this spot to just anyone.” He looked at her with that same playful smirk.

Riley pressed the button, signaling for the elevator to come to the floor they were on and when the double doors opened, they both walked into the elevator, Matthew pressing the close doors button as well as the button at the top of them all that had only say T. As the elevator started to move, Riley leisurely sipped on her hot chocolate, Matthew doing the same as they waited for the elevator to come to a stop.

“I’m not sleeping with you,” she chimed, the words she meant to say earlier when he brought up going somewhere else instead of taking her right home, finally coming out. “I meant what I said about being back in my own bed by midnight.” 

“Relax,” he laughed, rolling his eyes. “My mom raised me right, you know.”

“Oh, so you’re telling me you’ve never had a one night stand? Mr. makes a million dollars a year, basically the face of a franchise and NHL player?” Her voice dripped with sarcasm as she brought the cup back up to her lips.

When the elevator stopped and the doors opened, Matthew stepped towards the doors, holding his arm out in front of them and waving for her to walk through. “Actually I’m earning nine million this year,” he replied, tilting his head to the side as he took a sip of his hot chocolate and sighing. “And I’m hardly the face of a franchise, that’s Johnny. And no, I didn’t say that, just come on will you?”

She followed his directions, stepping off of the elevator and back out into the cold January air. “Where are we?” She asked, holding her hot chocolate closer to her chest as she heard the elevator doors close behind her.

“I found it when I moved in,” he said, nodding at her to follow him as he started to walk away from the elevator and down the wheelchair ramp. “The owner of the complex doesn’t advertise it when people check into living here, mainly because it has no standing on the rent.”

There were small posts that hung garden lights from around them, dimly lighting the space they were on. As Riley looked around, she noticed a different variety of lounge chairs– the kinds you could find in gardens, on front porches or even poolside. She could see off to their left, was what looked to be a small garden, though again the light that the garden lights hung around the seating area didn’t really show all that much. She could, however, see the fire pit that sat in the center of all of the chairs, letting her know that this must be some kind of hang out spot for the complex. Maybe if she had looked deeper into this complex when she was searching for a new apartment, she might’ve known about it.

“Over there’s a small community garden, I think there’s a few vegetables and spices, but really it’s only flowers. I asked the owner about it when I came up here one day after drunk pressing the wrong floor and he said he puts a place like this on all of his properties, in memory of his wife who died of breast cancer because she loved to garden.” Matthew walked away from the garden and just passed some of the chairs before coming to a stop on the other side of the rooftop, where there were no dim garden lights. “The whole terrace is supposed to be a kind of place where people can come out and relax, clear their minds, you know? But I’ve never seen anyone come up here.”

“Maybe because it’s cold,” Riley said, walking up next to him and leaning her arms against the ledge of the terrace.

Matthew rolled his eyes and rested his hot chocolate on the ledge. “You don’t say?”

“Just pointing out the obvious is all,” she smiled, taking another sip of her hot chocolate as she looked towards the other side of the terrace. “The idea of it is nice though, I like it. Plus the view,” she blew out a low whistle as she looked back out towards downtown Calgary. “It’s beautiful. I can only imagine what it looks like during the day.”

“I like it better at night,” Matthew replied, tapping his fingers against his cup as he shrugged. “It helps clear my mind a bit after games.”

“Only if you’re not going out with the boys, right?” She asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Right,” he laughed, nodding his head as he took a sip of his hot chocolate and shrugged. “It kind of reminds me of looking out of the airplane window when you’re flying at night, you know? Seeing all the lights from the buildings in the city you’re flying over and how there’s a whole city of people who are living their lives individually. It makes you realize just how big the world is.”

Riley let a few moments of silence pass as she let her cooling down hot chocolate cup try to warm up her hands before she nodded and looked at him. “Wow…that was deep for a hockey player.”

He laughed and shook his head as he kept his eyes out towards the cityscape, opening his mouth to say something, only to pause and stand up straight from his leaning stature, pointing ahead of him. “Wait, look!”

Riley raised an eyebrow as she looked out over the city lights and out towards the far away, dark horizon. “What?”

“This is going to sound ridiculous, but I swear I saw a shooting star,” Matthew kept his gaze out ahead of him for a few more seconds before he let his hand drop and he looked at her. “Like…no bullshit it moved.”

“Orrrrr,” she dragged out, looking at him. “Maybe it was an airplane.”

“Moving that fast? Really?”

“You never know with guys like Elon Musk trying to build crazy shit and defy the inevitable every second of every day,” she replied, bringing her cup back up to her lips as she turned back towards the city.

Matthew let the silence settle between them, though she could still feel his gaze on her and his body being turned towards her as well. “You’re a lot different than your sister…”

“Says you and every other person who’s walked into our lives.” Riley shrugged, holding her cup with both hands. “Claire’s a lot more…hopeful, she likes to see the petter picture of options and I’m more–”

“Of a cynical bitch?” Riley almost choked on her sip of air, rather than hot chocolate seeing as she hadn’t tipped her cup far enough yet, and when she looked at Matthew, he was looking at her with wide eyes. “Sorry…are we not at that level of friendship yet?”

This time she laughed as she placed her cup down onto the ledge and nodded. “Actually, I was going to say the same thing.”

“So…why is that?” He asked, reaching out and gripping his fingers onto the concrete ledge as he leaned himself backwards, almost as if he was stretching his arms. “You guys are what? Only a little over a year apart?”

“You said you have a brother right?” She asked, as he nodded in reply. “Are you and your brother the same person?”

“Well…kind of?” He replied, shrugging. “But he can get a little more crazy than me. Plus he’s got that whole middle child thing going on, so he always needs to be the center of attention.”

“Hey, I’m a middle child,” Riley faked offense, reaching out and nudging his arm.

“You said it, not me.” Matthew smiled, tilting his head to the side. “But really…siblings having their individual personalities aside…you guys aren’t that far apart in age, so I guess I just figured you’d be a little bit alike, you know”

“I don’t know,” Riley took a deep breath and sighed as she shrugged her shoulders and looked at him. “Claire will say it’s because of my Junior year prom date standing me up and going to prom with his ex-girlfriend– why are you doing that?”

“Doing what?” He asked, trying to fight back the knowing smirk that was already present on his face.

“Smirking,” she said, turning her body towards him and waving at his face. “You’re smirking and nodding like you just figured something out.”

“More like figured you out,” he replied, pulling himself closer to the ledge before letting go of the concrete and bringing his arms into his chest as he rested them on the ledge and leaned against them. “And I don’t think you’re as cynical as you think or want people to think you are. I just think you’re scared.”

“Yeah, well, you don’t know me.”

“No,” he replied, looking over at her. “But I’d like to…get to know you.”

Riley squinted as she held her arms closer to her and leaned against the ledge, almost copying him. “Why?”

“Well for one, I think it’s cool we’re from the same city–”

“Technically state, because you’re from boujee Chesterfield.”

“And second…I think you’re funny and I definitely liked how you were at the club.”

“Ohhhh,” Riley smiled, nodding at him. “So you liked how I didn’t fall for your little pick up routine, right? Let me guess…you like the challenge?”

Matthew didn’t smile or put that smirk on like she thought he would, like most men would the moment the challenge of picking up a woman was brought up. Instead he just stuck out his bottom lip partially and shrugged. “I don’t see you as a challenge because you’re a person…but you’ve piqued my interest and I’d like to get to know you better. Plus your sister’s dating my teammate so.”

Riley turned back towards him and leaned her left arm on the railing. “Well I hate to break it to you Matthew, but I really don’t see this happening. Relationships and I don’t really do well–”

“Oh? So you admit it?” He asked, raising both eyebrows as he turned towards her. “You want a relationship?”

“I– no, that’s not–” Riley huffed in frustration as soon as she saw him smile and then rolled her eyes in an effort to keep her own smile at bay. “Fine.”

“Fine what?”

“I’ll let you consider this our first date,” she replied, nodding at him before curling her upper lip slightly. “Though it’s not looking too good that you spent the first near two hours of our date smashing other guys into boards, plus the extra thirty minutes of waiting after…and not to mention you didn’t even give me a puck.”

Matthew laughed, a deep, belly laugh as he head leaned back just slightly before nodding and looking at her. “Okay, so I’ll have to make the second date better then. Don’t worry, I got it.”

“Wow. Already giving up on this one that you think it’s going to end badly? What? Afraid I’ll tell my sister how bad of a kisser you are when you try to kiss me tonight?”

That stupid smirk returned as he stood himself up straight and turned to her. Riley wanted to do nothing more than to kiss it off of his stupid lips and by the way he looked at her, he knew it too. “That’s the thing, I’m not kissing you tonight. Come on, let me take you home.”

“And why not?” Riley’s eyebrows furrowed as she grabbed her hot chocolate and followed behind him back towards the chairs. “Am I not kissable?”

He laughed again, finishing off his hot chocolate before tossing it into the trashcan, holding the slot open for her as she finished what remained of hers and tossed it in as well. “Oh no, you’re definitely kissable and I’m fighting every urge right now not to kiss you.” He led them up to the elevator and he pressed the button. “But my mom always taught me not to kiss on the first date.”

Riley hugged her arms closer to her, starting to feel the Calgary chill as the wind started to pick up. If she wasn’t so cold, she was sure that the shock of his statement would be frozen all over her face. Here he was, a 24-year-old bachelor living in a city that praised the ice he skated on. He’d had one night stands, he told her that, and yet she wouldn’t…couldn’t wrap her mind around the fact Matthew Tkachuk…didn’t kiss on the first date?

“I-well..that’s…” she paused, unsure of how to play off her shock despite her already failing so miserably to do so. “Sweet.”

Matthew smiled, nodding his head. “And if you let me take you home so you don’t freeze to death, I guarantee you’ll learn more about me on our second date…and maybe get a kiss at the end of that too.”

Riley scoffed, shaking her head and standing up straight as the elevator doors opened. “I’m not cold.”

“Say that to the shivering sound of your teeth when you were doubting my shooting star,” he reached out and rested his hand on the small of her back, nudging her into the warmth of the elevator first, keeping it there as he walked into the elevator himself, removing it once they were both inside of the elevator and he pressed the button of the floor they needed to go to and her back pressed against the elevator wall.

It didn’t matter though. She felt the warmth of his hand against her skin through both his jacket and her flimsy sweater the rest of the elevator ride, the car ride back to her apartment and when she was lying in her own bed.

At 11:59.

DAY 43 – FEBRUARY 12TH, 2022 [ IT'S OFFICIAL ]

How the hell did I get here?

That’s a question Riley found herself asking herself anytime that she woke up in Matthew’s apartment. Whether that was on his couch or in his bed, she always wondered. And the question wasn’t asked in a “I got too drunk last night how the hell did I get here” way, it was more of a “how the hell did I end up waking up in the apartment of a man, most of the time not hungover or after a wild night out– but instead after receiving the text of ‘just landed, not tired, feel like coming over to watch a movie?’” Kind of way.

Only a handful of times in the last three weeks has she found herself waking up in his apartment with her head throbbing, her mouth dry from drinking and the taste of her drunken meal lingering in her morning breath. The rest of the time she’s woken up from falling asleep on the couch watching a movie or a show one of his teammates or his friends from home or his siblings suggested he watched, waking up in his bed curled up beneath his heavy comforter with her head sharing the space with his on his all-time favorite pillow.

But no matter how she ended up at his apartment or the circumstances behind how she fell asleep and where, the two things that were consistent every single time, were her wearing one of his shirts and that she always woke up with his arms wrapped around her. Unless, like this morning, he somehow woke up before her and she was greeted to an empty bed. But the smell of food and the sound of running water and pans clinking echoing from behind his closed bedroom door told her exactly where he was and what he was doing.

Riley got out of bed, turning towards the mattress and making her side of the bed up and looking up to see that he had already done it, even though he’s always made a joke at how the first thing she does when she wakes up in the morning is make the bed– even if he’s still in it. She walked over to his dresser, opening the third drawer which she knew had his gym shorts in it and pulled out a black pair before closing the drawer and then putting the shorts on, rolling the waistband once before opening his bedroom door and walking out into his apartment, immediately seeing him standing in his kitchen by the stove, his back facing her.

She walked over, feeling the cool of the wooden floor beneath her feet as she made her way through both the living room and dining room and into the kitchen, the tile even colder. She came up behind him, wrapping her arms around his waist and standing up on her toes to rest her chin on his shoulder. “Whatcha doing?”

“Well good morning sleeping beauty,” Matt laughed, looking at her and lifting his right arm up to let her move under it so she was resting against his side. “I didn’t think you’d be getting up for another hour.”

“Mm, I smelled breakfast,” she smiled, looking up at him and leaning up to kiss him before turning back  and snuggling into his side. “Which I assume you’re making for yourself?”

“Ha ha, no,” he replied, rolling his eyes as he carefully switched the spatula from his right hand to his left and flipped the omelet. “I was actually going to surprise you with breakfast in bed. But seeing as you’re awake now, do you think you can go ahead and crack the eggs and scramble them for me so I can make mine once yours is done?”

“I don’t know,” she shrugged. “I kind of like the idea of breakfast in bed, sounds super romantic actually. Almost–” she paused as the word froze in her throat. Domesticated. ‘Almost domesticated’ is what she was going to say, but she couldn’t…wouldn’t, really.

Sure, it’s already been almost three weeks since that failed blind double date, turned…sort of first date for her and Matthew and maybe by now, especially with as often as they talked and how much time they spent together between her classes and his schedule, including just how many times post game they tagged along to a late dinner with Claire and Jacob or another player and their significant other…they never had a talk about being official. A “what are we” conversation has definitely happened, Matthew first brought it up one month in, stating that he didn’t want to just be a hook-up, but also wasn’t sure if he wanted a relationship yet and her stance was the same. The conversation ended with no solid answer, but they both decided to continue with…whatever this was anyway.

Because then, she wasn’t quite sure what she wanted. A relationship was…a possibility in the cards, but at that point in time it didn’t feel like she could truly open herself up to one, especially one with him. Yet here she was, almost two months later and the word ‘domesticated’ almost came out of her mouth to describe the very action Matthew was doing– making them breakfast.

And for the first time since high school, she wanted to be in a relationship. More importantly, she wanted to be in one with him…but she’d gone along with not wanting a relationship he brought up first, so maybe it would be best to just play along with whatever they were doing until Matthew changed his mind.

And hopefully he changed his mind.

“Riles?”

“Hm?” She asked, shaking her head slightly before looking up at him.

“The eggs?”

“Oh, yeah, sure,” she nodded, unwrapping her arms from his waist and walking over to the fridge.

“Did I lose you there for a second?” He laughed, flipping the omelet again before picking up the pan and tilting it, letting the omelete slide onto the plate. “You kinda paused there.”

“Oh no,  just…brain fart, you know?” She laughed, grabbing two more eggs from the fridge before closing it, walking behind him and to his left where the bowl he’d previously used was. “I was just going to say that it was almost enough to make me really like you is all.”

Matthew snorted, nodding his head as he sprayed the pan again with some pam. “So what does that mean? You only like me?”

Riley looked over her right shoulder with a playful smile and shrugged. “Eh.”

“Eh?” He mimicked, shaking his head. “Does this mean I can cancel our having no plans and go out and catch up with the rest of the guys out at the simulated golf course today?”

She immediately turned around, eyes wide as she shook her head. “Wait no, you said we could just stay in today and relax since we’re going to that big super bowl party tomorrow,” she started to pout as he walked over to her, taking the eggs from her hands. “We were supposed to start One Tree Hill today.”

Matthew cracked an egg and dropped it into the bowel before tossing the shell into the sink, shrugging as he pouted. “Eh.”

“Matthew–” Riley barely spoke before he looked at her with that stupid smirk that always made her stomach fill with butterflies. He was never going to cancel their day in, he was only messing with her. She nudged him away, taking the remaining egg back and cracking it into the bowl. “You suck.”

He leaned in and kissed her cheek while simultaneously taking the bowl from her and handing her the plate with her omelete on it. “Eat your breakfast, I’ve already got the bread in the toaster so all you’ll need to do it toast it and butter it.”

Riley walked over to the toaster, pushing down the slots and then left her plate in front of it before moving just a little way over and pulling herself up onto the counter. “So…”

She paused again as she stared at the back of him, adding the cheese and spinach into his omelete. Again, she was asking herself the same ‘how the hell did I get here?’ Question that she’s been asking herself for weeks now. How, in the actual hell, did she go from cynical, romance is gross, jokingly telling Claire and Jacob to at least warn her before they were going to kiss in her presence, never getting the big hype about rom-com movies…to this? To waking up in bed with Matthew in mornings after nights where sometimes all they did was lounge on the couch and watch a new Netflix suggestion? To knowing her way around his apartment like she did her own? She had products in his shower, his clothes were hers, she kept a pair of shoes over here, he had almond milk in the fridge for her and her favorite cereal mingled in with his own. To him making her breakfast and planning on greeting her in bed with it?

It almost felt surreal, her entire situation. How did it all happen so fast, practically In the blink of an eye– like all of the rom-com’s Claire loved to watch every weekend– and she never even noticed it?

“Sooo?” Matthew echoed, bringing her back into reality as he looked over his shoulder. “Care to finish that thought?”

“I was just going to ask if you were prepared to enjoy the amazing, legendary show of One Tree Hill? And also that you can’t watch it without me, because I need to see your reaction to the most pinnacle stuff.”

“Is it really that legendary if I’ve never heard of it?” He asked, raising an eyebrow as he looked over at her.

Riley rolled her eyes as their pieces of toast popped up. “Considering your only interests in life when the show was on air was hockey and oh wait…hockey!” She nudged herself off of the counter and smiled at him. “I would be surprised if you have heard of it.”

“Hey, I like to think that interest in hockey paid off, hm?” He said, turning the stove off before placing his omelete onto his plate.

“All I know is that if you’re on the wrong Scott’s brother team, I don’t know if we can be friends,” she said, taking the lid off of the butter and starting to butter the pieces of toast.

“Ouch, first I’m demoted to like and now we might not be friends?” He playfully scoffed as she put the toast onto his plate and cut it. “I guess I better not mess this up huh?” He whispered into her ear before kissing her temple and then grabbing both of their plates just as she put her toast onto her own. “Now come on, we’ve got hill trees to watch.”

“Tree Hill!” She groaned, taking the butter and putting it into the fridge. “It’s called One Tree Hill!”

“Yeah, yeah,” he said, shooting her a smile over his shoulder. “Now come on, it’s time to start our day of relaxing.”

And they did. They had breakfast together, starting season one, episode one of One Tree Hill at 10:30 am…and almost twelve hours later and every bathroom break, pause to answer a question and door dash delivery in between…they were on season one, episode eighteen with five more episodes left of the first season.

For Riley, it was one of her personal favorite episodes– the Boy Toy charity auction episode– and despite Matthew thinking (and complaining) it was because of Nathan Scott walking out onto the stage and taking off his jacket to reveal ‘boy toy’ written across his very impressive abs– “I might not have a six pack but I’m better.” “He’s Nathan Scott…”– it was actually because of the growth Nathan shows and then the development of the lives of the other characters and the relationships.

Still…Nathan Scott shirtless also wasn’t that bad of a sight.

But right there on the couch was where they spent their entire day, lounging around in different positions unless it came to eating food, then they both sat up, but once they were done they went back down into whatever position they’d been lying in prior. And right now, the position they were lying in and had been lying in for the better half of the last two episodes since they finished dinner, had them both sharing the chaise of Matthew’s sectional sofa. Matthew was laying the full length of it, while Riley was too, except she had her head rested in his lap and her body curled up as she laid on her right side, her head resting on his right thigh where his hands had been alternating between playing with her hair or just simply running his fingers through it.

The fact that their entire day had been spent lounging around together and more specifically, that small action of him playing with her hair, wasn’t helping her brain to keep from focusing on the domestic dilemma they were in…or maybe it was just her, because Matthew looked like he had nothing going on except for everything in the moment. The dire need to know just what exactly their situation was, was bouncing around in her head so much, that she had completely missed the last five minutes of the episode, not realizing it until she felt him reach out with his right hand to grab the remote beside him.

‘What are we doing?” She asked, looking up at him.

“Um…watching the next episode of One Tree Hill?” He replied, looking confused as he paused the tv. “Unless you don’t want to?”

She felt her face heat up at the bluntness of her question without any context and Matthew must have been able to tell she was embarrassed about something, because he motioned for her to move closer to him as he sat himself up against the back of the couch. Riley felt like a puppy with its tail between its legs as she pushed herself up and carefully moved so not to lean too much against his lap, and ended up laying down between him and the arm of the couch.

“Are you tired? Do you want to go to bed?” He asked, nodding towards the tv. “Or did I completely misread your question?”

“I mean…I wasn’t really all that straightforward with what I meant,” she spoke nervously, her left hand resting on the material of his t-shirt and playing with the ripples in the fabric.

“I’m still not sure what we’re talking about here…” He replied, his eyebrows furrowing as he rolled the remote in his hand.

Riley took a deep breath and exhaled, pushing herself up onto her right hand as she leaned back against the arm rest. “I know…we talked about how this isn’t really an exclusive hook-up situation, but you also don’t know if you want a relationship right now and I don’t know. I have products in your bathroom, I keep an extra pair of shoes here, you’ve got some stuff at my place.”

She looked up from her twiddling hands and sighed, shrugging her shoulders. “I guess I just want to know what we are, because Claire’s got a big mouth and no doubt has told them something or referred to you as my boyfriend and I just really need to know what to tell my parents and well…everyone else when they ask…I guess?”

Matthew just stared at her and every passing second felt like it was dragging on and the longer he stayed silent, the more embarrassed she felt and wanted to play it off as if she was just sleep talking- though she knew that he wouldn’t believe it for a second.

“Okay,” he cleared his throat, readjusting his posture as he tried to turn his body more towards her. “I mean…I was going to wait till after Valentine’s Day to ask if you wanted to make it more official, because I know you hate Valentine’s Day–”

“I don’t hate Valentine’s Day,” Riley scoffed, rolling her eyes. “I just think it can be super cheesy sometimes, plus the whole,” she waved her hand aimlessly, “going all out on one day of the year and putting half-assed effort into a relationship the other 364 days is dumb.”

Matthew held back a smile as he looked at her. “Wanna date?”

Her face deadpanned as she looked at the now beaming Matthew, her heart racing within her chest. “Really? You ask like that?”

“Just kidding, but I’m also dead serious,” he replied, dropping the remote in his lap as he held onto one of her hands. “I’ve been really enjoying…whatever this has been the last two months, and I know I said I wasn’t sure if I was ready for a relationship…but I’m pretty sure now that I do. So do you want to change this,” he motioned between them with his free hand before resting his left arm back over the back of the couch. “Into us dating…officially?”

Now Riley was the one who sat there staring at him, only her mouth was slightly opened and the word, though she was dying to say it, sat there frozen on the tip of her tongue. “Riles? Now would uh…be a good time to answer?”

“Yeah?” She finally replied, before nodding her head as an unsure look crossed his face. “Yes, I mean yes.”

Matthew smiled and leaned in, pressing her against the arm of the couch as he kissed her before pulling back and looking at her. “I was going to do this the whole romantic way, you know? Flowers, chocolates, take you out to a nice dinner and I know you’re not a big fan of it, but will you also be my Valentine?”

Riley playfully scoffed as she rolled her eyes, leaning forward and pressing her nose against his. “If I must.” She kissed him again before pulling away and then patting his thigh. “Now back to One Tree Hill, we’ve got four more episodes and then we’ve finished season one.”

“Four?” He sighed, leaning his head back as she crawled back between his legs, laying back to where she was before. “We’re sleeping on the couch tonight aren’t we?”

She looked back at him with a smile and shrugged. “Wouldn’t be the first time. Besides, we have no plans until the afternoon, we’ll get some sleep.”

Matthew picked the remote back up and started the next episode before resting it back down onto the couch beside him. He reached forward, tugging on the blanket that she was using and making sure she was covered up enough before she felt him sink back down into the couch. Riley tried hard not to let the butterflies she was feeling in her stomach turn into her own self feeling antsy as she laid there thinking about the reactions of Claire and the rest of the WAGs tomorrow when they found out that Matthew and she had finally decided to date. And then she couldn’t stop her mind from spiraling about her parents, other friends, would things change between them or would the relaxing hangouts feel like more needed to be happening? All of this was so new to her. The last time she had a “boyfriend” was in seventh grade– and who really counted those? That wasn’t this– this was so different, this was–

And as if he knew she was starting to spiral inside of her own head, Matthew started to play with her hair again, alternating between running his fingers through her hair or rubbing her hair back and out of her forehead. Soon, the worried thoughts about what their current relationship would, should or could turn into and she felt her body relax into the couch and into Matthew as she watched the show on the tv in front of them. And when her body relaxed, her eyes did too and she found it hard to keep them open long enough to retain what was actually taking place.

She’d seen One Tree Hill all the way through multiple times, so she knew all about what happened in this episode. But it was the thought of experiencing it for the first time with Matthew that kept making her open her eyes despite the time in between getting longer and longer each time. But when she felt Matthew tug the blanket up just over her shoulders, brush the hair away from her face and lean down and kiss her temple, before sitting back up. She half expected him to pause the show and switch it to something else since she knew he wasn’t really all that tired.

Yet the last thing she remembered hearing was Nathan telling Haley he fell in love with her, meaning he had stuck with watching the episode even after he knew she’d stopped paying attention. And she could’ve sworn she heard the all too familiar opening of Gavin Degraw’s “I Don’t Want to Be” right before she really fell asleep, and the feeling of Matthew’s fingers still playing in her hair.

Calming the rapidness of the butterflies in her stomach’s wings…to nothing but a small flutter, leaving her feeling all warm inside.

DAY 69 – MARCH 10TH, 2022 [ ARGUMENTS AND LATE NIGHT APOLOGIES ]

In both aspects, it would be right to say that just like their relationship, things were picking up fast in their day to day lives. For Riley, the end of her final semester of college was only two some months away and she found her days filled with coffee, power naps, study sessions with her classmates or Kelsey, papers and of course, Calgary Flames home games. For Matthew, the end of the season was approaching fast and it was he and everyone of his teammate’s mission to make it into the postseason after missing out the year before. This year felt like maybe they could do it, find the redemption from the 2020 bubble playoffs where they imploded.

Yet despite the chaos going on in their lives, everything in regards to their relationship felt almost too good to be true. Riley found herself staying over at Matthew’s apartment more often than her own, and on the nights when she would leave campus late and was too tired to make the drive to his, he’d drive over to hers and stay with her. They’d cook dinner together or order take-out, talk about their days and listen as the other vented about whatever it was that was on their mind or bothering them, then they’d either watch tv and fall asleep on the couch or go find some sort of solace in a bedroom.

Tonight was going to be the same as the last two weeks as well. Riley would go to class while Matthew went to morning skate, he’d go through his daily routine while she stayed on campus for other classes and hiding away in the library to try her best to knock out her homework and get a little more of her paper down. Then she’d meet up with Claire and Kelsey at Claire’s apartment and then they’d go to Saddledome for the game. It felt like any other night, really– but Matthew was stressing, despite Riley telling him that he didn’t need to.

“We’re playing Tampa, Riles. Everyone expects them to win because they’re back to back cup champs. It’s a big game.” Was what he said anytime over the phone or in text that she told him he just needed to relax and play his game.

Kelsey had left the library an hour earlier than planned so she could go home and have a dinner with Oscar before he left for the arena. While Riley stayed back in the reserved study room, stressing over her paper when she got an email from her professor that was sent to their entire class talking about how they needed to make an office appointment with her to present a second rough draft of their oral presentation.

The most important presentation of her life that she absolutely needed to pass in order to pass her Capstone and achieve her degree.

She probably should have left then. Followed the advice that she’d been giving Matthew for the last few hours and gone to her apartment to relax. Instead, she stayed in the study room and tried to balance her focus between her paper and her presentation. Her focus was by no means balanced evenly between the two, considering she spent a nice fifteen minute break in between crying over the stress before diving back into her notes and trying to wrap up her paper…and then the yawns came, which was maybe another time she should’ve decided to go home and rest before the game.

But she did was she always did whenever she found herself getting tired while studying. She set a short alarm to wake her up in ten minutes, the perfect power nap, and then she’d finish whatever she could before she’d leave for her apartment to get dressed and then meet up with Kelsey and Claire.

Except…that’s not how it happened. Instead of waking up ten minutes later, she woke up almost two hours later to her phone vibrating against the table and her face. She fully woke up the moment the call ended, practically jumping out of her seat when she saw the time and all of the notifications that she had from Matt, Claire and Kelsey. And then she saw the time.

The game had started 30 minutes ago.

She quickly collected all of her stuff and left the study room, rushing through the library while simultaneously ordering her uber to the arena, hoping that she’d get there with time to spare. Thankfully, she didn’t have to wait long for an uber before she was on her way to the stadium, digging through her purse for the family lanyard and ticket Matt had given her when she came home for lunch. And after begging the arena staff to let her bring her backpack in and she was willing to drop it off with security just as long as they’d let her bring it in– she was allowed to do it, but it took quite the convincing with the security managers.

By the time she reached the seats where she saw Claire, Kelsey and a few of the other WAGs sitting, she was out of breath, felt extremely disheveled and probably looked like she was crazy.

“Where the hell have you been?” Claire asked, her tone holding 

“I fell asleep in the study room, I’m sorry,” Riley replied, moving by Kelsey and sitting down between the two of them. “I just got here–”

“You missed the first two periods, but they’re getting ready to start the third so there’s still some game for you to watch.” Kelsey added, nodding towards the ice.

“How’s he doing?” Riley asked, looking at them both before looking up at the score. “And we’re winning three to one, so that’s great!”

“He’s had a few shots on goal, but other than that he got an assist on Johnny’s second goal,” Claire replied, as the arena lights started to dim. “So good, but I’m sure it’s not what he wants to be doing.”

Riley sat there and paid as best attention to the remainder of the game that she could, hoping that Matthew hadn’t noticed her lack of attendance earlier in the game and that if he did, by some slim chance then maybe he’d notice she was here now. Johnny scored another goal late in the third, getting himself a hat trick and giving the Flames an four to one lead, resulting in a Flames win the moment time ran out of the buzzer signaling the end of the game went off. She stayed with the group of women as they left their seats to make their way down to meet up with the boys. Kelsey stayed with her as she met up with one of the supervisors who had her backpack and grabbed it before finally making her way down beneath the stadium, making it just in time before any of the players made their way out of the locker room.

