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#I'll be getting a new computer soon
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... why he sit like this
#in this position his face is extremely 'cartoon cat' shaped.. like the perfectly round cheeks and little#rounded bump of a snout.. big round eyes. etc. stretched over the arm of a chair like a weirdo#cats#It's still Hot Evil Summer time and I have so much to do so am just aimlessly hopping between various projects but not actually#getting anything done. as usual. Also so so so so tired. I almost fell asleep in the middle of the floor like 3 times today lol#Trying to finish some costume photos and also another poll adventure thing. plus I do really want to do a sculpture sometime#I haven't finished one in a while. Hopefully my tiredness is nothing bad.#Maybe I'm anemic again so that's making me tired. Or maybe it's just a Listless phase. not that I'm ever really THAT productive considering#all of the health problems and etc. always holding me back. but still. I'm not usually 'sleep or just stare at a wall literally all day' ty#e unproductive.. at least not for multiple days in a row so. hmm... Sometimes especially in the summer though I will have periods of time#that are listless like that. I am under low level phyiscal stress for months at a time due to summer heat so I guess it makes sense#that would eventually take a toll. I just have SO MANY THINGS I WANT TO DO!!!!! AAUUGhhh#I also came up with a new idea for a game that is so so cool and I wish I could make it but I have to finish the other one first lol#which I will NEVER do. if I spend all day just sleepy unfocused barely able to do anything#I also really need to sell some clothes and sculptures because I'll probably have to buy a new computer soon so I need money. (plus still#recovering the costs of having to euthanize my other cat.. wehh) There's nothing clearly wrong with it right now but it's getting gradually#slower and there's more weird glitches happening randomly and idk.. just weird things that make me think 'hmm... bad.. possibly.'#ANYWAY... I just have so much to do that I both REALLY want or need to do - so it's perpetually frustrating that I just can't for whatever#reason like. Time is always mving forward. every day I waste is a wasted day. The year is already almost half over. I havent finished#any of the projects I wanted to .. and there's only more and more things to do each day. It's overwhelming and stinky#and thats not even considering having to do all of my tasks also with the background noise of economic inequality. everything increasingly#going into an even scarier political direction. active climate change crisis. pandemic that still exists and is insane to act otherwise. et#etc. HOW am I supposed to solo make two whole games . write 3 book series. finish sculptures. do costumes. make outfits. game videos. make#stable network of social connections. do my little side crafts. take care of myself and cats. pay rent. manage health issues. keep a routin#.try to make some sort of money. go to doctors appointments. handle regular maintenance like cleaning and cooking and self care#and buying new plates when old ones break or etc. make sure to do other things like backup my computer data regularly. do shopping lists.#take care of plants. pursue like 6 different academic interests. do the other side side projects I have for fun (like music or carving avoc#ado pits). eat in a healthy way thats okay for my Special Health Issue diet. exercise so i don't die early. etc. etc. etc. AND all while it#82F in my apartment all the time and I have tiny income and also need to move to another country/climate somehow??? lol......#ANYWAY.. ..very frustrated today over my chronic Tired Sleepy.. time for Cat Photos - which cure all of life's ailments lol
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the-leyline-directory · 3 months
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For those curious here's a small collection of other things I've done - ranging from 2 things for friends (top two), into drawings from various other fandoms, as well as my own personal novel/game settings works \o/ (ALT Text included for general credits) Horror etc is actually my main love \o/ so trying to draw 'rounder' or 'cuter' things such as Lalafells is a new learning I'm getting the hang of slowly!! Need lots of practice!!
