#I changed Ammon’s hair to fit Age’s hair more

[smilesrobotlover]

Ammon’s coworker and an idea of him eventually getting a prosthetic thanks to Purah and Robbie.

Orman is a skilled fisherman from Lurelin who is proficient at spear fighting and is good at throwing things lol. He and Ammon are basically best friends lol. He’s a loveable goofball and though he acts stupid he’s a very capable person. He and Ammon work great together, hence why they are partners. I love them.

[simplyoriginalcharacters]

Mikaela Silvina

Age: 30

Gender: Female

Orientation: Unknown (Is comfortable with anyone though)

Nationality: Filipino

Appearance: Mikaela has long waist length hair that she has dyed blue at the tips. Her eye color had changed from a dark brown to a bright amber after the Portal accident. She’s not very tall, around 5"3, but pretty fit as she spent her training on running and improving her speed. She wears crystal bracelets, each crystal turns into a throwing knife when it is needed. She just wears the dress and rose for aesthetic reasons but also likes the feel of the dress as she runs around. The rose can change color to indicate wether she’s healing or damage boosting a teammate. She doesn’t like to wear heavy armor as it is too heavy for her to run around, she dodges enemy attacks instead.

Personality: (Strength = Resilient) + (Weakness = Sensitive) x (Strength > Weakness) =

This girl is one to break easily but worry not, for she will get back up and continue on.

Mikaela is rather prone to overthink and that may be bad for her health. But because of that also, it’s the reason why she can come back up. She knows that she still can and will do it over and over again.

She has these coping mechanisms that she retreats to a lot. She’s a person who isn’t very comfortable hanging around too many people since she’s scared that she’ll get hurt. And because of this, she tends to daydream a lot and is very imaginative. Instead of being around a group of people, she’s rather read her books and write her own stories. She’s considered a Bibliophile, as she’s usually seen reading a book or writing one.

Her attention span isn’t the best either and along with her memory. As Paradox (Overwatch), she hasn’t mastered her abilities yet as it requires the utmost focus and can’t use firearms to save her life.

This girl prefers to be as truthful as she can and may be blunt with her words but means no harm. Unfortunately, most people don’t trust her with secrets.

She may tend to display a lack of attraction or any desire of romantic interaction. She will tend to show slight disgust toward social interaction in general.

Bio (Overwatch Paradox):

Mikaela Silvina was the only child of Ammon and Leticia Silvina, a rich couple who worked very hard during the Omnic Crisis. But in her youth, she felt neglected by her parents and was closer to her aunt and uncle-in-law. She was sheltered during then to keep her safe. She was homeschooled by her aunt and turned out to be rather intelligent with her hyperactive mind. Unfortunately, that caused problems in her later years.

During High school, she didn’t exactly know how to properly interact with people. She used to have many fake friends because of her status. They had her treat them to a lot of things like food, etc. Her aunt had realised what they were doing and told Mikaela. Once she had found out, she felt angry and shut everyone out, making sure that she doesn’t get any more of these fake friends.

Most of her time was spent alone, doing her studies and reading. She took Engineering since her parents wanted to hand down the family business to her. Although, her aunt did teach her some etiquette and all those essentials for when she was required to attend parties with other families that they did business with.

She met a woman named Althea Torres that she had grown very close to and was her best friend, then her girlfriend, and then her wife. They worked together as partners in Silvus Tech and Thea supported Mika’s career in writing. She was able to create international best-selling books that had inspired many people.

Unfortunately, a storm hit and they were both caught up in it. A tree had collided with Mikaela, impaling her heart. Althea found her and immediately brought her to the hospital. She had to get an artificial heart. And, interestingly enough, Dr. Angela Ziegler had been there to offer her a recruitment to Overwatch. They’ve heard of her skill in Engineering.

Mikaela had talked to Althea about this. She had handed Silvus Tech to her, the person she trusts the most (who isn’t her aunt or uncle or cat), and joined Overwatch.

