#Shut up don't kinkshame me

[heavenhealy]

genre: smut, porn with a bit of plot, flatmate!matty x fem!reader, dom!matty x sub!reader

summary: after a bit too much wine at a game night, you worry matty learned things he never would have never wanted to know about his flatmate, but he assures you you aren’t as weird as you think.

word count: 5.3k

warnings: this is smut, please do not read this if you're under 18 or uncomfortable with sexual content!! specific warnings include: swearing, alcohol consumption, they're both a bit self conscious but only briefly, crying, (VERY MINOR) who hurt you troupe bc I'm a whore for it, reader is worried about being kinkshamed/implications she has been in the past, dom/sub dynamics, praise, degradation (consensual), unprotected sex (don't do this), choking, spitting, hair pulling, spanking, fingering (f receiving), oral (m receiving), aftercare, fluff, matty being a little softie after sex

a/n: I haven't written anything in a while so I apologize if this is rusty! I also do not proof read so there may be some mistakes, and as always please let me know if I missed a warning and I will add it on. Happy reading! :)

"Never have I ever...." Your friend trails off, swirling the contents of her wine glass absently in her hand. Her living room is packed but all the attention is on her as she speaks. A sudden blast of nostalgia from college collides into you: you sitting in your much smaller common room with her and your group of classmates, drunk off cheap beer as you swap horror stories about professors and dating. She had always been the most gripping and magnetic person you knew. Someone who could pull all of your darkest, deepest secrets out of the folds of your mind before you even realized.

Or maybe it was the expensive wine that she always had stocked now that you were adults.

"Oh! Never have I ever made someone choke me during sex." A few flickers of laughter go up around the room, and you watch as some couples proudly throw back gulps of their drinks. Your mind whirrs, suddenly self conscious at the idea of someone seeing you take a drink, but you do it anyway. There's so many people here, and so many of them are drunk that it's unlikely anyone would remember anyway. You take a hearty gulp and feel the pleasant buzz settle in your veins, whether from the alcohol or the quiet liberation of admitting one of your darkest desires like this.

Her question seems to have inspired a new theme of the game, as the next person in line slurs, "never have I ever been spit on and liked it." Less people offer up their admittance than on the last round, and your face flushes as you try to subtly bring your glass to your mouth. Your eyes dart around, drunkenness making you feel sleepy. The room was mostly occupied by your coworkers and friends of friends, all people that you could elect to never see again if you had to, and a wash of relief has you taking another sip of wine- this one just for enjoyment.

"Never have I ever let someone I'm hooking up with come inside me." Even you have to laugh at the absurdly sexual way the game began to go, but you jovially drain the last of your wine, throwing your head back lavishly as a round of jeers go up in the circle around the coffee table.

Your head is back upright, warm and swimming with intoxication as you giggle in spite of yourself. Remnants of wine stick on your lips and you lick them, trying to pry off the last of the sweet taste. Your body feels so heavy and so light at the same time: flying and sinking with intoxication and the inherent comfort that comes with it. Your eyes flutter open, mostly because you're afraid you really could fall asleep right on the couch if you keep them shut. As soon as the visual world comes back to you, you see him.

Matty, your generous flatmate who always accompanies you to these parties when he has the time, standing just behind the seated circle of people in the game who you now notice are beginning to disperse. The sight of him is sobering. How long had he been standing there? The rest of these people were inconsequential to the rest of your life, but Matty? You share a home with him, cook each other dinner, and swap each others' laundry, and pick up medicine when the other is sick.

Nerves curl in your stomach. If he had seen all of that, he definitely would think you're a freak, a sexual deviant. Maybe he would want to terminate his lease and you would be forced to find a new place. You suddenly feel dizzy as he approaches.

Handsome as ever, he pushes a hand through his already wild curls and plops onto the couch beside you. He hums thoughtfully, examining your face closely; the flush of your cheeks, the unhinged look you're sure is present in your eyes. As hard as you try, your intoxicated mind can't comprehend the emotions showing on his own face.

About all you can muster to think is "handsomehandsomehandsome" as he worries his bottom lip between his teeth before prying the empty wine glass from your hand.

"We've got to get going," he says to someone as you stand with him, slightly wobbly in your platformed sneakers. You wave at your friend and manage to support yourself long enough to make it out of her front door. The night air is thick and sticky with humidity but Matty keeps an arm around your shoulders as you go down the stairs, silently ensuring you don't wipe out and skin your knee again.

"Thanks," you finally speak once you're onto the familiar even sidewalk back to your flat. He just hums, dark eyes sparkling under the street lamps dotted along the path.

"You didn't drink?" You ask, suddenly realizing that he seemed remarkably steady tonight.

"'course I did," he wiggles his flask from his jean pocket and waves it in front of you, "I'm just not a lightweight." You sigh, throwing your arms up dramatically. He's already giggling before you even begin to defend yourself.

"I didn't get drunk off of the one glass, Matthew! I actually had three tonight. And I didn't even get sleepy till the last one."

"Sleepy? Is that the word for it?" His voice is clipped as you make the final turn to your street, the looming complex you call home only yards away. Your brow furrows at his tone.

"What are you implying?" You stop, arms crossed defensively over your chest. He deflates, visibly dropping at your change in demeanor as if it wasn't him who caused it.

"Seriously, Y/N? We're almost home." You don't budge and he relents. "Sorry, that was rude of me. I know you're sleepy, let's go. Please? Forget I said anything." You sigh, appreciating the candid look of relief on his face when you start to walk again, all the way until you're into the safety of your bed.

---

"Oh, fuck," you grimace upon waking up. You have no idea what time it is, but sunlight is streaming in through the crack in your curtains, and you can faintly hear the sounds of the tv down the hallway. You know that your hair is tangled, and it's a miracle that you even bothered to change out of your clothes before bed.

You grasp for your phone and sit up, cursing the throbbing headache that always comes with getting wine drunk. You start picking up pieces of the night in your memory like loose change: a selfie here, a bump into a guy from accounting there, a handful of pretzels tossed into your mouth by your friend, the game of never have I ever-oh.

Shit. You swallow hard, listening for the noises downstairs, and the confirming shuffle of Matty's footsteps makes you freeze. Shit, how much had he heard? You meant to ask about it last night but lacked the cognitive ability for such a thing.

Your stomach bottoms out as you think, practicing different ways to approach it in your head.

Hey, did you hear about all of my weird sex stuff last night?

Hey buddy, learned anything about me recently that changed your view of me as a person and now you want to move out?

Hi Matty, thanks for coming with me to the party and getting us home, did you see me admit to liking being spit on?

Each idea was worse than the last, and a shiver of fear runs up your neck. You had always expected to have to deal with some differences in this living agreement, and had before, but never about something like this. Okay, maybe you could just avoid him until you came up with a good way to ask? Or maybe it would never come up at all? Perhaps he really hadn't been in the room the whole time. And worse case scenario, you have time to think about it. You could crawl right back into bed and pretend to sleep all day and-

"Y/N? You're up, right?" Matty's voice sounds from right outside the door, strong and clear. You consider ignoring him but he nudges on the door and it swings open just a bit, revealing him clutching onto a bakery to go box. He smiles bright when he sees you upright and takes a step into your room.

"Brought you a cinnamon roll,” he smiles the small, earnest smile that you don’t even think he realizes he does, and your heart melts. Surely this is a sign off goodwill.

You thank him and take the box, immediately flipping the lip open and staring down at the pastry. Your stomach rumbles at the scent so you dig in, flakes of dough falling off and back into the box as you eat. Matty stays silently in your doorway until you vaguely gesture at your bed, inviting him to sit as you chew.

He perched himself at the foot of your bed: hair messy under the hood of his favorite old sweatshirt and his hands tucked endearingly under his thighs, as if he’s waiting for something.

You finish your bite and raise an eyebrow at him, hoping that he voices whatever he wants or needs from you. Not that you didn’t love just spending time together or the random act of kindness, but faint alarm bells were still ringing at the possibility of what he learned last night. Neither of you were prudes: you’d had your fair amount of conversations about hook ups throughout your years as friends, but it still felt like a delicate line to cross.

“‘S good?” He asks, voice stunted as if he had to swallow down his nerves before he spoke. “Are you feeling okay? Not too hungover?” His eyebrows crinkle cutely as he asks, eyes roaming your face as if to make sure you’re telling the truth.

You nod your assurance. “Fine, I was mostly just hungry but you fixed that.” He echoes the grin you produce and your heart flutters. He looks so painfully domestic like this, in his comfy clothes and making sure you feel okay. Butterflies swarm in your stomach as you recall the care he took -always takes- to get you home safely.

“Good. You were...pretty blasted." You cringe, placing your head in your hands. The heat of your cheeks is strong and burning into the palms of your hands. Fear strikes down your spine, a fuzzy feeling of panic filling your mind. The question dances on the tip of your tongue.

"Hey." His fingers wrap around your wrist, tugging gently at it until you relent. The warmth of his touch lulls you a bit, but you can still feel the tears rimming your eyes. He coos, the sound a soothing balm on your heart.

"What's got you so upset? You're more than allowed to get drunk from time to time, love. I'm no saint myself." The pad of his thumb swipes gently over the vein in your arm.