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confetti-critter · 1 month
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Okkkkkk well I'm not gunna shave my head tonight I dont wanna :3
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johnnys-green-pen · 2 years
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nailtagyuri · 1 year
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phhhhhhh my godddddddduh i liked the shenanigans pt got up to this episode but the POTENTIAL I SEE in them makes me really distraught
#tpot spoilers#THEY COULDVE BEEN SALESPEOPLE TOGETHER IT WOULDVE BEEN SO FUN. LIKE TEAM ROCKET IF THEY WERE TWO MEOWTHS#youre all really lucky my computer is being taken to the repair store soon or i would make like 30 poststhat are just whining#Ive accepted that we'll never see them interact again unless jnj hire me or SOMEHOW she ends up rejoining or SOMEHOW they end up on the#same team in season 6 or whatever comes next <- willing to wait an eternity but i reallhy hope she's at least acknowledged they#already mentioned cloudy twice. i drew a gag recently that was basically what i think would happen if they were to bring up her absence in#an episode it would be fucking Devastating to me but itd be something. itd be SOMETHING#whatevr i liked the drama in this episode i think the death pact split was interesting and basketbottt my beloved i cant WAIT 2 see#where they go i think rf's personality change was cleverly written and built up to and augh basketball cares about her sooo much its so cut#clock plot armor was surprising i could use this opportunity to complainnnn because of the obvious but im glad to see that theyre#committing to resolving his arc. The S being ufe twice in a row was funny imagine if winner gets out next SLASH JAY#JN was up as well im not Overly Worried this time i think taggy is going to be carried by voters by the novelty of being The New One and#The One That Makes Silly Faces for a while and i'll live if one of the others get out. I'll be sad I love all of JN but I wont frow up
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riighteouspath · 8 months
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believe it or not, i have not actually abandoned this blog.
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discoreptile · 2 years
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Zaptor from Elestrals!
#elestrals#pixel art#Hey gang another secret tag update#I am in talks with the guy who makes this and he's commissioning me to make every elestral :')#this is my first animation commission/job that will stop me from having to worry about commissions for like... months#maybe even a full year. who knows. But the point is I will finally be a big shot#My home and love life are comfortable as can be but I have been worried about money a little recently as commissions are sporadic#But... I'm actually on track to move to full time animation. I'm so excited.#Game is still under construction. Story is done and I'm still coding. Might need a new computer soon because this one is nearly a decade old#I'm so hopeful that the universe has finally thrown me a proverbial bone at least career wise#I have a small fanbase who is really really nice to me and I met a lot of friends there and I need to remember them when this all kicks off#Misty Ripley Heck are three that have been super supportive and I will help give back to them for keeping me afloat this whole time#Ashley has also been subscribed to me for a year. It's our year anniversary soon and I'm so nervous bc I'm not certain what to get her/do#Will just be grateful to have more memories w her. Might get a little trip away somewhere if she can get someone to watch pets#just checked. Nothing standing out but I'll figure it out now that money is significantly less of a worry#I guess that's nearly every one of my worries gone. Just gotta actually grind and finish game and I'll have nearly nothing to complain about
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manushoe · 2 years
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It’s been 3 years since I fucked up my laptop from a drinking mishap, man. I’ve been eying a new one for months now.
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emordnilap-fr · 1 year
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MIGHT might stream art tonight (sat night) if im not dead by daytime activities. i have stuff to WORK ON
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filmdesque · 1 year
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( jason & jonathan = rarepair i'm so down to fuck with 👀👀👀 )
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villainsrph · 2 years
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hi, another little update !   I know that I’m already behind, but I am unfortunately going to be taking today and likely tomorrow off. my back pain has been incredibly bad the last few days, to the point where I cannot sit at my desk and my chair is heavily exasperating it. I’ll be around sometime this afternoon to get caught up on messages and management though!  thank you guys for your patience !
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cruel-simmer · 9 months
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i just spent far too much time queuing berger g2 and my queue currently goes to mid march...
