#I spent 8 minutes looking at synonyms for flat

[knightcorqueen]

I am sobbing right now.....

I was working on something for my creative writing class and I decided to stick it into Grammarly real quick just to make sure I got everything.  And well, I'm poor so I don't have the premium option but that's fine because it still underlines everything that would need fixed and I just do whatever I need to to change the sentence and make the little orange line go away.

But this one fvjdyucking sentence - it's got the lil orange line under it

This particular sentence has a semicolon at the end of it.  So I quickly change it to a comma to see if that fixes it.  Nope!  Grammarly doesn't like the sentence!

So I change the sentence! Nope! Grammarly still doesn't like the sentence

I change the comma back to a semicolon: Nope

I change the sentence 3 more times: Nope, Nope, Nope!

I change the semicolon to a period: Still. Doesn't. Work.

I change the period back into a comma: Halle-frickin-lujah 

...........

I spent. 15 McFucking minutes trying to fix a sentence just for the problem to require a McFracking COMMA?!?!

[finn0]

All the houses I’ve lived in

1. 94 Queens Rd, New Lambton, NSW

My parents current house since 1989 and the house I’ve had sex with the most people in. A regular two storey house opposite bush on a nice street with neighbours that don’t talk to you (perfect). 3 bedrooms and 3 bathrooms with air con, a big fireplace, pool and massive garage. Lovely, but I don’t expect to inherit it so the attachment must remain minimal.

2. 11 Cobb Ct, Annandale, QLD

Okay formative toddler years were spent here. A tropical style bungalow with the lowest ceilings you’ve ever seen and even lower hanging ceiling fans (take off your shirt with caution). A massive pool constantly populated with cane toads year round that saturated the yard with chlorine every time a cyclone blew through. More floor space than is necessary for anyone. Horrible, angry neighbours that hated children. Short walk to shops, no air con despite Townsville being the armpit of the country. I spent almost all of time sitting on a Big Bird beanbag watching Sesame Street and screaming in abject terror every time there was a toad sitting in the toilet bowl (which was worryingly frequent).

3. 27 Woodrose Cres, Sinnamon Park, QLD

Literally the ugliest house I’ve ever seen in my life. Gaudy, over-tiled, far too big for any family, nothing but white tiles everywhere and not a tree, nor plant, nor weed in the backyard, just grass the colour of hay. Who in Brisbane requires an attic? Who requires THAT many bedrooms? What the FUCK is that suburb name? This house we thankfully lived in for no more than 7 months but good God what a relief.

4. 45 Clarence Rd, Waratah, NSW

My grandmother Bessie’s house. We lived there for a year while I was in pre-school and while my parents house was being renovated. Absolutely fascinating house that each grandchild loved to visit. The most bizarre things were to be found there. First of all it was a regular 2 bedroom home with gaudy wallpaper and a 1950′s kitchen and bathroom, plenty of living space etc. BUT the bizarre flat that was downstairs under the house that was built for my great-grandmother to inhabit was like stepping a 1950′s motel room. Pea green bathroom, pink kitchen, rising damp, mouldy wallpaper, dust upon dust upon bugs upon discarded venetian blinds. Oh my goodness it was amazing down there. It smelled like a nursing home. PLUS under the house was this enormous space all covered in dirt and other crap and trinkets and sheets. ZERO light penetrated this space and therefore was the best place to crawl around and get spooked. The laundry, also under the house, had high ceilings that were stained a Jackson Pollock amount of colours from years of laundry and rising damp and rain leaks AND leading from under the cupboards in the kitchen upstairs was a laundry chute that led all the way down to the laundry WHICH smaller grandchildren could actually fit into and snake their way down to avoid the prying eyes of older cousins during games of hide and seek. Until you were too big to fit. Like I found out one day. Not an easy search and rescue mission, I’ll tell you that. OH AND the back bedroom had some creepy as shit naked dolls with no hair and meth eyes that rolled back in their head along with like strange 60′s childrens paraphenalia and tiny trinkets that I later found out were things like ACTUAL jewels from Scotland and vintage broken Rolex watches. Also I remember sleeping in that room in my mothers childhood single bed while she slept next to me in another, while my father slept next to my grandmother in a separate single bed in her room (why??). Later after she died, new owners bought the place and my mother met them after a few years and asked if they thought the place was haunted to which they replied an unequivocal “YES”, my mother then asked if they left dishes out in the sink of a night, to which they replied “.....yes” and Mum was like “Well that’s the culprit, my mother would NEVER allow that” and the look of understanding coupled with genuine fear cements the fact that my grandmother was and is a motherfucking force to be reckoned with, alive or dead.