Jacob and Matthew both didn’t do any post-game media, so it wasn’t that long of a wait for them to come out of the locker room showered and dressed back in their suits. Despite the big win against the back-to-back Stanley Cup Champions, Matthew seemed a little more down than he usually was after a win and Riley couldn’t help but think maybe it was because he somehow knew she was late to the game, even after she promised that she would be there. She tried not to dwell too much on that thought, because she knew it was an accident but also because she didn’t want the situation to turn into something bigger just when things seemed to be going so well.

Oscar got stuck doing media, so Kelsey gave them the go ahead to leave without her since she would be waiting. The four of them walked together, making their way to the parking garage where eventually, they said their goodbyes to each other and got into their separate cars. The drive home was quiet, but Matthew, like every other time they rode in a car together, had his right hand rested on her thigh, which was the only thing keeping Riley from thinking that the car ride was quiet due to him being upset. It’d been a long day and they were both tired.

Once they reached Matthew’s apartment complex, the two of them made their way to his apartment, side by side but not hand in hand, still in silence. But over anything, at least the physical distance between them wasn’t great. Every once in a while, their shoulders would brush against each other– and it was weird that Riley was finding some sort of comfort in that since everything inside of her was telling her that clearly there was some tension that wasn’t due to the silence. Matthew stood in front of his apartment door, unlocking it and then walking in, Riley following in behind him and closing the door.

She was paying attention to what he was doing for the reason that if she was wrong, then she would take the jump and ask him if everything was okay. Because Matthew had a similar routine every time they came back to his apartment after a game. He’d hang his keys up on the wall, then walk past the kitchen and place his jacket onto the kitchen table before taking his shoes off and then walking into his room to change over. Only the moment that he tossed his keys onto the bar counter and continued to walk into his room, she knew obviously something was wrong.

Riley let some space settle between them before she followed behind him into his bedroom, staying by the door as he tossed his jacket into the hamper he often took to get dry cleaned and started undressing before walking into his closet.

“Is everything okay?” She asked, walking further into the room and standing in front of his closet where he had taken off his shoes and was taking off his suit pants.

“Everything’s fine,” he replied, draping his belt onto a hanger and stepping out of his pants, bending down to grab them.

“Are you sure?” Riley asked, crossing her arms and furrowing her eyebrows as he took off his shirt and socks, carrying the clothes and walking out of the closet before dropping them into the respective hampers– dry cleaning and normal laundry.

“Yep,” he said, walking back by her again and going back into his closet, tugging on one of the dresser drawers. “Why?”

“You just seem off…I guess,” she replied, leaning against the closet opening.

“Nope, I’m fine,” he replied, shutting the dresser drawer and changing out of his briefs, putting on a new pair before looking at the clothes in front of him. “Everything is perfectly fine.”

It was one thing for her own brain to try and nag her about being late to his game and make her feel bad, but it was a whole nother thing for it to be Matthew to do the same. Clearly he was upset about something and was being sarcastic now that she was asking for it. And instead of arguing about it, Riley just wanted to say her piece and move on.

“If you don’t want to tell me what’s wrong then that’s fine, but you don’t have to be so sarcastic with your answers.” She replied, turning away from his closet and walking out of his room and over to the kitchen table, placing her backpack down onto it and starting to unpack so she could get some more work done.

She plugged her laptop charger into the wall and sat down in her chair, just as she heard Matthew come walking out of his room, zipping up his pair of jeans, stopping by the kitchen table and looking at her and laughing dryly. “Of course you’re doing more homework.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” She asked, turning in her chair. Matthew rolled his eyes, but not before he shook his head as if to brush her off. “No, don’t just shake your head and ignore me. What’s that supposed to mean Matthew, hm?”

“It means exactly what it sounds like it means, Riley,” he said, motioning towards her. “These last two weeks you’ve either had your face buried in your computer, in a textbook or in a pillow passed out because you’re too tired to do anything.”

Riley felt taken aback as she sat there on the kitchen table chair, crossing her arms. “What am I supposed to do, Matthew? Ignore my responsibilities and write halfass papers and homework that I have to do in order to get my degree?”

“No, but you can take a break every once in a while,” he replied, walking back into his room and leaving the conversation. “All you care about is writing papers or studying for tests or getting a perfect grade on your homework assignments.”

“I’m sorry for caring about my grades, but I spent a lot of money to get both of my degrees so I’m not going to do a halfass job on my assignments.” Riley stood up out of her chair and walked after him, seeing him grabbing a fresh pair of socks from the dresser his tv was standing on. “Not all of us have rich parents who could easily pay for our tuition. Some of us have to work for what we want.”

Matthew shook his head again and scoffed. “You’re not getting it, Riley.”

“What am I not getting then? Please, actually give me an answer instead of some sarcastic smart ass response and tell me what you’re problem is?”

“My problem is you knew how stressed I was about this game and how much it would mean to me for you to be there and you didn’t show up until the third period.”

“I–” Riley stared at him, blinking. “How did–”

“Claire texted Jacob when you called her and said you were on your way. Said that you fell asleep in the library.” He shook his head as he brushed by her and back out of the bedroom. “You work yourself down to the bone, Riley and I get it, you want to graduate top of your class and stuff, but tonight was important and I really wanted you there.”

“It was an accident, Matthew…” she spoke, following behind him and crossing her arms, hugging them tight against her. “I was only supposed to take a quick nap–”

“You could’ve left when Kelsey did. I know you guys were studying together because Oscar said that she had left and came home so they could have dinner together.” He cut her off, putting on a pair of sneakers, tying his shoes before standing back up and looking at her. “She made it to the game on time because she probably knew it was important to him.”

Part of her couldn’t believe that they were arguing about something so small. The other part understood that he was upset on her missing most of his game…but it was an accident. He should be understanding of that, because she could’ve just gone straight home and told him she couldn't’ make it to his game. But she still tried to go and she begged with the stadium security to let her bring her bag in so she didn’t have to go back home to drop it off and come back, only to miss even more of the game.

She still tried.

“I didn’t do it on purpose, Matthew. It was an accident,” she replied, standing there with her arms crossed. “And I still showed up. I could’ve gone straight home but I showed up because I knew you wanted me to be there and it was an accident. I didn’t purposely miss your game.”

“No, but you didn’t come and eat dinner with me either. You could have, but you didn’t,” he said, looking at her. “Do you realize how much time we’ve actually spent together in the last two weeks? Time where you weren’t on your computer or asleep at the table because you fell asleep working on homework? Maybe a day or two and that’s pushing it.”

It felt like they were going in circles, whatever it was that they were arguing about. She spoke, he spoke, she spoke again– round and round and no solution in sight. It was frustrating beyond belief, but she’d never been in this sort of situation before– fighting with someone she was dating, because she’d never had a relationship before…he was her first real one– so how the hell was it supposed to be handled? Did she let him complain and that was it? Just apologize and assume it was fine? Argue back and let her know that she didn’t do it intentionally? Every option that went through her mind, didn’t have a clear solution.

Which is why she ended up just arguing back with him, which probably wasn’t the best idea.

“I’m sorry for wanting to focus on the education I’m paying for, Matthew. I get that your hockey game was important for you, but you’ve got like twenty freaking more to make up for the one I missed. You’ve got more games and another season after this, I have this semester and then I get my degree. Of course it’s going to take my attention away, because it means a lot to me–”

“Oh, it means a lot to you?” He asked, raising an eyebrow. “So what am I? Chopped liver?”

This time Riley was the one to laugh in disbelief, shaking her head as she brought her hands to her temples. “I can’t even deal with you right now. Do you even hear yourself? What do you want me to do, huh? Apologize? Because I am, I’m sorry I missed two periods of your game because I overslept in my nap after stressing about my paper and my capstone oral presentation to get a degree that means everything to me and my future. I’m sorry I wasn’t there to see you get your assist on Johnny’s goal or God forbid, shove someone into a board. But I had a bigger priority and at least I still tried to go, I even had to beg the damn security supervisors to hold my bag so they would let me in and I wouldn’t miss your entire game.” She exhaled heavily, looking back at the blue eyed blonde. “So no, you’re not chopped liver, but right now you’re being a jerk and I don’t know if I want to be around if you’re going to keep acting like one.”

He stood there in his spot looking at her for a few seconds more before walking back into his room and coming back out a few seconds later, now with a jacket on over his t-shirt. He walked over to the bar counter and grabbed his keys, his back still to her.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m going out to celebrate with some of the guys,” he said, keeping his back to her. “I wouldn’t want to bother you anymore while you do your work or make you hang around while I’m being a jerk.”

“That’s not–” she huffed, following after him as he headed towards the door. “That’s not what I–” Riley could barely get the words out before he was out the door, shutting it and locking it behind him and leaving her alone in his apartment. “Meant.”

Riley stared at his apartment door, hoping that he would come right back through it because he forgot something, because maybe then that could be another chance for them to settle their misunderstanding and not be angry at each other. But she couldn’t hear lingering footsteps on the other side of the door, nor was there any sign that someone was attempting to even unlock and open the door. She walked back over to the kitchen table, picking her phone up and unlocking it, calling Claire and bringing the phone to her ear.

“Hey Ri, what’s up?” She asked, music in the background.

“What are you doing tonight?” Riley asked, leaning against the wall, keeping her arms close to her.

“I’m going out with Jacob and the guys, we’re downtown at the bar!” She replied, slightly yelling into the phone a little bit. “Are you and Matt coming out?”

“No, well I mean, yeah,” Riley sighed, rubbing her forehead as she looked at her computer sitting there waiting for her to start working again. “He is, he just left. I…I’m tired so I’m just gonna crash here at his place.”

A few seconds passed and for a moment, Riley thought that maybe Claire hadn’t heard her. “You okay?” Big mistake number two tonight. Claire knew her well enough to be able to see through her lies even on a phone call.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Riley nodded, turning off the kitchen light and walking into Matthew’s bedroom. “Be safe tonight, have fun and I’ll talk to you later.”

“Alright, if you’re sure. Love you.”

“Love you too,” she replied, hanging up the call and then shutting the bedroom door behind her.

Today had been long and with that fight– their first ever– with Matthew, Riley found herself way too tired to sit down at the kitchen table and try to write her paper or go over her Capstone presentation. She grabbed some of the clothes that she had here before choosing one of his shirts from his year in the OHL with the London Knights as a top and made her way into the bathroom to take a shower. It was the best time to just let the stress and exhaustion wash away with the hot water and the soap. She contemplated sending Matt an ‘I’m sorry’ text, despite the fact that she had already apologized. She also contemplated calling Claire back and telling her that she had lied to her when she said she was fine, wanting to get her big sister's advice on how to deal with the situation since Claire was an expert in all things relationship.

But she did neither. Instead, after she got out of the shower, she brushed her hair and her teeth, got dressed and climbed into Matthew’s bed, turning his tv on and finding the Lifetime app she’d downloaded, clicking on Dance Moms and watching the old episodes until she found herself falling asleep.

Riley didn’t know how much time had passed or how long she’d been asleep, but she knew for a fact that she had been asleep because the cool chill from the room sweeping underneath the raised comforter and the movement of someone settling into the bed beside her had definitely woken her up. She grabbed onto the top of the comforter, tugging it back up above her shoulders as she rolled onto her left side and groaned at the disturbance.

“Riles,” Matthew whispered, placing a hand on her waist and rubbing the area softly. “Riles, are you awake?”

“No,” she mumbled, snuggling herself down into the mattress. “I’m sleeping.”

She heard him sigh as she felt him shift closer to her, the pillow she had her head resting on dipping down and then his hand moving up onto her right arm. “Can you wake up please? I want to talk…we need to talk.”

The thump of her heart against her chest when she heard those words was enough to wake her up enough for her heavy eyelids to start blinking. She reached out for her phone on the nightstand and tapped the screen to see the time. “Matthew, it’s 1:58 in the morning…this can’t wait for a few hours?”

“Actually no, it can’t,” he replied, rubbing his hand up and down her arm. “Please, Riles?”

Riley took a deep breath and exhaled, preparing herself for whatever this ‘we need to talk’ conversation was going to be and rolled over onto her otherside, coming face to face with Matthew. “You’re home early.”

“Yeah, well I wasn’t really having the best time,” he replied, keeping himself propped up onto his left elbow as he placed his hand back on her waist, keeping it there. “The guys kept ordering shots but I don’t know…I just didn’t feel like drinking.”

“You didn’t drink at all?” She asked, shocked.

Matthew sucked in his bottom lip as he shook his head. “Nope, I just kept having the bartender give me cups of water. I wasn’t in the mood to get drunk and celebrate, you know?”

Riley pouted, resting both of her hands beneath her pillow. “What? Are you going to say I ruined your celebration too?”

He chuckled softly, nodding his head. “I deserve that, I was a dick to you earlier and you didn’t deserve it. I know you still tried to make it to my game and I understand the pressure you’re under right now and it wasn’t fair of me to come for you like that about school.”

Still tired, Riley kept blinking and trying to comprehend what Matthew was saying. “Where’s this all coming from?”

Matthew looked at her, a nervous look on his face as he licked his lips and exhaled, closing his eyes for a few seconds before opening them again and looking at her. “I love you.” He must have seen the shocked look on her face even in the dim lighting from his tv screen because she could see his adam’s apple bob up and down with a nervous swallow. “I talked to Claire…well, more like she yelled at me–”

“I’m confused,” Riley said, starting to sit herself up.

“No, no, keep laying down,” he said, nudging her back down onto her side. “Claire asked me if you were really tired and I told her everything that happened and…well for one she chewed me a new one.”

“She tends to do that when she’s mad,” Riley nodded, keeping her focus on him.

“But she was right to do it, Riles, because she made me realize how what I said was unfair. I would have realized that by tomorrow or something…but she made me realize it sooner and then we got to talking about how this has been your dream since you were in middle school and you’ve been working your ass off ever since. And then she started doing that whole like therapist thing she does where she asks how you really feel–”

Riley laughed, tilting her head to the side. “She does that too. Pisses Brendan off more than anything.”

Matthew laughed softly. “Yeah, but uh…it works because she’s really good at it and she helped me realize that it wasn’t you being caught up in school or missing the first two periods of my game tonight that upset me, you know? It was me being so worked up about my performance and the game and then just…”

“Matt?” She asked, reaching out and resting her hand on his left bicep, squeezing it lightly and gaining his attention. “Breathe.”

He nodded, and took a deep breath and sighed. “I’m not mad about you almost missing my game, Riles. I’m a little upset you’re pushing yourself so hard on this school thing, but I understand that now, you know? But besides that, I’ve just…kind of been beating myself up inside about how I feel about you because…well…” He gulped again, looking at her. “I love you, Riles. I really do and it freaks me out because it’s only been a month and I didn’t want to scare you away or anything but I do. I love you and I’m tired of beating myself up about it and I told Claire that and she told me I needed to stop being an idiot and to come home and tell you, not her…so here I am. Stone cold sober and you don’t have to say it back, I’m not saying it to pressure you or anything but…well…yeah.”

Riley didn’t know how to reply. She’d only met Matthew officially for the first time in January. Sure, they’d been at events together, but that moment in the bar was the first time the two ever exchanged words. Then weeks after that night, they were on a set up blind date. Not too long after that, they were dating and now here he was, lying next to her in his bed and telling her that he loved her. Never in her life had she had someone who wasn’t a friend or family, tell her that they loved her. Sure, she’d had guys tell her that they liked her, but they never got to this point– this was uncharted territory.

Was familial love and relationship love the same? She knew she loved her parents and her siblings and her best friends, she recognized that feeling of love. But would it be any different for Matthew? She knew that she cared so much about him, just the same as she did her family and friends. But obviously, there was a difference and there were different ways that she cared for him than she did them. It was almost instinct for her to come over to his apartment instead of her own at the end of her day. She knew how he took his coffee and how he ate the same thing before every game. She knew where he liked to go on his days off if he wasn’t staying in bed. Whenever she felt anxious, just his touch alone could bring her at ease. Even just looking at him made her day so much bright. So does she love Matthew? Is that what all of these things that seemed to happen so fast in the last few months meant? Is that why she was absolutely terrified the first time that those three words slipped between his lips?

Yet when she looked at Matthew, that terrified feeling faded into the back, only leaving her thumping heartbeat in her chest in its wake and the temptation of saying those three words stuck on her lips. Her lips that were slowly turning up into a smile as she felt her cheeks heat up and her hand moved from his bicep up to his cheek, brushing her thumb against his beard.

“I love you too.”

DAY 108 – APRIL 18TH, 2022 [ SPONTANEOUS VACATION ]

“I can’t believe that you’ve been here for two years and you’ve never been to Banff,” Matthew laughed, shaking his head as they moved up in the line, each with a coffee from the starbucks in hand.

“I’ve always been busy,” Riley shrugged, taking a small sip of the hot coffee. “Besides, Claire was adjusting to her job and didn’t have a lot of vacation time between settling in on the weekends. Then she met Jacob and I was not third wheeling with those two.”

“Still,” he said, shaking his head. “Banff was one of the first things I did when I moved here. My mom and I came here and it’s one of my favorite places to go.”

“Oh?” Riley asked, raising her eyebrow. “Is this where you take all of your dates too?”

Matthew rolled his eyes as he bumped into her. “No, I don’t take all of my dates here, you dork. But, it’s so peaceful, you know? Just all of the nature…when you live in the city, especially back home in St. Louis, you just kind of forget about how beautiful it can be.”

“Touching,” she sighed, resting her hand over her heart. “That was so beautiful, I’m going to quote you on that for my instagram caption.”

He threw an arm over her shoulder and pulled her into his side, keeping her trapped. “You’re such a brat sometimes, you’re lucky I love you.”

“Mhhm,” she agreed, looking up at him as she stood on her tippy toes and kissed his lips softly. “So lucky.”

In an extremely rare occurrence, the Flames had the day off. A previously scheduled game was now going to be rescheduled due to an amount of covid cases on their opponents team, leaving them with no enough players to play. Meaning that Matthew and the Flames didn’t have to travel until tomorrow morning, when they’d fly to Nashville. Matthew came home from what was supposed to be him leaving for Chicago and woke her up, telling her they’d just had a quick practice and that he was free for the rest of the day and that she should get dressed because he wanted to take her somewhere fun.

Somewhere fun turned into grabbing breakfast from Tim Hortons and then Matthew driving the hour and a half from Calgary to Banff, the two of them listening to music and picking the other’s karaoke song, every so often doing a duet. It was a nice break from homework and stress, her one day off of classes where she was planning on sleeping the entire day away– she was actually being swept off to some of the prettiest mountains in Alberta, their first trip together as a couple.

Having been here plenty of times before, Riley let Matthew take the reins on what they would do. They grabbed another coffee at the Starbucks inside the building that was at  the base of the mountain before getting onto the Gondola. She was mesmerized by the sights of the snow covered ground and trees as they rode up the mountain. Never before had she seen such an amazing, jaw dropping sight and begrudgingly, she told Matthew that he was right. It was a beautiful view and one that she had been so easily to forget had existed because of how she spent a majority of her time in the city in a classroom and with her face in a computer.

They walked hand in hand down the boardwalk, stopping every so often to take pictures or to just take in the sights. Matthew had gotten stopped every so often by other people who were enjoying the view, talking to him about the season and the team and asking for a picture. Riley wasn’t bothered by it one bit and she offered to take the picture for them if they wanted. It was nice seeing Matthew in his element. He was such a people person and so outgoing and talkative, but she also knew very well that shy and quiet side of him when it was just the two of them in the apartment and lounging on the couch watching netflix. 

By the time they made it to Sanson’s peak, Riley could feel her face start to go numb from the cold and she was fully curled up into Matthew’s side as they looked out at the view. Snow was actively falling and yet she couldn’t take her focus off of the stretch of peaceful and beautiful nature in front of them. It was magical, like she was standing in the middle of one of those Hallmark Christmas movies her mom recorded for all of them to watch when they were together on Christmas break.

“It’s beautiful, Matthew,” she said, looking up at him as her head was resting against his chest. “Thank you for bringing us here.”

“Of course,” he said, kissing the top of her Flames beanie of his that she’d taken to wear. “Beautiful views for a beautiful girl.”

Riley laughed, shaking her head as she nudged him. “You’re so cheesy.”

“Jacob said the same thing when he saw that picture of us from the Super Bowl party taped up in my locker,” he smiled, shrugging. “And then I called him out for the same thing because I know he’s got a picture of him and Claire in there somewhere.”

“You have a picture of us in your locker?” She asked, blinking slowly. “Really?”

Matthew nodded. “I’ve got pictures of my parents and my grandparents and siblings too…all of the people that I love and who mean the world to me.”

“You’re such a cheeseball,” she laughed, wrapping her arms around his waist and pressing her face against his chest, reveling in the feeling of his arm around her as she looked out at the winter scene.

She always teased her mom and Claire for loving those Hallmark Christmas movies so much. There was something so ridiculous about the same storyline in different movies. Boy meets girl, girl ignores boy, some weird coincidence brings them together and they find that they’ve got a lot more in common than they thought and then the feelings start and everything seems so full of happiness and love. Then, the big climax of the movie, something goes wrong, but in the end it all works out. Every movie was so different, but also so similar. It was magical, romantic and now that she had Matthew…part of her understood why they loved those movies so much or why Claire seemed to always put herself all into her relationships.

Because here, right now with Matthew holding onto her as she stared out at the mountains and the trees with the snow falling around them, Riley had never felt more at peace than she did in this very moment.

DAY 150 – MAY 30TH, 2022 [ A MOST IMPORTANT DAY ]

She’d been here before– sitting in a stuffy auditorium surrounded by hundreds of students, wearing a not so comfortable robe and shifting every so often in her chair to make sure that her butt didn’t fall asleep while she listened to the speakers talk. She had her bachelor’s degree, so she knew how a graduation ceremony would go and how long it could take, but right now everything felt so different.

Her gown wasn’t so different than the one she wore when she got her bachelor’s degree, aside from the velvet that lined the master hood. Her cap was the exact same, though this time instead of it being decorated with a nod towards her next journey to the University of Calgary like her cap had been when she received her master’s, this one was decorated with light blue scrapbook paper that covered the black of the cap, sticky flowers on the two side corners and in the middle, in white painted letters (thanks to Claire), was a quote from One Tree Hill, many she had scoured over what to pick, but one that Matthew was found.

“So for now I say goodbye to this chapter of my life and I look forward to what comes next.”

A cap that was decorated with Kelsey and Claire sitting at the kitchen table in Matthew’s apartment, Jacob, Oscar and Matthew sitting in the living room and drinking beer, relaxing and sulking slightly at the way their season had ended only four days earlier. And like she had been feeling the weeks leading up to graduation, Riley sat there feeling a sort of mourning for the community she’d be leaving behind once she went back home to St. Louis once she graduated– scared of leaving behind her friends and the unknown of her future.

It was a feeling she’d tried to hide that she was experiencing it, but one that Matthew had called her out on many times and she’d expressed to him her doubts and fears and overall worries…which is why he suggested that quote, and how easily it fit in along with all of the times he’d talked her off the edge of fear.

And while that feeling had been hanging over her the moment she woke up that morning in her own apartment, having had a sleepover with Kelsey so the two could get ready together before heading off to campus to prepare for the ceremony, once she heard them announce her name, hometown and degree and crossed the stage, the cheers of her friends and family and classmates echoing in her ears….she felt hopeful. All she could think about was meeting up with her family afterwards, seeing the smiles on their faces. She looked forward to playfully teasing her parents about wanting to take so many pictures. Sure, she’d experienced this all too familiar feeling before…only this time, there was a big difference.

She’d be greeting Matthew as well.

When the ceremony came to an end and the cheers and applause of her peers, their friends and families and faculty alike bounced off of the auditorium walls, Riley was one of the first students to make a beeline for where they were instructed to pick up their actual paper diplomas from tables set off to the side. She was fourth in line at her respective last name table, assuming the other three students were sat right on the aisle of their rows and her phone was going off, presumably her family group chat texting her on where they would meet her once she made her way outside.

With diploma in hand (well, in the leather diploma folder), Riley maneuvered her way through the crowds of students and guests who were still filed into the auditorium, eager to get outside to meet up with everyone. Her eyes were squinting the moment she stepped outside into the summer day, the cap that was still on her head providing no shade for her eyes, leaving her to shield them from the hot sun using her free hand as she tried to see if she could spot anyone familiar.

“Riles!” She heard Matthew call out, yet she didn’t see him as she looked around. “Riles, over here!” His voice was a little louder now, allowing her to figure out what direction it was at least coming from. She looked to her right to see Matthew waving his left hand in the air and walking over to her with a smile on his face. Immediately she noticed that he was wearing her favorite shirt of his– the lavender dress shirt– coupled with gray slacks and the YSL belt she jokingly teased him for wearing all of the time. 

Riley walked in his direction, quickening her pace the closer she got before she reached him and jumped in his arms, wrapping her own around his neck and pressing her face into the side of his neck as he wrapped his left arm around her, supporting her. “Did they ditch you? I thought you were supposed to sit with Claire, Jacob and my parents?”

Matthew placed her back down onto the ground, keeping his left hand at the small of her back as he leaned down and kissed her before standing back up. “Well, when Oscar and I finally got a parking spot, Claire said some lady threw a huge fit about them saving two seats, so we ended up sitting on a whole different side of the auditorium with Kelsey’s family.”

“I’m surprised Claire didn’t throw her down the steps.”

“She sounded like she was a few seconds away from doing that when we were on the phone, but I told her it was fine and that I’d meet up with them,” he held out the bouquet of white daisies and deep pink, along with red roses and smiled. “These are for you. I know you don’t really like roses, but my mom lectured me about how I couldn’t not get my girlfriend roses on such a big day.”

“They’re beautiful, Matt,” Riley took a small whiff of the fresh flowers and looked back at him with a smile. “Thank you, and I’ll be sure to tell your mom thank you as well.”

“Please, because I’m 90 percent sure my dad stopped her from lecturing me about how roses aren’t just roses and all of the colors have different meanings…it was a lot,” he took a deep breath as he rested his hands on his hips and sighed, shaking his head. “But enough about that, let’s go find everyone!”

Riley held his hand as the two of them made their way over to the meeting spot that her family had agreed on beforehand– about halfway between the parking lot and the auditorium– and she couldn’t stop thinking about how this was going to be the moment where Matthew would meet her parents for the first time. A bad case of food poisoning mixed in with traveling had kept them from meeting Matthew when they flew in the day before what would be the last game of the Flames season. Then with end of season stuff, exit media and the chaos of upcoming graduation– there was just never a free time for them to meet.

Until now, and now, she was absolutely petrified of them meeting. She wasn’t all that sure why, because she’d seen her parents meet Jacob and both of Claire’s high school boyfriends, not to mention Brendan’s girlfriend. She knew her mom would be just as welcoming and heartfelt as Chantal was when Riley had met her and she knew that her dad would immediately play the tough guy, only to melt seconds later. She knew it, she’s seen it– and yet she was more nervous about Matthew meeting her parents than she had been about potentially tripping on stage when she walked across it.

She snuck a look at Matthew from the corner of her eye who was talking about how he and Oscar had spent all morning making sure the catering was confirmed to be delivered to Kelsey’s parents house since they were hosting the party and how he had no idea how his mom ever planned an entire party or why she enjoyed planning them so much because he was stressed only because of food that he wasn’t even in charge of cooking. She felt her nerves waver away as she zoned in on how he was swinging their conjoined hands at a comfortable pace and had his other hand snug in his pant pocket, walking with total confidence and grace that just seemed to be so infectious that it was somehow washing over her.

“Riley Anne Thompson you little genius!” Claire yelled, easily gaining their attention. She was standing straight ahead of them just a few feet away and waving her hands in the air. “Get your butts over here!”

Matthew chuckled and Riley looked up at him with a pout. “Stop it right now.”

“I just think it’s funny, you know? Your initials spell rat and everyone thinks I am one,” he squeezed her hand supportively. “Almost makes it seem like it was meant to be, hm?”

Once they got close enough, Matthew let go of Riley’s hand and nodded at her to hand him her diploma and flowers so she could hug her family. She wasted no time greeting each of her parents with a hug before moving onto her brother and then both Claire and Jacob. When the congratulations and the hugs were done, she turned around with a nervous smile and walked the small distance where Matthew had been standing and stood beside him with a proud smile.

“Mom, Dad, this is Matthew, my boyfriend” she smiled, looking away from Matthew and over to her parents. “Matthew, my mom and dad.”

“Otherwise known as Elizabeth and Michael,” her mom smiled, breaking the distance and greeting Matthew with a hug. “And we’ve heard a ton about you from Claire and Riley both. It’s very nice to meet you.”

“It’s nice to meet you too, ma’am,” Matthew replied, hugging her before turning his attention to Riley’s dad as her mom pulled away from the hug, extending his hand out towards her dad. “And you too as well, sir.”

Riley swallowed the knot in her throat as she looked at her Dad, who, as predicted, was pulling his tough guy act with the squinty eyes and stone faced demeanor. She told Matthew not to be so polite and nervous, because she knew her Dad would see it coming from a mile away– and there they were…the slight awkward tension. She watched as her dad looked at Matthew’s hand and then back up at him before cracking a smile and reaching out to shake his hand.

“It’s nice to meet you as well, Matthew,” her dad said, adding another pure father moment by patting Matthew’s shoulder as well. “I’m glad to see that someone was finally able to break down those walls of Riley’s. I was starting to think that thing was going to surpass the great wall of China–”

“Michael!”

“Well, you survived the meeting,” Claire whispered, resting her chin on Riley’s shoulder and trying not to stifle a laugh. “Now all you’ve got to do is survive the party.”

“It’ll be fine,” Riley replied, shrugging as she looked back at Matthew who was now making small talk with their dad and brother. “I think they love him already.”

And things were fine, totally and beyond fine. Once they caught up with Kelsey, Oscar and her family, both groups made their way back to Kelsey’s parents home only a short distance away and from the moment they pulled up to the house and as the time ticked on, the party was in full swing. Riley got a front row seat to seeing her dad and Matthew talk about who knew what, but anytime she snuck a glimpse she felt her heart swell and she couldn’t help but smile and wonder if this feeling was what he meant by when he told her how much he loved seeing her get along with his mom and sister the first time they met and she sat with them at one of his games.

She sat back in enjoyment as she watched Matthew entertain some of Kelsey’s nieces and nephews with various yard games– limbo being the one where he dramatically fell to the ground to make all of the kids giggle because “you’re so bad at this! Look, it’s not that hard!” Or when he and Oscar gave a joint “proud boyfriend” speech after the proud parents had. How he and Jacob both accepted Bredan’s challenge of eating their wings the fastest, then proceeding to win and down her water when the heat got too much. Then getting her a refill, of course.

