#Shoutout to my editor he is honestly wonderful and great to work with! He is not the problem the problem is simply that we need to be done

[whenastrofell]

Everyone should just ignore me until like 7AM EST because I am this close to losing it (my fingers are touching).

[mashitandsmashit]

America’s Got Talent: Season 15 - Auditions 5

Well, for starters, Eric Stonestreet was a perfectly likable and amusing judge...Though I can't help but wonder, what with him being a member of Sofia's modern family, if this counts as nepotism...

Meanwhile, we had a man do some extreme finger snapping, which I would have given more time before buzzing out seeing that the first performer in the history of the show found success doing the same kind of act (though I won't pretend this was ANYWHERE near Badfingers' level).

An old grandma showed off her body and made a thirty-something like myself jealous, and we all laid witness to the superstar that is Serban Cioca!

And as for acts that DID make it, I'll give a quick shoutout to Art Acro, who gave us a brief snippet of an awesome act, and will most likely be placed on the chopping block come the next round...

Now for the ones that made it, AND had time dedicated to them...

10: Chef Boy Bonez. Well, I might have heard some good flows in there, but seriously, who was even listening to him!? First of all, it's hard to hear his raps over everyone shrieking and gasping, and secondly, it's kinda hard to pay attention to even the dopest of lyrics when the MC in question is jumping around looking like he took his helmet off on Mars in the movie “Total Recall”! Even if he somehow makes it past Judge Cuts, there's no way he's gonna amass the votes to go any farther than the Quarter-Finals...Though if nothing else, he's sure to go on as one of those mythical “Top 10 Rappers Eminem was Afraid to Diss”, because Marshall don't need THIS guy and his Madballs eyes rapping in his face!

9: Jesse Kramer. This guy actually has one of the best singing voices I've heard this season, though I don't think he put it to the best of use with his song choice...But as a rock fan myself who wants it to find representation again in our modern music scene, I'm in Howie's position of wanting to give him another shot regardless...

8: Annie Jones. The child singer category's looking to be pretty cutthroat this year! But this kid might actually be my favorite in the category so far! While her voice is pretty much at the same level as Roberta Battaglia and Ashley Marina, her dancing is what pushes her to the top! I guess it's no surprise that she's dressed like a Spice Girl...

7: Shaquira McGrath. A black woman with the name of a Latin popstar singing the whitest music genre of them all? Never would have expected it to work, but this lady made it work well enough that she's probably somewhere in my Top 3 favorite singers of the season so far...Though we'll see if the gimmick carries her over into later rounds...

6: Xtreme Dance Force. These guys hold the unenviable task of performing (or airing) the week after W.A.F.F.L.E. Crew blew our socks off...The super-generic name and apparently advertising the next worthless X-Men movie on their jackets (either that or they forgot to change out of them after finding out that their old name is kinda taken) doesn't help matters...But they had a lot of great precision and some creative choreography, so I suppose I did have a good time watching them, regardless of any occasional mistakes they might have suffered...That being said, Waffle's gonna DESTROY them come the live shows!

5: Lewis Shilvock. Well, it looks like we've found the next star for the “We Will Rock You” Broadway musical! Maybe that's where this talent belongs, but for the time being, I was pretty mesmerized by his crazy moves! ...And I guess his golden trousers as well...

4: Ty Barnett. While not the funniest comedian ever (honestly, who IS on this show?), he had a very cool and likable personality, and I enjoyed his rather laid-back energy...He's like the anti-Preacher-Lawson! Either way, best of luck to him!

3: Alan Silva. While I wouldn't say it was the BEST act of the night as Simon said, this was still a definite standout! Aerial acts are usually pretty hit-and-miss (usually at the same time), but there was just something about the way this guy glided around that it's kind of a shame it didn't go on a little longer! Also, story or no story, his kids are just precious! If he knows how to keep this act going, he could go very far indeed, and maybe even put his former contestant of a brother to shame!

2: Bonebreakers. Looks like contortion is a cutthroat genre this year as well! What's more shocking than Frenchie Babyy? How about four of him!? Actually, I probably wouldn't have winced quite as much if it weren't for the cracking noises the editors clearly threw in...But regardless, this was pretty mesmerizing, and I honestly look forward to seeing more from these weirdos...

1: Winston. One of the best magic tricks we've seen in recent years, and you go with a basic first-name title that could just as easily be Peter, Ray or Egon? Oh well, I guess the important thing is that not only has his young man overcome the Shin Lim Effect (which is made evident by the CONSTANT milking of his victory two years ago...Ironic, since I'm still convinced that he wasn't meant to win...), but he actually did a trick that RIVALS some of Shin's best! It was both mesmerizing (I notice that I keep using that word tonight) and kinda scary! It was like watching a trailer for a movie by Guillermo del Toro or David Cronenberg, complete with good ol' body horror! The only way it could have been better is if it ended with his whole body turning into cards and blowing away, followed by him walking back onstage like “Wassup!” Anyway, if he can avoid any Eric-Chien-level disappointments, he could do very well in this game! Let's see if he can keep magic alive on this show...

Well, it wasn't QUITE as exciting as last week, but there was plenty of variety in the acts, and I found something to appreciate in almost all of them, even the singers...And even the exceptions to that were memorable, so I would say that this was a pretty good night...

Let's see how things carry on next week without a live audience...