#LISTEN. listen. I'm. gay. wow. i love him so much i wanna kiss his fucking face holy shit

[spookyactionanyway]

So I took all of Billie's songs and put them to the plot of Twilight. I'll explain under the reading break ↓

Not My Responsibility - The Cullens just existing in forks like

Come Out and Play - The cafeteria stare downs in the first movie, also in reference to Edward not being able to read Bella’s mind during the first movie (also not acknowledging that he literally wanted her dead in the first movie based on Midnight Sun)

When I Was Older - Edward’s transformation to a vampire with a nod to his human life

My Strange Addiction - Charlie describing his entanglement with Carlisle to Billy Black 😂😂😂 (the power of this one??? Woah)

Bury a Friend - when Edward is like “say it, out loud. Say it!” Cause he’s like “what the fuck how do you know so much.” Another re-up on the “I’m a killer” speech.

When the Party’s Over - Edward and his “I’m a killer”™️. Edward saying he’s a killer is the exact same as Jughead’s “I’m a weirdo” speech tbh

OverHeated - Bella not giving a fuck about Edwards "I'm a killer"™️ bullshit

Lost Cause - when Bella had to be mean to Charlie to leave

Everybody Dies - Bella while James' venom is changing her

Oxytocin - Victoria snapping after the Cullens kill James and she makes it her goal to hunt Bella and kill her

Lovely - Their tension throughout the whole first movie, as well as any and all scenes where they stare at each other in The Field™️

Bored - Bella during ✨October✨, ✨November✨, ✨December✨

Male Fantasy - Also Bella during ✨October✨, ✨November✨, ✨December✨

My Boy - Bella during Edwards absence in New Moon

Your Power - Jacob's thoughts about Edward in regards to Bella while he's disappeared in New Moon ("You ruined her in a year, don't act like it was hard" like HELLO???)

Six Feet Under - Edward’s perspective of him leaving her. ESPECIALLY the line “how can you die carelessly” in reference to her wanting to be a vampire and him being MUY not chill with it

I Didn’t Change My Number - Jacob when he first joins the pack and is mad at Bella for not fucking him and choosing a bloodsucker™️

ilomilo - the brief window where Edward thinks Bella’s dead

Listen Before I Go - Edward when he thinks Bella’s dead cause he tried to kill himself by flashing humans

All the Good Girls Go to Hell - Edwards perspective on Vampirism™️ because he’s “eternally damned” or something

You Should See Me in a Crown - Rosalie just after turning and getting that good good revenge

My Future - Bella realizing she’s decided to turn and would have to move away from forks (cause y’know, the whole not aging sitch)

Party Favor - Jacob during his wolfy brood in Eclipse cause Bella wouldn’t fuck him. With some parts from Bella’s perspective because he was just whole ass ignoring her signals of wanting to only be friends

Happier Than Ever - The weird back and forth when Jacob and Bella kiss in Eclipse 🫤

8 - Jacob because Bella won’t fuck him™️™️™️ (when he dips in Eclipse, cause he’s an asshole in Eclipse)

Bitches Broken Hearts - Jacob during Eclipse

Everything I Wanted - Edward is the one “dreaming of everything he wanted”, that being that Bella won’t turn and will live a long, happy human life. BUT the lines outside of that are Bella being like “okay, but I wanna be with you forever” and the chorus is Edward @ Bella until the “if I could change the way that you see yourself” bit, that’s Bella’s response (I may as well just fucking color code cause omg)

I Love You - all the back and forth between Edward and Bella for the first like 2-3 movies cause god forbid anyone be direct in their feelings

No Time To Die - Victoria’s perspective of James’ murder and the growing anger (BITCH THE POWER OF THIS ONE WOW)

Watch - how Jacob wished Bella would feel about Edward

Wish You Were Gay - Jacob because he can’t understand why Bella won’t fuck him and he’s a Pencil Dick Piss Baby™️ about it

Xanny - Jacob @ the Cullens because he just can’t fathom why Bella would choose them over him (comparing the Cullens to drugs lmao)

Getting Older - Bella reflecting on her high school friends now that she’s a vampire and can’t talk to them anymore

Halley’s Comet - Bella now that she’s a vampire and has to not speak to her family ever again (specifically her mom)

Billie Bossa Nova - Edward's inner turmoil with wanting Bella but not wanting to taint her with his sinner lifestyle™️

Therefore I Am - Jacob when he has to help the Cullens against Aro and his "witnesses" but he's actively mad at them and only doing it for Bella and Renesmee lmao

Goldwing - Bella hiding/protecting Renesmee from the Volturri

NDA - Renesmee type beat lmao

[daz4i]

f/o thoughts head ferdinand

[bootheng]

modern!au k(lance)

they're all in their 20's except for Shiro who's 30 and coran who's 50

first of all. miss me with that 'pining roommate' shit. I love miscommunication and making characters that r sexy bffs with one another

