#I've been rejected unanimously throughout my life every single time I have tried to either start something up or make something official
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#vent post#you know how it goes#read or don't#respond or don't#this is mostly for me#though I am very happy for all of my irl friends and mutuals and such that are in stated relationships#I can't help but feel envious of them#because though I've talked to and gotten know and done various things with a bunch of people on here#I've had tons of great fun and my life is better for knowing and interacting with these people#I'm still single I guess#it's not even like I don't have people who maybe if I brought it up they would say yes or if they brought it up I would say yes#it's that if I'm the one who has to initiate it even if I think there is a higher than likely chance of it going well#I'm so scared to#I've been rejected unanimously throughout my life every single time I have tried to either start something up or make something official#and I don't know how many more times I can take that before I just give up on the idea#I am a hopeless romantic who has never had someone be willingly and explicitly romantic with me my entire life and sure 27 isn't the oldest#but still it fucks with a girl's head#i don't know#just venting#the optimist in me says I have plenty of time#the lonely bitch in me just wants someone who I'm interested in to say i love you and wrap their arms around me#and the anxiety gremlin in me needs to shut the fuck up before I get the spray bottle#idk#i should take my meds and eat something but im out of one of my meds#fuckin hell
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