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#also lxc's gonna figure out he's genderqueer in a few years
iamwestiec · 3 years
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June 27: Nie Mingjue, ace king
asexual Nie Mingjue, queer Lan Xichen, what even is flirting, rated T
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Contrary to popular (Huaisang's) belief, Nie Mingjue can in fact tell when people are flirting with him.
It's just, well, easier to pretend he doesn't. Nie Mingjue's a big, buff guy, so when he's friendly and affable and cheerfully misinterprets any flirting, then women tend to assume he's gay, and men tend to assume he's straight, and neither is quite right, but either way, he's planted himself solidly in the bro zone once more without any awkward conversations or needing to turn anyone down directly.
Which is why he can't quite figure out Lan Xichen’s deal. He was fairly sure the man was flirting with him when they first met at the gym. (Lan Xichen’s traps and lats, Nie Mingjue will readily admit, are downright enviable. He doesn't need to be interested anyone that way to recognize that.)
Nie Mingjue had expected him to go the way of so many other gym flirtations after a few rounds of his patented cheerfully oblivious act, but Lan Xichen had instead just backed way off the obvious flirting while continuing to extend cheerful overtures, offer to spot his lifts (and then actually do it), and greet him with that same dazzling smile every time they're at the gym at the same time.
"You're sure he's not just flirting more subtly?" Huaisang asks, when Nie Mingjue comes home from the gym once more buzzing with the weird energy working out with Lan Xichen always leaves him. "Some guys like the challenge of pulling a 'straight dude,' you know."
Nie Mingjue shakes his head. He's run into those kind of guys occasionally, and they do get the awkward conversation—and the smile with all the teeth he learned from his one and only ex. (They're still friends. Meng Yao had been great, back when Nie Mingjue was coming to the realization that, no, actually, he wasn't interested in sex with men either.)
"He's not flirting at all anymore," he says. "And you know I can tell. He's just so... intensely friendly."
Huaisang laughs at that, not unkindly. "Well, Da-ge, he just might want to be friends, then. Real friends, not just gym buddies."
Huh. Nie Mingjue had always vaguely wondered how people made friends as adults. Maybe that's it after all.
So the next time they're both at the gym, after they've finished their workouts and chatted through their cooldown stretches and are grabbing their post-grind smoothies—and okay maybe they've developed something of a routine while Nie Mingjue wasn't looking—Nie Mingjue asks, "You hike, right?"
"Sometimes," Lan Xichen replies, like it's not a total non-sequitur to the conversation they've been having about protein supplements. "I haven't been in awhile, but I do enjoy it. You?"
"There's a day hike I've been wanting to do, if you're interested. Huaisang sometimes goes with me, but he declared this one, 'too few birds, too much elevation,' and I was thinking it'd be fun for us to hang out together somewhere besides the gym."
"Somewhere that doesn't smell like sweaty feet, you mean?" Lan Xichen laughs. "I'd like that a lot," he says with one of those wide, warm smiles.
They trade numbers and pick a day and text a great deal over the next couple weeks, and that's how Nie Mingjue finds himself here, taking a hydration break at a scenic overlook halfway back down a mountain with Lan Xichen. It's been honestly perfect. The hike was everything he'd hoped for—great views and a decent athletic challenge—and the company is excellent. He and Lan Xichen match pace easily, chatting about little brothers, cooking mishaps, and a surprise shared love of movie musicals during the less strenuous portions of the climb. He's more relaxed than he can remember being in a long time, right up until Lan Xichen says, "Mingjue, can I ask you something? No wrong answer."
Hell.
He nods for Lan Xichen to go ahead and hopes he's not about to ask what he thinks he's about to ask.
"Am I reading you wrong, or did you mean for this to be a date?" And there it is. "If you did, it's been a great one, it's only... I didn't think you went in for that sort of thing."
He—what?
"What?"
Lan Xichen grins playfully. "Mingjue, I don't know if you've noticed, but you get hit on at the gym, like, a lot." Nie Mingjue raises an unimpressed eyebrow at him, and he laughs. "Yeah, I figured. Anyway, you always turn them down—guys, ladies, whoever—but you've also never mentioned a significant other or anything like that, so I figured you just didn't date. But then it also sometimes feels like you're flirting with me? So, I just wanted to check in. I really enjoy hanging out with you, either way."
That's... okay, that's a lot. Nie Mingjue mentally reviews his interactions with Lan Xichen, today and over the last few months at the gym, and realizes he has been flirting with him. It's apparently easier to recognize in the other direction. "I'm sorry!" he blurts.
"It's not unwelcome," Lan Xichen says, still smiling.
"No, I mean—" Ugh, Awkward Conversation time. "I'm ace. Like, the 'not interested in any kind of sex, with anyone, ever' kind."
"Oh," says Lan Xichen, "cool. Thank you for sharing that with me, Mingjue."
Nie Mingjue shrugs and gestures back towards the path. Lan Xichen falls into step beside him. 'Cool, thanks,' is not the worst reaction he's gotten, Nie Mingjue supposes.
"So not flirting then," Lan Xichen says after awhile with a chuckle. "I can't always tell. Sorry for putting you on the spot."
"No, it's... I was flirting, I think," Nie Mingjue admits. Lan Xichen’s been so honest with him, and he wants to respond in kind. "But I'll cut it out."
Lan Xichen's ears flush red. "I mean, you don't have to," he says. "I like being gym buddies. I've liked texting with you lately. I've really, really liked today. If you wanted to do more of all that, with or without flirting, I'd like that too."
"You'd want to date me," Nie Mingjue clarifies, "even though I just told you I'm not ever gonna want to have sex with you?"
Lan Xichen's lips twitch into one of his sarcastic smiles. "Gosh, Mingjue, everything's not about sex, you know."
Nie Mingjue throws his head back and laughs. "Fine then," he says, "it's a date."
🖤🤍💜
Shoutout to @shadaras for suggesting hiking when I got stuck on a good schroedinger's date activity!
#PrideMonthSnippets Masterpost!
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