Lance meets Nyma through a Craigslist ad he put up saying he needed a roommate. the moment they met was a tragedy for everyone but them because they're that powerful and beautiful

lance with tousled hair, wearing a half-unbuttoned silk shirt and designer jeans, Michael kors sunglasses pushed up atop his head, arm wrapped around nyma: hi guys this is my roommate, nyma!

nyma, with her blonde 3-ft long box braids down her back, perfectly manicured red nails, bodycon dress and loubitons, hand on lances waist: hey

allura, shaking and on the verge of tears: STOP MAKING US LOOK POOR AND UGLY

Lance is in school for marine biology and Nyma works as a hairdresser and the both of them are small beauty gurus on YouTube that collab with one another

lance: hey guys we're going to be trying out the new anastasia pallete we got today :)!

nyma: and by got we mean shoplifted from sephora

lance: NYMA YOU CAN'T JUST SAY THAT

they're also insta baddies and both gender non-conforming baddies. Nyma is a nonbinary lesbian icon and lance is a nonbinary bicon.... those are like the fucking BEST senses of style

anyone with eyes can see that nyma is into and ONLY into girls but of course... heteronormativity.

rolo: I still don't get why you're dating lance. he's super annoying.

nyma: he doesn't bitch nearly as much as you even when he's got my cock in his ass

they do this thing where when people assume they're a couple they pretend they're some kind of kink couple and freak everyone out

which is why when hunk and pidge meet nyma they're like :eyes: but when nyma flirts with pidge lance doesn't even bat an eye and then lance starts pining about Keith's greasy mullet and his bags under his eyes and nymas got this look on her face that perfectly resembles a man who's lost all sense of normalcy and righteousness in his life and now sits in a bar every night listening to this dumb romance novel type shit and then pidge and hunk are like. oh. no they're just gay.

speaking of keith. he's one of those gays. one of the quirky emo gays that never sleeps and listens to 'coffee and cigarettes' on repeat and has like 3 strings of lights in his room and not only is an art major but ALSO a photographer. and yet somehow he still has the will to wake up at 5 am every morning and go to the gym like some kind of HEATHEN.

Lance knew Keith in high school for 3 years until he got expelled for fighting at the end of his junior year. He was also universally crushed on and was the bad boy jock of the school with a heart of gold so naturally Lance pretended to despise him so he could pine for him in peace

that all goes down the drain when Lance recognizes Keith in one of his classes and goes through the five stages of grief because a) he's hot and b) Lance is openly bi now so he doesn't have an escuse to not tolerate him

(He wasn't gonna do anything about it until he was put in a group with Keith a few weeks into class and he off handedly mentioned he went to Keiths high school, and Keith claimed he didn't remember him, and Lance was just a tad bit upset but was gonna leave it at that except after like 5 days of working together Keith slams his fists into the table and is like 'HOLY FUCK LANCE MCCLAIN?' And Lance is like. w. What.)

turns out Keith does remember lance. very vividly, actually. because he was the guy that everyone kind of had a crush on because he was so nice and charming to everyone he met, and Keith was SO gone for him. he just didn't recognize him tbh, which makes sense, bcuz in high school lance wore blue contacts and had straight hair and now he just wears glasses occasionally and leaves his hair wavy. Keith is gay and stupid don't blame him

keith, bursting into Shiro and Adams apartment at 2 pm: SHIRO HOLY FUCK

adam, bags under his eyes, underneath the covers of him and shiros bed: good fucking god not again

I'm tired of talking about ppl other than Lance and nyma though so I'm gonna talk about them for a bit because im love

as I said Lance has wavy hair and his actual eye color is brown but as he was growing up he was hella insecure about it that's why he wore blue contacts.... nyma caught him once trying to put them on again and put an end to All That Real Quick

nyma has brown eyes too and they're super dark, almost black, and that shits breathtaking bro. she usually has her real hair dyed blonde all the time and permed but she also likes to wear wigs and get braids too because she knows she looks damn good in them. everyone is jealous.

lance has tons of super light freckles. Enough said. nyma has a birthmark on her hip that's kind of shaped like a horse if you look at it from the right way

lance: you were a horse girl as a kid weren't u

nyma: how fucking dare. how fucking dare you say that. I really do have to laugh.......

nyma: obviously I was a warrior cats stan

lance's sense of fashion ranges from 'i went to California for a week once and now I can't stop wearing sweatpants and slides' to 'It's surprising I haven't gotten robbed at this point'. Lance is a scholarship baby so all the money he saved up through countless jobs and the one he already has at a coffee shop almost exclusively goes to clothes and kombucha

Nymas sense of style is definitely more on the eccentric side but since she looks good in EVERYTHING she gets away with it. think dollskill but with more neon colors and designer. she's the kind of person that never wears the same shade of lipstick for a whole month and has a box full of makeup palletes that are almost untouched and everyone who has seen it is both jealous and in wonder FENTYWAYS...

