#Even as may sabotaged her own success in something she enjoyed making herself miserable and further hated by her sister

[mushroom-for-art]

Me writing the most self indulgent shit ever known to mankind lmao, also known as putting May through the pain suffering just because but this time it's Digimon, featuring our favourite horrid REDACTED belonging to @oogaboogaspookyman, he's here to be a cunt really, this is pretty dialogue heavy as lmao its basically just him bullying the shit out of her at her weakest point and rambling about things that would've happened previously in the time line and discussing May's troubled relationship post digimon time lmao, again self indulgent I just had these really specific scenes and gotta get them out lmao

Corruption

Digital energy crackled and pixelated from the unusual vortex in front of them, the crowd hushed and murmured in terror as something from within the blackness pushed forwards through into their world. May put herself at the front of the group shielding her siblings from view the best she could as Lopmon stood by her feet, ears spread to look more intimidating. Dripping dark energy pushed from the portal as sparks of red lightning cracked and whipped around shorting nearby electrical appliances as an unfortunately, familiar grinning maws greeted them, it didn't even try to look humanoid as a mouth closed and opened into a black eye with a frantic white pupil. The pupil bounced around scanning over the horrified faces of the people as its many mouths pulled into delighted grins with teeth large and sharp, a deep echoing laugh coming from each mouth and even the visible eye as it surveyed the terror gladly eating it up before its eye fell upon the three siblings narrowing to a pinpoint before blowing wide in entertainment and excitement.

"How, small and pitiful you all look, my even tinier than you were before."

It's voice mocked from its eyeball, still laughing from its mouths, the eye blinked into a mouth as other mouths closed and opened into eyes scanning around in an erratic manner, though more so to make them uncomfortable, this beast didn't know fear.

"I bet I could splatter you like insects right now, decorate your disease ridden world with your bright gorgeous blood."

"Then why don't you, you Prick." May's voice was cold and sharp as she glared taking a challenging step forward, "oh yea I know why, because you can't interact with this world, your data is too much and you can't fully come through so you just sit there and taunt trying to make us scared, trying to terrify people while you plot a way into this world. It didn't work last time though did it? And I'm not going to fucking let you try again." An eye fell upon her watching her as its other mouths twisted and contorted out of shape.

"Then why don't you come and stop me?"

It asked simply as it started to pull backwards into the portal, the pavement splitting from the ground beginning to float as the portal moved awkwardly into the sky, the slabs of pavement swirling around it as the creature grinned at them.

"Well, digidestine? Can you stop me this time? Or have you already lost too much?"

As its form disappeared, May could only grit her teeth as Lopmon looked up at her for guidance.

"We can't go through that portal May, times synced now in the digital world, we'll lose real time here. Let some other people deal with it, we can't be the digidestine anymore." Her sister spoke behind her and May looked at in confusion and disbelief at what she was hearing, even Salmon looked uncomfortable at the idea they weren't going to do something nuzzling into her sisters leg, May opened her mouth to argue that there was no one else they'd met no other younger digidestine.

"No." Matts voice snapped, "look you might have gotten out of that ordeal fine 10 years ago, but some of us did lose too fucking much!" His voice was a snarl as he moved to touch where his lower arm had been removed from his body, Labramon whimpered against Matt as he crouched on the floor, guilt and shame washing through May making her heart hurt. "You might not be so lucky next time, I wasn't." His words stabbed into her as she looked at him, her sister nodded a bit awkwardly adding.

"We got really banged up last time, I mean, you've seen the scars I got, you've seen what happened to Matt, you got off easy but you're not indestructible." May's hands clenched into fists, their words becoming poisoned jabs, snide hateful remarks for years and years, snipping snapping biting into her over and over as her eyes became wet with frustration.

"Fine. I wasn't even going to fucking ask you to come. I'll fucking deal with this myself." She turned walking away from them quickly, "let the weakest link smash that cunts face in!" Her voice a frustrated yell as she leapt onto a floating pave slab with Lopmon leaping up behind her following.

"May don't be fucking stupid for once in your life!" Her sisters words fell on deaf ears as she leapt and flipped up the platforms with acrobatic precision, ignoring her sister cussing her out insulting her, as she got closer to the portal the air felt static like as Lopmon flew up besides her, digital energy engulfed them both as they disappeared through the dark of the portal.

The local advertising screens came to life displaying the digital island they'd found themselves upon years ago as Dianamon landed gracefully but with force. She walked with a dangerous tremor in her step, "Where are you?! Come out you coward. Let's end this!" May and Lopmons voice overlapped creating an almost new voice as they scowled around looking for the black ink beast. She heard him laughing before she saw him, barely dodging a large black spike that ripped through the ground and would have went right through her.

"My my, all on your own? No siblings to back you up? No lover? Oh yes I forgot, he replaced you didn't he?"

She slashed at him with her moon sickle slicing through the black inky body as the ink fell to the ground with a splat before crawling away to a larger mass of blackness as the creature took form again, still inhuman with eyes and teeth grinning at her. She lunged at him again swinging and striking with her weapon, retreating to draw back her bow and shoot arrows through his inky substance splatting it off and watching it disintegrate. She wasn't going to amuse his games. Despite her attacking he seemed pleased simply reforming lost mass to sustain himself as he dodged or allowed her to slash his form just to pull himself up somewhere else.

"I suppose it does make sense. I mean, you always held them together, you were the link in their chain that strengthened them and how do they respond to that?"

