#a comedy of non-mathematical errors

[lya-dustin]

A Comedy of Non-mathematical Errors

Chapter 2

Michael is not allowed to keep most of his clothing after mummy dearest looked over his current wardrobe.

She had looked faint when he explained the practicality of his favorite cargo pants that turned into cargo shorts thanks to the nifty zippers. Even better he’d gotten them on sale.

“We will donate all your old clothes to charity.” The blonde woman had said only letting him keep his underwear and a handful of things that passed her inspection.

He was not at all surprised to know by charity Elspeth meant the garbage can.

But she did like how clean and organized he was and told Felix that was the right way to keep one’s room.

“Should we do something about his hair, mum?” Venetia asks, looking at him as if he were her personal Ken doll. She’d picked out some of his clothes, made him get a suit that matched a dress she was going to wear ---and made him and Felix buy two matching outfits.

Now she wants to cut his hair.

“What’s wrong with my hair?” he dares to ask. If you ask him its pretty great, especially because he did it himself.

“Nothing, sweetheart.” His mother said and yet he is dragged to a high-end barber shop despite his protests. “Felix, make sure your brother gets a nice haircut that doesn’t look like a blind man with blunted shears did it.”

Ouch.

“You’ll be fine with just a trim, Mikey.” Felix says with a smile that makes Michael wince at the nickname as harmless as it is. But the trip to the barber is a relief compared to the endless shopping of yesterday with Elspeth and Venetia.

Michael is given a luxury spa treatment along with Felix who has the same preferences as him despite the difference in socioeconomic statuses.

“I invited Ollie home for the summer, felt so bad for not telling him about us being brothers and his dad dying, I told him he could come visit us.” Felix attempts to be friends were all cut short by Michael who wasn’t sure how to even go from there.

Apparently, Sir James enjoyed Countdown, Venetia wanted to pursue fashion, Elspeth had a DPhil in Art History and spent her life collecting art while Felix attempts to write a novel because if someone is going to write the Cattons in this generation it must be one of them.

Despite their vapid ways, Michael supposed not everyone who acts like an airhead may actually be an airhead. A tough thing to incorporate into your world view when you’ve spent the school year seeing Felix and Farleigh with the same copy of Harry Potter pretending to read. Once they’d even held the book upside down.

“Your mum told me about it, yeah. Does he know what happened?” Michael hopes his ditzy twin brother completely forgot.

“Fuck. I can’t remember.” Maybe Felix was a real ditz, the way they talked about the Catton heir being a genius, his parents must’ve feared leaving everything in his hands. But his stupidity makes this all easier.

“After he tossed me off to hang out with you at the pub, I told him we weren’t friends anymore.” Because he is an opportunistic bootlicking cunt.

The more he learned about Oliver Quick the more he sounded like a fucking psychopath. What’s next dressing up as his mum? Killing any girl Felix talks to?

“Oh, he’d said you had already left. I only talked to him so he could invite you to join us. I liked your shirt, have one like it, just can’t find it in the mess.” Felix sits by his open window to smoke ---Michael detests the smell--- and gave a small laugh as he mentions his pigsty of a room.

“Actually, he pretended not to see me when I came back,” Michael isn’t even surprised Poor Dear Ollie had lied about that too. “Maybe it’s better if he doesn’t know I’m here.”

Michael’s terrible at talking or persuasion, and yet, it doesn’t take much to convince Felix to make his presence here a surprise.

Saltburn is nice, a touch gaudy and weird, but other than that the place looks fine.

His room is across Felix’s with Venetia next door and a guest room for a friend on the other side of the luxury bathroom that was bigger than his old bedroom.

“Mum has a fear of ugly things, I wouldn’t wear these if I were you.” Venetia plucks his glasses off his face and Michael swats at her blindly trying to get them back. He only succeeds accidentally grabbing her nose before giving up

“See how handsome you look? You look like Uncle Micah.” The bleached blonde girl shows him his own mirror to tell him so.

“Can’t fucking see, Venetia.” He points out and squints at his own reflection trying to see if she was being honest and not flattering him out of pity.

Plenty of people loved telling him he could look great if he tried. He’s pretty sure he looks like Shaggy from Scooby-Doo right now and tells his younger sister so.

“Mum’s fine with the glasses, its piercings she doesn’t like.” Felix easily takes the glasses out of Venetia’s hands and carefully puts them back on Michael’s face. “Voila.”

“What do you think, Mike?” they ask when he gets a good look at himself.

And sure, enough he looks like someone who could get any girl or invite he desired. Michael Gavey was gone; Michael Catton had taken his place.

Oliver is going to regret dropping him for Felix.

[julyzaa]

Thanks for the tag @alexagirlie

Rules: In a new post, post the names of all the files in your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them and then post a little snippet of it or tell them something about it! and then tag as many people as you have WIPs.

So i put my wips in abbreviations so imma just unabbreviate them for y'all

Larian fic

Arrow house

A Comedy of Non-mathematical Errors

National Anthem

Shock and Delight

All is Bliss 2 electric Boogaloo

Aemma Velaryon one shots

Incantatrice

Eva one shots

Tie your heart to mine

Peaky one shots

Potiphars wife

Tell me how you die

Cupid kills with arrows

Love's a state of mind

A maiden with Moonglow in her hair

Of gods and witches

No pressure tag: @valeskafics @zablife @peakyswritings @runnning-outof-time @call-sign-shark @rysko @cljordan-imperium @emilykaldwen @exitpursuedbyavulcan @the-common-cowgirl @thehedgehogat221b @toms-cherry-trees

[allenmendezsr]

Mathematical Quickies & Trickies

New Post has been published on https://autotraffixpro.app/allenmendezsr/mathematical-quickies-trickies/

Mathematical Quickies & Trickies

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Fear not math, fear God.

