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#I'm just a means to transfer what my brain spits out into reality
carionto · 4 months
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The duality of Man, or triality? quadrality?
Alien to Human about New Human: Correct me if I'm wrong, but they appear abnormally large for your species?
H: Yea, he's a biggun alright, even without the EV suit I'd say... 7'3'', 310 pounds, bet he power lifts.
A: Umm... not to be rude, but, uhh... he seems, well... how should I put this...
H: Intimidating? Terrifying? Evil? Yea, if this station didn't have high screening standards I'd be totally pissing myself if he started walking towards me. The mohawk and eye tat totally make me believe he could snap me in two with a single glare.
A: I feel ashamed that my instincts are telling me to flee. I wish nature were easier to change.
H (shouting at NH): Hey buddy! Could you come over here for a minute please? You look awesome by the way!
A (whispering nervously): what are you doing?!?
H: Gotta overcome those fears somehow, I believe the best way is a direct confrontation.
NH approaches, somewhat slowly, looking around at all the other aliens in the station that are chatting, waiting around, or doing some work. He finally approaches A and H, and in a very deep and husky voice says: Um, hi, hello. T-thanks for the compliment, I, uh, was a little worried I would stand out too much here.
H: Oh you totally do, my friend over here is practically about to pass out from how much like a gothic viking of death metal you look.
NH: Oh no, I'm so sorry, I-I just grew up in Sweden-Delta and both my parents were huge into classic local music, so I just, uh... it's complicated. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare anyone.
H: Hey, relax pal, we're all good people here. Anyway, what you here to do? I'm planning on starting a bakery, still testing out what kind of flour most species here can actually stomach. My friend here is on the team working on Moon theft preventative measures.
NH: Oh, that's cool. I'm here as an exchange student with the department of applied astrophysics. If all goes well, I can finish my Bachelors degree remotely and stay here as an intern with the head researcher.
H: Oooh, that's cool. (so cool yea that you're apparently half my age but oh well guess I'm a big fat time waster like my father before me and oh god change the subject before I get depressed in front of strangers) That's a real big bag you got there, carrying some super secret science things, eh?
NH: Oh, that... uhh... guess it can't hurt to tell, security vetted it already anyway.
NH proceeds to unzip the bag and hold up a large white piece of clothing with light blue rings and accents, alongside a strange white cap with what looked like small fins, and a curious little backpack.
NH: It's uhh... um... my... Ika... musume... cosplay.... (oh gods I can't believe I said it out loud again)
After a moment of awkward silence, NH slowly puts on the backpack and presses a button on it's strap, and suddenly numerous light blue colored tentacle-like appendages sprout out from the backpack and move in line with NH's movements.
NH: I, uh..., got my engineering friend to make them articulate and interface with my contacts. I can make them do all sorts of things, like make various shapes and animals with them, though works best as a shadow theater.
H:...
NH:...
A now frozen out of confusion than fear:...
H: That's so
NH: (oh I know it's so lame, but I love that show)-
H: COOL! I don't know what a ika musume is, but those things look amazing. You said articulate? How precise can they be? I'd love to have something like that instead of my useless assistant. Poor lad can't make a piece of toast if his life depended on it...
NH: Y-you like it?
H: I LOVE those things. My daughter does cosplay too sometimes, but she makes her Dreadnought suits herself from scraps. One time the military came to our house and installed a limiter on the gauss cannon she found in a crash site, said it would otherwise start to generate small doses of radiation if used too frequently. But she replaced it with a handmade rail gun before the next convention. Do you go to those? Did you see a 7 meter tall hulking metal monstrosity with a bunch of candles all over? That was her.
NH: Oh, I think I've seen video of that, but no, not in person, I go to smaller events. I don't really like big crowds.
H: Oh yea, I get ya, you do seem a bit on the shy side now that we've been talking for a bit. Hey, no worries, like I said, we're all good people here.
NH: T-thanks, but I think I should be going now, the teacher is calling me over.
H: Oh yea, go ahead, didn't mean to take up so much of your time. Have a fun stay and I'm sure you'll ace that paper or theory? Or whatever astrophysicists do, you seem like a solid kid.
NH: Oh, uh, thanks. Good luck with your bakery. And you with stopping those weird people from stealing more moons. Bye.
H: Bye bye, come visit, don't be a stranger now, I'm set up just a short bit from the main lift on floor 14.
NH: R-right, I'll, uh, be sure to stop by soon.
A is finally able to process what they just heard and says: What was all that just now?
H: What? Just a friendly chat with what is apparently basically a kid. Man, this kid's got so much going on, while I'm almost 50 and I have an oven. Life, man, it can go in so many ways. Anyway, let's go grab a drink, I'm parched.
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