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#Sam x Myin (Mentioned)
myinconnelly1 · 4 years
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Grown Up
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Word Count: 432
Warnings: Trigger Warnings, loss of a child, miscarriage.  Non-graphic.  Listen this one was my emotions after I lost my baby, so seriously people... it’s real with the hurt. (And no I don’t want to talk about it.  Thanks)
“I’m back,”  Dean said as he came into the bunker with the supplies from his run.  Sam looked sadly at his brother from his spot at the war table.   “Has she come out at all since we came back?”  Dean asked.
“No,”  Sam mumbled looking tired.  No one had gotten much sleep in the last two days, and the pain in the bunker was palpable.
“Why don’t you get some sleep.  I’ll go check on her.”  Dean said taking placing all but one of the bags down and going to your room.  He knocked lightly, not wanting to wake you if you were sleeping.
“Come in.”  You whispered almost inaudibly.  Dean came in with the grocery bag.
“I got you some things.”  He whispered as he moved to lay beside you on the bed.  He was careful not to touch your body, but let his fingers brush through your hair.  “Do you wanna talk about it?”  He was almost as quiet as you had been.
“No,”  Tears couldn’t fall anymore, and anger was slowly taking over for tiredness.  “I… I want to kill them all.”  Your voice rumbles.  “All of them, for taking this from me.”  You ease yourself onto your side to look at Dean.  There was smudging of your mascara around your eyes from where you hadn’t been able to wipe it clean.
“And I’ll help you, but you need to heal first,”  Dean said as he let his hand slide down your arm and ghost over the bandage on your stomach.
“Of all the bad things in this world,”  Your lips curled in the angst and hate and pain that you felt.  “I hoped that we would have this baby, and we would get the happily ever after.”  Fresh tears were forming in your eyes as the sting of loss wormed its way into your heart again.
“It was never going to be happily ever after for me.  I never had a chance to be soft. I always had bloody knuckles, scars, and shards of glass dug into my skin.  There is no apple pie life, for anyone like us.”  Dean said as his fingers locked with yours and he held them close to his chest.
“How do we move on from here?”  You whimpered, not able to keep the anger in your heart directed at the external forces.  “It’s all my fault.  I was so happy…” You trailed off as your curled onto Dean’s arm and bawled.
“It’s not your fault.  We are going to kill those monsters.  But for now, sleep.”  He affirmed, before petting your hair.
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@waywardbaby @destielhoneybee @snffbeebee @deangirl7695 @spnbaby-67 @maddiepants @tabrown2021 @ladywinchester1967 @woodworthti666 @miraclesoflove @tumbler-tidbits @emilyshurley @akshi8278 @mannls @wendibird @bobasheebaby @flamencodiva @theoneandonlymelol @chelsea072498 @donnaintx @justsomedreaming @supernaturalenchanted @kalesrebellion @prettydeaneyes @emoryhemsworth
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Myin’s gonna lay some stuff out for you guys:  hurt and pain are normal emotions that everyone suffers through, never think you are alone, no matter what that voice in the back of your mind says.  The pain or sadness you feel does matter, it is a part of your life.  But the only way to get better is to deal with it.  Honestly, pushing those feelings away might make you feel better for a time, and it might help you get back to work, or you family, and your life.  But you are never going to be back until you face your pain.  
So let’s all take Dean’s advice, Clean the Mirror.  take a good look at your life, and you scars, let the pain come to the surface, find someone who can help you, and work through your grief to become your best self, and a new self.
Good luck, from your Angst coping mechanism.
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spnfanficpond · 3 years
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Pond Diving - emilyshurley
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Welcome to today’s Pond Diving Spotlight! We hope that you enjoy this little insight to our members and perhaps even find some useful tips for your own writing. Happy reading!
Want to volunteer, send us an ask! We’re looking forward to learning more about all of you! Not sure what PD is, you can learn more here.
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Name: Emily
Age: 21
Location: India
URL: @emilyshurley​
Why did you choose your URL: Okay this is embarrassing. I was trying to sign up for AO3, so I did a quick Google search for two things, what's the name of Dean's daughter? Emma, and Chuck's last name, Shurley
I accidentally typed Emma as Emily and that's it. 
There was a very real chance that my url would have been emmashurley. Thoughts on that one? Maybe I'll change it someday. 
What inspired you to become a writer: Being an only child who wasn't allowed to watch tv for more than 2 hours. And not having friends, that also had something to do with it. 
How long have you been writing: Fanfiction? 4 years (was on Wattpad before this). In general? 12 years, I guess... I remember showing my first short story to my english teacher in 6th class. 
What do you do when you are not writing i.e. Job/Hobbies etc? Cooking, eating what I made. I don't get to cook often so I enjoy it when I can. Other than that, college takes up most of my time. Currently getting my bachelor's degree in science. It's my last year, will probably get master's in zoology next. 
How long have you been in the SPN Fandom? 4 years
Are you in any other fandoms and do you write for them? Way too freaking many. But I write for marvel and I'm thinking of re-posting the very first vampire diaries fanfic I wrote. But are people still into vampires?
Do you do any writing outside of fanfiction? If so, tell us about it? Mostly journalling, but I occasionally take part in writing competitions and things.
Favorite published author: Amish Tripathi (He mainly writes Hindu mythological fantasy? If that's anyone's jam here)
Have you ever read a book that made an impact on your life? Which one and why?: Leap of faith by Danielle Steel. Not for any reason other than the fact that it was the first novel I ever read. My grandfather was reading it, and I told him I wanted to read something too so he gave it to me. 
Favorite genre of fanfic (smut, angst, fluff, crack, rpf, etc):Platonic fluff!!!! Give me all the fics of best friends being adorable. 
Favorite piece of your own writing: Once upon a Winchester. But I gave myself so little canon to work with that I think I'll continue it after the show ends. I have to know the ending to continue it. 
Most underrated fic you have written: Letters to no one. For any marvel fans, it's a two part fic in Natasha's POV, just some letters she thought no one will ever read. 
Story of yours that you’d most like to see turned into a movie/tv show: Project Latrodectus, again marvel. I kinda feel bad for mentioning my marvel fics so much but I'm pulling influences from the story of Eklavya in Mahabharata, which is a Hindu epic so complex that I won't attempt to explain it here. 
Favorite Tumblr Writer(s): Ahh that's a tough one. I love so many people. At this point, mentioning Myin ( @myinconnelly1 ) feels like cheating because another who has ever looked at my posts can tell she's my favourite human. So I'll try not to mention her further. 
Otherwise, Beka ( @impala-dreamer), Kate ( @katehuntington​ ), @katymacsupernatural and other hoomans I can't remember because I have been away from Tumblr for a while. 
Favorite Fic from another writer: Blood and Honey by @kittenofdoomage. And the proposal by @katymacsupernatural
Favorite character to write: Marvel: Natasha Romanoff, Supernatural: I have never written Charlie but I'd love to. 
Favorite Pairing to write: So they are platonic ships but Dean and Charlie, the boys and Garth and Clint Barton and Natasha Romanoff. 
Least favorite character to write (and why): Easily John Winchester. I don't know, my brain just can't process his character. Like no matter how many times I try, John just sounds off. 
Do you have anyone you consider a mentor? Irl, my grandfather. On tumblr, Myin. I know, I know I said I won't mention her but Myin is my support system here. No matter what goes on in my brain, no idea is too crazy for her. 
