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naernon · 7 years ago

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OC Questionnaire - Estryon Thramian

Found this in my drafts, and decided to finish off what I had to distract from the tediousness of trying to decide what to do with the aspect of his backstory mentioned earlier. I filled this out according to how he was at the very start/before the events of Skyrim, unless stated to be what happens later on.

Feel free to use this for your own OCs, I don’t mind.

TW; Mentions of pregnancy (of a trans man). Also, some NSFW implications.

GENERAL

Name: Estryon Thramian

Alias(es): Estre is a little nickname Ondolemar took to using later on. Arelnian, the parent who carried him and the only one he met (they died when he was two, his father died prior to his birth), also called him this. It is also his birth-name. Perhaps a bit of projection on my part. I don’t mind my birth-name. (altho it could just be because if i do mind it, i’m in for bad time from it)

Gender: Male.

Age: 25 years old.

Place of birth: Sunhold, Summerset Isle. Or rather, Alinor. Morning Star 19th, 4E 176 (The Ritual)

Spoken languages: Tamrielic and Altmeri. Unsure exactly how native languages vs the common tongue works in TES, but I’ll just assume/HC it’s either like Latin (commonly taught but not used in every-day conversation) or just very secondary compared to Tamrielic. So that’s the status on his knowledge of Altmeri. Also had a minor interest in Ayleidoon when he was younger, so he knows some basic vocab, but not too much. Like you know how some people go through HS and take the entirety of Spanish/German/Whichever for the full four years and as soon as they graduated they forgot all of it? That’s Estryon with Ayleidoon.

Sexual orientation: Gay.

Occupation: Thalmor agent. Mainly used in assassinations and to stoke the conflict in the Skyrim Civil War by framing (in murder, accusations of law-breaking, etc.), propaganda, etc. Prior to that, as I’ve recently elaborated, he was a member of a elite force in Summerset called the Accipiters. They’re, as said, are similar to the First AD’s Eyes of the Queen, except with more brutality and tendency to murder. They are charged with cutting down all heresy and resistance against the Thalmor in the Isles through more silent and undercover tactics. Through whatever course of events I settle with, he is suspended and demoted within the Accipiters and sent to Skyrim to work as, again, a basic Thalmor agent for the time being. It’s not like he’s put into a useless job. Thalmor forces in Skyrim, according to this , are rather stretched thin, and with someone as combat skilled as Estryon, his work is much, much needed. Doesn’t mean he likes it, though. He hates it.

APPEARANCE

Eye color: Vibrant yellow/amber.

Hair color: Pale cream/blonde color.

Height: 6′ to 6′3/4. Haven’t decided.

Scars: Slight slashes/cuts on his right cheek and a scar on his right bicep. Likes to use… risky methods in his assassinations because he’s a dumbass and that has given him a few severely close calls on fatal weak spots; there’s a medium-length scar across his left abdomen, a shallow, light scar on his collarbone (was an attempt at his heart), and a few small ones on his thighs.

Burns: No major ones, but a lot of little burn marks because 1.) He sucks at cooking and 2.) Little mishaps in destruction magic usage.

Overweight: No.

Underweight: No.

FAVOURITE

Color: Yellow.

Hair color: He likes lighter hair colors but it’s not a huge factor.

Eye color: Yellow, but as said, not too much of a preference.

Entertainment: Horse-back riding. Causing general issues and difficulty for those around him. Taking care of horses. This man really likes horses. He also has a fondness for burning different stuff he finds, some of that stuff being important shit to someone other than him. There’s one major entertainment he commits to a lot but I’ll leave that unmentioned for modesty’s sake.

Pastime: This dude really does not do a lot to entertain himself other than [censored]. He spends a lot of time meandering and wandering and just.. being there. Either that or he rapidly switches between different pastimes because he can’t stay with one for the life of him. (he gets bored very, very easily) But. If anything, as said, he likes to experiment with magic and alchemy, and he loves horseback-riding and taking pleasure rides. This easy tendency towards boredom leads to recklessness and an unhealthy lust for thrill and adventure.

Food: As typical of Sunhold natives, he gravitates towards sea-food and he likes crab. Not typical mudcrabs from just anywhere, however. As is common knowledge, there are a lot of different varieties of Mudcrabs and there’s one particular off the coast of Sunhold that is high-demand and very flavorful. But other than that, he has a guilty sweet tooth in general, and he B U S T S A N U T for vanilla ice cream.

Drink: He’s boring. He just likes water. He enjoys some lighter alcohol, though, and perhaps some tea, but again. Water.

Books: Enjoys magic studies and books. Doesn’t like a lot of heavy-information stuff other than that, though, but he does like a bunch of light interests like aromatics and alchemy. He has Arelnian and their large array of aromatic/alchemy books + store to thank for those two interests.

HAVE THEY

Passed university: Yes.

Had sex: Pft. Yeah.

Had sex in public: Depends. Like, straight up banging in like, a marketplace? Nah.

Gotten pregnant: No. Not during the events of Skyrim, at least. Not until much later.

Kissed a man: Yes.

Kissed a woman: Yes, once or twice.

Gotten tattoos: Yes. Little ones. He has an eagle wing on each side of each of his ankles, and the Dominion emblem on the back of his neck. All hurt like Hell (especially the Dominion emblem one) and he’s kind of halted off of getting any after that.

Gotten piercings: Ear piercings, yeah. He typically likes small gold hoops or little jewels, but he tends to go through long periods of time where he doesn’t have any in.

Been in love: Yes.

Had a broken heart: Oof. Yeah.

Stayed up for more than 24 hours: Yes. He oftentimes has trouble sleeping. Has been that way since he was little, according to Ohtehil, at least.

ARE THEY

A virgin: Pft. No.

A cuddler: Not really, but, I mean. He’s not beyond it. He’s just not a very personal person in general.

A kisser: Yes.

A smoker: Not frequently, no.

Scared easily: Not typically, and even if he is, he takes care to not show it. He might flinch and recoil and you can get a little bit of a gasp from him but other than that, no. Unless it’s something incredibly outlandish or unnatural or… terrifying. Like a dragon. A large, ebony black dragon with red eyes flying from the mountains and passing over you, rumbling the ground and triggering all your fight or flight instincts. Yeah. Kinda scary. (but even then all he did was dive out of sight and hide underneath a little rock overhang. he may have taken a bit of a tumble in the process but i’ll have you know his cold altmeri exterior ™ was still in-tact)

Jealous easily: Gods, yes. He wouldn’t let that be known, however.

Trustworthy: Absolutely Not

Dominant: In terms of personality, yeah. He hates being told what to do, he thrives on spiting others, and while he is quite reserved and quiet he still manages to be…. over-bearing and dominant. He has three very particular methods of getting what he wants and one of them is a glare that could kill and keeping all words to the minimum, while also having those words cut sharp. Does that make sense? He’s one of those people that just have an overpowering presence without the need to speak. That’s one reason he doesn’t have a lot of friends, really. Anyways. One other method is straight-up killing whoever he wishes to and the other… Well. If you’re talking dominance in bed, he adapts to what is needed, wanted, or what he’s in the mood for. Whatever leaves his target vulnerable to a swift kill, framing, or easy investigation of possible heresy/conspiracy. So yes, actually, I guess he is dominant. Quite so.

Submissive: In any other context other than the Spicee (tm) one, no, not really. If in that context, then, only if he wishes to be.

