#Fishgills OCs

[nebulousfishgills]

Reading Emily's saga from HTM to Necrosis (plus Instinct and finishing with Shades of Blue) to @bowersbubbles has been a very rewarding experience, getting real time feedback while I make her laugh, lose her shit, and cry while I swallow mucus by the mouthful since my nose has Issues.

Apologies to my much beloved roommate for having to vaguely hear me reading out loud into the 1 or even 2 AM.

[hawxrthia]

intro

THE BASICS

Name : hawx (hawks) or hawxrthia (haworthia)

age: 15

prns: She/Her

ethnicity: Mexican

ABT ME!

hello! as you can see about my blog, i really love art and anime! some of my favorite animes/series include:

Delicious in Dungeon

Naruto Shippuden

Skip and Loafer

Scott Pilgrim TO/VTW

i really like video games, too! my favorite games are Splatoon and Fortnite! i have almost 800 hours on Splatoon 3 lol

my favorite artists/bands are:

Mitski (in Mitski we trust)

Nirvana

Deftones

Tally Hall

The Smiths

i am very aware of the fact my music taste is basic lol, but honestly i just really like these guys! music means a lot to me, so when i share my favorite artists it makes me really happy!

i’m currently in highschool (sophomore) and i’m hoping to go to college for art, specifically to become a storyboard artist or a character designer. most of my OCs aren’t all that well designed, but i’m hoping to get better! ^v^

WHAT TO EXPECT IN MY BLOG?

the most common thing i post is art! majority of it is Fanart of the shows listed above, but i also do OC art! i also repost a TON all the time. watch out for that lol

BOUNDARIES!

no overly sexual comments under my posts please! i am aware i’ll reblog some things that aren’t exactly SFW, but at this point reblogging is a 2nd nature to me.

OTHER THINGS?

Artfight

Toyhouse (pretty empty tbh)

thx for reading!!!

[credits below]

dividers by @/strangergraphics

blinkies by @/frop-slop, @/fishgills,

@/bananaman-mp3

[nebulousfishgills]

I recently extended Emily's transformation scene in Diplopia since when I originally wrote it I hadn't read Breaking Dawn or Life and Death to understand how transformation works in this universe (which I have since done) and figured I'd just post it here as well for funsies since I'm actually quite proud of it.

(Tagging @practically-an-x-man since I think you'll be interested)

Emily felt a sharp pain in her neck as she felt Caius' teeth sink into her skin. She seethed, feeling her blood trickle down the length of her neck. Caius let go, pulling back to show his lips stained with her blood. Emily only had a second to process it before she felt a clear burning sensation in her neck. At the moment, it wasn't as bad as she remembered getting struck by lightning had been, but it still hurt.

It got worse the more it spread, slowly and agonizingly, but Emily didn't dare scream in pain if she could help it. She sucked in rapid breaths through her teeth while letting out the occasional gutteral groan from the back of her throat. Once her body started rapidly twitching, the edges of her vision started to black out. Emily's lip quivered as Caius held her close, almost protective.

"It hurts..." She groaned, the only thing she would allow herself to say. The burning pain only grew worse, Emily shrieked through gritted teeth. Caius soothingly shushed her, dragging his fingers through her hair.

"I know, agapé. It's okay. Just let it happen." Caius said to her. He laid Emily back on the bed as she started seizing up. By now the pain was blinding, but Emily still refused to scream. She refused to show weakness, not even here.

The burn only continued to spread, reaching her arms and chest before long. Fire was a source of comfort for her, but now it felt like she was being roasted alive, tossed into a bonfire carelessly. The imaginary flames licked at her, melting her from the inside out. Was her hair even still attached? If her whole body was on fire, surely her hair was being singed off in the process.

Not my hair. I can't lose it again. Henry loves my hair.