Do you have any aspirations involving your writing? To make people feel less alone because I think that feels like shit. My goal moving forward is to write more Indian reader and LGBTQ reader fics because I think not many people in the fandom (that I know of) are writing those fics. 
How many work-in-progress stories do you have: Four, all of them are series. Technically 2 are my ongoing ones. And one is an MCU x SPN crossover that's taking a while to plan. 
What are you currently working on? Nothing focusing on college these days. But will write random one shots here and there.
“Pond Diving” - All About The Writing
What/who has had the biggest influence on your writing? My inability to write romance. No joke, I don't feel like I write it well. So I tend to write general fics and crack fics.
Best writing advice you've been given: Someone recommended the book, writing down the bones, to me a while ago. In the very first chapter it says, use a cheap notebook (so you don't feel guilty about 'bad writing') and a fast writing pen. 
Since most of my non fanfic writings are done by hand I like that advice.
Biggest obstacle you’ve faced in your writing: Procrastination. I'm the creator of my one misery here. I push stuff till the last moment then complain about being too busy to do anything. 
What aspects of writing do you find difficult when you write fanfiction?Smut. I can't. I don't know I like to say I don't feel comfortable writing it but the truth is I just think I'd put people off. Which is not the intended outcome. 
Is there anything you want to write but are afraid to (and why): More LGBTQ+ characters/reader inserts. Why? Say for example, even though I'm bi, but my version of bisexual Dean might not be something other people would relate to and I'm scared of accidentally offending someone. 
What inspires/motivates you to write: What if scenarios. I love speculating and coming up with the context behind what we see on screen. Like an idea that I'll one day use is, what was Sam going when Dean was in hell or purgatory. Sure in one case he hit a dog and met a girl but how? 
So I want to write more general fics or like filler between the scenes we see on the screen. 
How do you deal with self doubt: By talking to people, knowing I'm not alone in this helps. And sending fics to friends before I post them. 
How do you deal with writer's block: Play the sims. What I mean is take a break, do something completely different for a while. 
Do you plan/outline your story before you start: I don't, for one shots. For series I have to have an ending or else I'll lose interest very quickly. 
Do you have any weird writing habits: Would you consider writing/planning things on paper before writing it on the computer weird? 
Have you ever received hateful comments on your fic and how do you deal with it? I did. My very first fic on Tumblr. It was a Tony Stark x Indian!Reader fic and someone messaged me saying most content media is written for an American/Western audience. And that Tony Stark would never actually do for someone who's Indian because well Indian characters aren't primarily present in the MUC. So no one wants to read it. 
What I did about it? I deleted the fic and every backup I had of it. Because in my head they were right. All Indian get is Bruce Banner doing charity work for "all the poor Indians".
It wasn't until recently that I started talking to @desisamslut that I realised that people actually want to read about reader inserts that are like them. I mean it's called a reader insert for a reason how could I not see it?
Conversely: what’s been some of your favorite feedback on your fanfic?When someone made a mood board for my Black Widow fanfiction. 
If you could give one piece of advice to a new and/or struggling writer, what would it be? Hang in there, no matter how uncommon you think what you want to write about is, you'll find an audience. I mentioned @desisamslut in another answer, the first thing she told me was she has never seen an indian reader fic, so she felt happy when she read the one I wrote recently. 
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idreamofplaid · 5 years
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Memory
Summary: The reader gets pregnant while Sam doesn’t have a soul. When he finds out how it happened, he’s not going to like it.
Characters: Soulless!Sam x Reader; Sam x Reader; Dean and Bobby mentioned
Word Count: 3833
Warnings: Rough sex
A/N: This is a request for @myinconnelly1 . Thank you for your patience Myin ❤️
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This was the third time. They were going to figure it out soon. You’d turned down Dean’s offer of a beer twice this week. Now, he was handing you a glass of whiskey to celebrate success on your last hunt, and you shook your head giving the excuse that you had a headache.
Luckily, neither of them had been around when you’d gotten sick. But there was no way you could hide it much longer; you were going to have to tell Sam you were pregnant. He might not even remember the night you’d conceived, and part of you hoped he didn’t.
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Sam had been unusually hungry since getting his soul back. You sat at the table with him in Bobby’s kitchen watching him eat a sandwich. You’d been present when Death returned Sam’s soul to him. You’d watched him struggle against his bonds and beg for it not to happen. It had hurt, not like his behavior over the past several months, but he still looked and sounded like your Sam. All you saw was your scared and desperate Sam.
Once it was done, all Sam’s memories of his time without a soul were gone. As soon as he saw you, he pulled you close to him in an embrace that was too intimate to be called a hug. He didn’t remember it, but he felt and knew he needed you. When Sam was scared, he always reached for you.
You had dreamed of him holding you like this, having him back. You’d been there to witness Sam’s soul being restored; you knew he had it. Still, it was hard to forget when he didn’t. You remembered the things he’d said, the things he’d done.
After Sam disappeared into that hole in the ground in order to stop the Apocalypse, you had cried yourself to sleep every night. The idea of never seeing him again was bad enough, but knowing he was suffering unthinkable torments in hell was unbearable.
Dean had gone to Lisa just like he’d promised Sam he would. You had retreated to Bobby’s with a broken heart and no desire whatsoever to hunt by yourself. You spent your time reading Bobby’s lore books without the first hope of finding a way to get someone out of hell, but continuing to do research helped you feel closer to Sam.
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3 Months Ago
The sound of the Impala’s engine in the yard was unmistakable. What would bring Dean to South Dakota now? You hadn’t seen him since he’d moved in with Lisa and given up hunting; you’d barely even talked to him. You heard the front door open and footsteps moving closer to the kitchen where you were sitting with a cup of coffee and a book on Eastern European spell craft.
If you’d been paying closer attention, if you hadn’t lost your hunter’s edge, if you hadn’t been battling a depression so deep it left you struggling to care about anything since you lost Sam, you would have noticed it was two sets of footsteps getting closer to the kitchen.
Dean’s voice broke into your world of escape within the book where you didn’t have to think about the things going on around you. “Hey, Sweetheart. You have some more of that coffee?”
You looked up and had already started to nod toward the pot when you saw Sam standing there with his brother. Tears filled your eyes, and your heart began to race. What had Dean done to get him back? There were absolutely no words that could express what you were feeling. You stood slowly, mouth falling open, and went to him.
For a minute you just looked at him taking your time with each feature of his face. His eyes, at this moment, were light gray. The last time you’d seen him they’d been an amber kissed green. His dimples weren’t showing now, but you remembered how you’d loved to kiss them. You remembered how soft his lips were and how his kisses made you feel.
It was like looking at a vision, a ghost, a dream come to life. You tentatively let your fingertips brush his chest, afraid your fingers might pass right through him, and you’d find out he wasn’t there after all. You touched the soft cotton of his shirt and underneath you felt his chest, solid and real.
Sam glanced down at your hand on his chest and flashed you a smile complete with those dimples that could fill his face with sunshine, but the look in his eyes didn’t hold that kind of lightness. They were far more serious with the kind of look Sam usually reserved for the bedroom. He leaned down and whispered in your ear, “Why don’t we find somewhere to be alone tonight?”
That is how you found yourself at the Red Lily Motel with Sam and a bag of take out burgers. You weren’t much interested in the food past a quick thought about how Sam had rarely eaten burgers before. Your eyes were fixed on him, the way the veins in his forearms were so prominent and the broadness of his shoulders that would look even wider as he shed the layers of clothes he wore. Everything about him said strength.