The drinks were flowing and as the sun started to set and everyone continued to have a good time, Riley was talking to Kelsey about their next steps. Kelsey had managed to get a job with a junior hockey team as a physical trainer in Calgary, following that she passed her certification and that she was also considering getting her PhD as well, though she wasn’t all too certain about that yet. She was excited for her friend to hear about all of the set plans that she had now that they had graduated, but Riley would be lying if she said she didn’t feel totally unprepared. Sure, she looked into jobs and applied. Some were here in Calgary, others were back home in St. Louis, but she’d yet to hear back from any of them. But she wouldn’t let that get in the way of how proud and happy she was for Kelsey. Especially since earlier before graduation when she saw her mentor, they had a conversation and her mentor said she would help look around for jobs she might be interested in.

Riley took a small sip from her beer bottle and was about to reply to Kelsey’s question about if she and Matthew had any summer plans when she saw the man of the hour himself come walking over from the back porch, smiling at her and making a ‘come here’ motion with his right hand as he held his beer in his left.

“It seems that I’ve been summoned by the needy boyfriend, so I’ll be right back,” she smiled, putting her beer down into the cup holder of her lawn chair and standing up, meeting him halfway as they stood by the bonfire. “Yes?”

Matthew held out his hand and nodded at it. “Grab my hand,” he brought his bottle up to his lips as he took another sip, watching and waiting for her to grab his hand.

“Why? What’s the trick?” She asked, hesitantly reaching her hand out.

He huffed, letting his smile fall as he looked at her. “Just grab it.” Riley placed her hand on his, eyeing him suspiciously as he just smiled and held her hand before pulling her closer and wrapping his left arm around her waist, looking down at her. “Gotcha, now you’ve gotta dance with me.”

“Matthew,” Riley whined, leaning her head back as she pouted. “You know I don’t like slow dancing.”

“Yeah, but I also know that you like slow dancing when it’s with me,” he smiled, nodding at her. “Now would it kill you to act like you love me and put your other hand on me?”

Riley smiled, shrugging. “It might.”

“You’re a brat.”

“Where do you think I learned it from?” Riley replied, rolling her eyes as she rested her right hand on his arm.

“Claire,” he replied, the two of them laughing soon after before letting it fade out as they both just swayed back and forth. “Oh look, I started a trend!”

Riley looked around them and saw that Oscar had grabbed Kelsey to dance, the same with Jacob and Claire and the parents. She shook her head, looking back at him. “Maybe everyone just got tired of standing around.”

“Orrrrr,” he smiled, stepping back and twirling her unsuspectingly. “They think we’re a cute couple and it’s super romantic and they too want to be cute and romantic.”

Riley just laughed as he brought her back into him, fanning his hand out against her back. “Okay, whatever you say.”

The two of them swayed there, Riley feeling herself start to relax against Matthew’s chest and starting to focus on the sound of his heartbeat echoing inside of his chest. “So are you going to tell me what had you so upset?” Matthew spoke quietly just so they could hear.

“Hm?” She asked, keeping her eyes closed as she zoned back in. “I wasn’t upset.”

“You looked upset while talking to Kelsey. That’s why I came off of the porch and swept you off your feet with my incredible dance moves.” He leaned himself back to look at her and tilted his head to the side slightly. “So?”

Riley opened her eyes, took a deep breath and exhaled, shrugging her shoulders. “We were talking about what we were going to do now that we were done with school and she was telling me about all the stuff she’s got set in stone and planned and I don’t know…I just felt,” she paused, shaking her head. “Nevermind, it’s dumb.”

“No it’s not,” he replied, looking at her. “Your feelings aren’t dumb, Riles.”

“It’ll just make me sound like I’m jealous that she’s got all these plans set in stone, and maybe part of me is because I’ve applied to five jobs and haven’t heard a single whisper of news. But I’m not jealous, not really…I’m proud of her and happy for her because she’s my friend.”

“But you wish you had some sort of plan set in stone?”

“Exactly,” she mumbled, pouting slightly as she looked over to where Kelsey and Oscar were at. “But more than anything I’m happy for her, you know?”

“You’ll hear back soon, Riles. I just know it,” Matthew said, pulling her closer to him again. “And they’ll be lucky to have you.”

Riley rolled her eyes again in a playful manner as she tried to fight back her smile. “You have to say that, you’re–”

Matthew leaned in quickly, pressing his mouth against hers and cutting her words off with a kiss, pulling back just barely before kissing her two more times, smiling more into each one before he pulled back completely, a smile on his face as he rested his forehead against hers and looked into her eyes. “Anyone would be lucky to have you work for them, Riles. And I’m not just saying that because I’m your boyfriend. I mean it. You’re a catch, got it?”

Riley smiled, nodding her head. “Go it.”

“Good,” he replied, kissing her forehead before Riley moved her head down to his chest again and he held her close once more. “It’ll all work out, Riles. Everything you want in your life…it’ll all work out. I just know it.”

She smiled as she snuggled her head further against him, taking in the smell of his cologne and closing her eyes. She could picture it so easily– her working in her dream field, coming home from a day at work to their shared apartment, more vacations in Banff, matching playoff jackets with her sister and Kelsey…a life with Matthew at home in St. Louis and in their seasonal home in Calgary. She had been filled with so much self doubt just minutes earlier, but with Matthew’s assurance, she believed it could come true.

DAY 184 – JULY 4TH [ CURRENT DAY ]

“Ri?” Claire said, her voice sounding distant. “Riley!”

“Huh, what?” Riley asked, zoning back out of her thoughts as she looked at her sister who had finally stopped shaking her shoulder.

“I said we’re here.”

Riley looked out of her back passenger window to see the all too familiar apartment building. The knot that was in her stomach was now extending up to her throat as she stared at the building that Jacob was pulled up in front of, unable to get her brain to tell her hand to reach for her door handle to open the door and let herself out.

“You don’t have to do this right now, Ri,” Claire spoke softly, resting a hand on top of hers and giving it a light squeeze. “Jacob can always do it.”

“Yeah Riley,” Jacob spoke from the driver's seat, nodding his head as he turned slightly to look at her. “I can just drop it off for you when we go back to the apartment after dinner. I’ll drop you guys off and then come back here.”

The offer was enticing and for a moment, Riley considered taking it. But only for a moment, because it wasn’t just dropping it off that she needed to do, there was something else she needed to go if she was going to survive the rest of her summer and the months that followed.

She cleared her throat, shaking her head and exhaled. “No, that’s okay I–” she turned away from the window and looked at Claire, Jacob and Brendan. “I can do it.”

Brendan looked at Claire before looking back at Riley. “Are you—“

“Yes, Brendann…I’m sure.” She pulled on her door handle and opened the door, making sure she had her purse before she unbuckled her seatbelt and got out of the car and stepping out into the sidewalk. “I’ll be right back and please…just stay here?”

They nodded and she shut the door behind her, turning back around and staring up at the apartment building she’d been to so many times. It was hard to believe that this would be the last time that she walked through those double doors and greet the receptionist behind the counter with a smile. If she remembered correctly, Shannon would be working today. She’d come to know all of the people who worked behind the desks' names, even from the few months she’d been around. They almost became like good friends to her, so it was weird that this would also possibly be the last time she ever saw any of them again.

Nervously, she pulled on the door handle and walked into the lobby of the apartment building, seeing that no one was standing behind the desk which she was extremely grateful for since that meant no awkward conversation was needed. She quickly walked across the lobby and towards the elevators, pressing the up arrow and sighing in relief when the doors opened immediately. She walked into the elevator, shutting the door behind her and holding the key fob against the scanner that allowed the elevator to move up to the residential floors before pressing number ten. The elevator moved slowly and she crossed her arms, hugging them to her chest as she leaned against the corner thinking about the last time she’d been in this building.

Two days ago in fact, and part of her didn’t want to come back here so soon but she knew that she was leaving Calgary tomorrow morning and while she could do what she was doing simply by mail…she couldn’t bring herself to do it. It seemed so impersonal, which things had never been.

Matthew’s family had come up to Calgary to take in some of the summer sights since the season was over. Riley loved his family and how down to earth they all were. She especially loved seeing the natural chirping and playful teasing between Matthew, his brother and their dad. His brother, Brady, had brought along his girlfriend and it was a short vacation in Calgary before everyone was headed off to Greece for their annual family vacation. A vacation that Riley would be joining, and one she was hesitant to when Matthew had originally invited her along because it was a family vacation and they’d only started dating. But he had said that he was going to ask her anyway after checking with his parents, but his parents beat him to the punch when his mom had asked publicly in the family group chat if he was going to bring her along.

Riley did insist on paying for her part in the trip, but both of his parents refused to accept her part, and she bargained to at least pay for her plane ticket— which she did. They were all out to dinner when Riley had stepped out because she’d gotten a missed call from her mentor. So she excused herself from the table and went outside of the restaurant to listen to the voicemail her mentor had left behind and when she was done listening to it— she stood there in disbelief.

The job her mentor had her apply for, one that Riley thought there was no chance in the world that she could get…well, she got it. Her mentor had called her to tell her that their contact with the hospital said that she had been chosen as one of the two other applicants to be hired to fill the pediatric occupational therapist positions they had available and thought she would pass the word on before they had sent her the official email, which she would get the next morning.

It was hard to explain how excited she was about the news. It’d been a little over a month since she’d graduated College and had yet to hear back from any of the jobs she applied to and yet there she was— getting her first piece of good news from the job she never thought she’d get hired on for. And then the nerves set in— Boston. She’d obviously have to move away from St. Louis and away from Calgary. And as she made her way back to dinner, she determined that she was too nervous to share the good news with everyone at the table. Because while announcing that she got a job was good news, announcing that she would be moving states away from her boyfriend didn’t seem like it would go over as well.

So…she saved the conversation for that night as her and Matthew were getting ready to go to bed. She had settled for the night before he did, he was still walking around his room and getting stuff ready for both his move back down to St. Louis for the summer, but also making sure he had whatever stuff he’d be packing for the trip to Greece later on. By the time he got into bed, he closed his eyes and just laid there, exhaling before opening his eyes and looking at her.

“What?” He asked, head and upper back leaning against his headboard.

“Hm?” She replied, zoning back in on him. “I didn’t say anything.”

“No, but you’re staring at me.” He laughed, resting his hands on his stomach and interlocking his fingers. “I know I’m hot, but try not to get your drool all over my pillow, hm?”

Riley rolled her eyes and laughed. “I’ll try not to.”

He smiled softly, lolling his head to the side and looking at her. “But really Riles, what’s up? You’ve seemed…off all night, since we got to and left dinner, actually.”

She rested her own hands on top of the comforter, twiddling with her thumbs as she thought about what she was going to say. Her immediate thought was to just tell him that she was tired, because tonight had been so, so good and fun and relaxing, she didn’t want her announcement to make it all crash down. But she knew that wouldn’t be fair to him for her to tell him any other time than now, because after all…she didn’t know when it was that she’d need to move to Boston.

“Remember the group of jobs that my mentor had me apply for? And I told you there was one that was way out of my league and I didn’t think I’d get it, but she had me apply anyway?” Riley spoke, looking at her hands.

“Yeah, did you hear back from any of them?” He sounded so nonchalant and the fact that he wouldn’t see this coming was enough for the familiar feeling of prickling tears to start to form in her eyes.

“I did, right before dinner. She called and uh, well…I got the job that I didn’t think I’d get,” she said, swallowing the knot in her throat as she looked at him. “The one in Boston…I–I got it.”

He sat himself up, a big smile on his face. “What? Riles, that's awesome!” He reached over and draped his arm over her shoulders, tugging her into him as he hugged her, pulling back and looking at her again. “I’m so proud of you, this is great! Why didn’t you say anything at dinner? That’s something to celebrate!”

Riley just stared at him, not wanting to say the words. The silence spoke what she couldn’t say and like a movie, she watched the realization dawn on him and if hearing him be so excited for her and proud of her wasn’t enough to make the burning feeling of tears in her eyes stronger, it was seeing his proud, beaming smile start to fade. Back when she had applied for jobs, most of which were either in St. Louis or Calgary, they had a conversation about what they were going to do with their relationship. Matthew had done long distance before and in his eyes, it was just something that never worked out, even if both parties tried their best to make it work.

St. Louis was one thing, but Boston was another. He lived in St. Louis three to four months out of the year. If she stayed there, things could have been easier, just like they would have been easier if she got a job in Calgary. But Boston? Sure, he had family there, but they only visited once or twice a year, many times in the summer. The summer was his time to relax at home with his friends and family, catch up on what he missed while he was in Calgary for the previous eight to nine months. It wasn’t realistic to ask of him to sacrifice any time at home, to spend his summer with her in Boston so they could have time together too.

The thought of the end had been in her mind the moment what Boston really meant had sunken in as she had walked back to their dinner table earlier.

This, her and Matthew, the last five to six months– it was done.

“Say something,” she whispered, feeling her bottom lip tremble as the tears blurred her vision. “Please?”

“Do you know when you have to be there?” He asked, clearing his throat as he tried to wipe away any sign of disappointment that she’d already seen.

Riley shook her head, sitting herself up fully and sitting criss cross applesauce, keeping her hands rested in her lap. “No, I’ll probably find out tomorrow because that’s when I’m supposed to get the official email.”

“Well, we can hold off for a few months until you have to move, right?” He nodded, clearing his throat again before taking a deep breath and exhaling, placing his left hand on top of her hands. “Unless that’s something you don’t want to do? What do you want to do, Riles?”

Oh, he must’ve seen her reaction to that suggestion. It wasn’t a bad one, but it wasn’t an eager nod…it was more of a frown, like she knew it wasn’t going to work. “I don’t know,” she spoke softly, holding onto his hand as she looked at him. “Any chance your whole view on long distance relationships changed?”

The shake of his head was subtle, but enough to send her heart plummeting in her chest. There was no holding back the tears that had been filling her eyes from falling down her face as the reality sank in. How was this the way everything was going to end? Why were these cards handled? What kind of being running the universe would put them on the other’s path and then split them to go down separate ways just when everything was going great? Neither of them wanted to end their relationship, but there was no way that would work out for them if they chose to stay in it? The hopelessness of it all felt like it was pulling her down and she was clawing at the surface for small gasps of air so she could make it through this unscathed.

“I–” he paused, clearing his throat as he kept his focus on their hands, an intense focus that Riley recognized as his attempt not to cry. He kept that same focus the first time they watched Dear John together, because she’d never seen it.

She bawled like a baby, he came close to, but was trying very, very hard not to.

“I don’t want you to not be excited about this,” he spoke slowly and clearly, trying to keep his voice clear from emotion. “Because this is big Riles, this is what you’ve been working for. And I know that right now, this…this sucks, but this is what you want to do, you know? This job…this is it.”

Riley sniffled as she reached up with her left hand and wiped away the tears from her cheeks. “I don’t want to– this,” she sniffled again, shaking her head. “I don’t want this to e-end, but Matt–”

“I know,” he said, breaking his concentration on her hands and looking at her, tears in his eyes. “But I would be doing you a huge disservice if I let this continue on, because Riles…I don’t want it to end either, but I’d rather it end where we both still love each other than rather we try to stick it out and we end up hating each other because the distance doesn’t work.”

Tears continued to roll down her face as her mouth trembled. Matthew reached up with his left hand and wiped her cheeks before keeping his hand against her cheek. “I can’t even imagine a life where I don’t think you’re the greatest person in the world.”

She leaned herself over into his arms, curling up against his chest and letting him wrap his arms around her as he held her while she cried. The sobs were quiet, as she didn’t want to wake up Taryn, who was sleeping on the couch just outside of his bedroom door, but they were heavy sobs escaping from the depths of her chest she hadn’t even known existed. Sobs that were shaking her body as they exited her mouth and vibrated against his chest where she had her face pressed into his shirt. Matthew just held her, resting his cheek on top of her head and rubbing her back, letting her cry as he tried not to let her know he was crying too. But she could hear the difference in his breathing and feel the deep vibrations in his chest from him trying his best to hold in his own, small sobs.

Once they both calmed down, she pulled herself out of his arms and wiped her eyes with her hands, sniffling and looking at him. Only the moment he made eye contact with her, the waterworks were working again. “It’s just a right person wrong time, thing Riles. We’ll figure it out,” he said, reaching out and tucking hair behind her ear. “These things always work out, you’ve read enough of those books of yours to know this.”

“I love you,” she sniffled, wiping at her eyes as the tears kept falling.

Matthew smiled softly, leaning in and holding his right hand at the back of her head as he kissed her forehead. “I love you too, Riles.” He rested his forehead against hers before kissing it again and then pulling back with teary eyes and his dimpled smile. “Does this mean Taryn and I are about to fifth and sixth wheel our parents and Brady and Emma’s Greece vacation?”

Riley laughed, sniffling again as she nodded. “Probably. I don’t think…I mean, Greece it wouldn’t–”

“Relax, Riles…I understand,” he nodded, his smile falling into a smaller one. “But hey, just because we’re not dating anymore doesn’t mean we can’t still try to be friends, right?”

God, hearing the word friends was so heart crushing, even if she’d known this possibility was in the running. “Does that even work?” She asked, wiping her nose. “In the movies it alway goes wrong–”

“Well, we wouldn’t try to be friends right away, because that definitely wouldn’t work,” he said, shaking his head. “But…maybe we can try to take a break for a bit from talking to each other? A month or two? Then we can try to talk on a friendly, non-romantic, I want to rip off your clothes and jump your bones, basis?”

This time Riley laughed a genuine laugh. The stomach cramping, butterflies laugh only Matthew could make her do. “You’re a dork,” she smiled, nudging him as she settled down and took a deep breath, exhaling. “But yeah…I guess we can try that. There’s no harm right? And it should be easy. We became friends before dating–”

“Well, technically I tried to make friends with you at the bar and you shut me down.”

“You were flirting with me from the start, don’t even try it,” she smiled, pointing at him before letting her hand rest back into her laugh with a sniffle. “But really, Matthew…I want to try it. Because this,” she motioned between them. “This friendship and relationship felt really special, and I don’t want to lose that.”

“It’s a deal then,” Matthew smiled, extending out his hand for her to shake. “A month with no contact whatsoever, and then we’ll come back and try to be friends, right?”

Riley looked at his hand, realizing that if she shook it, it would seal the deal on her relationship with Matthew ending. But she meant what she said, this was special and she didn’t want to lose it. So she grabbed his hand and shook it, nodding her head. “It’s a deal.”

“Great,” he smiled softly, still shaking her head.

“Great,” she replied, feeling him squeeze her hand before he let it go. She took a deep breath and exhaled, feeling the dried tears on her face and the congestion in her nose from sniffling. “I need a shower, I feel all…gross.”

Matthew tossed his blankets to the side, nodding his head. “I’ll set you out a towel and start it for you. You can toss your stuff in the hamper and–”

“Can you wash my hair for me?” She asked, getting out of bed and following him into the bathroom. “Just one last time, please? We don’t have to do anything, but–”

“Of course, Riles,” he nodded, smiling as he opened the shower door and reached in, turning the water on. “You know I’d do anything for you.”

The ding of the elevator brought Riley out of her thoughts and she looked up to see the red 10 signaled on the screen, meaning she’d finally reached the floor where Matthew’s apartment was. She stepped off of the elevator and dug into her purse to find her copy of his apartment key, grasping the red rubber spiral keychain that the key was on in her hand hard enough to where she could feel it leaving an imprint in her palm. She felt herself start to slow down as she reached his apartment, her feet feeling heavy and her heartbeat slowing in pace until she found herself face to face with his door.

She knew he wasn’t home, Jacob himself said that Matthew was out with his parents doing some sightseeing until later tonight. They’d be flying out the day after tomorrow, when Riley would already be back home in St. Louis. She was thankful that they weren’t all flying out the same day. It was awkward enough yesterday morning after she’d left before breakfast and Matthew was left to tell Taryn and then his parents, Brady and Emma alone about why she had gone and how their relationship was no more and she’d no longer be in attendance on their family vacation. She really didn’t need to have a run in on the same flight either.

Riley pulled the key out of her purse, unlocking the door and opening it. She paused in place, listening in for any sound of life within the apartment, just in case the plans had changed, but she was greeted with silence. In relief, Riley walked into the apartment and shut the door behind her, turning back to face the open apartment and standing in place. Matthew had given her some time yesterday afternoon to come by with Claire and grab the stuff she had here, so she knew nothing of hers was here– but it still felt like home.

There wasn’t a single space in this apartment that she could look at and now have some sort of memory or picture a moment that she and Matthew had shared. She slowly walked further into the apartment, bypassing the bar counter and the kitchen table where she had opted to leave what she came to leave, there. But instead, she made her way to his bedroom, not wanting it to be so public whenever it was that he came across it. At least here, he would have some privacy.

She walked over to his bed and placed her copy of his apartment key down onto the blue comforter, reaching back into her purse and pulling out an envelope with his name on it. Inside of it was a letter that she’d written to him. It talked a lot about how she was thankful that he’d come into her life and that she was sorry for ignoring him that night at the bar. It brushed over the memories that they made and how much fun she’d had in the few short months, even describing how those months felt like a lifetime in the best possible way. She had signed off with a ‘see you in a month, I promise I won’t ignore you this time when you try to be my friend’ and a smiley face followed by a simple signature of her name, ‘Riley.’ But at the very bottom of the letter was a separate sign off. A p.s. note that she felt, despite their attempts to be friends, she felt was needed.

“P.S. Thank you for showing me how I deserved to be loved. Just know that you will always be the first guy I’ve ever genuinely and rightfully loved. Love Always, Riles.”

She pulled one last thing out of her purse, the copy of ‘Dear John’ that she had bought after he made her watch the movie. As someone who almost always preferred to read the book first before watching any tv or movie adaptation, Matthew insisted that she forgo the whole process and just watch the movie with him. Little did he know, she was already ordering it off of Amazon and read it in one sitting once it arrived at her apartment. On the cover, she left a sticky note with a simple message of “now read the book, i promise it’s just as good :)” followed by a bunch of page numbers, but only two of which were highlighted, simply because they were two of her now favorite quotes that just seemed oh so fitting for their situation, ironic too since it was one of his favorite movies.

“In our time together, you claimed a special place in my heart, a place that I will carry with me forever and that no one can replace” and “Our story has three parts; a beginning, a middle and an end. And while that’s how all stories play out, I still can’t believe ours didn’t last forever.”

Cheesy? Sure, but she knew that he would find some appreciation for it. Once she made sure that he would be able to find them, she took a deep break and looked around the room one last time. This was where everything had come to an end, in this very room. Where she cried and cried until she fell asleep on her last night here in his arms. It should hurt her heart being in this room, but just like stepping foot into his apartment…it felt like home. A warm, fuzzy feeling was inside of her chest, trying its best to cover up the ache and the heaviness she’d been feeling nonstop since later Saturday night. She closed her eyes and took a deep, calming breath before opening them and exhaling, taking the first step to walk out of his room and not letting herself stop and slow down to take in the apartment one last time, because then she knew she would have the hardest time trying to leave.

When she opened the door, she turned the small lock on the inside doorknob so the door would lock behind her and she paused in place. It was hard trying to convince herself not to take one last look, but she caved in, wanting to say goodbye even just in her mind to a place that’d become a safe place for her. She only allowed herself a few moments before she walked out of the apartment and shut the door behind her, making sure that it was locked. Then, she booked it like hell to the elevator, never taking another look, not even when she got into the elevator, forcing herself to stand in front of the buttons as she pressed the lobby button, her lack of having the key fob keeping her from going onto any other floor, even though she wasn’t going to.

The moment the elevator doors opened on the lobby, she kept her focus straight ahead where she could still see Jacob’s car parked out front. She bypassed the still empty receptionist desk and quickened her pace, feeling her heart race in her chest as she pushed open the door and walked out into the summer heat, the sunlight hitting her face and making her squint her eyes. Her chest was rising and falling fast as if she was suffocating with the memory she was leaving behind as she left the apartment one last time. And once she stood outside, she was able to take a deep breath, feeling her chest fully expand and deflate as she exhaled.

“Hey Ri, you good?” Brendan asked, his window rolled down as he now sat in her seat.

“Yeah,” she nodded, taking a deep breath and exhaling again before turning back and looking over her shoulder at the apartment building, her eyes instantly going to where the tenth floor would be. “I think I will be.”

DAY 203 – JULY 22ND, 2022 [ TRICKED RECONCILIATION ]

“I already told you earlier” Riley said, looking at Claire and Brendan as she laid her book down onto her stomach. “I don’t want to go and you can’t make me. I’m literally 24-years-old.”

Brendan snorted, leaning in her doorway. “I told you she wouldn’t go, I don’t know why you bothered trying to–”

Claire turned around to face their younger brother, pointing at him. “Go wait in the living room, we’ll be right out.”

“Fine,” Brendan held his hands up in defense as he stood up straight and turned around and walked down the hall and eventually down the stairs and out of view, leaving just Riley and Claire there in Riley’s room.

Claire double checked to make sure he was out of sight before she closed the bedroom door behind her and then made her way over to Riley’s closet. “You’re wasting your time, Claire–”

“No, you’re wasting your time,” Claire replied, opening her closet doors and skimming through the clothes. “I know you’re still upset about the way things ended with Matthew but you leave for Boston in a month and a half and you haven’t done anything besides lay in bed and read your books since you got home from Calgary.”

“I’m not upset about Matthew,” Riley said, resting her book down and staring at Claire. “I mean sure, it’s not all sunshine and daisies, but I’ve accepted that life isn’t fair and the situation overall sucks but there’s nothing that I can do about it. I did my crying, I’ve accepted it and now I’m just going to wait until it’s time to leave for Boston and enjoy my favorite things while I do.” She picked her book back up and turned the page. “Now get your nose out of my closet and go to that party.”

“Ri, I love you a lot. You’re my sister and my best friend, we’ve spent our entire lives together. We grew up together and we know each other better than anyone else in this world. So I don’t know why you think you can pull this ‘I’m fine’ bullshit over on me. Because if anyone knows you’re not fine, it’s me.” She grabbed an off the shoulder shirt and tossed it at Riley’s feet, a pair of jeans following after and then she closed the closet and walked over to her dresser, grabbing a strapless bra and adding that onto the pile. “So get up, get dressed and meet Brendan and I out in the living room in ten minutes or so help me God, I will drag you out of bed and to the party looking exactly like this, by your hair.”

Riley sat there as she watched Claire open the bedroom door and walk through it, shutting it behind her once more. On one hand, she knew Claire was right. Her time here at home was dwindling down fast and before she knew it, she’d be in her new apartment in Boston, alone. But on the other hand, she just wanted to spend her time, especially at night, doing the things she enjoyed. Things that filled her time and preoccupied her mind from drifting off onto wondering what Matthew was doing or how their vacation to Greece went. If he was back home now or if he went off on another trip with friends.

She bookmarked her page and set the book off to the side before tossing her blankets off and getting out of bed. Grabbing the clothes Claire had set out, Riley changed over to the jeans and shirt, getting dressed into real clothes that weren’t sweatpants and a t-shirt for the first time all day. She took the time to get herself ready and looking like she hadn’t just spent so many hours locked away in her room, lying in bed and reading a book before she left her room, seeing Claire and Brendan sitting there, both looking surprised.

“Well damn, you actually did it,” he said, looking at Claire and uncrossing his arms. “Well, let’s get going, yeah?”

He walked towards the front door, Riley standing there as Claire came up beside her and draping her arm over her shoulders with a smile. “You’ll have fun tonight, Ri, I promise.”

Maybe Riley’s idea of fun and Claire’s idea of fun were close, but not the same. Sure, it was nice to see some of her friends from high school and some of Claire and Brednan’s friends too at the house of one of Riley’s friends. Their city was large, but small. Everyone here had a sixth degree relationship with someone else.

And that's something Riley should’ve remembered when she saw Matthew standing inside talking to one of her and Claire’s friends from high school. At first, she had to convince herself that it wasn’t actually him, she was just imagining it. But when he leaned his head back and laughed, she felt something squeeze around her heart, because she’d know that dimpled smile anywhere. She stopped herself from going inside to grab herself a soda, instead walking around the backyard to try and find Claire or Brendan to tell them that Matthew was here and she wanted to go home.

Yet somehow, they were nowhere to be found and she was left to figure it out herself. She texted their sibling group chat, sending an ‘SOS, need to talk’ message before sitting herself down on the edge of the pool and rolling her pant legs up as high as she could before dipping her feet into the cool water. It was only a little over a week away before their one month of not seeing each other or talking was to come to an end. Then they could try to be friends again, but the feeling inside of her chest and her racing heart was telling her that a month wasn’t enough.

That maybe they would need more time, or God forbid, not be able to be friends at all.

“Hey…” She felt her pulse in her throat as she looked up to see Matthew standing there to her left, his hands buried deep into his shorts pockets.

“Hey,” she replied, smiling softly as she motioned for him to take a seat. “You can sit…if you want.”

She watched as he hesitated for a moment before nodding and taking his hands out of his pockets and sitting himself down next to her, taking his flip flops off and placing them down next to her before putting his feet into the pool. They sat there in silence for a few moments, the party in the background filling the silence between them.

“How was the trip to Greece?” She asked, breaking the silence and swallowing the knot in her throat. “I saw the pictures…but how was it?”

“Good, it was good, a lot of fun,” he nodded, holding his bud light in his hand. “It would’ve been a lot more fun with you there, but you know…it was still a good time. How have you been?”

“Good,” she nodded, looking at him and shrugging. “Just a lot of shifting through stuff. My mom’s trying to get rid of half of my things, I think she’s planning on turning my bedroom into a craft room or something.”

“Mom’s tried that with Brady’s room a couple of times,” he laughed softly. “Said we’ve shared a room before, we can share one again.”

“You might not have to worry about that longer though, I saw he and Emma got engaged. I wanted to text him and congratulate him, but…you know.”

“Yeah, it’s about time too. I swear they’re practically married though,” he laughed, taking a sip of his beer. “I’ll tell them you said congratulations though.”

“Thanks,” she nodded, playing with her hands in her lap and kicking her feet in the water.

Matthew finished his drink and cleared his throat, looking at the can and then at her. “Would you want to come with me to get a refill? So we can keep catching up and I won't lose you in the crowd?”

Something inside of her told her maybe it wasn’t the best idea, but it was greatly overshadowed by the feeling of missing him for the last twenty days. “Yeah, okay,” she smiled and nodded her head.

Matthew stood himself up and reached his hand out to help her stand up too. He held her hand for a few seconds longer even after she was standing up, but then he let go and the two of them made their way into the house. Over the music they talked about what they’d been up to since they last saw each other. Matthew had gone into more detail about the Greece vacation, the sights they saw, the food and drink, renting a boat for a day and how clear the water had been. He told her that she would’ve loved it and she agreed, she would have. She told him that she wished she would’ve gone.

