#I should have finished this sooner for now i must draw yandere heart broken and alone skall

[iskalldaily]

“You have everybody dearest to you always at hand; I, probably, never shall again; and therefore, till I have outlived all my affections, a post office, I think, must always have power to draw me out in worse weather than today.” ― Jane Austen, Emma

[psychosistr]

Worth It Chapter 12- Broken, Part 2

Summary: Joseph arrives home, eager to tell Caesar something good, but an unfortunate event in the kitchen leads to a different kind of conversation.

Notes: So, this chapter gets bloody as it is still a serial killer/yandere au. There’s violence, unnamed character death, and more swearing.

Joseph hummed along happily to the radio as he drove down the long, winding road that lead him home every evening after work. It was already starting to get dark out, the traffic having delayed him quite a bit, but even that couldn’t dampen his good mood. He was in the mood for something special for dinner tonight to celebrate- maybe he could get Caesar to teach him how to make that squid ink pasta he’d had when they first met in Italy! That would be perfect! They could have that with some of Caesar’s favorite wine and maybe binge on some ice cream for dessert and-

Joseph’s train of thought derailed as he pulled up to the house.

There was an unfamiliar car parked in the yard.

Joseph quickly pulled over behind some trees on the edge of the property and turned off the engine and the lights so as not to give himself away. Joseph took off his suit jacket and tie and left them in the passenger seat with his briefcase and lunchbox. He had no idea what was going on, but the sight of the other car immediately put him on edge and his instincts told him to be prepared for the worst…

He exited the car silently, leaving the door unlocked in case he needed to grab Caesar and get out of there in a hurry. Joseph moved quickly and quietly towards the car and saw that it was empty, the driver nowhere in sight. He crept towards the house and noticed the front door with a stifled gasp. The entire lock and handle had been knocked out and the door was wide open!

Joseph’s heart felt like it had stopped. ‘Caesar! Caesar was in the living room! Is he still in there?! Did someone get to him?! Did he get outside?! Is he gone?! Is he hurt?! CAESAR!!’

Joseph’s mind raced with worry and panic, his earlier quite, controlled pace forgotten as he rushed inside and looked around desperately. “Caesar?!” He called into the darkness. He ran into the living room and noticed the chaotic state it was in- clear signs of a struggle still strewn about the room. Joseph got closer to the couch where he’d left Caesar that morning and it felt like a stone just dropped from his chest down through his stomach. “Oh my god..Caesar…”

There was blood splattered on the couch and along the floor, not a ton, but enough to be noticeable against the pale colors in the dark. Then, he spotted it- Caesar’s chain and shackle were lying on the floor, the shackle broken and lying in pieces of fabric and metal that glinted in the low-light of the barely lit room.

Joseph felt his blood turning ice cold and his legs felt almost numb, like they could collapse out from under him at any moment. He should have been here. He should have installed better security on the doors. He should have gotten home sooner. He should have BEEN there to HELP Caesar, damn it! Now Caesar was gone, or worse, and he-

A gunshot and a distant swear brought Joseph out of his spiraling thoughts of depression and dread. Joseph knew he didn’t keep any guns in the house- he found them too troublesome and a pain to deal with- so that had to belong to whoever broke in. They were still in the house! Joseph quickly kneeled down and pulled up his pants leg enough to grab the special knife he kept hidden in his sock for when the mood to kill someone struck him without time to plan appropriately- it was a long flick-blade that was kept razor-sharp and had knuckle grips to keep it from slipping out of his hand.

His gaze hardened as he rose to his feet, the knife opened and set in his hand as he stalked through the house to the source of the gunfire. Whoever this bastard was, they were going to pay dearly for what they did to his precious Caesar. Joseph stayed silent as he moved through the house, keeping close to the walls so as to blend in with the shadows as much as possible. His years of experience with murdering others was serving him well now, he thought briefly.

The sounds he heard lead him to the kitchen. The lights were still off, making it hard to see, but there was just enough moonlight coming in through the windows to illuminate the man standing in the center of the room. Joseph knew instantly from the silhouette and the bits that he could see through the darkness that it definitely wasn’t Caesar, but he couldn’t see much else in the room aside from directly where the man was standing. A pale glint of light on metal revealed the gun still held firmly in his hand.

The man angrily rubbed something out of his eyes and Joseph caught the smell of something spicy- chilies? Chili pepper? Why-? “Argh, you little shit! When I get my hands on you, you’re gonna WISH I finished you off on that fuckin’ couch!!”

