#SHSHSHGSHG

[painted-piggy-ships-archive]

Poe, waking up from a nap and wanting to mess with Glen: Y'know, if you die, we could cremate you... put you in an hour glass. Then you'd still be able to participate in family game night.

Glen, in the other room: 😨

Glen: Glenda, will I die???

Glenda: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Glen: 😨😨

[painted-piggy-ships-archive]

Abigaile Dunsmoor

Jack Sparrow x Rex Lanning

Word Count: 935

Tag List: @ghostlyvenus @heartstringsymphonies @heavenshipped @the-schizotypal-cryptid

Summary: Abigaile becomes a part of the Black Pearl crew family! Aka; look I wrote something about fankids which is like once or twice a year shshshgshg Abbie is 9, and Briar is ~15.

Warnings: Abigaile’s a bit of a young thief, so there’s a scene with a shopkeep catching her, but it’s resolved. (By Rex pulling a gun on the man and Briar using excellent misdirection skills; the necklace is fake!)

The Black Pearl had been ported at Tortuga once again for supplies; but little did the crew know they were additionally going to gain another member. Months ago, Jack and Rex had picked up a young soul named Briar, who didn’t much care what they were referred to as, they just wanted work. Thus, they joined the crew of the Black Pearl, and quickly made a family out of the heads of the ship. Even now, Briar is considered Jack and Rex’s unofficial kid.

Rex was haggling with a farmer when a small figure darted past, catching their eye.

“Stop, thief!” A man bellowed after the obvious child. Rex payed no mind for the moment; after living with pirates for a while, you begin to realize the significance of choosing your battles. However, when the man snatched at the young girl, his meaty hand engulfing her arm, Rex lept to action, producing a pistol from their belt.

“Unhand the kid,” they commanded. The shopkeep scowled down at Rex, being a hulking figure in the market.

“Why should I? The little rat’s been abscondin’ with my supplies all month, and now I finally ‘ave her!”

“She’s only a child. Barely dressed, alone, hungry. Haven’t you anything better to do than harass her for making do with what she can?”

“I don’t give a bleedin’ shit about wha’’s happened to this kid, why do you?”

“Because Rex is kind, in spite of everything,” Briar’s voice interrupted as he appeared at his parental figure’s side, “here, I’ll make you a deal. You hand over the kid, and I will give you this.”

Briar thrust forward a necklace of pearls and opals; “I assure you, it will sell quite fabulously.”

The shopkeep looked down his bulbous nose at the necklace before dropping the girl to the ground and snatching it up greedily.

“Pleasure doin’ business witcha,” he sneered and turned on his heel. Briar stooped to help the girl up onto her feet.

“You alright?” He asked. In her hand was a- now crushed- piece of bread. She nodded feverishly.

“What’s your name?” Rex asked.

“Abigaile,” she responded quickly.

“Well, Abigaile, how do you feel about sailing the seas?”

“I'd do anythin' t' get out o' here, mister.”

Rex smiled knowingly.

“Do you want to come with us? Ah, where are my manners. I’m Rex, and this is my… protege, Briar. My partner owns a mighty fine ship, we could perhaps bring you somewhere safer, if you so desire.”

The young girl nodded eagerly this time.

“Oh please! Thank ye!” She quickly embraced Rex and they patted her hair gently before taking both children back to the Black Pearl.

“Gibbs, this is Abigaile, I believe she’s going to be sailing with us, at least for a little while,” Rex spoke promptly to Jack’s second in command, who looked warily at Briar and Abigaile.

“Rex... don't ye reckon one lost sprog be enough? 'n at least Briar can work,” he looked apologetically at the young girl, “Ah, no offense, lass.”

“I can work!” Abigaile stated desperately, “I can get into small spaces, and I’m quick, too!”

“And an excellent little thief, it sounds like,” Briar added, having heard the entire conversation before stepping in.

Gibbs sighed, “Well, thar's no point in arguin' wit' ye... it'll be in Jack's hands, then.”

Rex turned to Abigaile.

“Abbie, why don’t you go make yourself at home in the captain’s quarters, there should be something you can nibble on in Jack’s desk.”

Briar guided the girl to where Rex instructed, leaving the adults to ponder when Jack would be back from getting supplies… and if anything was holding him up. Gibbs glanced at his watch.

“Give 'im an hour?”

“Yes, and then I’ll go see if he’s holed up in a pub or not.”

~~~

Luckily, Rex did not end up having to drag their boyfriend out of a pub. He returned to the Pearl safe and sound, arms overflowing with fishing nets and the like.

“Jack, there’s something I need to talk to you about,” Rex captured his attention immediately. In his haste to hear their words, Jack nearly dropped a heavy crate onto another pirate’s foot.

“Watch it, Jack!” He growled, but was paid no mind.

“Aye, aye, wha' be it, love?” Jack asked anxiously, flittering to his partner’s side.

“You see, I had a run-in with a young thief. Some shopkeep was threatening her, so Briar and I stepped in… needless to say, she wants, and likely needs, a way out of here, and I was wondering if you’d allow her to sail on the Pearl for a time.”

Jack pondered Rex’s request.

“I... don't suppose thar's any reason nah t', so long as she stays out o' the way 'n such,” Jack decided, rubbing his goatee thoughtfully, “where be the young lass?”

“I told her she could help herself to any food she found in the cabin as she was obviously hungry.”

“I see.”

Rex led their boyfriend back to the cabin, only to find Abigaile fast asleep in his chair. Rex clucked their tongue and removed their coat to wrap around the young girl, smiling slightly to themself.

“It’ll only be until we find land and someone who will gladly take her and care for her…” they glanced at Jack, “unless you get attached.”

“Oh, poppycock,” Jack responded, flustered at the thought of being a father figure to two potentially bright children. Rex continued to smile as they left the cabin together before placing a kiss on Jack’s tan cheek.

“I’m sure whatever happens, it’ll be a fun experience nonetheless.”

[painted-piggy-ships-archive]

Ooh okay!!

What are some of your and wades nicknames??

Bonus points for logans nicknames as well!!

Wade pretty much calls me anything under the sun he can think up gsshsh, from the average, “Sweetheart, babe, etc,” to the more specific, “Raven,” and sometimes just straight-up references to things I like or reminds him of me; “Hey Edgar Allan.” “Mr. Silence of The Lambs.” (if I’m favoring the name Clarice shgshgsg)

I tend to call him, again, average things, and “Wadey-babey, red-clad menace, etc” shshshgshg

I call Logan “Grumpy Gus” very affectionately, also “Puddytat” like in the Tweetie Bird cartoons (though yes I know wolverines aren’t in the feline family shgsghshsh)

Logan’s nicknames for me are short and sweet; Crow/Raven, V, usually something relating to the name I’m using at the time <3

Once in awhile he’ll call me “Tweetie” bc of “Puddytat” but that’s a bit rare, especially in front of other people sghgshs 💕💕

ty!!!