He laughed a wicked laugh as a morphed pale form of her sister pulled through the black slime walking towards her with hollow black eyes. When it spoke it used her voice, it sounded distant like a recording rather than the vocal mimicry it did for its usual voice.

"Why do you always ruin things for me?! You're so fucking selfish you know why are you even in this fucking contest?! You just want to show me up! And are you happy?! I only came second because you fucked with my brain! Why the fuck would you go 'best of luck sis', don't you have any idea how much fucking pressure that puts on me to perform well when I know you're just going to do better?! You're such a shitty person sometimes May, I wish you'd fucking disappear sometimes!!"

Her sisters voice screamed at her even if it felt distant, May leapt back as the fake hollow version of her sister collapsed into black sludge as his voice laughed mockingly before tutting.

"Aw, now that really wasn't very kind."

It doubled over on itself laughing as its mouths snapped with teeth and its eyes rolled around.

"I mean, she was right, you were always better at the gymnast stuff. That must put an awful lot of pressure on her, funny though, you never ever won, not even third."

It straightened to look at her twisting it's head as it leant forward, it's body turned to sludge by another swing of the moon blade but that didn't stop it talking.

"Kind of stupid of her not to notice, why did you never tell her huh? Why did you ruin your own performances with rookie mistakes on purpose to receive worse points when she hated you for even being there? For daring exist?"

She gripped her weapon tightly, not giving it the satisfaction of an answer as it cackled dark ink encircling her and grabbing at her ankles before she slashed it away and flew up to avoid his mocking grabs.

"Oh that's right, because you loved her or something. When was the last time she was kind to you May? When was the last time you felt loved by your sister and not just shame and hatred?"

Dianamon shook her head to rid his voice from her ears, she couldn't afford to think of individual components right now, she was Dianamon now, she can be May later, she couldn't risk dedigivolving and losing her advantage. It seemed to sense her struggling shooting up black tendrils that slammed her back into the ground with a sickening crunch of something and a horrid gasp of pain from the celestial Digimon as she forced herself to her feet before the ink tried to consume her.

"You really struggle and fight so much for people that seem to loathe you, most of the world doesn't know you exist and yet here you are fighting to try to save it, but when has the world ever done anything for you? I know none of you received acknowledgement for what happened ten years ago, doesn't that make your blood boil in rage? That you risked life and well, your brothers limb and all you got was the terror and fear screaming, crying for help as you cradled your unconscious brother as his arm bled new blood."

Its mouth quirked into a wicked smile as her expression darkened knowing it had touched a nerve. She slashed and attacked with everything she had yelling in anger and pain trying to destroy him as his corrupted data mass remained consistent allowing flecks to crumble away to make a form to be slashed to keep her eye to exhaust her as it laughed at her torment. From the ink a pale Matt formed looking at her with bleeding black eyes as it too approached her.

"Look you might have gotten out of that ordeal fine 10 years ago, but some of us did lose too fucking much!"

His voice was distant like a recording once more as it parroted back things that had been said. More and more words came from its blackened mouth phrases that she'd heard throughout the years since coming back, passive aggressive 'good for you's, snarly snapping remarks, and things she hadn't heard, spiteful bitter whispers of 'why me', a cold harsh 'it should have been her,' that made her throat go dry and heart almost clench as though grabbed and crushed, Dianamon couldn't afford to cry and yet her eyes watered and her grip on her weapon trembled.

Once more the pale clone copy collapsed back into the blackness as it taunted and laughed.

"What a cruel thing to say! He said it often as well, oh how he wished you had suffered instead of him, he thinks it's unfair, unjust, that he didn't deserve it, how funny he believes that you in turn did deserve it. Its quite funny actually! I suppose it's because you never told him the full truth did you? I mean, you wouldn't have dared he lost his arm. Who are you to tell him it was going to be worse? And that you stopped it being worse like some savior when he was going through such a horrible affair, you would've looked like quite the dick, I can understand why you kept it to yourself."

Dianamons made more empty slashes at her tormentor, snarling "JUST SHUT UP AND DIE! I'LL DESTROY US BOTH IF IT STOPS YOU FUCKING TALKING!!" But it only cackled at her swirling and forming eyes and taunting mouths as it without her knowledge began to destroy the data around them, disintegrating trees and rocks leveling the area slowly.

"How fittingly self-destructive. You always did value others more than yourself."

Another hollow pale form, this time herself, or well the form of May, Dianamon struggled to maintain its own identity as the voice of May parroted from the past spoke.

"Please god don't hurt him! He's my baby brother, please you can take anything from me, humans, we have all kinds of interesting organs! Yea yea, I'll trade you, you could have my kidney! And you give him back yes? Please, I am begging you please take from me don't hurt him my skin, my hair, my eyes, my lungs Fuck you could take my heart kill me right now just just please, please let him go, please, he means too much to me I will do anything just don't please don't take him from me please"

Dianamons eyes watered uncomfortably at sickening memories from the past, her brother unconscious as an Archnemon regards him for experimentation for devouring planning to hack him apart and then dissolve his flesh. The hollow stared forward and through her before screaming horribly as it was cut open by nothing, Dianamon tearing her eyes away cringing and exhaling a shaky breath through her nose at they remembered the sensation of large hands plunging into her guts and pulling out what it wanted, the carving of her organs and the teeth, the horrid teeth that sank into her wound ripping her flesh away from her body and the sickening enjoyment the Archnemon had taken from the experience, helplessly caught in the creature web, and then the guilt and horror as it took a cleavor and-

Dark tendrils slammed her chest sending her flying backwards hitting the ground and bouncing slightly as she cried out her weapon flying from her hands and disintegrating before it hit the ground as she weakly hauled herself into a kneel.

