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jswdmb1 · 5 years

Text

Video Killed The Radio Star

“We hear the playback

and it seems so long ago

And you remember

the jingles used to go”

- The Buggles

My mom asked me to help her set up an Apple TV a while back, and it made me realize how far we have come as far as entertainment options go. I remember the day my dad came home and announced he saw that they were installing cable TV lines in the neighborhood. He was about as excited as I have ever seen him. It meant we increased our channel roster from about five to over thirty! There was a network that played sports 24 hours a day! We could watch movies at home uncut and uninterrupted. I wanted my MTV and now I got it! It may seem quaint to someone who wasn’t there at the time, but it was an incredibly cool and mind-blowing experience when you consider how our viewing experience exponentially changed with the installation of that little black cable.

As I was setting up the Apple TV, and all of the incredible options that come with it, I did not feel the same as that day in 1983 when I could now watch Nickelodeon and Australian rules football to my heart’s content. Sure, the explosion of viewing options within cable and streaming services are just awesome, but sometimes it seems too much. The immediate gratification of it all is disappointing as well. The concept of binge watching seems to take away from the anticipation we used to have from the episode we waited all week for (or all summer for a cliffhanger). That anticipation would start with the show’s theme song, which I feel is a real lost art. Just the act of hearing that familiar tune along with credits and scenes of the stars of the show was almost as exciting as the show itself. It may make me seem old and out-of-touch, but I really miss those days when we lived without DVRs and on demand viewing and got real theme songs to kick off your entertainment viewing experience.

But instead of rueing over days long lost, let’s celebrate some of those old shows (that ironically are all over Hulu and Netflix) that were not only great programs, but had the type of theme songs that really made you feel good when they came on. It meant something that you waited for all week was about to arrive, and for an hour or two you could lose yourself in a world away from your own. I now present to you my ten favorite tv theme songs and their shows, in no particular order:

1) All in the Family - In fall of 1973, CBS put forth what is considered the finest lineup on one night in television history. On Saturday nights, people stayed home for three straight hours of unparalleled entertainment. This was the start of it all at 7:00 (all times I give you are Central). There was no better lead off than Edith and Archie sitting at the piano singing “Those Were the Days”. How cool is it to have your lead actors sing the theme song live. All In the Family was so great it had a separate ending theme. You can read plenty elsewhere about the groundbreaking episodes that went on in between, but the theme music from this series gets us off and running.

2) Rockford Files - This show always opened with a unique montage of a client of Jim’s leaving a message on his answering machine. What followed was what I consider the best music composition on the list. Written by Mike Post, it is a funky, hard driving and timeless theme just like the Pontiac Firebird he drove. I like this song so much it is often in my normal rotation on many of my daily playlists. The program was great, for sure my favorite detective show of all time, but I would tune in just for this song.

3) Hill Street Blues - This is another Mike Poat theme, but couldn’t be more different than Rockford’s theme. Jazzy rather than funky and smooth versus hard driving, the piano of the song seemed to sum up everything this show was about. I recently caught up with some episodes on Hulu recently and forgot how ahead of its time this show was. Before Hill Street Blues, police dramas tended to tie things up neatly before the hour ended. This show, like life, didn’t always work out so well. The sadness of the lives in the people in the show is tinged throughout the theme. But, you also hear some hope in the final chords, and I think that what the show was all about. It told us that life could be a grind and full of despair, but there are also a lot of good people trying their best to ease suffering and make this world a better place. That’s a lot to pack into one theme song, but this one hits all the right notes.

4) M*A*S*H - This was in the 7:30 slot on the CBS Saturday lineup and was put there to boost its ratings in its second season. As hard as it is to believe in hindsight, the show struggled to find its audience in its first year. For many folks, the opening theme was their first introduction to this unique medical/war comedy/drama. Like the show, the theme (titled “Suicide is Painless”) was taken from the 1970 movie of the same name. The TV version dropped the lyrics and became one of the most instantly recognizable themes ever. The show that followed is very good too. I must confess that I am a bit of a M*A*S*H aficionado and the second season was one of their best (I’m partial to the McLean Stevenson/Wayne Rogers episodes). If you haven’t watched the show in a while, give a couple of episodes a spin (now on Hulu). I’ll bet dollars to donuts you are whistling the theme the rest of the day.

5) WKRP In Cincinnati - A terribly underrated show with an equally underrated theme, the quirky gang at WKRP were always good for some laughs and DJs spinning great records. While the theme song is fantastic (“...baby just think of me once in a while” is such a great line), the real soundtrack of the show was the late 70s/early 80s rock and roll in the background of each episode. Unfortunately, due to licensing issues, you don’t get those songs in the reruns, but the crazy storylines and big laughs that come with them still make this series worth your time. As a side note, the lyrics in the theme at the end are pure jibberish. The writer of the song used nonsense words as placeholders but the producers kept them in as a bit of an inside joke about how hard rock lyrics are to understand. I think that perfectly sums up what WKRP is all about.