You were drawn to him, needing to touch him, hold him. Sam’s gaze was riveted on you, and he had long since tossed the bag of burgers on the table. He advanced toward you, and you closed the remaining distance welcoming the warmth of his body and his hands at your waist. Your eyes locked on his, and you pushed the plaid from his shoulders, hands roaming over his chest covered now by only his t shirt.
Sam’s mouth covered yours, his lips and tongue claiming you again. While he kissed you, your hands ventured underneath the front of his shirt to touch his bare stomach. He moved his kisses to your neck. You could feel his smile as he talked against your neck. “Anxious, aren’t you?” He started to nibble. “I love it.”
You started to raise the hem of his t shirt, and he helped you take it off. You felt your breath catch in your throat. He was gorgeous, golden skin, every muscle in his shoulders and chest clearly defined. Then he lifted off your shirt and kissed you again while he guided you back toward the bed. When the back of your legs hit the mattress, you sat down and lay back, pulling Sam down on top of you.
His lips locked around one of your nipples through the lace of your bra. His tongue laved at it until the fabric covering it was wet. Your moans and gasps urged him on, and he tore at the cloth covering your breasts freeing them. Now that they were exposed, Sam lavished more attention on them. He sucked and licked one nipple while his fingers rolled and pulled the other until you were writhing under him, your body asking for more.
Sam stood up, kicked off his shoes, then stripped out of his jeans and underwear. He lowered his body back over yours. You never felt as small as when you were beneath Sam. When he started to bite down the column of your neck with pressure harder than a nibble but not quite hard enough to hurt, it sent shivers of anticipation across your shoulders and down your spine. Sam continued his trail of kisses and bites over your chest until he reached your nipple, took it between his teeth, and pulled.
You moaned loudly, and Sam kept going changing his bites to licks, flicking his tongue over your stomach, and making his way lower. You were nearly shaking with need for him. It had been so long, and Sam had always raved about how much he loved having the taste of you on his lips. You could practically feel his tongue sliding up through your folds until his mouth found your clit and closed around it.
Sam unfastened your jeans and pulled them quickly down your legs. You arched your back waiting for the feel of his kiss between your legs. Instead, you felt the blunt end of his cock pushing against your entrance. Your heart was ready; you wanted him.
Your body wasn’t as ready. You were wet for him, but you knew you weren’t wet enough. It had been a long time, and Sam was big. Before you could say anything, he pushed himself inside you. It burned as he stretched and filled you. Almost immediately, he started to thrust.
You dug your fingers into his shoulder and said his name. “Sam.” You winced and dug your fingers deeper into his skin. “Sam.” He didn’t seem to hear you, and you let it go. You were so happy and relieved to have him back and unable to imagine what he’d gone through in hell. If this was what he needed, you’d give it to him.
In spite of the pain, you came right after Sam did. The sounds he made when he orgasmed sent you right over the edge, the little grunts and the groans. And you knew what his face looked like even if you couldn’t see it. He’d squeeze his eyes closed. Then when he opened them, they would roll back slightly in his head. His tongue would slide out over his bottom lip before he bit it, and his chest would rise and fall faster with the increased pace of his breathing.
Sam collapsed on top of you briefly before he pulled out and rolled onto his back. You heard his arm hit the pillow over his head, and you turned toward him to snuggle into his side. Sam was a cuddler, especially after sex. This time, however, he sat up and was standing by the bed before you could process what was happening. You sat up too and reached for the sheet to cover yourself. “Sam, what are you doing?”
He brushed his hair back from his face. “I’m going to get a shower. I feel like going out. We passed a bar a couple miles back.” You watched his naked back disappear around the corner as he made his way to the bathroom.
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Sam was gone all night. You took your own shower, washing the smell of him from your skin, but you couldn’t wash the smell of him from the sheets. It was impossible to sleep, the loneliness and shock of what he’d done lay too heavily on you. You stared at the ceiling, tossed and turned, finally giving in and staring at Sam’s empty pillow. You reached out to touch it imagining how you thought this night would go.
You had dreamed of a reunion with Sam so many times when you thought you’d never see him again. You’d clutched a pillow then, hugging it tightly, when a pillow was all you had. The memory of Sam’s voice had filled your head, the sweet things he would whisper to you and the sexy things he told you he wanted to do.
All those days and nights without him, you had tried to remember his voice, tried to remember the feel of his arms around you, and the way you had always felt safe when he held you. Now, you felt empty. You were too shocked to even cry really. Tears leaked from your eyes, but the sobs stayed locked inside you. It was horrible to lose him, but to have him back and he was still lost to you?
The sound of Sam’s key in the lock caused you to wipe away the tears that were oozing from the corners of your eyes. You rolled over, clicked on the bedside lamp, looked at him and waited for some kind of explanation. He walked into the room without saying anything. Finally, you couldn’t take the silence anymore. “Sam, where have you been?”
Sam took off his jacket and tossed it on one of the chairs by the table. He came over to the bed, put his knee down on it, and leaned in for a kiss. “Did you miss me?”
You pushed against his chest. “Sam, what...? You can’t just come back in here and act like nothing happened!” He gave you his best seductive, flirty look. “Really, Sam?” That’s when you saw it. “Is that lipstick on your neck?”
Sam ribbed his fingers across the offending lip print then looked at them. He raised his eyebrows and shrugged his shoulder. “Huh.”
The words caught in your throat. When you finally found your voice, it was full of hurt anger. “Is that all you can say?”
Sam tried a sexy smile with you that wasn’t about to work. “The bartender liked me.”
Your stomach dropped. Your heart clutched tight. You weren’t even sure what you were feeling. The tears you’d tried to dismiss filled your eyes again. “Sam, you need to go.” He reached for you. You caught his hand and pushed it away. “Please. Just go. What happened to you, Sam? I don’t even know who you are anymore.”
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It wasn’t long before you found out the problem with Sam was he didn’t have a soul. You’d stayed up long nights with Dean trying to figure out how to get it back. Dean’s solution was drastic, but you both wanted Sam back desperately.
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Sam, the real one, was back now and sitting across the table smiling at you. You had the house to yourselves. Bobby and Dean were on a hunt giving you some time alone with Sam, time you needed to tell him about the baby.
When Sam finished his food, you bit your bottom lip nervously. Stalling, you asked, “Do you want anything else?”
Sam nodded, smiled just enough to let his dimples show, then looked at you with deep gray eyes. “I want you to come closer. I miss touching you, kissing you.” You missed that too, but memories of the last time you were with Sam still made your heart hurt like it had just happened.
The two of you hadn’t shared a bed or any kind of intimacy since Sam had gotten his soul back. Dean had helped you carefully and gently explain that over a year had passed. You told Sam that you needed some time, and he understood. However, that didn’t stop him from wanting to be close to you again. You wanted that too.
You stood and walked around the table. Sam turned to face you. He reached for your hand and held it. “I miss you, Y/N.”
“I miss you too, Sam.” You gave his hand a slight squeeze and sat down on his lap. His hair was almost impossible not to touch when you were this close. You gave into the urge and slid your fingers through it. Sam closed his eyes. For a few seconds you just combed your fingers through his hair and watched as a smile appeared on Sam’s face.
It wasn’t a moment you wanted to end, but the time was here that you had to tell Sam you were carrying his baby. You let your fingers slide from his hair, and when you spoke it was soft. “Sam, can we go into the living room?”
“Sure.” He put his hand on your waist as you stood up, and the smile never left his face. He had no idea what was coming.