One of their mutual friends, which turned out to be one of her friends from high school’s brother, who was a friend of Matt’s, tried to get them to join in on some drinking game which had everyone already playing, giggling and laughing as they watched two people trying to down their drinks faster than the other. But Matthew just grabbed her hand and led her away from the group so they’d stop trying to lure them in. When they finally stopped walking, they found themselves in one of the few quiet rooms in the house– a room that looked like it was a guest room.

Riley would be lying if she said that her heart wasn’t racing and her body temperature wasn’t rising at the mere fact that she was alone in a bedroom with Matthew for the first time in months. But like he always did, he was able to bring her at ease but just…talking. They talked about her move to Boston, how she found an apartment and was set to move in in late August, early September. How she had started to talk to the two other co-workers she was hired on the same job announcement with and that they seemed like really nice people. He told her again, just how happy he was and proud he was of her for getting the job and that he knew she’d do great things.

It felt like no time between them had passed at all and they were both sitting on the bed, laughing and talking like they hadn’t broken up and were doing a horrible job at trying to be friends– when the tension that they had was still so heavy and clear, that it was hard not to notice. So maybe that’s why after the laughter had simmered down, she leaned in and kissed him before quickly pulling back, ready to apologize.

And maybe that’s why, instead of letting her apologize and agreeing that it wasn’t the best idea, Matthew cupped her face and leaned back in, kissing her back.

They both knew that what they were doing wasn’t the best idea. This would set them back again on their journey to being friends. With each layer of clothing that was removed, it was another chip away at the shield she had put up to protect her heart and herself after their break up. She would once again have that aching, open wound she’d need to nurse back to health once it was all said and done.

For right now though, she didn’t care. Because all she’s wanted since that night in his apartment, was to have one more night or day or hour or minute to be in his arms. To kiss him again. And now that she was here, in this moment and getting what her heart had been wishing for the last three weeks…she never wanted it to end.

But it had to, and when they laid there together after it was all over– just like before, it felt like nothing had changed. He had his arm draped over her and she was curled into his side and laying her head on his chest. ‘This is how it’s supposed to be, right here…just us.’ She thought and kept repeating that thought in her head, even as there was that aching feeling in her chest that knew it wasn’t going to last.

Riley wasn’t sure of how long they laid there for, not long enough for the party to be over because they could still here the muffled sounds of music and the guests from the other side of the locked door. But long enough to where she knew that if they didn’t leave the room now, their lack of presence would be noted by those who knew of their relationship. So she was the first one who made the move to get up out of bed and start to get dressed, Matthew following soon after her as they didn’t speak. And suddenly she found herself regretting her choice to get dressed, because laying there in silence was so much better than getting dressed in silence.

“Oh…” he said, picking up her shirt which had soaked up the remainder of his beer that had been spilled at some point while they were undressing. “You can’t wear this, it reeks of beer. Here,” he took off his shirt, an old London Knights one she’d worn time and time before as a pajama shirt. “You can wear mine.”

“Thanks,” she said, putting on his shirt and then taking her beer soaked shirt from him balling it up and shoving it in her purse.

“Riles…” God she missed hearing him call her that, it was her favorite thing in the world she’d come to find. But right now, she wished he was calling her anything else. “I…maybe we just got a little too ahead of ourselves with this…trying to be friends, you know?”

She could feel the tears burn in her eyes as she choked them back, trying not to let the knot in her throat stop her from taking deep controlled breaths. “Mhhm.”

“It’s just…it’s too soon and then this,” he shook his head, exhaling. “I don’t regret this at all, Riles. Because I love you, I do. But I don’t, I’m not sure if I can be your friend and love you at the same time.”

Riley just nodded again, making the first move towards the door as he followed behind. “I get it, I do.”

“So maybe,” he took another deep breath and exhaled, putting his hands in his pockets again. “Maybe, it’s going to take a lot longer…and maybe we shouldn’t–”

“Matthew, please,” she said, shaking her head. “You don’t need to say it, I understand what you’re saying, I promise. Thank you for everything, and I don’t regret this either and I love you.” She felt the knot in her throat choke her for a second before she cleared it and nodded, turning away from him. “I think I’m just going to go home.”

He nodded, and reached around her, unlocking the door and opening it before stepping aside and letting her leave the room. She heard the door close behind her soon after, probably to let himself wait a bit before he left the room as to avoid any speculation, though that was going to be hard considering he was left shirtless and she was wearing his shirt. She made her way outside after not seeing Claire or Brendan anywhere in the living room and kitchen, eventually catching sight of Brendan standing off by the jacuzzi. She walked over as fast as her feet would take her, clutching her purse and her shirt against her and fighting like hell to keep the tears from falling.

“Hey Ri,” Brendan smiled, his smile falling once she got closer. “What’s wrong?”

“I want to go home,” she spoke softly, Brendan ushering her off to the side and away from friends so they could speak privately. “Matthew’s here a-and I just want to go home.”

“Of course he’s here,” he said, looking confused. “Didn’t Claire tell you he was going to be here?”

She looked at him, confused and taken aback when she felt a pair of arms around her shoulders and someone resting their chin on her shoulder. “Hi little sister, are you having fun?” Claire smiled, letting her arms fall to the side when Riley stepped out of them. “What’s wrong?”

“You knew he was going to be here?” Riley asked, her bottom lip trembling.

Claire’s smile falling into a frown told Riley everything that she needed to know. “Wow,” she huffed, shaking her head. “Out of everyone, I thought that you would understand how it would make me feel to see him again. I told– I cried to you about everything and you…” she stopped, sniffling and shaking her head again. “I’m going home.”

“I’ll drop you off and come back,” Brendan said, wrapping his arm around her shoulder before looking at Claire and walking with Riley as they left the poolside area of the backyard and through a backyard fence.

When they made it to the front of the house, Brendan dug into his pockets to grab the keys and as they made their way to the car, Riley spotted Matthew getting into the backseat of what she presumed to be an uber. And soon she realized, as she watched the uber slowly drive away…that this was how life was going to be from now on. No more Matthew. And just like the uber had drifted off into the distance and out of view, he too would eventually fade from her thoughts.

And the peace he brought would go along with him.

DAY 244 – SEPTEMBER 1ST, 2022 [ A PEACEFUL REALIZATION ] *EPILOGUE*

“Well Riley, I have to say that your apartment looks quite nice,” her dad smiled, taking a look around the living room and the furniture they’d set up to make the 800 square foot apartment feel a little more homey.

“Thanks, Dad,” she laughed, sitting on one of the bar stools at her counter. “But I meant it when I said you guys can’t stay here tonight. You’ve stayed here the last two nights helping me set up, but now it’s time for me to spend my first night alone in my apartment.”

“They grow up so fast, don’t they?” Brendan teased, resting his hands on her shoulders. 

In the 41 days since that night when she’d last seen Matthew…a lot had changed. For the first two weeks, she and Claire were at odds. It didn’t help that Claire had also gone off to Sweden to visit Jacob’s family for a week, but when she came back, she had apologized to Riley for what she had done. Telling her that her reasoning was that she knew how much she’d missed Matthew and she knew that Matthew had missed her too– and that maybe, if they’d gotten back together that they would be able to see a new solution through.

All she wanted was for her sister to feel better again, she wanted the best for her little sister and though she went about it the wrong way, she was still sorry for doing it and hiding Matthew’s attendance at the party from her. She spent the rest of August spending at much time with her family in between packing and sending emails to work to set up and confirm her first day and what she’d need to bring.

She was nervous to be moving from home, but at the same time she was excited. This was something she had worked for her entire life and she was finally on the journey to reaching it. It was something new and unknown, but that adventure made it nerve wracking…and thanks to Matthew, she’d learned that sometimes, those nerves when you’re about to do something for the first time…were just excitement hiding in the wings.

Her family and Jacob had tagged along to help her drive to Boston at the end of August and have spent the last three days with her, helping her unpack and set up her apartment. Tomorrow afternoon, they’d be flying back home and she’d be in the city of Boston all alone. But tonight, tonight was going to be her first night in her apartment alone– and she was both looking forward to it and hating it at the same time.

“Okay, so we’ll go get in the car so we can go to dinner,” Claire said, as their parents and Brendnan made their way to the front door. “Do you mind waiting for Jacob when he comes out of the bathroom?”

“Not at all, we’ll be right down there,” Riley smiled, waving them off as she spun herself on her barstool.

Shortly after, Jacob came walking out of the bathroom, looking around confused. “Did they leave us?”

“They’re just in the car,” Riley said, hopping off the stool. “But since I’ve got you here, I thought I’d ask…how the convo with our parents go?”

He smiled, nodding his head as they left her apartment. “Really good, they loved the ring. Said that Claire would love it too.”

“I told you she would,” Riley smiled, bumping into him as she looked her apartment behind them. “You sure you’re ready to be a part of the family? I mean…have you met us?”

“I have and you guys are great,” he laughed, bumping her back.

A little bit after their trip to Sweden, Jacob had facetimed Riley asking if he could get her opinion on something. And when she answered, he showed that he was at a jewelry store in Sweden, where he was staying with family a little longer and said that he was wanting to pick out an engagement ring for Claire, but wanted a little insight onto which she might like. She helped him pick it out and when he came into St. Louis the night before they drove up to Boston, he sat their parents down and asked for their permission to marry Claire.

Things had been so hectic that Riley hadn’t been able to get Jacob alone long enough to ask him how it had all gone, but now that they had a little bit of time, she took full advantage of it.

“Is the plan still the same?”

“Mhhm,” Jacob nodded, a fond smile on his face. “I’m going to take her to Lake Louise when we get back to Calgary, just where we went on our first date and then I’m going to ask her. Hopefully she says yes.”

“She’ll definitely say yes,” Riley smiled, nodding her head. “She really loves you.”

“Thanks, Riley, that means a lot,” he replied, the elevator doors opening into the lobby and them walking out. “And I know you guys had a bit of a falling out, but she loves you a lot and never meant to hurt your feelings. You know her, she just…wants everyone to be happy and puts it on herself to make sure they are.”

Riley nodded, sucking in her lips at the mention of their falling out. She felt nervous, but she knew that the nagging feeling wouldn’t go away until she asked, because she knew that the two of them were still in touch. “So…do you know how he’s doing? I haven’t really kept up with the hockey stuff because…you know.”

“He’s good,” Jacob replied, hesitating himself as he took a deep breath and Riley knew he was unsure if he wanted to answer. “He’s excited about going to Florida–”

“FLORIDA?” She asked, eyes wide. “What? Since when?”

“Um…maybe end of July? Right around the time you and Claire had your falling out. He got traded to the Panthers.”

Riley remembered him mentioning about how he and his agent were in talks with the Flames about his contract, but he seemed so hesitant to talk about it and not in the mood too, like something was bothering him and she knew she didn’t want to push further about it so she didn’t. She had no idea that days later he’d be traded.

“Wow, that’s…big,” she said, crossing her arms. “Is he Captain?”

“No, but I don’t doubt he’ll work his way up to it…you know Chucky. He’s really excited to be down there since he’s got an old teammate who plays for them. I think it’ll be a good change for him.”

Riley nodded, not continuing the conversation as they walked out of the apartment building and found her parents rental car, getting inside.

She tried not to let the news be forefront in her brain for the rest of dinner. This was her last night with her family and she wanted to soak up every second of it, especially since she knew that in just short of a week, Claire and Jacob would be back in Calgary and engaged. She knew she was going to miss having them just right there in the same room and knew she’d have to adjust to them being a phone call away instead. She was successful in turning her focus towards them, and by the end of dinner when they dropped her off at her apartment building, her stomach was hurting from laughing so hard.

It was the first time she’d laughed that hard since her break up with Matthew.

There was no fighting from keeping him out of her mind as she made her way into the elevator and the heavy metal slowly climbed the stories to her apartment floor– floor number ten, go figure. But she held it off until she was in the safety of her own apartment, letting the emotions flow out of her as she leaned against the door and sighed.

The silence was loud as she moved through her new apartment, trying to adjust to the layout. She walked over to her keurig, filling it up and placing a mug onto it to make herself something hot to drink. While she waited, she walked back to her room and got undressed, switching over into some pajama pants and an all too-familiar shirt that she’d tried to give back before she left, but allowed herself to keep it since it had been in her possession for weeks, and she knew for a fact that if she even tried to return it, she’d be told to keep it.

It had slowly turned into her favorite shirt the way that the cotton had been washed and dried so many times that the green and white in the Knights logo had started to crack and the material was soft against her skin.

She put on her slippers and walked back out of her room, over to the kitchen where she could see the steam rising from her Banff souvenir mug. Picking it up, she walked back out of the kitchen and over to her balcony door, sliding it open before walking out into the cool night air and shutting the door just barely behind her. She sat down in her chair, taking in the sight of the city lights all around her and the sounds of the traffic and people walking below brought her ease.

Riley brought out her phone, unlocking it and opening her instagram app. Typing in his username, she brought up Matthew’s profile and allowed herself to scroll through his pictures. The last time she’d seen it, it was before their meet up at the party when he’d posted pictures of the Greece trip. Matthew wasn’t one for posting on social media too much, so in that time, he’d only posted four things. One was a tribute video to his time in Calgary, another was a picture of him sitting at a press conference with the Florida Panthers logo behind him, wearing a polo and his dimpled smile. Another was a photo montage of what looked like a boys golfing trip, which Riley laughed at because of course. And his most recent, just a few weeks prior, was an action shot of him in the white and red panthers uniform. It was a far stretch from his red with Calgary…but it fit him well.

Out of habit, she found herself looking up at the sky, seeing the stars that the city lights hadn’t managed to outshine and when she blinked…for a split second…she thought she saw a shooting star.

As the thought passed, she smiled to herself and took a sip of her hot chocolate, looking at the mug once she was finished and leaned further back into her chair. Shortly after their run in at the party, she unfollowed him on instagram as a way to try and cleanse him from her life. A way to make the transition easier for her. But what Riley had discovered was that this was how life was going to be from now on. Sure, there was no more Matthew in her day to day life, no more random texts or facetime calls or phone calls, not even an instagram comment or a snapchat. But there was no cleansing him out of her life.

He left a big mark on her and in her life. He was the first boy she had ever loved and who loved her back, who taught her what it felt like to be loved. He was special, important. She could never push him out of her life. So while he was here for just a short while and gone in a flash, just like a shooting star…he was always going to be there in her memories.

And one day, she’d have to come to terms with that, but for now…it was just nice to think back and smile on the memories anytime a little piece of him popped up in her daily life.

He was everywhere and that was okay, because he had loved her and she loved him too and one could never easily forget it.

[ilyasorokinn]

new beginnings , matthew tkachuk

note, this is so sad. i don't even know what to say. i don't know if there is anything to say. hope you enjoy. pair, matthew tkachuk x reader summary, matthew tkachuk gets traded to the florida panthers. warnings, children word count, 1183 words

(gif not mine)

"Where's Florida?" Olivia asked.

You had just told Olivia and Jamie you were moving from Calgary to Florida. Max was still too young to understand what was happening, so he was in his crib taking a nap.

You pulled out your phone and showed both of them on a map where you'd be moving, "That's so far." Olivia looked like she was gonna cry. Matt frowned, pulling her into his lap.

"I know, but think, we'll get to go to Disney World all the time." Of course, you and Matt were sad to leave the place you had called home since you were 18, but you knew it was time to go.

That seemed to brighten her mood a little, "But what about Charlie?" Although there was a pretty big age gap between Charlie Coleman and Olivia, they were still best friends.

"I'm sorry, Livey." Matt offered her a sad smile. She pushed herself off his lap and ran into her room, closing the door carefully. You looked over at Matt, a worried look on your face.

He looked just as nervous, "What about you, Jam? What do you think?"

"Disney?" He asked.

"Yeah, we'll get to go to Disney World a lot." Matt nodded.

"Yay!" He clapped his hands. Clearly, he was more excited than his sister.

"All right, I guess we have our answer." You smiled optimistically.

-

Olivia had been in her room for almost 3 hours, which was a record. You let her be alone because it was a lot of change to wrap your head around at 5 years old.

"All right, I'm gonna check on her," Matt announced, standing up from the kitchen table.

"You sure?" You asked.

"Yeah, I can do it." He nodded, making his way up to her room. He knocked on her door before pushing the door open, "Livey?"

"I don't want to go." She sniffled, letting him know that she had started crying.

His heart broke as he laid down in her small bed next to her. He picked her up and held her in his arms, "I know you don't. I don't want to either, but aren't you excited to go somewhere new? You're gonna make so many new friends."

"But Charlie." She pouted.

"How about this? Every time I have to come back here for work, you can come, too and you can see her."

"And can we come back during breaks?"

"We'll see." Matt smiled.

She was warming up to the idea, "Okay."

"Deal?"

"Deal." She nodded.

"I love you." He squeezed her a little tighter and kissed the top of her head.

"Love you, too, daddy."

-

The day after the trade was announced, you, Matt, and all three kids flew down to Florida. He took pictures with staff, held a press conference, and lastly, the team gifted all three children with new merch for your kids.

You tried to ignore the cameramen in the room and focused all your attention on Jamie and Olivia in front of you, "Look at how cool it is." You showed them the new jersey.

"Cool." Jamie nodded, his eyes wide as he took in every detail of the jersey. He raised his arms and you slipped the jersey on him.

Olivia observed it a little while longer, but raised her arms and let Matt slip the jersey on her. You held Max in your arms, a little Panthers jersey of his own, as you posed for the cameras all around you.

When you got back to your home you were renting till you officially moved in, Keith and Chantel were there. You had a surprise in store for the kids, so they were going to watch them while you got their surprise.

"All right, we'll be back soon. Be good for grandma and grandpa." You kissed Olivia's head as you headed towards the car.

"Bye-bye." Jamie and Olivia waved.

"Bye." You both waved.

-

A few hours later, you were pulling back into the driveway, your special surprise asleep in the backseat. You carefully picked up the surprise from the backseat while Matt gathered everything else you had picked up.

You unlocked the door, "We're home." You sang.

Jamie and Olivia ran to greet you and gasped when they saw the surprise in your arms, "A puppy?"

"Surprise." You smiled, bending down and letting them pet him and introduce themselves. The dog's tail hadn't stopped wagging since the moment they started petting him.

"Is he ours?"

"He's all ours." You nodded.

"What's his name?"

"What do you want to name him?"

Jamie and Olivia looked at each other, and whispered back and forward before turning back to you, "Woody." Jamie stated.

"Woody?" They both nodded.

"All right, well welcome to the family, Woody."

-

True to his word, when Matt played the Flames, he came back to Calgary with you and Olivia. Your parents flew into Florida to watch Jamie and Max.

You had a couple new jackets gifted to you from the Panther's partners, but decided to switch it up and wear an old Flames jacket in support.

When you walked out of the bathroom wearing the jacket, Matt let out a laugh, "What? Is there something wrong with my jacket, Matthew?"

"Nope, not at all." He shook his head, a smile on his face as he pulled you into a brief hug and pressed a kiss to your head.

Before meeting up with the Coleman clan, you waited in front of the glass for Matt. The Flames were first to come out, and the first person who spotted you by the glass was Elias Lindholm, and he skated up to you with the brightest smile on his face.

A few more players came up to greet you. The only people who knew of you coming to the game were the Coleman's, so seeing everyone else was a surprise.

Matt eventually came out and spotted you easily. He skated over and tossed a puck over. It was part of your tradition. Every game the kids came to, he made sure to get each of them pucks.

This game was no different.

After your glass traditions, you found your seats, and Charlie and Olivia reunited, giving each other big hugs. You hugged Jordan, "Oh, it's so good to see you. FaceTime does no justice."

"Oh, I've missed you too. So glad we were able to come. You'll have to come down to Florida sometime."

"Off-season, you'll be seeing us a lot." She laughed, "And we'll have to do a group Disney trip."

"For sure." You nodded.

"And nice jacket." She ran her finger over the jacket.

"Thank you, thank you. Had to represent." You laughed.

After the game, you met up with Matt by the guest locker room, before making the all-too-familiar trekk towards the home locker room.

"Just the people we were waiting for. The Tkachuk's." You were pulled into a million different hugs as each player and partner pulled you all into hugs.

"Gotta say, haven't missed ay of you." Matt joked, a smile on his face.

"Feelings mutual, chuck." You all laughed.

-

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[izzylovesyou2022]

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[haddonfieldwhore]

i miss you, i’m sorry - matthew tkachuk

matthew tkachuk x fem!reader

summary: you go with your bf to a hockey game; he is unaware of your history with one of the players (please read warnings!)

warnings: abusive bf, violence, strong and derogatory language, angst, a few uses of y/n

word count: 3k

you felt like you hadn’t been able to breathe properly in hours, sitting rigid like a stone next to mike, who’s mood has only deteriorated as the night went on. mike was a diehard coyotes fan, and had brought you to the game with him last minute when his friend had cancelled last minute.

“are you sure none of your other friends would want to go? they would probably have more fun than i would,” you had offered, desperately trying to get out of going.

“they’re all busy,” he replied. “i know you hate hockey, but can you try to have a good time, for me?” he asked sweetly, pulling you into his arms. you weren’t fooled by his tone; you would go and you would enjoy it, you didn’t have a choice.

“okay,” you smiled, and he kissed you softly before going to your shared room to get ready. you sighed, trying to figure out how you were going to make it through this game. you didn’t hate hockey - you used to love it actually, but when you started dating mike you chose to keep that part of your life a secret. it seemed silly at face value, but there was a bigger secret you were hiding from him, and you asked the universe why it had to be the panthers that arizona was playing tonight.

a little less than two years ago, you had dated their star player, matthew tkachuk for almost a year, before the travel and hectic schedule got to be too much for you, and you decided to leave; the hardest thing you had ever done. the relationship had been kept pretty quiet thankfully, no traces of it online except for one or two group photos from when you were together still floating around instagram; though you had done all you could to erase any evidence.

if mike found out, you honestly weren’t sure how he would react; but you knew it wouldn’t be good. you had met mike a few months after you and matthew broke up, and he was nice enough, until he wasn’t. he kept up the good guy just long enough for you to move in and become dependant on him, and suddenly you found yourself trapped. things were okay most of the time, but if he got angry, sometimes you got caught in the crossfire. he had only actually hit you once, but he yelled, and would sometimes grab you too hard, leaving you with bruises to cover before he could see them; he had the audacity to say that they made him upset.

he had been in a good mood when you got to the arena, and you were thankful that your seats weren’t too close to the ice, though you shuddered at the possibility of matthew seeing you in the crowd, despite how slim the chance was. you hadn’t seen him since they day you broke up, and as the familiar head of curly hair came out from the tunnel, skating on to the ice as part of the starting line up, your heart felt like it was being twisted in a vice.

you missed him. you missed your friends on the team, having grown pretty close to some of the guys, as well as their girlfriends. you hadn’t heard from any of them since leaving; it was too hard at first, and then it became a safety concern. any connection to your former life meant more risk of mike finding out about matthew, and that couldn’t happen.

“can you at least look like you want to be here?” mike whispered in your ear, and you knew it wasn’t a suggestion. you put on a smile, and thankfully it was good enough, as he turned his attention back to the players on the ice.

the game started off a bit slow, however the panthers had a 1-0 lead at the end of the first, and through the second as well. the coyotes were playing pretty rough, getting quite a few penalties for some dirty hits, all while mike cheered them on, booing the refs anytime they called a penalty on arizona. you watched as one of floridas players, nick cousins, ran into one of the coyotes while he was low on the boards, the hit landing on his shoulders or maybe his head, you couldn’t really tell. another coyote skated up and checked nick face first into the boards; hard. he hadn’t been looking that way and had no warning to protect himself, and you watched in distress as he crumbled to the ice, and you were worried he was unconscious.

nick had been one of your closest friends while you were dating matt, and your heart pounded as you watched him struggle to his feet.

“that pussy folded like a piece of paper!” mike laughed, enjoying every second of him getting hit. floridas players jumped on the guy who had laid the hit on nick, defending their fallen teammate as a fight broke out, sending players from each team into the penalty box. mikes mood dropped with each second of the refs deliberating passed, the officials eventually awarding nearly 20 penalty minutes to forsling for florida, as well as enough penalty minutes to arizona to give the panthers a man advantage.

“that’s fucking bullshit!” he screamed, the crowd of arizona fans not happy about the decision either. you said nothing as mike spilled some of his fourth beer on your lap, just thankful it hadn’t got on his spare coyotes jersey that he had insisted you wear. as the players got ready to continue the game, you looked across the ice, locking eyes with the one person you hoped you could avoid more than anything. something flashed in his eyes as he saw you, but his attention was quickly back to the game as the whistle blew, and soon the second period was over and he was gone down the tunnel for intermission.

the coyotes scored in the third to tie the game, but the panthers got the lead back, scoring twice in close succession. matthew looked to you after putting the puck in the net, and it took everything in you to ignore him. mike was livid at this point, the alcohol not helping in the slightest, and you cringed internally as he grabbed your hand, holding it way too tight.

forsling finally came out of the penalty box after serving 17 minutes, and immediately scored an empty netter, solidifying a 4-1 victory for florida. with 2 minutes left in the game, mike dragged you out to the concession area. matthews eyes noticed your empty seats, and his heart dropped, wondering if he had imagined you even being there in the first place.

downstairs, mike pushed you against the brick wall next to the restroom.

“wait here. i gotta piss before we leave,” looking at the long lineup already formed outside the men’s room. the arena was small, and there were limited washrooms, so you had a feeling this was gonna take a while, but you dared not move from your spot against the wall.

you could hear the final buzzer go, and the florida players began walking out from ice level, and you realized that they had to walk through the main area to get to the visitors locker room, and your blood ran cold. most of the panthers paid no mind to you, but you held your breath as you saw matthew approaching, praying that he ignored you like the others had.

he thankfully didn’t say anything, but your eyes locked for the second time that night as he passed by, disappearing down the hall and into the locker room. your foot tapped anxiously on the floor, grinding a small piece of gravel under your shoe as you willed mike to hurry the fuck up.

10 minutes went by, and you exhaled in relief as he finally appeared, not even caring about the death grip he took on your wrist as he literally dragged you behind him towards the exit.

“y/n?” a familiar voice called, and you hoped with all you had that mike would ignore it and keep walking. “wait- y/n.” mike stopped, causing you to bump into his back with how fast you were following behind him. he turned around, and you were sure he was quite confused as to why matthew tkachuk was calling after you.

“what the hell do you want?” mike asked, looking matt up and down before turning to you, still holding you tight. “do you know this asshole?”

“no, let’s go home,” you pleaded, but he wasn’t budging.

“you got the wrong girl.” mike shrugged. “shouldn’t you be circle jerking with the other guys in the locker room right now?” he spat, still bitter about his team losing the game.

“i told them to start without me,” matthew joked dryly, and you could feel his eyes on you, however yours were glued to the floor.

“funny,” mike replied. “let’s go,” he pushed you in front of him to leave.

“wait, y/n - please.”

“i’m sorry, you have the wrong person.”

“yeah, chucky,” mike laughed. “you must be thinking of some other whore. i’m sure there’s a lot of desperate chicks around here that would suck your cock though, so stop talking to mine.”

“you really shouldn’t talk about women like that,” matthew threatened, and while his tone sounded calm, you knew he was furious.

“or what? what, you want to fight or something?” mike asked. you noticed a few people gathering to watch, either out of concern or just to see matthew, but you knew this wasn’t going to end well.

“baby, can we please just-“

“shut up!” he shoved you and you fell to the floor, landing hard on your ass, before punching matthew in the face. matthew swung a fist at mikes face, hitting him square in the jaw. your eyes widened in horror as mike swung more drunken punches back at matt, and people backed away from the fight. you looked down the hall to see a familiar face, and you called out to your former friend.

“carter!” his eyes snapped up from his phone and he took out an airpod before he noticed the fight, and he quickly pulled matthew off of mike with the help of security guards that had come to help break up the situation. you stared at the ground in front of you again, feeling like the room was spinning and wishing that the floor would open up and swallow you. security handcuffed mike and escorted him out of the building, while carter and another security officer took matthew back down the hall towards the locker room.

an officer asked you to come with him, and he took you to an empty office room to take a statement about what happened. you just hoped matthew wouldn’t get in too much trouble.

•

when you left the office, there were thankfully little to no fans left in the arena, the hallways eerily empty as you walked towards the door. before you could reach it though, something - or someone - made you pause. you looked back down the hall to the locker room, and with a sigh walked towards it. you knocked on the door, your heart hammering against your ribcage as it opened, one of the team staff looking at you.

“i’m sorry, you can’t be back here-“

“it’s fine. she’s a friend,” carter interrupted her, opening the door to let you in. the room was empty, the team having already left, and you forced yourself to look at carter.

“are you okay?” he asked, and you nodded.

“thank you. i’m sorry-“

“don’t, it’s not your fault.” he opened his arms and you fell into them, hugging him tightly. “chuckys just getting patched up in the medic room. mostly procedure that they have to check him after a fight - usually it only happens during a game though,” he joked, and you found yourself smiling for real for the first time that night.

“is he in a lot of trouble?”

“no more than he normally gets himself into. it’ll be fine, y/n,” he assured you, but you were still worried there might be some legal repercussions. deciding there was nothing you could do about that right now, you managed to push the thought away and sat down on a bench in the locker room.

“you waiting around for him?” verhaeghe asked, and you nodded, eyes on the floor again.

“yeah. i think i’d be a shitty person not to.”

“you could never be a shitty person,” he smiled. “we miss you. chucky especially.” you looked up at him sadly.

“i miss you guys too.”

the medic door opened with a creak, and matthew walked out. you kept your eyes on your feet, counting the laces on your shoes over and over again.

“i’ll see you later,” carter said goodbye to both of you before leaving the room. you didn’t dare look up as matthew walked over slowly and sat down next to you, leaving space between you as his gaze lingered on you.

“you waited,” he said softly.

“yeah…. i don’t think i should have, but i wanted to make sure you were okay.”

“you wanted to make sure i was okay?” he laughed softly. “yeah, i’m okay.” he said, and an awkward silence filled the room. “was he always like that?” he asked gently, and you shook your head sadly.

“nope,” you said bitterly, eyes growing wet with tears. “he was perfect at first. until he wasn’t.”

“i’m sorry.”

“don’t be. it’s not your fault.”

“i still am. you don’t deserve to be treated like that.” you didn’t reply, knowing he was right. “y/n, you haven’t even looked at me.” he hand touched yours on the bench next to you, his touch so soft and gentle it was unfamiliar.

you turned your head towards him, and his heart broke at your sad expression. his lip was split open, red and forming a bruise already. you reached for his face without thinking, pulling your hand back before you went too far.

“what do you want me to say?” you whispered, a tear rolling down your cheek. with the carefulness of someone touching glass, he brushed it off your face, and you closed your eyes, leaning into his touch.