"That was a dirty move." She snapped, but her component's were struggling, tears ran out of one eye at the guilt of not being able to stop the twisted digimon from taking her brothers arm. It only laughed at her in enjoyment feeling her terror, guilt and pain with great satisfaction. She pulled herself to stand but her body was struggling, the phantom pains still ripping away at her body as she shuddered, she'd never told anyone about what happened, not the truth at least. Dianamon shook her head, May had never told anyone but she was not May right now.

Black ink shot out in the form of a large hand grabbing her body and began to squeeze before she could even move, her armor crushing uncomfortably into her body as the entity pulled itself up out the ink and took on a painfully familiar form, it copied the face and body of, someone May once cared deeply for, another crush from the hand engulfing her body and Dianamon faded. Lopmon fell to the ground with a weak groan as May remained crushed in the grip.

"Lopmon run!" May attempted to struggle as the tired rookie pushed itself to stand stumbling before the ink wrapped around its body dragging the bunny-like digimon by its ankles to the twisted form of May's old crush. They tried to attack, opening their mouth weakly to summon energy before the pale humanoid grabbed its mouth shut harshly with a snarl.

"Behave little one, would be a shame to destroy something that could be of use to me. Besides, i'll kill your human if you're a brat."

Lopmon whimpered but couldn't fight, too injured and tired from being Dianamon, and May was weakening too. It looked over at her and slowly the large hand pulled down into the earth releasing and leaving her standing though with difficulty she swayed and gave a weak glare as it scoffed at her before it was right in front of her with astonishing speeds it's pale hands grabbing her face, Lopmon tossed aside, as it arched over her threateningly, grinning with too many teeth at the wonderful fear from her.

"You've always intrigued me, such fight such love and for what?"

It's grip tightened threateningly on her face as she tried to pull away and shake her head sinking in claws to draw blood making her still as Lopmon was restrained in dark inky tendrils, the surroundings barren now save for his corrupting black ink.

"Don't make me pop out your eyeballs~"

It's tone faked sweetness as his thumbs pressed under her eyes threateningly.

"It's a shame he gave you up the way he did, choosing another woman while you were kept apart by distance, it's like everything you went through meant nothing to him, like he didn't care about the bantering you shared, the stories the company, do you think he thought of you as much as you him? It must hurt knowing you don't matter so much to someone, that they can replace you just like that."

A finger snapped for emphasis on another arm before it disappeared, his tone was quieter than usual it was almost sympathetic comforting as her eyes began to water against her control, tears rolling down her cheeks as she struggled to breathe, all the repressed feelings all the times she made herself be strong crashing down on her so now she was weak, bubbling pathetically under her worst enemies watching gaze as she cried against her control. She was unloved and despised, she wasn't enough for the people she cared deeply about and she couldn't stop him she couldn't protect them she couldn't save the world from his plans to destroy it and now he was going to kill her, and the worst part was she was alone. The people she loved weren't coming to save her. Her breathing choked as her knees felt weak. She wanted to rip his hands from her face to just collapse and cry to pull her eyes away but he held her firm and her eyes were locked to his.

"Sweet little thing, all alone and unloved. You tried so hard to be the best you could be and to be good enough, you sacrificed so much of yourself, didn't you?"

She choked a breath, her head nodding against her control as her knees gave out and desperately grabbing at his arms fearing that she would fall and he would simply pull and rip her head from her body, but the tug never came, his hands didn't move as she gripped to him weakly her body slightly limp as his thumbs wiped against her cheeks in a way that was almost soothing if she wasn't so terrified for why he was acting this way, she was so so tired, every moment her energy seemed to be sapped. Was this his plan? Cradle her till she expired, taking her life energy? Maybe he was going to take her body upon her last breath turning her into a puppet to get to the real world. She could only fear more at every passing second.

She could feel the ink starting to crawl up her body, oh god he was going to turn her into a flesh puppet for his data. She didn't even have the energy to struggle.

"You're so tired aren't you? So tired of not being enough for some people, tired of hurting in silence, tired of thinking, tired of existing, tired of hurting because of other people. You just want to stop thinking don't you? Stop worrying, stop hurting. I can make all that go away, empty your mind of all that aching all that anguish, I wouldn't hurt you like he would. "

As she stared up at him his face began to slowly slide off and melt almost before his face fell and splattered black flesh and liquid right onto her face, she gasped in horror choking on the foul ink as it slid down her throat and up her nose and crawled into her eyes, she tries to struggle but her body couldn't move wanting to cough up the black corruption but only choking further as he threw his body backwards to howl in laughter removing his hands from her face as she collapsed from choking and the blackness already wrapped around her legs. He watched her spluttering on the floor on her back, black liquid bubbling up out her mouth as she choked and her eyes turned black, the corruption engulfed her pulling her down into itself with only a few bubbles as the last of her breath was taken. The creature grinned as its form became twisted once more, despising the humanoid guise it needed to use.