Bobby’s red sofa was soft and well worn from years of use. You were sitting against the arm like a support to somehow hold you up and give you strength to get through these next few minutes. Sam wasn’t close enough for his body to touch yours, but you were glad he wasn’t all the way at the other end of the couch either.
You took a deep breath and looked at the man you still loved. “Sam, there’s something I need to tell you.” His eyes squinted slightly. He knew from your tone it was serious. “I...I’m pregnant.”
Sam tilted his head, processing what you had just said. Then a look of complete wonder filled his eyes. “We...when?”
You stared down at your hands folded in your lap. “As...as soon as I found out you were alive. That night. I’m about three months along.”
His smile then went straight to your heart, warming it, shattering it, and putting it back together just to stab it with more pain. “You...I can’t even tell.” He was beautiful, and it was all too much.
Memories of the night you’d made this baby with him came flooding back. You remembered the way it had felt, how the love and tenderness you’d expected wasn’t there. It was there now. Sam had the softest expression on his face you’d ever seen.
You could feel the panic bubbling up in your chest along with all the confusion. “Sam, kiss me. I need to know it’s you. I need you.”
The glow left his face. “Me?”
He moved across the couch until his thigh was against yours. He held the side of your face in his palm and touch your lips gently with his. The kiss deepened and just as you were about to let go completely and cross that line where the rest of the world disappeared, Sam broke the kiss and pulled away.
He rubbed his hand down his thigh. When he looked at you, his eyes were wide with realization. “Y/N, I’m sorry.” He hung his head and ran his hand through his hair. “You...wanted me to stop, and I didn’t. I...I for-“
You shook your head. “Sam, you didn’t. You didn’t force me to do anything. I wanted you to slow down, not stop. I never told you to stop. “
This time both of his hands went through his hair, and he hung his head even lower before he raised it with the shine of tears in his eyes. “I didn’t listen. I was rough with you.” You saw him swallow. “And then I left.”
There was a heavy silence for several seconds. Summoning all your courage, you asked him what you needed to know. “Sam, did you sleep with that bartender?” You tried to steady your breathing waiting for his answer. You closed your eyes.
Sam’s was strained and quiet. “No. Y/N, I didn’t.” Slowly, you opened your eyes. The expression on Sam’s face reflected the hurt you felt inside. “I didn’t do that.”
You could barely get the words out. “The lipstick?”
Sam looked straight into your eyes. “She was hanging all over me, kissing me, coming on to me, and I let her. But nothing happened beyond that.”
You gave a tiny nod. That made it a little better somehow, knowing he hadn’t left you alone in bed and gone directly to the bed of another woman on the night you conceived your child. You knew you could forgive him that because he hadn’t had a soul.
“Y/N, I need to know something too.” Sam’s voice was almost shaking now. “Did I hurt you?” You couldn’t lie to him, but your mouth couldn’t form the word “yes” either. You didn’t have to say anything; your silence said it. Sam scrubbed his hand down his face knowing the truth.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The next several days were filled with tears and revelations. More of Sam’s memory returned. He told you the things he’d done, clearly filled with shame about it and waiting for you to say you wanted nothing more to do with him. There had been women, a lot of them. He’d worked cases without feeling and hurt people in the process.
It was all hard to hear and even harder for him to say. The greatest pain was knowing that all that time your Sam was still in hell being tortured. That meant it wasn’t really Sam you’d been with when you got pregnant. The baby was his; it carried his DNA, but the Sam you loved had not been there when you conceived.
He already loved the baby. You caught him staring at your stomach with his eyes gone soft and a quiet little smile on his face. Sam had noticed that raspberries were your new favorite food thanks to the cravings, and he’d been to the store more than once to keep the kitchen stocked with them.
Everything he did now told you that your thoughtful and sensitive Sam was back, and you were ready to have him back in every way. He was pulling pints of raspberries out of a bag when you put your hand over his and said, “Let’s go to bed.”
Sam stopped what he was doing and scooped you up into his arms. Afternoon sunlight was streaming through the windows as he carried you up the stairs to the bedroom. He placed you gently down on the bed and traced a line down the side of your face before he kissed you.
He undressed you slowly, taking his time, and kissing every part of you he exposed. Then Sam took off his own clothes and carefully lowered himself over you. “Are you sure you want to do this?”
You rested your hand on his cheek. “Yes. Please. Give me you. I need you.”
Sam made you come twice before he entered you. The first time was with his fingers while he looked into your eyes and kept telling you he loved you. The second time was with his tongue. You were shaking and begging to have him inside you by the time he was done. You were dripping you were so ready for him.
When he entered you, Sam laced his fingers with yours. He held your hand the entire time he moved deep within you. He asked you again if you were okay, and when you hesitated with your answer because you were completely lost in him he started to pull out. “Sam, I’m fine. It’s okay.” You held onto him tighter with your arm that was free. “I love you, Sam.”
After, you lay in his arms. You nuzzled against his neck and buried your nose in the softness of his hair. “Can you forgive me, Y/N?” You moved your head laying it on his chest where you could hear Sam’s heartbeat. You lay there quietly for a few seconds before placing a kiss over his heart. Then you raised you head to look at him.
“It wasn’t you that did those things, Sam. But if you need to hear it, I forgive you.” You shifted position then took his hand and placed it over your stomach where the baby was growing inside you. “We’re going to have a baby.”
“I don’t deserve you, Y/N.”
You brought his hand that you’d placed over your abdomen to your lips and kissed it. “Sam, you sacrificed yourself for the world. No one deserves love more than you. I have you back now, and I’m going to give it to you.”
Tags: @tumbler-tidbits @oldfreakything @maddiepants @mrs-meghan-winchester @dean-winchesters-bacon @waywardbaby @evansrogerskitten @emoryhemsworth @buckyscrystalqueen @wotinspntarnation @mrsdeanfuckingwinchester @sandlee44 @cosicas-cuquis @ackleholicwinchester @akhuna01 @sorenmarie87 @coffee-obsessed-writer @speakinvain @winecatsandpizza @mirandaaustin93 @akshi8278 @its-a-spn-thing @ellen-reincarnated1967 @death-unbecomes-you @hunterscabin @timelordy-fangirl2 @stusbunker @girl-next-door-writes @mariekoukie6661 
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myinconnelly1 · 4 years
Text
Not the Man I Know
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Square Filled: Mind Control (kink)
Square filled: Damsel in Distress Ship: Michael!Dean x Myin;  Dean x Myin; Sam x Myin (Mentioned) Rating : Explicit Warnings: 18+ NSFW,  non!con; Dub!con; rape; angel Mind control; Grace abuse; reference Cheating, canon violence, canon gore Request: Hey, Uhm for your request: Maybe Mind control with Lucifer and/or Michael? Like they walk in to the reader getting dressed or showering and they try to have fun with her and mind control her into having hard sex with them?
AN:  This was everything that I hoped for and more.  I also used @impala-dreamer​ ‘s make me feel it challenge with the song Uninvited (fucking awesome song btw) Word Count: 2,021 Created for @spnkinkbingo. @spndarkbingo​
“How did you find me?”  Myin asked staring up at Dean’s face.
The pain in Myin’s shoulder was starting to fade as cold lightheadedness started to replace it.  She could feel her blood thrumming throughout her body and spots black out some of her vision.  Her breath was coming in gasps as she ran, knowing that trying to outrun the fit hunter was not a likely outcome.  She was going to need a back-up plan, assuming she didn’t just collapse.
“Please, that pathetic waste of space that this vessel calls a brother has been tracking your location.”  Dean’s voice was stiff and hard as he talked down on Myin.  Her body froze as recognition illuminated her face.  Michael.
