#I feel damn near agoraphobic recently it’s so awful like everything is scary all the time but at home it’s safe
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#I feel damn near agoraphobic recently it’s so awful like everything is scary all the time but at home it’s safe#like my room is my whole world most of the time bc everything else just feels like too much like there’s something bad out there waiting for#me to get too comfortable to feel too safe too happy and it’ll all come crashing down again it’s just miserable#need to go outside more but there keeps being people on the trails I like to walk and then I like awkwardly speed walk huffing and puffing#my way back to the car really quickly bc being seen by anyone outside of family or therapy for any amount of time feels like being stripped#naked and thrown to the wolves even tho I’m literally just walking outside in a place I’m allowed to walk surrounded by other ppl just#minding their own business#it’s fucking exhausting to be this scared all the time and it makes my muscle shit flare up cause I’m so tense and I can’t get my shoulder#or neck to relax and my back and hips hurt cause I haven’t been moving enough cause I’ve been rotting in bed#tomorrow I’ll go for a walk if it’s not raining#I need to move again and force myself to at least have one place out of the house (other than the car) that feels safe to be#📸
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