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keeps-ache · 10 months
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game wants my email to play, i give it my email. i don't play game, because it was kind of eh anyway. they send me emails, because i gave them my email. i ignore them. they send me more emails. i ignore them. they send me email with a subject title that is essentially 'hey free stuff !!!!'. i boot up game. game wants to update. i know this takes forever so i do other stuff in the meantime. it doesn't finish updating for 3 hours. my computer is lagging. my music is bugging. my stylus is trying to fake another death. it's finally done updating !! i hit 'play'. loading screen for 30+ minutes and i can't listen to my music now because i don't have the option to turn off game's music on the loading screen. my everything is so slow. so so slow. but also.. despite all this................. free stuff.........
#just me hi#not only is this game overwhelming + confusing + boring but it doesn't even run well on my computer lol#can you guess what game it is. can you guess hfvsh#i'll tell you#if you guessed g3nsh1n 1mpact you were Right hfbvhsf#i wanted to try it cuz i love poking my nose into everything in open world games but ohouahgggauhgh#it's not my vibe lol#and i could leave it at that really... but also there's this sunk cost fallacy i've got going on where it's like Okay man. but we've spent#SO much time just Updating it. andalsothefreestuff#and because i don't really even play this game i don't even know what stuff i'm collecting lmao !! i just like having it :3#they gave me gambling tokens last time i think. very cool#i spent them all immediately and got a neat bow out of it ! aand then i almost immediately logged out fhsdvb#i dunno i don't really get shoving everything at you as soon as you start. like do i really have to have these little journal things Now ?#idk and i don't really care to know so! i will keep collecting my stuffs lol :>#//anyway in other gamey news i think i'm pretty okay at othello lol !!#this is not a very recent revelation but i had never played before + made my mother question what was even happening so i'm kind of proud o#that hfhvsfvh :3#+ also i am Going to try and hurry along with my minecraft lighthouse ! this is going to take a while#the plan is to make a rather small one first cuz i want to build one with my brother#but i want ot be sure i know what we're doing so !! :>>#//anyway happy advent or whatever is going down or up and toodles until...... .o.
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steampunkedparm · 1 year
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aw yeah sweet! i have an moderately ok paying job that gives me enough to pay for college if i have scholarships!
every electronic i know deciding to malfunction as soon as i actually have money: so about that
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sanguineterrain · 2 months
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crushin' | jason todd
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Summary: Barbara invites you to dinner with the Bats. She's done so before, and you've always declined, but this time, you agree because the Bat you've had a crush on for ages will be there. Little do you know, the only reason he's staying for dinner is because of you.
Pairing: Jason Todd x gn!reader 
Word count: 2.5k
Warnings/tags: batfam shenanigans, dick is a good meddling brother and deserves a fruit basket, fluff and humor, kissing, crushes, love confessions. just wanted to write something sweet and light :)
the divider
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"So you're gonna press this," Barbara says, demonstrating on her own screen.
You follow along, clicking and typing. She nods.
"Good. Then you're gonna do this."
You open the file. A video of what looks to be Bruce drunkenly hula-hooping pops up. Your eyes widen.
"And that's how you keep Bruce in check," Barbara says, patting your shoulder. "Use sparingly. Only when he's getting on your last nerve."
"Wow," you say. "Babs, I... I don't know if I should have this kind of power."
"No, it's cool. I have dirt on everyone in this family, so really, it's my power. You're the only one who gets to see the vault."
You look at her. "You scare me."
She grins. "Thanks! Anyway, you're free to go. They'll be back from the mission soon, so our job is pretty much over."
The computer beeps. She checks the notification and types back. Then she hums.
"Or, you can, y'know, join us for dinner. Alfred keeps wondering when you'll do so."
You press your lips together. "I dunno, Babs... are you sure? I don't want to intrude."
"You're not. Seriously. And you know what I just found out? Jason will be here too."
Well. That does certainly stop your refusal in its tracks. You haven't seen Jason properly since he returned. You feel a pang of guilt at that; true, he's never at the Manor, at least not when you're around. But you could've reached out by now.
Still, being able to see him again properly is a wonderful opportunity. One you can't pass up.