Joseph’s heart swelled with hope and relief at the man’s words: Caesar had been the only one in the house, the only one who even knew about it- that bastard had to be talking to Caesar! Caesar was alive! He was alive and fighting back against that damned intruder!

‘Of course he’s fighting back, giving that bastard what he deserves- my Caesar’s no push over. That’s part of why I love him~<3’ Joseph thought with a growing smirk. ‘This should make things easier: If he’s focused on Caesar, then that means he doesn’t know I’m home yet. As much as I’d love to take my time torturing this idiot, I’ll have to take him down quickly- don’t want to scare Caesar off after all the hard work I put in to making him trust me again…’

Joseph crept through the shadows, slow and silent so as not to draw attention to himself, and made his way closer to the intruder. He crouched down by the cabinets as the man blinked the substance out of his eyes. “God fucking damn it!” He looked around, his focus clearly not back quite yet. “Come out, fucker!”

Seeing his opportunity, Joseph took a slow step forward while remaining crouched. It should have been an easy, stealthy approach, but his foot stepped on something his eyes hadn’t yet adjusted enough to see- a small, broken glass container of red powder that had been lying on the floor, likely the source of the substance that the man had been rubbing out of his eyes. The small crunch normally would have been easy to miss, but in the tense, silent atmosphere it was as loud as a plate being smashed.

The man whipped around in Joseph’s direction and pointed the gun at him, now able to notice the out-of-place shadow by the cabinets. “Shit!” Joseph swore as he quickly rolled out of the way, barely able to avoid the shot that had been aimed at his head. Unfortunately, the intruder could track his movements better now and kicked Joseph in the torso before he had a chance to recover. “!!!!” The wind was knocked out of Joseph, leaving him gasping for breath as he attempted to get to his knees.

The man pointed the gun at Joseph’s face. “Don’t fuckin’ move!” He squinted in the dark, trying to see better. “Wait..you ain’t that blond bastard..damn it, you must be the fucker that owns the place..”

Joseph glared at him, trying to regulate his breathing. “Yeah. That’d be me…and if you touched one hair on my precious Caesar’s head, you won’t live long enough to regret it…” He gripped his knife tighter, keeping it hidden behind his hip and thigh in hopes that the man hadn’t noticed it earlier.

The bastard smirked down at Joseph, looking smug and oozing contempt. “Oh, I touched a bit more than just your little bitch’s hair, rich brat.”

Joseph saw red, rage filling him like a tidal wave. “What the fuck did you just say?!!!” The implications of that statement, in addition to the derogatory term he used to refer to Caesar, made Joseph’s body move on its own. “I’LL FUCKING KILL YOU!!!!!” He practically roared in rage and sprang to his feet, taking the man by surprise as Joseph slashed at his empty hand with the knife before moving in for a hopefully fatal shot to his vitals.

Unfortunately, while still in pain, the bastard was prepared this time for an attack and was able to pistol whip Joseph dangerously close to his temple. “Mother fucker!” Joseph recoiled from the hit, fighting off a wave of dizziness and the ringing in his head as he attempted to stay upright. He saw the gun being pointed at him, along with a dark blur moving behind the man. “That’s it! I’ve had it with you bastards! First, I’m gonna kill your smug rich ass! Then, I’m gonna finish things with your fucking bitch!”

Just as Joseph was about to try and move away, even if he was unsteady on his feet, the dark blur behind the man raised something into the air- something BIG- and brought it down hard enough to smash it to pieces over the intruders head and back. “Don’t you dare, BASTARDO!!!”

The intruder fell to the ground and Joseph blinked the dizziness away, his face lighting up when he heard the voice. “Caesar!” He tried taking a step forward, so relieved just to hear his voice- to know that Caesar was indeed okay and still there with him. “Caesar, you’re-!” He felt unsteady as he tried to move and almost fell.

Caesar was quickly at his side, helping him stay standing. “Be careful, idiota!” Caesar frowned up at him, Joseph able to see his face now that they were so close in the dim lighting. “That hit sounded pretty hard. How close did it get to your temple?”

Joseph shook his head, the dizziness already starting to fade. “I’ll be fine.” He cupped Caesar’s face, noticing the blood splattered on his head and body. “What about you? Did he hurt you? Did..Did he…?” He couldn’t even bring himself to finish the question, the thought of that FILTH desecrating his beautiful, precious, perfect Caesar made him feel nauseous.