Finally a loud, gutteral scream tore itself from her throat once the burn had reached her toes, her heart beating hard and fast as if to fight against the war within her body. Beating, bravely beating to resist the burn. Her last line of defense. But it ached, if not from the fight but from the hurt she'd felt before. Yearning for Caius to make the pain stop, for Henry to hold her, assure her that it would be okay. Keep fighting. It hurts, but you can't give up. You're strong, you'll endure this. You'll be okay.

It sounded like something he could have said many times in their past. The lab, the fall into the void... or maybe the voice she was imagining came from Caius right next to her, encouraging her to hold on. Suddenly she couldn't tell which was which. Reality seemed to blend with imagination, time seemed to slow and speed up all at once. Her eyes were open, then closed, then opened again, but it was dark either way. She thought she saw red, but it could also have been her mind imagining the flames that danced around her body. Consumed her.

How long had passed? Minutes? Seconds? Maybe even hours? She couldn't tell. Emily felt her body moving here and there, although she couldn't tell if someone was moving her or if she was spasming alone.

Maybe death wouldn't be so bad. Wasn't death supposed to be cold and dark? She craved the cold, whatever to soothe the burn.

I thought becoming a vampire was supposed to be an escape from my pain and fear, my way to finally feel peace. If this is peace, I don't want it. Just let me go home, please, I just wanna wake up and be home. Am I awake or asleep? Maybe I'm dying. It feels like I'm dying. Death sounds nice right about now. It's cold, probably peaceful. That's what Henry wanted for me, right? Peace? A nice, comfortable absence sounds wonderful.

Emily had no way of telling how much time had passed or was passing. Minutes felt like years, days felt like seconds. She heard voices through the burn, the fog, although they could have belonged to people or just risen up from her imagination.

Isn't she beautiful? She'll only get better. I didn't think it was possible for her to look even more beautiful. She's everything we'd hoped she'd be... I just wish you were here to see it.

You're so beautiful... We're going to change the world, just the two of us...

She's almost done, I think.

A perfect specimen. No doubt her strength will have grown... Alas, we have to leave her for now. I need you for something.

A specimen? She thought. No, I'm not a specimen. I'm a person. I stopped being a specimen ages ago.

Could you have used a more revolting descriptor? And no, you can surely handle it yourself. I don't want to leave her.

I need you for it, but if she wakes, you can come back.

Fine. I'll be right back, my love. You're being so brave... so strong... I love you.

Maybe it was seconds later, maybe an hour, but the burn, that horrible burn started to fade. She could feel her toes, her fingers. It was like she'd dipped them into an ice bath. Sweet relief that spread to her hands and feet. Slowly... although her heart, her poor brave heart only got hotter, beat faster. The very fires of hell descended upon her chest, only getting worse the more time passed.

Emily could feel her face cooling off, slight stretches of her skin as it almost reformed around her features. A tingle ran up and down her right half, dancing across where her scars should be. Things were shifting, or perhaps finishing their changes. Her heart beat faster and faster, growing hotter and hotter.

Feeling returned to her arms and legs. Her limbs and digits twitched experimentally, the movement felt refreshing. And smooth. Her torso cooled off, only left with her heart, beating faster than should be possible, hotter than all the other heat had been. Emily couldn't even scream, she just gasped for air that wouldn't come. She lurched, groaning before falling back.

Finally, finally, the burn faded. She would have thought death finally had claimed her had her awareness told her otherwise. Then, after a hard fought battle, her heart gave three final strong beats, Thor's last steps after defeating Jörmungandr. It's earned a nice rest.

Her heart and body finally stilled, allowing herself to sit in a perfect, burn free bliss.

[nebulousfishgills]

The joke kinda writes itself, methinks

[nebulousfishgills]

"Ah yes, me, my wife, and a body pillow of the man she's cheating on me with"

[nebulousfishgills]

I had hoped that I'd be able to post this after the campaign/run was completed, but stupidly perhaps I decided to call it a night right in the final stretch of the game on Wednesday night and Patch 7 dropped that next morning. Given that my mods are currently largely inaccessible until they update and I can get my mod manager back up and running, I'll just post this now and update it if/when I get my stuff back.

