#RAMBLING YIPEEE
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So you're telling me there was a manga that had all my favorite g/t tropes and I didn't know about it???
Even the megalophobia trope I'M-

#I was afraid it'd be a weird manga#BUT IT ISN'T AT ALL YIPEEE#I'M SO HAPPY#It's called godaigo daigo btw#I'm on chapter 56 and I'm loving it#It's actually a really great shonen!#with compelling characters and all and I'M!!!!#absolutely in love with it#Hopefully it ends on a good note!#Anyway why is the g/t community sleeping on this one#manga#comic#coffeh rambles
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I got diagnosed! I was diagnosed with dyslexia when I was younger, and I got reevaluated in high school. This time before I start applications for my masters I got once again reevaluated. This diagnosis came with more stuff (I got diagnosed with the impairment in math in high school), but it feels good to get a proper explanation!
#mod rambles#I guess it’s personal to share?#but idk this diagnosis made me feel really at peace#and kinda good? if that’s weird to say#so I wanted to share#I showed my bf my diagnosis#and asked him what he thought (he was the one who pushed me to therapy)#and he said#I think you’re so so silly. And I love you#we use the word silly as a term of endearment#I guess this diagnosis made me feel seen!#yipeee
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mabel podcast 🤝 the silt verses: nobody would ever talk like that but i wouldn’t want it to be written any other way
#yay yay yipeee!!!!! <- me when a character starts giving a deeply theatrical monologue about their personal headspace and also the themes o#the show#wait black sails does this to. and probably other media but those are the three that haunt my mind the most#*stares in podcast rambling*#tsv#mabel podcast#bs
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I love animal behaviors in human hybrids. I don’t know what that says about me but yay. So I’m going to ramble about my favorite animal behaviors + characters or maybe my headcanons idk.
Grian is most commonly portrayed as a bird (specifically parrot), and I love when he needs help preening. Or he’s nervously plucking feathers. He can squawk in surprise, and chirp with curiosity, quite literally.
Also otter grian is adorable, otters are known to be playful. They actually have an instinct to hold hands when falling asleep so they don’t drift away while asleep.
Etho as an Arctic fox now. I don’t know much about etho. But have you heard the noises foxes make, also to add to that have you seen how playfully they bound into leaf piles.
etho as a phantom. yes. This one is wonderful. I love any headcanons. He gets more annoyed the less someone sleeps. Or he gets more phantomy around someone with a lack of sleep.
Vampiric Mumbo!!! I love pathetic vampires! Wet cat like vampires! He feels really bad when he has to drink blood, so he just makes fake blood with redstone and milk.
so uh conclusion? I dunno I love any headcanons and hybrids.
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The Pathologic Russian and English analysis: Clara Saburova the Changeling.
Time is a flat circle, similar to a frisbee, and the world is using it to wack me repeatedly on the head with it. So anyway, I finally got my shit together and made another addition to this madness project. This time including images of both English and Russian text. Let us begin
It’s a bit… difficult to pin down what kind of person Clara is in the English translation - partially because you don’t always know for sure which Clara you’re talking to, as well as the fact that she is, most of the time, an obstacle. She seems to shift between “mean child who’s acting like she hasn’t learned about empathy yet”, “kind earnest and trying her best”, and “ominously inhuman and deceiving”. This is, obviously, because of Clara’s main schtick - the fact that there’s two of them (and also because she knows a lot more than the two other healers). Most of the time, however, she comes across as someone with either good or dubious intentions. It’s like she’s trying to help (or acting like she’s trying to help), but things keep going horribly wrong. Since we’re not playing as her, we don’t get nearly as much insight into how frightened she is and how shaky and unstable her current situation is, so she is judged by both of the healers in a very harsh way. She seems a bit verbose for a kid/teenager, however that is nothing out of the ordinary in the town on Gorkhon. Her lines, a lot of the time are either indirect or very direct jabs, so there is an impression that she thinks she is smarter than the other two and is quite fed up with them. It’s difficult to say much else about it without getting into specifics, so here we go.