During her Overwatch years, she has continued with her work as an engineer. One day, she created a portal that could rip holes in the fabric of reality. It was inspired by Satya’s Teleporter, but taken to another level. Unfortunately, she had been sucked in the portal and got trapped in a different layer of reality.

After a while, an omnic had to rescue her from the portal once Overwatch realised her absence. The toxins in the layer had affected her DNA and gave her the ability to create portals (3 second cooldown), reverse the way gravity reacts to her body (will continuously float up for 8 seconds/cooldown: 8 seconds), regeneration (like Mercy’s), charming (can heal 3 people close by, only in line of sight), and Reality Warp (Ultimate: freezes enemies in place to take their hp and transfer it to teammates and self, lasts for 4 seconds, enemies can’t be killed during this ult, not invulnerable).

When Overwatch was disbanded, Mikaela found out that Althea died in a car crash. This took a huge impact on Mikaela and her heart was broken (despite not having one anymore). She shut down Silvus Tech and isolated herself in an uncharted island in the Pacific Ocean.

Hi! This is D, and I’ll be reviewing your submitted profile. I think you’ve got a decent base with Mikaela, but her profile could be expanded on and rounded out better to further establish her character.

Starting with her Appearance section, I think some reformatting would help most to streamline the information as it’s presented to readers. As is, all the details are just clumped together into one single paragraph. Breaking up this section into individual aspects (Height, Weight, Eye Color, Hair Color, etc.) would allow for more focus as well as making sure the basic aspects of Mikaela’s appearance aren’t lost within a jumble. This would also allow you to focus the actual Appearance section on more characterizing things, like her build, what types of clothes she wears, and her posture (as well as things like identifying marks). While you’ve got touches of this included already, spreading things out and expanding a little more would help give a clearer written depiction of Mikaela. I’d also suggest including her Overwatch callsign (Paradox) under an ‘Alias’ entry here as well.

The same advice goes for Mikaela’s Personality section. Streamlining the information and using more direct phrasing would help focus on the key aspects of her character. Also, the trait equation in the beginning isn’t needed if you’re going into detail about Mikaela’s personality immediately afterwords. I’d suggest removing that and keeping the focus in the rest of the description. Like the Appearance section, adding in more subsections would help keep focus on the various aspects of Mikaela’s character in a more easily readable format. Breaking it up into sections such as Likes, Dislikes, Hobbies, etc. would give a more direct way of highlight that information, while also providing space to emphasize Mikaela’s other traits (such as her Goals, Hobbies, and Skills). A fair amount of this information is already included – Mikaela enjoying reading, her desire to be an engineer, and her dislike of crowds – but having specific sections would allow for additional detail while leaving the Personality section more room to highlight Mikaela herself.

Regarding Mikaela’s Background, it could also be streamlined and some sections might benefit from being reconsidered. The general gist of her home-schooled upbringing and poorly socialized high school years are important, but could be condensed into a single section rather than spaced out as much. Conversely, Mikaela’s involvement with Althea could be focused on a little more. As is the progression of their relationship is mostly glossed over and their status at Silvus Tech isn’t explained very well. Do they own the company or just work for it? Mikaela ‘handing’ the company to Althea and later shutting it down implies a high degree of control, but their actual positions at Silvus Tech are never pointed out. Also, inclusions like Althea being the person Mikaela trusts the most to handle the company are good, while the added parenthetical comment ‘who isn’t her aunt, uncle, or cat’ is just distracting. I’d suggest removing asides like this as they break the focus away from Mikaela’s history.

Moving on to the storm, I think that Mikaela’s injury should be reconsidered. Being impaled through the heart by a tree branch (not to mention also being hit by the tree itself) seems like an instantly fatal situation. Beyond that, if the storm is severe enough that it’s uprooting trees, why are Mikaela and Althea out in it to begin with? If the objective is for Mikaela to get an artificial heart and meet Dr. Ziegler, I’d suggest something more recoverable like an illness or genetic issue. I’d also suggest highlighting Mikaela’s engineering skills more beforehand to better explain Dr. Ziegler’s interest in her. What has she made that particularly stands out? What field does she specialize in? If it’s supposed to tie into the 'artificial heart’ thing, having Mikaela engineer her own artificial heart seems like it could work very well given Dr. Ziegler’s focus on medical technology (perhaps she even used some of  Mercy’s research to do it, which would segue nicely into her using Symmetra’s teleporter). Making this a more active part of Mikaela’s story would go a long way to helping establish her not only as an engineer, but an asset to Overwatch as a whole.