The Mathematical Quickies & Trickies E-Book Series NOW AVAILABLE for the FIRST TIME for non-iPad users!

Tired of constantly being fooled by tricky math questions? No longer do you need to, because help is now available.

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Singapore’s bestselling Mathematical Quickies & Trickies, which has sold over 90,000 copies locally, contains more than 300 non-routine problems to enhance students’ mathematical problem-solving skills. With many creative worked examples and questions, and with cartoons sprinkled throughout the book, Mathematical Quickies & Trickies would appeal primarily to these audiences:

* grades 5-7 students and teachers looking for some fertile trick and tricky questions;

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Contents 1. Mental Computation I 2. Mental Computation 2 3. Number Series 4. A Tricky Way with Fractions 5. Test Your Calculator Proficiency 6. Simplifying a Complex Fraction 7. Recurring Decimals 8. Is Zero an Even or Odd Integer? 9. Casting Out Nines 10. Be a Calculator Expert 11. Division by 9 12. Number Riddles 13. Ten Steps to be Math Smart 14. Shortcuts a la Trachtenberg 15. Geometrical Quickies 1 16. Geometrical Quickies 2 17. Geometrical Quickies 3 18. (Sugar + Coffee) + Milk = Sugar + (Coffee + Milk) 19. Applications of Number Laws 20. Law of One 21. Distributive Law 22. More Applications of Distributive Law 23. The Joy of Guesstimation 24. Are You a Fermi Disciple? 25. Bravo Singapore 26. Lightning Calculators 27. Geometrical Quickies 4 28. Some Calculator Quickies Answers & Solutions Bibliography & References

Type of e-book: Nonfiction, problem solving, recreational, Singapore math, trick questions Audiences: Suitable for Grades 4-7 (or Primary 4-7 levels) Cost of e-book: $9.99 File format: PDF (10.6 MB zipped file) Delivery: Via direct download from Order Confirmation e-mail Product Queries: kcyan.mathplus(Replace this parenthesis with the @ sign)gmail.com

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Sample chapter: Casting Out Nines c9_quckiest

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On Amazon.com, a printed copy of Mathematical Quickies & Trickies is priced at US$12.90.

This long-awaited sequel of Mathematical Quickies & Trickles comes with many creative worked examples and questions, with cartoons sprinkled throughout the book to keep in line with the same irreverent and fun spirit of the previous book.

A wallet-friendly Singapore math problem-solving book for $9.99 ONLY

In addition to 300+ trick and tricky questions, More Mathematical Quickies & Trickles comes with more than 25 five-minute enrichment mathematics items, aimed at enhancing the mathematical problem-solving skills of problem solvers.

You won’t only be exposed to different problem-solving techniques, commonly used in answering math contests and competitions questions, but also learn to appreciate elegant or intuitive solutions.

More Mathematical Quickies & Trickies would appeal primarily to these audiences:

* grades 6-8 students and teachers looking for some fertile trick and tricky questions;

* mathletes preparing for local and regional contests and competitions;

* problem solvers longing to be challenged by questions whose obvious solutions are never the correct ones for what offhand appears to be true is false.

To buy the e-book version of More Mathematical Quickies & Trickies, click HERE for $9.99 ONLY!

Contents 1. Creative GST 2. Are You Calculator-Smart? 3. What Is the Easy Way? 4. The Magic of Three Consecutive Numbers 5. Twitter Math @MathPlus 6. What Is 27 x 37, Really? 7. Humanizing 1, 2, 3 8. A Mathophobia Kit 9. WITs: 13 Ways to Attain Mathematical Excellence 10. Facebook Math: Numeracy vs. Literacy 11. Thou Shalt Not Divide By Zero 12. Math Jokes to Relieve Stress 13. Look-see Proofs 14. Some PhD Math Questions 15. Mathematical Prayers 16. The Largest Product 17. What’s Wrong?: A Comedy of Mathematical Errors 18. The Aha! Myth 19. Sam Loyd’s Toughies 20. The Tuesday Boy Problem 21. What Is 1 + 1, Really? 22. In Love with Cryptarithms 23. Mathematical Kiasuism 24. The Mathemagic of 142857 25. The Lighter Side of Singapore Math 26. K C Yan’s Laws & Lores 27 Flee and Free from the FREE Answers/Hints/Solutions Bibliography & References

Type of e-book: Nonfiction, problem solving, recreational, Singapore math, trick questions Audiences: Suitable for Grades 6-8 (or Primary 6 – Secondary 2 levels) Cost of e-book: $9.99 File format: PDF (16.4 MB zipped file) Delivery: Via direct download from Order Confirmation e-mail Product Queries: kcyan.mathplus(Replace this parenthesis with the @ sign)gmail.com

You can buy the e-book version of More Mathematical Quickies & Trickies from:

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Sample chapter: Mathematical Jokes ch12_more_quckiest

For information about the Author. Fan Page for More Mathematical Quickies & Trickies, click HERE.

On Amazon.com, a printed copy of More Mathematical Quickies & Trickies is priced at US$12.90.