Caesar put his hand over Joseph’s where it was cupping his cheek in an attempt to reassure him as he shook his head. “He…He tried…but I got away…”

Joseph pulled Caesar to him, keeping him held as close as possible in a tight embrace. “Oh, thank god…” He buried his face in Caesar’s shoulder and wrapped his arms around his waist. “I’m so glad..I-I saw the car, and the door, and-and the couch, and I..I thought that you were..!” God, he couldn’t even say it- the thought of ever losing Caesar terrified him to his core.

He could feel Caesar’s hands rubbing across his back and head. “It’s okay, Jojo..I’m okay..we’re both okay..” He felt Caesar place a kiss on his head while his fingers ran through his hair in a soothing motion. “Honestly, I was worried about you, too…I saw what time it was and knew you’d be home soon and..I was worried you’d get shot if he saw you come in, so when I got away, I figured it’d be easier to finish him off in here..”

Joseph lifted his head back up to look properly at Caesar again and couldn’t help the beginnings of a smile tugging at his lips. “That was a nice idea, Caesar. Gotta ask, though- did you SERIOUSLY throw chili pepper in his eyes?”

Caesar gave him a similar smile right back. “Yes. And I broke one of the dining chairs over his head. Sorry about that one.” His tone didn’t sound even remotely sorry and Joseph loved him all the more for it.

“Pfft, who cares about some lousy chair, huh? They were tacky, anyway- now I’ve got an excuse to buy a new set!” He stated with a laugh.

Caesar chuckled and shook his head with an amused smile. “You are absolutely terrible, Jojo.” He smirked slightly. “They were kind of ugly, though..I almost feel like I did you a favor…” They both laughed at that, the atmosphere feeling less suffocating now that they were able to make a joke out of this horrible situation.

Joseph smiled before taking Caesar’s hand in his. He looked down at Caesar’s exposed wrist where the shackle had been and was relieved to see it wasn’t injured, but part of him was nervous now that Caesar was unchained: He could run away now. He could get out through the broken door. He could try to leave Joseph and never come back. He could-

Joseph found his train of thought derailed once again that evening when he saw movement behind Caesar and caught the glint of pale light on metal once more. It was instinct alone that drove his body, because by the time his mind caught up to what was happening he was already throwing Caesar out of the way and diving in the opposite direction. “Watch out!” The shot rang out loud in the dark kitchen and Joseph felt a stinging, burning pain shooting up his side as he hit the floor. “Ngh! Shit!” He took a quick glance down his body and saw that the outer edge of his shirt along the side of his abs was stained red and had been split open, but it thankfully didn’t look too deep. He looked back up towards the source of the shot and saw the previously downed intruder getting up onto his knees and preparing for another shot.

“Fuckin..crazy..bastards..!!” The man panted out through grit teeth, the arm holding his gun wavering slightly like he was still dizzy from the chair that Caesar broke over his head earlier. “I got one bullet left and it’s going straight through your fuckin’ head if it’s the last thing I do!!”

He seemed dead-set in his convictions, Joseph could see the blood lust and intent in his eyes. ‘Huh..so that’s what it’s like from the other side..feels kind of weird..’ A distant part of him was almost amused by the thought- to finally get to see the eyes of a killer staring back at him that wasn’t just his reflection in a mirror was new for Joseph. He would try to dodge, but at least he could take some comfort in knowing that if he was unsuccessful that Caesar wouldn’t be hurt- he would easily be able to take out an unarmed punk like him if his main threat was gone.

As he waited for the trigger to be pulled, Joseph got that odd feeling of experiencing everything in slow motion again: He saw the man’s finger start to squeeze the trigger. He distantly heard someone calling out his name over the ringing in his ears from the pain. He saw movement from the corner of his eye. He saw Caesar rush at the man’s side with Joseph’s knife in his hand. He saw the man fall to the ground just as he tried to fire off his last shot. He felt the air whip by as the bullet just barely missed his head. He saw Caesar straddle the man, raise the knife, and bring it down with both hands, plunging it into the man’s chest. He saw Caesar pull the knife out and plunge it in again..and again..and again…and again…

The world returned to its normal pace and Joseph gasped, staring in shock at Caesar as he continued stabbing the now bloodied body beneath him. Caesar’s eyes were wide and almost manic, his brows were turned down into a glare filled with malice, his lips were set in a scowl as he stabbed anywhere he didn’t already see blood and he screamed out, his voice spitting venom so acidic it would make lesser men turn tail and run. “Nessuno! Ferisce ! Mio! Jojo!!!!” Even after the man was long dead under him, Caesar just kept stabbing him, further mutilating the corpse and adding as many marks as possible. The whole process left him covered in blood and it made Joseph’s heart skip at the sight of Caesar covered in someone else’s blood while wielding his favorite knife.

