#I wrote this at 2 am last night but I'm posting it now so yk.

[quiescentdestiny]

Jean answering with "my father" hurt me in ways I can't even explain.

Renee told him that if he couldn't give them the truth to say it was from childhood so people would leave it alone, but was he really lying when he said that?

It wasn't the truth but it wasn't a lie either.

[summerofspock]

ok so last night i read car trouble from like midnight to about 2:30 (it was AMAZING) i couldn’t stop reading it until it was done you wrote the most ever gender-envy crowley i have ever encountered it’s insane. also i like had a moment of appreciation when i read the whole ‘you can’t treat me like that’ thing bc i love seeing works where there is actual boundaries like the characters are actual people. anyways the story was so so amazing and i saw it was posted a WHILE ago so when i saw the link to your tumblr i thought oh no maybe they’re now not so active (bc that happens yk and it’s fine bc obv people have their own lives?) but i was so glad to see you’re here and active so i can send a bunch of love for your writing into your inbox <333333

Oh thanks!!! I was really in my feels when I was writing car trouble which I think comes through in the fic itself. I'm glad you enjoyed it!

I am still active here but much less so in the gomens Fandom unforch so if you follow me it will probably be a lot of danmei and shit posts. However you are always welcome.

Thanks for swinging by and for the lovely compliment 💛

[shoulderscars]

If you had told 13 year old me that I would be invested in music, both my violin and songwriting/producing, actually did a //sport// (that isn't intimidating, I love skiing AH) and *enjoyed it,* had a stable, loving relationship with all my family, and am settled in the outside appearance of who I am right now... Well. I don't know what she would do that girl was a fricken mess.

And I'm sure I could play this game ten years from now and also be shook... it's just. Sometimes I feel like there is an ever-present ticking behind me, which (news flash for everyone) there is, but being content is not the end of the world. I could go on for many many essays about how settling religion in my heart is just a struggle, and how balancing outside life and who I am is hella hard, but at the end of the day... I can be content in my life and still in crisis.

(there's a cut so I don't waste your scroll time lol)

This year has been... A lot. Around this time last year I was very severely SH-ing, and it was just a bad loop I was in. And I've experienced AMAZING things this summer, and been to places I can even process in hindsight. I've learnt balance, and figured out why my relationship with food is so hard, and how I need to start going about my eating life in light of that. But, a lot does not have to always be bad. I've learnt about parts of my mind (TALKING ABOUT YOU IRRATIONAL FEAR) that I didn't know I had. Also that I like rom-coms.

For every shitty moment that happened in this past year I can LITERALLY FEEL how much sharper my brain is now than before. LITERALLY FEEL IT. And I'm... yk, I'm not actually sure what emotion I'm feeling but I'm just overjoyed to be content.

No, I don't need to fit into a body type I don't have (yes, I do need to learn my triggers, and work with myself to get into a better physical state)

No, I cannot be neutral in my war against myself and a clash of worldviews that I somehow //know// will be beautiful someday.

Anyway.

There were 2 major deaths in the peripheral of my life last year, and I've both understood that grief and losing someone is hard, but it opens doors.

And of course, there is a ticking clock, and I need to be more aware of it in a not paranoid way.

SO.

this was gonna be a skiing appreciation post, but then it just became a year in review post.... So HEH ENJOY THE TEA FRIENDS

hugs hugs hugs!

<33

(P.S. I have the best big sister in the world. Everyone understand, sometime in May some not so great things happened online to my bestest greatest sister in the world, and I think if I don't say this i would have failed my public school training: there are people behind the usernames. Real people. So before you go calling someone some name, or even saying that they aren't a real fan, just think about it. After all, we aren't as important as we think we are.)

(P.P.S. I WAS GONNA SAY IN THE LAST PARAGRAPH THAT MY SISTER IS THE BEST AND I LOVE HER TO DEATH BUT I GOT DISTRACTED LOL. My sister is literally amazing. I love her so much. And I know the next... 3? (it's 2 and I know it but I'm tryna be hopeful) years are gonna be really different that the last however long we've been in this "we are besties and no one can stop us" phase. And I love you. LITERALLY SO MUCH. and you are gonna be a super duper duper duper good nurse. Cause your the super duper duper duper duperistist bestest greatest biggest sisterist everist. Love you @redpiperfox <33)

(P.P.P.S. would anyone read my year in reading reviews? I read books this year, and I wrote reviews on them and and and.... id love to share 🥺 TELL ME IF YOU'D READ IT PLEASE!!!)

(P.P.P.P.S. ok good night for real now)

[kvgehiras]

waaaa i'm sure whatever you have typed up is great!! if you ever decide to post it, i'll look forward to it ♡

cough cough SO UM,,, ik this is oddly specific but i hope you don't mind aha .. a character of your choice with someone who has some important exams coming up soon, maybe?? i've like ... procrastinated like all of my work and slept through the entire few weeks before,, so i'm currently on the brink of eternal sleep (my fault, wholly, really) i don't mind who, just pick your favourite/s!!

thank you in advance!! qwq

hello again anon!! THANK U AAAA i might post it after the current event ends bcs im busy grinding lately lol but i will post it soon so i hope u like it ehe ;; as for ur schedule PLS SLEEP !!!! i do know the feeling off not doing any of ur work nd just resting but sometimes it's ok anon! studying when ur not feeling like it will only feel like a chore nd u probably wont be able to retain any of it. so study when u want to, bcs while exams r important, so r u hehe <3 anyways here r the charas!! wrote a lil scenario for mika, leo, nd rei!! hope u like it <3

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

KAGEHIRA MIKA

• mika overworks himself alot, mainly bcs he just wants to prove, to himself and others, that he is worthy of being a part of valkyrie

• but he still likes being a lil spoon when yall r cuddling (o˘◡˘o)

• while he is a powerful artist when hes on stage, he just melts when hes in ur arms yk!!!!

