#Getting mine going too idk why I reblogged the poll

[crimsonfacets]

Love how it's moving week for the dash

[tesl8n]

Hi, im the aroace anon from the AITA post you reblogged a couple of days ago. I was looking through the responses on the post and saw you're one of the only people who emphasized with my situation, and since you were confused about why everyone thought I would be the asshole and asked to send asks, I decided to send you an ask. Sorry if this is weird, I was initially going to send a follow-up to the aita blog but their inbox is closed. once it's open maybe I'll modify this ask and send it there too, or maybe not.

I was also really surprised by how the majority of votes were yta and someone even said it's obviously bait. I thought this was a normal thing to do. By dating I didn't mean a serious relationship or getting married. I had the impression that many people date for fun or to maintain appearances. lots of queer people have dated people they were not attracted to because they were not sure about their orientation, or people in general pretending like I said to see if they actually start liking them in that way at some point. Also as an autistic person a lot of my relationships (familial or platonic) involve to some extent pretending to "love" someone in some way even tho idk my own feelings. I thought this is just how it is and most relationships are kinda a performance. if you treat people well why would it matter whether what you say you feel is real?

Maybe my morals are just fucked

Omg, hi anon! Didn't expect to see you in my inbox, welcome, welcome! Lol

Yeah, I remain confused about the ratio on that poll too. Like, I understand and agree with everyone's point about it being better to be upfront about your current feelings. You're less likely to hurt someone else that way, and less likely to get hurt yourself.

But I don't understand how that extends to it being immoral or assholish to not be upfront like that. And you're right that no one seems to be willing to acknowledge that this is similar to things a lot of other flavors of queer people do, both in romantic relationships and, as you say, in other relationships. And while it's not great for any party in those situations... it's also not an immoral act on the part of the individual queer person (moreso on society's part).

But, I guess. If your morals're fucked, then mine are too lol. Or maybe we both just don't understand whatever it is that's really obvious to everyone else on this one. Too bad we don't know each other, we could avoid that whole mess lol