‘Oh my god! He’s so gorgeous! I just want to hold him and kiss him and fuck him right here on the floor ‘til both of us are covered in blood!’ Joseph bit his lip to hold back any noises that might escape, he wanted to be closer so bad, but didn’t dare disturb the beautiful scene in front of him.

Caesar eventually stopped stabbing the corpse and looked down at his shaking, blood covered hands that still held the knife tight in them. “Haah..haah..hah..” He panted to catch his breath before his eyes slowly turned towards Joseph.

Joseph swallowed at the wide-eyed stare being cast in his direction. Oh no..he couldn’t read Caesar at all right now, couldn’t predict what he was about to do or say next. Caesar’s hands were still gripping the knife and he was able to move freely now. Would he try to attack Joseph for keeping him here all this time? Would he try to take advantage of Joseph’s injured state and run out the door? Joseph got up onto his knees, his body ready for whichever reaction would come. If he had to, he was fairly certain he could disarm Caesar and fight him to a stand-still, and he was more than confidant in his ability to run after him should Caesar choose to run away. He just had to watch Caesar’s movements carefully to determine which he would choose and-

“Jojo!” Caesar cried out to him and dropped the knife. He got up just long enough to run to Joseph before collapsing to his knees in Joseph’s lap and winding his arms around his torso tightly. Oh. That…wasn’t a reaction Joseph expected at all..not that he was complaining, of course.. “Jojo! Ero cosi spaventato! Pensavo-Pensavo che ti avrebbe ucciso! Dovevo-!” Caesar kept speaking in Italian, looking up at Joseph with wide, beseeching eyes and Joseph never wished more in his life that he knew more Italian beyond just a few simple phrases so he could understand what Caesar was trying so desperately to tell him. “Non potevo lasciarti morire! Sei tutto quello che ho! Ho bisogno di te! Ho dovuto ucciderlo! Oh dio, in realta l’ho ucciso…In realta ho UCCISO quell’uomo…” Caesar’s eyes shimmered as tears began to fall from them, the clear liquid cutting trails through the red blood splattered on his cheeks to reveal his birthmarks underneath.

Joseph’s heart felt like it was being squeezed in a vice. He never wanted to see his beautiful, precious Caesar so upset about anything in his life. “Caesar…” He spoke softly, bringing his hands up to cup Caesar’s cheeks and wipe away his tears with his thumbs. “Caesar, tesoro mio, it’s okay..just breathe..please..I can’t understand you when you’re all worked up like this..I’m right here, so just breathe and relax..it’s all over now, you’re safe..I won’t let anything else happen to you, I promise..” He knew Caesar hated being placated, but it was the best comfort he could offer him until he calmed down enough to remember his English.

Caesar gave a choked sob and closed his eyes, trying to calm himself down as Joseph asked. “I…I KILLED him…I actually KILLED him…dio mio, I’m a MURDERER…”

Joseph frowned at that statement, but did his best to remind himself how most people viewed the act of taking someone else’s life. “Hey, that monster tried to HURT you- tried to KILL us. You saved my LIFE, Caesar! If you hadn’t done that, I would have DIED! You did what you had to do-”

“You don’t get it!” Caesar suddenly cried out, bringing his hands up to cover his face. He said something that became muffled by his hands and Joseph gently pulled at them.

“What? Caesar, I can’t hear you when you do that…” Joseph said gently as he managed to pry Caesar’s hands from his face. He leaned closer to make sure he wouldn’t miss Caesar’s words this time. “Now, what is it I’m not getting…?”

Caesar looked up at him. “I..I..” He took in a shaky breath, his body shuddering as he whispered, unable to look Joseph in the eyes. “I LIKED it…”

Joseph blinked and pulled back to look at Caesar in surprise. That..had not been what he expected at all. “You did..?” He did his best to hide the shock (and bit of hope) from his voice.

Caesar gave a weak nod of his head. “I..I did..I know that man was a monster, especially with what he tried to do to us..and I’ll never regret protecting you…but…when I killed him..” Caesar looked down at his bloody hands, some of the blood now rubbed off onto his face from his earlier motions. “I..had so much pent up negativity in me..anger..rage..depression..resentment..not from being around you, but just..just EVERYTHING…like..everything in my life had built up into this dark ball that was stuck inside of me..but when I killed him, it was like..like-”

“Like a bottle cap bursting off the top of a shaken up soda, finally letting everything out and leaving you lighter than you’ve ever felt before.” Joseph finished calmly, running a hand through Caesar’s hair gently.