5. 7/58 High St, Randwick, NSW

I moved to Sydney! Why? I don’t know! My partner was doing a degree at UNSW and I went with him because I was 21 and couldn’t stand my parents any longer so I buggered off. Now. This apartment was a second floor walk-up in a WW1 era building opposite a hospital and BEHIND a Coles loading dock. Plus there was a screaming autistic Arabian child downstairs and the loudest dog you’ve ever heard next door. Serene. Peaceful. Damaging to the psyche. We lived with my partners brother which was fine, but that place not only had no heating nor ceiling fans it also had no flyscreens. I didn’t even have my own set of keys. I shared ONE set of keys with my partner for two years. Fucking ridiculous. Yes, the food nearby was good. Yes, I commuted back to Newcastle most weekends to keep my casual job. Yes the neighbours were fascinating, ranging from the American guy across the way who never ever closed his bathroom window and gave me many shows of his frankly monstrous penis, to the chainsmoking nurse below who had a permanent frown despite living across the street from her work, to the Koreans downstairs who constantly cooked delicious barbecue while pretending to not speak English, to the gorgeous gay couple who lived above us who could add a new synonym to the dictionary to define “unfriendly”. We got out just before the new light rail was to begin construction right outside our building, but regardless, because of all the noise that surrounded that place before that, I now can sleep through the sound of a fucking jet engine roaring right next to my face.

6. 145 Wilson St, Carrington, NSW

Back to Newy! Okay so this was the first house we even Googled when looking for a new place back in Newcastle, and weirdly, we got it!. It was a tiny cottage in a harbourside suburb that was across the the street from wheat silos that are literally the size of Windsor castle. The day we moved in, a representative of the Port Authority knocked on our door and told us that if we ever heard a particular siren, that it meant the silos were on fire and an explosion was imminent and that we would have about 10 minutes to evacuate before half the city was Hiroshima-ed. Lovely welcome. We heard that siren (or a siren at least) about 50 times in the 2 years we were there. Pretty alarming, as it were. Anyway, the house was literally 3 rooms and a kitchen, 2 tiny cubicle afterthought bathrooms, and a nice big back deck. Now I was happy there, it had everything I needed, it was pleasant. I had a good garden going and I really learned to cook there. Carrington is where my family is originally from, and it was easy to walk everywhere and I loved the history of it. However, our landlord was a Chinese lady called Winnie who could not have misunderstood the concept of landlord responsibilities less. Any repairs or things we needed, she was not just unavailable but actively apathetic. It was like pulling teeth to get her to even communicate to the property manager in even basic English in regards to anything we required. Our neighbours on one side were a lovely couple with 2 babies but they had a dog called Trippi that would bark whenever someone in the opposite hemisphere coughed, and on the other side were a couple in their 70′s who were both suffering dementia, constantly screaming at each other and who also had two elderly dogs that would bark whenever someone nearby inhaled. For two years I heard literally nothing except Matt’s piano, Trippi barking, the other dogs barking, the neighbours angrily SCREAMING at one another, wheat silo alarms, screeching train tracks and coal tankers blasting their horns as they entered the harbour. Again, seasoned professional, can sleep through anything.

7. 46 Garden Grove Pde, Adamstown Heights, NSW

Alright, so two friends of mine, also a couple, were living in a tiny half house situation and also wanted out of their place, so we decided to all move in together, into a place that was much larger and that we could all collectively afford. So we found this lovely large house with 4+ bedrooms so that we could all have our own space and get on rather well. And it worked out! My partner and I had a great big bedroom, Matt had his own study, we had a library, a music room, and my friends had an enormous bedroom downstairs plus a huge bathroom/laundry AND there was 3 tiers of yard that we grew all sorts of vegetables in, plus it had a driveway that looped around (I would call it a plantation driveway?) so heaps of space for everyone. It was great, plenty of space for guests which we had a lot of, plenty of outdoor areas for entertaining, it was wonderful. But unfortunately my friends relationship ended and an old friend took one of their places for a year (also fine) but eventually it turned out that the place was getting sold and after literally months of surprise inspections and open houses we’d all had enough and decided to move out separately. Now this so far has been my favourite place. It was 10 minutes to work, everyone had their own space and we lived, I think, pretty well harmoniously together. But nothing good lasts so now...!\