As the bachelor: Clara only gets interactions on days 3, 6, 11, and 12. You might think that that would make it difficult to write about her, but wow did they put so much stuff in the very few conversations she gets to have with Daniil. There is a level of consistency between how she speaks in English and Russian here, though she seems a bit more earnest in this campaign. Like she’s trying to help, but she also thinks that Dankovsky is unable to receive the help she’s trying to give. Or unwilling. Mainly, however, in Russian there is a very weird quality to her way of speaking that I’m not quite sure carries over well to English. See, (and this is where it gets the tiniest bit anecdotal) I’ve had my fair share of hearing religious talk in Russian (but not in English, which is why I’m not sure if this is even a valid point) - I’ve been to orthodox churches, and in general Christianity is very largely propagated in the part of Russia I grew up in. So I, like presumably many others, am familiar with the very distinct way that religious figures speak. It sounds ancient, but not the same “fairy tale” ancient that I talked about before. Instead of changing the sentence structure, they utilise more biblical words in places where any other person would use regular modern words. Best way I can explain it is how someone might say “t’is” instead of “it is” but like… Religious? “For” instead of “because.” And that is the tone that Clara takes on sometimes. It meshes really well with her “divine messenger” persona, even though she still acts like a child every now and then. It’s a very unique combination that gives her way of speaking a distinct sound that exists outside of time. Overall, however, the translation was pretty close to the original Russian version, so let’s look at where these two diverge.
What’s a little weird to me here is that umm… This is the conversation Daniil has with Clara on day 3 about the Taglur and when I read this in English I was a little confused, because it sounds like the Bachelor is asking a question about Clara’s plans for making a new world or whatevsies, but… This dialogue option is one of those that immediately ends the conversation, which didn’t make sense to me at all. In Russian it’s a bit more akin to “And who’s bright idea was it to place this miracle here?” (or literally “to whose head did the idea to place this miracle here come?” A bit more confusing, but yeah) See, the word here for “miracle” is “чудо” (pronounced smth like “choodo”), which can mean miracle or wonder, but can also be a shorthand for “чудище” or “чудовище” which is a word used to describe monsters. You know. Wonder-creatures. In this context, the word “чудо” when aimed towards a person (Clara) is meant to signify someone either ugly, eccentric or nonsensical. So to sum up, the best way to understand this line is “Who’s bright idea was it to bring this weirdo here?” in which case… Yeah, I can definitely see why that would end the dialogue.
Here’s a fun little thing: I’ve mentioned before how the Haruspex defines Clara in very vague terms. Here, when the Changeling (the real one, guys, trust me) is asking the Bachelor to deal with the Changeling pretending to be her(yeah, go figure), in English she calls her a “loathsome creature”. However, in Russian she calls her (according to Google translate) an “abomination”, “filth” or (in my own translation) “grossness”, which - you guessed it - is indeed a very vague term. Regardless of who you think is talking to the Bachelor at the moment, it’s still very interesting to see, for various reasons. She also does this later in the dialogue (and the English translation ignores it again)
More out of the same dialogue tree where the Bachelor is trying to get Clara’s blood. I’ve made a point in the analysis of the Bachelor from the Changeling’s perspective, where he calls her “darling” where the original was something like “sweet/dear creature” and almost had a sombre mood to it. In this one, however, it is the complete opposite. Not only does the word he uses here actually translate the best to “darling” (or dove), but it also has the same kind of ironic connotation to it as I mentioned. In this particular scenario he almost sounds… Thuggish? The words he uses, as well as the use of the “-ка” sounds similar to the snarky, confrontational way that thugs and bandits speak in cartoons. Something like “c’mere, dear” that makes it clear you’re about to get beaten up.
Two things here: firstly, in this dialogue line Clara refers to Daniil using the informal version of “you”, while the lines said by the Changeling whose blood he doesn’t get uses the formal version. In the interaction on day 3 Clara doesn’t address him directly at all, but I think in other dialogues she also addresses him informally (It isn’t surprising to see Clara address Daniil of all people informally, because not only does she see herself as, at least in part, a tool of divine whatevertheheck, she also rightfully believes that he is an idiot. She does not need to be polite to the stupidest man this side of the Gorkhon (I say this lovingly, of course).