Caesar blinked and stared up at Joseph in surprise and wonder. “Exactly! How did you…?”

Joseph gave him a soft smile and leaned in to gently kiss one of Caesar’s bloodied cheeks. “I understand it a bit better than you might think.” He smiled more at the look on Caesar’s face, both surprised and relieved while still being curious. “I can explain later. For now, we should get you cleaned up, then I’ll deal with this mess.”

And with that declaration, Joseph picked up Caesar and took him to the bathroom, stopping by the living room long enough to unhook the chain off of the couch and detach the broken shackle before reattaching it to the one on Caesar’s other wrist- Caesar didn’t fight him once or even look towards the broken door. He ran a bath and set Caesar down in the tub. He debated about joining him, but figured he would just get dirty again when he went to clean up the body, so he sat on the floor by the edge of the tub and just rolled up his sleeves so he could gently rinse and clean the blood off of Caesar. Without a word of complaint, Caesar allowed Joseph to clean him up, sitting in the tub until the water was tainted pink from the blood. Joseph drained the tub and rinsed Caesar off one more time for good measure (he knew how unpleasant dried blood could feel) before gently lifting him out and toweling him off.

During the process of drying him off and wrapping the towel around his body, though, Caesar seemed to finally take notice of Joseph’s side. His eyes, which had become calm and complacent over the course of the bath, widened in alarm when he saw the blood. “When did that happen?! Idiota, you should have said something!” He opened the drawer that contained the first aid kit and motioned for Joseph to take his shirt off. “Off. NOW. I’m going to take a look at that.”

Joseph wanted to say he was fine, but one look from Caesar stopped that remark before it even left his throat. “Y-Yes, Caesar..” He obeyed Caesar’s orders and removed his torn and bloody shirt, tossing it into the bathtub with Caesar’s own clothes to soak and remove the blood stains later. He sat on the sink counter when Caesar patted it in indication and waited patiently as Caesar examined and treated the wound.

As he worked, Joseph quietly contemplated the new information about Caesar that had come to light. ‘So..Caesar might be more like me than I thought..that..would be nice..to finally have someone who REALLY gets me. I always knew Caesar and I understood each other on a deeper level than anyone else, but I didn’t think it would go THAT deep. Maybe…Maybe we could do it..together..as a couple..’ His heart fluttered at the image: Him and Caesar, brutally dismembering anyone who crossed them or caught their attention the wrong way. The two of them working together to drag screams out of their victims. Caesar, a smile on that beautiful face, covered in someone else’s blood and beckoning Joseph to come closer, to hold him and kiss him until they were both covered in the warm red liquid, to undress him and-

“Jojo!” Joseph’s fantasies were interrupted by the real Caesar snapping at him with a scowl.

Joseph immediately looked back down at him, feeling embarrassed by being caught spacing out like that. “H-Huh? Sorry, you say something?” He gave a nervous smile and could feel his cheeks flushing a bit.

Caesar huffed in annoyance and shot Joseph a withering look. “I was saying that the damage doesn’t look too bad- there’s no bullet fragments in the wound, but you will still need a few stitches to seal this gash. You should probably go to the hospital to get it treated properly, but I can do it if you’d prefer.”

Joseph put his hands together in a pleading gesture and closed one eye with a sheepish smile. “Um, would you mind doing it? I kinda don’t want to get the police involved in all of this.”

Caesar sighed and folded his arms. “Are you sure? There aren’t any proper sedatives or injectable pain killers in the first aid kit. Even with the topical gel, it’s going to hurt. A lot. Also, while I CAN do it, I’m not exactly trained for this sort of thing and might do a sloppy job.”

Joseph just smiled brightly at Caesar’s concern. He was really just too sweet and so cute. “Don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine- I’m tough, remember?” He winked and flexed one of his muscular arms. “Besides-” He took one of Caesar’s hands in his own and gave it a gentle squeeze before bringing it to his lips and kissing it. “I trust you, Caesar. I know you’ll take good care of me.”

Caesar blushed at both the comment and the gesture and Joseph mentally patted himself on the back- his flirting skills have gotten much better since Caesar’s little lesson a while back. “F-Fine, idiota..” Caesar mumbled, looking at the first aid kit to avoid looking at Joseph’s smug smile. “But don’t come crying to me if it hurts later.”