"Okay," you say. "I'll join you all. As long as Alfred's okay with it."
She rolls her eyes, smiles. "Don't be ridiculous. C'mon."
You follow her to the elevator Bruce got installed for her. In the Manor, most of the family are sitting down to dinner. Damian and Cass are on one side of the table. Bruce is at the head. Alfred is still bustling in the kitchen.
You start to pull out the chair next to Cass, but Barbara startles you.
"That's Dick's chair!" She smiles sympathetically. "Sorry. He's particular. Isn't he, guys?"
"Yes," Cass says. "He's comfortable here."
"I've no idea what you're referring to, Gordon," says Damian. He nods at you. "Hello."
You smile. "Hey, Damian. That's fine. I'll sit next to you, Babs." You sit in the middle of three chairs, with Barbara on your right and an empty chair on your left.
"Hi, Cass. Hello, Mr. Wayne."
"Bruce," he reminds you. That's not happening. It feels way too weird to call him Bruce, even though you've known him since Jason was Robin. Just, no.
Cass smiles. "Hello. Glad to have you."
"Where's Tim and Duke?" you ask.
"Thomas is at university," Damian says. "Drake is probably with that idiot clone he calls a boyfriend."
Bruce looks up. "Tim and Connor are dating?"
"Good God," Barbara mumbles.
"Well, yes, Father. They've been dating for quite some time, even shared a room together. Last month, Drake went undercover in Atlantic City and the clone—"
"Old man! Where are you?"
"Jason, just—"
"Shut it, Dickhead."
The grandfather clock swings open, revealing the Cave entrance. Up stomps Jason, followed by Dick. Jason has a smear of purple goo on his forehead, but otherwise is clean. His back is to you.
Jason points an accusing gloved finger at Bruce. "You owe me a new bike, new guns, new gear, new phone, new—"
"Jason, slow down. Why exactly do I owe you new things?" Bruce asks.
"Because Tweedle-Dum here didn't scan the fuckin' spaceship that landed in Syracuse and melted my bike with purple goo!"
"It said it was empty," Dick says tiredly. "How was I supposed to know an abandoned ship would spit goo?"
"Okay, alright, boys, don't fight. Yes, Jason, I'll compensate everything you lost in Syracuse."
"Yeah, you will. And a new fridge." Jason thinks. "And a new TV."
"Master Jason," Alfred begins, walking into the dining room with a dish of roasted potatoes. "You may continue your bargaining with Master Bruce after dinner. Wipe that alien sludge off your face and have a seat."
Jason sighs. "Alf, I appreciate the invite, but you know I don't dine with most of the folks at this table. Gets real fuckin' crowded."
"Master Jason, watch your language," Alfred says sternly. "We have a guest. Behave like the young man I raised you to be."
Jason scoffs. "Who, Barbie? She doesn't—" He turns and stops, staring at you.
You smile, suddenly self-conscious. "Hi."
He swallows, eyes wide. "Hi. Hey."
"Aren't you staying for dinner?" you ask, confused. "Barbara said you were."
"I—" He glances at Barbara, then looks at you. "Uh. Well. I don't really..."
"C'mon, Jay, you guys should catch up!" Dick says brightly, already seated.
Jason's mouth sours as he turns to Dick. You pull out the chair next to you and tap the seat.
"You can sit next to me," you say, looking up at Jason.
He immediately turns back to you, lips parted. "Oh. I—y-yeah. Sure. Thanks."
"Master Jason. The goo," Alfred reminds, raising a brow. "And hang up your jacket."
Jason quickly backs up and bumps into the table corner. He winces.
"Right. I'm gonna... yeah. Be right back."
Jason disappears down the hall. Dick grins wolfishly at Barbara.
"You're amazing," he says.
"I know," she says, shrugging.
Alfred serves the last tray of vegetables, then sits. Jason soon returns, gloves and jacket away and goo-free.
