#I think in a slightly lower stakes au xiyao should wait a few years get back together because they love each other and then break up AGAIN | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

lgbtlunaverse · 5 months

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I don't think we talk about xiyao exes to lovers enough. I understand that in canon the "breakup" ended with death and imo it was never going to end any other way (I have a lot of feelings about how jgy is doomed from the start) but even in aus where survival is an option I barely ever see their full potential realized. The fact that there is this heartbreaking gap that is between them now, and yet that, despite it all, they can't stop loving each other. When you have drama this good, why is the conflict relegated to outside threats and we end up with little to no exploration of internal strife, of the fact that these guys have been living a domestic lie for a decade (I cannot stress this enough, the amount of parralels between xiyao and jgy's marriage to qin su are staggering.)

And let me be clear I will NEVER begrudge anyone their hurt/comfort and wanting their faves who are denied happiness and peace at every turn to find it. god knows I need that sometimes. Or even the less healthy but so emotionally devastating fics where the caring isn't good, and it doesn't fix anything- might only make things worse, actually- and xichen ends up recreating his father's fate. I love all of those things. But. Man. This divorce was over 11 years in the making it should take AT LEAST that long to resolve. What do you do when the person you trusted the most lied to you for years? What do you do when the only person who's ever believed in you loses that faith so completely they'd hurt you over a lie without hesitation? I need me some xiyao who try to get over each other for 20 years and fail. I need them to meet after not seeing each other for years and have it hurt like no time has passed at all. I need arguments where no one raises their voice but that feel like a screaming match anyway. Do you see my vision?? Do you see what we could have?

(if fics that do exacly this are out there, recs are of course welcome)

#mdzs #meng yao #xiyao #lan xichen #jin guangyao #rs: i wish it could've been you #this might make some people really mad #at the idea that jgy has any right to have grievances with xichen but uh...#i'm not interested in arguing with jgy antis. go scream at a wall #or a different camp who DO like xiyao but who are like 'but xichen was lied to jgy wouldn't blame him'#the fact that it was a lie makes it WORSE you guys know that right?#some of you have never been the proverbial boy who cried wolf #and had people assume everything you say is a lie because you've lied in the past #and good for you! You SHOULD be honest with those you love i'm very happy for all of you #but also. lmao. you have no idea how that feels.#i have read aus where they break up and get back together of course #but i always end up feeling like people see the conflict as an obstacle? a thing to get past so we can get them back together #and not.. you know. the most interesting part. the selling point #I think in a slightly lower stakes au xiyao should wait a few years get back together because they love each other and then break up AGAIN #when they realize that the old relationship they had with that easy trust is gone forever. love isn't enough to bring that back #you can build something new. including a new kind of trust just as potent. but that old easy kind is gone.#and i think they should try to get it back because it was the best thing they ever had #and get fucked up about it when they realize they can't #and it should take them well over a decade to mourn it until they're ready to let it go and try to make something new of it #PLEASE let me talk about the xichen qin su parralels please let me talk about how rusong is nmj-coded #not in personality but in the function he has narratively as someone that can never stop haunting jgy.#the fact that nmj's death and rusong's birth were likely extremely close to each other timeline wise LET'S TALK ABOUT IT

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