“Myin!”  Dean was shouting her name from somewhere behind her in the forest.  She couldn’t spot, shouldn’t stop.  But she was getting tired.  There was no way that Michael had released his hold on Dean.  She knew this in her head.  Even if she had seen the familiar look in Dean’s face when she had cast her spell on him.  “Please, stop running.”
“What do you want?”  Myin’s hand reached for blindly for her gun, concealed behind the door.
“You know what I’m here for,”  Michael sneered, the expression so wrong on Dean’s face.  Her eyes widened then her fingers tightened around the grip of her pistol.
Myin fell face first into the dirt of the woods.  Exhaustion and loss of blood were taking her over.  She didn’t have much energy left, and Michael was probably right around the corner.  The spell had been accidental.  All these years with the Winchester brothers and she had stopped practicing what her father had taught her.  She was just glad she’d had the foresight to send her kids away while she was in hiding.  They wouldn’t be safe with her, not yet.  Her eyes closed, and her head turned limply against the cool earth.
Michael slammed the front door into her chest, sending her flying across the room and the gun flung back against her shoulder going off.  Myin screamed with agony as the nine millimeter round pierced cleanly through her shoulder.  You regained her awareness as Dean’s hand’s, Michael’s hand’s, gripped her arms and moved her to a kneeling position.
“You will give me what I want,”  He growled an inch from her face.  Her body quivered in fear and shock.  “I even chose to stay in this guise for you.” 
Myin hadn’t really given it any thought, but she noted now that Michael was wearing Dean’s clothes.  His flannel and jeans, as opposed to Michael’s more dandy suit and cap.
“Did you think it would impress me?”  She all but spat in his face.
“No, sweetheart,”  He fumbled with the word as if it was unfamiliar.  “That is what this pretty face would’ve called you right?  No I wore this in the hopes that you would be more receptive to my request.”
Myin stared at him numbly.  She knew what he wanted.  And she knew that she could never give it to him.  She could never betray her friends like that.  Sam especially.  She was here in hiding to keep Sam safe.
“Never,”  She growled.
“I guess I had expected you to say that,”  Michael closed the space between them and kissed her unceremoniously.  She was so stunned that she hadn’t been ready when he bit her lip hard enough to draw blood.
“Ow!” She cried as she pulled away as much as she could.
“Hm, I still don’t understand what these brothers see in you,”  He mused licking the blood on his lips.
“Myin?  Myin, wake up!”  Dean said as he shook her limp form gently.  She roused enough for panic to cross her face momentarily.  ‘No, no, no, no.  It’s okay, sweetheart.  I’m gonna save you.” 
Myin noted the tightness of bandaging on her shoulder where the gunshot wound was.  He had managed to stop her from bleeding out completely.  That didn’t seem like something that Michael would have done until after he had gotten what he wanted from her, unless she was going to die.  And while she felt pretty terrible, she didn’t think that she was that close to death’s door.
“Dean?  How?”  Myin muttered in confusion.
“You, I think whatever you did, send him away.  It brought me out,”  He was staring at her, concern etched his face.  “I think I did something horrible.  I think I killed Sam.”
Myin stared at Dean in disbelief.
“What?!”  Tears fell down her face as she thought about it.  It made sense that Michael would want Sam dead.  He was in the way, constantly causing issues for him using Dean.  And he stood between Michael and Myin.
“God, Myin.  What have I become?”  Dean looked down at his hands, which were shaking.
“It’s not your fault.  Michael was controlling you,”  She grabbed his hands.  “You can’t blame yourself.”
“But you do,”  Dean whispered.  “There is no way that you can prove to me otherwise.”
Myin didn’t hesitate.  She reached out and took Dean’s face in her hands, kissing him deeply.  It wasn’t the first time they had kissed, but Dean’s entire demeanor changed regardless.
“Neither of them recovered after what happened when Dean came back from Hell, you know?”  
Michael sounded like he was going into a long prepared speech.
“What?” Myin asked shock registering on her face briefly.
“Sam said he understood why you went to his brother, he could never blame you.  After all he was with Ruby.  But he never did forgive you.  And as for Dean, well let’s just say that I can still feel his love for you.  It hasn’t gone away, it wasn’t a one time thing,”  Michael’s voice dripped with malice.
“You don’t know what your talking about.  You have no idea what love feels like!”  She did spit in his face this time, unable to control her rage.
Michael loosed his grip on her injured shoulder and smacked her cheek with his open hand.
“Enough, you will agree to give me what I want,”  He squeezed her arm.
A light bulb went off in her mind.  He needed her permission.  Just like any angel, he needed permission to be inside her.  Even if it wasn’t possession.
“No,”  She grimaced with resolve.
Michael’s hand moved back to her injury.  And he pressed his thumb against the wound.  Myin’s eyes rolled up in her head in pain.
“Say yes.”  He growled, his lips practically against hers.
“Never.”  She barely finished getting the word out, before Michael crushed his fist around her wound.
Myin gasped, shuddered, clenched her teeth.  She refused to scream for his pleasure.
“Give in!”  Michael shouted, the wet of his lips on hers.  She panted as he clutched her harder.
“DEAN!!”  Energy surged through her body, knocking Michael away from her and sending all the items nearby to explode away from her in a wave.  Myin stood as well as she could, and bolted for the door, running for the woods.
Dean kissed her back fiercely, with a groan.
“Michael was right,”  He pulled away from her slightly and leaned his head against hers.  “I still want you.”
A last tear trickled down Myin’s cheek, before Dean eased her onto her knees and crouched behind her.  He kissed her neck, and her uninjured shoulder, as he pulled her pants and panties down.  Two of his fingers pressed into her eagerly as she heard his other hand fiddle with his belt and zipper.
Warmth permeated her skin, it wasn’t a familiar sensation, but Myin enjoyed it nonetheless.  She breathed deeply, as his fingers stroked her damp center, then he removed his fingers and she felt his cock pressed against her cunt.
“Let me in?”  Dean asked quietly.  Myin was caught off guard by the question, normally Dean didn’t stand on so much ceremony.
“Dean I want you.”  She whispered, wiggling her hips slightly.  The pain in her shoulder had ebb significantly and she felt stronger, but also almost drunk in the way that her ears and cheeks were warm.
“I need to hear you say it.  Say you want me inside of you,”  Dean’s voice was strained, with restraint Myin was sure.  Still something about this was bothering her.  Expect she felt so good, she didn’t want to be without him.
“Yes, I want,”   She gasped at the squeeze Dean gave her hip.  “I want you inside of me.”
Dean pressed into her at an agonizingly slow pace, until she felt his hips press against her backside.
“I’ve wanted this for so long,”  Dean’s voice was definitely not right, Myin realized as her head started to clear.  “I finally win.”
Michael.
He pulled out to the tip before slamming back into her completely.  Myin almost screamed in the sudden fullness.  She was screwed, but literally and figuratively.  The warmth that had been suffusing her body focused in her mind as the blue-white glow of Michael’s grace filled her being.
Myin had never felt so full in her life.  She felt stretched past her limits and tears fell from her cheeks again.  She realized Michael had healed her body to prepare for the onslaught of thrusts that he was now giving her.  Dean’s cock in her cunt slipping in her natural juices.
How had she been such a fool.  She should have known it was a trick.  He had told her that he needed her to make a child.  She assumed it was the only way that he felt he could defeat Jack.  
All she had to do was remain abstinent until Michael was gone.
