#Peggy Sue WWF

[ringthedamnbell]

Next In Line: Gimmicks Originally Planned For Other Wrestlers

Next In Line: Gimmicks Originally Planned For Other Wrestlers

Brian Damage Looking back at the time when Rob Van Dam was offered the gimmick of ‘Glacier’ in WCW…I started looking at other wrestlers who were offered gimmicks that they turned down. There have been many gimmicked wrestlers over the years. Some have worked well, while others failed miserably. It might not necessarily been the wrestler’s fault a gimmick failed and in other cases, the gimmick…

[hart-on-my-sleeve]

I clipped out the best portions of the commentary for 3 16, but it was also hard not to clip every time Jimmy speaks so um. Welcome to Jimmy being abused by Gorilla for 5 minutes and thirty seconds. :'D

Transcript below:

Gorilla: You wrote the longest title in the history of country western music.  Jimmy: What was that, Gorilla? Gorilla: I Got Hair On My Ears And My Glasses Are Slipping Down But I Can Still See Through You, Baby. Jimmy: Cute, real cute.  Gorilla: Was that one of yours? Jimmy: Of course it wasn’t one of my records, man!

Gorilla: Unlike some of your fellows, they look for openings like that.  Jimmy: You better believe it. Kick ‘em when they’re up, kick ‘em when they’re down, baby. That’s the Hart Foundations’ motto. 

Jimmy: You have got an open invitation, Gorilla, always to come to Memphis Tennessee - My hometown, Honky Tonk’s home town because everybody knows right now Honky Land USA is going up by the seconds that we talk, baby. They’re building a big monument for Honky Tonk Man. I’ll even send our special plane - The Honky Tonk Marie - to pick you up, baby.  Gorilla: How about Peggy Sue? Can you send her to pick me up? Jimmy: WELL. Well. Peggy Sue has got a lot of things to do down there. We’ve got the Honky Land USA restaurant that we’re having Honky Burgers.  Gorilla: Oh Please -  Jimmy: Yanno a lot of kids too, they scream at Honky man and say he uh, wears grill(?) cream. It’s not grill cream, we use Honky Cream on his hair. 

Jimmy: Well I’ll tell ya, he might be one for one when this match is over with cuz it looks like ol’ SD is in a lotta trouble tonight, baby! Gorilla: It would have to be one for two. He’s O’ for one now.  Jimmy: If he’s O’ for one now, that would be one for one wouldn't it? Wouldn’t he win one and lose one, Gorilla? Gorilla: No.  Jimmy: Whaddaya mean no?! Gorilla: It’d be one win for two matches. One for two.  Jimmy: SEE!! angy noises  Gorilla: How do they count down there in Memphis anyway? Jimmy: *in the most dejected tone* ………………we count by honky numbers…. Gorilla: I guess so…

Gorilla: Talkin’ about guys that are overweight, the Anvil seems to be resemble that- Jimmy: *high pitched screm* OOOuhggH! There you go again!!! You better get off the Anvil’s case! Ima tell you somethin’ Gorilla, you’re gonna be in a lot of trouble cuz Ima tell ya, Ima tell the Anvil when I see him again- Gorilla: How can I be in trouble? 

Jimmy: That first punch that SD threw was below the Mason Dixon line, baby, that was a little bit below the belt, Gorilla.  (A/N: Oh so the Mason Dixon line thing is actually a thing he says. HM. Unfortunately the only other place I’ve heard him say this so far is uh… well not WWF lol.)

Gorilla: How about the bird man, Koko? He dances. Jimmy: Hah, come ON! Come on man, the bird man - He’s a square, he’s a nerd, man. 

Gorilla: Just a minute ago you said the referee was doing a great job - now you’re on his case. Jimmy: Now waitaminute - you’re the one who’s saying he’s doing a great job. I didn't say he was doing a great job. 

Jimmy: That’s right, you can call me the Colonel, you can call me the Mouth of the South, Gorilla, as long as ya call me somethin’, baby.  (A/N: WhAT?!?!)

Jimmy: I can be anything I wanna be! What do you mean what right do I have to be a Colonel? Gorilla: I tell ya, you could never be a big guy, i tell ya that.  Jimmy: Well maybe not that either. I only weigh 159 pounds, Gorilla. But yanno, like i said before, I’m a little bit tougher than you think I am, Gorilla. 

Jimmy: Well yanno, that’s your opinion. Gorilla: No, that’s the opinion of a lotta people!

Jimmy: Well, you know what, I knew that you’d probably grab the thing and try to run off with it and take it away from me that’s why I didn’t bring it out here.  Gorilla: I wouldn’t have run off with it.  Jimmy: I know, you’dda probably try to break it. >:I Gorilla: Youdda been wearin’ it! Jimmy: *angry laugh* Cute, real cute, Gorilla. 

