#I’m so demoralized ahah

[a-very-fond-farewell]

not really free to have much fun these days but I’ll try to be more active. there are fandoms I want to explore and some others that are resurfacing! It’s gonna be great :)

[uyv]

Promise Me

Pairing: Suna Rintarou x Fem!Reader

Genre: Smut/NSFW! The following content contains mature themes. Reader discretion advised.

TW: Hair pulling, spanking, overstimulation, orgasm denial, degradation, I guess this is counted as dacryphilia, jealous sex, semi-public sex

Word Count: 893

Author’s Note: Guess who was horny again hhhhhh anyway but yeah, I wrote this junk because I found myself brainstorming in the middle of class again so yeah. I should really stop being horny during class but really, who cares? 😌 Enjoy!

Taglist: @tspice283 @sapid-rose @tvbiio @lunar-lilly @kukiisan

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“No, wait–!” you let out another amatory shriek as Suna kept diving into your gushing warmth, quavering around his length in the most blissful way. You shuddered when his cock nudged against that spongy spot inside you, one that had you crumbling so delightfully. Your cheek was pressed into the cold surface of the car hood, knees buckling every time his hips smacked against yours. Tears streamed down your cheeks, your face muddled with streaks of mascara and wet makeup. Your dress was wrinkled, hiked to the small of your back so that Suna could easily fuck you to his delectation.

“Did you really think I’d let you off after you were talking to Atsumu like that?” he nipped at the shell of your ear, causing you to whine.

“Rin–I’m sorry!” you cried out, feeling your knees start to fail on you. Suna Rintarou wasn’t the most energetic man during sex, but when you were swaying your hips in that tiny little dress of yours, talking to Atsumu so enthusiastically with that flirtatious grin reserved for only him–he couldn’t hold himself back. Your arms reached out to hold onto something so desperately because you knew you were bound to lose your balance soon.

“If you wanna go back in there, you gotta promise me something first.” You sobbed as you felt his blistering palm land onto your ass, more tears blurring your vision.

“When you go back in there, you’re gonna smell of sex. You’re gonna smell of me, got it?” You moaned in response.

“Answer me, slut.” He reached in between your thighs, dewed with your slick to capture your treacly clit between his index and thumb, triggering a prurient whine from your throat.

“Yes!” you gasped out, your breaths pitched with each harsh thrust he gave.

“Wrong answer.” another parching spark was delivered to your ass.

“Yes, Rin! I promise!” you wailed, the sweltering fire in your stomach starting to sear you from the inside. You wanted so desperately to cum.

“You’re gonna show the team that pretty face when you get back in, alright? Just keep smiling, like you did with Atsumu.” he growled out his former teammate’s name with so much vitriol, another whimper slipping from your lips.

“Y–Yes! I–I–!” you squealed as his cock struck your cervix, your eyes rolling back in your skull.

“You what, princess?” he yanked your hair to drag you out of what was almost your exultance, your convulsing figure crushed under his.

“I promise, Rin!” you gasped out finally, clawing at the vehicle with all your might. He reached down to trace beguiling circles around your nub.

“Apologize.”

“I’m sorry, Rin! I’m so sorry–! P–Please, I need to cum!”

“Sounds like you just want to cum, huh? You’re not really sorry, are you?” he snarled.

“No, please! I really am! I’m so–ahah–so sorry~”

Oh, how he wished he could continue. He wished he could hear you scream out his name with so much want laced in your timbre, just like this. It would never suffice to indulge in you just once. You were sickly sweet, sweeter than the cloying relish of tequila on his tongue. He wanted to be buried in your taut, vicuña cunny for the whole night, feasting off your pleas for mercy. You looked the most scintillating when you were ravaged by him, but unfortunately, he had to let you reach your end.

“Cum for me, baby.”

You shrieked one last time, your walls trembling wildly and clutching around his cock, triggering a lascivious bay from him. The tempo of his thrusts were needy, desperate. Desperate to finally mark you. The thought of his seed seeping out of your hole, down your thighs for everybody to see had him reeling. Nobody was able to see you like this but him, and he intended to keep it that way.

He grasped your chin so he could see your ravishingly fucked out expression, the apples of your cheeks grimy with wet mascara. Your tongue was slung over your bottom lip, your sweet, sweet puppy dog eyes gazing back at him with a demoralized bearing as your warmth surged around his member.

“Look at me when I cum inside you.” he muttered, pulling your hips flush against his, a choked whimper falling from your lips. He tossed his head back, groaning your name as he painted you in his colors.

A few moments in silence had past, only the trill of night critters and the sounds of cars passing filling your ears. You felt Suna nuzzle his nose into your temple lovingly. You turned your head to meet his softened gaze, lips intertwining for a honeyed last dance.

“Let’s head back in.” he murmured, clasping your hand in his.

“Wait, I need to see how I look first.” Suna grumbled at your last comment, knowing how displeased you’d be with your makeover. He watched you take out your phone from your purse and scowled when you gasped at your reflection on the screen.

“God fucking dammit, Rin, my makeup is ruined! What is everyone gonna see when we get back into the clu–” before you could finish your statement, he wrapped your lips in his one last time, not as gently as before.

“If you start complaining, your dress is next.”

Needless to say, you were quiet for the remainder of the night.

hehe

am i confident about this? no 💜

hope y'all enjoyed it tho! 💜

[jjkfire]

update 4/27/21:

I'm working at a startup so it's extremely busy. but I love my job! i am trying to find the time to fit writing in my schedule tho. gonna figure it out someday lol. my stories are not abandoned, don't worry. all the endings and plot points have been planned. i'm just struggling to find the time to write atm. still very grateful for all the kind words and support you guys have given me over the years. hope all of you are out there living your best lives, exploring, learning, and finding joy in all the little things 😊 join my tag list (read the instructions pls) to get notified when I update my fics!