He hadn't been lying, he had always been intrigued by that one, she was just so corruptible, pushed to the edge of darkness by those around her every day, they really did all the hard work for him. Once he was through with her well he could have his fun before disposing of the last of the filth known as humanity, but until then he now held a very powerful ace, a Kelpymon and a digidestine corrupt to his whim. It glanced over to a patch of pixelated space, knowing the human world could see him and could only grin as the fear, they were right to be afraid of him. He slashed his claw through it ending the connection, laughing to himself, he shouldn't have been surprised by the lack of help really, May was the link that strengthened the chain, with her gone well all that was left was the coward and the clown, as for his human guise well he had his own better life now, why would he risk it. What a blight on this world. Selfish creatures. Horrid creatures. Oh well. They'll all get what they deserve.

[jclie]

— && guests may mistake me as ( elizabeth olsen ), but really i am ( jolie madison + cis female + she/her ) and my DOB is ( 7/29/1992 ). i am a ( musician ) and would like to stay in suite ( 314 ). i won’t be much of a bother because i am ( driven, audacious, & charismatic ), but i can also be ( perfectionistic, reticent & self-sabotaging ) at times. personally, i like to ( paint, hike, try new recipes & sing karaoke ) when i have the time to relax, and my favorite snack is ( chai sugar cookies ) to have in my suite.

hi everyone! i’m red, and the only excuse i have for this dropping so late is that Work Sucks and has held me up, but i am here and ready to love u all! rlly, what better to do with the remaining bits of summer ( and being awake, tbh ) than join this super cute group and put my intro post together? so yes, here is the 411 on jolie, with a more *~cohesive~* bio and stats page on their way — i am so excited to get to know all of your muses and begin interacting! i promise i do not bite so if you’re feeling brave, pop over in the ims, or, just wait me out, because i’m sure i’ll be appearing in them soon enough :~)

general info

full name: jolie drew madison

nicknames: j, jo, jojo (calling her this is a bit of a death sentence unless you have explicit permission), mads

date of birth: july twenty-ninth, 1992 (27)

zodiac: leo

sexual orientation: bisexual

birthplace: chicago, illinois

occupation: musician

hogwarts house: slytherin

mbti: enfj

suite #: 314

tw: drug use

past

born on a wednesday in chicago, illinois to a set of parents who had a very “informal” relationship to say the least — to make a complicated situation as cut and dry as possible, jolie’s parents were best friends with benefits. her mom wound up pregnant and decided to keep the baby. instead of jumping to some rash decision like getting married solely for the sake of their child, they decided to simply remain friends and split custody in the best way they knew how that didn’t require a mediator in the form of a family court judge. her parents remained close friends (and still are) once jolie was born; custody was weirdly split with jolie spending the majority of her time with her mom. they were an unconventional sort of family but a family nonetheless. dad does something with numbers (yes, think chandler bing), and mom is a local business owner.

as a kid, jolie never knew a stranger, and therefore had no trouble making friends once she hit school age. she was the kid who never found her niche group or “clique” because her feet were wet in several of them. school was not a miserable time for her. she had her friends, was a solid a/b student. jolie was a big perfectionist though, it not uncommon for her to beat herself up over something incredibly minute and self-sabotaging herself as punishment or because she didn’t know how to adequately process her feelings of anxiousness — she’d procrastinate, cut people off or drive them away, things of that nature.

music was always in her life, but it was a very casual thing in her world, situated on a backburner. it was something that she was able to bond over with her dad more so than her mom; her dad was a massive music junkie, loved sharing his favorite songs with her, bought her her first vinyl player when she was twelve and supplied her with every album under the sun, whether it was one she wanted or one of his favorites or just one he thought she might enjoy. she was in dance classes as a preschooler (this was an epic fail, because not even her rhythm could save her from the generally awkward disaster she is whenever she dances) and took piano lessons in elementary school, but she didn’t love either? she felt very restricted when it came to formal lessons, and almost needed the freedom to explore and learn it on her own terms — she ended up teaching herself guitar on her dad’s guitar on the weekends she spent at his place. there was also the 6 month stint her junior year of high school when she and some friends started a garage band (which jolie represses to a certain degree because the embarrassment it invokes is on another level) but it was mostly just an idea formulated from boredom and was something to pass the time, nothing really serious. 

jolie found herself at a bit of a crossroads after her graduation. most of her friends were off to college but college did not seem like the kind of environment for her. she didn’t know what she wanted to do with herself or her life, but she knew she had to do something. so she pretty much copied and pasted what one of her close friends was doing at the time, decided to go to northwestern and share an apartment with her and pray that something would speak to her along the way. spoiler alert: nothing did. her first year quickly fizzled and faded for her and most of her time was spent going to parties, embracing the social scene, the like. nothing of real educational value.  

she was still fucking around when it came to music; she’d met some people in one of her creative writing classes (the only class that she legitimately finished and enjoyed) and would go to open mic nights or other gigs around town. never meeting a stranger meant jolie was good at networking, making friends with other musicians — the more she spent time immersed in the world, the more she felt compelled towards music. she began writing songs that weren’t just the product of teenage angst (see: that awful high school band), even took a few music classes at northwestern. 