The source of my joy for the past week or so has been using that Alicent face preset I posted about a while ago, and boys...

I'm so serious when I say this is probably the closest I'll ever get to seeing Emily with her own face running around doing Emily-Accurate things. The sheer and total glee I got from doing this run was like pure dopamine running through me.

Like LOOK AT MY GORGEOUS, BELOVED GIRL

And, of course, it made these moments ten times better, too.

I can never really settle on one hair preset that works for Caius because I think a lot of them do, but the fact that Henry's hair was one I didn't even mod in and was just perfect makes it even better. Again, the white doublet and black belt was me having a giggle. Plus those necklaces in Basket Full of Equipment are about as close as I'll get to the Volturi pendants and I think it just ties everything together.

I'm at the mercy of mod makers (All the love and joys to them, honestly, I hope every mod maker's pillows are cold on both sides and that their skin clears for the service they do) and mantiiiss my beloved you've done me a great service, you COOKED with that Alicent preset (no pun intended). I may be a little bit impatient about you updating your masterpieces for Patch 7 but please, take all the time you need, we love you dearly.

Although I will say that if/when some dear, amazing soul creates a face preset for Jamie, it is absolutely OVER for you bitches, I'll become too powerful. Cause homie, this isn't exact by any stretch, but even when it's close, it looks pretty good.

Of course, I realized WAY too late into this run that in order to reach my peak game experience (face presets aside), I need to mod Gale to look like Eddie and then multiclass him into a bard. The sheer power would be astronomical... so I guess I have to do another run with Emily oh nooooo....

[nebulousfishgills]

💔🍷💄🐞🧣🎒 for Emily please?

Random OC ask game drop because it's 1:30 AM (when I started this one) and brain doesn't wanna sleep, so here we go.

💔 - Who has your character hurt most? Physically or emotionally? How did it feel? Do they regret it?

Ooh, that's actually a hard one because, as we know, Emily is Not A Good Person and has left many broken people in her wake, literally.

I suppose the obvious answer would be Eleven since she and Henry have been tormenting her for years at this point. She bore witness to their massacre and then the seven or so years after that involved sending out Demogorgons to find her (maybe), using the Mind Flayer to infect and hurt her friends while trying to locate and snatch her, arguably it's their fault she thought Hopper died, and then doing things like taking Max away and breaking Hawkins. It's a hefty list and most of the motivation is being bitter and petty over the fact that an abused eight year old child saw all her companions slaughtered and didn't immediately run to their arms.

But somehow, some way, I think at least some part of Emily feels bad about it. The canonicity of her being their daughter is still up in the air at this point, but that doesn't even necessarily have to factor into it. They may be rivals now, but for a while, Emily was the closest thing Eleven had to a mother figure in Hawkins Lab, arguably the only other one she's had aside from Joyce. Emily's perception of her mother is extremely poor, so in my mind, there's that small part of her that feels bad for hurting this daughter/daughter figure of hers when she knows she's still haunted by what her own mother did. And abandoning Emily because she couldn't take care of her is way further down on the severity scale.

So, I think Eleven might take that spot, with Eddie being a runner up since it's Emily's fault he had to go on the run and ultimately get killed, let alone lobbing the betrayal aspect onto it. And that's including me factoring in her Twilight era since that's actively her being a better person and not hurting people like that. I suppose you could throw Aro onto that list since in the span of like, a day, she seized control of his empire and killed him because she got cockblocked one too many times.

🍷- Does your OC drink? What kind of alcohol do they enjoy? What are their drinking habits? What kind of drunk are they?

Okay, so Emily canonically avoids substances that impair her. Drugs, alcohol, the like. It's less so because she hates the tipsy/high feeling and moreso because those things scramble her brain and disconnect her from her abilities. She's very reliant on them both as a tool for defense/attack/what have you, but just as a general crutch. It's well within reason to assume that without access to her powers, she feels weak or even helpless.