“do you have somewhere to stay tonight?” he asked, somewhat ignoring your question. he didn’t want you to say anything, he just wanted to make sure you were safe.

“i can figure something out,” you said, going through the options in your head; likely a hotel or sleeping in your car.

“please, i would feel a lot better if i knew you were somewhere safe. i have an extra bed in my hotel room-“

“no, matthew. i can’t do this.”

“do what?” he asked.

“this,” you gestured between the two of you. “thank you for protecting me, but i can’t let myself be near you. it’s too hard.”

“please,” his blue eyes looking in yours. the smell of his cologne wafted to your nose, filling you with a sense of safety that only he could ever bring you.

“okay,” you nodded.

•

the drive to the hotel was short and silent, but you felt at ease for the first time all night. the more time you spent with him, the more it felt like no time had passed; like things were back to how they were before. matthew held your hand the whole drive, his thumb drawing little circles on the back of it gently, his touch like a feather.

you got up to the hotel room and he grabbed a t-shirt from his suitcase for you.

“you a coyotes fan now?” he teased, and you laughed. matthew hadn’t realized how much he missed the sound, but did he would do anything to hear it again and again.

“not by choice,” you laughed, pulling mikes jersey over your head, putting the t-shirt over your undershirt you had on.

“did he know about -“

“no,” you shook your head, dropping the jersey in the small garbage can, and matthew cracked a smile. “he probably wouldn’t have liked it very much.”

“i’m sorry, i don’t mean to -“

“it’s okay. i know. how’s your lip?” you asked, still feeling guilty about it.

“it’s not my first split lip. i’ll live,” he smiled.

“is nick okay?” you asked, remembering the nasty hit during the game.

“he wasn’t feeling too hot after that. i’m not sure yet,” he admitted, and you nodded, before covering your mouth as a yawn slipped past your lips. “come on, sleepyhead, let get you to bed.”

you nodded, dragging your exhausted body into the nearest of the two queen sized beds. matthew tucked you into bed, leaning down to kiss your forehead, and you reached for his hand before he could walk away.

“lay with me?” you asked sleepily, knowing it was selfish to use him as a safety net right now; but you felt you would fall apart without him.

“are you sure?” he asked, and you nodded. he crawled into bed next to you, letting you cling to him like a life raft. “you’re safe now. i won’t let anyone hurt you, baby, i promise.”

“i know, matty,” you snuggled into him, everything about him bringing you comfort you hadn’t felt since you left; his scent, his voice, the feeling of his arms around you. “i missed you.”

“god, i missed you to. i don’t want to let you go again.”

“please don’t,” you begged, your eyes wet with tears that fell onto the fabric of his shirt, your fingers gripping it so tight your knuckles hurt. “don’t let me go.”

“i won’t.”

you felt like you were dreaming; what had started as a nightmare turning into the first time you had felt safe in months. you were scared that you would wake up and it hadn’t been real - you would be next to mike in his apartment, the cold draft from the window on your side of the bed would prickle you skin like it always did and you would have to apologize for not having his lunch ready for work.

but instead you would wake up in the arms of someone who actually cared about you, the sun peeking through the cracks of the blinds, casting warmth onto your skin. along with it, matthew brought a light to your life that had been missing for so long, you thought it was lost for good.

matthew pressed another soft kiss to your forehead as you felt yourself falling asleep, knowing you were protected as long as he was next to you.

“thank you matty,” you murmured, barely awake as you nose brushed the side of his jaw, your face tucked into the crook of his neck.

“anything for you.”

disclaimer: all screenshots, events, and/or interactions depicted in this are a work of fiction. i have no association with any parties mentioned

[chewingcyanide]

𝐄𝐌𝐌'𝐒 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓

below are the my own personal works. if you’d like to request a certain idea, feel free to in my inbox. furthermore, if you’d like to be added to my taglist, all you have to do is ask, or fill out the form in my navigation. i promise i don’t bite ;)

you are responsible for the content you consume. i am not your parent and won’t police you. most of what i write is fairly tame, but if you aren’t sure—don’t read it. i want you to be comfortable online. be gentle with yourself and know your limits.

feel free to request! what i have right now is a rough outline—players will be added, as will works.

⇨ most recently completed — 𝐒𝐄𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐃 𝐁𝐄𝐒𝐓 ( jh86 )

⇨ upcoming — ???

JH86

જ⁀➴ 𝐖𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐂𝐎𝐋𝐎𝐑 𝐒𝐊𝐈𝐄𝐒 ( completed ) ( 18 + )

pairing — jack hughes x best friend!f!reader

synopsis — a sunset boat ride with your childhood best friend reveals more than you ever thought it would. based loosely on you are in love by taylor swift.

જ⁀➴ 𝐒𝐄𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐃 𝐁𝐄𝐒𝐓 ( completed )

pairing — jack hughes x childhood best friend!reader

synopsis — pining over someone is never fun—even less so when they’re your childhood best friend, and dating someone else.

જ⁀➴ 𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 '𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔 ( wip ) ( 18 + )

pairing — jack hughes x ex!f!reader

synopsis — a wedding, an after party, running into your ex after two years; what could go wrong? oh, yeah—everything. based loosely on about you by the 1975.

જ⁀➴ 𝐃𝐎𝐍'𝐓 𝐁𝐄 𝐀 𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑 ( wip )

pairing — jack hughes x childhood best friend!reader

synopsis — receiving an invitation in the mail bearing your long-time crush’s and another’s name would normally be cause to give up and move on. not for jack hughes. he’s determined to win you over, even if he only has six months to do it. based loosely on scott street by phoebe bridgers.

જ⁀➴ 𝐅𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐃, 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐊𝐄𝐑 ( 18 + ) ( wip )

pairing — jack hughes x zegras!singer!reader

synopsis — a sold out show, glances shared between yourself and your older brother’s best friend leads to an encounter you wouldn’t have expected—and one you can’t forget. based loosely on think later by tate mcrae.

TZ11

જ⁀➴ 𝐂𝐈𝐆𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐒 & 𝐇𝐔𝐑𝐑𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐄𝐒 ( 18 + ) ( wip )

pairing — trevor zegras x ex!f!reader

synopsis — four months after a messy break up with the anahiem ducks’ finest, you find each other again at a party. only difference? he has a girl on his arm, one who isn’t you. based loosely on i don’t wanna talk (i just wanna dance) by glass animals.

જ⁀➴ 𝐈𝐅 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐆𝐎, 𝐈'𝐋𝐋 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐘 ( wip )

pairing — trevor zegras x f!reader ; omc x f!reader ( briefly )

synopsis — you have been best friends with trevor since before you knew what a best friend was. convinced you are in love with him, your current boyfriend makes a scene at the bar, forcing you to consider the possibility that yes, you may have been in love with your best friend. based loosely on say yes to heaven by lana del rey

QH43

જ⁀➴ 𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐋𝐎𝐍𝐄𝐋𝐘 𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 ( wip )

pairing — quinn hughes x ex!f!reader

synopsis — angry and confused following a sudden break up with your long-term boyfriend leads you drunk and miserable at a house party. and who else would play your white knight than your ex-boyfriend, quinn? based loosely on you don’t go to parties by 5sos.

જ⁀➴ 𝐈 𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃'𝐕𝐄 𝐅𝐔𝐂𝐊𝐄𝐃 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐁𝐑𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 ( 18 + ) ( wip )

pairing — quinn hughes x f!reader ; jack hughes x ex!f!reader

synopsis — on-and-off with his brother, quinn has seen every terrible thing jack has done to you. when finally you’ve had enough, the opportunity of a lifetime presents itself; why fuck his best friend, when you can fuck his brother? based loosely on i should’ve fucked your brother by olivia o’brien

જ⁀➴ 𝐋𝐈𝐂𝐊-𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐊 ( 18 + ) ( completed ) ( 400 celly! )

pairing — quinn hughes x f!reader

synopsis — ever since overhearing quinn’s snide remark at you, you’ve been just shy of killing each other whenever in the same room. when halloween comes up and your friend group winds up at a haunted house, you are unfortunately paired with quinn to go through the attraction. together. alone.

MB13

જ⁀➴ '𝐓𝐈𝐋 𝐈𝐓'𝐒 𝐆𝐎𝐍𝐄

pairing — mat barzal x f!reader ; trevor zegras x ex!f!reader

synopsis — after breaking up with the man you thought you’d marry, you finally manage to pick up the pieces of your shattered heart and offer them to another. only, your budding romance isn’t as secret as you once thought. a meeting on the ice of your past and present brings more than just bruised skin and bloody knuckles: it brings a choice. your now, or your before?

MT19

જ⁀➴ 𝐁𝐔𝐑𝐍, 𝐂𝐑𝐀𝐒𝐇, 𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄

pairing — matthew tkachuk x f!reader

synopsis — the swift approach of brady’s wedding leaves matthew with no choice but to ask his neighbor to accompany him as his plus one; a weekend of forced proximity, a one-bed room, and heaps of alcohol—what could go wrong? based loosely on talk fast by 5sos.

JH86

જ⁀➴ 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐏𝐀𝐒𝐓, 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐅𝐔𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐄, 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐘𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐈𝐍 𝐁𝐄𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐄𝐍 ( 18 + ) ( wip )

pairing — jack hughes x f!reader

synopsis — a failed marriage would have been worse, had it not resulted in your only son, blake hughes. summer is coming up, and so arrives the deal you’d made with blake’s father, jack—he gets to take him to michigan for two of the three months out of summer. only problem? blake refuses to go with his father, unless you come too. eager to please your son, and not ruin his summer, you agree. will you manage to hold your ground and resist jack, or fall right back into his arms?

part one

part two

part three

???

જ⁀➴ 𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐊𝐀𝐁𝐋𝐄 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐍 ( 18 + ) ( wip )

pairing — jack hughes x fem!reader ; best friend!luke hughes x fem reader ( platonic )

synopsis — from freshman year until now, you’ve buried your feelings for your best friend’s older brother in the shallow grave of your heart. an annual summer trip to the east coast reveals much more than you desired, and begins the knotted love story of yourself and jack hughes.

— 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐎𝐍𝐄 ᝰ.ᐟ 𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐧 ( completed )

a summer getaway to the coast unravels more secrets than you’re comfortable sharing; namely, the love you’ve harbored for your best friend’s older brother for nearly five years. based loosely on cruel summer by taylor swift.

— 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐓𝐖𝐎 ᝰ.ᐟ 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐦𝐚𝐝, 𝐦𝐚𝐝 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 ( completed ) ( 18 + )

the second part of breakable heaven, we jump forward to the holiday season, drawing you back home to michigan, and right back into the arms of your first and only love. based loosely on i wish you would by taylor swift.

— 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐄𝐄 ᝰ.ᐟ 𝐠𝐨𝐥𝐝𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐨 ( completed ) ( 18 + )

the third installment of breakable heaven, you find yourself trying your hardest to foster a relationship with jack, all while keeping luke none the wiser. what happens when it all comes out at jack’s birthday celebration? based loosely on dress by taylor swift.

— 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑 ᝰ.ᐟ 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 ( completed )

the fourth part of breakable heaven; dealing with the fallout of luke discovering your secret relationship with his older brother, you find yourself pouring over the memories of what was—and trying your hardest to hold onto what is, even as summer rapidly approaches and nothing is certain. based loosely on the very first night by taylor swift.

[avawritesthings]

shameless | mt19

✦ word count - around 1.2k

✦ summary - in which matthew fucks reader in a club bathroom.

✦ warnings - smut, dirty talk, mentions of drinking

✦ ava’s notes - ended up writing this at 2am with minimal editing, hope you guys enjoy!

a/n pt2: thank you so much for over 500 notes on my jack hughes fic!!! didn't expect so much support <3

nhl masterlist

Say it louder, say it louder Who's gonna touch you like me, like me?

The loud, ground-shaking music was all you could hear. Shouts, singing, glasses clinking, sports matches on the TVs, you name it. You shouted over the noise your order to the bartender, and he simply nodded. You braced yourself against the bartop, and scanned the crowd for your boyfriend.

Almost immediately, you spotted Matthew, with a girl seemingly hanging off of his every word. You rolled your eyes before turning back around and the bartender had just set your drink down. With a grateful nod, you grasp the drink in your slightly sweaty hand and take a swig, thankful for the burn. 

Yet again, you locked eyes with Matthew’s frame and gulped down the rest of your drink, setting the empty glass on the bar and moving through the throng of sweaty people dancing.

“Hey!” You had to shout over the booming music, and Matthew thankfully heard you instantly. He sighed in relief, wanting to get rid (nicely, of course…) of the stranger close to him.

“Hey, baby,” He shouted back, walking up to you and slinging an arm over your shoulder.

“Who’s this?” You asked, as innocently as you could. Through your peripheral, you could see the dirty look she gave you.

“Olivia,” She answered, and you rolled your eyes yet again. “Who are you?”

“His girlfriend, now get lost.”

The stra- Olivia hurriedly scurried away, seemingly embarrassed from being caught flirting with another girl’s boyfriend.

“You coulda just left her and came to me at the bar, y’know. No need to entertain a desperate girl,” You comment, trying your best not to sound jealous.

‘Jus’ didn’t wanna be rude,” Matthew muttered. “Wait- Are you jealous?” He remarked incredulously. “There’s nothing to be jealous of, sweetheart.”

You pursed your lips and straighten your back, not willing to admit that you are, in fact, jealous. “No! I mean- why would I? I have the hottest boyfriend ever, and I totally don’t see every girl that stops and stares at you. That would be crazy!” You exclaimed, and you immediately saw the smirk form on his face.

Matthew chuckles, and grasps your waist in his hands carefully. “Ooh, so you admit you want me all for yourself?” He says with a wicked smile, his dark blue eyes full of mischief.

You nod slowly, nervously running your fingers through your hair, wondering if it was even possible to deny what he had said. 

“Let me show you that you’re the only one I want, yeah?”

You wordlessly nod, and he quickly leads you out of the packed bar to the bathroom stalls, checking for an empty one. After finding one, he ushers you and follows you in, shutting the door behind you and locking it shut. 

In a flash, Matthew’s lips meet yours with fervor and his leg slotted between yours, keeping them parted. 

As he deepens the kiss, your arms reach around his neck and run down his back, gripping his shirt and pulling him closer to you. Your hips involuntarily rock against his thigh as your eyes rolled to the back of your head. 

You whimper when he finally releases you from his lips and breaks contact. A trail of small, feathery kisses travel down your neck until they stop right below your earlobe. His soft lips trail and nibble against your ear before brushing lightly across your jawline. “You taste so good…” He whispered huskily into your ear.

He finally breaks contact with you and opens his eyes, grinning devilishly at you as his tongue flicks across his bottom lip. “Want me to fuck you, pretty girl?”

You nod feverishly. Lifting up your dress, Matthew hitches it to your hips and immediately drops to his knees. He lifts your leg and sets it on his shoulder. Without hesitation, he slides your panties to the side and enters a finger. His tongue soon joined his finger, and you couldn’t help the moans and whines that left your mouth. Your skin prickles, and you feel a heat pool in your lower back,feeling goosebumps overcome your sensitive skin.

“Doin s’good for me, sweetheart.”

“Don’t stop,’ You begged, and when he added a second finger, you could feel yourself reach climax. You came with a muffled moan, and Matthew lapped up every drop of your sweet release. 

Matthew rose from his knees with a sinful smirk. His next words had you following commands quickly: “Bend over the sink f’me, ‘kay?”

Once bent over, you looked through the mirror held above the sink and saw him undoing his belt and shoving his jeans down his legs. He massaged your ass, and you preened under his touch. 

Matthew gathered your hair into a makeshift ponytail, and with his other hand, he lined his hard length up with your wet entrance. Upon seeing your disheveled state through the reflective glass, he buried himself to the hilt. You covered your mouth with your hand to muffle the loud moan threatening to escape your mouth. 

He pounded into you roughly as he watched your ass bounce against his hips with every thrust. “So fuckin’ tight,” Matthew groans out. “Like this sweet pussy was made for me.”

“Yes, yes, all yours, Matty,” You whimpered out. Your eyes met his through the mirror and he swore he almost came at the sight of your teary eyes and gaping, pouty mouth.

Matthew’s fingers hastily find your clit, and he heatedly rubs the sensitive nub. Your walls flutter around his cock and he groans out. “Shit, baby,” He groans out. “You’re so perfect. If you keep squeezing my cock like this, I won’t last much longer.”

“Cum in me, Matty. Please.”

With those words, his hips stuttered before emptying himself inside of you with a moan. His hand that was holding your hair was suddenly gone. Moments after, your muscles tighten and your orgasm hits you like a tidal wave. Your cunt milks every last drop of his cum, and you swear you see stars when you shut your eyes.

Matthew slaps your ass and he slowly pulls out of your wet pussy, watching as your body goes through the aftershocks. He can’t help but gather your mixed climaxes and thrust two fingers into your dripping cunt. You gasp out a moan, your hands curled over the ridges of the sink.

“Fuck,” You groan out, and he chuckles out in agreement. 

Matthew grabs your underwear off of the floor and helps you into them. You giggle slightly and he sends a questioning glance to you. “I can’t believe we just had sex in a bar bathroom.” 

He shrugs in response, not stopping the smirk that finds itself on his lips. He grasps his jeans off of the floor, zipping them up before buttoning them. Once your dress is lowered to a more appropriate length and you fix your hair and makeup, he holds out his hand before leading you out of the bathroom. Some wandering and curious eyes land on you and Matthew, but he pays them no mind, opting to send you a wink. You feel your cheeks flush and before you know it, he’s ushering you into an Uber and resting a hand on your thigh.

“Round 2 at home?”

[doc-pickles]

waking up in vegas | matthew tkachuk x hughes!sister (p. 1)

series masterlist

summary: nothing can go wrong when you take a sibling trip to vegas with the tkachuks… right?

warnings: mentions of alcohol consumption, allusions to sex but no smut

a/n: this is a self indulgent fic that I might write a part two for 👀 enjoy!

xoxo

nina

The light shining through the windows is too bright, the hum of the AC is too loud. The blankets are too heavy, even the skin of your arms and legs feels too hot.

Yup. You’re hungover.

With a groan you push your face back into your pillow, trying to regulate your breathing as you fight back the urge to vomit. You don’t remember much from last night besides your brothers feeding you shots and dancing with Taryn. At some point, you’d lost Brady and Jack was heckling Luke for something you can’t recall. Quinn had been complaining about the music being too loud and Matthew… Well, you can’t quite place him in your memories of last night.

Your family had been close with the Tkachuks since you could remember. You’d spent summers, holidays, and everything in between with them. Quinn and Jack had always been attached at the hip with Brady and Matthew while you and your twin brother Luke had gravitated toward Taryn.

When your and Luke’s 21st birthday came around Matthew and Jack jumped at the opportunity to plan a trip to Vegas to celebrate the occasion, excited for the seven of you to run the town together.

Except now you feel like you’re dying. You roll over in bed, expecting to find Luke who you usually crawl into bed with when drunk. But the body next to yours is more muscular than Luke’s and the arm wrapped around you holds you tighter than your twin ever had.

“Moving too much,” the sleep heavy voice next to you sounds. “Come cuddle, you’re warm.”

You stomach drops as you realize you know exactly who’s in bed next to you.

“Oh fuck!”

Sitting up in a haze, you look down at none other than Matthew Tkachuk who’s curled tightly around your body.

Your naked body.

“Oh my god,” you shriek, which instantly wakes Matthew up as you begin to fully freak out. “Holy fucking shit!”

Matthew cracks his eyes open, looking over the situation before pressing his hands into his face, “I am so fucking dead.”

“You? What about me?!” you throw your hands out in exasperation and spy something glittering on your left hand. “Oh my god…”

You turn your hand over to reveal a large diamond ring shining in the morning sun. Without thinking you grab Matthew’s arm, a matching silver band adorning his left hand.

“Did we get married?!”

At your words Matthew sits up, eyes surveying the hotel room. Your own follow his path, taking in the white dress and suit on the floor along with a bouquet of flowers, pizza boxes, and empty champagne bottles.

“Oh my god! Matty what the fuck!”

There’s suddenly a pounding on your hotel door and you can hear voices on the other side.

“I swear I’ll break this door down,” Quinn threatens as he calls your name. “Open up or I’m calling mom!”

Matthews face pales and you quickly scramble to grab a hotel robe before sticking your head into the hallway.

“Hey Quinny,” you grin, ignoring the furious look on your oldest brother's face and trying to tamp down your own nerves. “What’s up?”

“Oh nothing, just a beautiful day where my sister decided to get married instead of doing something responsible like going to bed last night,” Quinn deadpans as he glares at you from the doorway, Jack at his side wearing a smirk. “I just came down here to warn you that Luke is probably going to murder whoever’s in your bed right now.”

“About that…” you groan as you press your forehead to the cold wood of the door. “Hubby, are you decent enough for me to let my brothers in?”

Instead of a response a pillow hits your back and you take that as a sign from Matthew to open the door. When your brothers walk in Quinn groans and Jack begins to laugh hysterically until you glare at him and he shuts up.

“I can’t believe you eloped with Matty,” Quinn runs his hand over his face and heaves a sigh. “Jack, I told you this trip was a bad idea.”

“And where were you when the eloping was happening,” you ask as you sit on the edge of the bed. Matthew’s hand rests gently on your back and for some reason the motion is comforting. “I distinctly remember Jack and Taryn encouraging us to go to the chapel.”

“And you listened?!” Quinn screeches.

“And Luke was making out with the cocktail waitress,” Matthew supplies. As soon as he says it you have a vivid image in your head of Luke and a bottle blonde waitress sucking each others faces off. “Brady went back early to call Emma. So that leaves you Quinn.”

Quinn rolls his eyes, “Oh my god. You’re not pinning this on me. It is not my fault you two decided to get hitched because you’d had five too many margaritas and decided to listen to Taryn and Jack for advice.”

You open your mouth to respond but the door bursts open and Luke is now standing in the middle of the room with an angry expression as he takes in the sight of you and Matthew sitting together on the hotel bed.

“Luke-“

“I leave you unattended for half an hour last night and you wake up married?!”

“I wasn’t the one making out with the cocktail waitress all night,” you retort and Luke crosses his arms.

“You cannot seriously be comparing the two instances,” Luke huffs as he steps forward. “Move so I can punch Matthew.”

At your brothers words Matthew grips your shoulders and attempts to use you as a human shield. “You’ll have to get through my wife first.”

Luke, Jack, and Quinn all started yelling at that point, Matthew ducking behind you as they continued to argue.

“Enough!,” you shouted over your brothers. “This is a non issue, I’ll just get the marriage annulled and we can all pretend like it never happened.”

Jack scoffs, “Yeah tell that to Taryn’s camera roll. Pretty sure she’s planning on making you a wedding album for Christmas.”

Luke begins to protest again but you cut him off, “Non issue! Now get out so I can shower and contemplate my life choices in peace.”

Quinn and Jack make a show of grumbling and complaining on their way out the door while Luke stares you and Matthew down, “I swear to god Tkachuk if you find a way to fuck this up even more, so help me.”

“Goodbye Luke,” you wave at him and finally the room is clear. You heave a breath and turn to Matthew who’s grinning. “What?”

“If we’re still technically married does that mean we can have guilt free sex,” Matthew asks with a smirk, his fingers pushing down the top of your robe to show off the purple hickeys on your neck. “Because it looks like we already consummated the marriage.”

You groan, pushing off Matthew as you head to the bathroom, “In your dreams Tkachuk.”

“Trust me Mrs. Tkachuk I’m gonna have the sweetest dreams about you.”

[sweettomyhoney]

personally i would love to read a fic where y/n catches an assault charge for fighting a reporter who said something outta line about her man lmao

𝕂𝕟𝕠𝕔𝕜𝕠𝕦𝕥- 𝕄𝕒𝕥𝕥𝕙𝕖𝕨.𝕋𝕜

𝙿𝚘𝚟: 𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚏𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚊 𝚛𝚞𝚍𝚎 𝚛𝚎𝚙𝚘𝚛𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚍𝚞𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚟𝚒𝚎𝚠 𝚊𝚏𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚢 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚗𝚎𝚐𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚖𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚜 𝚊𝚋𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝙼𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚠.

𝙰𝙽: 𝙸 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚔 𝙼𝚛. 𝚃𝚔𝚊𝚌𝚑𝚞𝚔 𝚒𝚜 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚖𝚊𝚗 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜.

Prof read is a no/ this is a long one

———————————————————

Matthew knew what type of woman he had on his hands from the day one. You were sweet, kindhearted and loving. You were the girl of his dreams and his family absolutely adored you. After all, you did have a temper that only a Tkachuk could love. You were a perfect match for Matthew.

On the other hand, you were a force to be reckoned with. If someone even dared to test your gangster you would give them exactly what they dished out. You were a very protective person, especially when it came to Matthew, or the people that you loved. You were not afraid to get your hands dirty if need be. And today was not the day for someone to want to get on your bad side.

Moving from Calgary to Florida was a huge transition for you and Matthew. But, the both of you knew as long as you had each other everything would be fine. Sadly, ever since you’ve gotten settled in the state it seems like the chaos had not stopped. From unpack, adjusting schedules, getting settled at work, time difference, dealing with new people, and Matthew traveling, it was overwhelming. Now, your main concern was making it through family media day.

Today was the first family day for Matthew with his new team. Since you are now Matthew‘s wife, that ment your day would be filled with nonstop interviews from different local media outlets.For the most part things went smooth, until your last interview with a reporter from a hockey podcast you were not familiar with.

You made your way to your designated interview room hoping to be joined by your husband. As you took your seat ,you were informed it was a solo interview due to Matthew needing to meet with the NHL Network. Then a older blonde women entered the room.

•“Mrs. Tkachuk! it is so nice to meet you.” She said with a smile.

• “Hello it’s nice to meet you too” You reply happily.

• “You are even more beautiful in person.” She said now shaking your hand.

•“I’m Carla. Media Manager for the Panthers and I wanted to introduce you to your interviewer today.” She continued.

Before you could even get a word in, a much younger brunette entered the room.

•“You’re the new WAG I need to interview right?” The brunette said coldly.

•“Yeah that is me, and my name is (y\n) btw.” You replied confused.

•“Not important we are here about Matthew anyway.” She replied with an eye roll

•“Matthew will not be joining us for this interview.” Carla introjected.

• “Great! Another interview with an air head.” The brunette muttered under her breath.

• “Excuse me?” You replied taken back.

• “ Well! I will leave y’all to it!” Carla said quickly before leaving the room.

• “This is going to be fun!” You said to yourself sarcastically.

You then made your way over to your designated seat. The camera crew made sure that your mic was on,and that the lighting was working for you. Once everything was good the interview started.

•“ 3.2.1… Action! ” The camera man counted down.

• “ Welcome back to the Hockey Babes Podcast! I am Brianna! Today I am joined with the new Mrs. Matthew Tkachuk!” The brown haired reporter said enthusiastically.

• “Oh so you have a name? Brianna is it?” You said with a smile.

• “Yes! That is me.” She replied with a hair flip.

• “But anyway! Let’s get into the questions shall we?” Briana said sharply.

• “ We shall.” You replied trying to play nice.

• “So (y/n) what is it like marrying into the most hated NHL family?” Brianna said with a smile.

•“ Excuse me? Hate is a strong word don’t you think?” You replied taken back.

• “ Well it’s not like you married into a truly classy family like the Nylander’s. The Tkachuk’s do have a reputation for being white trash.” She said with a laugh.

“Is this bitch for real?” You thought to yourself. What type of interviewer asks a question like that. You were trying so hard to keep your patience. Luckily, It was the last interview of the day. All you needed to do was get through this last thing, then you were back with your loving husband. You continued to answer the question as calmly as possible.

• “ I do understand that my husbands family has a reputation for playing rough. But, white trash is the last thing that they are. Also, if you were good at your job you would know what WE Tkachuk’s are pretty close to the Nylander’s . My husband was drafted the same year as Alex. Also, his former team mate Auston Matthews now plays on the same line and team as William. So, I am pretty sure if we weren’t classy we wouldn’t be as close as we are.” You said confidently.

•“ You keep telling yourself that.” She replied laughing it off

• “So how did you and Matthew meet exactly?” Brianna continued with a snarky grin.

• “It was after he was drafted. I work with nonprofit organizations with the goal to make sports accessible to everyone. I have worked with Nike, Adidas, Reebok, and Dicks Sporting Goods. I met Matthew when the Calgary Flames volunteered to work with at risk kids. I have been in love with him ever since.” You replied reminiscing on the very moment you knew Matt was the one. 

•“ How cute! Got to make up for the lack of talent he has somehow. Glad to see you have a working brain as well!” she said light heartedly.

•“ What do you mean by that?” You replied getting angrier by the second.

•“ I mean you are with the less successful brother. Brady is the youngest captain in the NHL. And tell me what exactly Matthew has accomplished?” She remarked doubling down on her rude comments.

“ You know what? I think this interview is over!” You said angrily as you stood to take off your mic.

“Aww…Did I make the Air Head mad?” Brianna said antagonizing you.

Before you could think, you lunged at her your fist connecting with her face. You grabbed her hair and pulled her out of her seat. You were full on twirling on this hoe.

• “YOU WANNA TALK SHIT LIKE A BITCH THEN IMMA DOG WALK YOU LIKE ONE!” you said dragging her across the floor.

• “ RIGHT BITCH! WRONG IDEA! DON’T EVER TRY TO BAD MOUTH MY FAMILY HOE!” You screamed as security and Matthew proceed to try a pull you two apart.

•“ Y/N IT’S OKAY! IT IS OKAY! YOU GOT HER! IT’S OKAY” you heard Matthew yell as he held you back from going at her again.

As Security dealt with Brianna, Matthew walked you to the medical room. You took a seat on the patient table. Matthew tried to calm you down as best as he could. You had a few scratches, so Matthew decided to find some things to clean you up. When you were calm enough, Matthew asked you what exactly happened.

•“ Baby what happened? Are you okay?” Matthew asked you wrapping his arms around you.

•“ NO! I am not okay! I just spent the last 45 minutes listening to my family be bad mouthed by a random podcast bitch.” You said brokenhearted.

• “ WHAT!” Matthew replied now upset at what he was hearing.

• “ YES! That bitch was talking about how the Tkachuk’s are white trash. How you are not successful cause you’re not a captain yet! And a bunch of other shit about my intelligence!” You told Matthew getting upset again.

• “ That is fucked up! I’ll take care of whatever bullshit comes next okay?You don’t have to worry about that. But,I want to make sure you are okay?” Matthew said concerned.

• “Well I just whooped her ass, so I guess I’m good” you said brushing your tears away.

• “ You did get her pretty good babe. Maybe you are a Tkachuk after all. I should take a few fights lessons from you. ” Matthew said cracking a grin.