by the time she hit her junior year, she was over classes and was pretty much only taking filler classes still, wasting her money while she bar tended at one of the bars close by. but she’d never felt more creatively charged; she was putting her nose to the grindstone in writing songs, recording songs in her bedroom so she wouldn’t wake up her roommates, playing gigs on her nights off work literally anywhere that would take her, and using those new-er friendships to her advantage. she had gained some local traction but things really didn’t explode until she started posting original songs online and got contacted by a few record labels. jolie was hesitant to sign with anyone but she got one of her friends in pre-law to help her look over contracts and pretend to be her manager and eventually signed. subsequently, she dropped out of college and went to work on the music thing full time.

from 21-23, jolie was pretty much doing nothing but playing festivals and clocking in hours at studios. most of her time was spent on the road and she absolutely loved it  — she loved the music festival atmosphere, loved the crowds, loved meeting other bands and fans. she was pretty much touring on the few songs she had released, covers, and unreleased tracks from a wip, but it worked for her and it worked for the fans. she released her first album, ultraviolet on her 23rd birthday, and hit the road again. 

jolie missed her “college” life with the parties and socialization at her fingertips, so she started elbowing her way into that scene while she was on tour — at first, it wasn’t anything to bat an eye at, but jolie’s limits were very fluid. being on tour was draining and the perfectionist in her would always find something to berate herself about, and getting out of her head was the only way that she felt she could truly enjoy the whirlwind success that was happening to her. the drugs started as a one-time thing, just to try it, and then she was using regularly, and then it got to a point where she couldn’t go more than an hour without a line of coke. the drugs stripped away a lot of what made her jolie and left her with a more miserable, grouchier version of herself where her highs were almost normal and likable and the lows were hell to be around. 

she came off of ultraviolet’s tour and essentially jumped right back into the studio (she was beginning to break through in mainstream music, with her last promotional single off ultraviolet hitting mainstream radio and doing fairly well) for album #2. it was finished and ready to go, but by that point, the drug use had gotten to an all-time high and the constant turning a blind eye to it from her team was no longer possible. she ended up od’ing and that was it  — there was an intervention in the hospital room, and it was off to rehab for jolie. album got postponed and she basically fell off the radar.

she didn’t really make a “comeback” until she was knocking on 26′s doorstep, and by that point she’d been in rehab, getting sober, and then laying low for nearly two years. by the time she was releasing her first single for the new album cycle, she’d all but scrapped the record she’d made before rehab and had something else put together entirely. she released wonderland, which did very, very well. she toured for it and it was wildly different than anything she’d done prior — venues were bigger, more fans, just a whole different circus all around. 

probably the one thing she was more proud of than the music was her sobriety, and going on two years of being sober, not much else was important to her. she knew had a pretty black and white view of was good for her and what wasn’t, so after the tour wrapped, she decided to come home. she never pegged herself for the type to get “homesick” because her spirit was very much the wandering type, but she knew she needed to get out of la and nyc. back to chicago it was — which is how we get to the malnati. 

present

she’s in what she’d aptly describe as “professional limbo” — she’s not actively working on any one project, she’s just kind of floating until she can find something to tether herself to, whether it’s a single song or an album or something else that appears on her radar. she’s just taking things easy for the time being.

career wise, think marina, l*na —  more of a cult favorite than a mainstream artist. not going to get mobbed when she goes out and about, able to fly under the radar for the most part. as far as her music goes, i don’t necessarily know if i’ll claim any one artist’s discography and adopt as her own; in my head, jolie’s alt pop. think somewhere along the lines of hayley williams, st. vincent, tove lo, splash of the 1975.

personality wise at this point in her life: will charm the pants off of just about anyone she comes into contact with. flirty. a little goofy, hella sarcastic. there’s method to her madness even if no one else gets it. is still a little guarded when it comes to talking about herself. doesn’t mind talking about what’s happened to her but when it comes to the feelings and emotions as to why those things happened, she shuts down. it’s why she’s a musician: why talk about your feelings when you could just write them into a song and pretend they don’t exist beyond that, lmao. is the passive aggressive type, bottles things up and simmers. 

being in the kitchen and cooking has been a tactile sort of therapy for her, especially in her hiatus years. she loves trying new recipes, baking at random (all) hours, sometimes likes to pretend she’s on an episode of master chef. she’s a dork, your honor.

has a thing for polaroids. she has a blank moleskine notebook that she has put through a total ringer, gluing polaroids and other little mementos onto pages as a journal of sorts.

has a stick and poke tattoo (among other professional ones) on her ribcage that she gave herself when she was sixteen. it’s a tiny smiley face. 

her middle name came from her dad’s middle name (andrew).

if you want someone to go out with you at night (or during the day, she’s not picky) and just aimlessly wander around the city, letting things find you, she’s your girl. she loves a good adventure.

i headcanon jolie as predominantly dirty blonde/brunette lizzie? but she is also the type who has ruined her hair over the years over all the impromptu dying so... welcome to close your eyes and pretend hour.

plot ideas

this is by no means a comprehensive list of plots, just stuff off the top of my head that i’d like to see? again, i promise i don’t bite, so pls hmu if one of these appeals to you or if you just wanna brainstorm, i live for that shit!!