"I-" one hot tear escapes you, rolling down the side of your nose. "How much did you see?" Your voice barely holds: wobbly and unsure yet you somehow find the courage to look at him: staring deep into his eyes. He looks back just as unflinchingly, studying your eyes as if he was trying to memorize their exact curvature.

His mouth opens, then closes into a frown, and a dark wave of anxiety creeps through your chest. He knows. He saw it all, and you know Matty well enough to know that he only hesitates with you when he's trying to find the right words to soften the blow. Like the time you had made horrendous tasting pasta and he pushed it around the plate until you finally asked for his honesty. He releases his hold on your wrist as you tug it away harshly, scooting further up your bed until you hit the headboard with your back.

"Sorry, I'm sorry about- if you think I'm weird and you want to leave or not live here anymore, or you don't want me to ever talk to you again-" your voice wavers and a rush of tears spill forth despite how hard you will them to stop. The idea of him never speaking to you again you makes you choke on a sob, but you can't dull the voices in your mind.

"Now why the fuck would you think that?" His voice snaps you out of your blubbering. His pretty features are marred into a scowl so deep that you gasp.

"Tell me, Y/N, why would you think that? I would never, ever-" his features shift, eyes softening. "Who made you think that way about yourself?" You try to ignore the undercurrent of anger in the question but it oddly sets you alight to hear how much he cares about this. That maybe even if he doesn't agree with your desires, he's not going to alienate you because of them.

Your tears have dried onto your cheeks, and you can feel the uneven breaths of anxiety begin to wash away as he shuffles closer until your knees touch. It still feels as if your brain is full of cotton, unable to process or produce anything meaningful to the conversation.

"I don't mind if you don't tell me who made you feel that way, but I'll be damned if I let you go on feeling' weird about it. Or alone about it. Cause you're not." You nod along listlessly as you often do when he rambles on, and with the mix of emotions rushing through you it takes you a moment to understand him. Matty traces a lazy pattern over your knee cap, eyes glued to your face as you catch up.

"Oh," it stumbles out of you before you can check yourself. "So you, like," your brain short circuits as he flashes you a dazzling smile.

"I do."

"You don't think I'm gross?" A spark of hope settles in your stomach, whether from the knowledge, or Matty's proximity, or both you aren't sure.

He licks his lips, runs his tongue over his teeth in a way that makes your heart lurch. His curls shimmy around his face as he shakes his head no, hand stilling on your knee.

"Actually quite the opposite." His lopsided grin makes you gasp, and his hand slides up the length of your leg until it's resting on the top of your thigh. He sits up onto his knees, imposing over you even on with his pajamas still on. "More surprised..." his eyes search your face, finding only awe, "happy, thrilled, elated...who would have thought my sweet little angel would be so..." he clicks his tongue, mocking as he pretends to think. Your heart rate quickens as arousal shoots through you. "Fucking dirty." He tilts his head as if speaking to a child, eyes sparkling with what you can only assume is lust.

Your mouth feels dry as your entire face and neck flush red.

"I-I, well, uhm." You gulp and he places a hand delicately on your face. You lean into the touch, no longer finding it in you to be ashamed in front of him.

"You what? Are a dirty little thing who gets off on being choked and spit on?" You nod fervently and he chuckles, winding his fingers into the hair at the base of your neck. "Gonna need some words from this pretty mouth or we aren't doing anything."

"Yes, yes! I am, Matty. C-can you please?" He tugs at your hair, sending your line of sight upwards until all you can see are his eyes and mop of curls.

"Please ruin you? Make you forget about whatever fucker shamed you for what gets you off?" All thoughts outside of Matty leave you as you whine your affirmation. The anticipation is enough to make you squirm against his hold, hot pin pricks of pleasure sparking as he pulls against your hair.

"No running now that I've got you." He smiles sinfully before pushing forward for a kiss, molding his lips against your own with ferocity that you had only imagined he would use. No matter how many times you had fantasized about kissing him you never would have expected it to feel this perfect.

He tastes like coffee and the faint staleness of his last cigarette; something so iconically Matty that it makes you want to cry. He devours you, thrusting his tongue into your mouth and holding steady on your hair to keep you exactly in place for him. Arousal roars inside of you, underwear already slicking at the show of dominance just the kiss has given you.

"Need you." You mumble it into the kiss, unable to push down your thoughts any longer. Matty relents, chest heaving just as much as your own.

"Need you," you try again, clearer this time, tugging at the strings of his hoodie. It's gone in an instant, his lean tattooed torso exposed for your viewing pleasure. Matty's hands are instantly fisting into the fabric of your old sleep shirt, stripping it as soon as you gasp out a yes. He eyeballs your tits and immediately groans, deep and guttural in a way you've never heard before. "Prettiest fuckin' girl. Look at you." The tenderness makes your heart swell as he tenderly cups your breasts in both hands, pinching at your nipples just enough to make you breathless. He places a line of kisses down your sternum and then follows the same path with a swipe of his tongue.

Shuddering, you latch onto his back and dig in with your nails, hoping to leave him with a little gift of his own. The movement presses him against you, his face buried in your stomach as he continues the sinful path of his tongue down to the elastic band of your shorts. He licks under it, being careful not to actually touch you anywhere you truly wanted him.

"Mmph, Matty, please-please please!" You moan and shiver, wriggling under his weight as he keeps you pinned down with one arm over your mid section.

He nips playfully at the skin of your stomach, "Impatient little slut, huh? Just got started on you and you're already lookin' for more." He abandons your skin completely, taking his warmth with you. A whine grumbles in your chest at the loss, but it dies in the air as you watch him shuck off his sweatpants and underwear in one go.

You can't tear your eyes away from the sight of his cock: something you'd imagined but never figured you would be lucky enough to see in person. Desire strikes through you as he settles against the bed, his lean thighs on display as he kneels on the bed.

"Can I suck your cock?" The question jumps out of you and Matty stills, seemingly shocked at your boldness. He cocks his head, biceps flexing when he wraps a hand around himself. Your mouth practically waters as he pumps himself slowly.

"Of course you can," he licks his lips as he settles into your crumpled bedsheets, spreading his legs to give you ample room to work. You spring into action, eager to repay all of the attention he's given you.

There's no time to waste once his cock is in your mouth. Your eyes water at the intrusion but you can't deny the way it makes your pussy flutter to feel so full of him. Matty gasps, lacing his fingers back through your sweaty hair and leading you further down, pressing your face into the skin of his pelvis.

A gag ripples through you and Matty groans, loosening his grip just enough that it's clear you could escape if you wished. But you don't, and you won't, as you work through the reflex with hot tears streaking down your face. Matty's breathy gasps only encourage you as you wiggle your tongue along the bottom of his cock as you suck: saliva gathering at the corners of your mouth and dripping into a sticky mess at the base of him.

"So fuckin' messy and hot, spitting all over me cause you're so desperate, is that it? Can't do anything but be stupid and drool all over my cock?" You moan at his words, bobbing your head vigorously both to show you agree with him and encourage him to say more, the nasty words flipping all the right switches in your brain.

His hips stutter up into your mouth and he huffs, pulling you off of him in painfully slow increments. You whine at the loss: throat raw and scratchy as you watch his cock shine under the light.

"Lay down," his voice is clipped and you're silently thrilled to note the shake as evidence that he was feeling just as fucked out as you.

You follow his instruction, flipping easily onto your back. He stills at the foot of your bed as you sprawl in front of him, legs parted in invitation. His chest heaves as he crowds overtop of you, heated skin against skin as he presses the length of his body onto your own. The fullness of his weight against you makes you feel fuzzy and you go lax under him, bucking your hips upwards in seek of friction over your clit.

Matty hums, his reddened lips forming into a mocking pout. "Prettiest baby ever but just so desperate," he places a kiss on your forehead and your heart flutters: eyes watering at the sweet gesture.

He catches your gaze, carefully inspecting the shine in your eyes.

"I'm okay," you voice before he can even ask, running your fingers over his jaw as you grin up at him. "Just happy." A little sly grin spreads on his lips and you can't help but return one, a giddy feeling of happiness spreading through your bones. It only makes you more ravenous for him and you whine, pushing your hips up against his own again as you attach yourself to his neck, biting a hickey into the skin just under his ear. A long moan falls from him as you work your mouth against him and your mind short circuits, in disbelief that you finally had him like this.

"Fucking quit with the hips before I explode," Matty growls, pulling away from the stimulation of your movement. You still immediately, the steel in his voice making you pliant. Apparently pleased with your behavior, Matty simply sits back, trailing his sinfully long fingers between your legs. You gasp at finally being touched, head pushing back into your pillows as Matty circles a finger around your hole, pushing in slowly as you widen your legs to allow him more access.

"Pretty little pussy, think you can handle another one?" You know he's teasing you, as he was already working another finger in alongside the first, stretching you open. The burn is deeply satisfying, liquid pleasure seeping through you as he works you open, thrumming his thumb against your clit.

"Matty, please?" You tug at the hand unoccupied with fingering you. His eyes squint in confusion at your request and you sigh, pulling his hand toward the base of your neck. His hand on your pussy stills as his mind finally catches up.