She began to pant as her orgasm built slowly.  She didn’t want to cum because of Michael, even if it was Dean’s cock.  His use of the man’s anatomy was poor in comparison to Dean, but it was still good enough.
“Dean wants you to cum on his cock,”  Michael growled at your ear.  “He wants it even though he knows he isn’t in control of his body.  You humans are disgusting with all your bodily fluids and functions,”  Michael smacked her ass, in an almost Dean like fashion.  “Needing to get this man’s body inside of you to get what I need,”  He choked like he almost enjoyed it.
“If it’s so,”  Myin gasped as his hips missed the beat.  “So horrible, why do it?”
“Want you too much,”  Myin almost surfaced.  That was Dean’s voice, not Michael.
“Dean?”  She asked, hopeful.
“I’ve got you sweetheart,”  Dean reached a hand around and started to rub her clit.  “I think I beat him.”
“You,”  She sighed in pleasure as her orgasm started to crest.  “You have to pull out.”
Myin fell over the edge in orgasm.  Dean stuttered and started to pull out, but the grip of his hand on her hips redoubled and she knew Michael took over as he sunk his cock into her deeply.
“Just needed a little help figuring this body out,”  Michael’s lip curled as he held her against him.
“Hey!”  Sam’s voice echoed from somewhere behind Myin, and a sob of relief and guilt escaped her mouth as Michael dropped her onto her hands and knees.
“You’re too late.  I’ve got what I came for.”  And with that Michael left in a flutter of wings.  Myin fell to her belly in the dirt sobbing for the emotional abuse she suffered at the Angel’s hand, and for the betrayal of Sam’s love.  He would never understand, and she didn’t even know if she wanted to explain it to him.
Sam’s big hand found her body and she flinched slightly.  He pulled her clothes up gently then pulled her up into his lap to console her.
“Sam,  I’m so,”  Myin trailed off, not feeling the words she knew she needed to tell him.
“It’s okay.  I know,”  Sam rubbed his beard against the top of her head.  “You don’t need to be sorry for something that was out of your control.”
Myin couldn’t manage the strength to tell him that despite the horror of the situation, she had wanted Dean anyway.
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myinconnelly1 · 4 years
Text
A Life Unlived Ch. 3: Life Goes On Pt. 1
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Masterlist / Previous
Word Count: 1,719
A/N: Season 4! Hope you all are still enjoying this total self aggrandizement 
Warnings: no warnings
May 2008
“Sam?”  Myin asked as Sam stood at the doorway to her new home.  “What are you doing here?  I didn’t think I’d see you again.”
“Who is it, Mommy?”  Dani called from the living room where she was playing with Penny.
“I need a place to stay.  I’m sorry it’s been so long.”  Sam said.  Life had taken a hard toll on the tall man, and Myin reached out to caress his cheek.  “Please.”
“Of course.”  Myin stepped back to let him in, pulling her hand away.
“Sam!!!” Dani shrieked as she came running to the front door.
“Hey, Dani!”  Sam responded lifting her and giving her a slight twirl in the air.
“I don’t like that!  Please put me down.”  Dani squealed in delight despite her words.
“Okay.”  He gave her a quick squeeze then set her down.
“Penny, come see Sam!”  Dani giggled.  The other little girl came walking unsteadily down the hallway and stared wide-eyed at the big man.
“Hi,”  She murmured.
“Wow, she’s gotten so big,”  Sam said bending down to pick her up, but being left with his arms outstretched as she ran off.
“Penny doesn’t like anyone to pick her up,”  Dani said laughing at the look on Sam’s face.
“Come on in Sam.  Girls get your stuffed animals for a nap.”  Myin called to her daughters.
“Aw, but Sam just got here.”  Dani protested in what sounded like a regular occurrence.
“And if your good and take a nap, he might still be here when you wake up.”  Myin sighed taking the girls to their beds for sleep.
“I like the new place,”  Sam said when Myin came out of the girls’ room.  “How long have you been here?”
“I put the old place up a week after you and Dean left.  I didn’t want to be there anymore.”  Myin put on a brave face as she faced her memories.  “This place is smaller but that just makes it easier to clean.”
Sam nodded looking around the place as Myin sat next to him.
“What’s going on, Sam?  You don’t call or text for a year and suddenly your find my new address and show up here needing a place to stay?”  Myin looked at him seriously.
“Dean died last week.”  Sam’s shoulders stooped as he said the thing that he had been dreading for a while now.
“Oh, Sam.”  Myin scooted across the couch to wrap an arm around him.  “Your line of work is dangerous, I’m not gonna ask how.”
“No, it wasn’t like that.  He sold his soul.  He’s in hell, and I have to save him.  He died to save me.”  The words tumbled out of his mouth for the first time in their entirety.
“If you have to save him, why are you here?  Are you in danger?”  Myin asked cautiously.
“Actually, I was hoping that you would be able to help.  I’ve been doing research, and I’m willing to do anything.  You were always good at preparing for a test.”  Sam shrugged.
“Of course,”  Myin said again, giving him a light kiss on the cheek.  
It was weeks before either Sam or Myin came up with the first thing to try.  They had found a comfortable place, despite the grief of their situation.  In Myin’s two-bedroom home, they shared a bed out of basic necessity, and Penny and Dani were accepting of the situation in the way only children can be.
“This one requires a witch,”  Myin said hesitantly.  “You don’t have a witch.”
“Well,”  Sam gestured to her.  “Maybe your dad let something that could be helpful, and you just don’t know it?”
“I don’t know, Sam.  Magic always has a price.  Even if you don’t know what it is.  It’s not safe.”
“We have to try,”  Sam said desperately.
“I’ll look.  But no promises.”  She brushed his hair out of his face, then kissed his lips.  
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September 2008
“Bobby?”  Myin gaped as she walked away from the nurses' station in the ICU.
“Myin what are you doing here?”  The old hunter ended his call and put his phone away.
“I work here, what about you?  Do you know someone here?”  She asked looking around at the various rooms.
“Yeah my friend is here, bad accident burned her eyes.”  He muttered looking around rather paranoid.
“Come on, you can come tell me about it in my office.”  She said, then led the way to the accounts receivable department where her office was.  “Is Sam with you?”  Myin asked.
“No, I thought he was staying with you?”  Bobby asked as Myin closed the door and motioned for a seat for him to sit in.
“Not for a while,”  She said looking away for a moment.  “Is there anything I can do to help your friend?”
“No she’s a pretty normal person, just leave my name out of it,”  Bobby shooed her question away.  “Where are your girls?”
“With grandma.  They all moved nearby after everything that happened.  She understands how hard everything has been between Jay and Sam.  Dani and Penny spend a lot of time with her, while I work.”  Myin sighed at the end recomposing herself.
“You know, now that I think about it,”  Bobby looked at her with a furrowed brow.  “Your daddy was a witch of sorts wasn’t he?”  Myin looked at him eyes wide.
“I don’t do that anymore, Bobby.  Not after last time.”  She crossed her arms in front of her.
“I don’t need you to cast anything.  Maybe you can come by the Astoria Motel.  We could use some out of the box thinking,”  bobby finished rubbing his beard.
“We?”  she asked noticing the word, much to Bobby’s displeasure.
“Me and Sam, he is at the motel, I know things are hard between you too, but we are really out of our depths.  We held a Séance and some monster burned my friend's eyes out of her head.”  He whispered.
“Fine, I’ll be there when I get off work.”
