#Looking back on the story I saw bits of myself in Nems and Kieran

[agentc0rn]

Another Pretty Long Character Analysis: Kieran and Nemona - Strength

disclaimer: not claiming this to be objective, just another writing piece full of thoughts done for fun because Kieran is such an interesting, in depth character ever

Okay so I mentioned this in my older post about kieran being the foil of nemona and their shared struggles with being at the top, socially excluded, and how strength as social arbiter displaced them in social settings. Like Kieran, Nemona became overly strong that no one wanted to compete and keep up with. Her passion is misread because of that plus the top statuses she holds as a wealthy multi-talented, high-achieving student. She is a good person and true to herself (her naivety to social cues perhaps is because of her lack of social connections with others). She means well and just want someone to battle with their efforts no matter the outcome and enjoy to the fullest. Battling is her expression of self, her way of enjoyment and connecting with others. Kieran is alike to an extent, with his strength already at a high level (stated by Carmen in the beginning), and his joyous expression seen during our first fight. This is supported by the fact as stated by Drayton how Kieran had fun battling pre-Teal Mask. These two rivals' love for battles run parallel with each other!

However, Kieran's transition reflects a common mindset that artists, athletes, musicians, etc. all resonate with: competitiveness + measure of worth in the things you like the most - you have to be good at them. I feel this strongly as well with art being my major source of passion - I pressured myself into thinking I had to be really good at it and not enjoy for the sake of doing it regardless of skills.

Battling was not only something Kieran liked doing, it was his main source of confidence and self-esteem.

We see that clear in Blueberry Academy, in dialogues and student culture, competitiveness is high, demanding, and brutal. Kieran may have internalized the idea, provided with his insecurity of weakness and his goal to become independent and reliant. Seeing that we were able to defeat him and sister with ease, he grew to admire but also envious of our esteemed strength, how our power seems to be favored by luck (having speical mons like Koraidon), inducing him to believe that if he worked hard, he could get to our level too. To add further, his lifelong admiration of Ogerpon supports his motivation and his aforementioned desire to be stronger. He wanted to be strong and cool as the ogre, not caring what others thought.

What I find interesting is how Kieran and Nemona handles their way of battling with us. Nemona guides you through the journey while challenging herself to learn in new ways - she restarts her journey essentially. For Kieran, even though he has experience, he struggles with the losses against us (confidence issues and again, aside our MC Role, there is some skill difference given that we fought the titans, area zero mons, team star, and gym leaders). He does change up his tactics, but ultimately does not see victory. He ends up restarting in a way back at BB academy. As a result, Kieran becomes more isolated throughout his training arc and his domination in the league. Him strictly calling out others for slacking inadvertently turns him into the fearsome "oni" figure that he idolized and thus earns him an unfavorable reputation as the president (similar status with Nemona) of the League, for instance, a dialogue between two students mentions how how ever since he became champ, the League club became less fun....Despite the contrast of tensity in these circumstances, Nemona is misunderstood in similiar manner with Kieran.

If memory serves correct, Nemona really gets into the battling mood and sometimes forgets about hers and others' limits, but does acknowledge them given a few instances when she does not battle you. Whereas for Kieran, once he entered the extreme zone, he fully devotes himself to strength at the cost of his mental, social and physical well-being. He discards his limits, giving everything he has got that ultimately eats him from the inside. The final scene when he reacts to losing may also show not just his struggle to grasp reality but a literal side effect on his health (no sleep = poor mood, poor thinking)

He desperately clings to the idea that endless training would grant him the guaranteed chance to beat you ("I know I am making the right choice") and no longer enjoys battling. Battling became a constant test of worth, the last and only means of proving himself. Even though he did become stronger, it drained his health, energy, sanity and reputation. Again, in an ironic way, he really became the oni (self filling prophecy).

at the end however, when we reach out to him to be confident in himself, that we needed his help, it gave him that confidence boost. We all believed in him - he really needed that support. Maybe seeing terapagos going berserk had him gain self awareness that he was like that too and how that caused harm to not only himself but to others.

One small thing to point out that he is like Terapagos in a way. Both are small, secluded and strong lads who end up going wayhire with their mass power.

Not to sound corny but I really felt Kieran’s frustration about losing. I was competitive too but soon let go of that. It’s fine to improve yourself but doing that to be better than others as your main reason can really cause burnout. Anyways this is a disorganized list of thoughts I wanted to share but if you read it the entire thing I really do got to say thank you for taking the time to do so.

EDIT: fixed some grammar and stuff because this was just a run-on draft lol