8. *** Kings Rd, New Lambton, NSW

From Queens Rd to Kings Rd! We found a gorgeous house right near a train station that I am currently in and pretty happy with. For the first time I have ceiling fans again plus air con and FOUR bedrooms that I barely know what to do with. Currently I’m sitting in my study surrounded by all my books with the fan on typing this out and it feels good to have my own space for a change and actually have trouble furnishing a house as opposed to making concessions about what I keep and what I can’t. I’ve planted a veggie garden, I have my kitchen the way I want, and the house has been renovated, re-carpeted, painted and made livable for a modern couple. We have spare space for guests (or a spare room for me when I don’t want to wake up Matt when I go to bed at 3am, but that’s the sleep pattern of a shift worker) and overall I feel good about it. Finally. I’ve been looking for a good home to just COME HOME to for ages and for a long time I haven’t really felt that. My last home was lovely, but honestly 3 tiers of gardens to maintain and roommates (though they remain dear friends) are just not what I want to deal with anymore. Actually not even that, I’d be fine with roommates, but it’s just nice to feel like I have MY house and it’s mine to come home to.

Anyway, apologies for this long post, and I know barely anyone will read it, but I started this blog TEN years ago so and I don’t have a print journal to write all of this stuff in, so I might as well talk here. HOUSES! If they’re not haunted, then where’s the drama we so desperately crave?

[estherslaming-blog]

I am fat.

She didn’t deserve to feel like that. She didn’t deserve to cry at night wishing she could miss school so she didn’t have to say her weight out loud on science class. 

For so many years she has been so scared, scared of her own weight and the opinion of boys that only like long legs and flat stomach girls and in a world surrounded of skinny dolls with halos made of sensuality it’s hard to not stop and think she doesn’t look like that.

Days where the sun’s heat made sweat roll down on every inch of your body and a poor girl that wore a sweatshirt because she wanted to hide her stomach. A poor girl that compared the size of her thighs to her friends and realizing she was the big friend.

In this if you don’t fit in a small size you need to aport something else. something that makes you worth it. She once heard a girl saying that big girls can’t be mean so she thought that was her job: the big nice friend, the fat funny friend, the chubby smart girl.

And to the woman with blonde curly hair with big butt that once told her that if only she was skinny boys would like her. How dare you? I hope you know that that 8 year old that didn’t even care about boys but then since that moment she felt less than the rest of her skinny friends, she thought that if any boy talked to her was a privilege. She grew up with the idea that it doesn’t matter if you are funny, kind, intelligent, it doesn’t matter because above all that, above all the things you could be you are fat.

Fat. The ugly adjective that no one wants to be. Ever since we are kids that’s what we are taught, we learn that fat is a dirty word, that if you’re fat you’re ugly and being skinny is a synonym of grace and beauty but why?

That 8 year old that was marked with that idea couldn’t understand why wasn’t she worth of attention and affection.

When she grew up she pretended she didn’t care about being described by society as fat or chubby, but oh God knows she did. She spent every minute of the day thinking about those 2 words: fat skinny skinny fat. Comparing herself to instagram models and asking God late at night why wasn’t she born like that, thinking if she looked like she could have all the things she have always wanted.

Looking for tight clothes that could hide her belly, eating and feeling guilty, trying diets without success because she did anything in her power to be skinny but not for her but for all the boys that never looked at her but she wish they did, for her mother that always made sure to remember her not to eat the second portion, for her sister that was the skinny sister, but no diet worked because she was still fat.

She was fat and she was done, not because she didn’t like her skin but because she was done of people referring to her as fat.

yes she was fat so what? She was also intelligent, with a smart mouth and an attitude but with her blood full of kindness that irradiated love and empathy with the people she cared about.

Yes she was fat but she was also a friend and a dancer that forgot she was fat when she on stage, she was fat but the ways her eyes lighted up when she talked with passion could’ve made anyone fall for her if they knew, if they could’ve seen above the label she didn’t ask for but some woman gave to her when she was just 8 years old.

She was 8 years old and since then it has been 11 years of daily struggle in which she has to learn how to love herself every single day, love her stretch marks, her tummy rolls, her not smooth skin in the back of her legs, the way her arms jiggle she she moves.

Yes she is fat but she is beautiful.

Yes she is fat but she loves herself.

