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#Erica tries briefly (also in S4) to sit on the couch but he doesn't allow her the space
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1 year
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grief is like a really ugly couch
I think grief is like a really ugly couch. It never goes away. You can decorate around it; you can slap a doily on top of it; you can push it to the corner of the room—but eventually, you learn to live with it. ― Jodi Picoult, Leaving Time
#the mentalist
#quotes
#patrick jane
#i would say web weaving but there's not a lot of web weaving happening
#initially I also had a bit of an essay accompanying this but it disappeared because of a tumblr glitch + my own stupidity
#and i'm too tired to write it prettily but i still wanna write it so it'll be in the tags
#a cute little fun surprise for whoever cares about and reads tags
#so i made a different post talking about jane's grief but i was upset i didn't have enough space for the couch (pun unintended)
#and i was thinking this morning about this quote and jane's couch and how it could be interpreted as a physical manifestation of his grief
#as well as his willingness to open up to people
#1. i love grief; grief is important to me. grief is permanent and i have been aware of grief in a form of another (in my own personal life)
#for a very very very long time. so to see it in this show is...significant to me. i cherish this
#now onto the actual analyzing. of course they never intended the couch to be a symbol for grief; but it becomes so.
#he leans on the couch when he opens the Red John files; for support most likely - and it's a beginning of the process of dealing with grief
#he is the only one who uses the couch. everyone knows it as jane's couch
#in S4E23 Cho uses it briefly to rest and Rigsby asks him if Jane knows he's using his couch
#Erica tries briefly (also in S4) to sit on the couch but he doesn't allow her the space
#in fact the only two people we see that use the couch are Teresa Lisbon and Dennis Abbott
#and this is the part about emotional availability. he only shares the couch with people whom he trusts
#With Lisbon twice even
#the couch is grief and the couch is love; the couch is support
#there's nostalgia for the CBI times but there's also more to it
#and that quote makes me go absolutely feral because
#'eventually you learn to live with it' 😭 eventually you learn to live with grief and eventually you learn to accept it as part from yself
#andand he is happy to see the couch; he missed the couch
#-> you are not free from your grief but in healing you learn that it's okay; you cherish your grief; it was there with you and for you
#yea anyways i will never not go mad about grief and trauma and how it's portrayed and handled.
#and i already have 2 more sorta-proper essays that i want to write on the topic asdgfhdhjk. yea i'm literally not gonna stop
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