"Did you style your hair, Todd?" Damian asks.
"No. Shut it." Jason scoots in his chair, glaring at his brother. But when you pass him the tray of roast, his expression softens. He smiles at you.
"Thanks," he says, and puts three slices on his plate. "Great roast, Alf."
"You haven't tried it," Alfred says, but looks very pleased.
"Don't need to."
"We're very glad you're here, Jason," Bruce says. "All things considered—"
Jason holds up a hand. "Ah-ah. I'm not here for you, old man. Save the speech for another day."
"And who are you here for, Jason?" Dick asks, propping his chin on his hands.
"None of your beeswax, Dick."
Dick shrugs. Damian begins to talk about an art project in school. You pay the appropriate amount of attention until Jason nudges your arm.
"Hey," he says, nodding at your empty glass. "Didja get something to drink?"
"Oh." Heat creeps up your neck. "Um, no. Sorry. I didn't know where to get the drinks."
"'S okay. Alf doesn't put out drinks anymore 'cause everybody drinks something different. You just help yourself to whatever's in the fridge. I'll get it for ya."
"Jason, you don't have to—"
He holds up a hand, smiling. "C'mon, none of that. You're a guest. Orange Fanta, right?"
You blink. "You remembered."
"Uh." His cheeks go pink. "I mean, yeah. No biggie. I'll be back."
Jason stands. Immediately, the others pounce.
"Are you going to the kitchen?" Dick asks.
"No," Jason says.
"Can you get me another Diet Coke?"
"Todd, if you're going to the kitchen, I would like another lemonade, please," Damian says.
"I just said I'm not going to the—"
"Master Jason, will you please bring this into the kitchen?" Alfred asks, holding up an empty tray.
Jason heaves a sigh. You wince.
"Sorry," you whisper.
He shakes his head and winks. "Nah, 's not you."
Obediently, Jason takes the tray and goes to the kitchen. He returns with a Diet Coke, which he tosses at Dick, who catches it with one hand, and a bottle of lemonade, which he throws to Damian who also catches it with one hand and a scowl. Finally, Jason opens the Orange Fanta for you and gently pours it into your glass, then sets the half-full can next to your plate. He sits down.
"Of course they get special treatment," Dick mumbles into his drink.
The table rattles, and Dick winces, squinting at Jason. The table rattles again, and Jason hisses.
"Boys," Bruce says wearily. "Enough."
"Yeah, Jason," Dick says, sticking his nose up. "Y'know it's my birthday soon. I deserve a brother who doesn't kick me."
"Oh, I'll tell ya what you deserve," Jason begins.
"Are we doing laser tag?" Cass pipes up from the end.
"'Course we are! Everybody's gonna be there." Dick looks pointedly at Jason. "Except my own brother. He refused."
You look at Jason, who's got a nasty glower aimed at Dick.
"You're not coming?" you ask.
Jason's expression melts away when he turns to you. "Uh, I mean—"
"No, he's not," Dick says, pulling the saddest pout you've ever seen. "He said he wanted nothing to do with my stupid birthday."
"Those weren't my exact words."
"They were very close," Damian says.
"Shut—"
"Jason, I can't believe you aren't going to Dick's birthday," Barbara says, shaking her head.
Jason's mouth falls open. "Et tu, Barbie?"
"You should come," you say, touching Jason's arm.
He immediately looks at your hand. You slowly remove it, smiling sheepishly.
"Then we can be a team," you say. "We're playing doubles. I'm horrendously bad at laser tag, but I bet we'd win together. I'd watch your six."
"Leaving them in the lurch, Jason?" Barbara tuts. "So unlike you."
Jason heaves a sigh. "For God—okay. Alright, brother mine. You win."
You beam. "So you'll come?"
"'Long as you and I are a team," Jason says, a little shy.
You bump his shoulder with yours. "Of course."
Dick looks at you. "You should join us for dinner every night."