• “ Matthew shut up!” You replied rolling your eyes.

• “ What? All I’m saying is that my father would definitely be proud of you.” Matthew replied causing you to crack a little smile.

• “ You think?” You asked looking at him with a raised eyebrow.

• “ I know for sure my little hot head.” Matthew continued leaning into kiss your forehead.

• “ Now you lay back and rest I’m going to sort this all out. Then we will be on our way home.” Matthew added giving you another forehead kiss.

• “ You don’t think I’ll have to deal with the police right?” You questioned him before he left the room.

• “ No way! The most that will happen is needing to pay a fine. Also you know I have a Fight Fine Fund. Triple F for short .” Matthew reassured you with a slight laugh.

• “It is the NHL after all.” You said laying your head down on the padded table.

Matthew managed to sort some things out for you. The most you had to pay was a fine of 8,000 bucks. This was a standard financial investment for Matthew. The man had 100k stocked for fines he might rack up during the season. Brianna on the other hand, was prohibited to conduct any future interviews with the Panthers. In the end, never mess with a woman who is in love with a man like Matthew Tkachuk. You will end up with your ass beat.

PS: I HOPE THIS DOSE YOUR REQUEST JUSTICE 😘💪

[skatesnstuff]

three years | m. tkachuk

summary: it’s early july 2022 in sunny florida. ophelia hughes is finishing up work before heading down to michigan to spend the summer with her family and friends. but news of a trade deal with the calgary flames puts her world in a blender.

a.n. the first instalment of the hughessister x chucky!! this is gonna have absolutely no background at first but it’ll make since as you read. please be kind, and like and reblog if you like it <3

the florida sun was something ophelia would never get used to.

it slid inside her office at amerant bank arena, making it shine with sunlight. her skin shone with it like a golden goddess, warming it and reminding her of early morning sunrise walks with her youngest brother, luke. her hand moves to correct another photo as her mind wanders to her plans for the next two months: boat rides, tan lines, tiny bikinis, stolen kisses, watermelon running down the corners of mouths, her mother's home cooking.

a knock at her office door brings her out of her daydream. she turns her head to see who's there.

stan, their director of marketing, stands at the door with a small smile on his face.

"hey, phe. i just wanted to talk to you quick before you left for the next couple of months."

her smile falters a little and he's quick to put a reassuring hand to her shoulder.

"it's nothing bad, ophelia, i promise. it's about a trade. i need you to let the social media girls know we need a goodbye post for huby and weegs. they got traded this morning, it was just announced. would you send some photos to them?"

she nods. "yeah of course. do you need anything from me regarding the new guy?"

he shakes his head. "no, cerie can take care of it while you're away. he won't be here until later this week anyways and i want you to have some time with your family. have fun this summer, ophelia."

she smiles, wishing him the same as he leaves. she realizes she never even thought to ask who the new guy was.

cerie comes barreling through the door just as ophelia thinks she can go back to her actual job. “did you fucking hear? we traded jonny and weegs? for that guy? are we stupid?”

cerie was the other full time photographer for the panthers, and ophelia’s best friend in the whole world. they’d joined the team six months apart, after stan had realized the workload was too much for one person at a time. and cerie had just moved to florida from france and barely ever went home to her estranged family, so she was the perfect choice for when they needed a cover in the summer.

“hold on i’m confused. stan said the trade was good, you say it’s bad. who’d we get?” cerie opens her mouth to probably scream the name, but is cut of by a sharp three knocks on the door.

“come in!”

she’s expecting it to be sam or carter, those two were always on her ass about taking better photos. she didn’t have the heart to tell them it was because they were both extremely nonphotogenic. but it’s not either of those people.

“hi, sorry to interrupt, i was told to come see the senior photographer before she left.”

the voice knocks the air out of ophelia as she registers who it is, eyes widening. he realizes a split second later when he finally gets a good look at her.

“phe?”

she sets her jaw, staying seated and gazing up at the boy who had turned into a man since they last spoke three years ago. three years since that awful night in michigan, the fight, his departure from what she thought was the rest of her life. and now matthew tkachuk was standing in her office in sunny florida, a place she thought was a fresh start away from her parents and her brothers (mostly).

“hi, matthew.”

“you’re the senior photographer? how is it even remotely possible that i didn’t know that?”

she scoffs. “well, you were never really good at paying attention, especially to me. why did you need to see me?”

he looks stunned at her tone. she’s all business, he realizes. “i’m supposed to let you know i’m going back home until august and then i need my headshots done. i’ll be back on the 8th.”

“i won’t be here. cerie will do your headshots, and then i’ll proof them and upload them when i’m back on the 20th. anything else?”

he shakes his head, but he doesn't leave. "i'm going back to the lake house. first time in three years."

she finally looks over from her computer again. "good. your mom misses you."

he nods, a small smile on his face as he walks out the door and shuts it behind him. ophelia turns to her best friend, lets out a snort at the look on her face.

"stop looking at me like that, cerie."

"you know matthew tkachuk? what is wrong with you that you never thought to mention that before?"

ophelia shrugs, going back to the last photo she has to edit before she heads to the airport. "we kind of grew up together. we haven't spoken in over three years, though. had kind of a falling out just after i graduated from university."

cerie sits down beside her. "oh my god, phe. are you okay? and he's coming down to the lake house? how is that gonna go?"

phe clicks out of her computer, running her hands over her face with a groan. "it's gonna go like it always goes. his mom will yell at him for not being around a lot in the last three summers, his dad will make me tell him everything that the panthers are up to these days, and brady and taryn will simultaneously smack their brother and squeeze the living life out of me. matty being there won't be any different from the last time he was there three years ago."

"matty, huh?"

oh boy. "shut up."

"i'm just saying! the way you talk about him makes it seem like you guys were a little more than childhood best friends."

ophelia groans again and flips her off. "fuck off, cerie. i don't like to talk about it. what happened between us was embarassing and i would really rather not repeat it."

cerie's hands go up in surrender. "alright, alright. but you will tell me later, fleur. i know you will. now go to the airport, see your family, have some fun!! tell your brothers and your parents i said bonjour."

the two best friends hug tightly. "oh, i'm gonna miss you, cer. but i'm not telling you if quinn is single."

"ophelia-"

"no! no dating my brothers. they don't need your kind of crazy."

"bitch!" "asshole."

the laughter of both women could be heard from where matthew was still standing outside the office, waiting for ophelia to be done.

"matthew? why are you still out here?"

he shrugs, pushing off the wall he was leaning against. "i wanted to wait and see if you needed a ride to the airport."

her head cocks to the side. he had been less than caring when they were kids. three years had definitely changed something in him. "that would be nice actually. my bags are just in the closet over there."

he smiles and nods, carrying the bags when she grabs them. she could get used to this.

"holy shit, is this your car?"

he sold his truck, apparently, and replaced it with a fucking ferrari. of course he did.

"i was told when you move to florida you buy a fancy car."

"i don't know. i bought a jeep."

his laugh is contagious as they climb into his car, and when ophelia looks at him from his passenger seat she almost forgets everything he said the night they last spoke.

this was going to be an interesting summer.

a.n. this is a very special moment; the first (of hopefully many) fics of the hughessisterxmatthewtkachuk au!!! i am really proud of this one, it's one of the longest i've written thus far and i hope everyone loves it as much as i do. like and reblog as always, and stay safe in our dangerous world, lovlies <3, lily :)

taglist: @hockey-racing-fubol

[swissboyhisch]

Canada vs Europe

Liked by crosby87, penguins and others

ivylemieux: One last training before game time. Hiya boys 🙋🏻‍♀️ tagged: crosby87, jackhughes, colecaufield and anzekopitar

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crosby87: Hi, I'd like to ask you not to post more pictures of me

ivylemieux: No.

crosby87: okay, well I tried 🤷🏻‍♂️

taycrosby: Look how smiley Sid is. We've all missed you so much! Liked by ivylemieux

user: I can't wait to see these games!

colecaufield: bestieeeee 🫶🏻

jackhughes: 🫶🏻

ivylemieux: my favourite bromance

user: We know you have the goods. Please post them.

anzekopitar: good seeing you kiddo

tkachuk19: why didn't you post a picture of me :(

ivylemieux: Matty the Ratty you don't need to have your ego inflated more

tkachuk19: but bub 🥺

mcdavid97: suck it up Tkachuk

Liked by jackhughes, ivylemieux and others

laurenmatts: First time seeing an ice hockey game. Thankfully, I have a coach to help me understand icing 🤭 tagged: ivylemieux

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user: even I don't fully understand what is or isn't icing

ivylemieux: Thanks for coming with me on this little trip around the country ❤️

user: Around the country?!

laurenmatts: Always willing to spend time with you 🫶🏻

friend2: you two are stunning! Liked by laurenmatts and ivylemieux

user: imagine never seeing a hockey game 😭

macematts: why didn't you take me 😡

laurenmatts: girls' weekend obvs

macematts: says the girl currently hanging out with a ton of guys

ivylemieux: there is wives and girlfriends too

Liked by jackhughes, ivylemieux and others

hockeycanada: Our favourite captain is in the house cheering on our boys 🇨🇦 tagged: ivylemieux

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user: this is such a great photo

user: 🫡🫡🫡

taycrosby: couldn't just pose normally?

lemieux66: You expect her to be normal?

crosby87: you'd be crazy for that

user: this family is great

user: 🥰🥵

ivylemieux: gotta support the best 🫡

usahockey: so us?

euroallstarhockey: No it's us 💁🏻‍♀️

hockeycanada: who does she play for? oh that's right us. It's us.

user: She’s so cute!

timhortons: We love her 😍

ivylemieux: stahppppp 🤭

Liked by leondrais, nhl and others

mcdavid97: What a way to kick off the Hockey Exhibition tour. tagged: leondrais

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user: love that he also used a picture of Leon

user: What a game! As someone who has never seen a hockey game before... Wow you're a great player

leondrais: we'll get you in the next city

mcdavid97: just win against the US tomorrow?

anzekopitar: yeah we will, don't mind Leo

user: They're besties your honour

ivylemieux: Canadaaaaaa baby

tkachuk19: United States baby

mcdavid97: CANADAAAA

jackhughes: USAAAAAA

nylander29: EUROPEEEEEEEE

user: Guys.... did you see Matt and Ivy watching the game together? Matt even came to support Connor!

ivylemieux: Hate to tell you but I made him come

edmontonoilers: Our favourites playing against each other?! NOoOoo

Liked by calgaryflames, ivylemieux and others

tkachuk19: The three stooges are back together 😈 tagged: ivylemieux and mcdavid97

view all comments

user: I honestly forgot these three were best friends

user: right? it's so weird that Mcdavid and Tkachuk don't constantly fight

taryntkachuk: Bring her home will you?

tkachuk19: 🫡

bradytkachuk: your wish is our command 🫡

user: One of my favourite things about these three is the fact the boys go with Ivy to the other's games. Even though they're rivals. Just super sweet.

tkachuk07: oh no, watch out Australia 🫣

lemieux66: Wouldn't want to be there

user: Best friend goals

user: The chaos 😂

ivylemieux: missed you two knuckleheads 💕

mcdavid97: are you sure?

tkachuk19: Yeah, you hitting us doesn't say 'I Miss You'

ivylemieux: and the tackles that took you both to the ground? What did they say?

laurenmatts: Those tackles said "You better win'

TAG LIST:

@penny4yourthoughts @mp0625 @hischierhaze @11zegras @lvrzegras @francesfarhadi

[raysofcrosby]

FLORIDA PANTHERS MASTERLIST

📝 MATTHEW TKACHUK

○ baby, it’s cold outside

➤ part one

➤ part two

➤ part three

○ chances

➤ part one

➤ part two

➤ part three

➤ part four

○ whatever life throws at you

➤ series masterlist

➤ sneak peek

➤ series preview

➤ social media edits

➤ fic related tags

📝 MATTHEW TKACHUK

○ for the glory

○ you are in love

[angelwithdemonictendencies]

when my hands were caked with dirt at the foot of the grave, you loved me still; ask atrocity of me and see how i tremble with willingness at the sound of your voice.

mt19 x reader: everyone loves to be taken care of.

(warnings: blasphemous filth, oral sex/fingering (m on f, another exception!), unprotected penetrative sex (m on f), kind of oral fixation (have you seen the state of that mouthguard), hair-pulling (bring back the curls), lots of praise and tension and all that nonsense, lots of talk about alcohol, also a lot of emotions! (be warned about those damn emotions! this one has a similar vibe to my qh43 og snakes one, i think), idk just please be warned, don’t read if you’re not 100% sure.)

(long a/n: my favorites - when i tell you i got carried away (again).  but how could i not, when mt19 could not even play in the final cup game because he broke the bone that protects his heart?  when poetry like that calls, you have to answer.  the playoffs inspired me, mt19 inspired me, enough that i created this fictionalized mt19 character that is basically a bunch of insecurities personified.  and the other character is just more of those in bartender form (i loved my bartending years! but they gave me a lot to think about!).  so, sorry.  this one’s a little sad, sometimes.  but you guys seem to like the sad shit, so i hope you like this.  apologies if i get caught up in the theatrics, at times.  we haven’t done a takeaway in a while, so here’s one - you deserve to be chosen and loved and taken care of because you’re you, not just because you’re around.  on a less serious note, can you tell how infatuated i am with mt19′s tooth gap?  yeah, i know, i made it too obvious, i need to relax.  i got a couple okays on the princess name, so if you don’t like it, you should have said something.  am34 is up next, i’m thinking some classic older brother’s best friend, we’ll see if the muses are kind to me.  please let me know what you think, i think i’ve made it obvious that your interaction means everything.  also you guys literally should have seen me trying to figure out the physics of fucking against a barstool, it was legitimately ridiculous.  gif is not mine.  sending so so so much love to you and your snakes.  go canucks.  see you soon.  be your own first choice.

meeting new people simply came with the job of bartending.  new faces filtered in and out of your bar like wisps of fragrant smoke, most of the time too fleeting to truly remember, never mind get to know.

however, the first day he entered your bar, a peculiar feeling hovered around you: the feeling that you already knew him, deeply and personally.

of course, you recognized him and his small group of teammates from the games that constantly played on the screens above the bar, but this was different. you couldn’t quite place the reason behind the feeling, not yet.

he didn’t approach the counter right away, but it was a saturday night, a busy one, so you were constantly being pulled from one patron to another, barely noticing the passage of time as your hands seemed to never stop moving.

but at some point, there he was, sitting at one of your stools, looking at you like he had all the time in the world, a confident, just bordering on arrogant smirk slanting across his face.  you didn’t have the presence of mind or time to appreciate the rest of him, not right now.

but you were paid to treat all customers the same.  and at the end of the day, that’s what he was, at least then.  just another customer on a busy, hectic night.

“what can i get you?” you asked as you mixed a drink for the party at the other end of the counter.  your voice was steady, knowing, friendly, but only just.  

his smirk deepened as he leaned forward.  “all business for the princess, hm?”

your brow furrowed in confusion before you realized where the name had come from.  you absentmindedly adjusted the plastic tiara a birthday party had given you earlier that night - the group of girls around your age had gushed about how delicious their drinks were, how you had made their night, how you just had to have it, how it would look so pretty with your hair.

they were sweet, and they tipped well, so you didn’t push the birthday girl’s hands away when she slid the crown from her head and onto yours, even smiling a bit at the gesture.  it was hard not to smile at women being girls again, and you loved the opportunity to be apart of it.

“princess is my side hustle,” you said to him now, keeping your tone even as you poured the colorful drink you were mixing into two glasses. 

he made a face that you couldn’t decipher before leaning on one of his hands.  “well, listen,” he started, to which you raised a brow.  you didn’t like being told to listen - you just did, it was something you were good at, and being told to made you not want to anymore.  he nodded to the group he came in with.  “my friends over there bet that i couldn’t get your number.  want to help me prove them wrong?”

you turned to drop off the drinks before running his words over in your mind.  you were hit on all the time, another part of the job.  people were attracted to being taken care of, and it was your job to take care of them, which always led to some misunderstandings, some one-sided crushes, some regulars that tipped much more than they needed to.

but something in your stomach dropped at his wording.  you didn’t like it, not at all.

“did they?” you asked, actually focusing on his face for the first time that night as you ran a rag over the counter.  his eyes were blue, so, so, blue, and almost comically confident, unwavering.  as was his smirk, his full lips so perfectly placed and practiced, not quite like a natural habit but more like a learned one.  

and then there was the brutal cut of his jawline, only made more prominent by his scruff of facial hair.  the way his hair curled over the tops of his ears, a youthful but not juvenile look.  his long lashes, elegant nose, flushed complexion, it was a little too perfect, at least for you, right now.

all of his features together appeared more like a masquerade ball mask, not a real, genuine face.  it was off-putting, this actor in front of you, the one you had seen on television so many times.

he hummed in affirmation, smirked deeper. 

you sighed.  “that’s too bad,” you said, to which he gave you what looked like his first genuine expression of the night - one of confusion.  “i only give my number to people who ask for it because they want it.”

you had long ago learned your lesson about being the person someone spent time with in order to please someone else.  it never ended well.

his brow furrowed in further disbelief, complete lack of understanding, maybe a bit of shock, but you only tossed the rag aside and grabbed a glass.  “now, how about a drink?”

he didn’t respond for a second, searching your face for something, maybe an explanation, less probably a spark of remorse.  you let him.  you weren’t going to budge on this, not tonight, not for him.

he shook out of it, literally, a small shake of his head before the mask was back on, in full strength.  “yeah, sure.  just an ipa, whatever you’ve got.”  he addressed you by the name on your name tag, an act you normally hated, but didn’t mind so much now, in his deep tone.

you gave a small grin as you filled a tall glass.  “thank god,” you started.  “after the million mixed drinks i’ve had, you might just be my favorite customer.”  you set the glass down on a paper napkin in front of him, only meaning to meet his eyes for a second.

once you did, though, you did a double take, now trapped in his gaze, completely transfixed on the pure hope you found there, so devastatingly poorly hidden.  this, this was genuine, no mask to be found.  the innocent hope lit up his eyes, his face from within, exposing an almost childlike expression that had you so deeply intrigued.

“yeah?” he asked, his voice no longer oozing with arrogance but instead with something you knew well.  unbridled wanting.  hope, hope, hope.  he might as well have the word please scrawled all over his face in thick marker.

you felt your lips curl up at this new discovery, this crack in his exterior that gave you a sense of deja vu.  “yeah, matthew,” you said, a little slowly, letting the rest of the bar melt away for a second.

this moment felt hot, sticky, like you were both suspended in amber, neither willing to be the first to break eye contact.  

but moments don’t last forever, and suddenly one of his friends was slapping him on the shoulder, saying something loudly about taking too long.  you weren’t really listening as you watched his face again harden into that confident expression.

he ordered a round for his friends, and the moment was gone, lost in the neon light, and you were soon pulled again to another patron, the chaotic rhythm of saturday night overtaking you again.

you didn’t see him for the rest of night, caught up in your work.  towards the end of your shift, though, you happened to look up, towards the door, urged by some magnetic force, and found his gaze awaiting yours right before he walked out of the door.

a real face, a real look, unveiled and vulnerable, swimming with heat and hope and a million other dangerous things.  an expression so true that you had to look away from it’s veracity, complete candor.  when you looked up again, he was gone, and you assumed that would be the last time you saw him.  

so, a couple nights later, deep into your shift, you almost dropped the glass in your hand when you turned and found him sitting on that same stool at your counter, looking up at you expectantly with those storybook eyes.  

“matthew,” you said, softly in greeting, almost a question, confused at his presence, especially on a weeknight, without his teammates.  alone, seemingly.

“princess,” he responded, an imperfect smirk playing across his mouth, revealing more teeth than he had the previous night - enough that you could see the gap between his two front, a little detail so beautiful you might have sighed. 

“no crown tonight,” you responded, half smiling.  

“it was never the crown,” he said, to which you gave a slight shake of your head.  it didn’t hide your shy delight.

“where are your friends?” you prompted, slightly suspicious.  

something that looked like hurt flashed ever so briefly across his eyes.  “they’ll be here, princess, don’t worry.”

you shrugged.  “wasn’t worried.  just wondering why you’re here alone.”

your last word seemed to strip him entirely, lay him bare in front of you, completely vulnerable.  you regretted it immediately, felt almost mean.

“but i guess you’re not alone, right?  you’re here with me?”  you gave him a smile, tried to will one out of him, too, half-succeeded.  “ipa?” you asked, eager to bring this interaction back within the boundaries you were familiar with, ones you could control.

“whatever you’ll give me,” was his odd reply, one that had you scrunch up your face instead of reaching for a glass.  “ipa works.”

your voice was laced with confusion.  “i know it works.  what do you want, though?”

again there was that child-like look in his eyes, veiled by a thin film of doubt, uncertainty.

and somehow you thought you knew what might have been holding him back.  you shifted forward, leaned on your elbows, closer than you had been to him before.  “what if i promise you’ll still be my favorite, hm?  will you tell me then?”

you watched his gaze dip down to your mouth as you spoke, linger there before meeting your eyes again.  not like you minded, much as you wanted.  a spark of warning fired in your stomach.  don’t get too close, it mumbled, you can’t fill anyone’s void.

unfortunately, it was hard to deny the utter satisfaction you felt when he looked at you like this - like you had wiped away all the bad things in the world.

but then hands landed on his shoulders, loud greetings between friends exchanged, ripping you both out of the moment.

“now i know why chucky wanted to come back here,” one of them said eventually, looking at you with a gleam in his eye you didn’t quite like.  “i remember you, beautiful.”

“shame,” you said, “i don’t remember you.”

he put a hand over his heart like he’d been hurt, but his smirk was brutally arrogant, almost animalistic.  “how about we make sure you don’t forget my name again, yeah?”

you rolled your eyes.  “matthew, come get your dog,” you said as you grabbed a couple more glasses and began to pour the same drinks they had ordered the other night.

“you want me to start barking?  ‘cause i will,” the persistent teammate pushed before turning to his side.  “but it seems like you’re the one she’s got on a leash, matthew.”

you watched his face carefully as you slid the drinks their way, interested to see what would win out - the desire to maintain his mask around his friends or whatever was building between you two.

you bit your lip as you watched the internal struggle play out across his face, shooting a pleading look your way for a millisecond.

you decided to throw him a bone, put his friends in their place.  “i meant to tell you.  i put your game on yesterday,” you said to him.  

“did you?” he asked, so blissfully hopeful.

“yeah,” you said, leaning forward again, letting yourself get a truly greedy look at him.  “but i like you better in person.”

you reveled in how desperately pleased he looked by your admission.  

“we were playing too, you know,” someone said, half laughing.

“were you?” you asked, a theatrically confused expression on your face.  you shrugged.  “don’t think i saw you.  maybe i was distracted.”

one of his friends laughed.  “don’t feed him, beautiful, he’ll just keep coming back.”

but you didn’t even look at whoever said the comment, instead completely locked in on matthew, and he on you.  

“god, i hope so,” you said, barely more than a whisper, only meant for him.

just something you said, a true thing, and yet he did.  every couple of days you would look up and there he would be, on that stool at your counter, looking up at you.  sometimes his friends would come, and sometimes they wouldn’t, and on nights he was playing you would always put the game on the television where you could best see it, so you could best see him.

and despite everything he did, everything he said to you, which screamed longing and interest and want, you were surprised every time he came back.  surprised that his interest in you didn’t wear off after the first couple indulgences, like it seemed to with everyone else.

but, then again, matthew struck you as the kind of person who could make a home out of anything, anyone - like the kids who would cry if someone tried to come into their treehouse, as if the magic of the place was defined by it being all for them.  

sometimes this job made you feel like a building with a revolving door, so many faces fading immediately as they came into your life.  it felt so good to have whatever this was, this constant, even if that warning voice tried to convince you it wasn’t real, it wouldn’t last.

one night, when you put his away game on, he was picking fights, antagonizing the other team, all the while chewing on that abused mouthguard, which never failed to catch your attention, send a little shiver down your spine, make you wonder what those teeth would feel like on your bottom lip, your fingers, your neck.

this night, though, the officials had had enough, and handed him a game misconduct.  he skated off the ice, into the tunnel, chants and boos echoing through the arena so loudly that even the television cameras caught their strength.  

still, when the camera focused in on matthew’s face, there was nothing but that cocky, knowing smirk, that one that he had showed you the first day.  that fake one.  you narrowed your eyes at the tv, felt your stomach turn at the fact that he could be two people at once.  how could you ever trust him that way?  how could you ever believe that he really, truly, wanted you?  that warning voice compressed into a lump that settled in your stomach.

the lump was still there that next night, and so was he, there in his usual spot, right before you were about to close.  “missed you, princess,” he said, those blue eyes so full of meaning.  

and you hated how those words meant so much to you.  “yeah?” you asked, wiping down the counter.  “what’d you miss?”

you expected the answer that so many people in your life had given you before: how they liked how you made them feel, how you paid attention to them.  nothing about you, rather something that said more about them.  

so you were stunned when his gaze dropped to you lips and stayed there.  “think i started to dream about your smile,” he said, and you may have sighed, just a little, as you felt your cheeks flush.

“did you watch me?” he asked, that spark of hope lighting up his face in a silent plea.  

you nodded slowly, remembering the game.  “wish you had stayed on the ice longer.”

he shrugged, the motion emphasizing the muscles in his shoulders and neck.  you pretended not to notice.

“why do you smile when they hate you?” you asked, your head tilted in genuine curiosity, recalling his face as he made his way down the tunnel.  

there was that mask again.  “i love it.”

“you don’t,” you said, shaking your head slightly, watched him swallow.

“what?” he asked.  you could have imagined the smallest shake in his voice.

“you don’t.  you do that other smile you do.”  you didn’t tell him your theory, that you knew if a crowd booed loud enough, maybe he could close his eyes and pretend they were cheering, instead.  pretend it was love.

he made a sound that was half-laugh, half-scoff.  “what other smile?”

you bit your lip, unsure how to explain it.  you reached your hands forward, paused for a moment as his eyes widened, so flooded with want.  that beautiful second of expectation before a first touch, the first of what you inherently knew would be many.

“like-” you put your hands on his face, ever so lightly, moved his lips until that cocky smirk was opposite you.  “like this.”

“like this, princess?” he asked through your fingers, his breath on your palms, and heat thrummed in your stomach.  

you nodded slowly, reluctant to take your hands off of him.  “and my favorite one is like this,” you said, moving his lips again until you were satisfied with the replica smile you had created, toothy and wide and beautiful - until you realized he was smiling at you like that anyways, without any manipulation.

you grinned back at him, melted at the simmering heat and longing in his eyes.  before you could question it, you let yourself tap one finger to his front teeth, feeling the gap there, that imperfect feature you had most loved when you first saw it, felt your throat tighten at the way he was looked at you, the way he let his mouth just barely close around your finger.

a feather light motion that made your next breath come out shaky before drawing yourself away.  you hadn’t realized just how close you had drifted towards him, even with the counter between you.

you glanced at the clock on the wall, surprised to see it much later than you expected.  “i need to close,” you said, clearing your throat.  “i need to count the register.”

“okay.”  he looked dazed.  maybe in a cartoon there would have been pink mist or little hearts floating around his head.  

you tried to collect yourself, ignore the phantom of his lips around your finger, a ghost of a kiss, a promise, a plea.

you gave a shake of your head.  “i need to sit there.  the register unlocks from that side, in front of your chair.”

your stomach dropped at the sudden darkness his eyes took on, so much so that you knew you would give in to whatever he said next.  

instead of getting up, he pushed his hips up and back, spread his legs apart, settling deeper into the seat.  “seat’s open, princess,” he said, and the confidence in his voice, all over his face, it wasn’t fake, it wasn’t a mask.

it was real, genuine, set ablaze by your touch.

you looked around.  you were closed, everyone was gone on this monday night, except the owner, a lady older than sin who was mopping in the corner, and who was known for minding her own business.

there was nobody to judge you there, nobody to punish you for giving into this, exactly what you wanted.

time felt like jelly as you made your way around the counter, paused for a beat in front of him before he helped you up onto his lap by your waist, faced you towards the register drawer, let his arms rest around your middle.

“this okay?” he asked softly, his breathy rasp warm on your neck.

you breathed out a yes, slightly overwhelmed by all of this touch at once.  his chest behind you, radiating heat, his thighs firm below you, thick arms around you.  here he was, everywhere, all at the same time, and after only interacting with a counter between you, this felt almost absurdly perfect, forbidden.

so perfect that it took every semblance of your concentration to unlock the register drawer, to push the rise and fall of his chest to the back of your mind, to ignore how your own body seemed to melt into his, relax completely, an utterly miraculous contrast to the stiff, constantly active way you usually were at work.

“still okay?” he asked as he rested his head on your shoulder.  you could feel his facial hair through your thin shirt, smell his cologne, knew you would smell like it, too.  his thighs flexed underneath you, and you could have moaned.  you were having trouble focusing on counting, never mind answering his question.  

he rumbled with a laugh you felt more than heard.  “princess?”

“still okay,” you managed, “but you have to be still.  i need to count.”  

you felt him nod and smile into your shoulder as you got to counting, the rhythm of the bills eventually lining up with the rhythm of his breathing against your back, so peaceful and right that maybe, eventually, you both would have fallen asleep like this.  

“finished,” you whispered when you were done, organizing everything back where it needed to go, soaking up the last few moments of his touch for that night.  

“already?” he asked, although it had probably been half an hour.  

you hummed, pushed yourself up and off of him, even as his hands continued to reach for you, his gaze hungry.  

so hungry it scared you.  you still didn’t quite know if he just wanted someone, or if he wanted you, if he would have acted this way for anyone who asked the right questions, gave him the attention he craved, saw through his mask.  

hungry, hungry, hungry, and what scared you most was that you knew that you weren’t hungry for just anyone.  only for him.  and that question of reciprocation, it was like injecting ice into your blood.