"Fuck, Y/N. You're fuckin' perfect, want me to choke you? Wanna have my hand around your neck while I fuck you stupid?." You nod dumbly, already feeling like you're on cloud nine. He moves the fastest you'd ever seen him, abandoning his work on your pussy for a threatening grip on one hip. You watch hungrily as he lines himself up with your pussy, eyes locked onto the image of his intrusion. The fullness of his cock inside of you made you keen, chest heaving as he pushes fully inside of you.

It had been a very long time since you'd been this full, and the fact that Matty was the one filling you made it even more addicting. The sheer size of his cock was enough to make you dizzy, and even more so once he finally began to move. A stream of obscenities spill out of you and Matty tsks, falling back into this dominant persona as he narrows his eyes at you, fingers dancing at the base of your neck. You swallow with harsh anticipation.

"Do I need to shut you up?" You nod eagerly, desperate to feel the strength of his hand closing around your neck. "What a dirty little girl, wantin' me to choke you when I'm already buried inside of you." His voice deepens with a groan while you plead him with your eyes, pussy throbbing around his cock at his words. His thrusts falter for just a moment as he finally relents, tightening his hold on your neck until you feel the perfect level of pressure that makes you feel perfectly floaty, nodding at him to continue his thrusts against you.

Emblazoned by the sight of his hand around your neck, Matty's hips snap into you with renewed vigor that has you rocking against the pillow, legs locked around his back. The slick sound of your pussy around him fills the room, mingling with the strangled moans that slip from both of you.

Matty pants above you, the punishing pace making your eyes roll to the back of your head. It's almost embarrassing how easily he works you up, and almost even more embarrassing how quick you are to hang your mouth open, mind blanked by the pleasure as you take everything he has to give you. He loosens his grip on your neck slightly and you whine petulantly.

"Relax, pretty. Not done with ya, hold on." Thankfully the movement of his hips doesn't even stutter as he moves his hand upwards, over the cleft of your chin before tracing the pads of his first two fingers over your bottom lip, pulling on the flesh until you open your mouth again. He smiles and lust clouds your senses as you watch his eyes crinkle.

"There's something else you want, isn't there? Something else that makes this pretty pussy all wet?" Your eyes widen, heart jumping into your throat as one of your most common wet dreams comes to life right in front of you. You try to swallow but his fingers in your mouth impede you, the tip of your tongue running over the digits.

"Wan' you to spit in my mouth," you make the sentence out with impressive clarity, especially as Matty's thrusts speed up at the confession, a deep, sustained moan rumbling out of his chest.

He slips his fingers from your mouth and immediately puts them between your bodies to thrum over your clit, slick with your own spit as they make contact. A shock runs through you, exciting every vein in your body with the whisper of your oncoming release. Despite his renewed vigor, Matty's eyes remain glued to your own as you hang your mouth open. From this angle you can see all of his pretty curls framing his face and every eyelash around his deep brown eyes. Before you even have a moment to anticipate it, a thick translucent glob of spit descends from his perfect lips and onto your waiting tongue. You swallow it eagerly as his cock twitches inside of your walls, and before you can even thank him, his hand unoccupied hand latches back onto your neck.

"I'm going to fuckin' come, shit. You're so hot." Matty's praises send you to another plane of existence as he holds you by the neck, deft fingers curling around your clit in time with his thrusts. You're sure that the sounds you're making are pathetic and embarrassing but pleasure courses through you so quickly that you can barely make out your warning that you were going to come.

Matty growls as you finally let yourself go, giving up to the monsoon of pleasure that wipes through your entire body. Your toes curl, muscles strained with the force of your orgasm as you hold him as close as possible with your legs. Matty curses, plowing into as he nears his own end. Even though you feel out of this world, you are acutely aware of everything about him; the way he pants and the rivulets of sweat that are beading down his chest, the beautiful moans that come from his bitten-red lips.

"Gonna come, can I come inside?" His desperation is making him whiny, and if you were less fucked out you would poke fun at the tone you know he would hate, but all you can think about is having his hot come fill you up.

"Yes, please! Need it Matty." A sliver of overstimulation starts to overwhelm your easy pleasure but you endure through it as you feel his cock twitch heavily inside of you before he leans into you, face buried into your shoulder as he comes. Although you mourn the loss of the face he makes, you get a beautiful sample of the moans that overtake him when he comes. The sound takes your breath away alongside the feeling of him filling you to the brim, so forcefully that you feel yourself shudder with another small orgasm as he finishes with a few more tiny thrusts of his hips. You gasp for air, immediately grappling for him to wrap your arms fully around his back.

He falls into you easily, his own chest heaving as his cock softens inside of you. You hear rather than feel him kissing over the plane of your shoulder as you float in and out of focus, exhausted and most likely dehydrated from this and the night before. Unintelligible speech rumbles against your skin, and Matty must realize that your lack of response means you aren't quite there, as he leans up onto his elbows.

You smile when you see him, face flushed and eyes heavy with fatigue.

"Handsome," you finally speak the word you held back last night and he laughs heartily as he cups your jaw as if examining you to look for damages before placing a kiss onto your lips; short and sweet and grounding.

"Glad you finally caught up, love. It was getting exhausting being the only one in the house who thought so."

You roll your eyes, finally coming back to yourself and reality.

"Last time I'll ever compliment you." Giggles continue to wrack his body as he slowly pulls out of you. The gush of your mixed arousal coming out of you makes you whine, sure that you had just ruined your sheets.

Matty looks guilty as you finally make eye contact again and you just wave him off, sitting up slowly as he flops onto the bed beside you. He looks up at you, reverently, and you blush.

"Stop that, please. Stop." Your voice is still scratchy but you can't fight the smile on your face, the undeniable hope that this wasn't just a one time freak accident.

"Stop looking at how pretty you are? Especially with that just got choked and fucked within an inch of my life glow? Nah." He casually pushes his hair off of his forehead and your body betrays your rolling eyes with a new stir of arousal.

"Seriously, though. You're hot. And pretty, and gorgeous and so fucking dirty in all the best ways."

"Stop before I barf, Matthew." You try to be petulant but can't resist his cute grabby hands as he settles you down next to him, petting gently at your temple.

"But thanks," you finally squeak out, feeling tremendously tired and satisfied as you yawn. "For being cool and doing all that and, like, not running away from me after." You feel him stiffen slightly before he goes lax again.

"Love, if I'm running anywhere, it's over to my room for us to have a clean bed to do this again."

[konigsblog]

ok orla listen up real quick I'm super drunk and I just saw that kinkshaming anon and I mean you spoke everything but I need to talk to someone so listennnn

love your blog always had and I KNEW WHAT I SIGNED UP FOR WHEN I READ YOUR POSTS IT'S LIKE THERE'S EVEN A FUCKING WARNING ABOUT IT

like can you imagine??????? JUST SCROLLING IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT.... LIKE WOW... IT MUST BE SO HARD... I MUST WRITE AN ESSAY OF HOW BADLY I'M INFURIATED BECAUSE I DIDN'T LIKE ONE OF YOUR POSTS... WOW.... (which never happened because I'm as kinky as you honestly

but like wow there's a FUVKING WARNING JUST SCROLL IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT JS TNG JNJ TKEJWOWNT I'M GOING CLINICALLY INSANE

THANK YOUU , I LOVE YOUU AND YOUR BLOG 💐!! im glad it goes through someone's head that my blog isn't suitable for people who don't like dark content, it's always been that way, they're just being ignorant, entitled, and a piece of shit to try shit on my blog for writing about what i said i would write about 😭

it must be a shocker to them, as if it's never been done before. like, a dark content/taboo blog... actually posts dark content? no way, this is insane, crazy almost. you deserve to be cancelled for actually writing about what you said you would ... this is ridiculous, unacceptable.

not too sure if that was their train of thought, and someone mentioned how they said they weren't gonna kink shame ... and then went and kink shamed. like, anon... big shocker when people have different kinks from you, it's almost as if you're not the only person in the world, the most important... and it's almost like i say that my portrayal of each character isn't accurate to how i write them in smut blurbs, use your common sense and do us a favour and shut up!!

a note to anyone thinking about writing me a whole essay about why they're unfollowing; don't. i wont read the whole thing, and infact ill probably just block you. you're not a loss to me, especially when you're saying some rude shit about MY blog. get a life, and a hobby, and maybe a pair of glasses so you can actually see what im actually gonna be writing about on MY blog 😮‍💨😮‍💨

BUT THANK YOU FOR BEING UNDERSTANDING 🩵

[dukeoftheblackstar]

So, David Bowie. The whole thing where he thought he's gone irrelevant. Thoughts?

[ *Screams* ]

I cannot link you resource atm but yes. There was a time in his life, a time in his beautiful, beautiful, beautiful colorful life that he had the AUDACITY to ask himself whether he was still relevant — the SHEER AUDACITY of this embodiment of perfection to doubt himself and his contribution to my life, your life, the sun, the moon, the stars, all the mkfn clouds and their moody bullshit, the planets, the galaxy, your mom, your dad, your dog, your cat, the serpent that hides in your basement, that bitch you wanna strangle at work —

THE UNABASHED AUDACITY OF THIS KING TO EVEN EVEN CONSIDER HIS RELEVANCY LIKE.. EXCUSE ME SIR?