You laugh bashfully. "Thanks, Dick."
Dinner goes on. Bruce excuses himself early, as do Cass and Damian. Soon, it's the four of you plus Alfred cleaning up after dinner. You and Jason are loading the dishwasher when Jason hisses. He pulls out his hand, revealing a thin red cut on his palm.
"Are you okay?" you ask, hovering worriedly.
"Yeah, 'm fine. I'll take the tray—"
"Jason, no," Dick says, herding him away from the dishwasher. "You have to get that wrapped immediately."
"What are you—dude, it's a tiny cut—"
"Yeah, but there was food on there, and you have no idea what can get into the wound and make you sick," Barbara says seriously. "You need to get it cleaned right now."
Jason rolls his eyes. "Fine, whatever. There's a first aid kit in the closet."
"There isn't!" Dick says, shooing Jason toward you. "Alfred hasn't restocked it. You have to go to the Cave. You should both go."
"Yes, great idea," Barbara says, looking at you. "You have medical experience, don't you?"
"I mean, a little, but—"
"More than us!" Dick says, shoving you both towards the hallway.
"I don't think so..."
"You take care of Jaybird here, he needs that hand," Dick says cheerily, opening the Cave entrance. "Go on, go."
"Christ on a bike," Jason mumbles, and heads down the stairs.
You follow, confused and concerned. The entrance slides closed. Jason goes to the medbay, muttering under his breath as he digs through one of the drawers with one hand. You join him, searching the top drawer for the antiseptic spray.
"Is the cut really bad?" you ask, trying to get a better look.
"No. My brother's just an idiot. Nothin' new."
You pull out the spray, some gauze, and a bandaid. Jason nods in thanks and goes to take it.
"I can do it," you say. "I do have medical experience, after all."
He snorts. "Fine by me."
You both sit on the edge of a cot. You turn to Jason and pull his hand into your lap. He inhales sharply. You stop.
"Is this okay?" you ask.
"Y-yeah. Fine. Sorry. I don't get touched a lot." Jason's mouth screws up. "Ugh. That sounded weird."
You laugh. "It's fine, I know what you meant."
He scratches the back of his neck while you clean his hand. He has big hands. Bigger than you remember. They're deeply scarred and calloused. You rub your thumbs over the pads of his fingers without thinking.
"You got soft hands," Jason says quietly.
"Heh. Thanks. The computer life."
He hums. "I didn't know you were working with Babs."
The guilt swims back full force.
"I know. I'm sorry. I should've reached out, Jason. I-I basically ignored you. Not on purpose! I just... I guess I wasn't sure where we stood and I thought maybe you'd be mad I was working for Batman after everything and I was afraid that we wouldn't—"
"Hey, whoa. 'M not mad." Jason finds your gaze. You frown. "I'm serious. I don't mind that you're working for Bruce. I mean, hell, I do too, on occasion. Mostly I just bitch at him."
You giggle. He smiles. You're still holding his hand. You don't really want to let go. Jason doesn't seem to want to pull away either.
"Well, even so, I'm sorry for not reaching out. I did miss you, Jason. And I'm glad you're back."
He clears his throat, ducking his head. "Huh. Well, I missed you too. And y'got nothin' to apologize for. I could've asked about you."
"Well—"
"Uh-uh, no, I'm the king of self-deprication. Y'can't take that from me," Jason says, eyes dancing with mirth.
You sigh dramatically. "Fine, fine. Can we say that we both could've reached out?"
"That's agreeable. And, uh, while we're clearing the air, I'm so terribly sorry 'bout my dumbass brother."
You tilt your head. "What do you mean?"
"Ah, huh. Hm. Well, funny thing. I kinda had a, um, crush on you, before. And Dick has it in his head that I... that I have a chance now. So... yeah."
"Before?" you ask.
You don't know why you're disappointed. It's not like you knew. Except maybe if you had, you wouldn't have missed out. Maybe you wouldn't have lost so much time.