“it’s late,” you said.  “you have to go.”

if he was hurt, he didn’t show it, seemingly completely fine with taking things however slowly you wanted to.  “okay,” he said.  “may i have your number, please?”  there was your favorite smile.

you smiled, despite yourself.  “why?”

maybe it was the late hour that caused him to misspeak when he said, “because i want you.”  he quickly realized his mistake and flushed, only just.  “it!” he corrected, looking like a kid with chocolate he wasn’t supposed to eat schmeared all over his face.  “i meant i want it.”

you fluttered at his mix-up, delighted that maybe he meant what he said.  enough that this time, you didn’t deny his request.

it was a while before you saw him again in person, as he had back to back games and then several away contests before coming home again.  but, like always, you put him on the screen by the bar, feeling yourself warm every time the camera caught his face.

one night, a late night, a couple hours after one of his games had ended, you looked up and you saw him at the doorway.

a bad feeling immediately bloomed inside you.

it had been a tough loss, close until the end, and one of his stupid penalties had forced a power play goal in overtime for the opponent.  worse, this result had been crucial for their playoff bid.  it wasn’t looking good. 

you had not expected to see him tonight - he usually didn’t come by on game nights, only on nights off.  and he didn’t look right as he stood under the neon signs at the door, he looked off.  he looked drunk.

his speech was slow and slurred, making you cringe.  after a couple of years at this job, oh, how you hated drunk people.  oh, how you never wanted to see him like this, so at the mercy of something as truly stupid as alcohol.

and even more so, how you hated to see him drink himself stupid, how you wanted to make everything all better.  you signaled for the bar-back to cover for a moment.

you walked around the counter and approached him.  “matthew,” you began, “what’s going on?”  you tentatively touched his forearm before grabbing one of his hands, wrapping it in both of yours, bitterly aware that he was not present as you were.

“oh, princess,” he said, stumbling just a bit into your grip as you pulled him outside.  he mumbled something you couldn’t hear before laughing, but the laugh was cruel, devastated.

when you were outside, the only audience was the small group of smokers that always hung around the front of the bar.  you took his face in your hands.  “tell me what happened.”

“what happened?” he said slowly.  “what happened?” he repeated, maybe asking himself.  “ruined it, always ruin it, ruin everything.”  his voice came out like a haunted childlike sing-song.  it made your heart shatter.

you looked in his eyes, still holding his face.  “you do not ruin everything, okay?  you just need to go home and sleep this off.”

“princess, princess, always tryna’ make me feel better,” he slurred, letting the whole weight of his head rest in your hands, your fingertips touching the wisps that curled around his ears.  he stumbled forward into you.  “need to kiss you, yeah?  make me feel better.”

you dropped your hands from his cheeks as if you had been scalded.  if your heart wasn’t broken before, it was now, as you pushed his chest away while he leaned forward.  you felt tears begin to prickle on your waterline.  

of course, he wanted you now, when he was begging to be taken care of, when he was outwardly desperate to be reassured, when his vision was probably so impaired that he couldn’t really even see your face.  

of course he wanted you now, when you could have been anyone.

“one of our cabs will take you home,” you said, trying to hide the wobble in your voice as you waved one over, barely able to look at him.  

he pouted.  “what?” he said, teasing, but there was a bite to his tone.  “don’t like me like this?  not your favorite anymore?”

you didn’t have the energy to scoff.  “don’t be mean.  sober up.  goodnight.”  you opened the car door for him, forced him down into the seat.

“don’t you want to kiss me?” he pressed, looked up at you, like he had before so many times from his barstool.  like he had so many times, when it had been different.

oh, how they love to be taken care of.  and look at you, taking care of them.  desperate, foolish girl.

and even now, you couldn’t bring yourself to lie, to say no.  “ask me when you’re not out of your mind.”  you shut the car door and turned away, wiped your eyes with your sleeves quickly and methodically before taking a breath and getting back to the bar, to your job.

but you were a shell of yourself for the rest of the night, his words repeating over and over again in your mind.  make me feel better.

so you blocked his number that you had just added, sighed of relief when one of your colleagues mentioned his team was headed away for a long stretch on the road.  a week and a half without him.  surely, completely isolated from him, you could forget about what happened.

and you half-believed that, until you came into work that next day and realized you would not be completely isolated from him at all.

right next to his stool there sat a bouquet of flowers and a red jersey, folded up.  you already knew what name was on the back.  you stood still at the entrance, reluctant to approach the offering.

“left it earlier,” the owner called from across the room, sweeping.  “i told ‘m to fuck off, but he wouldn’t.”

“thanks anyways,” you said.  

“i asked him why not,” she continued, the barest hint of a smile on her thin lips.  

you furrowed your brow, confused. 

“asked why he wouldn’t fuck off,” she said, “took him a second.”

you breathed out a laugh.  

“said you didn’t know how much he cared, yet.  and he needed you to know.”

you swallowed.  “that’s nice of him,” you said, running the words over in your mind.

“not everyone deserves your second chances,” she said.  “but i don’t let just anyone in our bar before we open.”

the words settled between you like diamond dust.  the owner finished sweeping and left.

you approached the gift, found a note sitting on top of it in terrible handwriting.

i’m sorry, it read, i’m back next thursday.  i’ll ask you then.  you wondered briefly what he was going to ask you before you recalled what he had said to you that night when you put him in a car.  your inability to fully turn him away.

you took a shaky breath as you read the last line of the note.

even if i’m not your favorite, you’re still mine.

your stomach fluttered, surprising you.  so simple, and yet those words meant everything to you.  that even when he got nothing from you, he wanted you still.

you hoped and hoped and hoped he meant it, and you believed it enough that you put the flowers in a vase and wore the jersey for each of his game days.

thursday came faster than you thought it would, probably because of how nervous you were.  in this time apart, anything could be true.  he could mean what he said, he could want you and only you, you could be counting down the minutes until finally kissing him, touching him how you so desired.

deep down, you were so deeply afraid that when he showed up, if he even showed up, that dreamy facade would be broken, and instead all of your greatest worries and insecurities would be realized.  

throughout your whole thursday night shift, you were jittery, versions of how tonight could play out flashing through your mind.  

the entire night flew by, until eventually it was time to close, and you tried to ignore your heart sinking.  maybe this version of tonight, the one with you alone, maybe this one was for the best.

you counted the register, began to mop, waved goodnight to the owner as she left for the night and reminded you to lock up.  

you did your final wipe-down of the counter, feeling the devastation begin to finally set in.  you scrunched up your face, told yourself you wouldn’t cry on your bar top.

“princess.”

you looked up, and there he was, draped in neon light, and for a second it looked like sunlight streaming in through church stained-glass windows.

the sentiment didn’t seem altogether different.  how many prayers had been answered at this bar?  how many homemade temples had been elicited?  how many haphazard gods?

“didn’t think you were coming,” you said as he made his way over to you, sat down on his stool, exactly the same dynamic as that first day, but there was no one else.  only you and him.

“it’s my fault you ever had a doubt,” he said, looking up at you with those blue, blue eyes, an ocean of apology.

you nodded, tossed the rag aside, rested your forearms on the counter and looked at him, eye to eye, and waited for him to say something.

“i’m sorry,” he said simply, and there was no mask to be found, only genuine regret.  “i’m sorry i showed up here the way i did, i’m sorry i embarrassed you at work, i’m sorry i made you feel like just another person.”

you felt your heart stitching itself back together, however painful the process.  he gently took your hands in his, warm and rough and firm.  “you’re not just another person, okay, princess?”  his voice was rough. 

your exhale was choppy, so forced you had to close your eyes for a second.  how long had you waited to hear somebody say that to you?

“you didn’t embarrass me,” you whispered.  “i could never be ashamed of you.”

he gave the smallest laugh, shook his head.  “even now, that’s what you focus on.  how i’m feeling.”

“only because i care about how you’re feeling,” you said, almost defensive.

“you gonna let me care about how you’re feeling?” he asked, his thumbs tracing circles on your palms.  

you stayed quiet, bit your lip, searched his eyes for an trace of doubt, falseness, didn’t find any.  only a slowly simmering flame, drowning in want.

“you’re too far away,” you whispered.

“i’ve always resented this counter,” he said with a hint of a smile. 

you gave a small smile back as you walked around the bar top, finally stood in front of him, exhaled before sitting down on top of him, your legs straddling his hips, your faces only a breath apart.  you clasped your arms around his neck, leaned forward into his chest as his hands settled on your hips.

“ask me,” you all but begged.

his voice was a low rasp, his gaze syrupy with lust.  “don’t you want to kiss me?”

you nodded, and he smiled, and then you were leaning forward, finally capturing his lips in a kiss that felt like neon light and television static and a million pleases, all finally answered with of course, anything for you.

you let yourself melt into his chest, tangled a hand in his curls, felt his grip tighten on the flesh at your hips.

he smiled into your mouth when you ran your tongue along the gap between his front teeth, groaned when you began to move your hips back and forth across his lap.  

you tugged at the curls at the nape of his neck as you felt him grow harder beneath you, to which he bit down ever so lightly on your bottom lip, the feeling even better than what you had imagined all those times you had watched him gnaw on his mouthguard.

he used his grip to set your hips into a rhythm as you ground down on his lap.

“want to taste you so bad, princess,” he breathed into your mouth.  “let me take care of you, yeah?  just want to make you feel good.”

you nodded feverishly, tugged at your clothes as he lifted you off of his lap and rested you back onto the counter.

laid bare for him, you become aware of how wet you already were, perhaps the result of all the waiting, the questioning, the wanting that had existed between you both since the beginning.

he groaned at the sight of you.  “fuck,” he rasped, “so wet already, hm?”  he ran a finger through your folds, brought it to his mouth and sucked.  “who’s this for, princess?”

“for you,” you whimpered, so eager for him to touch you how you wanted.  “for you, matthew.”

“all for me.”  you could hear the satisfaction in his voice before he leaned forward and began to tease you with his tongue, forced a choked moan from your throat.  

one of your hands braced the counter for stability while the other shot forward of its own volition, grasping a handful of his curls, making him grunt.  the noise vibrated through you.

“fuck,” you bit out, overwhelmed.  he pressed his tongue flat against your clit, making your hips push up into him and your grip on his hair tighten.  “fuck, you’re good at that.”

you felt his smile as he pushed two fingers inside of you, began to move them in and out slowly while continuing to tongue your clit.

you moaned loudly as your eyes rolled back, the combination of sensations making it hard to control your breathing, stop your back from arching up off the counter.  

he brought his other hand to your stomach and pressed down, cementing your hips down into the bar top, intensifying every shock of pleasure, immediately bringing you impossibly close.  “fuck, i can’t,” you whimpered, your hand grasping for sheets that weren’t there.  “can’t, shit, so close-”

he lifted his head up, thumbed your clit while curling his fingers slightly inside of you.  “gonna cum for me?” he cooed.

you nodded, eyes scrunched shut.

“cum, then, princess,” he pressed.  “make a mess for me, hm?”

that building wave finally crashed over you, and you gave him exactly what he wanted, reveled in the fact that you could.  

you caught your breath, let out a weak exhale, opened your eyes when you felt him press a light kiss against your hip, on the side of your ribs, up to your collarbone, finally on your lips.

pressed against you, you could feel every inch of him, so hard, immediately making you hungry for him again.  “more,” you pleaded simply.

“yeah?” he rasped against your lips.  “want more of me?”

you palmed his cock in reply, making him hiss, helped him move his clothes aside.  “need to feel you inside me.”

he shifted you off of the counter and against his stool, which you immediately bent over and rested your forearms on.

he groaned, pumped his cock once, twice.  “tell me this is okay, princess.”

you nodded.  “please fuck me, matthew.”

he did as told, pushing inside you entirely, barely giving you any time to adjust before he set a brutal pace, practically splitting you in half.

“holy fuck,” he choked out as you stretched around him.  “shit, you’re so perfect for me.  bein’ so good, princess, stretching for me so well.”

you moaned as you began to adjust to his size, every part of you still so sensitive from your last orgasm.

he built up his rhythm, forceful and deep but never so much that it hurt, only a pleasant pressure that began to build inside of you.

“so deep,” you whined, your voice muffled by your own arm, “fuck, feels so good.”

he grunted in time with a slow thrust in response, making your eyes squeeze shut at the sensation.

“want to see you,” he rasped, hooking one hand around your thigh and flipping you around before pushing back into you, so that now your back was against the stool, your front facing him, one knee bent.  he groaned when your eyes met.  “fuck, like that.”

you reached one arm up to his shoulder for support, rested the other one back against the stool.  your thighs began to shake from the stimulation, making you clench down on him harder, urging another deep moan from him.  

time disappeared as the rhythm of you both continued, so lost in the feeling of him and his noises, so perfect and better than anything you had imagined.

at one point, he brought one of his hands to your clit, began to tease you again with his thumb, while the other hand braced the back of your neck.

“hm, look, princess,” he said, his voice rough with wear, as he forced your gaze down to where your bodies met.  “watch me fuck you, yeah?”

you whimpered at his crudeness, couldn’t tear your eyes away from the sight in front of you, his cock thrusting into you, his hands willing you to the edge again.

he let out a choked laugh.  “oh, you like that, hm?  feel you close.”

“fuck, i’m so close, matthew,” you whimpered, feeling your legs give out.

“‘s okay, princess, ‘m there too,” he mumbled, his motions becoming less controlled.  “cum with me, yeah?  want to feel you cream on my cock.”

you did as he asked, spurred on by his words, the overstimulation.  you felt him reach his high with a groan, warm inside of you, his body collapsing against yours.

you held each other close for several long moments, the only noise between you satisfied breaths and shallow heartbeats.  the air was warm, so peaceful, and you bit back a smile at how this bar was now forever changed - this peace would never leave.

you felt his facial hair scratch gently against your shoulder as his head rested there, so content to simply have you close.  

it could have been a lifetime.  it was probably a minute or two.

he was the first to speak.  “so,” he said, drowsy and sweet, “you guys still open?  how’re my chances of getting a captain and coke?”

you smiled.  how far you had come from the man with the mask asking for anything, maybe an ipa.

if please had been written all over him before, x’s and o’s were now, in pastel pink.

“anything for my favorite,” you said, and he kissed just under your ear.

fin.

[offside-the-lines]

Tie me down, your hands like butter | Matthew Tkachuk

Summary: Matthew thinks silk wrist ties are an exciting pre-team dinner appetizer. And now the boys know. SMUT: 18 + ONLY. MINORS DNI. SAFE SEX RESOURCE. a/n: I live in a world where Matty's hair is longer than it is because I love his curls. Don't @ me. This is my first smutty piece here. Happy new year lol. I also don't typically like to write reader inserts but thought I'd play around with it; and I won't use "y/n" so there's a gratuitous use of "baby". Pairing: Matthew Tkachuk x Female!Reader (Existing relationship) Words: 3K Warnings: Mild bondage (wrist ties), Under negotiated kink (photo exhibitionism), Fingering, Oral sex (fem receiving), PiV, Unprotected sex (wrap it up kiddos), Creampie; Some chirping at the team dinner where the boys know what just happened. Requests: Open | Masterlist

SMUT: 18 + ONLY. MINORS DNI. SAFE SEX RESOURCE.

You felt the cold air brushing over your nipples and tried to focus on steadying your breathing. You wiggled your hands and felt the soft silk tug on your wrists. You couldn’t help but squirm a little, pressing your thighs together. Even though you were comfortable, you felt incredibly exposed. And the anticipation was starting to drive you crazy.

Where the fuck is he, you thought.

And almost like he heard you, you saw your boyfriend stalk out of the closet. He had gotten undressed and was wearing just his boxers and his dress shirt, open so you could see a delicious sliver of chest and abs. Almost instinctually you moved to sit up, trying to reach out to run a hand down his smooth chest. But obviously, you felt the tug of the restraints again.

He smirked. “What are you doing, baby?” He lulled, steps slowing as he walked towards the bed.

The impatience getting to you, “For fuck’s sake Matthew, I know that this teasing is fun for you but come on! It’s killing me”

He threw his head back in a laugh. “Oh yeah? It’s killing you, is it now? Well, tell me, what is it you want?”

You let out a noise of frustration that only comes out as a guttural groan. He knew exactly what he was doing, and the glint of mischief in his eye confirmed it. “Oh come on, really?” 

He giggled and started crawling onto the bed towards you, painfully slow. “Yes, really. I want to hear you say it.”

“Fuck you.” You pouted defiantly while ignoring the heat pooling in your belly. You would definitely have crossed your arms if you could.

“That is the idea, baby. But I want to hear you say it first. Stop being such a brat.” He leaned over you, careful not to touch you. The heat radiated off his skin, making every hair on your body stand on end.

You stared at each other for a long moment, both of your eyes dark and pupils wide in anticipation and hunger, testing each other to see who would break first. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw his boxers twitch; without permission, your eyes were drawn straight to the movement. And the solid shape you saw there, pressing against the fabric, confirmed what you already knew.

“Oh fucking hell, just fucking touch me, Matthew.”

“Oh yeah? Just touch?”

“No, obviously not just touch. I want you to get your hands and your mouth on me, and I want you to fuck me.” He made a deep groan in response, dropping his head to your chest, his soft curls tickling you. “There, are you happy now?”

His head snapped up, eyebrows already raised and mouth cocked in a smirk. “Oh yeah, baby, don’t worry. We are both about to be very happy. Now, was it so hard to ask nicely?” he growled as he moved to straddle you. 

He was leaning above you, his curls falling forward to cast a shadow. With one hand on the bedframe clutching where your hands are tied, he ran his other hand gently down your arm, your side, your waist, before reaching under you to grab your ass firmly. A surprised moan escaped your lips. As your eyes fluttered close at his tight grasp, he leaned in for a hot kiss, firm, pushing you deep into the pillows beneath you.

Slowly, he kissed and suckled down your body, leaving a trail of marks on your neck, chest, and stomach. You would have complained normally, but the anticipation was clouding your mind. He stopped when he reached the band of your lace thong, looking up through his thick eyelashes at your heaving chest, the lack of contact drawing a whine from you. He softly chuckled as he moved to reposition himself between your legs and you let your knees fall to the side before he even had to ask you.

“Eager, are we?” he mumbled into the soft skin of your thigh. But you were too hot and desperate to say anything snarky back, simply arching your hips up to meet him, earning a growl as he leaned back. “Now, now. Baby. You know you’ve got to behave. Don’t make me regret not getting out the leg restraints as well.”

His eyes, usually a sparkly blue, were so dark now, with a ferocious intensity in them. He bit his lip and watched as you tried to quiet your squirming. After a few torturous seconds, he reached down and tore your lace thong in half.

“Tkachuk! What the fuck! Those were expensive,” you shrieked.

“Yeah, yeah… I can afford to buy you more,” he mumbled as he leaned forward and licked his lips.

You wanted to argue, but your mind wasn’t coming up with any more words as your heart thundered, watching his shiny lips open to place a firm suck on your desperate clit. Before you could even react, he moved and licked a firm stripe up your dripping cunt. The sudden contact exactly where you’ve been craving him made you give out a sharp gasp, eyes slamming shut as you pulled hard against your restraints. It hurt your wrists, but you didn’t care, you barely even noticed.

He hummed, clearly pleased with himself, before he lowered himself back down to lick and suck at your clit. You had been craving attention for so long that you couldn’t help but grind your hips to meet him. And surprisingly, he let you for a few seconds before he placed a firm hand across your hips to hold you down.

The attention to your core was quickly becoming more than you could bear and you felt yourself heaving under his heavy touch and firm tongue. You didn’t even have a mind to be embarrassed about the utterly pornographic sounds you were making; too focused on the tight knot of heat gathering extremely quickly in your stomach.

“Oh, Matty, baby. I –” you moaned. And he hummed against you as if to say he knew exactly what you wanted.

He sucked gently at your clit and looked up at you through his lashes and you could feel the smirk on his face as he slid two fingers slowly into your pussy, angling them perfectly to hit the magic spot on the first stroke. A string of curses and moans fell from your lips instantly, as you arched your back.

You were close. So close. You knew it. He knew it. And he seemed quite happy with how quickly you were getting there.

*CHIME* *CHIME*

His phone lit up with a notification that snapped you both out of the moment. He looked up at you, clearly thinking about something. And while his fingers continued to pump in and out of you, brushing your g-spot every time, he sat up and reached over you for his phone.

“What?! Matthew. What are you – Oh my god! What – Oooh…” you tried to yell, but your voice came out breathy and strained as your body was still working towards a release. 

“Don’t worry about it, baby. It’s just Benny. Snap streak to keep, you know how it is.” His voice was so casual you almost thought you had misheard him.

It snapped you out of your pleasure enough to call out. “What?” You tried to sit up but the way his hand was working you and the way your arms were tied firmly above your head meant that you were stuck. And the more his fingers continued to work their magic, the less you could string a thought together.

“I mean come on, baby. You know the boys are going to hound me with questions if I don’t reply. Don’t worry, they’re not going to see anything too revealing, I promise,” he smiled down at you, his hand stopping for a second. His voice was gently asking for permission, and you trusted him implicitly. So, you gave him a lazy smile as you rolled your eyes, hiding your face into the crook of your arm in embarrassment when his fingers started working again.

His fingers knew exactly where to hit you as he used his new position to press the palm over your mound, grinding against your clit; it felt so good that you couldn’t help but let your eyes flutter shut again, lost in the sensation. Without his other hand to hold you down, your hips buckled against him, finding more friction there.

You barely heard him say “Okay done” or the thud of the phone being tossed across the bed. You didn’t miss his warm breath brushing over your ear as he leaned back in, his curls tickling your cheek. You didn’t miss the way he started sucking at the sensitive spot near the base of your neck that drove you crazy. You didn’t miss the way he repositioned himself, using his muscular thighs to pin you down as your hips moved more and more wildly.

“Come for me, baby, I know you’re close,” he growled.

The sound of his deep drawl, thick with desire sent a shiver down your spine. The tension in your belly broke and you felt the wave crash over you, pulsing again and again as you arched into him. His fingers worked you through the orgasm as he peppered kisses gently over your face and neck. 

“Fuck, Matty.” You breathed out finally as focus came back. Your eyes flew open. “Shit, what the hell did you send them?”

His brows furrowed, worried, “Babe, was that too much? I’m sorry. I got a little lost in the moment there… It didn’t have your face in it, okay? Just your hands. Don’t worry.” 

“Okay,” you smiled, “Okay, yeah, that’s fine.”

“I probably shouldn’t have done that, we hadn’t talked about it before, I’m sorry,” he mumbled against your cheeks. His hands were rubbing circles on your waist, and it did calm your mind a little. You knew that the boys would still know exactly what was going on, but you were glad at least they didn’t see the way you looked blissed out underneath Matthew. That was just for him.

So, you leaned up and deepened the kiss, and felt him relax a little. His hands ran up and down your sides, gently stopping to knead your breasts and pinch your nipples. The sensation sent a shock through your body and you suddenly remembered the emptiness you felt and moaned a little into his lips. 

“So, are you gonna fuck me or not?” You mumbled.

You heard a sharp intake of breath as he stiffened, pausing over you. But something about that seemed to convince him you were okay, as he leaned in, pressing his hard member into your thigh. 

He slid his hands up your arms, causing you to shiver under his gentle touch, as he went to untie your wrists, rubbing soft circles on the sorer parts. As soon as your hands were free, you ran your hands down his chest. You always loved the way his muscles rippled above you as he carefully distributed his weight so as to not crush you.

After making out for a few moments longer, the burning heat was solidly back between your legs, and the need to feel him inside you boiling over. You pressed your heel into his ass, trying to get some friction from his hard cock against you. But he still seemed to be taking it slow, feeling a little bad about earlier.

Frustrated, you decided to take the lead, reaching a hand down; you didn’t waste any time, slipping below the waistband, you started stroking his hard length firmly. His breath hitched in his throat and slid into a deep guttural groan, clearly surprised by your sudden movement.

His mouth never leaving yours, he peeled off his shirt and slid his boxers down. With a thigh hitched over his hip, you felt his tip, slick with pre-cum, rub up and down your wet cunt, both moaning into each other’s mouths as he slid into you slowly. 

Taking a few seconds after bottoming out, he started rocking his hips, guiding himself in and out gently. But you wanted more. So much more. You whined; your nails dug into his lower back, hoping he would take the message.

And he did. He pulled back from your lips and shifted himself so both your legs rested higher on his waist. He studied your face, completely still for a moment; his eyes were wild, soft curls forming a curtain around his forehead. 

He must have seen what he wanted because he gave you a smirk before he slid almost all the way out, before slamming back into you, hard and deep. You let out a shocked moan as you felt a warm tingle radiate all over your body. He seemed satisfied with that response, his smirk widening.

Biting down on his swollen lip, he drove himself into you again and again, finding the perfect spot inside you that made you arch up into him in pleasure. Your hands clutched his toned arms for stability, moaning and swearing. Your name fell from his lips again and again as he told you how good you felt. How well you were taking him.

Sensing you were getting close, he reached a hand between you and pinched your nipples hard, before sliding it down to rub a thumb on your clit, never breaking his rhythmic thrusts. The added sensation almost sent you over the edge immediately. As you raised your hips to meet his stroke after stroke, you felt the edges of your vision get fuzzy and your body get blazing hot.

“Matthew, baby, fuck” you called out as your second orgasm crashed into you hard, causing your thighs to shake where they squeezed his torso as you dug your nails into his arm. As he fucked you through your high, you felt his rhythm get frantic as he chased his own.

“Matty, baby, I feel good?”

“Yeah, fuck, you feel amazing.”

“Show me how good I feel. Come on, Matty.”

He let out a deep moan as he thrust a few more times before spilling inside you, his hips stuttering. He collapsed onto his elbows, breathing hard into your hair.

After a few seconds of catching your breath, he mumbled into your ear, “Fuck, that was amazing. You’re amazing.” He kissed you on your cheek, your eyes, your mouth. “I love you.”

“I love you too, baby,” you smiled into his mouth. As he leaned back, you gazed into each other’s eyes, just watching your wide pupils fill with love. You didn’t want to break the moment but, “Alright, Matty, we got to get ready for dinner,” you whispered, tapping him on the arm.

“Urgh,” he grunted, burying himself into your neck. “Why…” he whined.

“Baby, they’re your teammates. We got to go. You want to go.”

“Fine,” he sighed.

*   *   *   *   *

You walk into the restaurant, hand in hand with Matthew. You were running about 20 minutes late. He did decide that he was going to try and convince you to stay home one more time in the shower. Not that you were really complaining.

You spotted Barky across the restaurant who gave you a wave. 

You knew something was up before the two of you even got to the table as you saw the guys nudging each other and snickering. Weird.

“Hey, Chucky. Nice of you two to finally join us. Glad we’re not interrupting a fun evening,” Sam Bennett said with a wink.

That’s when it hit you—the Snap. You felt your face turn beet red as you tried to hide yourself in Matthew’s sleeve.

“Well, Samuel, you gotta please your woman before dragging her to hang out with you boys,” you heard him say cockily.

You groaned, “I should just go home.”

“No, no! Don’t be silly. Come on, sit down,” you heard someone yell. You sat down next to Ekky, not meeting anyone’s eyes, feeling like he was a safe bet.

You placed the napkin across your knees, fiddling with the fold so you didn’t have to look at anyone.

You felt Aaron reach an arm across the back of your chair and give your shoulder a squeeze before leaning over to you and Matthew.

“Don’t worry. We didn’t see anything. Just your hands and some hair,” he said earnestly, leading you to breathe out a sigh of relief as he sat back. Then, he cleared his throat and chuckled.

He leaned back in, “Wrist ties, eh? Kinky,” he whispered to Matthew across you. 

“Oh my god!” you whispered, giving him a slap across the chest. He let out a loud laugh, clutching his chest. Yeah, you should have known Ekblad was a bad bet. Should’ve sat next to Bob, who definitely didn’t use Snapchat.

Matthew, annoyingly, joined in on the laughing as he shrugged smugly. He didn’t think you’d see him put up 3 fingers and mouth “three times” at Bennett before winking; but you did. You reached over and shoved him, causing a sound of surprise as he lost his balance, almost falling out of his chair. 

That caused everyone to laugh, and it seemed for the first time since you walked into the restaurant, the attention was on something else for a second. The Snap was only brought up a few more times that evening, your face turning red hot each time. But it was a good night, as it always was with the boys.

[haddonfieldwhore]

jealousy, jealousy - matthew tkachuk

matthew tkachuk x fem!reader

summary: it takes a bit of help from your friends for matthew to admit his feelings for you

warnings: language, drinking (don’t drive impaired!), implied smut, jealous matty (duh)

word count: 1.3k

“dude, we’re supposed to be celebrating, why do you look so grumpy?” carter asked matthew, who swirled the ice around in his drink as he stared across the bar. carter followed his gaze, his eyes landing on you and a tall guy with dark hair, the man obviously flirting with you as you stared up at him with a smile. “oh, i get it.”

“get what?” matthew snapped.

“you’re jealous that she’s talking to him and not you.”

“i am not jealous. but she’s supposed to be celebrating with us, not ditching us for some guy who’s staring at her like she’s a piece of meat.” matthew scowled, finishing his drink in one gulp and placing the empty glass down on the table with a thud. carter laughed, shaking his head slightly at his friend and leaned over to sam bennett.

“see, jealous,” he whispered, and matthew shot him a glare, but didn’t say anything as he got up and walked over the bar to get another drink.

“i don’t know what to tell you, he’s been in love with her for years. he just doesn’t realize it,” sam told him, taking a sip of his drink.

“she doesn’t realize it either,” nick laughed.

“maybe they just need a little push,” carter suggested.

“is that a good idea?” nick asked, unsure of what carter was planning.

“whatever he has in mind, probably not,” sam grumbled. “just don’t piss chucky off too much, okay? if we want this win streak to keep going we need you in one piece,” he joked, patting verhaeghe on the shoulder. he gave a nod in response, finishing his drink before looking over at you.

“perfect timing. wish me luck,” he said, watching as the guy who had been hitting on you walked away, leaving you all alone.

carter strolled over to you, and you greeted your friend with a smile, feeling slightly buzzed from the alcohol, but not quite drunk yet.

“hey.”

“hey,” he replied. “you wanna dance?”

“sure,” you laughed, dragging him into the sea of bodies on the dance floor. his hands rested on your hips as you danced around, having the time of your life. you were oblivious to the pair of blue eyes locked on you, while carter could feel them burning a whole in him.

“what’s he doing?” he asked sam as he sat back down at their table.

“i think they call it dancing,” he teased. “why do you care so much?”

“i don’t.”

“bullshit,” nick disagreed, and matthew rolled his eyes.

“if you want to dance with her, just ask her,” sam suggested. matthew sipped his drink in silence, his eyes watching the way carter was touching you, spinning you around until you were face to face.

he thought about the way that carter could probably smell your perfume, a mix of amber and sandalwood, and he bet he could even feel your breath on his lips. he bet he was thinking about kissing you, and the idea of it made him furious, his hand clutching his glass so tight he thought it might break.

“chucky -“

“what?” he snapped, looking at sam.

“you like her.”

“we’re friends-“

“bullshit.”

“so what if i did? she doesn’t feel the same.”

“how do you know?” nick asked.

“she’s never said anything,” matthew shrugged.

“neither have you,” sam pointed out, and matthew sighed. maybe he was right.

“it doesn’t matter. it looks like i’ve missed my shot,” matthew sipped his drink, watching you and carter dance; mostly watching you.