I am offended. I am beyond offended. I'm telling you friend. I will square up with the king himself.

But yes, he did. And it's a beautiful thing because:

Humility. - "I've got seven days to live my life and seven ways to die."

Reflection. - "Who said, "Time is on my side?""

Acceptance of the ever changing time. - [ Oh you know this, baby. Come boogie with me. Have some bit of Ziggy ♪ ] "Pretty soon you're gonna get a little older."

He's done something. Yeah, something seemingly small but seemingly big. Massive. Global. Galactical. "[ If you skip this please I will hunt you down and make you listen to this beautiful masterpiece that is the Thin White Duke. ] "There are you, you drive like a demon from station to station. The return of the Thin White Duke, throwing darts in lovers eyes."

But still. Uncertainties though? - "Cling to me for we're like creatures of the wind".

Yes, but we push through. We hang on. - "Keep your 'lectric eye on me, babe ~ put your ray gun to my head ~ press your space face close to mine, love ~Freak out in a moonage daydream, oh yeah ♥"

We don't let our king down because he never let you down. - [ Beautiful boys and bad girls, your break time is over ♪ ~ too good to not break this because babe, dance your little dance ♥] "

And though my days were slipping by And nights so cruel I thought I'd die She danced her little dance 'til it made me cry She was shaking like this honey doing that

So dig deep. Be that bitch. Be the new killer star.

I got a better way I discovered a star I got a better way Ready, set, go I got a better way A new killer star I got a better way Ready, set, go

Be a mfkn dolphin and swim, ya cute bitch ♥ Now watch this cute ho smile and kinkshame you in jest. Listen to him laugh. Listen to him howl. Such a babe. Such a chatty king. Shut him up ♥

And then lastly ♥

You are not alone. Never alone.

This is my signature. On all emails. On everything.

Don't stay in a sad place Where they don't care how you are Everyone says 'hi'

[emi-chak]

Quickly before I forget and pass out asleep.

I dreamed there was a special fight where you could control Raphael, and ofc he considers himself a snowflake special enough to have a whole ass different UI when you select him. Sensibly the same, mind, but most of the assets were disposed differently (I should probably try to recreate it) and I think there was one additional small window for His Own Fight Log to separate himself from the others because Yes his own voice matters to him and he Wants you the Player to Pay Attention, I remember being so angry while taking screenshots to post them on Twitter, and writing "OFC HE HAS A DIFFERENT UI THIS SLUT"

And the voicelines. Fuck. The voicelines when you select him or touched some of his spells and passives (also the description were explained by himself, stuff like "*I* will do this and that, etc." yknow), they were driving me insane enough to make me go "SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP" almost all of them made me feel like I was either getting sexually harassed or kinkshamed, sometimes both.

And I was so angry, fuck. He Knows this is hype, He Knows he feels powerful to play, He Knows you need him right now even though that was a player choice. But cmon. I fucking would agree to whatever bulshit he wants my character to go through if that means I can have my hands on him (i mean what? No you didnt read that SHUT UP) and I was sitting in front of my screen like "How DARE He. him and his perpetually flaccid dick"

I can't remember all of his lines, but they where very telling of how I feel toward this goddamn character

"Can't get enough, can't you? 😏"

"You touched it. Now you'll  have  to  wait." (BRO)

*insert some of his stupid theatrical bullshit that I can't remember because this was a fucking dream*

"Bloody damn bred." (WHAT THE FUCK WAS MY BRAIN COOKING WITH THIS ONE)

*something about his dick being Not Flaccid*

*some small laughing(???)* (Was my cursor tickling him, or...? Oh no. I'm so fucked. No, fuck, that's cute. NO!!! ID RATHER WANT TO BE MOCKINGLY LAUGHED AT!!!!! AUUGGH!!!)

Anyway.

As I'm writing this, more memories of this particular part of my dream are fading. I guess I couldn't get lucid enough to take the reins of it because it switched to my usual dreams. There was a section where I had to hide under some stairs, a ghost pursuing me, glitching objects I desperately tried to stack in front of me, being told that I needed to do something I can't remember, and so on, can't remember much at this point.

I thought the Raphael part of my dream was so real. I thought I really tweeted those screenshots. I was so sure I was screaming in both my best friend's and boyfriend's dms on discord. Imagine my disappointment right now. Imagine my relief, too, because fuck no I don't want to feel more than simple amusement whenever he appears on screen.

That would be Hells.

[minnesotamedic186]

Mario + Rabbids Incorrect Quotes that me and my mutual @monsterbride99 came up with

There might be some spoilers so be forewarned-

Rabbid Peach = RP

Rabbid Mario = Remmy

Rabbid Luigi = Louie

Rabbid Yoshi = Royo

Rabbid Rosalina = Lina

RP: You ever wanna talk about your emotions Edge? Edge: No Remmy: I do- RP: I know Remmy Remmy: I'm sad- RP: I know Remmy-

*The entire team is sparring against each other for practice, then Luigi messes up* RP: LUIGI! *Everyone jumps at her yelling, then looks at her* RP, sweetly: Can you please not mess this up, we have a battle to win.

Beep-O: Um, Rabbid Luigi, what do you have there-? Louie, holding a soda can in one hand and Bedrock's hand in the other: A soda

Lina, emerging from a giant pile of bubbles in the bathroom: Welcome to Bath & Body Works-

Bowser: Hey, can I have some of that water? Edge: It's not water. Bowser: Vodka! I like your style- Edge: It's vinegar. Bowser: Wha-? Edge: It's vinegar, p***y-

Momma, sweeping all over her garage: I expel these demons of depression and sadness, in the name of our Lord and savior Meryl Streep, gET OUTTA HERE-!

Remmy: Remember one time I liked you? Cursa: No-? Remmy: Good 'cause it never happened-! *Remmy then flips Cursa off with his Dukes*

Louie: Everyone excuse my potty mouth-! Louie to Midnite probably: Shut the f**k up-! Mario, Luigi, and Peach: *shocked* Remmy: *dies laughing* RP, recording on her phone: OOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Lina, looking up from her book: Oh s**t…! Remmy: That's my brother right there-!

Royo, standing on a high ledge with Peach's Boombrella: Is this what you want-? *RP is getting it all on video while Peach worries for Royo's safety* Royo: Come on, strike me down "Augustus"-! Augie, just watching from the water: Royo: You don't have the bal- *Augie then creates a giant wave directed at Royo, electrocuting him via the Boombrella getting wet(you didn't think I was gonna stick to the script did you-?)*

Bwario: This is against my moral compass- Remmy: Your moral compass is a f***ing roulette wheel-!

RP: Why's giving Augie food so important-? Random Rabbid: Augie controls the weather

Phantom: Calling people "Daddy" is gross. Mario: Stop kinkshaming me! Phantom: Kinkshaming is my kink. Mario: …aaAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH

RP: Lina, wake up! Lina: Five more minutes… RP: You've been in a coma for two years! Lina: …okay, two more minutes-

Daphne: Edge! Is that the Heroes? I'm calling the Weed! *Daphne presses 4:20 on the microwave* Microwave: 420, watcha smokin'?

Edge: I don't wanna be cool anymore! *throws her sword and it ricochets back into her face* Edge, now on the floor: Well, I guess I don't have a choice-

Daphne to the Heroes, after capturing Momma: You're all going to Hell, goodbye!

Phantom, years after the events of Kingdom Battle: Oh hi, thanks for checking in 🎶 I'm still a piece of garbage!🎶

Remmy: Hey how much money do you have? Louie: Uh, 69 cents-? Remmy: You know what means Louie: I don't have enough money for chicken nuggets- ;-;

Lina coming into RP's room: Oh good you're not busy RP, putting on tons of mascara to try and match Edge: Actually Lina, I am busy

[rainbowxocs]

WH- DON'T KINKSHAME ME!!! SHUT UP!!! IT'S ENTIRELY NORMAL TO WANT YOUR VAMPIRE BOYFRIEND TO GIVE YOU A LIL' BITE ON THE NECK FROM TIME TO TIME

-THEO

IM KINKSHAMING.

[faunastanza]

Circlet of the Sun pt. 3

(part 2) (part 4)

Sila and Papaya go back and forth about the script some more, with Papaya repeatedly saying how much she loathes Sila but never says it to her face. They does have a funny line about how she makes an expression that doesn't make sense though.

there's an emoticon for this somewhere

The impression throughout all this ranting is that Sila likes dramatic anime-like fight scenes for her Mary Sue. Doesn't seem like a crime to me but I guess I wasn't there. She is mocked for it. More direct parallels are drawn between Glip's abusive real life dad and the real life gun he threatened his family with and this person on the internet who wrote bad stories and hurt people's feelings.