Keith goes over to lance's apartment for a project of sorts and immediately assumes that Lance and Nyma are a thing (they're very platonically affectionate, Nyma will kiss lance's cheek and they cuddle sometimes) which is disappointing but it's not a surprise considering Lance is so Lance and everyone else acts like they are dating so that must be the case, right?

lmao you thought.

nyma: holy shit. holy Fuck. God, allura is so hot. I would probably die if she brushed past me. I would die happily knowing I've been blessed by the touch of an angel.

lance: yeah haha she's really pretty.

keith, struggling to not choke on his coffee hearing All This at 9:31 A.M. in starbucks:

Keith asks if he can take photos of the two of them for his photography insta and they both jump on it so they can flex being sexy and afterwards Lance thanks him with a kiss on the cheek and Keith is sent REELING into gay mayhem.

lance: do you think that was like..... too much.

nyma: i think men are dumb that's what.

I mean u can't really blame Keith because Lance and Nyma are constantly joke-flirting with one another on social media and are in almost every one of the others photos in some way, or at least tagged, so by the time Keith actually works up the nerve to ask about that, it's been WEEKS since Lance kissed him and he's been miserably failing to ignore it

keith: so.... how's nyma doing?

lance: she's good! She's spent all day dying one of her wigs so she went for a coffee run lol. probably will hang with allura and shay later too

keith: and.... that doesn't make you jealous?

lance: LOL no.... they could never compete with me (talking about being Nyma's best friend)

keith: oh.... well, it's good that you trust each other a lot in your relationship.... you seem like a really good boyfriend

lance: wat the fuck did you just say.

as soon as lance explains that nyma is not his gf and they're just bffs Keith is like ohthankgod.jpg and almost accidentally asks lance on a date before he stops himself and is like.... dumb gay bitch calm DOOOWWWNN

after that it becomes very obvious that nyma and lance r just friends at least for Keith mostly through dumb shit they say to one another

lance, sitting with hunk, pidge, and Keith at the library: hey guys wanna see something cool.

pidge: go for it

lance, clearing his throat: she think she bad but I'm better, these bitches tryna play catch up-

nyma, coming out of nowhere: SHUT THE FUCK UP WHEN I'M TALKING LIL BITCH, PUT YO HEAD DOWN WHEN YOU TALK TO A PIMP-

Nyma and Lance have self-care nights every Friday, sometimes Allura or Shay will come, and very RARELY Keith if only to spend time with Lance. also? Allura and Shay are dating, die mad about it.

They do waxing, exfoliation, mud masks, moisturizing treatments, hair masks, painting nails.... need I go on. it's basically whatever they want to do that week and when Keith reluctantly agrees to participate one day Lance goes mental

lance: OK so here's what I'm thinking. it's obvious you haven't really had a self care day for a while, which is like, fine, you do you, but holy shit are your split ends bad. I was thinking maybe I could trim them and then we could do a hair mask? Oh! A face mask would be good as well, even though you've practically got perfect skin. I'd offer to wax but for first timers the pain is a bitch to handle on the face. I'm not sure if you'd be an acrylic kind of guy but I have some black nail polish that I could put on- wow, your hands are really big compared to mine, and they're so soft, haha, isn't that crazy? so what do you think?

keith, still reeling from the fact that lance is going to touch his hair, face, and hands in the next several hours: uh......yeah..... sounds great.

nyma, sitting on lance's bed in nothing but a bra and sweatpants, smoking a blunt and readjusting her sheet mask: *long exhale* christ

Shay got Lance into the whole healthy organic food thing and in turn he got Nyma into it so they're both the bitches who drink nothing but Fiji water and almond milk and will offer you a plate of sliced cucumbers and tomatoes as a snack. we Stan a vegan couple.

keith: these are actually really good.

nyma: we usually put them on our eyes, but go off I guess.

keith:

nyma: nah I'm just fucking with you, we have different cucumbers for that

by the end of the night Keith feels like he's been cleaned by a car wash and he's dizzy from all of lance's thoughtless affection and when lance says he can stay the night because it's already late, Keith mindlessly blurts out 'only if it's with you' and nymas like.... um. Wig.

keith, laying stiff as a board on one side of lance's bed: uh

lance: oh my God you gay bitch get over here and spoon me. also kiss me on the fucking lips bro.

Nyma owns a cat named Beezer that she stole from her old roommate (rolo) but calls her beebo because quote 'beezer is so fucking lame bro i hate men'. Lance owns a Russian blue mix called, you guessed it, Blue, that he found stuck in his apartments basement only a few days after moving in. Nyma and Lance are WEAK

lance: ohhhhh look at my pretty baby sitting on the table all cute and relaxed!!! look at that baby!!! fantastic stuff!

nyma, putting her head on beebos belly: You Are So Soft And So Chubby I Would Die For You

pidge would also die for the both of them

OK I'm tired and uninspired so I'll stop here but I MAY ADD MORE LATER