Regarding the mishap with the teleporter and Mikaela being lost between sections of reality – it seems a bit too convenient of a way to give her powers. It also seems a bit too reminiscent of Tracer being unstuck in time. If you’re determined to keep it as part of Mikaela’s history I’d suggest explaining it more thoroughly. How did her time in this alternate reality affect her personality? What kind of 'toxins’ gave her these abilities? How is she able to use them in the normal layer of reality if they only affected her on the other layer? Personally, I’d suggest having Mikaela’s abilities stem from her own engineering achievements. This would do a lot to keep focus on her skills, as well as serving as a good way to highlight what exactly Mikaela did while working at Overwatch. As is, her two main ‘accomplishments’ were actually accidents that don’t add anything to her agency within the story.

Moving on, given that the game is an first-person shooter I find it surprising that Mikaela’s own weapons aren’t emphasized very much. The only mention in her profile is that she can create throwing knives in her Appearance section (which is a little out of place). I’d suggest making a separate 'Powers’ section to emphasize all of Mikaela’s different abilities, how they work, as well as her Fighting Style and specific Weapons. Also, while it’s great that the profile explains what these abilities do, having explicit cool-downs and individual time durations isn’t necessary. Think of how the Overwatch characters are presented in the animated shorts. While they might use the same powers and weapons as they do in the game, they aren’t beholden to the game’s rules and regulations. Instead, how their abilities work is determined by the narrative rather than numbers.

Also the final section of Mikaela’s background doesn’t do very much to explain her having a presence in the current events of the game. Mikaela’s reaction to Althea’s death seems rather extreme, especially for a relationship that the profile only provides a general overview of. Also her choice to isolate herself on an island in the Pacific runs completely counter to the idea of Mikaela showing up when the game itself is taking place. I’d suggest revising this aspect of her history so it’s not as final and leaving it more open. All of the current characters are involved in Overwatch out of personal interest and had their backstories left open-ended to explain why they are present in the game itself.

Beyond all of that, I’d also suggest adding in a Relationships section. Moving past all of the individual background bits, this is a big part of what makes Overwatch characters so interesting – their interactions and relationships with one another. Mikaela’s profile gives an overview of her different relationships, but doesn’t go into specifics aside from a bit about Althea. Giving more specific details about Mikaela’s relationships with her various family members (especially her aunt and uncle) as well as a specific section to highlight how things progressed between her and Althea would help a lot. Similarly, sections about Mikaela’s relationships with various canon Overwatch characters would help too. Mercy and Symmetra have already been mentioned as fellow scientists – did Mikaela get along with them, or did they disagree about certain things? Would she have kept mostly to Overwatch’s science-types (Winston, Mei, Torbjorn) or would she have gotten involved with the other departments as well? Does Mikaela have any bias against the Omnic members of Overwatch, given the Omnic Crisis’ lingering effects on her childhood? Going by Mikaela’s age, she would have joined Overwatch during its waning years when Blackwatch’s clandestine and illegal activities were beginning to come to light. Did she support Blackwatch’s efforts or did she not know about them at all? What were her thoughts on the conflict between Gabriel Reyes and Jack Morrison? Where was she when the Overwatch headquarters was destroyed? Overwatch has a lot of history behind it, almost all of which is tied up in the interpersonal relationships between various characters. Highlighting that more would help explain Mikaela’s place in that world as well as add that much more detail to her character.

All in all, I think you’ve got a decent base for Mikaela, her profile just needs some reformatting and expanded sections. Being specific and using more direct language would help to maintain focus as well, keeping the progression on Mikaela herself rather than potentially distracting the reader.

I hope this helps!

-D