After a bunch of that, we cut back to Papaya and a new character, Jaxi, at the shop. Jaxi is a stand-in for one of Glip's real life partners Axi, I'm pretty sure. Anyway, Jaxi says that Sila came to them the next day and told them about what happened, and that Papaya really scared her when she yelled at her. They say that, knowing Glip, scaring her would have been intentional. They say Glip shouldn't be so mean to someone who's doing their best and trying to help. Glip doesn't remember yelling or why. Hey, guess what train of logic shows up again! Guess! GO ON! GUESS!!!

sure have trouble remembering when i yell at people for some reason

Papaya says she feels ashamed and starts to explain (crossed out) BLAME herself. She says she should have known better and shouldn't have yelled and just explained it calmly for the tenth time but instead she yelled. "I'm so tired of everyone being scared of me," she says. Gee, I wonder why that would be? Maybe this whole VN is a reason. Jaxi says that Sila is really scared of her and they can't think of a reason now to tell her why she shouldn't be.

We cut back to Tox and her two minions. Inkcat is called Vacuumania which makes me think of a fetish site more than a character name but hey. Toxinuate throws a pity party about how her two friends, Obverse and Vacuumania, tell her everything she does wrong and that makes her get better at things, which is a theme that came up when Tox was first introduced. This whole scene has very weird vibes since it seems like Glip is aiming this at Jaxi, their real life partner, who was talking to them completely reasonably a second ago. I don't know man. It's weird, that's what I'm saying.

i'm not talking about you, jaxi! (or am i)

Tox keeps rambling her big irritating pity party to herself about how she can't have boundaries and does everything wrong and everyone hates her yada yada we've all heard this before. It's also implied at one point that Tox should accept every kind of story/medicine people want to inflict on her, so I guess we're back to kinkshaming lol.

It goes on to touch on being cancelled again and how people blame Tox for things it totally didn't do. I'd remind you that Tox is another self-insert of Glip's but at this point you might as well assume that's a given.

step on me more plz (just kidding) (or am i)

Scissors and Inkcat, sorry, Obverse and Vacuumania actually tell her to shut up at one point which is pretty funny though.

thank you

There's some more of Selfish-Harm being a strawman villain then out of nowhere this hilarious thing.

lol what

There's a whole bunch more yelling and Selfish-Harm being evil and Selfish-Harm stabs Papaya repeatedly with very deliberate rape imagery, which is weird. She tries to explain but Selfish-Harm never listens, so she thinks of a way to make them listen.

Papaya shifts into Lily! Hey, Lily! One of the actual characters! I'm shocked. There's a bunch of rambling in the corners about Lily panicking about how she's put into a role that doesn't fit and she can't remember who she was because she keeps getting killed in someone's mind so she can never grow, because they don't know her. She'd never like someone as pathetic as you! The narration says. "You're Sylvan! You kill her in your mind! You're the one who restarts the universe everytime!"

What does it mean? It means Sila likes Lily the wrong way and writes stories about her dying, basically.

Anyway, Lily holds a baby Jupet in her hand. She says that Jupet is small, but they're a nekopossum, so that'd be why. That'd explain the fairy circle in their room as well! It does imply that maybe Lily had other children in other frequencies but who cares at this point.

hachacha

TAL's been using a laser to collect data and heal. Lily is scared of it, but it helps her. It takes away her pain and creates the wall out of the inability to feel pain. This is the quarantine line, it says. The quarantine line for paranoia! What does it mean. Someone says that you've lost the Heaven's Keys, and that Clear Watching is an underground prison on one of the Keys.

Glip and Lily go into the Keys. Glip says they found an anomaly, and we get a shot of Jupet with an X over their head. No one remembered them, they became a child of the story, never to have been, it says (what). There's then an odd panel with someone rambling, Glip I think, saying you're a terrifying person and that writing about their own character in their own story fills them with dread, so they're going to kill her off for good. I assume this is about Sila. Glip throws Lily into Clear Watching, WHERE ANGELS GO TO DIE.

Anyway, we have a frequency shift from Andre to Sample, because great, whatever that means, and cut to Amdusias pony, now named Sinpony. Beleth is talking to her, but they have a new form now with a diamond over their eye. Another AU form of Beleth. Sigh.

Beleth thinks about how they're so cool and that they can beat anyone up with their three favorite toys. They call them and Tox, Obverse, and Vacuumania show up, baffled. Sila is there again, saying Sinpony belongs to her, and Beleth squares off to fight.

We then get a card saying it's the end of part one and Papaya never wrote the second part because Sila attacked her. It's a poor workman that blames their tools, you know.

:3c

We go to Callclout writhing in pain from Bugsy's rule, yada yada. They try to figure out a way to get out from under it. There's another childish "this is you!" moment with Glip introducing another new dumb angel, Socketpuppet.

wait i'm missing a thumb

As you might guess, Socketpuppet puts on puppets of other characters and pretends to be them. Socketpuppet pretends to be Papaya for a while and I'm not really sure who's talking. Of note though is that Glip again gets defensive about people hating on Call-Clout and says they'll kill off Lily and Neon if it continues. okay.

how to respond to criticism

The voice, Glip I assume, declares Rule Zero, that you (Sila I assume) can never talk to them or their friends again. I don't know why they think Sila would at this point, it sounds like it'd be the last thing on her mind. But hey.

They then explicitly blackmail Sila, saying that if Sila talks about Glip to anyone or has any bad feelings about anything in this VN, they'll kill off Lily and Neon (maybe Jupet too). They get really defensive about Call-Clout again which is hilarious to me. Call-Clout, of all characters. Imagine being defensive of a character called Call-Clout IN a call-out you wrote!! it's kind of amazing.

i'm the hero!! glip says, like all the villains say, but it's different when they do it

It then says Hostage Taker, Selfish Hurt, so maybe Selfish-Hurt is threatening this to... who? Themselves? Someone else by pretending to be Glip? I don't know. Maybe they're blaming Selfish-Hurt for making them take hostages? This is a mess.

Hilariously, Glip then says that Sila made them realize that callouts are a useful tool, but they didn't want to do one. :( They just wanted to write a story about what it felt like for Sila to be a horrible creep! Look what you've made them do! This is your fault!! They say they're recovering just fine without Sila, as the VN clearly shows. No issues here.

We get a bit more clarity now with a goop like sort of Glip being confirming that they are the ones holding Lily and Neon hostage, and that if they die everyone will know it was Sila's fault and know she's a pervert who gets off on killing loving mothers. If they keep quiet then maybe Glip will keep them alive, or maybe not.

conflict resolution, by glip

Glip yells at Sila some more, then gets mad at them for driving them to do this. Sila cares more about jerking the characters around than how it hurts Glip so much when she does that! :( Glip says that this actually made them stop caring about Lily and Neon, because caring about them turned into endless suffering for Glip. I wonder if this could have been avoided if they just banned Sila when they suggested a script that creeped them out in the first place. Just spitballing though. "Who cares, it's just a comic" they say. Who cares indeed.

Glip says Sila radiates violent and murderous feelings and thinks that Sila would physically attack them if they met in real life. You're a dangerous person, Glip says, sorry you had to hear it from me. :( So they say they'll just kill Lily and Neon off right now. I mean, I guess it's not like Glip was even doing anything with them at this point, is it so much of a loss?

Just in case you were wondering, Glip then takes an opportunity to tell you how much they enjoyed writing this callout and screaming at this rando for hours. Callouts are great and cathartic! I guess people get their kicks in all sorts of ways.

call outs are great! not when they're about me though

Papaya laughs, saying that it's just a story. "Stories with no basis in reality don't matter", it says, although then it crosses "don't matter" out and replaces it with "creates that reality".

As threatened, we return to Lily and Neon. Neon says that something's been bothering her. Lily asks her what it is, while narration says THIS IS THE SCHOOLYARD DISEASE, THIS IS WHAT'S ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE DOOR. Spite, apparently. Actually that adds up.

Neon says that she's really scared of Lily, that entering this chamber with her and trying to teach her about what's going on is terrifying because she knows she looks like a traitor. Lily breaks, again, finally, whatever that means. Everyone in this comic is breaking constantly. Anyway, she doesn't know why Neon would talk about being a traitor, like she's forgotten that Neon told her exactly why. To be fair that was a pretty long time ago.

Lily wonders if Neon really feels bad about it or if it's just paranoia. Not sure how those two things are different. Why was she joking about something so serious? she wonders. Neon is a stranger, right? It gets crossed out and replaced with danger.

Neon says that this is what she's talking about, when she says again and again that she doesn't want Lily to kill her and Lily doesn't respond. Neon says she's had nightmares for years about Lily killing her (with beholding sirens involved somehow presumably) and that Lily acts like that never happened and just makes jokes and makes Neon feel good, and it doesn't add up to Neon. Neon can't tell if she's paranoid or if Lily is hiding how much she wants to kill her.

looks a bit like a rabbit

"I can feel it again, the way you hide your violent thoughts," Neon says. "You can't get mad or you'll snap and kill me, because Jupet's gone and I caused it." Not sure if this is due to the Jupet going into Beleth thing or Lily getting stuck on the wrong frequency. Neon says she can finally feel Lily's malice. She doesn't know what to do other than try to fix it, and says she'd try to fix it even if Lily wasn't here and Jupet wasn't gone, and she apologizes.

The Schoolyard Disease starts trying to take root in Lily's heart, where it would bring them full circle and begin them anew. But something about Neon said sticks with her. Had she said something new?