//

previous big update:

hello! i know i’ve been sort of mia but… it’s been an absolutely chaotic time for me. 

the (long) story goes a little something like this:

earlier this year during spring break, i had friends who convinced me to give america a shot and apply for jobs after grad. i really didn’t want to because the visa process is a pain and it costs a lot. also, not a lot of companies want to hire internationals so it’s very demoralizing to receive a million rejections… but my friends are very persuasive people lol. 

so it was super hectic during the last few months I had in the country as i tried to get through the visa process, study, work, beef up my resume, apply for jobs and graduate at the same time. (i understand that a ton of people have to do this too… but it’s hard y’all). anyway, one Medium article, one cold email, and a number of grueling interviews later, i found out i got a job!

now i just had to convince my parents… this was actually in all honesty, the most stressful part. i love them to death but my father really made it feel like i was choosing between my family and a job and ngl i cried myself to sleep on the regular. in the end, he finally gave me the okay to take the job but i know he’s still very upset. that’s honest to god the worst part. (my mum’s been super supportive tho so i guess that’s the silver lining in all of this!)

prior to getting the job though, I was really in limbo. I had returned to my home country because I and by extension, my parents, were not confident that i was going to be able to land a job in the US. I was very confused because I was neither here nor there. I was interviewing with the american company from my home country, trying my best to make sure they’d still be interested in me as a candidate no matter how many hurdles there were. then, to ensure that I had a safety net, I was also doing interviews locally and sending out resumes whenever I could. I was exhausted. and I know everyone goes through the job hunt so it’s equally as exhausting for everyone but yeah it was not a fun time.

anyway so now that I took that job in america i gotta move halfway across the world again, but this time without financial support and i don’t know… maybe this is the first time i’ll be truly independent and ya im seconds away from shittin myself. really gotta put on my big girl pants and try to not be broke yeet yeet.

but uhh that’s the low down on why i haven’t been able to write much at all…….. and yeah! working on it tho… haha always working on it.

to end all of this, I just want to say that I’m super lucky to have all of you. I basically got the job because of that article I wrote. I know I sound like a broken record talking about my article over and over but I dunno I guess all of this is just a little wild to me ahah.

I owe a lot of my confidence in my writing to all of you. I personally think my writing improved bc of this blog and the support you guys give me is… unreal (“: I know it may seem insignificant to some of you to reblog/like and comment on a fic but it really spurs me creatively and makes me feel sort of confident about my writing. all of that is probably why I didn’t think twice about hitting that post button on my article. although it’s a very different type of writing… I don’t know it’s just knowing that my writing is worth something… knowing that my writing is worth taking 5 minutes out of your day to read, is pretty cool and you guys kind of gave me that! (i am in no way saying that my writing is the best thing on earth. far from it. but i think you guys understand what i’m trying to say!)

so in some way, you guys helped me get a job! nice work team hahahah. also, also i just want to say, never give up. I decided I wanted to try my luck at the American job market maybe around the end of March and graduation was in early May. so I had about more or less a month to do something. I knew I needed a way to set myself apart from everyone else because my gpa wasn’t stellar and I hadn’t had any internships in America. not to mention the fact that I was an international student hence it was even harder to get hired. so basically, why would a company pick me over the next person? I thought perhaps knowing how to code was the way to give myself an edge so I learned some basic python and sql but then I realized there wasn’t really an impressive project I could attempt within that short time frame and I also knew far too little to do anything anyway. this meant that I was back at square one.

so, I switched gears instead. I sat down and really thought about what I could do. I concluded that at the very least, I could write. I knew I could write so I needed something that I could use along with my writing and I was like… it’s gotta be data! knowing that, I picked up the basics on how to use Tableau and I also picked up VBA macros in excel (if you don’t know what this is… I think you should Google it. it will literally blow your mind. excel can do a lot more than you can imagine). Then, I picked what I wanted to write my article on, got the data I needed from google trends, used vba macros to make the calculations faster, used tableau to make charts based on the data and photoshop to spice up the charts and etc. I did my research in the meantime as well and had a rough plan on what I was going to write about. after this, it was all systems go and it went a little like this:

wrote the article. attached my charts. linked the links. hit that post button. applied to all the jobs & companies that I thought would see value in what I did and can do. got rejected many times. felt discouraged. did more searching on companies that were willing to hire internationals. decided to send a cold email to a company. ACTUALLY HEARD BACK. went through multiple interviews. ACTUALLY GOT THE JOB.

so guys, never give up. recognize your strengths and build around that. if you think you don’t have any strengths, look harder. if you still feel you don’t have any, make the effort to learn something. it’s never too late for anything. I did all of that in one month and 10 days (the learning stuff and writing the article thing I mean). always be open to learning. I say this so much irl that my friends are sick of it but in this day and age with the internet, you can literally learn anything. so please, learn. learn for fun, learn for whatever reason. learn anything. you’ll never know when it’ll come in handy. like my basic Photoshop that I learned just so I could make a header for my blog… literally used that skill for the graphics in my article lol.

anyway, you can achieve a lot more than you think you can. you just gotta throw caution to the wind and do your own thing. be determined, be proactive. if things aren’t going the way you think it should be, do something to change that. you are all amazing and capable of great things! I hope you all know that. my mum always said if you never try, you’ll never know. don’t be afraid, don’t stop to think about what other people will think of you. keep doing you. people doubt you enough so don’t add to that. keep your head held high and keep moving forward.

once again I want to thank you guys for being sort of a support system for me! every comment, nice ask and sweet message has brought me this far. i really mean it (’: always be nice and supportive my sweet dumplings. your words truly have impact!