Joseph chuckled and got down onto the floor to lay on his side, giving Caesar all the room he would need to stitch up the wound. “I’ll just ask you to kiss it better~<3” He teased with another wink before yelping when Caesar dropped a dollop of the topical numbing gel on his non-injured skin around the wound. “OH MY GOD! That’s so cold!”

Caesar smirked the tiniest bit at the reaction while rubbing the gel into Joseph’s skin with a cotton swab. “Remember- no crying.” Having said that, Caesar got to work on stitching Joseph’s wound closed using some surgical thread and a sterilized needle from the first aid kit. As he worked, his eyes returned to that calm complacency they’d had when Joseph was washing the blood off of him in the tub. Joseph wasn’t entirely sure what to make of that look. He was glad Caesar wasn’t panicked or upset anymore, but he still didn’t seem quite like himself yet either. “You…” Caesar suddenly spoke as he worked, Joseph able to easily ignore the pain in favor of listening to Caesar. “You got this..when you pushed me out of the way earlier..didn’t you…?”

Joseph winced slightly at a tug from the needle but kept his voice even. “I, uh..don’t really know..maybe? I just remember hitting the ground and having trouble moving afterwards..honestly forgot about it till you pointed it out..didn’t even feel any pain for a while.”

Caesar frowned slightly as he looped the thread around another turn. “You said that last time, too…”

Joseph was confused by that for a minute, before he remembered the incident with the snake and his arm getting cut open. He hadn’t really felt that, either. “Oh yeah. Guess when it comes to stuff involving you my adrenaline goes crazy or something and blocks out the pain.” He mused aloud. Remembering that unfortunate morning in the kitchen where his feet got cut up and burned, Joseph recalled not feeling anything then, either. Maybe it really was just something about Caesar that made him not notice when he was in pain? He almost wanted to experiment with that concept, but he knew Caesar probably wouldn’t approve of that. “Anyway, it’s probably a good thing it doesn’t hurt, right?”

Caesar frowned a bit more, not looking comforted by Joseph’s words by the time he was almost done with the stitches. “Just because you can’t feel it, doesn’t mean it isn’t still dangerous..you could have gotten hurt worse and not even felt it..if I hadn’t seen this, you could have gotten an infection and had to go to the emergency room..what if I couldn’t get you there in time? What if neither of us noticed it and it turned out there was something worse underneath? What if-?” Caesar stopped when Joseph let out a hiss from the last stitch being tied too tight. “Sorry…” He said sullenly and grabbed the scissors to cut out and redo the last stitch, falling silent again and keeping his eyes on his work. “….”

Joseph frowned as he watched Caesar. He seemed so upset, but Joseph still couldn’t fully figure out why. When Caesar finished the last stitch and covered the area with some bandages, Joseph reached up and cupped Caesar’s cheek tenderly in his hand. Caesar simply leaned into the touch. “Caesar..” Caesar looked down at him, but didn’t move away from his hand at all. “I can tell something’s on your mind. Talk to me. Please…”

Caesar took in a deep breath and closed his eyes for a minute, gathering his thoughts before looking back down at Joseph again. “Back there, in the kitchen, I..I thought..I was going to lose you..and..I was scared..” He put his hand over Joseph’s where it still rested on his cheek and squeezed it. Joseph could feel the fine tremor going through Caesar’s body now. “I..I can’t lose you, Jojo..I can’t..you’re all I have..please..I can’t go back to being alone like before, Jojo..”

Joseph’s eyes softened as he gazed at his beloved partner. “Caesar…” He sat up and pulled Caesar into his lap with his other hand, just like in the kitchen, and pressed tender, gentle kisses all over Caesar’s face as he spoke. “I’m sorry, Caesar. I didn’t mean to make you worry. You told me last time to be more careful, too…I promise, from now on, I’ll be extra careful. But..I will still ALWAYS look after you. You’re my partner..my beloved, perfect, wonderful partner..and I never want to be the reason for you to be upset…” He pulled back to look Caesar in the eyes so his next words wouldn’t be missed. “I promise, Caesar, I won’t EVER leave you. For as long as you live, and even after that if I can help it, I will always be with you. I love you, Caesar, and I will never break a promise to you. Okay?” He held out his pinky finger to seal the promise, smiling softly at Caesar.