Lily feels ashamed of herself. She didn't think Neon would notice all of her violent negative feelings, but she did because she was scared and quiet and loving. I'll just have to take Lily's word for it. Neon noticed Lily leaking violence and hostility and somehow managed to apologize for it. That phrasing is a bit weird I think.

look into my eyes

Lily connects to the feelings she'd been lying to herself about. She'd almost scared Neon to death! This should be in its own separate VN, why it's tacked onto this rant is beyond me. No wait, it's because this scene is written out of spite, that's right.

Lily says that she's tried to kill Sylvan a hundred thousand times, but he can't die. He always comes back to life because he's a necropossum. This explains that mention of coming back to life so long ago with Jupet. Lily then says she can also never die, he can never kill her and she can never kill him. She describes it like she dies, then decides she just didn't die and ends up back here, and then takes it out on Neon. Neon also always comes back. "Are we monsters?" Lily wonders. I have to say, finding out that Lily and Neon are trapped in an endless cycle of death, murder, and rebirth with each other has made their relationship way more interesting. Oh no I'm part of the problem!!

Abruptly, they're back in the Amdusias pony form. Lily wants to say she'd never murder Neon, but she's not entirely sure that's true. She misses Jupet terribly. Lily says that she's not scared of not recognizing Jupet when she sees them again, but of them not recognizing her. She says she knows she wasn't a good mother sometimes, and wonders if that's what factored into them leaving.

She wasn't trying to blame Neon for her feelings about what Sylvan did to Jupet (will we ever find out?), and tells Neon that it's not her fault that all this happened. She's ashamed she hurt her and isn't sure what possessed her to do that.

Anyway, Sinpony collapses on the ground next to white Beleth, we're back at the end of... Schoolyard Disease? Is that the VN I'm thinking of? Anyway, Sinpony feels three other consciousnesses leave it or be forgotten. There's an odd bit about wishing for the universe to take her identity and leaving her with a life of malice for her and her child.

lily?

Not sure what to make of that. Sinpony talks to Beleth like they're her child but doesn't know why. This freaks Beleth out a bit. They say Beleth's memory isn't all there and they shouldn't play dumb, asking why they're playing the same tricks as their father ("may i remind you what a horrible monster he is?"). They weren't always a doll and they can't keep this charade up, Sinpony says.

Beleth breaks (everyone breaks!) and realizes that they don't have a childhood or a past and that maybe something's controlling them. They realize their body is indestructible and that's boring and wonder what death is like, then flip out at Sinpony and threaten to kill them for "touching her memory." Sinpony is terrified and has no idea what they're talking about. Unable to tell Beleth that they just want to see their child again, they pass out.

Anyway we cut back to CC. Sadly they seem to have escaped Bugsy's rule thanks to their "forcesight" to do a bunch of redacted things. They say that the paranoia on Neon had incubated and turned into Socketpuppet because of Beleth. Or Bugsy. Fine, whatever.

i'm the good guy

It does say that CC tried to protect Lily/Neon/Chip from getting their identities eaten, which doesn't really match what we were shown in that VN at all. CC then says she has to deliver a mask to its recipient because they've solved an instance of Schoolyard Disease by predicting what hurt to do in advance! Oh man, remember that?? I actually had to go back and reread it because it was already barely explained to begin with. I think solving an instance of Schoolyard Disease has now told them who they need to deliver the mask to.

Call-Clout remembers that this is where Median isn't saved, because Beleth is busy arguing with Sinpony over there. Beating a dead horse, am I right! Anyway Andre said a long time ago that without Median the plague spreads out of control and everyone dies. Oops! Srinivasa says they hate this world as much as they love it, and that they don't even feel real anymore, just a thing being manipulated by their mask. Stardrop warned you about this.

Call-Clout wants to take off the mask and just exist, but it'll look like the Unmasked Sun (Glip) and no one will help them then. So unfair. :( CC says the shift is inevitable and that they've lost this round and three identities. CC has a big hole in their chest and Socketpuppet shows up and eyes it. CC bleeding out summons an ENCORE (but wasn't Encore already here...?)

Encore shows up and says they can take the hole away from CC's chest, although CC is too weak to say anything with Socketpuppet nearby. It has a thorny ring looped into it like a keyring.

i guess you can call for multiple encores

CC says they're not good and are tired of playing the villain. Encore says they'll do it instead and they'll give them what they deserve, a fair trial. CC laughs at the idea, asking Encore where they were when they got blamed for the plague and exiled back in the Masked Sun VN. Socketpuppet lols in the background and again sizes up the hole in CC's chest.

CC calls them an idiot, resonating with "the entire cycle Socketpuppet had completed", and the hole in their chest congeals and becomes a Circlet of the Sun. Title drop! After all this time what is it?? What's the circlet of the sun??? What is it???

It's just the receipts of what Sila did.

the secret of this callout is... that it's a callout

Anyway CC rambles on disjointedly about exaggerating feelings and some talk of suicide and Sila assaulting her brother or mom or something, I can't keep track of this since it's not explained and I don't care. This is already so long and we're so close to the end...! CC goes on to describe malice and I thought maybe Glip was describing themselves but I think it's supposed to be directed at Sila. Not sure how I could've mixed that up!

got a face made of taffy

There's also a "diagram" that looks a lot like a uterus.

and some fallopian tubes i suppose

Anyway out of nowhere, Ms. Warmheart appears again. CC asks her to help them by yelling at CC as if she's yelling at Socketpuppet. Warmheart is peeved and says that CC already has a "little doll" in back to play with, and says that this is why CC got into this mess in the first place, their little experiments. Anyway CC and Warmheart and Socketpuppet argue and it's boring and doesn't make a lot of sense. Malice gets brought up again. Warmheart does say that CC is some kind of abomination that holds multiple souls and identities within themselves though.

She also mentions razing the land again! I remember that getting mentioned before. It's not explained any more here than it was back then.

burn it all to the ground

CC pulls out the mask they were supposed to deliver, saying it's time to eat it. Socketpuppet demands it but CC gives it to Warmheart instead, although she seems pretty hesitant about the whole thing. Encore meanwhile makes a big circlet portal and goes through it, figuring everyone else can handle it on their own. They wonder what they'll do when this frequency is completely drained of magic. They shrug and say it's just the natural consequence of trying to solve a problem by lying to yourself.

Mr. 5 meanwhile is covered with worthworms while everyone else is doing other things. What'll he do now, the narration wonders? Die, hopefully. Encore keeps going down a hole and Glip brings up being cancelled again out of nowhere.

this red circle is about to charge

Encore, looking sillier and sillier as they go, yells at Sila again. I thought at first they were yelling at themselves sarcastically but now I think it's genuine yelling at Sila? It's weird how the same accusations seem to fit between the two of them. Probably a coincidence.

/srs or /j? /srs or /j?????

There's more yelling at Sila, along with accusations of trying to kill herself to make Glip feel bad. It goes on and on for a while and then Glip's like "let me make it a violent cartoon, you like those!" and Bugsy shows up again. Bugsy likes punching things but sometimes feels bad about it and doesn't know why. What could it mean? At one point Bugsy holds up a list of all the people Glip's ever hurt and says they'll hold Glip accountable for it if Glip hurts them like they've ever hurt anyone ever. Just in case it's too subtle, Glip's name is scribbled out.

Bugsy wearing a fetching bra

There's more yelling at Sila. Glip/Encore says that when Bugsy acts like their bad feelings are reality, it erases theirs. They then say that that's fine, let's talk more about Bugsy's feelings. Let's make sure the rest of the story is agreeing with Bugsy! Let's see what happens, Glip says.

We go back to Clear Watching, WHERE ANGELS GO TO DIE. There are two new inmates in the cell of the prison (the channel on the discord, remember), Lily and Neon. No one ever escapes Clear Watching, where angels are held against their will for as long as the judge deems appropriate.

Glip appears and mocks them for being stupid enough to have their identities stolen/raped, especially by Bugsy of all people. Lily and Neon look on and while we saw Glip in a disguise, they see Encore as Encore. They say they've seen this creature in their dreams, overlooking every instance of Schoolyard Disease. Let's do it all again, let's see the tragedy from the top! Encore says. That does fit with what we know about Schoolyard Disease, to be fair.

The narration scolds Lily for not being a good mom, saying that Jupet is off hurting people all the time, with no idea how their mere presence brings plagues into existence. Jupet's getting hurt because they were never told that hurting others was bad, since Lily herself is good at hurting others. Lily feels bad and decides to swear off violence.

Since Lily can't die, there were never any consequences for killing others, so she just got used to it. Lily is upset, telling herself that killing shouldn't be normal, but it's become normal to her. Lily can't tell Jupet that what they're doing is wrong because she can't connect with Jupet's feelings without infecting them with an unnatural bloodlust, and leaves the feelings that Jupet picks up on anyway unexplained. While this is going on Lily is turning into a worm for some reason.

a furry slinky

Lily tries to understand what's happening to her as a constellation (Stardrops rule about reading stars?) appears on her. She must have stolen someone else's identity, she wonders, because why else would someone be stealing hers? It must be her fault and she deserves this, she reasons. She becomes a full furry slinky called Salivent, the cyclic solvent, swearing that she'll solve this problem if it's the last thing she does. Don't know why the saliva theme with her.