Bored by drill-and-kill geometry questions in your school textbook? Do you always feel ill-equipped to tackle those tricky questions in geometry?

Geometrical Quickies & Trickies may be the right place to broaden and deepen your visualization skills in solving geometry trick and tricky questions, commonly set in mathematics contests and competitions.

A book on trick and tricky questions in geometry

Not only you’ll be equipped with the problem-solving strategies and heuristics in solving non-routine geometry questions, but you’ll also be enriched with no fewer than 20 items of recreational geometry to enhance your appreciation with many hours of aha! moments.

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Geometrical Quickies & Trickies is suitable for grades 6-9 problem solvers and mathletes, and for teachers and tutors who desire to challenge (or torture) their students mathematically. It contains over 200 non-routine geometry questions that may be used to separate the nerd of mathletes from the herd of drill-and-kill specialists.

Contents

What is a Circle?

Three Famous (or Notorious) Geometrical Problems

Non-Euclidean Geometry for Goondus

How Many Regions?

That Holy Little Geometry Book

Fun with Areas and Perimeters

Always a Parallelogram!

The Malfatti’s Problem

The Beauty of Pi

The Zero Option

The Golden Ratio by Paper Folding

The Ubiquity of Phi

Matchstick Mathematics

The Rolling Circle Question

Two Useful Circle Properties

Proving the Obvious

Sanguku—Japanese Temple Geometry

Applications of Pythagorean Theorem

Visualizing Infinity

Geometrical Idiosyncrasies Answers/Hints/Solutions Bibliography & References

Type of e-book: Nonfiction, problem solving, recreational math, Singapore math, trick questions, geometry, enrichment math Audiences: Suitable for Grades 6-8 (or Primary 6 – Secondary 2 levels) Cost of e-book: $9.99 File format: PDF (10.6 MB zipped file) Delivery: Via direct download from Order Confirmation e-mail Product Queries: kcyan.mathplus(Replace this parenthesis with the @ sign)gmail.com

You can buy the e-book version of Geometrical Quickies & Trickies from:

ClickBank (click HERE) for $9.99 ONLY!

Sample chapter: The Rolling Circle Unit 14

For information about the Author.

On Amazon.com, a printed copy of Geometrical Quickies & Trickies is priced at US$12.90.

More e-books are on the way—look out for them!

ClickBank is the retailer of products on this site. CLICKBANK® is a registered trademark of Click Sales, Inc., a Delaware corporation located at 917 S. Lusk Street, Suite 200, Boise Idaho, 83706, USA and used by permission. ClickBank’s role as retailer does not constitute an endorsement, approval or review of these products or any claim, statement or opinion used in promotion of these products.

[stephmolliex]