Caesar managed a small smile of his own and wrapped his own pinky finger around Joseph’s. “Okay…”

Joseph smiled more and placed a kiss on Caesar’s pinky before carefully getting to his feet and offering Caesar a hand to do the same. Caesar held onto his hand and didn’t let go, watching with that calm complacency as Joseph filled the tub with cold water and left their clothes to soak in it with some detergents. Even when they went back into the bedroom, Caesar was still holding onto his hand.

Joseph gently guided Caesar to the bed and moved to hook the chain to its proper location. “Alright, you get some rest in here while I go clean everything up, okay?”

Before he could hook the chain, though, Caesar grabbed his hand with a wide-eyed, almost fearful look. “Wait!” Joseph stopped and looked at Caesar in surprise when the blond just held on tighter. “Please..don’t go..”

Joseph frowned a bit. Guess Caesar still wasn’t fully back to normal yet. “I have to go clean up the mess, Caesar. If I don’t it’s gonna smell awful in the morning. Plus, I still have to do something about that car out front.”

Instead of letting go, Caesar just held on tighter. “Then let me stay with you! Please, Jojo..I..I really don’t want to be alone right now…” He looked down, his voice sounding almost broken and defeated. “Please..I’ll stay out of the way..just..don’t leave me alone…”

Joseph frowned more for a minute. Damn it. Caesar really was messed up from all of this. Not that Joseph could blame him, but, still, it hurt to see him like this. He smiled in a gentle, understanding way and squeezed Caesar’s hand comfortingly. “Okay. You can stay with me. Just let me know if you start to feel sick or anything, okay?” Caesar nodded and Joseph helped him change into some clean clothes and led him back out of the room.

Joseph grabbed the cleaning supplies he needed, Caesar helping him carry everything, and started in the living room. Joseph got a temporary lock fitted into the door- it could only lock from the inside and didn’t have the keyhole on the inside like the other one did, but it would have to do for now. He then proceeded to clean up the blood splatter on the couch and floor while Caesar picked the various odds and ends up off of the floor and emptied their stuff out of the bags the man had loaded everything into.

At one point, while picking everything up, Caesar found the remains of his shackle and picked them up carefully. He kneeled down next to Joseph, who was in the middle of spot-treating the couch, and held out the broken pieces in his hands. “Can you get this fixed?”

Joseph blinked in surprise and took the pieces. “You..want me to fix it..?”

Caesar nodded and looked down at his bare wrist. “It..It feels weird not to have it on there anymore..feels wrong..” A tiny smile tugged at his lips as he looked back at the pieces. “Besides, wearing that actually saved my life- I blocked the first bullet he fired at me with that and it broke. You would have enjoyed seeing it..would have been like that ‘Wonderful Girl’ or whatever her name is from your comics..”

Joseph chuckled. “That’s not her name and you know it, damn it. But, yeah, that does sound like something I’d like to see.” He looked back down at the pieces in his hands. “As for fixing this, I’ll see what I can do. If nothing else, I can get the metal melted down and re-forged into a new one. Okay?”

Caesar nodded and leaned his forehead onto Joseph’s shoulder. “Grazie, Jojo.”

Joseph just smiled and kissed Caesar’s head before getting back to work. After the living room was clean and restored to a semi-livable state again, they moved on to the kitchen. Caesar hesitated when he saw the body lying on the floor and Joseph squeezed his hand to reassure him. “If you don’t want to be here, I can take you to another room while I work on this.”

Caesar shook his head. “No. I..I want to stay with you.”

“Okay, but let me know if it gets to be too much.” Joseph said as he spread out a tarp that he rolled the body onto. Once the body was in place, Joseph grabbed a bag of tools he’d brought in with the cleaning supplies and pulled out a bone saw. He worked diligently on dismembering the body into very small, easily manageable parts.

Caesar sat nearby, watching him with that eerie sense of calmness about him. “You’ve done this before.” It was a statement, not a question.

“Yeah..” Joseph admitted while sawing off a leg. “A few times.”

“You said you understood how I felt…so…that means you’ve killed people before…” His tone didn’t sound accusatory or nervous, so Joseph took that as a good sign.

“I have. A lot over the years.” He got through part of the leg and started on the next part. “The first time was an accident- some asshole at one of my boarding schools that wouldn’t leave me alone followed me into the woods and I strangled him. I left his body to get eaten by some animals. No one ever found him.” He wiped some blood splatter off of his hands onto the tarp and continued cutting. “It felt..really good..like it was the stress relief I’d been searching for my whole life. After that, I kept finding new people to go after anytime I got that stressed again. People who annoyed me, who caused trouble for my family, or just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time- I’m not usually too picky…”

Caesar nodded as he listened, then, he asked what felt like a loaded question. “Did you kill my exes?”