Not to say she's soley dependent upon them, of course, I think being friends with Eddie Munson alone means she can land a punch and some rougher treatment, but she sees losing access to her powers as like being disarmed. She can still hold her own, but it's way easier for her to just use her abilities.

And discounting the telekinesis and crushing people's bones aspect, her powers are how she can feel Henry's presence even from dimensions away and vice versa. It's like having a waypoint, a little emotional guide, and if her brain is scrambled, she can't access that either.

But I'll bite and pose a hypothetical. Honestly, I could see Emily being multiple kinds of drunk. Angry drunk comes to mind immediately, but I could just as easily see her blubbering and slurring all of her woes on the sofa while wasted. Maybe she can be flirtatious depending on her mood. Drunk Emily would start a fight, cry about being abandoned by her mother, and then try to climb Henry like a tree in the span of about ten minutes.

💄- What does your OC think of their face? Do they have a positive or negative opinion? Do they wear makeup? Do they have a skincare routine? What traits do they like most about their face?

In all honesty I think Emily has mixed feelings about her face, especially once she gets her scars. Because on one hand, they make her stand out and look freakish, but on the other I think she likes the intimidation it brings

I honestly don't think she thinks about it all that much unless she's in public. She knows the damage could have been ten times worse since she watched Henry decay in real time. I don't think she hates her scars themselves, and moreso hates the attention they bring since she prefers to Not Be Perceived by Hawkins since she's basically being covert to spy on The Party.

But at the end of the day, she really only cares about her opinion and Henry's, and he has not a single bad thing to say about her. And honestly, I think any skincare routine she'd do would amount to just water and whatever shampoo trickles down with it. Maybe a lotion if a dry patch is bothering her. She just would not understand the need to go so far for your skin since, to her, most beauty routines and standards are bullshit and unecessary.

Emily would probably accuse you of, like, speaking in tongues if you said anything about hyaluronic acid or whatever the fuck.

Now, we kind of push against that boundary when we hit makeup because if we take Vampire Emily into account, part of her arc is accepting the fact that she can enjoy feminine things without immediately tying it to pointless social constructs and rejecting it for that.

I'm not someone who wears makeup basically at all save for costumes or just wanting to wear mascara because I think it makes my eyes look more defined, in fact I think I look weirder with it on. A lack of vanity is something I impart on all my characters because that's just not something I care about.

But the crow inside me that likes shiny things loves going into beauty stores for the bright colors. I feel like Emily would be somewhat the same way. That's how Heidi helped Emily open up a bit, like "look at all the fuzzy brushes and bright colors of the eye shadow." Also, again, Heidi telling her that makeup isn't just a conformity or for hiding who you actually are because society says women have to look a certain, perfect way. Sometimes it's just fun to do it for the hell of it.

Also, to her credit, makeup would be hard with how her scars were. Once she turns, the scars fade away and it opens up a better canvas for her.

Ultimately I think Emily's relationship with her face is just "yeah it's there, I don't need to doll it up because it doesn't matter and also my boyfriend (whichever one) still thinks I look hot either way, so suck it."

🐞 - What does a perfect day look like for your OC? What do they do? Who do they see?

The fact that this question is represented by a ladybug is perfect since that's what Henry's nickname for her is. It ties into my answer to this question, because regardless of who she's partnered up with at the time, Emily's ideal day is just a day where it's just her and Henry/Caius. Nobody else.

In Hawkins especially, she deeply dislikes people so a day where she just doesn't see them is already wonderful. If we add onto that, I think she'd also prefer a day where she doesn't feel burdened or stressed out about anything. She lays in bed with Henry and all she has to worry about is just enjoying his company. Maybe they talk, maybe he reads to her, maybe they sit by a riverbank and let their feet rest in the water. Just a genuinely unburdened day with Henry, imagining what their human free utopia would be like.

