#IS HE PULLING A SHITTIN WILLY OR????

[mommymooze]

fic premise for the ask game: gatekeeper and abysskeeper keeper are long lost cousins and realize this one day and become besties

I have no idea what you could be talking about.

Keeping Cousins

Abysskeeper is glad his shift is finally done. He gets to turn in early tonight. Usually, he guards the entrance of Abyss from 3pm until 3am, but there was a schedule change so he’s off at 10pm. Gabe is happy to finally have time to socialize while folks are still out and about. Not that he minds, because he doesn’t. But sometimes it is nice to have deeper conversations than just passing along the news of the day and keeping the lost folk from topside out of danger. He comes out of his apartment, no longer wearing his heavy steel armor, a sword at his side and light leather armor. Enough to protect from the foolish, but not enough armor to say he’s at work.

Waving at Willie the barkeep as he enters the Wilted Rose, he takes a seat at an empty table and checks out the room. Kiki places a mug of what’s on tap in front of him and he pays for the drink, a small tip for the wench. Taking a long quaff, he raises his mug as he sees his counterpart from topside enter.

Gabe perks up. “Able! Come put your feet up!” Waving the Gatekeeper over to his table.

“Greetings! It’s pretty early for you to be down here.” Able waves to the barkeeper, signaling for his own drink.

“Someone was desperate for a time swap so here I am. Anything interesting going on in your neck of the monastery?” Gabe drains his mug, giving a signal for another.

“I’ve got something juicy.” Able leans closer to tell his counterpart in a low voice. “So I hear that one of Jeralt’s lieutenants was being a real horse’s ass, the guy they call Goldilocks with the long blonde braids, right? So Jeralt dragged him into his office and had a chat with him for a couple hours. The next time I see him, his head is shaved all around the sides and he has a flat top! His hair sticking straight up on his head, flat enough to sit a plate on and straight enough lines to use as a ruler!”

“Ya gotta be shittin’ me! Goldilocks!” Gabe slams the table with his fist, laughing the whole time. He laughs hard, ending with a snort. “I ain’t seen a flat top haircut in years. My Uncle Bill was a Sergeant in Gideon, that was his only haircut. Always said too much hair made your helmet fit poorly and the enemy can scramble your brains easier.”

“Hah, yeah.” Able laughs, then pauses. “Did your Uncle have dark black hair, smoke those stinking stogies that you could never get the smell out of your clothes if you stayed at his house for too long?”

“Gawdess the stench! But nobody tells a guy whose chest is as wide as the Aramid river what to do. What? You know him?” Gabe leans toward his friend.

“He was my Uncle! Married Jenna and they had ten kids. He always put peanut butter and jelly on his ham sandwiches.” Able grins.

“That’s the same guy! So if he’s your Uncle and my Uncle, we must be cousins or second cousins or something!” Gabe laughs and bangs his mug against Ables before draining the contents.

Gabe pulls out a notebook and quill, starting to write up his family tree, Able doing the same. By the end of their conversation, they found they may have met each other when they were 5 years old and probably met several of each other’s brothers and siters.

“So what do we do now?” Able asks.

“Come on, you know what Uncle Bill would say.” He says as he puts his arm around his cousin’s shoulder and they shout out together.

“Drink ‘til ya can’t walk, an’ crawl yer way home!” They laugh and order more ale until they are too drunk to walk and crawl home before the morning light.