“Some of them.” Joseph gave the safest answer he could think of- it wouldn’t do any good to lie to Caesar at this point but he didn’t want to wreck the trust he’d built between them. “I told you before how angry it made me when they took the money. Sometimes I lost my temper and killed them.” His blood boiled slightly at the memory of the ones who agreed to take the money from him, how they just disregarded the perfection that was Caesar A. Zeppeli in exchange for some financial compensation. “They had it coming, though…treating you like that…they DESERVED to die…” He gripped the saw tighter and finished off the leg he was working on.

Caesar was quiet for a while before he spoke again, softly, almost inaudibly. “Yeah..guess they did have it coming…”

Joseph relaxed a bit at that, glad that Caesar seemed so understanding now that Joseph’s biggest secret was out in the open. There would probably be other things they had to talk over, but they would deal with that as it came up. For now, he focused on disposing of the body and cleaning up the kitchen.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The entire cleanup process took quite a few hours. Between cutting up the body, cleaning up the blood splatter and broken glass, sealing the diced up body parts in containers with some acid to dissolve the flesh and bones, burying the containers in different locations in the forest, taking the car to an abandoned lot closer to town and leaving the keys in it so someone would hopefully steal it (towing his own car behind it so they could drive back home afterwards), and setting everything that had been taken back into its proper place, it was almost sunrise by the time they finally fell into bed together. Neither of them had had any dinner, but they were too tired to care and had lost their appetites for the night.

Joseph had to admit, though, he was surprised by how well Caesar had behaved during all of this. The whole time they were outside burying the body parts he didn’t try to run away. Then, when they’d been driving, he never once tried to jump out of the car or roll down the window to try calling for help. Instead, he had just stayed close to Joseph in the forest and gently held onto his arm in the car. Joseph was pleased by the progress this marked- Caesar had been outside for an extended period of time without even trying to escape- but was also a bit worried by how clingy the event had made Caesar. He would probably have to do some research into trauma symptoms and treatments to see if Caesar was showing any signs and how to help him through it…

For now, though, he focused on making Caesar comfortable in bed with him so they could both sleep. He tried lying on his side to pull Caesar against him as usual, but Caesar stopped him with a hand placed softly on his chest.

Joseph blinked at him in confusion. “Do you..not want me to..?” He was really hoping some cuddling would help Caesar feel better- he knew he needed it right now, too.

“I do, don’t worry. Just..lie down, please..?” Caesar asked with a pleading look. Joseph instantly complied with the request and got comfortable on his back. Caesar soon climbed on top of him, laying with his head turned sideways on Joseph’s chest. “Grazie, Jojo..” He closed his eyes and wrapped his arms around Joseph.

Joseph quickly realized that Caesar was listening to his heartbeat to calm himself so he could sleep. Joseph pulled the blankets up around them and wrapped an arm around Caesar securely while running his free hand through the other’s hair to soothe him to sleep. “Of course- anything for you, Caesar. Sweet dreams. I love you…” He whispered softly and kissed Caesar’s head.

He watched Caesar as he slowly let himself fall asleep. Joseph’s heart ached seeing his precious Caesar so upset. He would do everything in his power to make it up to him. He would do anything at all to make Caesar feel safe and happy again. It wouldn’t matter how much work he would have to put into it because it would be for Caesar- and Caesar would ALWAYS be worth it.

Always.

<-Previous Chapter Next Chapter->

-From the Beginning-

Translations for the Italian (I know it sucks, but all I had was Google Translate, always open for more accurate translations if anyone has any) but it’ll probably just break your hearts more:

“Nessuno! Ferisce ! Mio! Jojo!!!!” - Nobody! Hurts! My! Jojo!!!!

“Jojo! Ero cosi spaventato! Pensavo-Pensavo che ti avrebbe ucciso! Dovevo-!”-      "Jojo! I was so scared! I thought- I thought he would kill you! I had to-!"

“Non potevo lasciarti morire! Sei tutto quello che ho! Ho bisogno di te! Ho dovuto ucciderlo! Oh dio, in realta l’ho ucciso…In realta ho UCCISO quell’uomo…” - "I couldn’t let you die! You're all I have! I need you! I had to kill him! Oh god, I actually killed him...I actually KILLED that man..."