Getting started with playing your own music in iTunes on the Mac

If Apple won't chop iTunes up into separate apps, we will. AppleInsider takes each element of iTunes and shows you how to get the best out of it. First up: simply playing your own music collection. The typical and maybe general consensus today is that Apple's iTunes app for Macs is too complicated. That would be because it really, really is -- but it got that way through accretion. The original MP3 music player has steadily become where Apple expects you to manage your iOS backups, buy TV and movies, stream Apple Music and more. Subscribe to AppleInsider on YouTube Only, if you came in late, or if you're new to Macs as a result of an iPhone halo effect, you're faced with everything at once and it's a wall of options and features. If you're a long-time AppleInsider reader, you're probably an old hand at all this -- but you probably know somebody who isn't. Regardless, if you started with iTunes back when it first launched in 2001 and you've stayed with it, you've seen these new features being added. You've had time to understand how iTunes works and then to absorb each additional feature. We wouldn't be shocked if Apple eventually breaks up iTunes into separate apps. Frankly we'd prefer it at this point. But, the company could've done that at any point and so you'd assume Apple prefers centering everything on iTunes. However, Apple is soon to launch a video streaming service and has already demonstrated moving iOS apps to the desktop in macOS Mojave. So you can imagine a time in the near future when the TV app from iOS comes over to the Mac. If it does, that would presumably mean television and film leave iTunes. In the meantime, though, if Apple isn't going to break up iTunes, at least we can break it down. Imagine, if you will, that iTunes is solely for your music or solely for backing up iPhones, and so on. Find out how each element of iTunes is actually a hugely powerful and adaptable tool that makes sense. First up, music. Using iTunes purely as player for your music -- not even including online purchases from the iTunes Store. We're going back to how iTunes originally was, just with all the relevant features of today's iTunes version 12.8. Music Today iTunes is as much a retail store as it is something that stores your music. Originally, though, there wasn't a lot you could do without adding some songs and you did it through ripping CDs. Subscribe to AppleInsider on YouTube The only surprise is that you still can. If you've still got some shiny discs around the house, get them into iTunes. Or if you ripped them all many years ago but haven't thrown any away, rip them again. Macs are faster, storage space is cheaper and iTunes rips at a higher bitrate than before. These all combine to let you grab music off your CD and have it in excellent quality. These days your CD drive may be as hard to find as your discs but if you have one connected to your Mac and pop a shiny disc into it, this is what you get. Depending on the speed of your drive and how surprised your Mac is to see a disc in there, it could take a few seconds for iTunes to prompt you with this. When it does, though, just say yes. Notice, though, that the prompt is specific: it's asking if you want to import this particular CD. Not just whatever CD is in the drive but specifically this one by title. Then notice behind the prompt: it's already got the title of every track on the CD. This will seem as nothing to you if you've only ever used Apple Music but when CD ripping was the only thing you could do, it was a revelation. Rather than importing an album and then having to figure out which Untitled Track was "Blinded by the Light," iTunes could then and still does now get all of that information for you. However, don't trust it. The information comes from a database called Gracenote which is filled with details typed in by listeners. So maybe you don't have to type the track names in for this album but someone has. Hats off to them for taking the time. We just wish they'd taken an inch more care, though. It is common to find typing mistakes and other errors. If you spot one or if the album you're importing doesn't have any track details yet, you can type them in yourself. Then click on the cog wheel icon and choose Submit CD Track Names. You're giving back to the internet and you're doing it better than they did. Is it done yet? Importing a CD isn't lightning fast but it's not bad. Still, you do have long enough to wait that you start remembering it's possible to have songs at different bitrates or even formats. You have long enough to wonder whether you should've set it up to import as MP3 or whatever. By default, iTunes will be importing that CD in Apple's AAC format and at 256kbps. Unless you really know what you're doing with audio, leave it as that. And go look for some album artwork. Naturally, you're going to take the cover out of the CD jewel case and then scan it in. You're not going to just do a Google search and hope the images are free of copyright. Whatever way you want to get the album artwork, get the album artwork. It turns iTunes from a dull list into feeling like a true collection. Click on the album -- not the individual tracks, specifically the album -- and choose the Edit menu, then Get Info. You're editing one solitary album but it contains many tracks so iTunes will check you want to "edit information for multiple items." You do. You first see a Details tab with track name, artist and so on. You can add or amend these but for now click on Artwork. Drag your artwork into this panel and then wait a few moments while iTunes applies that image to the album and each track on it. Now listen Honestly, going back through doing this felt like a history documentary. Except as we struggled to remember what it was like ripping hundreds of CDs, we did find some in our collection that we hadn't done. Most were non-commercial releases and many weren't even music. We have 40 or more CDs of BBC Radio dramas that we recorded off air and now popped into iTunes. The process was the same, the sole difference is that nobody's ever entered these track details into any database. So we had to do a lot more typing but the result was a hundred hours or more of drama to listen to. It might, however, be a bit jarring to be listening to Bruce Springsteen one moment and then because we're on shuffle find ourselves deep in Act III, Scene II of "King Lear". One thing about shuffle. The iTunes app can play all of your music in a completely random order -- except it won't. No randomizer is really entirely random. It works by a sequence of math that ultimately will repeat itself, will be the same as the start. However, that mathematical and computing necessity has been added to. Reportedly, Apple got so many complaints about iTunes on iPods not being random that it changed the system. It wasn't to make it more random, it was to make it less. People apparently complained that if you got two songs by the same artist one after another then it couldn't be random. Of course it could. And in a truly random system then at some point you would get the same song by the same artist twice in succession. There's no telling some people, though, so now iTunes has a random shuffle that won't play you a song entirely randomly. Playlists This jump from drama to disco, from comedy to country, has happened to us. Sometimes it's been remarkably appropriate as we skip from "Atlantic City" into the demise of Lear. However, we can avoid this by choosing the album we want to play. We can choose the artist and listen to just their work. Or we can create playlists. There's not a lot of mystery to a regular playlist. Just choose File, New, Playlist, give it a name and start dragging songs into it. Or you could select some songs first and then choose File, New, Playlist from Selection. Or create a smart playlist. This is a simple list of songs or tracks but which you didn't pick. Instead, you told iTunes what sort of thing you want and it has found songs for you. In this example, we've said we want an hour of music, please, made up of songs that we've played more than 75 times. The play count on iTunes isn't accurate; depending on whether you listen to silence at the end of some tracks may make a difference, for instance. Yet a higher number suggests music we like so that's what we asked for here. You could go into gigantically greater detail. Or even impossibly greater detail. You can ask for a playlist made up of all the jazz music you own played either by Monk or Beiderbecke, which you haven't played since that hot night last 4th of July, and which is between 11 and 13 minutes long. You could throw in that the tracks must be ones you've rated as five stars. We have never though it sane to go through every track giving it a star rating but then we've gone through every album adding artwork. What do we know? Well, we know that Apple has rather hidden away the star ratings since the move to Apple Music. It's not likely they'll vanish completely but still, we wouldn't embark on a fifteen-thousand track star-rating expedition. Apple Music and Other Stories That's a case where iTunes has been changed by the addition of something else. Throughout the app, you'll find places where you get choices to move on from your own CD collection to, say, Apple Music. For now, though, with a single Mac iTunes installation, don't do it. We'll talk more about this later, including when it's probably safe to do so, and some cases where it isn't. You'll also find that you can plug in your iPhone and back it up while perhaps copying some music over to it. How you handle plugging an iOS device into your Mac's iTunes and how you buy or stream music are topics for another day, though. Sorry to dangle both of those in front of you and leave you hanging, but consider this. You've just seen how to get CDs into iTunes and listen to your music -- and it seemed easy to you, didn't it? That's the thing with iTunes and that's why we're doing this series. In nearly every case, every single part of iTunes is actually fine. It's only the sheer weight of options that makes this a bloated, complex app. Keep up with AppleInsider by downloading the AppleInsider app for iOS, and follow us on YouTube, Twitter @appleinsider and Facebook for live, late-breaking coverage. You can also check out our official Instagram account for exclusive photos. https://goo.gl/KubfqU

[lya-dustin]

A part of me wants to give Michael a girlfriend (perhaps the goth or preppy daughter of one of the Henrys for comedic purposes) but wt the same time he's gonna be too busy trying to stop oliver from killing him and felix

[lya-dustin]

For a comedy of errors

[lya-dustin]

🌤️

love you juli!

