#The DM for my dnd group is better than me at Guilty Gear and I get like that a bit with him too

[solradguy]

I’m on lunch break so I’ve got time to tell you guys about my Kirby Smash 64 anime antagonist origin story:

So, my parents were abso-friggin-lutely adamant about sending me to this catholic school even though it was 30-40 minutes away from where I lived. I had to get up at like 5am every day so my mom could drive me all the way out there and have enough time to go to work. This meant that she’d have to drop me off like almost an hour before school actually started, but the school had before and after school daycare programs and it worked out. This was for 3rd and 4th grade. I was like 9 or something idk.

Anyway, the daycare in the musty basement of this ancient school building had toys for the kids. Someone’d donated two Nintendo 64s, which was bitchin because this was, like, 2000 and that was the cool new thing. There weren’t many games and some of them didn’t even work but they had Smash and two controllers. You could only use both controllers if someone wasn’t playing on the second console. 

There was this kid a few grades ahead of me, in 7th or maybe 8th. I can’t even remember his name now. He wasn’t a bad kid, but he mained Fox and he was a real dick about how good he was at Smash. I had to destroy him. His smug aura activated some horrible demon in my heart and I had to be better than him at all costs. I had a 64 at home but not Smash, so I could only play it at my friend’s house or at the daycare. Because I wasn’t very good at the game, I played Kirby since it was easy to recover with him and he had, what I thought, was a good kit. Sometimes I’d play Link or Samus, but Kirby was my boy. 

I was RELENTLESS about playing against this older kid. He didn’t always go to to the daycare and on days he wasn’t there I’d play the story mode in Smash and practice. I had to beat him. I had to make him suffer for all the times he gloated when he beat me. He beat me a lot. I don’t think I got my first win against him the entire first school year we played together, but by 4th grade I’d gotten a copy of Smash at home and I grinded the hell out of it over the summer with my friends. 

Sometime partway through 4th grade I beat him. And then I kept beating him. I beat him so much he stopped rubbing it in when he won. His spirit was being crushed. This little 4th grader was kicking Fox’s teeth in with the chewed bubblegum character. I was hungry for blood though. I kept beating him, until I beat him as often as he used to beat me. Eventually he stopped playing Smash and would say that he’d “rather play Mario Kart or Star Fox instead.”

Victory was never sweeter. 

I didn’t know it then, but 4th grade was the last grade I would go to that school before switching to a public school that was closer to home. I never saw him again and he probably doesn’t remember me either. But I remember him and the awful fire he lit in my heart those two years