[car-loanz]

Prepare your adventure with the road trip planner

  Ideas and resources to get the wheels turning

  There’s nothing quite like the freedom, independence and sense of discovery you get on a road trip, and there are few better places to load up and hit the highway than America. Whether you’re looking to get away in summer or at other times of the year, here are some ideas to get you started, along with tips for what to take, what to eat, what to listen to, and how to prepare your vehicle. Get perusing, get planning, and enjoy the ride.

  Where to go: Destinations and experiences

  California

Road trip: What I learned going from Texas to California

Here are the biggest mistakes Corey Neal learned to never (again) make on a long-distance road trip, planned or spontaneous.

Road trip: Western calm in wine country

Exploring Bodega Bay and the charming towns and vineyards of Sonoma County, on the Californian coast, in a Chrysler minivan.

  Colorado

Road trip: Across the Rocky Mountains in Colorado

From Denver, the Mile High City, across the Rocky Mountains to Vail, CO, is a majestic road trip that will take your breath away.

Road trip: A view from the top

Vacation week meant a 781-mile journey from Texas to an idyllic cabin halfway up Pike’s Peak, CO, and an exhilarating 19-mile drive to the very top.

Road trip: Dallas to Durango and back – Part 1

Getting there really is half the fun, as Mark Macesich rediscovered traveling through the Texas Panhandle, a corner of New Mexico and on to Victorian-era Durango, CO.

Road trip: From Dallas to Durango and back – Part 2

A detour from Durango across the Continental Divide to Colorado Springs led to rocky hiking trails, buffalo burgers and a vista full of hot air balloons.

  Florida

A road trip to Destin, FL, white-sand beaches and seafood

Leaving Dallas late on a Friday and arriving at Destin’s Another Broken Egg Café for breakfast the next day kicked off a vacation of sun, sand and surf.

  Georgia

An Atlanta road trip filled with meaning and new memories

It was a last-minute trip to see far-away family, and some interesting stops were called for. They included a small southern town with a large historical impact on the Civil Rights Movement – Selma, AL.

Road trip: Visiting the South – Georgia and South Carolina – Part 1

Picked up at Augusta, GA, a Chrysler Town and Country proved the perfect vehicle for a road trip into the Deep South.

Road trip: Visiting the South – Georgia and South Carolina – Part 2

Getting from Augusta, GA, to Aiken, S.C., was easy, and opened the door to a town with an equestrian feel, charming shops and stylish restaurants.

Road trip: Visiting the South – Georgia and South Carolina – Part 3

A road trip from Aiken to Charleston, S.C., via Orangeburg, is gorgeous, and makes you dream of moving to a secluded corner of the Deep South.

  Iowa

Road trip: On a mission to West Bend, Iowa

The mission was completing a long journey home for a family reunion, with familiar sights, smells and tastes en route.

  Missouri

Lively steps and lilting tunes in Branson

A thriving country music scene, great dining, plenty of entertainment and beautiful mountains can be found in and around Branson, MO.

Route 66 still kicks in cities across America

Roll along a section of iconic Route 66 – The Mother Road – in southwest Missouri, and visit Springfield, “The Birthplace of Route 66.”

  North Carolina

Road trip: A letter from Camp Rockmont

LaQuenda Jackson and her son were not prepared for the beauty of North Carolina and the majestic mountains around Asheville – the perfect place for a summer camp.

  Oklahoma

Road trip: Going to Guthrie

Thirty miles north of Oklahoma City and 234 miles from Dallas lie Guthrie, a quaint town and former capital of Oklahoma, and the nearby Cimarron River Canyon.

  Tennessee

From eagles to Elvis: Experience West Tennessee

For Andrew Berry, one U.S. road trip destination stands above all others. West Tennessee offers Reelfoot Lake, a must for nature lovers, the Memphis music scene, National Civil Rights Museum, Shiloh National Military Park and more.

  Texas

Road trip: Beaucoup bats and battered dishes in Austin, Texas

There’s no shortage of attractions in and around the Lone Star State capital, from water activities in Lake Austin, Lake Travis and the quieter swimming holes to an acclaimed restaurant and bar scene.

Road trip destination: Floating down the Guadalupe River

Floating gently down the Guadalupe River has to be a state pastime in Texas, and it’s a great way to relax and cool off when summer temperatures start to climb.

Road trip: Going to Galveston a family tradition

The Gulf-shore beaches of Galveston are a quick, affordable getaway for many Texan families, just five hours by road from the likes of Dallas in north Texas.