jolie’s a chicago native, went to college here, so 👀

meredith to her cristina — basically her best friend (not gender specific, either) who tells it to jolie like it is, doesn’t mind if she laments about how the world sucks every now and again, the person she’s calling if she needs help with a body

physically and/or emotionally, somebody who checks in on jolie and that she checks in on as well. we love a solid support system

exes — jolie’s a little bit (a lot of bit) of a player?? so i’d love to see exes that maybe didn’t end too hot, ex fwb or ex flings that never made it official, people she ghosted, exes that don’t want to get back together but don’t like seeing each other with anyone else, anything under that sun

jolie also is a Lowkey (read: highkey) commitment-phobe, but i’d rlly love for her to maybe have an ex that she was so In Love with that she was willing to push through it bc she saw herself with them forever..... and then, for reasons tbd, it ended, and it absolutely crushed jolie

someone who, on the occasion of needing to scratch an itch, is very good about getting the job done. it’s casual sex. there are zero romantic feelings involved, there is no getting jealous when the other person finds a relationship, the two are just good friends who have seen (and will probably continue to see) each other naked #yeehaw

maybe someone who was at one of jolie’s gigs when she was still playing bars that she bought a drink and kept in touch with or smth? or someone she met when she was still predominately playing small sets at festivals? idk i’m rambling someone stop me

a “muse”??? like, someone jolie is fascinated with / inspired by and she finds herself writing songs about / for

gimme someone who’s like an acquaintance at best, they’ve maybe got mutual friends and therefore they hang out a bit but they’re always arguing with one another for whatever reason (they both probably annoy each other) but they’ve got mad sexual tension going on? maybe they act on it, maybe they don’t, but either way, they lowkey enjoy the bantering and being at one another’s throats even if they act otherwise

jolie is a night owl, so... gimme someone who she can turn up at their room at some unholy hour (or that turns up at her room at said unholy hour) and watch a movie with or make a mess of the kitchen from fixing a premature breakfast

maybe someone who knew jolie when she was not in a good place?? and things are still v much tense / unresolved between them for whatever reason

and stuff for the event omg PLS *makes grabby hands*

[skyking91-archive]

the fallout || skam

Discord thread featuring: Sky & @samuelburton

When: October 24, 2020 - after the halloween party

Where: sam’s apartment

mentions: @ellicfm

Description: sky and sam fight, then they agree to take a break

Trigger Warnings: brief mentions of past trauma, arguing, feeeeels

Sky

Admittedly, sky was a little drunk. She had to be when she was around mat. Like. Damn. She was thankful thought that the Uber dropped her and Mat off at different places. The last thing she wanted to do was spend any more time with him. And he seemed a bit off after the party was over anyway. She hopped out of the car when it arrived at her boyfriend’s place and she went right up, opening the door with the key he’d given her not that long ago. “Hi baby.” She spoke like she had had the longest day at work. She had been thinking about the conversation she’d had with Sam all damn night and had a really hard time enjoying herself. The corn maze with Jess was definitely the highlight of her night though. Still, she couldn’t get same off of her mind.

Sam

sam had stayed at the party longer than he’d intended and while he’d thought ditching would be a good idea, sitting alone with his thoughts while he waited for his girlfriend arrive hadn’t worked out all that well either. especially after that conversation he’d had with ellie about what sam deserved in a relationship. it was a relief to be pulled from his thoughts when he heard a key turn in the door. “hey love,” he smiled tiredly at her. he was genuinely excited to see her but he was also exhausted and the unopened bottle of whiskey beside him hadn’t helped matters. he’d managed to stay relatively sober the entirety of the party but as soon as he was home and didn’t have to worry about out his girlfriend and her fake boyfriend’s pretend relationship, he’d felt free to indulge.

Sky

Sky found Sam sitting on the couch. He seemed relatively comfortable; like he had been there for a while. He looked sad, but just his presence alone made Sky smile. She sat her bag down and took her shoes off before she walked over to find Sam next to a bottle of whiskey. This...didn’t look good. The actress straddled her partner before sitting down on his lap, rubbing his tense shoulders out. Something was off. And it was more than just the conversation that they had had in the kitchen. “I’m really sorry about earlier. I know this sucks...” her dark eyes dropped as she spoke. “I’m sorry we couldn’t go together.” She said with a sigh.

Sam

sam’s hands landed on sky’s thighs as she sat in his lap. he closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the couch, relaxing as her hands went to work on his shoulders. it was a comfort to have her home in his arms again, especially after things had been so tense earlier that evening. still, he couldn’t shake ellie’s words from earlier. “s’okay,” he shrugged lightly, eyes still closed. “it’s all part of the agreement, right?”

Sky

Sky wasn’t totally sure how to respond  to that. Was he being sarcastic or...? Sky furrowed her brow in response and dropped her hands from his shoulders. “Im sorry...” she apologized again, looking away from him. Her heart sank. “Sam...I don’t know what you want me to do. I don’t want you to be miserable jn this. I know you wanna take me out with you, and like...post pictures and stuff. Just...tell people about us.” She didn’t even know where she was going with that but it was something that had been in her mind for a while. She’d try to make up for it with presents, but that only went so far.

Sam

sam opened his eyes, his heart sinking a little when he saw the sad look on her face. he didn’t like making her feel that way. but this was a conversation that needed to be had or else they’d keep circling back round to this same shitty feeling. with ellie’s words fresh in his mind he looked at her questioningly. “can i ask... why are you doing this? because i thought i knew but i don’t really think that i do anymore.”

Sky

Sky was just now realizing how drunk she was when she felt like she was going to start crying. Fuck. She tried to hold it in, but she knew she wouldn’t be able to for very long if this conversation was headed where she thought it was. She rolled over his lap and leaned her head against the back of the couch and huffed, racking her brain for an answer to his question. Why was it so hard for her to come up with an answer that didn’t make her sound like a self centered bitch. “It’s my job.” She finally said after a few moments of silence. “I...it’ll really help me with my career. This’ll open a lot of doors for me.” What a self centered bitch. Still. It was true.