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Myin stood outside the room adjusting her hair nervously.  She hadn’t seen the Impala or Bobby’s beater in the parking lot, bit knocked on the door regardless.
“Myin?”  Green eyes stared at her from beyond a cracked open door.  The chain was still attached and she could see the gun the man was holding inside the room.  She held her hands up.
“Dean?  Bobby asked me to come by,”  She whispered, unsure.  He closed the door and she heard the chain rattle before it reopened and he let her in.  “You’re alive?”  She muttered raising her hand to press it against his chest half expecting it to pass through him.
“Yeah, what are you doing here, I thought you were in Florida.”  He placed his hand over hers and pulled it from his chest.
“Needed a change of scenery.”  She was just starring at him as if she was in shock.
“I half expected you to be with Sam when we found him earlier,”  Dean chuckled as he let go of her hand finally.  “How are-”  He cut off raising his gun up at the door again as a high pitched ringing sounded and static played on the TV.  They covered their ears trying to block out the noise to no avail.  The mirror on the ceiling cracked as Dean dropped his shotgun and they both fell to their knees.
“What is that?!”  Myin shouted trying to be louder than the whine.
“Cover your head!”  Dean shouted as the windows blew out and glass sprayed them from the side.  He grabbed and arm around her middle and pulled her towards the door.  He fell mostly on top of her as the cracked glass on the ceiling fell where the had been standing a moment before.
The door to the motel busted open and Bobby was there calling for Dean as more glass threatened to fall.
“Why the hell didn’t you tell him?”  Bobby asked when they were all in Bobby’s beater and Dean has lied to Sam on the phone.
“He’d try and stop us.”
“From what?  Bobby asked
“From summoning it,”  Dean responded.  Myin stared wide-eyed at Dean.  This was not what she had signed up for.  “It’s time we face it head-on.”
“No, wait.  I just got clear of all the shit in Florida.  You will not put me of my kids in danger again.  Pull over and let me out I’ll walk.”  Myin said throwing her hands out in front of her.
“You were there with me when it attacked, you’re already a target.  You and your family are safest if we deal with this thing.”  Dean said firmly.
“I hate this plan,”  Myin muttered.
“It’s high noon baby.”  Dean grinned.  Bobby and Myin rolled their eyes.  “We got the knife, you got an arsenal in the back, and we have a witch.”
“This is a bad idea,”  Bobby agreed with Myin.  “We could use Sam for this.”
“He’s better off where he is.”  Dean murmured.
“Maybe you did the spell wrong,”  Dean offered after the group had sat in the warehouse quietly for what felt like forever.
The structure started to shake as thunder rumbled and crashed outside.
“What did you say this thing was again?”  Myin asked raising her rifle.
“I didn’t,”  Dean muttered as the doors to the building were flung open.  
A man in a trench coat walked towards them, and Dean and Bobby began firing rounds at him.  Myin gasped as she saw him, entranced by something about him, and dropped her gun.  The chambered round went off on impact and ricochet off the metal walls.
“Myin, watch where shooting!”  Dean shouted before he saw the look of aw on her face.  “Son of a bitch!”  Dean shouted.  The man stood in front of Dean and Dean stabbed him with the demon blade.
The angel removed the blade then touched Bobby’s forehead and the older man dropped to the ground.
“Bobby!”  Dean dropped to the ground to check on the old man, as the blue-eyed stranger looked at Myin.
“You’re friend is fine.”  He said.  A tear fell down Myin’s cheek as she stared at him.
“Who are you?”  Dean asked.
“Castiel,”  The stranger responded and scooped Myin up to sit here by the workbench.  “We have work to do.”
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@waywardbaby​ @destielhoneybee​ @snffbeebee​ @deangirl7695​ @spnbaby-67​ @maddiepants​ @tabrown2021​ @ladywinchester1967​ @woodworthti666​ @miraclesoflove​ @tumbler-tidbits​ @emilyshurley​ @akshi8278​ @mannls​ @wendibird​ @bobasheebaby​ @flamencodiva​ @theoneandonlymelol​ @chelsea072498​ @donnaintx​ @justsomedreaming​ @supernaturalenchanted​ @kalesrebellion​ @prettydeaneyes​​ @emoryhemsworth​ @yourdommelb​
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spnfanficpond · 4 years
Text
May 2020 Angel Fish Awards
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(New Angel Fish design by @slytherkins!!)
Every month all of you fantastic writers work your asses off to post some truly incredible stories. Our Angel Fish Awards are the way for all of us, as a community of writers and readers, to lift each other up and give praise to those who have captured our attention and deserve a few kind words.
The monthly Angel Fish Awards are peer-nominated, meaning ANYONE IN THE POND CAN NOMINATE ANY POND MEMBER’S FIC. While the Pond was founded to support the Guppies, everyone in this community deserves to be showered with love and feedback, and we hope that by opening this up as a Pond wide system, we’ll be able to share the love as far as it can go.
NOTE: WE’VE BEEN HAVING OCCASIONAL PROBLEMS WITH ASKS GOING MISSING. Please use the Submit button when submitting your nominations and make sure you’re signed into Tumblr or your URL won’t show. (If the form asks for your name and email address, then you’re not signed in.) If you like, you can also send a message to Michelle @mrswhozeewhatsis or Mana @manawhaat to check and make sure we got your submission.
Be sure to read through this whole post as people who were nominated more than once only had one tag activated for tumblr tagging purposes!
WITHOUT FURTHER ADO, HERE ARE MAY’S ANGEL FISH AWARDS!
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Nominated by @focusonspn
A Night on the Town (oneshot) by @supernatural-jackles
I completely love this fic!! Jensen is a total sweetheart, it’s really easy to read and all those words felt like only five minutes. This is everything a Jensen!girl could’ve asked for!!
Hunger (oneshot) by @impala-dreamer
HOLY. MOTHER. OF. HOTNESS. It was a fucking pleasure for my eyes to read every single word of this fic!! hot as hell, dark, Demon!Dean and in character as always.
Nominated by @mrswhozeewhatsis 
Handkerchief (oneshot) by @babypieandwhiskey
I don’t usually read RPF, but this is an AU, so I dove in. Mechanic!Jensen with a magical supply of handkerchiefs, ready and willing to clean up whatever mess I find myself in? SOLD. Sweet, appeals to my love of Jensen’s back-pocket bandannas, and it activates my competence kink! Excuse me while I go wibble in the corner.
Nominated by @supernatural-jackles
Still The One (oneshot) by @luci-in-trenchcoats
I have a lot of respect for the way Michelle writes such difficult topics. She approaches them with such grace and accuracy, that makes it all the more realistic. This series is no exception. I deeply enjoy this series and the way things are playing out between Dean and the reader. It’s an extremely heartbreaking story that most of us don’t really think about until it’s put into this kind of perspective. This one is still ongoing, and I’m extremely excited to see how she handles the rest of the story. I highly recommend checking this one out. Just heed the warnings beforehand.
Nominated by @peridottea91
Healthy Competition (Series) by @kittenofdoomage
This! Omg this series! I love it so much!! It’s slower moving but keeps you itching for the next chapter and is oh so relatable. What woman hasn’t had body image issues? And what plus sized woman hasn’t had to deal with rude jerks and bullying? This fic is actually super realistic and hits all those relatable issues. Can’t wait to read the rest!!