6) Mary Tyler Moore Show - Who can turn the world on with a smile? Mary no doubt did it every Saturday night at 8:00. I have vague memories of this show the first time it came around as first run episodes, but found it later in reruns and discovered what a true gem it is. The characters were quirky and unique without being oversimplified and the acting of the supporting cast was brilliant. Any show with Ed Asner, Ted Knight and Betty White is going to end up being our gold. As for the theme song, I think it is the most hopeful and happy on the surface, but it always struck a sad note with me. There always seemed to be a back story with Mary in the show that we weren’t always getting that hinted of difficult times before she got to Minneapolis. The song echos that and her throwing the hat up at the end seems to tell us that no matter how rough things were, or might end up, she’ll keep that smile on her face. Not a bad lesson for all of us to follow.

7) Three’s Company - In the interest of full disclosure, I did not watch this show when it first aired. It was banned from my house by my mother because it was “stupid”. Once I left the house for college, I wanted to start trying new things and testing my independence in this world, so the first thing I did was devote every weeknight from 10:00 to 11:00 to the Three’s Company reruns on Channel 32. What I saw was certainly a bit stupid but far from a waste of time. Arguably, the show included some of the finest physical comedy of it’s day and was a great showcase for actors like John Ritter, Norman Fell (Mr. Roper) and Don Knotts. Admittedly, the premise and some of the themes of the show have not aged well, but I never saw anything but an intent to have fun and provide a few laughs. That was conveyed in the theme song which was as light and airy as the breeze coming off the Pacific while standing on the pier in Santa Monica. For me, just the sound of that song brings back a memory of living in the college dorms and starting off an independent life full of promise and possibilities. Each episode of this show felt the same even if each could have been solved in the first two minutes with a simple question or statement like “No, Mr. Furley, Jack is getting a Mexican pot to cook in, not the kind you smoke”. I guess though, that wouldn’t have been all that funny.

8) Barney Miller - This one is on here purely for the bass line. The notes are unmistakeable and leads into a full jazz combo with killer lead guitar. The funk you hear in the theme follows along with the show. The detectives at the precinct seemed to take what initially seemed to be mundane aspects of police work and turn every epsiode into a funky life lesson. I read somewhere that real cops think this is the police show more true to life than any other they have seen. I’m guessing it was because they drew up characters so real to the point where you would think of them as people first and not some exaggerated character as most police are drawn up on TV. The whole thing just worked and really was quite funny. The episodes hold up very well in reruns as well, so if you have never given it a try, I think you’ll find that it is as good as any other cop show you have seen recently.

9) Bob Newhart Show - Anchoring the CBS Saturday night 8:30 slot is another jazzy instrumental that is a great theme, but in this case the show behind it was the real gem. Just like Barney Miller, The Bob Newhart Show took the fairly mundane aspects of life - whether it be at the office or at home - and mined them for laugh after laugh. For those who are finds of Mr. Newhart (Loyola, Class of ‘52), this is no surprise. Bob could literally turn a phone call into absolute hilarity. His choice of profession on the show was perfect as well - for those who don’t know he played a psychologist. As someone who has spent a lot of time in the offices of mental health professionals, I can tell you first hand that the only portrayal that I have seen that is true-to-life is the one on this show. The group therapy sessions are always the real gems and this show nails exactly what they are like. I can’t it explain it much further, just go get a copy of the first season of this and watch it and you’ll know what I’m talking about. Also, this show gets credit for one of the best wacky neighbors - Howard the pilot played by the incomparable Bill Daley. Of all of the shows on this list, this is the one that I would recommend you check out before all others.

10) The Love Boat - The show was pretty lame though I can be talked into watching anything that could have Sonny Bono, Vincent Price, and Chart as guest stars on the same night. The theme, however, was a winner. Sure it was cheesy, but it fit the series perfectly and always gave me the impression that I would know I made it in life if I could take a cruise on a boat like the Pacific Princess (I haven’t so I guess that I’m still waiting to make it). Another reason that I love this show is that I have fond memories watching it with my Grandma when we would occasionally stay over at her house on Saturday nights. Her smart comments about all of the washed up actors and how bad they looked or untalented they were was the real entertainment of the evening. Plus, just the fact that she let us stay up late to watch it was a real treat in it of itself. She would make us popcorn and let us have a soda and we could just live it up. It’s funny how the most simple things in life end up being the most memorable. I’d give anything right now for an hour again with her and that show. Gosh, what fun.

Honorable mentions include the themes from Hawaii 5-0, The Golden Girls, Cheers, Sanford & Son, The Greatest America Hero, Good Times, The Odd Couple, Welcome Back Kotter, and Miami Vice

Now, I know that I’m being a real old-timer here by bringing out these ancient shows, but I will challenge you to a different binge-watching experience before passing judgment on my list. Just You Tube the ten opening theme songs/credits that I list here and watch them in order. You don’t even have to watch whole episodes of these shows (though if you the time you should). I guarantee that you will get a feel for what it was like when these shows were first on the tube. Or, if that’s too much work, I made you a playlist with a few other favorites:

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2J8rLlC3FIAvaCLmQg95vT?si=fpgJ8wYaSH-V0M0gP12rvA

I am now at the ending point of this post. It’s always hard for me to come up with a good finish to one of these. I now realize that I need a good theme song. I guess that is going to be hard to convey in written form and also because I don’t have one, but hum something catchy in your head and play it across images of the great times you just had reading this blog.

Until next time....

Jim

P.S. - The last hour of “The Greatest Night in Television” on CBS was occupied by the Carol Burnett Show. A fantastic program, but not my favorite theme, so it did not make the list. Still worth checking out if you find it on somewhere if only to watch the cast crack up at Tim Conway’s antics.

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