Road trip: Living large in the Lone Star state

Texas is a land where everything is known to be bigger, and that even extends to convenience stores. Enter Buc-ee’s, laying claim to being the world’s biggest, located off I-35 near New Braunfels. It’s what road trips are made of.

Road trip: My adventure from North Carolina to Dallas, Texas

Graduating from the University of North Carolina and starting work in Dallas, TX, led to a memorable 19-hour drive through multiple states, time zones and temperatures for Matt Holman, with a welcome break in New Orleans.

Road trip: San Antonio and back in three days

Fort Worth to San Antonio is 249 miles, making a three-day family road trip, with a day spent at San Antonio’s Sea World, very doable.

  Road trips by theme

  Summer vacation

Road trip season has arrived

To kick off summer season travels, here’s a selection of U.S. road trips recommended by Lonely Planet.

Road trips: The cure for ‘summertime blues’

A little interstate cruise can prove to be therapeutic, not to mention a fascinating and fun way to explore this big ol’ country.

Summer road trip ideas from the experts

From outdoorsy to bucket-list to weekend trips, take a look at these point-to-point road adventures recommended by experts at Kayak, USA Today, Skift, Outdoor Magazine and more.

  Spring break

When is spring break? Dates, destinations and details to help plan your trip

Check college spring break dates with this comprehensive list, and see top spring break destinations around the U.S.

5 Road trip destinations for spring break 2016

From East Coast to West Coast, we’ve compiled some of the best beachy and city-focused spring getaways.

Top 8 road trip cities for spring break 2015

Vegas, Miami, Daytona Beach … the list goes on and the bright lights await you.

Road trip America – It’s about the experience

For many, whether they’re of school age, in their college years or a parent, spring break is synonymous with memory-making road trips.

  National parks

America’s greatest road trips: U.S. National Parks

Some of America’s very best road trips are to and through national parks, like Acadia in Maine, Big Bend in Texas and the Everglades in Florida. Find out what to see and do, and what’s nearby.

  City breaks

Top 8 road trip cities of 2014

Get inspiration from some of the most popular road trips posted on the internet, and details of what makes them special.

  Valentine’s Day

Romantic road trips to make Valentine’s Day miles better

Why not turn Valentine’s Day into a weekend excursion? These scenic suggestions with interactive maps will help you plan it.

  What to pack

10 Essentials for a road trip back to that college campus

No one wants to arrive on campus after the annual road trip only to realize they left an essential sitting on the nightstand. Read this infographic before you go.

Tips for traveling with pets

If you’re road tripping with a pet for company, these tips on what to pack and how to handle the journey will smooth the way.

What to pack for a college sporting event road trip

Traveling to a rival school for a sports game is a decades-old tradition, and packing the right stuff should be part of it if you want to make the most of the experience.

  What to eat

Road trip: Food for thought when you’re traveling

Food is a way to embrace the experience of travel, and Sonny Bynum’s recipe for a tasty road trip includes old faithfuls, new classics and local flavor.

Road trips and restaurants: Eating your way across America

Check out AAA-inspector restaurant recommendations that are definitely worth a stop.

  What to listen to

The top 38 summer road trips songs

Our melting pot of tunes, like all good mixes, features a wide variety. Browse the selection and hear our summer road trip playlist on Spotify.

Another awesome summer road trip playlist – 33 more tunes for the road

Wait, there’s more! This compilation includes recommendations from RoadLoans’ Facebook and Twitter followers to get your head bobbin’ on the road once again.

  How to prepare your vehicle

Summer is here. Is your vehicle ready?

Beware of potential frustration on the road. Prepare for happy travels with these nine summer car-care tips.

Roadside emergency & car safety kit list

It’s good to be prepared for anything that comes your way on the road. An emergency kit, and some safety steps, may prevent your road trip turning flat.

  More travel tips

Holiday road trip

See a dozen great ways to prepare for a holiday season automobile adventure in this infographic, from thinking like a Boy Scout to keeping the kids busy.

Safe winter driving tips for the holidays and beyond

Driving in the winter can be scenic, but also dangerous. Travel safely with these tips for vehicle preparation, what to bring, driving in snow and more.

Road trip: AAA advice on hitting the roads safely this summer

Don’t be one of millions of motorists stranded on the roadside when you should be vacationing instead.

  from RoadLoans Auto Blog | RoadLoans http://ift.tt/2tcrlGl via IFTTT