The thing you have to remember is that Emily's a bad person whose actions are rooted in wanting to be free of her pain and just live a peaceful, happy life, something she's been robbed of for nearly forty years. At this point in time, that looks like living alone and in silence with Henry and their abnormalities. She thinks the human system is stopping her from getting that, so it's gotta go.

And, honestly, I'd wager to say her perfect day with Caius looks very very similar. She's still Emily with the same nihilistic worldview, she's just more stable with a wider support system. The thriving after a life of surviving. She's an introvert who can't handle being around people all the time since it's unpredictable and overwhelming. That's a central plank in her snapping in Necrosis and overhauling the whole system. She just couldn't get a moment of peace with Caius because of other people.

So, her ideal day is just having one day of some fucking peace and quiet, but in luxury this time. Maybe a bath, sitting in the gardens, being read to by Caius (being read to is a constant, both because I love it, and also it's that childhood trauma piece, being robbed of bedtime stories, mundane may it be), maybe hunting in the woods if the mood was right... and, you know, banging.

I will omit the references from HotD we got this week.

🧣- What comforts your OC? Is it an item? An action? A person? Whatever it is, how and why does it comfort them?

Emily's unfortunately somebody who has lacked many comforts in her life. Whoever her spouse is at the time is like the one constant comfort in the form of a person. Regardless of where she is in life or who she surrounds herself with, the only true comfort and peace she knows is with her partner. Yeah, she has a certain dependency, but that's just part of her character.

Actions, I've already mentioned being read to, but I'd also say drawing is another one since in Hawkins Lab, that was like, the one thing she was allowed to do that wasn't hyper focused on her abilities, the one way she was able to express herself. I always headcanoned that she carried a sketchbook around with her sometimes that Eddie snooped through a few times. Landscapes (i.e. imagining a beautiful, human free world), the occasional manic Mind Flayer doodle, halfway decent drawings of Henry's face (to remember what it looked like pre-Vecna), and the drawing she did of the Creel House as a child when she first showed up in the lab is taped on the inside cover.

Eddie never questions her about this, of course, he shouldn't have been snooping in the first place. Even if he's unaware of her powers, he's sure she would beat his ass for looking in her stuff.

Another comfort action is playing with her hair/scratching her scalp. This is one of those me-traits that I passed on because that shit is the best feeling in the world to me. It always puts me at ease, and I wanted to give that to Emily.

As far as comfort objects, I couldn't give any that are at the same capacity of the other comforts I listed. The sketchbook, maybe her D&D dice, some clothing item of Henry's/Caius' (in fact it might be one of Caius' scarves), it could be anything. She's not really a materialistic person since she's used to having nothing. Objects don't comfort her in the same way those other things do.

🎒- What items does your OC usually carry? Do they have a bag or just keep everything in their pockets? Do they carry a lot or a little?

Again, Emily has almost nothing to her name. Day to day, she doesn't carry much since most times she's in the Upside-Down and doesn't necessarily have the *need* to carry much. But she does have a bag for her Overworld visits, I usually picture it as a dirty old black backpack with a broken zipper and a hole in one of the small front pockets.

Usually when she goes to the Overworld, she only has a few essential things:

-Sketchbook/pencils/pens

-Anything required for D&D, so like her dice, handbook, character sheet, etc.

-Possibly some kind of pocket knife both as a tool and also for self defense in case it's really not a good idea to use her powers

-Any cash/change she's gotten her hands on.

Other than that, it's just the clothes on her back, I'd say. In Volterra she has even less use for things to always have on her. Although she does feel like someone who'd have occasional stickey note notes in her pockets that she forgets about until months later.

I don't know, it's 3 am now so I'm just gonna call it there.

[nebulousfishgills]

So I got the candles--

[nebulousfishgills]

Apparently Bath and Body Works is doing a second wave of their Stranger Things collection, this time with an emphasis on the Upside Down...

So that means next time I go in, I can get the Upside Down candle and the Vampire Blood halloween candle and-- *gets sniped*

[nebulousfishgills]

Needed something to draw, so.... have an Emily! Hope you like it!