Jason glances at you. "What... why are you sayin' it like that?"
"Like what?"
"Like you wish... that I..." He shakes his head. "Forget it."
"Jason," you say, barely a whisper.
He looks at you. His eyes flick to your lips, just for a millisecond. "Yeah?"
"Can I kiss you?"
A beat. Your heart falls.
"Yeah." Jason nods. "Yeah, kiss me."
You heart soars.
You hold Jason's face, still holding his hand. He gingerly touches your neck with his uninjured hand, strokes behind your ear with his thumb. Every nerve alights. You're kissing Jason Todd. The boy you've loved since you were thirteen.
"They did it! They're kissing!"
Jason growls against your mouth. You know it's not aimed at you, but it makes lightning shoot down your spine. Wow.
"'M gonna kill 'im," Jason mumbles.
You smile and pull back, just an inch. "It's nearly his birthday. At least wait till next week."
"Hm." Jason kisses the corner of your mouth. You like him so much. "Fine. Y'know you can convince me of pretty much anything? Wield that power carefully."
You wrap your arms around his neck. Jason braces you with a hand on the small of your back.
"I'm very flattered, but I think you're confused, Jay." A kiss to his jaw. "It's you who has a hold on me."
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bbokicidal · 1 month
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"Are you serious...?" - Angst! [Hyung Line SKZ]
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Notes : These are all obviously fictional situations, the red flags are just based off of habits we know they have (like Chan's need to be needed, Changbin being blunt/honest.) This post isn't me saying I think they have these red flags, it's just a fun angsty prompt I wrote down. If you don't like it, scroll and don't read.
If people like this - a maknae line will be written! If not, prolly not lol.
Warnings : Angst with no comfort, red flag behavior - some of these aren't even that bad or could be misunderstandings but still.
Maknae Line | "Good Luck, Babe." Part Two!! Here!
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BangChan - Brushing off/Having the wrong priorities
One time, it was him forgetting a dinner date - the next, he was staying at the studio late when he was supposed to be meeting your parents for the first time. You let it slide because ultimately you understood that his job took up a lot of his time, and honestly? It wasn't easy to forget about but he had a tendency to take care of you and make up with it by quick gestures before he left the apartment or when he came home; Soft back hugs, quick cuddles before he fell asleep, or kisses in passing. Lately, however, he's been slacking. He'd begun to shrug you off any time you'd touched his arm or hand, nudging you away while he typed on his laptop. He'd tip his head away from yours while laying in bed together or he'd sit further away on the dressing room sofa.
The tipping point was when he was getting ready to go on stage and was standing in wait for the others to be ready. There was still five minutes and Chris looked a bit jittery, so you figured a quick hug or kiss would help ease his nerves. However as soon as you approach and reach to touch his arms, he steps back and keeps his eyes trained on his phone. You reach again, hesitant, and his brow furrows as he maneuvers to the side to get away. "Don't touch me."
Your lips pop apart in surprise. "...Are you serious?"
He looks over, eyes briefly wandering your face before he reaches to fix his in-ear and walks away to the door, disappearing around the corner and leaving you standing there alone. Even the soft touch of Felix's hand on your back as he passed by was warmer than anything you'd felt from Chris in the last two months.
Lee Know - Keeping secrets / Prioritizing Privacy within himself
Minho had a very, very bad habit of not telling you things. In this instance; That he was leaving for tour in two days.
A world. fucking. tour. The only reason you didn't know about it was because you hadn't been out of your home in the last few weeks unless it was for a quick coffee at the cafe or to grab lunch with a friend. Work was heavy during this time of year and as someone who worked remotely, you often spent grueling hours in your office on your computer - hunched, tired, head pounding and back sore.
So you would think that when you entered your bedroom one evening after just finishing up sorting files in your office, you'd be happy to see your boyfriend already there. And you were for a moment, until you realized he was packing three rather large suitcases full of his clothes and necessities. He looks to you, then away, wordless.