Love you too my favorite orphan hater💙💙💙💙

A Comedy of Non-mathematical Errors

“Should we do something about his hair, mum?” Venetia asks, looking at him as if he were a live size Ken doll.

[lya-dustin]

am i really inventing a subplot where felix helps michael get a girl's number just so i can have a goth character named henrietta (named after her dad, one of the henries)who is really passionate about forensic science?

[lya-dustin]

A Comedy of Non-mathematical Errors

Title by @exitpursuedbyavulcan

Plot by @apothe-roses , @elizarbell , @exitpursuedbyavulcan , and myself

Rated: M 🔞, MDNI

Divider by @saradika

Oliver had moved heaven and earth to make Felix Catton love him and only him and this summer was his last chance to make it happen. It had taken his all to gain an invitation to Saltburn and he did not feel a shred of remorse for who he stepped over to get there.

He had not expected to find Michael Gavey there, nor did he anticipate how much the math genius would affect his plans for a summer to die for.

Prologue

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

[lya-dustin]

A Comedy of Non-mathematical Errors

Prologue

It is a truth universally acknowledged that the eldest Catton is always a maths genius.

Through careful selection of life partners and a regime called the Catton Method, the finances of the Catton Family are always secured through the eldest child for the next generation.

The other children after may be savants like their elder sibling thanks to their genetics and upbringing, but the first born must always be a math genius.

Felix River Catton was not a maths genius no matter how much his poor dear parents tried.

It was not his fault ---nor his mother, Elspeth, having a DPhil in History of Art--- it was the fault of the wretched nanny who kidnapped Michael Cherwell Catton, Felix’s fraternal twin brother when she took him out for a walk and only the overturned pram was found.

Felix’s grandmother had blamed his mother all the same because it was her empathy that led to her hiring a troubled nanny instead of one without a history theft and drug abuse.

No one had expected her to steal a fucking baby especially from his nursery in Saltburn.

Just like that the true heir to Baronetage of Saltburn disappeared from the face of the earth ---and it was the heartlessness their grandmama displayed during their grief that led to Aunt Federica running away to America.

The Catton family would be fucked in the coming recession and no hope seemed to appear on the horizon ---Venetia sadly was not a maths genius either.

That was until Felix saw how outcast Maths student, Michael C. Gavey, ate a crunchie bar on Christmas Eve.

He was tall and blonde and ate a crunchie just as Felix’s father and his little sister, Venetia, do in private due to the strangeness of it. Looked like his mum’s younger brother does, right down to the carabiner on his cargo pants and the glasses.

Could it be that this was his long-lost brother?

There was only one way to find out without Farleigh thinking he’d lost it.

Felix needed to make Michael’s only friend, whatever his name was, his friend and gain an introduction.

A/N: this actually a crack fic fix it au written as if it were a serious fic, if you want a plot that makes sense you may not find it here

Thank you @exitpursuedbyavulcan @elizarbell @apothe-roses for this wonderful idea and the title

[lya-dustin]

A Comedy of Non-mathematical Errors

Chapter 1

No matter how he tries, he cannot get Oliver to make an introduction.

In fact, Michael had already left the King's Arms when Felix spotted Oliver.

“Rather liked his shirt, the pun's fucking hilarious, tell him I said so.” Felix said when he and Oliver went back to his place since Oliver was too hammered to leave.

“I’ll tell him.” Oliver promised and never did.

Despite Felix’s attempts to get Michael to speak to him, all that happens is that he learns his brother hates him.

Like hate hates him.

“He thinks you are a vapid cunt who doesn’t even know how to read.” Oliver puts it plainly after his last attempt before finals ends in abject failure.

Felix is hurt by that, especially because he had hoped everyone was exaggerating about it.

So hurt he doesn’t go out drinking with Farleigh, Annabel, and India.

So hurt he studies all night for his final exam.

It is strangely rewarding to earn something on his own. So rewarding he cannot stop himself from cornering Michael to show him.

“What makes you think I care about your fucking score?” Michael asks angrily and confused. “Daddy’s money bought you the school either way.”

“I studied; I worked my ass off to get this score. Just because I like fun and aren’t a maths genius like you and dad, it doesn’t mean I’m a dumb ass, Michael Cherwell Catton.” Felix has never bothered to defend himself like this, but he is about to change this nerd’s life.

“My name is Michael Gavey. Catton is your last name, genius.” Michael may hate him more when he tells him he is his brother, not just a brother, but twin brother.

“About that, Mrs. Gavey isn’t your real mum. Your middle name is Cherwell because mine is River, and you were kidnapped as a baby by our nanny.” Felix knows it sounds fucking ridiculous and has said long lost brother tell him so saying he should lay off the drugs.

“Stay away from me, Catton.” The blond warns, shoving him away, but Felix knows he can’t, not if they want to confirm or deny his suspicions.

“Let’s make a deal, we take a DNA test. If I’m wrong, we’ll never even breathe in the same room again, but if I’m right I’m taking you to Saltburn where you belong.” Felix offers his hand and spits on his palm as he presents his deal.