YOOOOO WAIT WHAT OMG SHE'S SO AWESOME LOOKING

I love her so much holy shit thank you!

[nebulousfishgills]

Bad hot takes? Oooof man you know the fandom would be so torn on Emily fr. Half of them would be convinced that she's this babygirl character and utterly wash away all her villainy just because she's pretty, and the other half would swing SO hard the other way and turn her into a complete irredeemable villain... and they'd still call her a girlboss for it. They'd probably also claim that Keira was somehow emotionally abused or manipulated (or TikTok's favorite term, gaslit) for taking the Goblin serum alongside Norman, instead of it being her choice and her passion project too.

In general I feel like your characters would fall into that "girlboss" trench in the fandom, where they only trait people focus on is their badassery and completely omit all of their deeper character traits and motives.

You're absolutely right is the thing. I spend a lot of time in my head wondering what Emily's fandom impact would be if she was a canon character (typically imagining what her AO3 stats would look like) and I believe both sides of the debate would be prolific. People would be at each other's throats over who is the worse influence, her or Henry, and both sides would be wrong. Saying Henry's the manipulative one washes away how truly shitty of a person she is, and saying she's the manipulative one washes away her nuance.

I also feel like her sexuality would be hotly debated, whether's she's straight, closeted lesbian, bisexual (the correct answer), and then of course the debates over if she's bad representation since she's another "queer coded villain."

I have a really honestly concerning level of thoughts and ideas about her hypothetical fandom influence.

Keira's also an interesting case since theoretically Spider-Man came out in 2002, which is over 20 years ago, so people's media consumption and literacy was different. I feel like she'd be that character that was written off for years before a fandom resurgence takes a second look at her and, as you said, realizes how "abused" and "gaslit" she was, and "oh look how women used to be portrayed in the early 2000s"

Which, yeah, the Raimi Spider-Man movies aren't exactly known for their complex women, Mary Jane being the priiiiiiime example (something I made an effort to fix in my fic). There's a certain internalized fandom misogyny that I think Keira would really serve to highlight. "Women can't be villains or be morally gray" kind of shit, and I feel like Emily would suffer the same treatment.

[nebulousfishgills]

Have I finished my self insert playthrough yet? No.

Am I starting a new game anyways where I'm playing as an Embrace Dark Urge origin Emily? Yes.

[nebulousfishgills]

Ladies and gentlemen, I'm pleased to report that Diplopia has reached 1,000 hits.

[nebulousfishgills]

Behind the scenes for Necrosis please!

1, 6, 7, 11, 17, and 21

Okay let's see here, one essay coming up :)

1) How long did it take you to write this fic?

According to AO3, I published the first chapter on April 20th, 2023 and finished it on October 5th, 2023, so theoretically that's just about 5 and a half months. Of course that doesn't include writing that first chapter and planning it out.

Although, I have planning messages (I wrote my outline on Discord like a Normal Person) that I first wrote on March 29th of that year. So... like six and a half months or so? Give or take?

Damn, when I do the math I'm kind of insane for that.

6) What do you need to write? Is there anything special you need to do/have to help your creative flow?

I have to have some kind of background noise, but that's just a general necessity for me. I can't do complete silence or I can't function. My headphones are going like 70% of the day playing music or whatever.

Writing specifically though, and for Necrosis specifically since that's the focus of the ask, typically it was like, rain/castle/fireplace ambiance. This one was my go-to:

Sometimes I'd also use instrumental tracks/playlists depending on the vibes, or even my Emily playlist (the Twilight one, ofc... god the fact that I need to fucking specify...).

7) What inspired the idea for the plot?

Okay so honestly, with Necrosis I just kinda found the plot along the way.

I knew I wanted to do a sequel to Diplopia of some kind to really give myself a sandbox to play in and see where this story could potentially go. But, eventually I found what I would consider to be my three main plot points, what I would later consider to be the three main arcs or "acts" of the story: Mele and Emily's "unwitting motherhood" arc, the ball and the disaster that befell that, and what I like to call "The People vs. Aro Volturi."