Single: Yes, no committal relationship until later. Although, there was one earlier, but I haven’t developed it completely. I’ll give a little peek. It was with Thalmor Agent Sanyon. That dead Thalmor, at a Talos shrine? Yeah. High-school sweethearts, if you will. Estryon finding Sanyon’s body at the shrine, or rather, going there at all ultimately sets the course of the events of the main questline. That little event, along with Ohtehil’s little ‘turn-into-a-werewolf-and-slaughter-all-your-colleagues’ theatrical go hand-in-hand in starting it all. Estryon finding Sanyon dead would not have happened at all if not for Ohtehil, actually.

RANDOM QUESTIONS

Have they harmed themselves: Minor things.

Thought of suicide: Yes.

Attempted suicide: No.

Wanted to kill someone: Yes.

Actually killed someone: Yes.

Ridden a horse: Yes. He’s quite the horseman.

Have/had a job: Yes.

Have any fears: He isn’t too fond of heights. Or blood.

FAMILY

Sibling(s): Ohtehil (22 years older) and Tretlas (55 years older).

Parents: Arelnian and Ciryarel Thramian. Both fought in the Great War/First War of the Empire on the Dominion’s side. Ciryarel was a skilled mage who worked rather high up in the Dominion and Arelnian was also well-respected as an informant and recruiter stationed primarily in Hammerfell. Ciryarel perished in the final battle and Arelnian received significant injury. Survived two years post-War, but a highly weakened immune system as a result of the injuries ultimately cost them their life.

Children: No. Later, however, he does adopt Lucia and Sofie and does have Diatres, his only biological child.

Pets: Cyrel, a smokey black and sleek Summerset-bred mare. Had her imported upon the discovery he would be suspended in Skyrim for longer than anticipated. Prior to that, she was being boarded for a rather expensive price over at the Sunhold stables. And then Umaril, a “Pocket” Salamander. Ohtehil got it for him for his 9th birthday not anticipating a long lifespan nor the HUGE size they grow to be. Once it started growing alarmingly fast and large Ohtehil figured as long as Estryon was enjoying himself it would be fine; once he grew older he could get rid of it if he tired of taking care of such a massive and intelligent creature. Estryon did not get rid of it. Quite the opposite. He’s the dude to have a suspiciously large bag being lugged around and you see him stop once he’s in the clear, unzip it, and suddenly his dog or in this case a very large monitor pokes his head out. His commitment to Umaril and Cyrel is incredible compared to his dedication towards actual people.

#long post #oc talk #oc; estryon #skyrim

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elfstuck · 7 years ago

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Kitten Abduction

Rose checks her laptop; discovers her pesterchum account has been used; doubts it was the bubble-blowing salamander in her room.

She goes to leave her room to find John, and notices, for some reason, that The Door Is Ajar. But John was here recently, so that’s not noteworthy at all, right? Of course. (Chibipaw, wtf? Where is Rose? Wait; it must be her room; there’s the meowmeowmeow writing all over the wall. John was in her room? I thought they hadn’t been physically near each other yet. Obvs I have forgotten more than I thought.)

A bucket of candy promptly falls on her head, which John had carefully balanced on the slightly-open door. She acknowledges John as Prankster Supreme for this gimmick.

Elsewhere, John has completely missed that Rose is awake, and is going to rocket himself to somewhere no-doubt deadly.

And what do you take with you on a dangerous trip through ogre territory with a rocketpack? A mutant kitten, of course. John abducts Rose’s familiar in an attempt to force a connection between them so that Rose can rescue him later when he inevitably crashes to his near-doom.

Well, okay, the text doesn’t say that part, but I can figure out what’s going on.

Wheeeee!

This where I remind people that I have a Land of Light and Rain dragon for Flight Rising:

John zips through the air, and Rose’s pale silhouette watches him fly.

Two things happen:

1) Rose is not amused at John’s antics.

2) The salamander acquires a name: Viceroy Bubbles Von Salamancer.

Next is a POV shift back to Dave, who is going to “be the puppet.” This sounds like a Li’l Cal thing. I don’t want to deal with a Li’l Cal thing right now.

FWIW, I remember why I stopped blogging regularly. At first, I composed posts in Tumblr’s post window. And then I lost one or two of them to some combination of Tumblr’s horrible UI and my inexperience with the platform - hitting the wrong button, hitting the back key at the wrong time, stuff like that. So I went looking for other options, and I found the Lazarus Form Recovery plugin for Firefox, which remembered what you’d put in text boxes. Hooray!

And then it stopped working on an update of Firefox, dammit.

So I started composing posts in a separate program - TED Notepad, which has a few features that basic Notepad doesn’t. Only if I just typed in paragraphs, and pasted them into Tumblr, what I got was all one paragraph with line breaks. So I added basic HTML - at the start/end of paragraphs, for italics and for bold, and PIC(NAME-OF-IMAGE) for images I wanted to insert, because I couldn’t do the HTML for those until I’d uploaded them to Tumblr.

Then I’d start a tumblr post, switch it from standard text to HTML, paste in the post, switch back, and find the picture ID lines and replace those with the actual pictures.

If you think this sounds like a pain, you’d be right! And so it stopped being “read blog, make some notes on the side, grab a few pics as I go, and hit post!” and became this elaborate thing where I had several windows/apps open at once (MSPaintAdventures, TED notepad, Paint to screencap moving images and crop them down to the useful parts, one of the GifExploder websites for those gifs where I wanted one particular piece) and ugh. Was terrible.

I’m composing this in the tumblr window, knowing it might collapse on me. Suggestions welcome.

I’m seriously considering sliding back to Firefox 52. Or hell, all the way back to something that would let Word Count Plus work. Or switching over to Opera because I’m not going with Quantum. Bleh.

#john egbert #homestuck #homestuck liveblog #rose: not the sane one #mutini #elf meets trolls #act 4

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heyhowyadoingpally · 8 years ago

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it’s been so fuckin long since our first installment of this series. at the rate we’re going i’ll get through the first ten pokemon by the time another game comes out. and that means more pokemon to cover. ew, i know.

since i went over the first starter evolution previously, time to go ahead and plow through the next starter like a combine harvester on the fields during a calm and early sunday morning.

#004 - Mega: Charmander Evolution

#004 - Charmander

the starters are supposed to all be, like, the basic elements, right? bulbasaur is supposed to be grass/earth, squirtle is water, and charmander here is fire. i gotta admit, i like the name. charmander’s name is obviously a combo of “char” and “salamander”. it just works. i mean, i think it does? i might be fuckin wrong but salamanders were once associated with fire in some culture’s mythology? greek? roman? native american? i don’t remember. but it’s somewhere.

according to the pokedex entry on this lil guy, if the burning flame on his tail gets snuffed, he’s dead. like, straight-up dead. and yet you see people pit their wimpy charmanders up against hulkin water-type monsters whose abilities cause tsunamis capable of wiping out an entire nation. charmander is a goddamn resilient little fucker.

i like his overall design - simplistic, yet iconic. he doesn’t have too much going on, which makes sense since he’s the first stage of a starter evolution. he’s like a lil baby. except this baby knows how to fucking suplex you into mount doom, all the while pissing all over the eye of sauron because he can.

i might have exaggerated on that one. maybe he could spit on sauron, but his piss stream wouldn’t reach that far.

#005 - Charmeleon

alright, alright. i’ll just go out and say it: charmeleon looks like that older brother who says he’ll do the dishes and then immediately goes out with his buddies.

like, i appreciate that they’re still going for subtlety with his design, but it doesn’t quite reflect the name. don’t get me wrong - the parasolophoid crest-thing going on is prett similar to some real-world chameleons, but maybe just make his tail slightly curl up like a chameleon’s? idk. if you’re gonna name it after a reptile who lives in the trees and eats bugs, at least show it in the design.

and, another thing i just want to get out there: we all know what he turns into, and how that fucker has wings. but the you’d thinkt hat maybe charmeleon here would have maybe like lil bumps on his back where wings are forming, or perhaps just small weak lil flippyflaps? it just seems weird that the final stage of this evolution has wings yet the middle and first stages lack such appendages.

i don’t want to say i hate it, tho; the fact that his skin is a lot darker and his “cute” features aren’t as prevalent are a nice touch. i think i said this enough, but i love subtlety and realism. when it shines, it shines good, especially here. the previously-stated features i like make charmeleon seem like an adolescent of his species. i don’t know how many times i can say i love when that happens without becoming a redundant recluse.

i just wanted to throw alliteration at the end. so sue me.

#006 - Charizard

the final stage in the charmander evolutionary line (much like in bulbasaur’s) is badass.

even the name (which doesn’t seem to really fit his appearance, either) reeks of badassery. charizard. just saying it out loud makes you feel the adrenaline enter your bloodstream and cause the greatest orgasm known to mankind. HNNNNNNGH. YEEAHH. THAT’S RIGHT FUCKERS. I JUST CREAMED IN MY FUCKING PANTS.

this motherfucker is your standard dragon, but it’s a fuckin great dragon. i mean, it’s kind of a given that the first fire starter in the games would be a dragon, but it looks so fucking good. it’s a shame that it doesn’t reflect much of the “lizard” qualities in its name. idk. give him a big ol long licky tongue or smth. it’s a shame it has such a badass name yet the badass design doesn’t reflect it.

badass. blah blah blah. i’m very tired.

and, just so nobody blabbers to me about it, yes, i’m aware that charizard isn’t a dragon-type. i can understand why this didn’t happen, honestly. they probably didn’t know if the first two games would even sell as much so they didn’t want want to make a dragon type just for one pokemon. or something.

charizard’s mega evolutions differ from ivysaur’s in that instead of having just one evolution for both games that get released, charizard has fuckin two, one for each game.

Mega Charizard (Pokemon X)

ugh. i mean, it looks like a mega evolution, but it just seems a little bit on the “”””edgy”””” side for my dumb baby tastes. just a little.

however, i will say that giving him a darker color scheme does a better job at keeping the “char” part in his name. since, y’know, when things char, they typically turn black.

the fire being blue is a nice touch, too. it implies that he’s one hot momma older, and therefore has hotter flames. maybe if a charizard turns into this at its last years of life and it blows up bc of too much heat? think of when godzilla went through a meltdown, but not as large and not as cool-looking.

i just hope that the mega from pokemon y looks almost as interesting as this fella. maybe even better. but i doubt it since pokemon likes to pander towards the edgy fanbase it h-

Mega Charizard (Pokemon Y)

I TAKE BACK WHAT I SAID THIS IS NOT EDGY, THIS IS THE OPPOSITE OF EDGY. WE HAVE BEEN BLESSED.

sorry. had a stroke for a second.

this is just-.....he’s....

he’s fuckin fantastic.

if there was an evolutionary line after charizard, i’d sure as hell want this fucker to be next. he looks like an elder charizard. like, the leader of some sort of charizard group. the three crests make so much sense to me. like, charmander had no crest, charmeleon had one, and then charizard has two.

the wings???? they look slightly damaged, as if years of fights and flights have wore down the edges. this fucker has seen shit, and he annihilated the PISS out of that shit,

the tail??? a bigger flame, naturally. the older it gets, the bigger the flame? i don’t know. i’m a little peeved that they didn’t make his flame blue as well for the sake of making him seem also powerful, but i can understand the aesthetic choice.

what i would have personally liked to see is the two megas switch color schemes. i personally think it would have worked a lot better in their favors.

in fact, hold on. i’m gonna see what this would have looked like.

(source)

this looks a lot better than i thought it would have. fuck. @nintendo reboot ur games just for the sole purpose of this factor. i don’t care if i have to wait 10 years for garbodor to pop up in another game. this is a fuckin masterpiece.

RATING:

4.5/5 venonats. where they shine, they shine like a goddamn gold nugget. and that’s pretty much everywhere. mostly.

my only gripes are that they could have done a somewhat better job making the pokemon reflect their names.

be sure to tune in....whenever....when i review the squirtle evolution line.

PREVIOUS POKEFART: Bulbasaur Line

NEXT POKEFART: Squirtle Line

#pokefart reviews #charmander #charmeleon #charizard #mega charizard x #mega charizard y

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writingissues · 8 years ago

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13. "I lost our baby" for Gajevy please? Extra points if said 'baby' is something/someone they are responsible for during a mission or an assignment. Thanks so much! Love your writing!

I lost our baby | Thank you for the wait, I hope this is to your enjoyment. And thank you I’m happy you enjoy my writing. >//<

Gajeel was fucked; it was the onlyword in the entire situation that basically summed up what happened. He wasfucked, extraordinarily fucked that if this happened to someone else (likeSalamander) he would be taking great joy in their plight. But oh not now, notever he swore to himself as he stood in the middle of a park as kids ran pastand around him, except for the one kid that he needed to be there, Asuka.

He had lost Asuka, the pride of theguild since, for now, she was the only child to be raised in it for decades.The pride that brought the guild some joy during the seven years it seemed likehalf of the guild disappeared into thin air. And somehow he and Levy gotsuckered in (or well Levy accepted before he even processed what was asked ofthem) babysitting her and before he knew it they were at the park and Levy hadleft for a moment, to get some ice cream or some treat Asuka kept harassingthem over during their “walk” to the said destination.

And the next second the brat haddisappeared into the park. Which normally wouldn’t be an issue but

It seemed they picked a day thatsome kid was having a birthday party, which explained why the ordinary emptypark was now fill to the brim. Even with that it should have been easy to spother even then since she wore that cowgirl (not boy Gajeel learned thehard way with a kick to his shin for that) but also seemed, and confirmed thatwhatever God there was hated him, since it was also an old western party soevery kid had some ridiculous hat on. The dragon slayer couldn’t even smell thedamn kid from whatever rancid food they were serving or whatever that made hiseyes water, it was like everything that could go wrong was doing so in underten seconds, all he would need now was for Levy to come back and kill him,though maybe that wouldn’t be too bad considering the kid’s parents lovedmagical guns.

Quickly he surveyed they area asfast as he could, it was such a small place how could he have lost sight ofher?! Shit, this was embarrassing on many levels.

“Gajeel?” he felt himself jumpslightly which caused Levy’s brown eyes to widen at the unusual action as shelooked at him when he finally turned to her. Sweat had developed on his face ashe swallowed going back to his usual expression as Levy brows furrowed as hereyes narrowed, her hands would be on her hips if not holding the ice cream thatAsuka so desperately wanted just minutes (which seemed like hours now) before.“Gajeel…” Levy started, licking her lips, “where’s Asuka?” god damn it shewas perceptive.

“Playin’.” he blurted or as much assomeone like him could as he smiled, “she’s Playin’ with some kids she found.”God he knew she wouldn’t buy it but maybe would give him a few moments toexplain how exactly he lost the kid and it wasn’t his fault! That cowboy coupleshould teach their damn kid to not run off! During these thoughts Levy’s eyeswiden as she dropped the ice cream her mouth open and her fingers twitchingbefore finally curling into a fist.

“You LOST our BABY?!” she shoutedbefore turning away from him and going through the crowd without giving him asecond look as he followed her looking stunned. He could hear the script magemuttering to herself as she then would yell out Asuka’s name, Gajeel of coursewas helping he had more to lose in this than anything, but something about howshe didn’t even notice the slip of the tongue or the fact that she was havingsome of those same thoughts as he was, of course as of now he wouldn’t admitit, but as his red eyes scanned the crowd that seemed to finally be diminishinghe spotted the target. Gajeel didn’t even tell Levy he found her beforesprinting off only for Levy to notice as she was about to turn and ask him whatthe hell happened, her chest heavy and dropping, it seemed, into her stomachwhen the realization of what he was doing finally hit her making the smallwoman sprint right after him feeling tears gather into her eyes when shefinally reached them, Gajeel standing before the young girl who had tears inher eyes as she sat on the swing, seemed like they weren’t the only ones thatpanicked.

“Asuka” she breathed out he hands onher chest as she walked closer to the young girl bending down so they were oneye level before Levy took her into a hug, “what were you thinking leavingGajeel? That was wrong.” she scolded as she pulled away her hand touchingAsuka’s soft and tear stained cheek as she nodded.

“Didn’t mean too.” she whispered asnew tears welled up and Levy sighed as she felt Gajeel’s hand on her own head andthen watching as he squatted next to them as he looked at Asuka with a seriousexpression she only saw a few times during the time they were in the council,her heart skipped a beat watching as his normally rough and gruff voice turnedmuch softer as he then began to scold her in his own way.

“Mean too or not ya shouldn’t havedone that, almost gave us a heart attack. “but as he noticed her eyes shine hegave her a small smile, “we won’t tell ya parents if ya don’t, does that soundokay?” and it seemed just like switching of a light Asuka beamed at him a hugesmile across her face and her eyes shining like it had a stars in it.

“Yes!”

It usually went against what Levywould usually do but after those terrifying fifteen minutes it seemed, thescript mage agreed as she nodded her head smiling. “Why don’t we make apromise, a pinky promise all of us then?” and she felt her chest swell seeingthe excitement on the young girls face as they tried to do a three way promisewhich ended in more laughter before finally sealing it. “Now why don’t we getsome ice cream!” laughing as they stood up holding hands with Asuka in themiddle, no way was she getting out now.

Not long after that Bisca and Alzackpicked her up at their apartment, thanking them over and over since it was along needed date night for them, Asuka was soundly asleep in Alzack’s arms whenthey finally shut the door, the living room was a wreck but despite the terrorearlier Levy felt a bit of sadness then.

“Our baby, huh?” the blue hairedwoman stiffened her eyes widening as it seemed she finally realized what shesaid hours earlier, turning slowly to look over her shoulder and expecting tosee Gajeel wearing his usual teasing smirk that occupied these type ofsituations but surprisingly he wasn’t a more softer look he had as he movedcloser to her and then wrapping his arms around her pulling her back into herchest his mouth by her ear, “I don’t mind makin’ that happen for real.”

#gajevy #my fanfiction

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bsidethetrees · 8 years ago

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Of Jewelry and Misunderstandings

"You know, Natsu and Lucy went out on a date today."

No. Why would Laxus ever know that? Or care?

"Uh-huh."

"Well, I think of it as a date," Mira went on as she walked around his living room, picking up some. Somehow, he always managed to not do that. Like ever. "I mean, sure, Happy's going. And Gray. And Erza. And Lisanna. And I think Levy was tagging along too, but only because she was headed that way anyhow-"

"Uh-huh."

"But it's still definitely a date," Mira finished before glancing over at where he was stretched out on the couch, staring blankly up at the ceiling above him. "Don't you think, Lax?"

"Uh-huh."

"Of course," she kept going, because the demon always kept going, she had no off switch. "Sometimes I also like the thought of Lucy with Gray better. I mean, they're just so cute! He's always shirtless and she's always…not. It works, Lax."

"Uh-huh."

"But then Natsu, well, there's just something there, you know?"

No.

"Uh-huh."

"Any woman would be lucky to have him."

"Any woman?" he asked as, when she passed the couch, he reached out to grab her arm and hold her there. With a grin, Mirajane shook her head.

"You know what I mean."

"No, I don't."

"Not me, Lax," she said, allowing herself to be pulled down onto the couch with him. "Like…Lisanna for example."

"Mmmm."

"Or Erza. Have I ever told you about how I kinda can picture that?"

"Yes," he sighed. "Many times."

"Well, it's true. Natsu can basically be with anyone and it would work. Lucy too. They're interchangeable."

"Then why," he asked as she settled atop him, "would you waste them togheter?"

"I dunno," she admitted. "I just think they're cute. Don't you think they're cute? And I mean, the two of us are interchangeable, huh?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Lax, I could place you with tons of people."

"People?"

"Sure. Lucy-"

"What?"

"Cana-"

"No thanks."

"Freed-"

"Now you're just playing with me."

She giggled. "And I could be with tons of people too. I-"

"No."

"No?"

"No," he said with a definite tone then that made her smile, staring at him. Shifting on the couch, he held her close as he said, "We don't belong with others, demon. We belong together."

"Oh, dragon."

"It's the truth. There is no changing. For the Salamander and Lucy, fine, but me and you? Someone'd have to be crazy not to see that. Not to get that. And to think that anything could ever stand between that."

When she leaned up to kiss him, she stopped for a moment, taking a sniff. "You smell really good, dragon."

Of course he did. He'd spent an hour, at least, preparing for her arrival.

"Oy, boss," Bickslow had complained earlier that day as he sat around, watching the man get ready. "Where are you and your lady goin', huh? That you gotta get all fancy?"

"We're not going anywhere," he grumbled from the bathroom. It was right off the living room and, as he rarely had any shame, he'd left the door opened while he got ready. He was having a conversation anyways. "I do this whenever I plan on seein' my demon. She likes me spiffy."

"Spiffy, huh?" Elfman remarked from where he too was in the living room. "I always struck Mira as, I dunno, liking her guys manly."

Freed was there too, actually in the bathroom, helping decide on which cologne to go with that night. To his idol, he whispered, "Why is he here again?"

"The demon's orders," Laxus grumbled in response. "I gotta hang out with him twice a week."

"And if you don't?"

"Then I don't get the demon's little twice a week present."

Freed blinked. "She buys you things, I take it?"

"Oh, she does a lot more than buys me things."

"I don't-"

"Just drop it," he growled then, figuring the other guy was purposely trying to misdirect him. "And pick one already. Which smells better?"

"Well, what are the two of you doing today?"

"Hmmm. Probably laying around the apartment, having her cook me something, and then screwing or something. Why? Does that affect anything?"

"No," he said as he handed the guy one of the cologne bottles. "I was just trying to figure out if I was going to be allowed to stay or-"

"No, Freed," he grumbled. "You and Bickslow are going out together, I thought."

"If we have to-"

"We have to," Bickslow called from the other room. "I'm feelin' frisky! Let's get risky!"

"Frisky," his dolls that roamed around sang. "Risky."

"Yeah, you're taking him the hell out of my apartment soon," Laxus said, glaring out the doorway and over at the couch. "You idiot."

"Oy, boss, you're hurting my feelin's! I-"

"Not you," he growled at Bickslow. "Him."

Craning his neck, Freed glanced out there to. "Um…Elfman?"

"Hmmm?"

"Are you…stealing things from Laxus?"

"Of course not," he grumbled from where he was, over at the man's coffee table, shoving something in his pocket. "Men don't steal!"

"Then what are you-"

"It's Ever's," he said as Laxus just glared over at him.

"What is it?" he asked. "And Bickslow, he's takin' shit from my place right in front of you. The hell are you doin'?"

"Uh, boss, I'm tryin' to rest a bit before I get out there and get frisky, yeah? So maybe you can stop putting so much pressure on me-"

"Look you little helmet wearing freak-"

"It's a ring," Elfman told them all then. "She said she took it off for…for… Hey!"

"What?" Bickslow asked, cuddling back into the couch as the man suddenly got irate. "What's wrong?"

"Why," the muscular growled as he headed over to the open bathroom door, "did Ever take her ring off in your apartment, Laxus?"

"I don't know! Why would I know?"

"I am confused," Freed said slowly. "It is not a wedding ring. Just a regular ring, yes? So why would it matter where she took it off?"

"Because," he went on, "it…she… She shouldn't be taking anything off! Not here! Not with you!"

"Sheesh, I agree with you," Laxus complained before spritzing his neck. The demon liked when he smelled delicious. And he wanted to be good enough to eat. Or maybe just taste. "I've seen all of Ever that I need to, thanks. I am also very happy with the demon so-"

"You're sleeping with my sister and my girlfriend?"

"When did I say that?"

"You said it with your eyes!"

"We're not even facing one another!"

"We don't need to be!"

"For you to see my eyes? Damn straight we do!"

"You're all yelling," Bickslow complained from the living room. "While I'm trying to rest."

"Bickslow," Laxus growled then. "You are not getting frisky. At all. With anyone. Never. Not gonna happen. So get the hell over it and shut the hell up!"

"Oy, boss. That hurts."

Freed just shook his head. "Laxus, if we are going to style your hair before Mirajane shows up-"

"I have styled it!"

The other man just gave him a look. "And you're expecting something out of her tonight with…whatever it is you've done with your hair?"

"I'm trying a new look, okay?"

"And that involves…what now?"

Laxus sent the man a glare. "It's kinda, you know, a spiky, weird-"

"No." Elfman lost his edge for the moment. "It just looks like bed head."

"It's supposed to! It's messy, but not too messy-"

"It's just bad," Freed told him. "Let me-"

"No! It's my hair! And it's my apartment! And Ever's my friend, Elfman. So if I want her to strip, damn it, she will."

"What?" Bickslow was back into the conversation then. "You've been sleeping with Ever behind our backs? Freed, I'm so hurt for you. How could she do this to us?"

"He is clearly being facetious, Bick- What do you mean you feel sorry for me?"

"Well."

"Well what?"

"Well."

"What-"

"Just well, Freed!"

"I need you all out of here," Laxus said with a long sigh then. "Now. Right now. All of you. Bye, Freed. Bye, Bickslow. And Elfman, tell your damn girlfriend not to leave shit here if she can't come get it for herself."

"She won't be back here anyhow!"

"Oh, I bet she will."

"I bet she won't."

"I bet she-"

"And I bet when I tell Mirajane that you just said that you have Ever strip over here-"

"I wasn't serious! And do men go tell their sisters when-"

"No! And I was just betting. I'm not telling her. I can handle you myself!"

"Oh, you can? Really, Elfboy, you can handle this? Huh? Because I bet you can't. And I bet when I send your ass home in bandages, your precious little Ever-"

"Laxus?"

"What, Freed?" he growled, glaring over at him then.

Sheepishly, he reminded, "You're speaking to the younger brother of the woman that you're having over tonight. Just to remind you."

He had to take a moment too, to compose himself, before saying simply, "I'm not talking to anyone anymore. All of you, out."

"What? You need me to-"

"Boss-"

"We're not finished-"

"You, Elfman, before I wring your thick neck," he growled, "and you, Bickslow, before I put you in an eternal rest. And, Freed, just…stop trying to make me over! It won't work! I like my hair this way. Your help is no help at all. Just go!"

"Oy, boss, cut deep why don't you?"

"Men don't have meltdowns, you know!"

"I will go, Laxus, but honestly, do something about your hair. If only for your benefit."

"Just get out!"

And he had to cool down again, after they left. Then, when he took a second glance in the mirror, he saw just how bad his hair was and had to try again. Sigh. Those stupid…guys. Friends. Whatever they were to him. Stalkers was probably closer. For Freed and Bickslow. Constant annoyance was more Elfman's angle.

That felt like forever ago then though. At the moment, he had the demon all snuggled up real nice to him and she was sniffing him and damn if he hadn't made the right cologne choice.

"Thanks, demon," he said as she kissed his neck. "You know, I do all this for you. Always for you. I love you."

"Aw."

"You know what else I did? Just for you?"

"What?"

"In the kitchen," he began.

"Yeah? What?"

"I bought some chicken for you to fry up for dinner for us."

For some reason, she didn't seem all that excited by that.

"Is that it?"

"Of course not. What do you take me for, demon?"

"Oh." She giggled. "What else did you buy me then?"

"There's some vegetables in there too for you to cook." He held up an arm and flex. "This ain't all just meat, babe, that made this. It- What's wrong?"

She just stared at him with a crumbled face. "You said that you got me something, but all it was were things to make for you. You got my hopes all up, Lax, and then-"

"Oh, demon, don't cry." He gave her a grin before shifting. "I bought you something. Right over here. Sat it right next to the couch. On the table. And…it's not under this magazine…or by this cup…or…uh…"

"Laxus-"

"Fuck!"

"Laxus! No cursing!"

He couldn't help it. That stupid little-

"Your brother stole your gift!"

"What?"

"Yeah." Laxus gently shoved her off before moving to stand and look over the coffee table. "That stupid-"

"How did he-"

"He said that Ever left a ring or something over here," he grumbled as he checked the table, just in case. "I figured the dope would have realized that if she did, it wouldn't be in a fucking box, but apparently-"

"You bought me jewelry?"

"I bought you a ring, dummy."

"Laxus!"

Growling, he got out, "I'm sorry, demon, but I'm a little-"

"Frazzled?"

"…Sure. The point is that your brother has your engagement ring and-"

"My brother has my what?"

"Your ring! Your-"

She was standing there next to him too then, eyes wide. "Y-You bought me an engagement-"

"What other type of ring does a man buy for a woman," he growled, turning to face her. When he saw the look on her face, he just reached out to grab her face in his hands and press a kiss to her forehead. "You sexy little demon. And look, I would love to go over this in full-"

"Wait, you were going to propose just now?" She didn't sound as enthused, some of the thrill dying down. "After just asking me to make you dinner?"

"Uh, yeah. I mean, I was thinking maybe after dinner or sex or something, but-"

"You didn't…plan something? Or-"

"Plan? Demon, I bought a freaking ring. What more do you want from me?"

"Did you even tell anyone? Or talk about it? With your friends?"

"Heck no! Bickslow would have spoiled it, Ever would have hated it, and Freed would have tried to have you killed."

"He would have what?"

"Mira-"

Pushing that from her mind, she said, "I just think that you could have put some thought into-"

"Look." He patted her on the head. "I would love to discuss all this silly little thoughts in your head right now-"

"They're not silly! You should take time and plan a proposal, not just-"

"But," he went on, "I got a ring to track down."

Then he leaned down to nuzzle her head before turning to walk off.

"Laxus-"

"You stay here. I got-"

"Laxus, are you in there?"

A sudden knock at the door startled them both. Laxus just frowned.

"That sounds like Ever," Mirajane whispered. "And she sounds excited."

He paled. "You don't think-"

"I have something to show you!"

"Laxus, that woman has my ring."

"Yeah, I gathered that, demon."

"Well, get it back!"

"Gah, demon, you're about to not get it. Not even an I do yet and already you're nagging."

"Laxus-"

"I'm goiin', I'm goin'."

When he opened the door, it was to be practically tackled by Evergreen.

"What is your prob-"

"Elfman proposed to me!"

"Why the hell would you be happy about that? I'd run to the hills."

Elfman, who was behind them, just forced his way into the apartment before going over to his glaring sister.

"I messed up," he whispered.

"I know."

"No, Mira, you don't. I didn't, like, do this without telling you first if that's why you're-"

"It's not."

"Then what-"

"Mira, look!" Ever was finished with the clearly critical Laxus and headed over to her, holding out her hand. "Isn't it beautiful?"

Mirajane just stared at the ring though, mainly the diamond, hardly able to speak. "Oh. It's…amazing. Let me-"

"Yeah," Ever sighed, still showing it off. "But the band is a bit big. It's like Elf thought I had huge fingers or something."

Mirajane blinked. Then she glared at the other woman. "I'm sure that is not what he thought."

"I think it is. I mean, why else would he-"

"Elfman." Laxus didn't feel like getting in between the women at the moment. "Can I speak with-"

"Yes, please, let's talk!"

Laxus' glare was full of malice as they rushed off to the kitchen.

"What the hell, Elfman? You-"

"How come you didn't tell me you were proposing to Mirajane? You have to ask another man before you ask his sister to marry you. It's a thing!"

"It is not a thing," he hissed.

"It is too."

"It is not."

"Is too."

"Is-"

"And now," Elfman went on, voice low, but dark, "Ever thinks that I'm-"

"I know."

"And I'm not!"

"I know."

"I can't get married."

"I know."

"I- Wait. Why do you know that?"

"Because, Elfboy, I know that you're not good enough to marry Evergreen. You-"

"How dare you?"

"Very easily!"

"Just for that, I'm marrying her!"

"No, you're not."

"Yes, I am."

"Elfman-"

"I'm doing it!"

"Fine! I don't care! Not really!"

"Great!"

"Super! But you're not doing it with my damn ring."

"Watch me."

"Elfboy- You get back here!"

He was heading back into the living room then and, without much of a choice, Laxus headed after him.

"Hey, Ever," Elfman greeted as she grinned up at him. Laxus would admit, he'd never seen her so happy to see him before. "Me and Laxus just talked about it and, guess what?"

"What?"

"He wants to be my best man."

"No way!"

No, really, no way. Sigh. Laxus had to hand it to the lout; he wasn't as stupid as he appeared. He knew saying it in front of Evergreen cemented it in there. Gah! First he hijacked his ring, now he was punishing him too?

Since when did Elfman get the upper hand anyhow?

Now, sure, Laxus knew that he could easily burst Ever's happy little bubbles, but…even though he tried hard to hide it, he did love the Thunder Legion. They were his people. His most loyal followers (in Laxus' mind, everyone else was just a regular follower who didn't realize they were following him just yet). He couldn't hurt her.

"Demon." He went to grab her arm and pull her away from the other couple. She was still shooting daggers at Ever though. Leaning down, he whispered in her ear, "We have a problem."

"Yeah, I know. She's wearing my-"

"Not that," he said, making her glance up at her. "Look, your brother is mad at me and... What if I just buy you a new ring? Huh? You can even pick it out. Any one you want. Within reason, I mean, but-"

"No, Laxus. That is my ring and I want it!"

"Mira-"

"Ever," she called over to the other woman then, gaze still icy. She didn't want to come right out and ruin the moment or anything, but hell, she was going to have to do something. "How did Elfman…you know, propose?"

"It was so cute." She didn't sound like herself, at all, and it made Laxus wanna puke. "He pretended like he got the necklace that I left over at Laxus' for me and then just gave me this black box that was obviously a ring box and I-"

"A necklace." Laxus couldn't help it. "You were over here and you didn't get a necklace, Elfboy, you got-"

"You keep quiet, you filthy dragon!"

"Only the demon can call me dragon! And filthy."

Mirajane glanced at her boyfriend. "What context would I ever call you fil-"

"Trust me, demon, we'll get there."

"What," Ever hissed, glancing between Elfman and Laxus, "is going on?"

"Nothing," Laxus grumbled. "Just-"

"Good." She almost sounded like she was the one in control, Evergreen did. It was enough to shock Laxus into silence. "I need to go tell-"

"I can't do this, Laxus," Mira said loudly then. "I can't."

"Mira, I will get you another-"

"That is my ring and I want it!"

"You sound bratty."

"I don't care. I hardly ever want anything, but dang it, Laxus, I want my ring!"

That made Ever stop her stride to the door. Looking back over at Mirajane, she repeated, "Your what?"

"Oh geez." Elfman looked ready to faint. "Uh, Ever, did I ever show you how manly the front of Laxus' apartment building is? Let's go-"

"Who the hell would that distract?" Laxus complained. "Other than you?"

"Hey! I'm trying, okay? I-"

"What," Ever said then, looking to her boyfriend, "is going on?"

"W-Well-"

"That's my ring." Mirajane tried her hardest to look annoyed, but with her goofy bangs up in that pony tail and her usually posture, it was hard. "And I want it. Laxus bought it for me."

"He what?"

"This is what I wanted to avoid."

"Avoid?" Laxus repeated. "Elfman, you're the one that made it get this far!"

"I'm not good under pressure, alright?"

"No fucking kidding."

"Elfman." Evergreen turned to fully face him then. "What's going on? Did you not…buy this?"

"No," he admitted. "Ever, I didn't even really mean to ask you to marry me. There's so much that goes on in my head constantly."

"No kidding," Laxus grumbled.

"And I got a little mixed up," he went on. "I thought that you left a ring here, not a necklace, and I went to find it."

"You thought that she left a ring? And even put it in a box?" Even Mirajane frowned. "Elf-"

"Sometimes I don't think," he said then with a frown though he was still staring at his girlfriend. "And Ever, I never meant to hurt you, but I can't-"

"You didn't propose then?"

"No," he sighed. "I didn't."

"Oh, thank goodness." She literally about dropped then, her body become so relaxed. She even moved to pull the engagement ring right off. "Elf, I like you, like a lot, but I was already trying to plan how I was going to stand you up at the alter and still get all the wedding gifts."

His frown deepened. "You what?"

"I was excited by how nice the ring is and that you care about me, but Elfman, I can't be married. I can't even keep a pet! And I'm not a very good friend. Or girlfriend. Could you imagine me as a wife? I- Hey, Mira, you could try not-"

"It's mine," the demon said simply as she came to snatch the piece of jewelry from the other woman's hand. "So give it to me."

"Here, you stupid- Hey! Wait!" Evergreen looked to her idol then. "L-Laxus? Are you asking Mira to-"

But his eyes were completely focused on his girlfriend then, her own staring heavily down at her newest prized possession.

"Demon," he started, the sound of his voice making her look up. Coming closer with a grin, he reached out to tap her nose gently. "I screwed this all up, I know, but that's our life, you know? Everything's one big screw up after another. And most of them turn out for the better. But if you want me to try again, plan some sorta…whatever the heck you think people do for proposals, well, I'll-"

"Oh, Laxus, I can't even… Yes. To the proposal. I-"

"Well, I didn't really ask yet, but uh, demon, would you…um…well, marry me? Is that good enough? Or do you want me to ask you some other way? Because- Oof!"

Elfman snickered as Mirajane literally tackled the dragon to the ground in a way that Ever hadn't even come close to.

"I love you, dragon." Mirajane was straddling his stomach too, staring down at him with big eyes. "I just… I can't believe this! My night is perfect. It-"

"Mine is too," he breathed, grinning slightly as he stared up at her. "Other than, like, the fact that you two dopes are still here-"

"My sister is so manly!" Elfman wiped at his eyes. "She takes disappointments like a man!"

"Disappointment?" Laxus mumbled. "Wha- Hey! Are you calling me a disappointment? You stupid-"

Evergreen sniffled. "It's like watching you grow up, Laxus, finally, completely. And I just…I mean, I wish it was to someone else, but what can you do?"

He just kept glaring at Elfman. "Right back at you, Ever."

That brought her emotions back into check. Glaring at Laxus then, she walked around him and Mira and into the bathroom before returning with the necklace that she'd no doubt told Elfman about. With that in hand, she went to grab her boyfriend's other one and drag him out.

"Don't be seduced by all this though, sis." Elfman was coming back to his senses, apparently. "I don't want him as a brother."

"I won't ever be your brother," Laxus growled in response. "No matter what."

"You-"

"Goodbye, Elfman," Mira sang as she sat back some atop Laxus, though that was more to stare down at the ring she'd put on her finger. She had no idea what Ever was talking about. It fit perfectly. "See you later."

"We have some things to talk about anyhow," Ever hissed to him as they left.

"Like what?"

"Like, uh, gee, how you just embarrassed me!"

"Oh. No, I don't really feel like talking about that."

After the front door shut behind them, Laxus moved to rest his hands on Mira's hips.

"You like your ring then, I take it, demon?"

"Yes, Laxus. Oh, yes. I love it. I love you."

"And you're really going to love being my woman, huh? For real now?"

"Yes!"

"That's great." He patted her hips with a grin. "First course of action is, you know, getting to work on that dinner I was talkin' about before."

That made her smile drop some. "Are you…serious?"

"Uh, yeah, demon. My stomach doesn't just stop growlin' for special occasions." Then, reading her facial expression like a pro, he grinned sheepishly. "Err, uh, you know, I could make dinner tonight or some-"

"That would be great!" Her grin was back. Getting off him then and back to her feet, she said, "I love you."

Yeah. So long as he wasn't asking for food, apparently…

Standing himself then, he dusted himself off before reaching out to cup her cheeks. "I love you too, demon. And I can't wait to make you Mrs. Laxus Dreyar."

"Me neither," she giggled. "Mr. Laxus Dreyar."

"Although," he said as he leaned down to kiss her head, "that's mainly because I hate you sharing the same last name as your idiot brother."

"Laxus."

"Well."

#Miraxus #Elfever #Fairy Tail #Thunder Legion #Laxus Dreyar #Mirajane Strauss #Elfman Strauss #Evergreen #Fanfiction #Freed Justine #Bickslow

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ghoultyrant · 8 years ago

Text

FoZ Notes 1

In part as an attempt to force myself to finish Familiar of Zero and move on to Twig, I’m going to be posting my notes to Tumblr, one volume worth of notes per day. I can read an entire volume in a day if I don’t put it off, it’s just so stomach-churning I struggle to make myself.

We’ll see if it works.

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Familiar DETERMINES affinity. Interesting implications for crossovers. Though really it's probably more like "this is how we discover your affinity". Familiar runes take a minute to apply, uncomfortably hot. (Inconsistent whether it's "just a moment" or more on the order of a full minute) Occurs post-kiss. No explanation or justification is given for why Louise kissed Saito on the lips, rather than the forehead -I find it difficult to believe the ritual actually demands lip-to-lip contact, given some of the creatures being summoned. Louise is treated badly, openly, with authorities (Colbert, in this case) not interfering unless she pushes back. People essentially ignore Saito. Unclear if it's because he's a Familiar or because he's being interpreted as a commoner. Unclear why everyone assumes he's a commoner -how would they know he's not a mage? Louise finds it plausible Saito has never seen a few magical beasts, including griffons, by virtue of interpreting him as a commoner. Saito passed through a "sparkling mirror-like object", which was elliptical, floated above the ground, and had no thickness at all. He felt electrocuted passing through, though only mildly. Two giant moons. Louise is quick with the groinshot when Saito seems to be attempting to rape her. (Because Saito is a fucking moron) Claim that familiar contract is unbreakable. Skeptical. No commentary on whether the summoning step is too late on a physics level or just on a social level. On the social, unclear whether Louise was entrapped in general or only specifically by the fact that she'd failed repeatedly prior to summoning Saito. Louise is near-instantly convinced by a laptop. Never mind that it wouldn't be anything other than a glowy metal thingy to her, and never mind that she doesn't know all there is in the world to know... "I've never seen anything like this" she says about the glowy metal thingy. So? Proves nothing. Louise refuses to actually try re-doing the Summon Familiar spell. Cites reasons, ignores how the situation is extraordinary. Saito, being a moron, gives up instead of pointing out that if this is unprecedented they might as well try. Familiars' senses can be tapped. But not Saito's, because that would be too consistent. Inexplicably, Louise assumes that if Saito were to go home, she could summon a new Familiar, having previously insisted only death ends the contract. Possibly she's being dismissive or treating "going home" as a euphemism? Louise is disturbingly at ease with slotting Saito into the Familiar/property/object mental slot. I assumed the 'comfortable being naked around Saito' thing was some commoner/noble thing she was doing, but no, she's treating it like getting naked around a pet. Louise is quick to punish disrespect by withholding meals. Kirche has a Charmander. Flaming tail (which apparently proves it's from the Fire Dragon Mountains) and the size of a tiger. Constantly heating the area up, passively. [Note from the future: the story seems to essentially forget about her Charmander past the first couple of volumes] Oddly, dialogue implies Kirche knew her affinity was fire before she summoned her Familiar? Or just bad writing/translation. Brown/black/purple cloaks for first/second/third years. Louise and her peers are second years? Seems... odd, given the primacy of affinities. Why didn’t they summon as first years? [Note from the future: even though we only hear about three years, Louise is still in the Academy more than three years later into canon. Consistency, what’s that?] Familiars are barred from the main hall, at least during breakfast. Louise somehow requested Saito be exempted without him knowing, which seems wildly implausible. "Oh, Great Founder Brimir, and our lady, the Queen, we thank you for this humble meal that you have graciously provided us this morning," is said by all students, simultaneously, before breakfast. Somehow Kirche's Salamander can sleep underneath her chair, curled up. I thought it was as big as a tiger, minimum? Floating eyeball creature=bugbear. (??) Teacher Chevreuse is an enabler of people being horrible to Louise. As per the first teacher (Colbert), she only intervenes when Louise fights back. She at least does punish people for giggling when a student insists that Louise really is a "Zero"... The "basics" of Earth is transmutation. Not manipulation of the dirt or whatever, alchemy. Chevreuse has never worked with Louise before, and strangely is unaware of her explosive results. Just heard of her being a "hard worker". Inconsistent as to whether chanting is necessary or just "concentration" for running spells. [Note from the future: it gets worse. So much worse] Headmaster Osmond is irreverent. He's basically Perverted Straight Dumbledore. Saito is a dumbass asshole and now I know why he sees nothing wrong with how Louise is treated. Oh god. The author wants us to think Saito being an asshole is somehow noble, too. "Nobody" has been "kind" to Siesta the maid since she showed up at the castle. Saito being grateful for eating at all is some giant shock that causes her to burst into tears, because this is such a pleasant world you see. Saito hopes Guiche would just die, because he views the boy as a horrible narcissist. Glares of death, etc, leading all the way up to getting into a fight with the guy and refusing to back down. This is particularly horrible because Saito isn't exactly holding himself to monogamy on any level, so his loathing of Guiche is basically either hypocrisy or an obnoxious form of self-loathing. Guiche is also a moron, boasting openly about how he's a playboy and then immediately expecting one girl in earshot to believe she's the only one for him. Even if it weren't for Montmorency's perfume falling out of his pocket... really, Guiche? Guiche gets pissy with Saito, frames things as "two girls' reputations have suffered". What? Because you're a two-timing asshole, their reputations suffer? What kind of insane troll logic is this? Guiche's own toadies are quick to recognize that if Guiche hadn't been two-timing them, this wouldn't have happened, though, so he's maybe half-effective at spinning things, if that. So many cases of chantless casting. Saito is implied to have been made into the Gandalfr by Louise contracting him, having been genuinely ordinary before then. Suggests that whoever Louise summons and makes into her familiar becomes the Gandalfr, rather than Saito having an internal quality that makes him such. Longueville has the subtlety of a freight train. ("I'm very interested in this vault and how to break into it for entirely innocent reasons and every time the conversation moves away from that I promptly drag it back to that”) Colbert is a moron and somehow fails to figure out what's up with her. Kirche sleeps with a LOT of people. And is too stupid to avoid having three separate dates (one of which was three boys at once!) show up the same night within minutes of each other. She also frames her actions in such a way as to absolve herself of responsibility for her decisions at every step, that being a Zerbst means she's 'destined' to fall in love with people on sight and blah blah blah. I don't think the author understands how agonizing being whipped is.

Gandalfr weapon competency goes past "master-tier" and into "overtly laughing at physics" -acknowledged by the story, itself.

Kirche is very deliberate in plotting to steal Saito for the express purpose of fucking with Louise. Everyone in this story is horrible. [Note from the future: the author apparently forgets that Kirche is a horrible person and switches over to her being Louise’s best friend after Henrietta, and acts as if this was always true]

Also, Kirche bullies her "best friend", Tabitha, by using her height to keep her book away. Which isn't really anything that should work, but Kirche is still an asshole.

Yes, Tabitha has to specify to her dragon that the people they are following are not to be eaten, as a casual assertion she apparently makes on a routine basis. Yikes. [Note from the future: this never crops up again and doesn’t fit with later characterization. Consistency!]

The academy is apparently only a few hours-by-horse away from Tristain's palace.

Mages/nobles wear capes in Tristain to signify their status. Saito is stupid enough to assume that no cape=no mage.

Bizarrely, an arms dealer is quick to guess Saito is Louise's familiar on the basis of her clarifying she's buying a sword for her familiar??

Fouquet (ie Longueville) has been stealing stuff, unclear whether it's Tristain-the-city or Tristain-the-country, stated to specifically be from nobles. People know it's a mage. Later implied to be Tristain-the-country.

I like how the shopkeep is obviously long-suffering about Derflinger.

Derflinger asks if Saito is a "user" hinting that he knows or suspects Saito's nature. We're also given the impression Derflinger can't speak when sheathed. [Note from the future: Astoundingly, they actually stick to this consistently. Yes, I know, I’m amazed too]

Kirche's idea of haggling is to basically strip as the other party goes lower with their offers. She is, quite frankly, creepy.

"The royal mage guards" -implying the royal family has nobles as full-time guards?

Fouquet steals, taunts, lets everyone know it was her. Either transmutes walls into dirt/sand or summons a giant goddamn golem to smash her way in.

Somehow, Louise knows nothing about Tabitha, didn't even know she's friends with Kirche.

Fouquet can walk on walls. Probably an earth spell. [Note from the future: nobody ever do this ever again and the implications are entirely ignored]

Fouquet instantly feels Louise's explosion is unprecedented, because of course she does, can't not drop nonsensical hints that she's more than the Zero, can we?

Saito is a moron who can't imagine he can roll while tied up. Louise is a moron who can't come up with a better answer than "untie Saito" when he's tied up and about to be crushed.

Louise, in a moment of frankness, admits "no respectable" master would abandon their familiar. Interesting. Honor and duty, Louise?

Fouquet is perfectly comfortable incidentally murdering people with her golems. Wow, lady. Also, she can apparently alter the golem's composition and give it orders? Are the fans SURE characters can only run one spell "actively" at a time? [Note from the future: Yes, no, maybe, depends on the author’s mood, the position of the moon, etc. In a word? Whatever suits the story this very second]

Chevreuse was sleeping instead of on watch like she was supposed to be. Wow. Maybe Longueville did something?... [Note from the future: no, because why rite gud?]

Longueville reports herself. Guessing trap.

Osmond calls for volunteers to go after Fouquet. No teachers volunteer. Louise volunteers, because no one else did. Kirche volunteers, refusing to be shown up by a Valliere. Tabitha volunteers, because "she's worried", presumably for Kirche.

Tabitha is already a 'Chevalier', a title conferred by imperial authority and earned by merit. In short: she did something fucking AMAZING already. Osmond knew this, pretty much no one else did, Kirche included. It's the lowest such title, but whatever.

People don't count Saito as a person, seriously.

Longueville comes with... definitely a trap.

Kirche assumes that Longueville, as a mage, must be a disgraced noble, after Longueville says she's not a noble. Louise blocks Kirche attempting to dredge up whatever disgrace might have happened, because Louise is considerate and conscientious when it comes to honor.

Kirche continues to dodge responsibility for her own decisions. Indicates she only volunteered because Saito would be in danger.

The group is astonishingly professional about coming up with and implementing a plan. What are they, Naruto ninja?

Bafflingly, Kirche hitting a golem with a fireball... lights the thing on fire? What kind of clay is it made of, exactly?

Louise continuing to prove she is about Honor And Duty, also pointing out Saito's hypocrisy.

"Staff of Destruction" is a rocket launcher... and is somehow already/still loaded?? Close-range explosion fails to spray our heroes with lethal shrapnel because shut up.

The trap was so Longueville could find out how to use the rocket launcher. She monologues because shut up.

Chevaliers for everyone! Except Saito, because he's not a noble, and Tabitha because she has the rank already. [Note from the future: the author apparently completely forgets about this in later volumes, as we get a scene where Louise not getting a Chevalier title is treated as if she’s actually missing out in like Volume 15. Or maybe it was 14?]

Rocket launcher came with an unfortunate soldier who saved Osmond from a dragon.

Oh jeez. Derflinger going "clothes really do make the man!" in reference to Louise.

Louise admits she didn't REALLY believe him prior to the rocket launcher thing.

End volume 1.

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Overall plot arc: Fouquet/Longueville steals rocket launcher, is stopped.

There's also dropping hints of why the protagonists (Louise and her familiar) are the protagonists, but not much payoff as yet.

#Familiar of Zero #Notes

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