Sam

sam nodded slowly, listening as she spoke. he hadn’t been far off. “i guess i just feel like... i mean you’re so talented, love,” he told her, turning his body to face her on the couch. “i mean really, you’re brilliant. and i don’t understand why you feel that you need to do this to further your career.” sure it would get her a lot more exposure a whole lot quicker. but was it not more rewarding to come by it organically? sam truly thought she was talented enough to make it on her own.

Sky

“You don’t get it.” She said immediately, without really thinking about it. “It’s not just talent that gets you famous and successful. You have to have the right connections, the right exposure.” She stood up and huffed, pressing her hand to her forehead in frustration. She paced slowly because now she was getting frustrated. “Thank you, but there are a lot of talented people in the world and only a select few can actually make it.” Now she felt like she was lecturing him, which she didn’t do it on purpose — she was just so frustrated. “What do you want from me, baby?” She sighed.

Sam

sam knew that it took an awful lot of luck to break into the business. he wasn’t so naive to think that all you needed to have was talent and ambition to make it. it also took a lot of luck. if it hadn’t been for eevee’s wealth and connections, he doubted that the band would have made anything of themselves, as short lived as that was. but was it really worth all of this? we’re there not other ways to go about building status and gaining exposure? but her final question to him had sam furrowing his brow in hurt confusion. “i guess i just hoped that this was enough,” he said, gesturing between them, his own frustration as the situation creeping into his voice. “you are all i want, and i feel like i can’t even have that. at least not all of you. not the way i want.”

Sky

What Sam said next make her heart ache. They had agreed to this. Sure. But it was turning out to be much harder than what they had originally thought. Sky hated Mat. Sure, he was a dick. But she hated looking at him and knowing that he was the one keeping her and Sam from being happy together. Or was she the one that was doing that? “Sam...” she sat down next to him again. “I’m sorry. I want to be the one that makes you feel happy and loved. But...can I ask where this is coming from? Was it just what happened tonight with us? Or is there something else?” Sky empathized with how he felt, she tried to at least, but she still wasn’t sure where this was all coming from. “Please talk to me.” She begged, grabbing his hand with both of hers.

Sam

sam hesitated, looking away from her but allowing her to take his hand in hers. "i guess it started in the dining room," he began. "what mat said- it got to me. and i was starting to have doubts, not about us but about... i mean we really should have thought this through... and then i ran into ellie and we got to talking about what i deserve and i can't help but wonder..." sam's blue eyes met sky's. there was an apprehension there, like he was afraid that what he was about to say would change things between them, though he wasn't sure how. "am i not enough for you?"

Sky

She looked away from him, her heart skipping a beat once their eyes met. Sky took a sharp breath in at the mention of his ex. So that’s where all of this was coming from. What a fucking bitch. How dare she try to sabotage her relationship like that. But also why was Sam talking to his ex about their relationship. “Why the fuck were you talking to Ellie fucking Robertson about our relationship?” She deflected, standing up in a huff. “Sam, I love you. This is just a damn job. You are endgame. This job is not.” She said, pointing to Sam.

Sam

anytime sam mentioned ellie in the past to sky he’d gotten little short responses like “i like ellie” or some other noncommittal comment. while he didn’t expect the two to be best friends he definitely didn’t expect sky to be so pissed about sam talking to her. “what..?” he asked, kind of taken aback by her response. “she’s my friend, sky. one of the only friends i have left and the only other person in my life aside from my aunt who knows what the fuck is going on,” he said, standing as well. “if i can’t talk to her about us who am i supposed to talk to? nobody knows about us. and you know what?” sam asked, eyes growing dark with anger. “i think a lot of the things she was saying made a whole lot of sense.” he huffed at her response about the job, having a difficult time not rolling his eyes at her. “if this is just a damn job, why were you so desperate to take it? the day i come to you to talk, to see if we can get past what separated us in the first place, you tell me you want to take on another job! but i was so...” sam gritted his teeth, taking a hand through his hair as he tried to collect himself. he was having little success. “i was so stupid! so desperate to hold on to you that i said yes! only for this to happen,” he said, gesturing wildly around them. “and we’re right back to where we were the first time around.”

Sky

Sky was a big drama queen, so as one can imagine her reaction to what he was saying may have been a bit over the top. But sky was hurt. Mostly because she know that Sam was right. She hadn’t been fair to him, and he did deserve better but sky wasn’t ready to admit that even to herself. When Sky decided to take the job, she had no idea how hard it would be on him. On their relationship. Sky looked like a hurt puppy as he spoke, then let some silence fall over them for only a brief moment. “I...” she stuttered. “Why did you say something? Why didn’t you tell me not to take it? Why did you wait until you got pissed to say something? You wait til things blow up before you actually say something. You’re right. Now here we are. Back to where we started.” She huffed, trying to hold back those damn tears but the spilled over her eyes and down her cheeks. “What do you want me to do, Sam? I can’t lose you.”