Mele just kind of came to me in a flash of inspiration after scrolling through wikis and looking into Life and Death (genderbent Twilight) and to be honest, all of it kind of stems from that idea. Life and Death has a lot of similar beats in the backstory for the Volturi presented. Sulpicia witnessing Didyme's murder, reporting it, having Mele steal Aro's gift to give it to her before he's executed. Regency ends up two-thirds female, you get the idea. Shipping her with Jane was just me having some fun.

One of my HUGE big brain moments was me deciding to have Athenodora's murder be orchestrated by Aro because he knew that she knew about his sister. In the original story of Diplopia (the full thing, not the very original one shot), I had Athenodora be dead just to cut down on the chaos of the whole situation, but I actually took inspiration from Caius' canon backstory for it. He hates werewolves in canon because he was almost killed by one and is utterly terrified of them. In my version, he hates them because werewolves killed his wife.

The subplot of Necrosis with Emily finding Athenodora's journal and putting the pieces together about what actually happened is still something I'm very proud of because that wasn't the original intention of Athenodora being absent, and I'm also proud that I had Thena's knowledge be somewhat of a mystery as well, so the reader only realizes it once Emily points it out when she's delivering her litigation.

Anyways, that was a tangent for only one plot point.

I chose to have a ball in the middle because I feel like it can be a staple in Volturi fics, and also because I wanted to include some more traditional vampire-type tropes. I wouldn't go as far to call it like a "red herring" part of the fic since it seems like a weird distraction from the main plot...

And this is where I admit that the HARDEST part of planning this fic was figuring out the conflict, and ultimately I landed on another Twilight fic staple: Newborn army conspiracy.

I knew that whatever this conflict was, it was only meant to be a plot device/distraction from the actual conflict of the fic, which was Emily dealing with this forbidden knowledge about what happened to Didyme. But this plot also couldn't be entirely pointless because it had to lead to some type of explosion that lead Emily to announcing this information. It was a lot of complex pinboarding in my head. So, I kinda just landed on Newborn Vampire Army and let that do what it will.

Fun fact about that, if in that first group of newborns caught in chapter 2, one of those vampires seemed a liiiiittle personal (the one Emily executes herself), it's because I based him on my ex. So.

Anyways, naturally the last plot point was the main reason I wrote the whole fic. Didyme and all that backstory is an aspect of the Twilight lore that fascinates me because it's genuinely interesting, yet never mentioned or expanded upon and I LOVE fics that deal with it.

I had to leave little breadcrumbs leading up to it, and I even foreshadowed it in Diplopia when I had Emily tell Sulpicia that she was sure "someone [t]here has sororicide on their conscience." Which seems like a highly specific and odd detail unless You Know.

Necrosis was all about showing some growth for Emily. She's been in Survival Mode for most of her life, and now that she's comfortable, she can enter that Growth Stage of living. Diplopia wasn't about character development, at its core it was about me being silly. Necrosis' entire thesis is basically me flipping a fat bird to Stephenie Meyer's dumb and hypocritical tidbit about vampires being static beings incapable of developing. Emily has the ability to care about others and for the greater good, she just was never in a position to try.

Those three plot points kind of showcase those developmental phases. Caring for and helping Mele learn and grow (theoretically this parallels Eleven), letting herself be frivolous and enjoy herself for the hell of it (dressing up all fancy, dancing, this arc even opens with Emily in bed with Heidi to explore her sexuality), and then choosing to act in the interest of the greater good because it was the right thing to do.

So, tl;dr, Necrosis' plot was very complicated to map out because I had the different destinations I wanted, but had to do some work to chart the courses.

11) Was there a scene you hadn't originally planned to include? Why did you decide to fit it in?