"Are.. you.. moving out, or something?" You breathe in a laugh, eyes wandering over Minho as he folds a t-shirt and tucks it into his suitcase with the others.
"No. I have to bring all of my luggage to the company building tomorrow so they can have it at the airport when we leave for Australia."
"Australia?" Your brows quirk. "When -- Why --"
"Tour." He stops his movements to stare over at you, a hint of irritation evident on his face. "We're going on tour for six months."
"Six--" You breathe out, eyes widening. "Six months. And you didn't think to tell me?"
Minho moves to drop a pair of pants in his suitcase. "I would've told you if you could handle the news, maybe. Every time I mention leaving all you do is whine and pout about how long I'll be gone."
"I get upset, yes, what girlfriend wouldn't be upset that her boyfriend is leaving for a week or two? But six months, Minho, I --"
"Don't start." He all but huffs out the words, shutting you up immediately. Minho turns away to continue folding items of clothing on the shared bed and as you watch him do so, you stand and have to wonder if you want to be there when he returns home from the tour.
Changbin - Not knowing the difference between being rude and being blunt
He didn't seem to understand when to stop. Changbin had a tendency to be honest, sometimes to a fault, though you never seemed to complain about it because most of the time it wasn't a big deal. He called Jeongin out for saying the wrong word when singing, or blatantly threw people under the bus when a joke was taken too far.
And he was like that with you, too. He would be honest with you when you asked his opinion of something - was the shirt unflattering? Were you being too loud? Was your makeup bad today?
He'd lay it on you point blank. Yes, the shirt fit a little weird. Yes, you were being a bit loud in his ear. And yes, your eyeliner was going in two different directions. Criticism that was asked for. But when it wasn't asked for? Oh.
"What is your problem?" He bites as he follows you down the hallway to your bedroom. "We have ten minutes, just wear the damn dress and put your shoes on. We have to go."
Your huffs mix with stifled sobs as you rip open your dresser drawer and dig for other options, hands shaking and eyes teary. "You just told me the dress looks ugly, Changbin. I'm not wearing it out if you don't like it--!"
"What does it matter if i don't like it? It's your body, wear what you want!"
"You're my boyfriend!" You retaliate, frustrated. "I want to look nice for you and -- for the group, and I want you to like what I wear, obviously!"
Changbin lets his eyes roll before he turns out of the bedroom doorway and down the hall. You pause to watch him go, listening as he bites about how he doesn't have time for this and needs to leave for the group dinner. You stand in front of your dresser in shock as the door to your apartment slams shut, leaving you in silence and all on your own.
Hyunjin - Being too cocky / Making you feel inferior
It hadn't happened before now, and you weren't sure why it happened at all. But it did.
You'd approached to gently hold onto your boyfriend's arm as he talked to an older idol - someone he looked up to and had just done a collaboration video with. You'd only come up to tell him that the food was delivered and he could have dinner before his stage, but the look he gave you when he finally turned his head was .... wild.
No words were needed. The way his eyes directed to the side you stood at before falling as if looking you over and then immediately looking away; The way the smirk on his lips only widened and his tongue pushed at his canines as he redirected his gaze elsewhere. The soft scoff that left his lips. The way his arm slipped away from your hold in clear nuance that he didn't want you touching him.
It made you feel like less. Like he was pretending he didn't know you - Like he wanted you to bug off and disappear from his line of sight.
Hyunjin had a tendency to put on a confident, bold persona when he was on stage and at first you thought maybe that was why he was acting this way. It was lingering in his body from the dance video he'd just filmed with the other idol and eventually, it would wear off.
But as he turned from you and lifted a hand to fix his hair, he talks to the other as if you're not even there at all. And you have to wonder if it's a persona for the video, or a side of him you had just experienced for the first time. Now you could only hope it wouldn't happen again.
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