#Sephiroth would be the weirdest Not-Uncle ever and that delights me immensely

[scrawnytreedemon]

im here to bother u again mutual :)

uninvited guest au where sephiroth just lives in ur house, nothing else really changes it’s just. sephiroth is now canon in real life. what would you do

personally i’d panic instantly

I HAVE BEEN BOTHERED!! God yes <333

OHOHOHOO you have. no idea how many times i have considered some batshit scenario like this.

OKAY, first off, I would panic. SECOND, why is he here??? 'Uninvited guest' implies Sephiroth has settled down here like a very big and also very deadly stray cat because I dunno, he liked the smell of our fish fingers.

I think my mother would have a very long talk with him, and ten they'd become friends. They are... very alike, in some ways. pre-Nibelheim Seph but More Well Adjusted and also a tad more carefree from age would be a good way to describe my mum, for the uninitiated. They're both very analytical, inquisitive, but also stubborn people. They? They could be a team. fuck yeah.

How my siblings would react... god knows. I think any temptation to laugh at the fact Sephiroth Real would be quashed by the fact Sephiroth Real. How good is Sephiroth with two middling-teens? I feel like they would be very Polite but also leave the room whenever they could. Mood. Maybe 'Scratch'(the older of the two) would talk with him about math and bait him into quizzes if they got more comfortable.

My cat, Fuzzy? Very wonky creachure. Might hate him and try to avoid him at first, but if Seph's good with cats, i think they'd settle in. Again, same-sorta person as my mother, only perhaps more prone to longform conversations with the boy.

I? Oh boy.

Oh boy.

As like, the only person with a comprehensive understanding of Sephiroth, as he's seen in the Compilation, I would be Piss-Terrified and also my morally-paranoid OCD would be cranked up to 100 because of the... *private* things I made regarding him, for one, cough, cough.

I'd have to reevaluate how many of my initial assumptions were correct, get guilty about that, try to figure out how to handle being around this man, get guilty about that, and avoid him as much as humanly possible unless it's to help him with settling in because I am and have always been as soon as I gained self-awareness piss-terrified of annoying anyone and everyone with my weirdly loud, energetic demeanour. If I'm lucky, maybe it'd pleasantly remind him of Zack-- Who knows.

This is without taking into effect the wider ripple effect of Sephiroth Real that would inevitably impact our neighbourhood, depending on how proactive or seclusionary this man is, nor that my mum is literally getting married tomorrow to a Bri'ish farmer, and how that'll impact the household.

Needless to say, while I can't go into too much detail because that might be a Step Too Far in terms of privacy on a joke post... The idea of my stepdad-to-be and Sephiroth chatting over machinery and animal husbandry has laughing and also oddly warm.

All-in-all, I think if he didn't pull wack shit, Sephiroth would settle in quite nicely; 7/10, might do again.

And if he doesn't like it, he can fly away.

Just don't burn down our town on the way out, you one-winged fuck.