Secondly though, I’d like to point out the way Daniil talks to her in here, because when I did my analysis of his lines I talked about how the English translation dials down the intensity of the stuff he says. This here is a prime example, as the Russian version is not only more curt, but also uses a much more cutting insult. Of course, people are well aware of the Russian language’s rich curse word vocabulary, but it also has the wonderful capability of making non-curse words sound like the most humiliating thing ever. I think maybe it’s the way Russian combines rolled “r”s and multiple consonants (which is less prominent in English) that allows its words to have that added weight to it. Here he calls her essentially “trash”, specifically - something that’s been so torn up and worn out that it's become useless. The way the word rolls off the tongue when you say it out loud is almost like a spit in the face, and it’s not softened by calling her “little” or anything. He calls her trash. How dare.
I’m bringing this up because it has me genuinely confused? The English version makes sense, or so I thought until I read the Russian version? Because the Russian version kinda states the opposite. It says “You can’t come up with a better knife for this than a conversation - of course, only if you’re in a hurry.” Which is very different from “unless you’re in a hurry” because those meanings are like… The opposite? The English implying that a conversation is a good way to see what’s going on in her soul, but the Russian one alluding to the fact that it’s only good if you’re in a hurry? Or is she agreeing to give her blood because they don’t have time for a conversation? I don’t know. I’m confused. Help.
I think the metanarratives of pathologic are very cool, so when I read this line in English I got really excited, because I thought it might be implying that Clara is aware of the fact that the player may have died a few times during the bachelor route alone (similar to how she calls the other healers her past or future). Then I realised that it simply could’ve meant “dying” as in being close to death. Then I got excited again, because I thought the Russian version might elucidate the issue for me. And… I think I was right? I think she implies here that Daniil has died several times, although it was probably just left vague for this specific purpose. Either way, the fact that it can be read this way and was probably worded like this just to confuse the players (and reward those who may have been on the lookout for it) is really cool to me. Also in response to that (where in English Daniil says Clara has “a shrewd eye for human condition”) he calls her a psychologist, and then brushes her off as trying to charm him, which means we don’t get to gauge the meaning of what she was saying through his response either.
This one has a couple of fun differences. Firstly, instead of referring to the town in its “true form” Clara refers to saving it “the way that the town turned out.” This, to me, is a slight difference that paints the contradictory nature of the town in a different light. The English version claiming that it’s the town’s “true” form almost makes it seem like a design from an outside force, both bringing up vibes of intelligent design and the fact that the town was made this exact way by the children. The Russian version’s implication that the town “turned out” this way has a more “nature is a chaotic force with no purpose” vibe to it, that would more suit a person unaware of the whole “we’re dolls for a children’s game inside of a video game” thing. Maybe I’ve just gotten used to being picky about the tiniest word choices because of my studies, but I feel like this difference changes the overall vibe. Like painting with the same colour but using a different brush.
Secondly, in Russian Clara calls Aglaya’s mission “simply a performance for fools” which to me is a wonderful choice of words, given all the theatre themes included in the gameplay.
I’ve kind of set a precedent where I make all of these “translation differences” have some sort of significant meaning for the narrative, but I just think this one is genuinely cool? It’s a bit of a “same colour, different brush” situation, where the sentiment is the same, but the word choice carries a different vibe. Focusing on the last sentence here, the Changeling specifically says “You were supposed to bribe him with your honesty” instead of “get at him”. And I just think that’s neat, because like. I always thought of “getting at someone” as like… An attack or provocation? But “bribing” someone has a bit more of that slimy vibe, which clashes with “honesty” so well, and… I guess it’d technically be an oxymoron.
