#I AM CAPABLE OF CLIMBING OUT OF THE GODDAM PIT IVE BEEN IN FOR UNIRONICALLY MOST OF MY LIFE
Text
I'm christian now
#THE FINE LINE BETWEEN KNOWLEDGE OF MANIFESTING AND AWARENESS OF THE PRESENCE OF UNHINGED FUCKED UP UNFORTUNATE GENETICS#CURRENTLY I BELIEVE IF I THINK ABOUT IT GETS STRONGER. JANKY OUTPUT. CREATING MY OWN DEMISE#THIS SUCKS FUCKING ASS AND I ALSO HAVE APHANTASIA PRETTY MUCH SO I CAN'T COVER UP THE PATTERNS AND DISTORTED IMAGES OF EVERYTHING I DONT#WANT TO SEE BUT THEY'RE THERE AND FRACTALISED. SOMETIMES I CAN SEE IMAGES SO DISTANT AND BLURRY AND TRANSPARENT OVER THE BLACK BUT RN THEY#JUST DISSOLVE AND THE WEIRD SHIT TAKES OVER#I DON'T KNOW HOW TO HANDLE WHAT FEELS LIKE A 1/4 LOADED EGO DEATH#NOT THAT I'D MIND BUT I'D LIKE TO KEEP MY MEMORIES AND PERSONALITY THANKS#ANYWAY I NEED TO EXERCISE AND EAT FOOD AND STAY AWAY FROM THE VICES AND ENGAGE IN ANYTHING BUT THE DEGENARATE TIME-LEECH THAT IS COMPLACENCY#MOTHERFUCKER#NOT EVERYTHING IS A GODDAMN PATTERN OR SIGN AND YOU NEED TO ABANDON THIS PRETENTIOUS HUBRIS THAT THE ALL IS SOMETHING YOU CAN PUT LABELS ON#DIVINATION IS REAL THOUGH#AGAIN THIS FINE LINE#MAYBE I NEED A NEW HOBBY#NOT EVERYTHING IS A FUCKING SYNCHRONICITY. SOMETIMES EVENTS JUST HAPPEN. I MUST BECOME AWARE THAT I HAVE BEEN DESPARATLEY SEEKING SIGNS THAT#I AM CAPABLE OF CLIMBING OUT OF THE GODDAM PIT IVE BEEN IN FOR UNIRONICALLY MOST OF MY LIFE#AND SHIT IS REACHING A TIPPING POINT AND I ALSO JUST HAVE A GLITCHED IMAGE GENERATING SYSTEM AND THE HORRORS ARE ONLY BEING INTERPRETED#AS THE BEGINNING OF SCHIZOPHRENIA BC IM AFRAID OF IT. AND IM SEARCHING FOR AND SEEING PATTERNS IN EVERYTHING BECAUSE I WANT TO ANALYSE EVERY#SINGLE ATOM OF MYSELF AND MY SURROUNDINGS TO SEE IF I CAN FIGURE OUT JUST WHAT IT IS THAT I'M EXPERIENCING#ALSO ANTIPSYCOTIC MEDS NOW LIKE RN JUST IN CASE#THE RINGING IN YOUR EARS ISNT ANYTHING ITS JUST RINGING#NOT EVERYTHING IS A PATTERN AND EVENTS CAN JUST HAPPEN#AAAAHHH
0 notes
Last Seen Blogs