Some scribbles yell about victim blaming. I have no idea who they're supposed to be. Glip I assume.

odd equivalence i think

On closer inspection I THINK it's supposed to be Lily talking about being raped and Encore talking over her, but again I'm not sure. Encore goes on with more victim blaming and then says this is boring. Lily screams how this can be boring, and Encore says she's seen this hundreds of times. Lily swears off violence and then kills Neon again. Lily insists that she's changed and isn't like that anymore, and Encore says oh, like all those other times you said you wouldn't kill her? And Lily stays quiet.

Lilyworm writhes in her cell about how no one believes she's changed even though she says she has and how unfair that is. It's disgusting that Lilyworm thinks its intentions matter, someone says, no one cares. The "acid" escapes Lilyworm's throat and she says "why don't you like me" which isn't what she meant to say, and it gets rewritten to "why don't you believe me".

Neon has now merged with Obverse for whatever reason, asking why Lily would think she doesn't like them. Maybe it's because she doesn't like her. I'm not making a joke, that's what it says. It's implied by font though that it might be Obverse saying it and not her.

simple enough

Lilyworm screams "why won't you believe me" while Obverseneon says she does... believe she likes hurting her! Oh! Got you good!! It actually might be Obverse saying that though. They go on to say that they believe they don't like Lily, while what I think is Neon says that she does believe her. There's a bunch of rambling about Obverseneon believing Lily hates her and such and she's scared.

Obverseneon, with the subtitle Obnoxiously Oblivious, gets to a chalkboard to explain how she's wrong. There are more faux mathematics as we AGAIN go to the same theme, where Obverseneon thinks that she must not have been expressing her love for Lily correctly if Lily had to ask in the first place, so the blame is on her. She reasons that Lily is asking because she hasn't actually changed, otherwise she wouldn't ask. Whatever.

Obverseneon laughs about how funny this all is and how they could ever expect Lilyworm to change. "We're just feelings machines" she says, "none of this is real and never has been". Lilyworm also has a stupid face, kind of looks like a playground kiddy ride.

or an indie horror game villain

[brcakablc-mind]

Not to like kinkshame folks or anythin' but I feel kind of like you should keep your kinks to yourself in a public stream. Like I really truly do not want to hear about how you want to break your boyfriend.

The asshole in me wants to just start making shit up just to piss him off but what if it doesn't work and it just encourages him. Just be like oh yeah I ate someone's shit today. Yummy. So wet over it. I don't fuckin' know. Anything to get this guy to shut up in a public stream.

[kyliafanfiction]

Can I ask what the point of your vicious, passive-aggressive "vague blogging" is? You can tell by the fact that literally no one ever likes your posts that everyone else is disgusted by it. It's insulting, condescending, and makes everyone who sees your posts uncomfortable. Consider stopping it. Or just post "privately" so no one else has to read your juvenile, middle school level attacks on other posters.

....can I ask why you care?

Secondly, I have to ask why you felt the need to put vagueblogging into scar quotes like that. It's a pretty established term on social media at this point.

Vagueblogging is a common thing, it's a form of venting/ranting. If getting likes was actually relevant (and I do get periodic likes on some of my posts, though generally not my venting posts). If I cared about the fact that I didn't get many likes on said posts, I'd have stopped a long time ago. And clearly it isn't everyone because I have 256 followers, and while some may be bots, I do try to cull bots who follow me pretty quickly. Which means presumably ~200 people don't find my posts that uncomfortable. (That, or they get off on being uncomfortable, and who am I to kinkshame?)

I do have to ask: What, if anything, on this blog, has ever convinced you I give two solitary shits if people like me or what I post? That popularity has ever concerned me as a general principle or target to am for?

Calling my vagueblogs insulting and condescending isn't even an attack, that's just a description of what many of them are. The whole point is that I'm annoyed by something, but I don't have the time, energy or inclination to take it up with someone directly. (Hence why I rarely name names, hence the whole point of a vague/nonspecific blog) Often because, while it annoys me, it doesn't bug me that much. (I am very easy to annoy, much harder to upset). If I took my annoyance out on the cause every time, I'd be at it 36-hours a day, nine days a week.

So to save my sanity, and to not make my easy-annoyance everyone else's problem, on my own, personal blog, I make vagueblogging and nonspecificblogging, etc type posts. Where I (almost) never name names and try to avoid spilling into the tags of the relevant ship/character/fandom/etc, so I don't go clowning in someone else's house. The point is to get the thought out of my head, and move on with my day. Which, frankly, usually works. (sometimes, it doesn't, and the thought lives in my head rent-free all day).

The thing about your message, anon, is that this doesn't really speak to your maturity, regardless of your beliefs that my comments are 'juvenile' and 'middle school level'. if my comments make you so uncomfortable, you should stop following me. One of the hallmarks of maturity is knowing that you aren't comfortable and setting boundaries - or in this case, leaving. My blog is my space, and while you can reblog me over specific points, or request that I tag triggers, or the like, and I can respond as appropriate from there, blanket requests that I stop are not setting boundaries for yourself, but trying to control and corral my behavior. Such requests must be submitted, as outlined under the current version of the Rules of the Crazy Train™ (v2.02)

all requests for @kyliafanfiction to shut up (or variations thereof) must be properly stamped and sealed by the ‘I Don’t Care What You Think™” Department, and the “It’s My Blog I’ll Say What I Want™” Desk. Then you must present your request, in triplicate, to the “Do You Really Think This Will Work?™” Office, which is located in the seventh basement, behind the stairs and through the trapdoor that’s guarded by a rabid tiger. Once it is received, it will be handed over to our specially trained team of infinite monkeys to copy out fifteen more times, buried in a snow bank for six years, and then dug out and finally, a formal advisory opinion will be issued by our “Director of No™­”.

So as you can see, your request that I stop simply can't be accepted as presented.

If I make you or whoever else you speak for all that uncomfortable, please, please leave. Unfollow me, block me, blacklist my username. I highly encourage you to do so. I certainly can't be held responsible for you choosing to come into my house, as it were, and looking at my content when you are under no obligation or requirement to do so.

THAT SAID, if you if decide to remain here, I would love to hear specifics about what vagueblogging-type posts I made that pissed you off so much you decided to don sunglasses, turn yourself into a little grey ball and send me this message, because then I can make sure to make more of those posts.

The way I see it, either it drives you away and you leave/block me/etc (I win) or you send me more hate (I win), or you annoy me enough that I block you (I win).

I see no downsides for me here.

So please, anon, enlighten me. I am fascinated by your choice to send this message, and it has genuinely made my day brighter.

Send Me Your Hate

Oh, and 4/10. I'm in a good mood, so I'll grade your amateurish pseudo-concern trolling better than the rehashed, recycled and tired arguments you're using really deserves.

[aspiratinganxiety]

Smart Advertising

Hey, guys! I know it has been an age since I updated or posted any fic. I uh... I’ve been going through a lot. 

Many of you, I’m sure, are now familiar with Omegaverse and A/B/O Dynamics. I have a deep and abiding love for this particular brand of trash, and I’ve recognized that there is a lack of it in the DC fandom. SO! Surprise, surprise! I’m coming back with Part I for a Jason A/B/O fic. 

Let me know if you want to see more of this story, and I hope you’re all doing well in this godforsaken hellscape of a year <3 

Tag List: @nxxttime , @possiblyelven , @thepuckishrogue , @jinkies-its-a-writer, @queeniepearls, @sesquipedalian-aficionado, @reinathequeenofdreems, and @dcuniverse-fanatic (If you want to be tagged, let me know! For more fics, check out my masterlist.)

Making time for a meal was often too much work for Jason. He ate on the go, eight out of ten times. The rare occasions he sat still to consume food usually involved an invitation from Alfred, like today’s debacle of a lunch. Steph was fighting with Bruce (shocker), Barbara had the flu, and Cass was diligently working one doozy of case. Her brief email rundown was more than considerate, given that she was using a satellite connection on the ass-crack of the planet in some Godforsaken jungle.

Trying to find the time to arrange a date? Ridiculous.

           “C’mon, Jay,” Dick taps his shoulder with his knuckles. “I think you’d really like her. And her brother’s in the life, so it’s not like you have to deal with the ‘secret identity’ stuff.”

           Now that was a plus, just not enough of one to lure Jason out of his malcontent. “Who’s ‘er brother?” he asks around a mouthful of sandwich, hoping to change the subject.

           “Oh, a meta-guy I worked with in Spiral.”

           The deliberate nonchalance of the eldest Robin makes Jason bristle. “Yeah,” he reiterates, tucking the massive bite into his cheek to speak more clearly. “And his name was?”

           “Not the important part,” Dick dodges again. “The important parts are that she’s an omega living in Gotham who does charity work for a living. She is also very cute! I have a picture.” At this point, he sets down the family sized bag of plain Lays (abominable) and fishes his phone out of his back pocket.