Sam

sam’s jaw set and he gave her a long look. the anger had mostly faded into sadness because he really hated seeing her like this and he hated even more that he’d been the cause. “i wanted to be better. i wanted us to be better. and after losing eevee like that i-“ he looked down at his feet, heart heavy in his chest. “i couldn’t lose you sky. i would have said anything to be with you. i love you.” he looked up at her, his eyes pleading. he didn’t know how to fix this but he so desperately wanted to. his heart clenched at the sight of her tears and he wanted more than anything to take her into his arms and hold her. but he knew it would only make this harder. “you can’t quit... not now, not after signing a contract. i’d never ask you to do that. but maybe...” he sighed, feeling his own eyes prickle with the beginnings of tears. “maybe we should take some time?” he hadn’t meant it to come out like a question. but the words coming out at all had already been a struggle. and he knew that he had drink in him and that emotions were running high... but it was hard to see another solution.

Sky

That was it. That’s when sky absolutely lost it. Her stomach actually hurt and she felt like she was going to vomit. This wasn’t happening. He was right. She couldn’t quit. She’d be breaching her contract and she’s be our hundreds of thousands of dollars. As much as she wanted people to believe it, Sky wasn’t rich and there was no way she’d be able to pay that. She sat down across the room from him, looking anywhere else but in his eyes as she reminded herself to breathe. “You-you’re...breaking up with me?” The words coming out her mouth didn’t even seem real, and — fuck — they hurt so much. Sky loved Sam more than she had loved anyone in her entire life, and sky didn’t always know what to express that. Damn trauma. She cried into her hands for a significant amount of time, before wiping the tears off of her swollen face. She wanted to protest, fight for him...but she also wanted to save at least some of her dignity. “I don’t know what to say, Sam...I love you. I...don’t want this. But I also hate what this is doing to you...” she admitted. Sam really had gotten the short end of the stick in this agreement, and it wasn’t fair of her to ask him to suffer in silence for her sake. “Will it make you happier? If we take a break?” She rasped.

Sam

fuck. as soon as he’d said it he wanted to take it back for this very reason. but he knew that this was probably the best for the both of them or else they might make themselves so miserable that it wasn’t worth the fight. sam didn’t want to believe that was true but with each passing day it was getting harder and harder to cope. he crossed the room and knelt beside her, hesitant at first, though eventually he put a hand on her knee. “hey,” he said to her, his voice a small whisper. “don’t think of it like that. i love you so much, sky and i want to be with you. you make me so happy. but this...? this isn’t good for either of us. i mean look at us.” he was quiet for a moment. “how much longer until the deal is done..?” the last time sam had asked the question sky had told him it could take a year’s time. that seemed excruciating but sam knew that he loved sky so much that he could wait. “once this is over and done... maybe then we’ll really give it a fair chance.” this was probably one of if not the hardest thing sam had ever done. he was so used to people in his life leaving him and here he was, letting go of the thing that made him the happiest.

Sky

"A...A few more months." It didn't seem like that long, but she didn't want Sam to feel like this a minute longer. Sky hated that she ever made the love of her life feel that way. Had she really been so self centered that she didn't stop for a moment to think about what this was doing to Sam? She tried to covered it up with gifts and pretty words, but that only went so far. "I'm sorry...I'm sorry." She said between breaths. "Th-this is all my fault." Even though, realistically, they both agreed to this without really thinking twice about it. They were just so eager to call each other theirs again that they didn't think about the logistics of all this. She finally took her head out of her hands and looked up at him. "I love you so much." She did. She really did. Even though she had a real shit way of expressing it. No one, except Sam, had ever taught her how to love so she was really just winging this.

Sam

sam couldn’t hold back any longer. he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her in close, closing his eyes as he nuzzled her head with his cheek. “hey, none of that now...” though it had been good to get everything out there, he regretted being so harsh with his words. he cared about her so much. “we both agreed to this, yeah? a few more months isn’t bad at all. i’ll be working, you’ll be working, and before you know it i’ll be cheering you on at opening night for rent, okay?” and then hopefully things would be right between them and they could finally be happy with no conditions. “i love you too. so so much.”

Sky

Sky sobbed into his shoulder, probably getting his shirt all gross and snotty but she couldn't seem to find the energy to care about that now. "o...kay." she sobbed, her breath hitching. She hated this. She hated Mat. She hated Ellie. And there was a large part of her that hated herself for letting things get this out of control. She regretted ever taking that damn job in the first place. They stayed in that embraced for a while. It seemed like neither of them wanted to be the first to let go. At least that was Sky's interpretation of it. If they let go, then that meant that this was really over.

Sam

sam held her close to him, rubbing her back soothingly as he tried to calm her down. this all really sucked but sam wanted sky to know that this wasn’t goodbye. he quietly began humming her the melody of the song he’d written for her. he’d hoped the gesture would be both comforting and reassuring though he managed to bring himself to tears in the process. once he’d finished, he planted a small kiss to the top of her head before pulling away to look at her. he wiped away a few of her stray tears and smiled sadly at her. “this isn’t over for us, yeah?” and he held out his pinky to her. “you and me forever. promise.”

Sky

It was probably impossible for Sky to stay mad at Sam for long. Especially when he hummed to her like that, held her like that. It seemed he was always her rock - he'd held her like this and hummed to her while they were in the hospital waiting to see Eevee. Sam cared about other people more than he cared about himself. He also didn't see his worth, and Sky knew that she had done a bad job of helping him see it. Sky was fucking blessed to be loved by him, and even though that it may have been over for them now, Sky wasn't going to stop fighting for him. He deserved that much.