During the conversation in regards to Clara acknowledging Maria as a mistress, in the Russian version she frequently switches between formal and informal “yous” when talking to the Bachelor. However, as it becomes clear here, this is an instance in which instead of a sign of respect, it seems that she is referring to several people at the same time. Namely, that she is directing her words both at Daniil and Artemy. During the Bachelor’s campaign she seems to think that the Haruspex is a lost cause and they seemingly don’t interact (and she even believes that he is dead during this day), so I doubt she actually ever spoke to him about this. It’s interesting then that she still tries to convince the Bachelor, even though she often calls him a fool. Makes you wonder what the differences are between this scenario and the Changeling campaign (in which she can invite Artemy to the Cathedral on the final day fully knowing that he chooses to stay oblivious).
Here’s some silly Clara on day 12 (right after giving a whole speech about the Polyhedron) and I just wanted to point out this very fun change. Instead of saying “pretty face” she instead says “мордашка” (pronounced “mordashka”) which is a diminutive of “морда” (“morda) which is usually the word people use to refer to an animal’s face. Except it can also be used to refer to a person’s face if you’re calling them ugly. The addition of the diminutive adds a little mischievous tone to it, which turns it from ugly into a “cute” kind of thing. Like… Derpy, I guess. Anyways, I think it’s absolutely hilarious that Clara says that while also talking about the eldritch concept of being a multitude of people, or perhaps just one person controlled by the will of different people at different times (which they all are, by the way).
Big difference here that I found absolutely odd as in why they cut it out of the English version? This is from the “did you know we are toys?” dialogue tree and if you look carefully, you’ll see that there’s a bit here in Russian that for some reason wasn’t included in the English version. The last sentence after Clara says that she has an advantage. She adds “and I intend to use it.” Which like… I feel to someone who hasn’t played patho before would sound antagonistic, but to those who know - this is a direct indication to how it feels like playing as Clara in the campaign. You know a lot more about the game and the characters from other campaigns. And you already know that the kids are there and that they are toys. While playing you use all this knowledge to your advantage to play the game better. So yeah, don’t know why they cut that out of the translation.
Alright, I think that’s about all I’ve got for Clara’s role in the Bachelor’s campaign. I’d say the biggest differences that I notice is, of course, the biblical language (which I didn’t get good examples of unfortunately, but the whole “your eyes are white for you are blind” is a good example) and the subtle ways in which the words Clara uses hint to her knowledge of what is going on. As always, it’s something that’s also present in the English version, but there are also things that are characteristic to the Russian language that allow her to break the fourth wall. Like, with the change to a formal “you” we can get a bit more clarity on whether the Clara we’re talking to is real or not. With the specific verbs she uses we can almost see the outline of a false bottom to everything she says and I think that’s really cool. Outside of the translations, I think it is genuinely fascinating to get a better glimpse into Clara’s story during the Bachelor campaign - I feel like if we got more of her, it would give the whole game away. In what she says already, talking about the wills behind her, behind the Bachelor (although she does count Artemy as part of the “special toys” camp, she always says it with such disappointment. Cuz she compares herself to him, but is also frustrated that he refuses to get it) she alludes to being aware of not only the stagehands, but also the player and the power that they have. It’s also really cool because you can almost compare her to Aglaya, what with all the knowledge, sacrifice, and being doomed by the narrative. Except Clara’s approach is entirely different, although it’s difficult to glimpse through her frequently changing attitude. They both know “the Law”, both talk about how miracles should not be captured - except Aglaya seeks to undo what has been done, while Clara wants to forge ahead, accept the changes as part of the world. They both seek to fix what’s wrong, but what to them is considered “fixing” is so directly opposed that they have to destroy each other. I don’t know. I just think that both of them are really cool characters that totally don’t make me wanna scream, cry, and throw up, and you know… They deserve just as much love and obsessive analysis as the men in the story (speaking of which, in one of the dialogue trees where Clara talks about Block essentially becoming a crusader she can also admit that she knows it’s not true and that he’s also doomed, but she feels so bad about it that she pretends that he isn’t. And who knows, with a miracle worker like her it might just become the truth).
Also I'm thinking of maybe at one point or another making a name pronunciation, meaning, nickname, and literary references guide? Idk, sounds like it'd be fun.