• so he doesnt mind it when lately u seem to be slacking off a bit more than usual bcs he gets more cuddles from u !!!!! #mika1stwin

• but when u suddenly stop out of nowhere nd even refuse to come out of ur room at times bcs uve procrastinated ur work too much nd if u do not finish going through ur material then ur doomed to fail nd oh lord-

• "(y/n)?"

• u look up at ur bf nd hes standing beside u- w his stuff in his hands.....?

• "ah ya see.....ya've been lookin' a lil stressed lately so i thought abt.....helpin' u like this! idk what is troublin' ya, but im here to always listen! :D"

• u break into a grin, one mika had missed so much, nd grab his cheeks to plant a kiss on his cheek

• nd still keeping ur hands where they are, u pull away to look at his bright red face

• "thank u mika... ill always be here for u too, ok?"

• nd he quickly nods, scared to meet ur eyes, esp bcs of the close proximity of ur faces rn

• what a lil baby

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

TSUKINAGA LEO

• leo is honestly the last person u want to see when ur trying to finish learning ur material,,,that too in a rush

• like!!!!! u love him u rlly do but this bitch will start doodling abt his inspiration nd all nd ur brain just cant focus yk

• that, nd also that if u dont give him Any attention At All he will literally wither away nd basically refuse to sleep nd WILL stare at u till u give him kissies (nd he alrdy doesnt sleep enough........ sigh)

• so when he wakes up in the middle of the night (the one night u managed to somehow get him to bed) nd doesnt see u in the room a part of him panics

• he quickly calls out for u nd when he hears u respond from the study room, he opens the door to see u slowly turn around from ur chair, tired, shoulders slumped over

• immediately rushing over, leo tightly wraps u in a hug, a hand running through ur hair

• "(Y/N)!!!!!!!!! WHERE WERE U!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I THOUGHT THE ALIENS KIDNAPPED U!!!!?!!???!!!!!!! DONT LEAVE ME AGAINNNNNN ｡･ﾟﾟ*(>д<)*ﾟﾟ･｡!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

• "leo it's 2 am.......nd also i didn't leave u, u know? im right here!"

• the exhaustion was very evident in ur voice, so much so that leo pulled away only to squint his eyes at u nd go "r u not ok? u sound tired ...... gasp r u DYING????????? NOOOOO U CANT DIE UR MY INSPIRATION!!!!!!!!"

• "leo thats v sweet nd while yes i Am dying im not leaving u it's ok"

• leo smiles, which turns into a grin, nd then he suddenly gasps again nd oh lord what idea is it this time

• "(y/n)!!!!! how abt i sleep here????????"

• ".....huh?"

• "YEA!!!!!! didn't u leave that room so u wouldn't disturb me?????? but im lonely so......ill just sleep on ur lap then, ok? ok! good nightttt!!!!!!!!"

• nd then he places his head on ur lap, the other half on his body relying on the chair he was previously sitting on for support

• while he isnt wrong abt the disturbance part.....he does look content here.......nd he does feel lonely so ......

• mayb u just gotta learn today what u can wing everything at this point...... it's gonna be ok . probably....?

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

SAKUMA REI

• unlike the other two, rei wouldn't even have to guess that ur not doing ok, he would just Know

• nd what does he do to help? flirt w u nd get u to let him teach u obv!

• he Knows it's not rlly teaching, nd so do u, but what can u do when he looks at u w those puppy eyes of his, nd says that he'll do anything nd everything in his power to always help u

• so when he does take in whatever u have to study he..... he realises he's Also bad at this

• good job rei rlly helps out a ton!

• anyways to make up for it, nd also stick w his promise to help u, he tells u to go through the material, nd explain it to him! he heard somewhere that it works bcs it forces u to rlly understand the concept instead of memorising it nd u think it should work

• but oh god how is it supposed to work when rei keeps looking at u w stars in his eyes, nd his hand suddenly grabs urs nd he circles his thumb on the back of ur hand nd IS HE FLIRTING IN THE MIDDLE OF A STUDY SESSION

• rei playfully quirks an eyebrow when he sees u get flustered nd just . lay ur head on the table w sigh nd just whine

• "REIIIIIIIII I HAVE TO STUDY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

• he chuckles bcs he does realise what hes doing to u nd honestly he loves ur reactions so he keeps doing it

• "fufufu.....sorry love, i'll be quiet now. go on, do ur thing." (liar!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ur too flirty for a study session!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

• tip : never keep him in the same room as u when u have work to do . keeps flirting . too much distraction .

• ratings : 200/10 . the additional 200 points is bcs hes too cute to say no....... god he rlly has u wrapped around his finger huh