“i wouldn’t give up so easily if i were you,” sam replied, and matthew hoped he was right.

the guys watched with a smile as matthew got up and walked over to you and carter. he looked like he wanted to punch verhaeghe in the face, instead they watched as you greeted him with the biggest smile they had seen from you all night.

“mind if i take over for a bit?” matthew asked, and carter stepped back, patting him on the back as he walked by, heading back to the table.

“that was a risky move, swaggy,” sam laughed as he sat back down.

“yeah, i think he’ll forgive me though,” he smiled as they all looked over at you and matthew.

“so you seem to have found your groove again, goals in the last three games? nice work matty.”

“are you saying i sucked?” he asked with a smile, his hands on your waist as he held you close to him, your bodies almost flush against eachother as you looked up at him.

“i didn’t say that,” you laughed. “you were still better than most of the players in the league. now you’re just playing like your old self again.”

“yeah, it feels good,” he smiled, happy to be meeting people’s expectations again; not that he really cared what most of them thought. but he had to admit, hearing it from you made him feel pretty damn good.

“carter must be in a good mood, he never wants to dance,” you laughed, and matthew bit his tongue so he wouldn’t say something rude.

“yeah, the win streak has us all in pretty good spirits,” he said instead, inhaling the scent of your perfume and watching the way your necklace sparkled in the lights.

“you looked upset earlier,” you commented, thinking back to the look on his face when he was sat at the table. “is something bothering you?”

“no, it’s-“ he took a deep breath. “i was just….”

“what is it matty?” you asked, staring up at him with your beautiful eyes, a concerned look on your face as your hand reached up to play with the curls at the base of his neck.

“fuck it,” he mumbled, before leaning down at pressing his lips to yours. you were stunned at first, but quickly kissed back, tugging on his hair gently as he pulled you closer, your other hand resting on his chest.

“he actually did it,” nick laughed back at their table, and he clinked his glass against sam and carters as they laughed at their friend.

“took him long enough,” sam shook his head with a smile. “even back in calgary he had a thing for her.”

when you separated for air, you stared up at matthew, waiting for an explanation.

“i’ve wanted to do that for a really long time.”

“so what you were trying to say is that you were jealous?” you teased playfully, and he blushed lightly.

“i-“ he sighed. “yeah alright; i was.”

“why didn’t you say something sooner?”

“i didn’t know if you felt the same way,” he shrugged, his fingers playing with the hem of your top, and you leaned up to kiss him again.

“well, now that you know… are we gonna stand here all night or are you gonna take me home?” you asked, and he raised an eyebrow.

“you sure?” he asked, a gleam in his eyes as the corner of his mouth twitched upward.

“i mean, if you’d rather stay here with the guys we can-“

“fuck that, let’s go,” he smiled as he dragged you by your wrist gently but quickly towards the door. your table laughed as you guys walked by without a word, and carter was pleased that his plan had worked.

matthews hand didn’t leave your thigh the whole drive to his place as you sat in the passenger seat, pleading with him to not run every red light to get you home faster.

“relax,” you laughed, as he leaned over to kiss you while he tapped his fingers against your thigh impatiently, waiting for the light to go green. “we have two whole days before your next game.”

“good,” he smiled, kissing you one more time as the light changed, and the car rolled forward.

“cause you’re not going anywhere.”

disclaimer: all screenshots, events, and/or interactions depicted in this are a work of fiction. i have no association with any parties mentioned

[turcott3]

back to you

mackie samoskevich x fem estapa! reader

warnings?: cursing, allusions to smut? kind of?, mostly just fluff tho ofc

a/n: this is long af i’m so sorry (i’m not)

masterlist

2008

“mom! mark and mackie are trapping me again!” i yell from the bathroom.

“stop being a wuss y/n.” i hear mark reply.

“please just let me come out.” i beg them. i was always being harassed by mark and his best friend and i never caught a break.

“mark, let’s just let her out okay? she’s been in there long enough.” i hear mackie say.

“ugh fine.” he says opening the door. i stand up off the ground and walk out, wiping the tears that had sprung loose. i didn’t like the way they treated me. i was always being terrorized and i was scared.

“we made her cry dude.”

“that’s sick.”

“okay…..” i hear mackie close out the conversation as i made my way down the stairs to my mother. i sat on the couch with my tear stained face, wrapped in a blanket, watching my favorite movie.

“hey.” i hear a whisper behind the couch.

“mackie?” i ask.

“i’m sorry for locking you in the bathroom y/n. i didn’t mean to make you cry.” he says leaning on the back of the couch.

“it’s okay.” i reply.

“mark likes to do that stuff but i don’t really like doing it to you. i don’t like seeing you cry.” he says and i smile. he runs around the couch to hug me before flying back upstairs before mark notices he’s gone.

-

2014

we all packed into the car to head to mark’s game, which is have been dreading a little less lately. my father putting on classic rock as we make the drive to the rink which became short due to how used to it i was. we find our seats in the rink watching the boys warm up, watching mackie and a few others fly by me every now and then.

“he shoots he scores! mackie samoskevich with the third goal of the game!” the commentator announced as we sat at my brothers hockey game. the crowd overcome with joy for their kids as they got ahead of the opposing team.

“yay mackie!” i yell loudly, my mom chuckling lightly.

“why are you laughing?”

“you two are gonna love each other for the rest of your lives babydoll.” she says adjusting my hat.

“you’re crazy, my only love is harry from one direction.”

“okay y/n.” she laughs, directing her attention back to the game. the game ended wonderfully, mark’s team winning of course.

“alright we’re going to dinner everyone in.” my mom says to mark and i, waving mackie over as well.

“here i’ll sit in the middle.” mackie says smiling at me. we sang and laughed all the way to dinner, mackie and i seemingly closer than before.

“you guys are gross.” mark says coming to the realization at our proximity.

“we are not.”

“are too.” he says turning away and looking out the window.

“mark will you quit, they are literally just sitting next to each other.” my mom says sternly.

“yeah whatever.”

“they’re just mad they aren’t as cool as us.” mackie whispers in my ear, a smile spreading on my face.

‘love each other for the rest of your lives.’ what does she mean?

-

2018

“you kids look great, have so much fun tonight. mark make sure you all get back in one piece.” mom says sending us all out the door. it was my sophomore homecoming.

“you excited?” i ask my boyfriend of 3 months.

“yeah totally.” he says blandly staring at his phone. mark and mackie sat in the front seat chatting amongst themselves. i turn away from him and lean my head on the window, watching the sun set. things had been this way lately. my boyfriend made me feel like i was trying too hard, like he was uninterested.

“alright we’re here. y/n don’t do anything stupid with your boyfriend.” mark says putting the keys in his pockets and walking off. mackie standing behind for just a moment.

“find me if you need anything.” he says earning a nod from me as he walks off to join his best friend.

“let’s go.” my boyfriend huffs, grabbing onto my hand. we find our way into the dance. i look around to see everyone having fun with their dates and friends, meanwhile we sat on a bench barely speaking.

“i’m going to the bathroom.” he speaks to me, standing up and walking away. leaving me alone on this god forsaken bench for losers. many minutes go by and he hasn’t returned.

“what the fuck?” i say looking down at my phone. i stand up adjusting my dress before seeing him dancing in a group of friends, mostly containing girls, his hand tucked firmly on one of their hips. i exhaled loudly, knowing deep down this was happening all along, allowing a tear to escape.

“y/n?” i hear a familiar voice speak.

“oh uh, hey mack.” i say looking at him and then returning my gaze to the floor.

“hey, are you okay? what’s wrong?” he asks noticing my tone and sitting down next to me.

“im breaking up with him.” i say looking back up, mackie following my gaze to him.

“give me your phone.”

“why?”

“give it to me, unlocked.” he demands so i follow. he scrolls to find his name and number in all my socials, blocking him. cutting him out of my life for me.

“thank you.” i say wiping my tears.

“of course y/n.” he says wrapping an arm around my shoulder comfortingly.

“i know you liked him a lot but you deserve better than that.” he speaks after a few moments and i feel his gaze piercing the side of my head.

“i really thought i loved him.” i sigh.

“it hurts i know.” he says, thumb caressing my bicep.

“can we go?” i ask looking into his warm brown eyes.

“yeah of course, come with me.” he says grabbing onto my hand as we hunted mark down.

“hey bud, we gotta go.” mackie says patting my brother on the shoulder.

“why?”

“y/n got, well to put it bluntly, cheated on.” he says simply and marks demeanor changes.

“yeah let’s go, ill catch you guys later” mark says to his friends, grabbing the keys from his pocket and guides us out of the dance. the drive home was quiet, the only thing silencing my cries was the music mark chose to play loudly so i could be alone. once we arrived home i made my way up into my bedroom and changed, not once stopping the tears that left my body. i hear a knock on my door once i’m settled.

“come in.” i say aloud.

“hey y/n,” it’s mackie in his pj pants and umich shirt, ”i’m so sorry about tonight, i’m staying over so let me know if you need anything okay?” he says not stepping in my room.

“thank you mack.” i say smiling lightly, my heart beginning to flutter.

“of course y/n/n.” he smiles shutting my door. the butterflies in my stomach seem to settle over the next hour but never truly going away knowing i could call him in here in two seconds. i zone back into my movie, unfortunately i picked a sad movie on an already sad night, and i started to cry again. i pull out my phone texting him, requesting his presence. moments later i hear a light knock on my door.

“come in.” i say sniffling.

“are you okay?” he asks standing in the door. i shake my head looking down at my hands sitting in my lap.

“hey y/n it’s gonna be okay, we’re here for you.” he says.

“can you come in here?” i ask and he does so shutting the door behind him.

“mark is asleep, i wanted to stay up in case you needed something.” he says walking over and sitting on the floor next to me.

“mack you can sit on the bed, it’s big enough for the both of us.” i giggle lightly.

“i wasn’t sure if you wanted me to.”he says standing up and walking around to sit on the bed with me. i lean back up against my headboard, still allowing slow falling tears. i sniffle loudly, not wanting my nose to run, causing him to look at me and frown.

“y/n.” he says leaning closer and wiping my tears away.

“what?” i ask frowning at him.

“you don’t need to cry, he was an asshole.” he laughs not breaking eye contact.

“yeah but-“

“no buts, he’s not worth your tears.”

“okay,” i say leaning my head on his shoulder as i try to fall sleep.

“you deserve so much better, i hope you see that one day.” i hear him whisper and kiss me on the head as i begin to slip into a peaceful sleep.

‘love each other for the rest of your lives’?

-

summer 2020

quarantine hasn’t been so bad with mark having all his friends over to keep us company.

“hey hey y/n.” mark asks as im about to walk inside.

“can you grab me a drink?” he says.

“yeah.” i say grabbing one from the cooler. i feel eyes staring at me, intensely.

“thanks.” he says taking the drink from me and i return to my chair next to mackie. i lay on my stomach, resting my chin on my forearms shutting my eyes.

“shut up.” i here mackie whisper in a stern tone, the other boys laughing.

“huh?” i say sitting up, clearly having fallen asleep.

“well how was your nap?” mackie asks as i roll onto my back.

“it was great.” i smile at him ignoring the snickering boys behind him. my cheeks burned red as id developed strong feelings since that night i feel asleep on his shoulder and was flustered by his care for my nap.

“i’m glad.” he says returning the smile. after a few hours of laying out in the sun, i make my way inside and sit at the kitchen island after making a sandwich.

“shut the fuck up, please like actually.” i hear mackie say from outside with the boys laughing. shortly after i hear the door open and shut and im greeted by none other than mack himself.

“hey mack, what’s up?”

“they’re driving me insane because gosh dare i look in your direction.” he smirks shaking his head.

“that’s stupid i’m sorry.” i laugh.

“like sorry im enjoying the view.”

“oh?”

“well since i said that, you look great y/n.”

“well thank you.” i blush hiding my cheeks with my hands as my elbows rested on the counter.

“yeah of course, i’m just telling the truth, you look amazing.” he says taking the other half of my sandwich and heading back to the door.

“hey hey no come back here with that.” i say and he pauses, taking steps backwards.

“so you weren’t gonna ask me first?”

“nope.” he smiles.

“we’re splitting it.” i say firmly.

“you have a whole other half.”

“mackie i made a full sandwich because im hungry for a whole sandwich.” i laugh.

“fine.” he says hopping up on the counter next to where i’m sitting, he takes a bite and hands it to me.

“thank you.” i smiled at him flirtatiously taking a bite directly off the part he just ate off of, his face slightly turning rose.

“always gotta share with my favorite estapa.” he smirks.

“favorite?” i raise my eyebrows at him.

“don’t tell mark.” he winks, taking the sandwich back and having another bite, the tension in the room rising.

“i won’t.” i blush as he holds out his pinky for mine to latch onto.

“you gonna come back out with us?” he asks me, handing the last bite back to me.

“honestly no i’m pretty exhausted from the sun.”

“okay i won’t either, think ‘m gonna shower and change. all the guys are probably gonna go out on the boat.”

“you don’t wanna go with them?”

“nah not really, the sun really does suck the life out of you.” he says in an odd tone.

“well i’m gonna go get cleaned up, i will see you in a bit.” i say standing up and pushing my chair in.

“alright me too.” he says hopping down from the counter.

“if you need anything i’ll be in my room.” i say to him as i make my way up the stairs.

“perfect.” he smiles and exits the room. i’d consider that an invitation accepted. i shower and change, melting into the comfort of my bed, hearing the familiar knock.

“come in.” i say, as per usual.

“whatcha doin?” he asks coming in and shutting the door behind him.

“oh i just finished drying my hair about to watch something.” i laugh switching on my tv.

“so what are we watching?” he asks laying down leaning up on his elbow still shirtless but in running shorts, making it hard for me to focus.

“whatever you wanna watch.” i smile and look at him nervously.

“just put on the office or something.” he says.

“but you’ve watched it a million times.”

“yeah well i figured you’d wanna talk so id be able to pay full attention to you.”

“oh okay.” i blush not knowing how to act. after a while of a little small talk, i grew cold at the temperature in the room, goosebumps littering my skin.

“c’mere.” i hear mackie whisper as he pulls me to his chest, heat radiating off of him.

“thank you.”

“yeah of course, i could tell you were cold.” he giggles, running his warm hand up and down my arm, rubbing away the goosebumps.

“you’re so warm how?” i laugh.

“not really sure honestly.” he replies smiling, i roll over to face him.

“like a teddy bear.” i smile.

“your teddy bear only though, got it?” he laughs.

“got it.” i giggle as he places his chin on top of my head and sighs.

“why are you sighing?” i ask, wrapping my arm around his torso.

“oh nothing, don’t worry.” he says as his grin on me becomes firmer.

“oh……. okay.” i say shutting my eyes inhaling his sweet masculine scent, wishing this moment could last forever.

“i wonder where the guys are at.” i say after a few minutes of comfortable silence.

“not sure.” he says simply.

“are you okay?” i ask pulling my head from under his chin to look at him.

“perfectly.” he smiles, pressing a light kiss to my forehead, burning my cheeks red.

“just had to make sure you were good, it’s not like you to not be with them.”

“well, guess i just needed time away from the chaos, time to myself. needed some peace.”

“well you’re not by yourself.”

“i know,” he laughs, “i needed some peace and that’s what i feel when i’m alone with you.”

“oh.” i smile lightly placing my head back under his chin.

‘love each other for the rest of our lives…….’?

-

2021

my feelings for mackie only grew daily after that pool day with all the boys. i practically melt into the floor every time he even speaks to me, which is often. my family and i sat on the couch, watching the draft. several of mark’s teammates were being drafted and we all wanted to support them, mackie being one. it sparked fear in me, the idea of him being whisped away from me.

“the florida panthers are proud to select, from the chicago steel of the ushl, mackie samoskevich.” the man announced as we all jumped for joy, or at least most of us. i was devastated. that’s like an 18 hour drive.

“he’s coming over later tonight so we gotta make him dinner or something. he said he wants to see you guys.” mark says, filling me with anxiety. i get to see him today. as we all quickly scrambled to throw together a meal for him, my mind wouldn’t stop spinning. when is the last time im gonna see him? after an hour or so, the doorbell rings and i sprint to go answer it. i open the door to mackie, dressed still in his hat and jersey.

“hey.” he says smiling at me.

“oh my god i’m so proud of you.” i say practically knocking him over in a hug. he lifts me up off the ground hugging me tightly before setting me down and entering the household, guiding me back in by the small of my back, covering my body in goosebumps at the light touch.

“hey mister draftee.” my mom shouts walking over to hug him, mark following suit.

“we made you dinner.” mark says turning him to the kitchen.

“you guys didn’t have to, thank you so much.” he says smiling gratefully. we sat next to each other at the table as he told us everything about his day. it was exciting and packed full of interviews. i just wish he could stay. once we were done with dinner, i put my plate in the dishwasher and found my way up into my room, barely being able to stand being around him. shortly after, hearing light knocks on my door.

“come in.” i say as the door reveals a lone mackie, shutting the door behind him.

“why’d you come hide out?” he says sitting on the edge of my bed.

“because i couldn’t be down there anymore.” i say keeping my voice from waivering too much.

“why not?” he asks with a concerning tone.

“i’m so happy for you, please understand that but i don’t want you to go mackie, i don’t want you to leave.” i say allowing a single tear to fall.

“oh y/n/n, it’s okay. it won’t be for at least another year or two.” he says reassuringly.

“i know but it’s still gonna happen.” i say using my sleeves to wipe my tears.

“hey no don’t cry, it’s okay. c’mere.” he says as we meet in the middle, hugging into each other tightly, only making me cry more. he held me until i calmed down, rubbing my back soothingly. once we break apart, he removes his hat, placing it on my head.

“keep it, it looks amazing on you.” he smiles as he adjusts it to fit me.

“thank you.” i say quietly, our faces inches apart.

“of course.” he smiles, closing the gap between us, connecting our lips sweetly. eventually, we separate, his hand cupping my cheek.

“i’m not going anywhere, you’ll always have me.” he says as i place my hand back on top of his.

“promise?” i say, my eyes glimmering with hope.

“promise.” he says kissing me again. somehow instinctively, i lay back allowing him to deepen the kiss. i remove the hat from my head, tossing it to the floor as my hands find their way around his shoulders, keeping him close to me. allowing myself to let loose and give into his touch, removing our clothes one piece at a time, never wanting to separate our lips that seemed to be made for each other.

“don’t stop please.” i say as we break apart for a moment, locking eyes.

“are you sure?”

“yes i’m sure.”

“whatever you want.” he smiles reconnecting our lips, fireworks setting off in my stomach. i was nervous beyond belief but i knew i could trust him. his lips trailing down my jaw to my neck, peppering my exposed skin with kisses, his hands holding me gently as though i was made of glass, allowing myself to relax into his touch and trust his guidance into something i had never experienced.

-

my first time having sex was with the boy i’ve loved since i was a little girl and i couldn’t imagine it any other way.

“how are you feeling, do you need anything?” he asks as i trace shapes on his bare chest.

“i’m okay thank you though.” i reply and he kisses me on the head.

“of course.”

“i need to-“

“woah and just where do you think you’re going?” he asks grabbing onto my hand.

“i was gonna go check the pantry.”

“baby no, come back here, i’ll order us some doordash later okay?”

“okay.” i say, crawling back into his grasp.

“can you stay over tonight? well i mean you don’t have to if you don’t want to but i kinda would like you to.” i ask running my fingers through his dark hair.

“yeah of course i can, let me text my mom. and yes i do want to.” he says grabbing his phone off the night stand, ignoring the texts from mark and all his friends and family.

“you should answer them.” i say.

“i’ll get around to it later, all i care about right now is being here with you.” he says texting his mother, then setting his phone down on dnd.

“oh, okay.” i say blushing, looking away from his face.

“are you going to regret this tomorrow?” i ask out of the blue and he looks down at me like i just said the most outlandish thing ever.

“baby no, of course not. it was so special how could i ever regret having sex with you. it was so intimate and beautiful, especially since it was your first time, i’m glad it was me so i could make sure you had a good experience.” he explains, my heart fluttering at his words.

“okay, thank you for reassuring me.”

“always.” he says kissing me lightly on the lips.

“and it was more than good mackie, you’re absolutely fucking amazing and also very beautiful. i’ve never felt so connected to someone, no pun intended.” i say giggling at the end.

“you may not have been my first but god damn you were the best, so so beautiful baby.” he says smiling and littering my neck with light kisses as my fingers find my way back into his soft curls.

“i never want you to leave mackie.”

“honestly, i’m starting to question it myself too.” he smiles and we laugh as his thumb brushes my side lightly, his grip on me sending butterflies through my whole body.

‘love each other for the rest of our lives.’

-

may 2023

it was the morning of mackie leaving for development camp in florida and i’m devastated. we never made anything official but we were always together for the last two years. attached at the hip, so hopelessly in love with him.

“i’m coming over in a few, i already have all my stuff packed.” he says over the phone while i get dressed.

“okay, how long does it take to get to the airport?” i ask him.

“like an hour probably.” he replies.

“okay ill see you in a few mack.”

“alright bye.” he says hanging up. i wish i could just tell him how i feel but i can’t. a few minutes later hearing my front door open. i spray on my perfume and bolt down the stairs.

“mackie!” i say hugging him.

“hey y/n.” he says returning the hug.

“are you ready to go?”

“oh uh, my flight is actually tomorrow. i wanted to spend the day here before i left.” he says.

“i’m the only one here though? mark is at his girlfriends.” i say.

“maybe that’s because i wanted to come spend the day with you.” he smiles pushing his suitcase handle down.

“really?”

“yes.” he laughs.

“oh thank you.” i say hugging him again.

“wanted to come spend my last day in michigan with my favorite girl.” he says rubbing his thumb over my cheekbone. i hold onto his hand as he guides me up the stairs back into my room. he lays down on my bed opening his arms for me to lay with him, which i quickly do.

“i wish you didn’t have to leave.” i say quietly.

“i know, but i need to.”

“promise you won’t forget about me?”

“no, i could never forget about you. i’ll fly you down to come see me whenever you want okay?” he says brushing hair out of my face.

“are you sure? i don’t want to hold you back.” i reply.

“you would not be holding me back, i am not looking for anyone okay. no one can replace you.” he mumbles into my hair kissing me.

“mackie.”

“y/n.”

“i’m gonna miss you so much.” i say skipping over what i was going to say.

“i’m gonna miss you more sweet girl.” he says smiling kissing me. after a good night together, we wake up bright and early to take him to the airport.

“mackie.” i say softly shaking him awake.

“what?” he groans.

“it’s time to go to the airport.” i say whispering kissing him on the shoulder.

“let me put a shirt on.” he says sitting up and stretching, his raspy morning voice driving me insane.

“all your stuff is downstairs ready to go.” i say sliding on a pair of shorts.

“let’s go.” he says exiting my room. we get into the car and i put in the directions.

“so are you excited?” i ask him.

“i am excited but im sad to leave here.” he sighs.

“why?”

“because i’m leaving my whole life behind, my friends, and you.” he says sliding his hand into my thigh and resting it there

“well this is gonna be good for you okay? we’ll all still be here.”

“i know but i can’t just pull up to your house to see you now.” he laughs.

“true true.” i reply, the rest of the car ride goes smoothly and we arrive at the airport. we park and i go in with him, not quite ready to leave his side.

“well this is where i have to leave you.” he laughs looking up at security check in.

“bye mack.”

“bye baby.” he says hugging me tightly, kissing me on the head and then the lips after pulling away.

“i’ll see you soon okay?” he says holding my cheeks in his hands.

“okay.” i smile weakly. he kisses me lightly on the forehead one last time before turning away and walking into security. i stand there and watch his license get checked and boarding pass scanned before he disappears into security.

“i love you mackie.” i whisper to myself before exiting the airport and walking back to his car that he is so graciously letting me borrow. i shut the door and sat in the car in silence, admiring the way it still smelled like his cologne and the way he left a bracelet wrapped around the gear shift. i remove it and place it on my wrist, slightly dangling at the size difference but still i admired it. i turned the car on and made my way back home, pulling into my driveway.

“glad you made it home safe, how’s his car?” my mom asks.

“oh it’s great.” i smile.

“don’t worry babe, you’ll see him soon.” she smiles hugging me.

“hopefully.” i smile making my way upstairs.

“mark?” i ask knocking on his door lightly, mackie having been dropped off two hours ago.

“come in.” he replies.

“hey.” i say, tears filling my eyes.

“what’s up?” he asks setting his controller down.

“can i uh, can i talk to you?”

“yeah of course. what’s up?” he says a tear exiting my eye.

“please don’t be mad when i tell you this.”

“y/n don’t cry, whatever it is i can’t possibly mad at you for.” he admits, his voice calming me down. in recent years he’d become a much kinder older brother.

“i love mackie. like love love him and i don’t want you to be mad at me, which im sure you will but please you have to understand.” i say to him which he starts laughing.

“why are you laughing?”

“you think i didn’t already know that you love him?” he asks.

“well….. no.”

“oh y/n come here.” he says opening his arms and hugging me.

“i’ve known you loved him for years, i’ve been watching it unfold.” he says.

“so you aren’t mad?” i say pulling away.

“no of course i’m not. you’re my sister and he’s my best friend. i want you guys to be happy, and if you’re happy together then i have no complaints.” he laughs.

“i did not expect this.” i laugh wiping my tears.

“the real question is, have you told him yet?” he asks genuinely.

“i haven’t, he’s gone now.”

“well why don’t you go see him at the start of the season? i don’t want you to keep it from him y/n/n.”

“i’ll talk to mom.”

“she’ll say yes.”

“how do you know?”

“you really think her and i haven’t talked about you two?”

“oh.” i reply slightly embarrassed, “well thank you for the talk, i love you.”

“i love you too.” he replies, we never speak to each other this way but it felt right after the talk we just had. our relationship steadily improving by the day.

-

october 2023

the first game of the preseason is in one day and my mom is flying me down to see him play.

“have a safe flight hun, text me when you land.” my mom says as i hang up and board my flight. i tell mackie i have a lab exam so he doesn’t get suspicious as to why i don’t answer for 3 hours. once i land, i uber to my hotel, anxiously waiting for it to be the next day, going to bed extra early even.

“meet your 23 florida panthers at our pregame meet and greet and arrival.” i read the tweet aloud to myself. i put on his hat from the draft and the crewneck i ordered a few weeks ago and head out of my hotel room to the location of the event, keeping my head low. as the event begins the players all enter the fenced area to greet anxious fans, when i see mackie walk out i practically fall to the floor. slowly, i approach him as he’s talking to a teammate.

“hey what do you- oh my god.” he says as i look up and he gets a good look at me.

“hi mack.” i smile as he picks me up in a hug like he hasn’t seen me in years.

“hi y/n.” he smiles, interlocking our fingers and finding a less populated area.

“i’m so happy you’re here.”

“me too, i booked my trip literally two days ago.” i laugh.

“you’re too good to me.” he says.

“i have something i need to tell you and i feel like now is the best time since you have a game in a few hours.” i say holding my breath.

“yeah what is it? did you pass your exam?”

“i didn’t take one dumbass.” i laugh and his gaze never faulters.

“i love you mack. like so much, and i’ve been keeping this from you for so long because i didn’t know how you would react.” i finally confess. barely catching him off guard.

“oh you’re fucking incredible y/n i love you more baby, so much more.” he simply replies kissing me sweetly, allowing the moment to dwindle as long as possible.

“let’s go say hey to the kids yeah?” he asks grabbing onto my hand again. my face showing how shocked i am at his reaction or lack there of.

“yeah ok, are all the girlfriends and wives here too, i need to have someone to sit with.” i ask snapping back into reality.

“yeah they’re here, and now i have mine.”

“yours?”

“baby, you’ve been all mine since my draft day, at least to me you have been. i didn’t look at another woman the way i look at you, i didn’t even entertain anyone, i was just too scared to ask you out because of mark.” he laughs.

“mack he knows i love you, i told him first and well let’s just say he’s known for years.”

“well i mean it all works out right.” he smiles.

“yeah it does. it feels good to be yours.”

“same he- hey buddy what’s up.” he says holding out his fist for a small fan.

“you’re my favorite player ever!” the little boy confesses sporting a michigan hockey tshirt.

“thank you buddy.” he says squatting down for a picture with the young fan. he has small talk with his parents before they move onto the next.

“you’re so precious.” i whisper in his ear.

“well it helps because i’m happy you’re here with me.” he replies kissing me on the cheek.

-

present

“baby?” mackie yells walking in the door with his bag of gear.

“in here,” i replied from the bedroom. mackie and i made it official that day in october and ive been doing most of my school online.

“how’d you do on your exam?” he asks walking in, my eyes directing towards is damp, dark curls.

“i got an 87, so better than i thought.” i smiled.

“good i’m glad.” he says walking over and kissing me on the head and taking a seat next to me.

“i bought your christmas gift today.” he smiles.

“oh did you?”

“i sure did.”

“what’d you get me?”

“and that’s the question where i stop answering.” he laughs.

“damnit.” i reply.

“let’s go watch a movie baby.” he says shutting my laptop, and picking me up off the bed.

“didn’t even give me a chance to answer.”

“it wasn’t a question.” he laughs tossing me on the couch and climbing over me, laying his head on my chest, my fingers instinctively finding their way into his dark locks.

“you know what my mom told me at one of your games when we were little?” i say breaking the focus from the movie.

“no what’d she say?” he asks.

“i still remember her exact words, ‘you two will love each other for the rest of your lives babydoll’.”

“she said that?” he asks sitting up

“yes, i’ve loved you since i was 8 mackie. she was right and i never wanted to admit it to myself until that night of the draft but i never told you, i was too scared you wouldn’t feel the same.”

“would it kill you to say i’ve loved you since then too.” he laughs.

“no shot.”

“yep you heard me, since i was 9 years old. and draft night really confirmed it for me too, i waited patiently. and that one pool day, where we shared the sandwich? i was falling for you so hard y/n, like you don’t even understand.”

“wait really?” i giggle.

“yes oh my god, i didn’t wanna leave your bed or you. i just wanted to lay there together. i never wanted the boys to come back.” he laughs.

“how did it take us this long to get here?” i ask.

“it doesn’t matter how long it took, what matters is that we’re here, together, now, and i wouldn’t change a thing about it.” he smiles.

“what do you see in our future?” i ask him.

“well, getting married to you has been on my mind since i was like 13 but now that we’re adults that can actually happen.”

“oh really?” i laugh.

“yep, and we can start a family and buy a house and get a dog.”

“we could.” i smile at him pausing briefly, “i love you mackie.”

“i love you more.” he replies kissing me deeply.

and it turns out mom was right, we do love each other, and definitely for the rest of our lives.