Jimmy: This karate, this kung fu, this jujitsu- whatever it is, it’s illegal in wrestling.  Gorilla: Why? Because none of your guys do it? Jimmy: *high pitched squeaking* We can do it if we wanna do it, Gorilla.

Gorilla: Certainly would make an interesting combo. Jimmy: Yeah, the Laurel and Hardy of professional wrestling. (A/N: The way he says Laurel was just cute... stfu.)

Gorilla: How long has it been, Mouth? Jimmy: Well yanno, time flies by when you’re having fun- Gorilla: Couple of years now? 2 3 4 years? Jimmy: It's been about 2 and a half years, Gorilla.  Gorilla: About 2 years too long I think.  Jimmy: CUTE CUTE. REAL CUTE. 

Gorilla: Kicked right where the ramus of the mandible articulates with the mandibula fossil of the temporal bone.  Jimmy: -_- Can you repeat that one time? Gorilla: Well you get kicked right behind the ears is where it happens.  Jimmy: thank you. 

Gorilla: Got some tattoos on him as well, McDonald does. Mightta been in the Navy perhaps? Merchant marines? Or just seemed like a good idea some Saturday Night? Jimmy: Well maybe it’s a little of both- Gorilla: You got any tattoos? Jimmy: Of course I don’t have any tattoos. It’s too painful to get a tattoo put on ya. You think I’m that crazy?!

Jimmy: He’s telling the referee right now, the guy pulled his trunks - which he did. Now tell me you didn’t see it. Gorilla: I did not see it.  Jimmy: I knew you were gonna say that! Gorilla: Well you told me to say I did not see it. Didn’t you say ‘tell me I did not see that’? Jimmy: You know Gorilla, you’re getting me so confused out here. It’s no wonder why I’m eatin’ my fingernails down to my elbows, man. 

Jimmy: *laughs giddily* I love it, I love it!! 

Gorilla: Who was it that said that “Man has to know his capabilities?” Jimmy: I think I heard it somewhere, I don’t know who said it.  Gorilla: It was Clint Eastwood. (Drop kick, he nailed him with it!)  Jimmy: You mean Dirty Harry himself, huh.  Gorilla: Yes. The mayor, no less.  Jimmy: *mocking, not impressed* Ooh. 

Jimmy: Telephone, telegraph, and tele-Gorilla Monsoon. You think I’m actually gonna tell you? Gorilla: You don’t know, do you. Jimmy: NO whaddaya mean- maybe I do know!! Maybe I don’t know! But I’m not gonna tell you either way, Gorilla!!

Jimmy: But it’s also illegal, iddinit Gorilla? Gorilla: No it isn’t. You have a 5 count after you make the tag to get outta there. Jimmy: But he had a 7 count or 8 count on it, man!  Gorilla: Oh you have a stopwatch? Jimmy: I coulda gone out and got a pizza!

Jimmy: Yanno, Spivey is a pretty big boi.  Gorilla: He certainly is. Hate to have to pay for his groceries.  Jimmy: *giggles*

Jimmy: 5-6- 7- see 7 count right there!  Gorilla: You started at 5! Jimmy: WhaDAYA mean I started at 5, Gorilla! Gorilla: You’re supposed to start at 1! Jimmy: I did start at one!!! See you’re just not listening to me, man.  Gorilla: You’re right there, I’m trying not to.  Jimmy: Yanno you’re gonna be sorry one day, Gorilla, you’ve insulted me for the last time. baby.  Gorilla: No, you’re mistaken, I’ve got a lot more insults comin’ at your- directed your way. 

Gorilla: 5- 6- 7- 8- 9-10-11! Look at that! Almost a 20 count for him to get outta the ring! Jimmy: *sassy* But you started on 10. Gorilla: I started on 5 like you did. 

Jimmy: Yanno, it’s not my fault that I wasn’t big enough to be a professional wrassler.  Gorilla: You coulda been one of the great midget wrestlers.  Jimmy: Whaddaya mean midget wrestlers!!!

Jimmy: Yanno Gorilla, you're talking about wrestling though - I’ll tell you what I would like to do one day really. I would like to challenge Moolah for the Woman’s Heavyweight Championship belt.  Gorilla: She’d clean your clock for you, for sure.  Jimmy: There is no way. The only thing holding her up is her varicose veins. You know, I know it, and the people know it, baby.

Jimmy: Well see that shows how stupid Spivey really is, man. No wonder he can’t get a partner. No one wants to be with somebody that dumb.  (This is just after Mike leaves too… hm.)