I feel like a weird little bog creature whenever I emerge with one of these. Have fun and remember to engage your critical thinking skills, fact check, and let the media you encounter change you (be it through vulnerability or empowerment) instead of just being fodder for your consumption.
#pathologic#pathologic classic hd#мор утопия#ramblings#clara saburova#daniil dankovsky#we're at 26 pages yipeee#madness project
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I saw him in my sleep last night again btw. I dont remember every detail but it was kind of like a psychological thriller and there was a lot of gore involved ?? And tom was there with me and we were all slowly going insane and killing people without wanting to and then he had to deal with the ethics of it all. Nice. As you can imagine it was killing him. I felt so bad.
#rambles#writing this here before i forget it#and now im finally going to bed for tonight. its 3 am yipeee yayy#anyway new favourite type of dream: normal insanity but tom scott is the bus driver#tom scott#tomblrs public dream diary
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happy new year to everyone !!
it’s been a while since i’ve been on here and i wanted to say i’m doing alright ^^ i missed the account but i’ve been busy getting adjusted, but i can safely say that i’m well adjusted by now >:DD
not sure if i’ll get back to posting soon but i wanted to say hi ^^
#/trau rambles#yipeee i’m aliveee#i’m slowly getting used to winter#i love cold weather#but i HATE the sun setting at 3-4pm#that’s it for the update this time around#and to the ppl who sent asks n rbs thru my hiatus#i did read all those (they pop up in my emails)
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ONE OF MY SECOND COUSINS (WHO I LITERALLY JUST MET FOR THE FIRST TIME TODAY) GAVE ME THEIR DROPOUT LOGIN AARHAGRHGH WOO HOO !!!!
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Public service announcement :]
Mod is now any pronouns :]
#dusklight ramblings#yipeee i finally figured smth about myself out!#...besides the glass child thing.
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TY 2 EVERYONE WHO VOTED BTW im awful at deciding color schemes in my designs so this helps like. a ttton LOL
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would u ever consider selling prints / do you already..
Yeah! in the future I want to make a bigger storefront but as of rn you can check out my recently updated INPRNT!!! Please check it out [:
#rosie rambles#also anon the birkin print is now up dont worry i saw the other ask!!! yipeee!!#i gotta get better at advertising these
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Hi! It's QSMPblr language day, so I wrote a little thank you message under the cut in Ukranian, enjoy :)
Привіт! Я просто хотіла написати повідомлення подяки рідною мовою, ось воно :)
Я безмежно вдячная за гостинну та теплу спільноту, яка аж ніяк не ідеальна, але на багато миль краща за більшість тих що я бачила. Я люблю Quackity Studios і їхню неймовірну роботу, яка об’єднала так багато людей і зробили те, чого не робили раніше. Їхній вплив можна побачити в усьому світі в речах, які зовсім не пов’язані з QSMP, що на мою думку вражає.
Дякуємо ВАМ, QSMPblr, за те, що ви такі ж безпечні та кумедні, як ви, і чудовим прикладом чудової спільноти, яку ми створили, є весь цей день! Я сподіваюся, що ми зможемо повторювати це навіть наступного року, і дякую вам за цей проект і спільноту! Художники, автори та звичайні блогери – усі найкращі <3
Note- Google translate into Ukranian is a bit buggy so just keep that in mind lmao
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Olive boss battle real
SCREAMS
I'd instantly lose this battle though
BUT YES NSNDX
FAN GIRLING FR RN-
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the gifsets have convinced me ..... watching interview with a vampire s1e1 rn
#if I have gained anything from watching this show via gifs on tumblr.com it is that this will ruin me#YIPEEE#iwtv#g rambles
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talked to my mum about my transition and it went really well!! shaking all over!!!
#for some reason when i get excited or nervous my whole body starts to shake#all good though!! she said that she would do some research#yayyy yipeee aghhhhh#also shout out to the gender clinic whose waiting list i've been on for 6 years!! fuck you!!#bee rambles.
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