To be honest, most of Necrosis happened as I planned it, convoluted as it was. There weren't many outtakes, if any that I can remember. I suppose there were tidbits that I'd debated about including or not before ultimately deciding to add them in anyways. Emily and Heidi being intimate springs to mind as one of these elements because I always had assumed that they had some type of physical relationship, but only really implied or mentioned in passing. I felt bold, though, and just decided "fuck it."

I did this silly doodle a while back using that lesbian eyeshadow meme as a template (it's not very good, be warned) and I've made memes about them having some type of intimate relationship.

Something else that I never did explicitly state but I've headcanoned since basically the veeeeeerry beginning was some type of similar relationship between Emily and Sulpicia, even if it was only like once or twice. Maybe in my mind I think the way it goes is that Heidi was very obviously some type of awakening for Emily and when she's confused by this, she asked Sulpicia what the fuck is going on and Emily basically has to get the "gay urges" talk from Picia. Then, perhaps similar to that bit in Game of Thrones with Daenerys and her handmaiden in the first season, Emily has Picia show her what to do with a woman before she tries to work her almost nonexistent charm on Heidi... tbh this might make for a good one shot.

Emily's the embodiment of repression, and she fell into a coven of actual slut vampires that do whatever they want is what I'm saying.

17) What was the hardest scene to write?

"Hard" can have multiple definitions. If we were to say scenes I was dragging my feet to get through, I'd probably say some of the ball scenes because they just weren't as meaty as I would have liked and I was itching to get to the chaos of the After.

Smut actually got easier overtime because I was practicing in private for little personal projects, but the hard part eventually became a wording issue. I've learned how to get nastier with it, but I know I need to hold myself back in certain regards because a) it's not the focus of the fic and b) not everyone is into hardcore smut. It's a balance that must be hit, but as one of my friends put it, "having to be eloquent about it is like pulling teeth."

Hard emotionally, I'd say that the bit in the last chapter when Emily and Caius are talking about outliving everything and everyone they knew. It was my last chapter and I hadn't intended for it to get that deep at all, but it was 2 AM and my brain just kind of led me down that angst ramble unplanned. Finishing Necrosis was always gonna be emotional for me and that just really hit a certain way. I actually had to stop and finish it in the morning because I had started crying over it.

It was the existentialism and my chronic "Emily Leaving Henry" guilt flaring up with a vengeance.

21) What was something you didn't expect people to notice or gravitate towards in this fic?

Something that was funny to me was how you in particular seemed suspicious of Mele and her actions lmao. I can totally see why, but honestly her quick acceptance of vampirism can be boiled down to three things:

1) In some ways she felt like some type of caricature of people who want to be vampires and would be like "yeah sure fuck it."

2) Plot Reasons/Mating Bond with Jane. Mating bonds/pulls aren't technically even a canon thing, but like eeeeeevery fic uses it to the point that it basically is canon. Another example of this is Caius being a painter. Not technically canon per se, but it's a pretty universally accepted headcanon.

3) I'm lazy. Somethings are just easier to handwave.

Although admittedly Mele being some type of twist villain would 100% be some type of shit I'd pull, so I don't blame people for thinking about it. It honestly hadn't ever crossed my mind because my lizard brain was focused on getting to Emily exposing Aro's secret.

And honestly, Emily trying "Caring for a Supernatural Child 2: Electric Boogaloo" was just such a fun concept.

I wonder if Eleven will ever know that she has several non biological/they're emotionally Emily's children siblings. One of them's also named Jane, how funny.

[nebulousfishgills]

Blorbo bingo for Henry (canon), Emily (yours) and Quinn (mine) please?

Henry

Emily

Quinn

[nebulousfishgills]

Oh are we OC shitposting? Alright then.

Emily: I don't like marriage, it's an archaic institution that's part of this perceived ultimate goal to bind oneself to another person in the eyes of a non-existent god and is designed to keep us from being our natural free selves. Henry and I don't need a piece of paper or a pastor to say we're bound together, we-

Caius: Hi

Emily: