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#I think I saw Stingray say once that the interviewer is her
waiting-on-a-dream · 2 years
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What does your muse like about [character name]?
Answer to this. @sugarandmelody Asjksjkjs Sorry this took so long, I kinda forgot about it- Also, answering this put so many thoughts into my head. It's a mess, make sure to read the tags. 👍️
Iris Delmor:
"Probably the same reason she likes me," Iris giggled. "She knows how to have fun, what can I say?"
"She's got style too! We could shop all day if we wanted to, getting our nails done, gushing over high heels..." Iris flicked her hair back, eyes crinkling affectionately. "I didn't know I needed a friend like her in my life until she came crashing right in."
"And have you heard the way she talks about her siblings? She's such a caring sister, in her own way," Iris continued to smile at a certain corner of the room, but then her expression soured.
"Something wrong?" The interviewer asked.
"Hm? Oh no, I just remembered something nasty," Iris waved the interviewer off. "Any other questions?"
Slyvan Marwood:
"I think...Underneath all that anxiety, there is a kind person," Slyvan pouted a bit as he chose his words carefully. Pollux might be listening in, who knows?
"I don't know what happened to make him so... I'm sure it must have been incredibly painful," Slyvan wrung his hands together. "It's not my place to force anything on him, not even good intentions. But I hope with time...He can be happy someday?"
Slyvan laughed softly, reaching up to run his hands through his braid. "I don't really know how to answer this question. I don't actually know him that well? Um...Yeah."
Violet Delmor:
Violet scrunched up her nose, crossing her arms with a huff. "What kind of question is this? Don't you have any better questions to ask?"
"Nope," the interviewer laughed.
"You're sadistic," Violet sighed, but answered anyway. Because she's a goody two shoes.
"Pip is...Not the brightest, or the best at being organized, or- You get the point," she paused to cleared her throat.
"Despite that, she doesn't give up. She's terrible at studying, but she does it anyway. She's clumsy, but she works hard to fix her messes. She can hardly take care of herself, but she still tries to take care of other people. That kind of optimism..." Violet fiddled with her skirt, "is admirable, I suppose. I appreciate her tenacity. Compared to some of the wimps I've seen soiling the Heartslabyul name, she's already leagues above them just because of her spirit."
After finishing her little rant, Violet looked to the side, embarrassed perhaps. "Don't tell her I said that..."
Xenon Ambrose:
Xenon stared at the interviewer for a few long, awkward seconds.
"His thirst for knowledge is something I can connect over with him. And I like that he has the same social skills as me, I've always found it hard to understand most social conducts. Yes, that is all."
The interviewer raised an eyebrow. "That's all? Really?"
Upon being pressured to say more, Xenon sat back, deep in thought. "...We are quite similar to each other. In mannerisms, having travelled to many places, and...the way we cope with the things that happened in our childhood."
"I see myself in him. What I was, what I am, and what I could be, if that makes sense." It doesn't, but okay.
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kingyeoms · 5 years
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dolphin keeper!seokmin
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pairing: dolphin keeper!lee seokmin x vet!reader (n) genre: fluff word count: 1,840 a/n: this has been sitting in my drafts for forever, i’m sorry it took me so long to finally finish it!! anyways, this was such a cute concept and i’m so glad i was able to write it :’) thank you for the request!! ♡ best read on desktop, use mobile browser if you can’t read under the cut ♡
lee seokmin is the cutest funniest dolphin keeper in the universe
first fell in love with the ocean when his family went on a trip to jeju when he was eight
they were walking around the coast and seok absolutely?? was just mesmerized with the way the waves crashed against the ocean,, the beautiful tones of blue in the waves,, his big eyes peering into the water to look at the little fish swimming around ugh so precious
literally begged his parents to let him take swimming lessons as soon as he got home
and that was the start of a beautiful perfect pair: seokmin and the ocean
at first he wanted to be a marine biologist, but after a seventh grade field trip to the aquarium and seeing one of the scuba divers in the tanks with the fish, he changed his mind -- he wanted to do that!!
luckily one of his friends seungkwan, who was a sloth cuddler at the zoo, mentioned that there was an opening for a dolphin keeper position!
seokmin at the interview: “wanna see my seal impression?”
at first he was a little nervous since he had no experience whatsoever,, accidentally tripped on the fish bucket when first meeting the dolphins
but once he met gyul and podo? literal heart eyes
as soon as he saw them,, immediately wanted to get into the pool and swim with them
“seokmin wait you don’t have proper gear on” “it’s fine!! i’m willing to take the risk!!”
can you imagine him in a blue wetsuit, yellow fishing type overalls with a cute lil dolphin patch in the middle!! i’m sad
turns out, seokmin is really good with dolphins the same way he’s great with people!!
podo is absolutely enthralled with seok.. she thinks he’s soooo handsome!! always squeaks when he comes into the pool~
gyul gets a little jealous,, but he doesn’t mind since seok always sneaks him extra squid snacks
they’re his actual children, literally seokmin walking into the pool room: “where are my babies~~”
does demonstrations for elementary school kids!! he teaches them how to “speak gyul and podo’s language” and also gives a presentation on how to reduce plastic waste
honestly really cute, super endearing seeing seok and a bunch of eight year olds squeaking with the dolphins
has a bunch of drawings of him and the dolphins hung up on his fridge back home,, he always gets them in his work mailbox as thank you notes!!
okay but listen,, as great as he is with children and dolphins alike,, seokmin wasn’t necessarily the.. most careful keeper at the zoo..
to be honest, everyone was a little worried at how clumsy seok was,, but they realized how much the dolphins loved him and so they just kinda deal with it
accidentally slipped and fell into the pool while trying to get one of podo’s toys,,,, it’s fine
you, on the other hand, just recently graduated from vet school, and having interned at the zoo for years now, they offered you a job right away
you watched a ton of animal documentaries growing up!! and honestly, going to the zoo was one of your favorite things to do as a kid,,
so it was no surprise that your dream was to work with animals!! but you’ve always had a soft spot for marine life :(
your first encounter with seokmin was super brief, when you had stopped by the break room to buy some coffee,, he was soaked.. bunches of paper towels in his hands,,
poor kid was trying to dry himself with paper towels and so naturally you just offered some help
seok didn’t even notice you come in!! but when he looked over to see whose voice it was,, perhaps his heart skipped a beat or two,,
“i’m okay, don’t worry! it’s just.. i fell into the pool again and i also forgot to do the laundry so we don’t have any towels..” he rambled, his ears burning a shade of tomato red
“i’m sure we have extra towels at the clinic? and i think the others would like it if there wasn’t a huge puddle of water in the break room,,” you giggled, seok shooting you a confused look
“you work at the clinic?” “yeah, i’m the new vet”
and literally seokmin drops his paper towels and palms his forehead bc,, how tf he gonna look so STUPID in front of the new vet
also since when has the new vet been so cute?
“so,, do you still want a towel?” “please... that’d be nice”
and so that’s how seok ends up in your office for the first time, cracking stingray jokes and drying out his hair while you’re sitting on top of your desk, laughing at the very cute but clumsy dolphin keeper
you don’t really see seokmin all that much for a while, since there was a pretty bad infection going around the seals, you dedicated your time to them
but to be honest seokmin can’t get you out of his head,, he keeps thinking about the cute vet that laughs at his jokes
one day seok asks you to come to the dolphin exhibit because gyul isn’t acting like his normal self and he was absolutely worried,, ran straight to your office
turns out poor baby has indigestion :(
the reason? seok tripped when he was feeding them and the whole bucket of herrings fell straight into the pool
you, jaw dropped to the floor: “are you being serious”
seokmin: “yes listen i’m really sorry okay i tried to stop him from eating all of them but he’s just.. too fast”
you can’t help but laugh at how,, silly seokmin is!! literally the kid has a heart of gold but also legs made out of jello
the two of you are just in the pool, gyul is nuzzling you as you rub his belly,, podo is circling seokmin nervously,, he has to calm her down poor baby girl :(
but you figure out the problem, gyul just has to take some meds and go on a strict diet for the next two weeks!!
you offer to stop by everyday to check up on gyul,, in case seok needs help taking care of him or anything
you may or may not… use this.. as an excuse to see seokmin
gyul starts to grow super fond of you,, squeaking and swimming to the edge of the pool every time you walk into the room!!
but podo doesn’t like you bc she thinks you’re too close to her favorite keeper
even if you give her squid snacks,, she won’t eat them unless seok gives them to her
you’re a little bummed by it, but you know not every animal is going to fall in love with you,, it is a little hard though, especially if you’re the one responsible for their health
two weeks pass and gyul is all better, but podo is still a bit aggressive towards you,,
seokmin’s new mission: getting podo to like you!!
him: “have you thought about dressing as a clown? she’d find it funny”
you: “what”
him: “ok i guess we’ll move onto plan b?”
honestly it’s really cute it’s kind of like he’s trying to convince his little sister that his significant other isn’t a bad person
you and seokmin spend the next couple of days,, coming up with a plan in the break room during lunch
the two of you finding out more about each other along the way, sharing your love for the ocean and marine life!!
seokmin finally gets the courage to ask for your number,, the first text you get from him is a photo of him and gyul in the pool :(
honestly?? you squealed into your pillow that night LMAO
you make it routine to send him cute photos of seals and otters,, he sends you penguin memes probably
your coworkers would start to notice,, teasing you while you’re doing paperwork in your office,, nurses “i see you spending time with that cute dolphin keeper,, when’s the wedding?”
they’d tease you even more once they saw how red your cheeks would get,, because honestly, the more time you spent with seokmin, the more you realized that not only is he handsome, but he has the purest heart in the world
even if he is.. a little clumsy.. and forgetful.. he puts the animals before himself and you love that about him!!
but this was work,, there was no place for any sort of relationship here
seokmin on the other hand?? has three heart emojis next to your name on his phone
absolutely smitten with you,, knew you were the one for him when you first got into the pool, the smile on your face when gyul swam up to you,, he thought you shined brighter than the sun (as cheesy as that sounds it’s true)
he really wanted to take you to his favorite beach,, in jeju,, where he first fell in love with the ocean
but he had to ask you on a date first and honestly,, he wasn’t even sure if you felt the same way
feelings aside, the two of you come to the conclusion that you should try,, spending time with podo by yourselves, without seokmin
so for the next few days,, while seokmin was on his lunch break, you’d hop into the pool and hang out with the dolphins for a little bit!!
gyul was so happy to see you again,, but podo distanced herself a bit from you,, staying in the corner of the pool until seokmin came back
until one day,, gyul was in a different pool for training, and it was just you and podo,,
and you figured,, might as well try one more time,, holding out her favorite squid snack
slowly but surely,, podo came to you, taking the squid snack,, even letting you pat her head!!
you were absolutely over the moon, because after months of hostility,, this was the first time podo had ever let you pet her,,
as soon as seok came back from his break,, you threw your arms around his neck,, telling him that the plan worked!! and even though she wasn’t in love with you yet,, this was a start and progress should be celebrated regardless of how big or small
seok’s face is literally tomato red at this point but thank god you can’t see it,,
“we should celebrate after work then”
and you look at him,, his eyes trying to avoid yours in case you reject him,,, and you do it
you peck him quickly on the cheek,, and you’re just like, “yeah, i think we should”
before he can say anything,, you realize what you did and your face turns into a tomato,, your hands flying up to your lips,, like i can’t believe i just kissed him 
but he grins, taking your hands into his, intertwining his fingers with yours,, pressing his lips against your knuckles
“so it’s a date?”
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massmurdera · 8 years
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Favorite Podcasts 2016
I have a data entry job in a lab processing bodily fluids. I hate the monotonous job, but one perk of the job is I get to listen to podcasts 40 hours/week,  time flies by, and I feel somewhat productive.
PERSONAL OPINIONS… -podcasts are best done between 2 people, preferably comedian friends. Sometimes, there can be too many cooks in the kitchen (Filmdrunk Frotcast, for instance, runs into this) -it’s usually best in person: you can sense that in some podcasts where they do it via Skype or on the phone -I avoid local sports talk radio like the plague—so you don’t get blowhards with hot takes/talking points where they have to have controversy to get ratings. Generally, everybody on podcasts gets along, it’s natural, funnier, and doesn’t fill hours. -while I don’t think some of these podcast comedians will ever become household names, they are doing some of the best work out there that’s ever been done comedically. It’s like Howard Stern and what Chris Rock said and I’m going to fuck this up: he might be the funniest person of all time if you compile what he did into a single hour. I feel like you could do these with a LOT of people. But they never will. -you listen long enough, it should feel like a friendship you are a part of. You know the people, get the inside jokes, and enjoy the banter. -best episodes tend to run 60 minutes or less—otherwise, it can get real bloated.
BEST EPISODES -End of World Election Night (Joe Rogan)—Bill Burr steals the live show from Stanhope, Rogan, Kreischer, etc—tour de force that came out the night of the Election while shit was going down. Burr is going for pure humor and some guests come on who have an issue with how he views things in a blunt, fair way where everything gets shit on and everything sucks: but, at the end of the day, his life is not going to be ruined. What I like about Burr is this: he will say awful things that you don’t agree with...but by the end you are on his side and laughing with him. -600 Dollar Podcast-‘Voyeur Motel’—Halpern reads out Gay Talese’s story of a guy who ran a hotel and had a secret viewing station set up above every guest’s bed and he would watch people have sex. It’s creepy, but here? Funny as hell. The ‘Back to the Future’ joke Halpern quickly gives almost made me crash on the Mass. Pike -Dollop/My Favorite Murder crossover-‘Otto in the Attic’ -Dollop does a murder w/ My Favorite Murder as guests. It is wild. -Dollop-‘Bundy 2: Oregon Takeover’ –one of the first Dollops was about Cliven Bundy, the anti-government rancher. This time, his kids took over Oregon—and, most recently, they went unpunished despite a takeover with guns. Just unreal. -Pardon My Take-‘Cat Killer Michael Rappaport’ (first part interview goes for 15 minutes or so) -Justin Halpern’s Papa Roach story on Frotcast—I was in tears at work listening to this. It helps to have been of age when Papa Roach was a thing in the late 90′s/early 2000s (Filmdrunk Frotcast; 3:30 mark on the ‘Best of 2016’: 90 second story basically)
BILL BURR’s Monday Morning Podcast (funniest comic alive mostly does a 1-man rant by himself) 2 episodes a week—1 of which is half throwback episodes
I don’t get how Burr does it: it should be impossible for Burr to carry a podcast each week by himself for an hour, but he does. He rambles for an hour, takes listener e-mail. He is THE only person I listen to advertisement readings for: he somehow makes that funny, shits on the ads who sometime remove them. But it’s like listening to a guy workshop some material and improve himself in small ways as a comic.
I will say this though: when somebody else enters the podcast, it becomes funnier. His wife, Nia. He can play ball with and you can sense him having an audience and naturally be funnier. 600 Dollar Podcast: a comedy podcast between 3 comedians/writers who talk about marriage & raising kids—but it’s totally not that at all and always goes AWOL 1 episode per week—but hasn’t been one in months Horrible title for a show—started off as ‘Wild’n’Out Without Nick Cannon’ but they got a cease and desist from Cannon’s lawyer.
Justin Halpern (Shit My Dad Says), Tommy Jonaghan (breakout guy of the show and a stand-up) and Patrick Monaghan (another TV writer)
This podcast has come the closest since Walking the Room to genuinely making me laugh out loud each week. Consistently. Great and funny stories of failure. Fucked up in the best way and goes FAR down the rabbit hole of topics.
BEST EPISODES…. #7-‘Voyeur Motel’ (Halpern’s Back to the Future joke) #11-‘It’s Called a Vagina’ (when Halpern loses his shit at the 10:15 mark) Dollop (two comedians: American history read to a friend who has no idea what the topic is about. Point is, you realize America has NEVER been great and it’s supremely and endlessly fucked up) Walking the Room is my favorite podcast ever. Laugh-out loud funny friendship and THE best and funniest take on unending failure and, like Patton Oswalt said, being a shit-magnet for people/things. They do live reunion ones once a year—and they generally suck and aren’t the same but I’ll take what I can get. Anyways, that podcast is over—and the Dollop, a history, took over as Dave Anthony’s main thing (He’ll do conversations with Wil Anderson on TOFOP/FOFOP that are fun and closest to Walking the Room, but it’s not the same: he’s much more relaxed/normal whereas Dave was putting on a face as someone who hated his goofy friend, Greg, part of the time and was angrier than he was—and if you follow him on Twitter, he is comically angry and outspoken)
Sometimes, the Dollop can be hit-or-miss and I tune out a bit. Within first couple minutes, I can tell if it’s going to be amazing. Gareth can improv too much at times—but when it’s on, it’s on. They’re incredibly quick and it never tires how incredulous Gareth can get to the stories to Dave’s sarcastic, nonchalant storytelling while EVERYTHING that is happening is fucked up.
I think if they could make a lot of these Dollops into movies, they would be amazing. Some Mel Brooks-ian shit. I would rather see the Dollop’s version of Hugh Glass than Leonardo DiCaprio’s version in ‘the Revenant’. The show got a nod of the head in the ‘Tickled’ documentary.
But my jaw drops at American history I didn’t know about—or to its extent—and then laugh hard. Some of it is minimal characters/events that are just funny—others are wildly serious or show parallels to today.
BEST EPISODES… -‘Otto in the Attic’ (crossover live w/ My Favorite Murder) -‘Bundy 2: Oregon Takeover’ (anything involving Cliven Bundy’s family and their anti-government militia) -Black Panther Fred Hampton’ (not a funny one—but a guy I never heard of who should have been up there with MLK/Malcolm X had he not been assassinated by the FBI/American government) -‘Girl Watchers’ -‘Domino’s Pizza Story’ -‘Philadelphia Mayor Frank Rizzo’ (pre-Trump guy) -‘Boston Busing ’74 & ’75 PT 1 & 2’
All-Time? ‘the Rube’ is the best in a runaway or me. ‘Purity Ring’, Tickled, Hugh Glass, some of the earlier ones are great.
IF YOU LIKE THIS: history’; Drunk History comedy…My Favorite Murder My Favorite Murder (true crime—one comic and her affable friend read 1 true crime murder to each other) 1 episode per week; 90 minutes-ish
True crime is all the rage—so it makes sense as to why this podcast has become insanely popular. It might be easy to shit on, in a morbid way, to go over murders in a ‘fan’ way: but it’s the same way movies/TV shows/news each night centers around murders. The show might glorify people—but there’s a common bent/theme around certain killers and their upbringings—or possible life-saving life mottos (‘fuck politeness’). I can see the show doing more positive things, giving $ to rape kits being tested (how the fuck was that NOT a thing?!?!)
I was aware of Karen Kilgarif because Dave Anthony dated her and she was a guest on Walking the Room. But it’s AMAZING when people you are vaguely aware of find their own avenue. And become stars in their own right—and people you look forward to hearing each week.
Her friend, Georgina, is just as easily likable. DEFINITELY comes across like a gossiping girly-girl (I heard that criticism), but she’s so damn cool, genuinely funny, and cute (even before I saw how pretty she was—there’s no way to describe it and you can sense it with how Karen adores/views her). It could be a really dour show OR droning in the wrong hands, but they make the topic rightfully serious but fun simultaneously in the best way. It is respectful to the victims.
But yeah, they read Wikipedia entries to each other and bring in a heavily-informed obsession to the podcast. But it’s the humor and chemistry that helps saves the show in tone. It’s not as heavily-researched as the Dollop or formatted in a natural storytelling bent, but it’s successful.
KEY EPISODES…. -Live from LA Podfest (crossover with Dave Anthony of the Dollop) -Chicago Podfest (changing point for the show: you realize that they are massive in this episode in ways they didn’t expect—with a rabid fanbase) IF YOU LIKE THIS: you’ll like the Dollop
PARDON MY TAKE (sports podcasts) 3 episodes per week; 60 minutes each I want to slap myself in the face listening to this—because these are the two best young, likable stars in comedy/sports. IT IS HARD TO DO SPORTS COMEDY DONE SUCCESSFULLY BECAUSE PEOPLE TAKE IT TO SERIOUSLY! Big Cat comes across like Jimmy Kimmel; PFTCommenter, however, steals the show—and he’s incomparable (maybe Stephen Colbert for being able to stay in character?): basically he’s born out of ‘hot-take’ culture and mocking it. There’s a format to the show, some interviews, segments.
Yes, it’s part of the Barstool Sports empire—run by douchebags (a friend of mine is cousins with Portnoy—tried getting an autograph for her boyfriend who loved Barstool Sports, he refused), but forget that.
LAUGH OUT LOUD… -Stingray Steve calls the fall of the Berlin Wall (a southern college football fan—they get him to announce each week’s big plays; when they FINALLY get him to call a key moment in history, I lost my shit at work) -Jimbo of the Week (mailbag fails from readers) -Monday Mornings after NFL games where they mimic Chris Berman’s recaps of the games
BEST EPISODE… -Catkiller Michael Rapaport (Rapaport is an actor/personality easy to shit on—but he comes across great as a podcast guest on Bill Simmons, Bill Burr, Pardon My Take: he’s game)—September 6th -Marlins Man/Foul Ball Fan (July 6th) -Martin Shkreli –when they shit on him; it’s interesting to hear them be affable/likable/funny with people they clearly hate. Marlins Man & this episode are pretty great interviews to hear how naturally funny they are, easy to get along with, even while still getting jokes in at people they hate. It’s not easy.
TOFOP & FOFOP (Australian comedian and funny actor friend poke at mostly American pop culture) -Charlie Clausen is the co-host on TOFOP -FOFOP gets its name from the show ‘Fringe’: it’s ‘Faux-TOFOP’, typically with American comedians. Dave Anthony is the best guest for FOFOP.
Wil Anderson is an Australian comic—he’s ridiculously affable, charming, and naturally funny. This is my closest substitute for Walking the Room, in a way, with its chemistry between two comics. It doesn’t come close, but that’s fine. I don’t get all the Australian references (rugby, pop culture, politics), but I don’t need to as an American—because America dominates just about every episode.
Clausen, on TOFOP, is damn likable. I can’t say enough about how naturally great Anderson/Clausen are on podcasts. It’s not just the accents that do it.
BEST EPISODES… -#263-‘Should I Go Home?’ : post-election w/ Dave Anthony I don’t think that’s right, but I’ve laughed out loud with pop culture breakdowns like Game of Thrones, Westworld, or shitting on Zach Snyder Batman/Superman movies in the funniest way I’ve heard (miles funnier than Filmdrunk-but no real format to the show) Inactives: NFL talk, fantasy football…and some parenting
In a just world, Matt Ufford should be a mammoth sports media star alongside Katie Nolan. He’s likable, outspoken, funny—plus he’s a military veteran/Captain in the Iraq War (though he does not come across as that).
So yeah, an NFL podcast with Ufford (Seahawks fan) and Nick Stevens (Pats/Star Wars fan and stand-up comedian). Stevens should be easy to hate as a stereotype of a Boston sports fan—but he’s naturally funny and likable, quick with jokes/takes on a spot.
The first episodes of 2015 are great for Matt’s all-time depressing Wal-Mart riff and Stevens’ reaction or Stevens bringing up the Butt Fumble that made me cry laughing—and Ufford lost his shit.
Also, I’ve NEVER done fantasy sports, but I still enjoy the show—most NFL show (NFL Ringer; Simmons; Barnwell) aren’t funny, have chemistry, and maybe too nerdy—this is wildly funny, enjoyable.
YOU’LL LIKE THIS: football, comedy, Star Wars
Filmdrunk Frotcast: Pop Culture, Movies, Comedy As I said, sometimes this show can have too many cooks in the kitchen. There can be 4-6 people on the show sometimes—some of whom aren’t funny or interesting like Laremy, Lindy West. Matt Lieb grew on me heavily. I found him unfunny and someone who comes across as funnier than they think and the other people on the show let him do his thing, don’t cut him off, laugh too hard, or know what to do. But he’s become a centerpiece of the show and now I don’t mind it. I dig Brendan, Joe Sincilito, and some other dude that’s been on more of late But Lieb does not really have an equal comedically to play with him, so he feels very much like an excited dog who just wants to play but could use another dog to play with. Horrible analogy, but feels right.
The show—and Uproxx, in general—hits on topics I am VERY familiar with and want to hear discussed. I hardly tend to agree with Vince Mancini’s tastes and sometimes opinions—he’s more of a critic than a comic. Lieb mostly looks for pure comedic bents and can derail the podcast, in a good way.
KEY GUESTS: Justin Halpern, PFTCommenter, Matt Ufford, Joe Sincilito SONG: Matt Lieb’s ‘Corporate Birthday’
BEST EPISODE: ‘Best of 2016’ (as an entry point, it does a good job capturing what the show does—love it or leave it. So lots of Lieb improv and made-up songs on the spot inbetween conversations)
REVISIONIST HISTORY: MALCOLM GLADWELL 10 episodes total (on hiatus)
Heavily organized and produced. I avoid boring This American Life podcasts like the plague, but Gladwell does that a bit—but better here. It’s interesting.
Best episodes: ‘Satire Paradox’; ‘Lady Vanishes’..the 3-part college episodes is an obsession and interesting political/social axe that Gladwell has to grind.
RECOMMENDED: if you like Malcolm Gladwell’s books even a little—this is otherworldly as an investigative podcast piece. It should NOT be this damn good. BILL SIMMONS (mostly sports) 2 episodes/week; 60-80 minutes each He gets shit on fairly—and sometimes over-the-top unfairly. He has a tired schtick and thoughts, a HORRIBLE voice (the opening segments on his TV show were due to be a disaster), unfunny. I don’t know how to say it: someone like Justin Halpern has a HORRIBLE voice—but he transcends that because he’s so goddamn funny. With that said, he’s talented, inspired/broke the door open for a lot of people, is a good podcast host, easy/affable enough to listen to, and has good taste. I don’t think his friends are funny or worthwhile  (House; Cousin Sal) but I enjoy Jack-O. Mike Lombardi is painfully bad—but I have to sit through it as a die-hard Pats fan since he was in the Pats organization until just a couple months ago. But he gets damn good guests every now and then.
BEST GUESTS/EPISODES: Michael Rapaport, Gladwell, Wesley Morris, Al Michaels, Robert Smigel, Jay Glazer; Key & Peele, Chris Sacca, etc, etc COMMON SENSE w/ DAN CARLIN (a historian rants about politics in a focused way) Carlin is like Burr—he does a podcast by himself for an hour and rambles a bit. Difference is, there is not a single funny bone to Carlin’s body. I agree with Filmdrunk: Carlin comes across like a Right Wing radio host in how he talks—but he’s utterly brilliant. He’s the best guy to break down history in today’s terms. I subscribe more to his thinking as a leftist political-minded person.
I still need to check out ‘Hardcore History’: I hear that’s the shit, but I don’t have time for 12-16 hour anthology pieces. I started listening to ‘Wrath of Khan’ and it’s insane, thorough, well-researched and great storytelling. It’s daunting though.
RECOMMENDED: History/political buffs—with leftist-minded thinking and rambling HOUND TALL: Educational live comedy show where an expert  talks about something and comics engage in it in a panel Basically, an expert comes in (a pimp; a woman who was in a harem; Science; Religion; etc) and a panel of comedians riff on that in a loose way. Moshe is brilliant as a host and he has good comedic guests (Pete Holmes; Joe DeRosa; John Mulaney; Natasha Legerro, etc)
SUGGEST IF YOU LIKE: education, in a weird way HANNIBAL BURRESS: HANDSOME RAMBLER Podcast is in early stages. Mainly it’s just Hannibal and his DJ chilling while Hannibal fucks around with autotune at times. He’s been having more conversations with guests lately (Chance the Rapper, for one)
Episode 2—Hannibal’s experience with Air B’n’B’s JOE ROGAN 3 episodes per week—3-4 hours each The podcast simply goes on for FAR too long (3-4 hours) and the topics meander far down the rabbit hole. But, if you’re like me and have the time, you don’t mind having to listen to a 3-4 hour conversation.
Rogan is a far-out dude, gets shit on for his opinions, lifestyle (Hunting & MMA most likely), and politically correct people (it’s overblown). But he’s an open and fair-minded dude, even if I don’t agree with him.
He’s kind of similar to Pete Holmes: long conversations, deep person—except Pete’s is maybe more focused with questions that come up in every podcast (it’s a funnier version of WTF with Marc Maron) and Holmes is just plain goofier and naturally funny. Rogan is mostly an intense dude—who has more life experience, hobbies, and skills.
BEST EPISODE: End of the World election night podcast Bill Burr steals the show from everybody, including Doug Stanhope. It’s unreal.
OTHER GUESTS: Bill Burr, Dan Carlin, Hannibal Burress, Neal Brennan
Pete Holmes: You Made it Weird (funnier, goofier, deeper Marc Maron conversations) Burr is the funniest comic alive—but Pete is probably the most insanely likable; they both should be massive. Burr does the best panel work on a night show: he’s an angry, loveable, opinionated dude, pushes buttons in a playful way. Holmes is a DEEP-thinking guy—who just is universally likable. Even his face, it’s goofy and instantly funny.
BEST GUESTS… Moshe Kasher (recent); Garry Shandling (month before he died)
SUGGEST IF YOU LIKE THIS: WTF w/ Marc Maron—if Maron was funny/looser/goofier in his interviews
WTF W/ Marc Maron Hardly interviews comics anymore since he’s nearly interviewed them all. I don’t bother to check out as much. He hasn’t had as much good interviews this year. I’ve seen him live, I think, 6 times (and 2 podcast tapings that were in Boston: first one was the best by far)
But reason why his podcast is great is that Marc isn’t a whole person, he’s finding himself—and you can sense he’s trying to make himself better and find himself with the people he’s interviewing. He’s looking for grace, understanding, and just being a better person.
Also, everybody skips the openings to all his podcasts—and just cut to the interview.
BEST INTERVIEWS… Robert Kelly (underrated: might be one of the funniest people I’ve seen live—his own podcast has great moments: him w/ Burr, DeRosa, Kreischer on Bertcast was amazing) Louis CK; Jeff Goldblum
CHAPO TRAP HOUSE Caught this only in the last week.
The Ben Shapiro takedown in the last episode of the year was great (they read passages from his awful book of the extreme conservative writer. Helps to know who he is in a way)
SUGGESTED EPISODE… -Post-Election breakdown ‘We Live in the Zone Now’: My thoughts exactly as a lefty on the election & state of politics
OPIE RADIO Anytime they release a Patrice O’Neal, Bill Burr, Louis CK, or Robert Kelly oldies, it’s special. Some of the most brutal and funny comedy ever was done on Opie & Anthony. A show as PACKED with people as, say, Filmdrunk Frotcast could use is actual comedians who are mostly all on the same level ‘funny’ as each other. Except the main thing with this show is that they bust balls in the cruelest way. Endlessly. With that said, you can easily hate the fans of the show and hate Anthony Cumia’s politics and how far-right/distant he has become (got fired from the show)—and still recognize how brilliant he was as a host. There’s a treasure trove of amazing material on Opie that you can put up with the best comedy ever. It’s the original podcast and when they re-release old shit, it’s a goldmine.
-We’ll See You in Hell w/ Joe Derosa (2 friends talk movies and shit on each other for liking or not liking certain movies: it’s Roger & Ebert basically) Derosa has a mostly HORRIBLE taste in movies.
I don’t think I could recommend this podcast to anybody unless you’ve heard him on a podcast with Pete Holmes, Bill Burr, Hound Tall, or Opie. Pete Holmes would 100% be the best (Pete’s podcast to hear Pete’s impression of Joe, Hound Tall) and Burr would be great to see how easily Burr shits on him. Otherwise, you’d just view him as an unlikable asshole.
Derosa has a couple albums out and they’re worthwhile. But there is one that he recorded that went AWOL and the crowd absolutely was drunk and derailed his special, so Joe went with, trashed his special, and just went off on the audience trashing them. It’s amazing. It’s “You Will Die” and it’s the second part of the special that was recorded and meant to be the special.
COULD GIVE UP ON AND BE COOL -Bill Barnwell (NFL podcast) -NFL Ringer -the Watch (TV/movies)
Only because I’m a big football/TV/movie fan—the hosts aren’t very good, funny, interesting or standout. I think they are good, straight-forward writers though (all formerly of Grantland). I listen to these episodes at 2x speed to make them go by faster. OVERRATED PODCASTS -Keeping It 1600 Politics podcasts from people who worked for Obama as policy advisor & speechwriter. They get insider guests/journalists. Sure, it’s mildly interesting to hear them go over current events—but it’s ultimately forgettable. Kind of smug. Jokes aren’t funny. They are inoffensive dudes and centrists. It’s a podcast for water-carrying establishment Democrats generally and I think they are blind to see at how limp and ineffectual their party is and why that is so. I guess the podcast that came after the election is interesting to listen to—and how shocked they were. They never thought it would happen—and they never thought Hillary was a horrible candidate.
I’d say the Ringer podcasts (the Watch; Simmons) the people who host the podcasts are NOT funny people at all. There’s laughter going on, but it’s never made by funny people. I like Simmons, but I can’t defend him being naturally funny the way he would like to be.
SUGGESTION: listen to Wil Anderson, an Australian comic, alongside Dave Anthony cover politics on FOFOP. I started listening to Chapo Trap House-that’s better than Keeping it 1600 and what I wanted in a politics podcast MOST DISAPPOINTING PODCASTS -Serial season 2—checked out after a couple episodes. It tried something new and failed miserably. -Deadcast –Drew Magary is the funniest online writer for a decade now, but he comes across as obnoxious and loud on podcasts. Tim Marchman? A boring contrarian killjoy. They go over topics I enjoy hearing about though, but I gave up. Also, they do it via Skype, so it misses some chemistry of podcasts that do it in person.
DON’T LISTEN TO ENOUGH BUT THINK ARE GOOD -Chelsea Peretti (Bill Burr episode is great—but that podcast has like 3 episodes a year) -Guys We Fucked -My Brother My Brother & Me (3 brothers, comedy—and I heard their Dungeons & Dragons podcast Adventure Zone is great—but I’m not into that game) -Sklarbro Country (Sports + comedy) -Todd Glass (Patton Oswalt as a guest was amazing a year or so ago)
PODCASTS I PLAN ON CHECKING OUT MORE IN 2017 -Chapo’s Trap House -Dan Carlin’s Hardcore History
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