“Fine, I’ll do it, but you’re paying for this bullshit. Catton.” Michael squared up as if he were more than just the creepy nerd everyone knew him as.

“We have a deal.” Felix continues to offer his hand to make it binding, but his brother refuses to shake it.

Fucking unsanitary, he said.

Felix is so excited he can’t help but he calls his mother to tell her after he drags Michael to the nearest lab and gets tested.

Two days later everyone including the butler and poor dear Pamela is there waiting with bated breath as Michael opens the test results.

Michael Cherwell Gavey is Michael Cherwell Catton, the baby boy that was kidnapped ---and declared dead--- twenty years ago today.

Mama is crying, dad excited knowing the family is saved from ruin, Venetia is cautious, Farleigh pretends he didn’t torment him during the past year and Felix is so happy his hunch was right he completely forgot to even tell Oliver when he called him to cancel their plans for tonight this morning.

“You must come live with us; we must make up for the twenty years you spent away from us.” His mother held Michael’s hands as she kept the affection to a minimum, sensing he was uncomfortable with it.

Michael, still stunned, accepts only because no one can say no to mum.

“You are going to love Saltburn, Mickey.”

Michael had the occasional fantasy of meeting his father as all fatherless children do, but he never thought he would end up being a completely different person related to Felix fucking Catton.

Even worse, his twin fucking brother.

There is no logical explanation for this. Sure, babies get kidnapped at an alarming rate, but how did he manage to escape the radar when his name is the same his parents gave him.

Sweet baby Jesus, did he overdo it with the beer last night?

He can’t recall having more than a pint, but a fucked-up drink from overdrinking made more sense than this.

And yet the tests didn’t lie, science much like math couldn’t lie.

“A friend of Felix’s is coming to stay with us, I think Felix said he was a friend of yours too.” Elspeth Catton is nice, if a bit snobbish, and after accepting her invitation to their estate, took him shopping for a proper wardrobe.

While she did like his math pun shirts, Elspeth said she detested ugliness and her children were not ugly, just a healthy amount of strange.

“He was, or never was a friend of mine. Oliver Quick licks too many boots for my tastes.” Michael admits and while he dreads having to see him again ---worse endure Felix and Farleigh’s vapidness all summer--- the maths genius has always wanted his pound of flesh.

Now that he has everything Felix has and some more, he was going to make Oliver fucking Quick regret tossing aside for Felix.

“I suppose his harsh life made him that way, Felix told me he lost his father recently and his situation at home is less than ideal.” The blonde woman said with pity, as if being middle class and having two parents and two sisters was such a burden.

The dead father he believes it, Michael had not spoken to him since he confronted him at the library, but there is no fucking way Oliver has known actual suffering.

“Perhaps the summer may have us all three be friends.” Or the worst of enemies.

Nothing would kill Oliver like having Felix replace him with Michael. After all what is a friend to your own fucking brother?

[lya-dustin]

The Ewanverse Family Tree

for shits and giggles and A Comedy of Non-Mathematical Errors

a collaboration by @toms-cherry-trees @elizarbell @huramuna

Family tree

9th and 10th century

(the last kingdom)

Osferth + unknown wife

19th century

Mr. and Mrs. Bennett

(World on Fire)                                                                     

Douglas Bennett + Josie Bennett 

-Tom Bennett                                                            

-Lois Bennett 

Vera Chase

(The Halycon)

Margaret ‘Peggy’ Bennett+ Mr. Taylor

William ‘Billy’ Taylor

unknown sister

(Granchester)

Unknown Bennett sibling

-Abraham

20th century

Bennett Family post wwii

Tom Bennett + Diane Shelby (oc)

-Thomas Bennett Jr(oc)

-Elizabeth Bennett (oc)

Bennett Family

1960s

(Saltburn)

Tom Jr + some rich girl he met in Oxford in the 60s (unclear how he became a peer)

Elspeth Catton

Eadmund Bennett (basis GRRM used for Aemond Targaryn)

Micah Bennett

Lizzie + several unnamed men she hooked up with during the 60s and 70s

Billy Washington’s mom, Val Washington(Trigger Point)

Will from Salad Days’ dad

Jack from Fire’s mom

Bennett Family

1980s-1990s

Tom Jr's kids and grandkids

Elspeth + Sir James Catton

-Michael Cherwell Catton

-Felix River Catton

-Venetia Trinity Catton

Eadmund Bennett + Alice Rivers

-Ettore Rivers

Micah Bennett (via sperm donation)

Genyen/Shawn (Doctors)

Lizzie’s grandkids

Lana and Billy Washington (Trigger Point)

Will(Salad Days)

Jack and his brother (Fire)

Daniel from the veggie addicts video

Every single small role Ewan has ever been on

[lya-dustin]

Wip summary tag

Rules: summarize your WIP in 15 2-5 word bullet points

Thanks @corporalicent

Shock and Delight

Pretend relationship

Estranged childhood friends to lovers

Uncle/niece incest

Lesbian Alicent Hightower

The printing press was invented

Bridgerton au

The dance doesn't happen

Otto Hightower gets hitched too

Rhaena x Daeron

Alys is Alicent’s lover

Qyle Martell is here too

Dramedy

Helaegon has a ginger wife

Aemond unlearns misogyny

Viserys still dies

Cupid kills with Arrows

Queen Charlotte Au

Aemond’s canon trauma around sex

Otto dies

Otto killed aemma conspiracy

Alicent is aro ace

Green stands for aromantic

Some hints of smut

Nudity

Targcest, duh!