           Tim, thank Christ, decides to weigh in on the matter. “I feel like who her brother is happens to be important, considering that you specified he knows who Jason is, and by proxy the rest of us…”

           “I didn’t say that!”

“You said I wouldn’t have to keep my identity a secret, because he’s in the life. That wouldn’t be relevant unless he knew me,” Jason motions to his chest vigorously, some stray shreds of lettuce escaping his sandwich.

“That’s not what I said” Dick insists.

“It’s what you implied with what you said.” Tim points at Dick with a cheese puff, pinky aloft, then pops the snack into his mouth to state another observation. “Also, regardless of whether or not he knows Jason, he knows who you are. That means he already knows who we are, and I’d really like to have his name, Dick.”  

“Tim, shut up. This isn’t about you.”

“Let’s watch our tone, boys,” Alfred says, breezing into the kitchen with a faintly disappointed air to have found them, not only arguing, but hunched vulture-like around the kitchen island decimating what would have been decent leftovers. “Master Dick, we all know how Jason feels about match-making: much the way Master Bruce feels about it.”

Outwardly admonished, Dick says something to schmooze Alfred while he slides his phone over to Jason. Never one to deny curiosity, Jason peers down to see the girl Dick’s pestering him about. She’s a round young woman in a dirty pink T-shirt holding up a mop-head of a puppy with a big, goofy smile on her face. Her hair is windswept, she’s clearly sunburned, her front teeth have a gap between them, and she’s possibly the most adorable human being he’s ever seen in his life.

Shaking his head, Jason says, “She’s not my type.”

Unrepentant and quick to ignore the wave of wry disapproval emanating from Alfred, Dick stops mid-excuse to say, “Oh, she is so your type. Don’t lie to me.”

“She looks twelve!” Jason recoils, scrunching his face and glancing back down at the sweet girl in the photo. “The hell’s wrong with you?”

“She does not,” Dick defends himself, using his back to block Tim’s snooping look toward the screen. He double checks the picture himself, and a few moments pass. “Okay,” he shoots Jason a resentful glance while swiping forward a few times. “She looks a little young in that particular picture, but she’s in her twenties. Here! Look at this one.”

Tim to the rescue again! “Uh, I thought you said you had a picture, Dick. As in one.”

Dick doesn’t bother to dignify that with more than a muttered, “Puh-lease.” Like they weren’t all aware that folders full of images on anyone were only a few clicks away. Tim, especially.

Jason tunes out of the bickering that begins between them as Dick continues to exclude Tim, physically using his body as a barrier and failing to hold the phone steady for Jason’s eyes. She’s in a bikini top seated in a cheap plastic kiddy pool, more tanned and freckled with her hair restrained somewhat successfully in a braid that sits over her shoulder. Three massive dogs crowd around her for attention, but her eyes, amber from the angle of the sun, are staring straight at the camera. This smile is shyer; lips hiding her teeth, shoulders bent forward to bring her chest in and mask the soft rolls on her stomach brought out by her position sitting upright. She does look to be markedly older in this particular photo.

“How many damn dogs does she have?” Jason returns to his sandwich, averting his eyes and willing his voice to be dismissive.

“She works at the new shelter in East End, bruh. These aren’t her dogs.”

Damian ghosted into the kitchen at some point and posted himself behind Jason. The older brother pretends that he’s not startled to hear the kid speak. “Really? I’ve been reading good things about their practice. No-kill, good rehoming rates. Working to coordinate with other shelters and founding a spay/neuter program...” he trails off, weaseling between the two oldest brothers to have a look at Dick’s phone. “Smart advertising too. A scantily clad omega female sitting a pool with freshly groomed dogs? Good call. I bet those three have already been adopted.”

“Scantily clad?” Tim prods, doubly straining to maneuver around Dick.

Mercifully, however, this brings the picture show to an end. Dick huffs, glancing uncomfortably at Damian and tucking his phone away. Apparently, an actual twelve year old commenting on a woman’s state of dress is enough to upset his sensibilities.

Damian looks at Jason, eyes piercing and the same green as his own. He digs a hand into Dick’s bag of potato chips and says, “You should date her. She was attractive enough, and I’m sure she’s a lovely person.”

The child is unblinking as he withdraws a handful of chips and begins to eat them while starting Jason down. He half expects the little fucker to wave his free hand and pull some Jedi mind trick gag, but remembers that Damian doesn’t do pop culture humor when Tim’s in the room.

Jason drops his sandwich on the naked stone counter as though he’s discovered mold. “Well, that’s it for me,” he says, edging toward the sunroom and the side door into the gardens. “I gotta’ go.”              

[deadangelo]

if a boy EVER... called me “good girl” or fucking... asked me to call him fucking “daddy”... ELECTRIC CHAIR. NO HESITATION.

[grellintransit]

shout out to everybody else who wants Sebastian to eat you because you're too weak to fulfill your contract

[subloganrights]

listen if you comment that you liked a fic aside from X, Y or Z or that you hates A, B, or C then 1. go fuck yourself for commenting something so mean on something someone worked really hard on and 2. go write that alternative fic yourself you fuck

[obey-me-headquarters]

OK. So. Knowing I'm a dom I don't really like sub reader. Not from any like, moral stand point, just from a "this is not For Me" stand point. Which is why I don't really engage with it a lot, but some times I do read a few sub!reader fics either because the writer is so good I'm willing to read something I usually don't like, or because they didn't tag their fic correctly and if I already start a fic why not finish it? Or because they did label it correctly and I'm just a dumbass that didn't notice the tag.

Anyway, so some times I read a sub!reader fic. And it's kind of weird, because I feel certain emotions that the author absolutely did not intend for the reader to feel, and I can't help but wonder who sub readers feel when they read dom!reader content.

OK so for example. Some times when I read sub!reader content I get a little... angry? Is that the right word? Like offended that someone would treat me that way. Like hello sir, I am not a slut! You shut ya mouth! I guess there's also there's preceded ignoring of consent. Because like, *I'm* a dom, and the pronouns used in x reader fics are you/yourself, so when a character is being all dommy, shoving the reader against walls and ripping there clothing off, I'm like "Wait no cut that out I wouldn't let someone do that to me".

Which I know isn't what the author is trying to convey! They're not trying to write something rapey, when you go into a sub!reader fic you're only in with the knowledge you're giving up that control for a dom to take. Listen I'm not trying to kinkshame lol, doms need subs to well, dom lol. I just wanted to explain my feelings to those who are curious what a dom might feel feel while reading a sub!reader fic.

So I gotta ask, because the curiosity has been eating me alive, how do subs feel when they read dom!reader fics? Like, I can see for a dom there's the preceded lack of consent, because dom/sub relationships are about control, and having that control taken away from you when you're a dom would feel Not Good.

Is it a "oh no, we're both bottoms" situation? Is it frustrating because you want them to get up and fuck you up? Is it a "wow, I would never ever do this to another person" sort of thing?

(Oh, any doms out there can add there two cents about sub!reader stuff too. I'm really interested about other folks opinions on this!)

[veliseraptor]

Wheel of Time for the meme!

eyo!!! just started (re)reading Crossroads of Twilight this morning baby

blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most): rand al'thor, possibly the original blorbo tbh. rand al'blorbo. blorbo al'thor? regardless

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped): do I have one of these in this fandom?? I'm not actually sure that I do. nobody is immediately coming to mind anyway.

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave): Semirhage is an underappreciated Forsaken. I suspect it is because she's too capable, because the best Forsaken for the most part are the extremely pathetic ones, but I think she deserves more credit. Also, "turned to the dark because she refused to be kinkshamed" is a bold move as far as villain motivation goes

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week): I don't actually talk about him a lot these days but I feel like my weird, weird intense affection for Mr. Jahar Narishma goes here. why do I like him so much? beats me but I do. maybe it's just cause he gets repeatedly described as pretty.

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave): Elan "the world is doomed and I'd like to put it on the elevator to that destination" Morin Tedronai. ♥️ Love a nihilist who is not so much "evil is inevitable so I'll join to be on the winning side" as "evil is inevitable so might as well bring about the ultimate collapse of the universe sooner rather than later."

Alternately, Tuon.

horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason): you might think Rand has "gone through enough" but you'd be wrong.

eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell): can I send the Malden arc to superhell instead of a character because I think I'd like to do that.

[downforthegas]

Tw: misogyny

Something I'd like to address: my account does not associate with misogyny. I am a feminist fighting for equality and women empowerment. I've noticed that two misogynistic accounts tried to interact with me. I won't say names but these two accounts have kinks (or beliefs I wasn't really sure) for being oppressed by men and believe that all women are specifically meant to serve men (obviously that's not something a lesbian wants to see). Worse is that one account rebloged a post saying women should shut up, stop fighting for equal rights, and let all men r⁴pe them. No I am not kidding.

I really don't want to kinkshame, but I absolutely HATE seeing stuff like that. I don't want those types of accounts following me, so if you're one of those accounts DO! NOT! INTERACT!

I realized the reason they probably interact is because I have a slur towards women in my username, so to make sure I don't give off the wrong idea, I'm changing it.

If any of those accounts see this, remember: I am a feminist. I will never stop fighting for equal rights, and most importantly, stay the FUCK away from me.