Dangerous Signs (Series) by @kittenofdoomage
Ok, let me start by saying that I am a sucker for a good “character transported to alt. universe/world” fic. That said, I got soooooooooo addicted to this fic! It was so well written and you could just feel the reader’s hesitation and torn emotions. Should she stay? Should go? Ugh! Fantastic!! Also, kudos for the Norse mythology!! *chef’s kiss*
Nominated by @thegirlwhorunswithwinchesters
Cotton Candy (oneshot) by @ellewritesfix05
“It was always nice knowing [...] you could always find ways to bring light into Dean’s life.”
And he damn well deserves it! This was so sweet. No one can resist that “I didn’t do it” smile of his ;)
The Oath (Series) by @thecleverdame 
This series is definitely dark, but it’s so so good. If you’re okay with reading about the heavy subjects covered in these chapters, you won’t regret giving this series a try. I can’t seem to stop diving into all of this author’s content. She’s just too good.
Choices (CYOE) by @talesmaniac89 
I’ve been excited about this impressive project since I first saw the announcement post. Though I’m ashamed to say I haven’t gotten into reading the full thing yet, I plan on making time for reading ALL the different endings. I’m excited to see the different ways in which the story plays out, depending on the brothers’ personalities. For now, I’m recommending this first chapter, the starting point, which was already a beauty of its own. If you haven’t started yet yourself, prepare to be amazed.
Not Safe (Oneshot) by @torn-and-frayed
I love this. Spicy but sweet… Is that a cringy enough way for me to try and put my thoughts into words? I also just really miss Bobby, man.
nominated by @impala-dreamer
Safe Here (series) by @because-imma-lady-assface
This is one of the greatest Dean series. Ashley writes Dean amazingly well, too well sometimes, and this series gives him exactly what he needs; a place to feel safe and find comfort. I love this one so much!
Losing You (series) by @idreamofhazel
This is a superbly done Sam series that has stuck with me for a long time. I literally can’t go into Bed, Bath & Beyond without thinking about the ending <3
nominated by @kittenofdoomage
Blind Luck (oneshot) by @crispychrissy
A great Sam x reader that hits the holy trifecta of smut, fluff, and angst.
 Blood And Water (series) by @crashdevlin
Pretty sure I’ve recc’d this before but it’s such a good series, so twisted and angsty, my dark little heart loves it. Heed the warnings!
Just Sam (oneshot) by @dontshootmespence
This might not be everyone’s cup of tea but for me, it’s perfection, because I am a kinky bitch and any other kinky bitches out there would definitely enjoy this XD
nominated by @deanwanddamons
Private Party With A Rockstar (oneshot) by @mummybear
@mummybear Has been working her butt off this month for her RolePlay May. She wrote this story for me and put me in it (my name is Sian). Rockstar!Jensen is one of my weakness’s, and she knows that, and clearly knows me very well too, as included everything I like 😉
She’s Not You by @winchest09
@winchest09 is one of my fave authors. This is a super cute, super fluffy fic which really cheered me up.
Dangerous Signs (Series) by @kittenofdoomage
I LOVED this series. it was so good and lots of fun with some very sexy going’s on. Rhi’s work is just fantastic 💕
Wedding Bells (oneshot) by @katehuntington
This one shot is super cute and fluffy! I love her writing so much and this is not exception 💕 
Not Much Left (oneshot) by @impala-dreamer
Demon!Dean is another of my weakness’s and fic really hit the spot 🥵🔥
Dear Dean (series) by @smol-and-grumpy
This series made me laugh, made me cry, made me horny and made me gasp. One of the best series I have read 💕
nominated by @emilyshurley
Jensen’s Self Care Routine (oneshot) - @luci-in-trenchcoats
It is just adorable. People taking care of themselves for their loved ones. You can’t get more fluffy.
The Proposal (series) - @katymacsupernatural (Ongoing)
If you love fake dating fics, you’ll definitely love this one. Really like the character of “the reader”.
Private Party with a Rockstar (oneshot) - @mummybear
This one is both hot and adorable at the same time
You shook me (oneshot) @myinconnelly1
It’s Myin writing Demon!Dean what more do you want? No seriously that’s the perfect combination
Dancing the Spiral (oneshot) by @myinconnelly1
One of the only times I genuinely felt like a fic was creepy in a good way. And the passing of the whole thing is great. Am I little biased because its Myin, yes but that doesn’t make the fic any less good. sure it’s on the longer side but definitely worth it.
The only exception (series) - @ne-gans and @negans-lucille-tblr
I have only read the first part so far but I had to mention it. It is a serial killer AU so read the trigger warnings just in case.
Make it Big (series)- @negans-lucille-tblr
Again I’m still catching up It’s one of those fics I thought I won’t like reading but was really glad that I started.
Cast no Shadow (series) @kittenofdoomage
It’s Rhi, I can fangirl a lot about her fics. Really enjoyed (?) (that might not be the right word) the whole fitting a new relationship in existing ones. Felt to real in a weird way. It might seem like I don’t like the fic because of how I’m wording this but that’s really not the case.
Nominated by @deanwinchesterswitch
Sunshine (oneshot) by @talesmaniac89
If you like angst, this is the fic for you. It is utterly captivating and heart wrenching. It’s a cut your heart out with a dull centuries-old wooden spoon style hurt. The use of the song lines in this fic is well thought out and poetic. Make sure to have a box of tissues handy. If you don’t at least tear up while reading this, then you don’t have a heart to cut out, and your soul is already in hell.
Choices (CYOE) by @talesmaniac89
A clever interactive series where you get to choose your favorite Winchester, and the ending of the story. This is so detailed and intriguing. I loved the story I ended up with the first time, and excitedly went back in to pick the other options. Each story was unique and well written. 
Babe I’m Gonna Leave You (oneshot) by @waywardbaby
This one shot is an absolutely stunning piece of smut. The lack of dialogue makes it that much better. All you’re left with is the option to feel the detailed emotions—sexual tension to the max.
No Words (oneshot) by @because-imma-lady-assface​
Beautiful, detailed, and heartbreaking. Dean’s pain and need for comfort are palpable, and I cried while reading it. I can’t find the proper words to describe how this fic made me feel, but man did it ever make me feel.
Sky Full of Stars (oneshot) by @smol-and-grumpy​​
This is the sequel to Something Just Like This and is just as exciting as the first series. A roller coaster of suspense. The characters continue on their journey of love, dealing with the good and bad that comes with every relationship—the perfect combination of angst and fluff with a healthy dose of smut.
Something Just Like This (oneshot) by @smol-and-grumpy
A perfect combination of big badass Dean and soft, fluffy Dean, along with all the incredible smut your little heart could desire. I usually don’t like to read a series until it is complete, because I am impatient and don’t want to wait for the next chapter to post. However, this story was intriguing and sexy, and I couldn’t keep from reading each chapter as soon as it posted and then eagerly anticipating the next.
Nominated by anon
Request 42 (oneshot) by @thegirlwhorunswithwinchesters
This was super-duper cute!! I love frustrated soon to be parents especially when one of those parents is Dean! Great work, well worth the read!
Just A Daydream (onesho) by @maddiepants
This fic is refreshing with its canon-ness! I love Sam's little dream, and you get so wrapped up in it, you forget. Absolutely masterful and HOT AS HELL! Also, Tall People, WTF? 
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Thank you all for the awesome work and great feedback!
These are not actual awards! This system is set up so everyone in the pond has a chance to share the love and promote a fic/author that has grabbed your attention. The more people that participate, and the more everyone remembers to submit their own fics after posting, the better this will be :D
THANK YOU ALL AGAIN, KEEP UP THE AMAZING WORK, AND AS ALWAYS, HAPPY WRITING!
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