#UWAAUAAA i need to think about how cool itll be in a week... i need to remember this...
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i neeed to
#for him (noiz dmmd) and for me (cant have 17 y/o beat me) and for them (strangers that will know im sosoo cool)#pfpfpfpfffff its so harddd and im not even in tomorrow yett#whateber itll be chill. i will be soo brave and normal about it#ik its very much just paranoia talking rn bc theres no reassurence available yet. and i just have to push through.#but then i think about if i actually want this (i do) and about how ill look to others (cool asf)#and how my job will treat me (i already have two facial piercings) and how bruised theyll be (probably not very. and only for a few days.?#UWAAUAAA i need to think about how cool itll be in a week... i need to remember this...#i need to remember that 17!! Y/O ME CAN NOT FUCKING BEAT ME ON THIS. god that would be emberassinggggg#sillyposting#i need to do this despite the scary in the moment and even more so despite what people will think of me.#think about how cool ill look.... think about how much closer to my ideal human form (noiz dmmd) i will be... yes....#i will be so cool and chill and aweesome... yes....#B) <- me tomorrow. at last.#if the paranoia isnt right and verything doesnt go wrong etcetc. yk.
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