Septa Teora = proto-psychologist

They all talk it out

Garmund Hightower x Rhaena Targaryen

Arranged marriage

Time skip

15 kids didn't stay a joke

All is Bliss part 2

(Haven't written it lol)

So much trauma

Aftermath of the dance and part 1

Baela x Alyn Velaryon= open marriage

Jealous!Aemond

Joanna Westerling/Lannister x Daemon Targaryen

Helaena turns into a zealot

Widowhood kinda rocks

Suitors everywhere

Cregan motherfucking Stark

Dalton 'the Red Kraken' Greyjoy

Aenys is really white passing

Conspiracy that aenys isn't Aemma’s

Rumor Aemma slept with Criston

Lady Alys Towers of Harrenhal

Aemon is born 'premature'

A Comedy of Non-mathematical Errors

Michael Gavey is a Catton

Secret twins

Crack fic

Fix it fic

Revenge make over

No one dies

Venetia eats like Michael

Goth detective!Henriette x Michael

Felix is actually smart

Farleigh is writing a novel

Elspeth is Tom Bennett's granddaughter

Young Pamela was like Michael

🔝Causes Michael an existential crisis

Oliver Quick loses badly

Sir Michael Cherwell Catton (of) Saltburn

Tagging: @justrainandcoffee @arcielee @emilykaldwen @zablife @runnning-outof-time @toms-cherry-trees @the-common-cowgirl @slytherincursebreaker

[julyzaa]

Thanks @emilykaldwen for the tag

RULES: Post the last sentence you wrote (fanfic / original / anything) and tag as many people as there are words in the sentence.

Because Oliver is an opportunistic bootlicking cunt.

-- a comedy of (non-mathematical) errors

Tagging: @justrainandcoffee @moral-terpitude @runnning-outof-time @zablife @look-at-the-soul @mrkdvidal1989 @rysko @call-sign-shark

[allenmendezsr]

Mathematical Quickies & Trickies

New Post has been published on https://autotraffixpro.app/allenmendezsr/mathematical-quickies-trickies/

Mathematical Quickies & Trickies

 Buy Now    

Fear not math, fear God.

The Mathematical Quickies & Trickies E-Book Series NOW AVAILABLE for the FIRST TIME for non-iPad users!

Tired of constantly being fooled by tricky math questions? No longer do you need to, because help is now available.

An ideal e-book for numbers lovers—$9.99 ONLY

Singapore’s bestselling Mathematical Quickies & Trickies, which has sold over 90,000 copies locally, contains more than 300 non-routine problems to enhance students’ mathematical problem-solving skills. With many creative worked examples and questions, and with cartoons sprinkled throughout the book, Mathematical Quickies & Trickies would appeal primarily to these audiences:

* grades 5-7 students and teachers looking for some fertile trick and tricky questions;

* mathletes preparing for local and regional contests and competitions;

* problem solvers longing to be challenged by questions whose obvious solutions are never the correct ones for what offhand appears to be true is false.

With proper insight, you’ll learn how to solve these tricky problems almost instantly, whose solutions are almost never the correct ones. You need no longer be caught off-guard; instead, you’ll learn to solve these questions confidently—how to tame these counter-intuitive questions into routine ones.

To buy the e-book version of Mathematical Quickies & Trickies, click HERE for $9.99 ONLY!

Contents 1. Mental Computation I 2. Mental Computation 2 3. Number Series 4. A Tricky Way with Fractions 5. Test Your Calculator Proficiency 6. Simplifying a Complex Fraction 7. Recurring Decimals 8. Is Zero an Even or Odd Integer? 9. Casting Out Nines 10. Be a Calculator Expert 11. Division by 9 12. Number Riddles 13. Ten Steps to be Math Smart 14. Shortcuts a la Trachtenberg 15. Geometrical Quickies 1 16. Geometrical Quickies 2 17. Geometrical Quickies 3 18. (Sugar + Coffee) + Milk = Sugar + (Coffee + Milk) 19. Applications of Number Laws 20. Law of One 21. Distributive Law 22. More Applications of Distributive Law 23. The Joy of Guesstimation 24. Are You a Fermi Disciple? 25. Bravo Singapore 26. Lightning Calculators 27. Geometrical Quickies 4 28. Some Calculator Quickies Answers & Solutions Bibliography & References

Type of e-book: Nonfiction, problem solving, recreational, Singapore math, trick questions Audiences: Suitable for Grades 4-7 (or Primary 4-7 levels) Cost of e-book: $9.99 File format: PDF (10.6 MB zipped file) Delivery: Via direct download from Order Confirmation e-mail Product Queries: kcyan.mathplus(Replace this parenthesis with the @ sign)gmail.com

You can buy the e-book version of Mathematical Quickies & Trickies from:

ClickBank (click HERE) for $9.99 ONLY!

Sample chapter: Casting Out Nines c9_quckiest

For information about the Author. Fan Page for Mathematical Quickies & Trickies, click HERE.

On Amazon.com, a printed copy of Mathematical Quickies & Trickies is priced at US$12.90.

This long-awaited sequel of Mathematical Quickies & Trickles comes with many creative worked examples and questions, with cartoons sprinkled throughout the book to keep in line with the same irreverent and fun spirit of the previous book.

A wallet-friendly Singapore math problem-solving book for $9.99 ONLY

In addition to 300+ trick and tricky questions, More Mathematical Quickies & Trickles comes with more than 25 five-minute enrichment mathematics items, aimed at enhancing the mathematical problem-solving skills of problem solvers.

You won’t only be exposed to different problem-solving techniques, commonly used in answering math contests and competitions questions, but also learn to appreciate elegant or intuitive solutions.

More Mathematical Quickies & Trickies would appeal primarily to these audiences:

* grades 6-8 students and teachers looking for some fertile trick and tricky questions;

* mathletes preparing for local and regional contests and competitions;

* problem solvers longing to be challenged by questions whose obvious solutions are never the correct ones for what offhand appears to be true is false.

To buy the e-book version of More Mathematical Quickies & Trickies, click HERE for $9.99 ONLY!

Contents 1. Creative GST 2. Are You Calculator-Smart? 3. What Is the Easy Way? 4. The Magic of Three Consecutive Numbers 5. Twitter Math @MathPlus 6. What Is 27 x 37, Really? 7. Humanizing 1, 2, 3 8. A Mathophobia Kit 9. WITs: 13 Ways to Attain Mathematical Excellence 10. Facebook Math: Numeracy vs. Literacy 11. Thou Shalt Not Divide By Zero 12. Math Jokes to Relieve Stress 13. Look-see Proofs 14. Some PhD Math Questions 15. Mathematical Prayers 16. The Largest Product 17. What’s Wrong?: A Comedy of Mathematical Errors 18. The Aha! Myth 19. Sam Loyd’s Toughies 20. The Tuesday Boy Problem 21. What Is 1 + 1, Really? 22. In Love with Cryptarithms 23. Mathematical Kiasuism 24. The Mathemagic of 142857 25. The Lighter Side of Singapore Math 26. K C Yan’s Laws & Lores 27 Flee and Free from the FREE Answers/Hints/Solutions Bibliography & References

Type of e-book: Nonfiction, problem solving, recreational, Singapore math, trick questions Audiences: Suitable for Grades 6-8 (or Primary 6 – Secondary 2 levels) Cost of e-book: $9.99 File format: PDF (16.4 MB zipped file) Delivery: Via direct download from Order Confirmation e-mail Product Queries: kcyan.mathplus(Replace this parenthesis with the @ sign)gmail.com

You can buy the e-book version of More Mathematical Quickies & Trickies from:

ClickBank (click HERE) for $9.99 ONLY!

Sample chapter: Mathematical Jokes ch12_more_quckiest

For information about the Author. Fan Page for More Mathematical Quickies & Trickies, click HERE.

On Amazon.com, a printed copy of More Mathematical Quickies & Trickies is priced at US$12.90.

Bored by drill-and-kill geometry questions in your school textbook? Do you always feel ill-equipped to tackle those tricky questions in geometry?

Geometrical Quickies & Trickies may be the right place to broaden and deepen your visualization skills in solving geometry trick and tricky questions, commonly set in mathematics contests and competitions.

A book on trick and tricky questions in geometry

Not only you’ll be equipped with the problem-solving strategies and heuristics in solving non-routine geometry questions, but you’ll also be enriched with no fewer than 20 items of recreational geometry to enhance your appreciation with many hours of aha! moments.

Geometrical Quickies & Trickies would appeal primarily to these audiences:

* grades 6-9 students and teachers looking for some fertile trick and tricky geometry questions;

* mathletes preparing for local and regional contests and competitions;

* problem solvers longing to be challenged by geometry questions not normally discussed in the normal mathematics classroom.

To buy the e-book version of Geometrical Quickies & Trickies, click HERE for $9.99 ONLY!

Geometrical Quickies & Trickies is suitable for grades 6-9 problem solvers and mathletes, and for teachers and tutors who desire to challenge (or torture) their students mathematically. It contains over 200 non-routine geometry questions that may be used to separate the nerd of mathletes from the herd of drill-and-kill specialists.

Contents

What is a Circle?

Three Famous (or Notorious) Geometrical Problems

Non-Euclidean Geometry for Goondus

How Many Regions?

That Holy Little Geometry Book

Fun with Areas and Perimeters

Always a Parallelogram!

The Malfatti’s Problem

The Beauty of Pi

The Zero Option

The Golden Ratio by Paper Folding

The Ubiquity of Phi

Matchstick Mathematics

The Rolling Circle Question

Two Useful Circle Properties

Proving the Obvious

Sanguku—Japanese Temple Geometry

Applications of Pythagorean Theorem

Visualizing Infinity

Geometrical Idiosyncrasies Answers/Hints/Solutions Bibliography & References

Type of e-book: Nonfiction, problem solving, recreational math, Singapore math, trick questions, geometry, enrichment math Audiences: Suitable for Grades 6-8 (or Primary 6 – Secondary 2 levels) Cost of e-book: $9.99 File format: PDF (10.6 MB zipped file) Delivery: Via direct download from Order Confirmation e-mail Product Queries: kcyan.mathplus(Replace this parenthesis with the @ sign)gmail.com

You can buy the e-book version of Geometrical Quickies & Trickies from:

ClickBank (click HERE) for $9.99 ONLY!

Sample chapter: The Rolling Circle Unit 14

For information about the Author.

On Amazon.com, a printed copy of Geometrical Quickies & Trickies is priced at US$12.90.

More e-books are on the way—look out for them!

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