#also that skiing pic 🥵🥵🥵

[thisgirlisonfayeeer]

Thomas Gibson + sports 🥵

bonus: football flamingo

[otonymous]

Good In Bed: A Tears of Themis Pick-A-Card Tarot Reading (NSFW)

Dim the lights, light some candles, slip into those sexy vibes with your favourite Bump N’ Grind playlist cus it’s about to get hot and heavy in this headspace 🔥🥵

That’s right.

In today’s (inaugural!) Pick-A-Card reading from yours truly, we will be harnessing the power of our favourite otome characters and the tarot in order to glean the sexual proclivities and personalities of our future love partner!  And the best part?  You don’t even have to know anything about the Tears of Themis fandom in order to participate!

This idea came to me in the dead of night and just wouldn't leave me alone so here we are! Please feel free to let me know in the comments below if you enjoyed this and would be interested in seeing similar content in the future!

Before we begin, here are just a few things to note: 👀

ABSOLUTELY NO MINORS PLEASE AND THANK YOU!!

These readings are timeless.  You are meant to see them right now, as you are, wherever you are (unless you are driving or operating heavy machinery or operating on someone else.  If that’s the case, please kindly put down your phone.  Like a good lover, this reading is willing to wait 😂) 💌

Legal disclaimer: these readings are made solely for entertainment purposes!  As such, use them for fun and fun alone! 🤩💕

While tarot cards definitely have their own “standard” meanings/definitions, I also like to infuse a healthy dose of my own intuition when it comes to reading them in order to develop a coherent message!  Moreover, because these are general readings, not everything will resonate with everyone.  Please exercise your own discretion and intuition - pick what works for you and disregard everything else!

With that being said, let's get into the reading by first taking a moment to take a few deep breaths to find a sense of calm.  Take a look at the pictures and (as hard as this may be) try not to be swayed solely by the pic of your favourite guy 😂 Maybe there's something in the colours that draws your eye, or perhaps the expression on his face reminds you of someone you know, or makes you feel some sort of way.  Once you make your selection, feel free to scroll down to the reading for your pile of choice!

I hope you all enjoy this! - XOXO, Otonny 😘

Potential trigger warnings: profanity, slight mentions of dominant behaviour, BDSM, roleplaying, outdoor sex, dirty talking, life struggles

Decks used:

The Rider-Waite Tarot Deck (Pocket Edition)

Secret Garden Deck (by Jessica Le)

👇🏼(READINGS UNDER THE CUT!) 👇🏼

The Luke Pile:

(Tarot cards from left to right: 7 of Wands, 6 of Wands, 3 of Wands, Strength, 10 of Cups)

To my dear readers who have chosen the Luke pile:

WOW.

I feel like you’ve hit the literal passion jackpot with the next person lucky enough to win a place in your heart (and your bed LOL).

There is a ton of fiery, passionate energy in this spread as represented by the wands (aka the wooden staffs the folks are holding in the cards), which in turn represent the energy of pure passion, creativity, action, etc.  Think of the fire signs of the zodiac: Leo, Aries, Sagittarius.  Your next lover could very well have a sun sign that falls under one of these signs, or they could have lots of fiery elements elsewhere in their birth chart, especially a rising or moon sign (nb. a birth or natal chart is basically like a map of where the sun, moon and planets were in the skies above you at the moment you were born). It is of especial note that the Strength card (VIII) of the Major Arcana was drawn in this reading, which in itself is representative of the Leo zodiac sign — one known for exhibiting confidence, creativity, passion…and big hearts.

The overall picture I’m getting from this spread is one of warmth, happiness and fulfillment.  The abundance of the colour yellow and blue is reminiscent of sunshine and blue skies (see also the “Relax” card that was pulled, which literally encourages you to “delight in powdered gold sunshine”), and as fiery as this relationship is, it is also one of intense emotional connection and happiness, as represented by the happy couple (maybe even family) frolicking beneath a rainbow in the 10 of Cups card.

Your future lover seems like they are coming equipped with that dominant energy and may very well enjoy playful antics in the bedroom, even play fighting or wrestling (as per the imagery in the 7 of Wands card).  Either way, they play to win and they play for keeps as the notions of victory (6 of Wands) and conquest (3 of Wands) are always on their radar.  They, like the lion in the Strength card, strive to be the king or queen of the jungle, the leader of the pack, which, when it comes to the realm of love, means that there is little they would not do to win (and keep!) your heart.  Want them to fuck you like its their job and go all night without stopping?  You got it.  Just remember to follow the advice of the “Self-Care” card and “tend to your garden” the morning after — the garden here being your sore privates and inner thighs (tmi? LOL)

This person is a beast in the bedroom, and nothing gets this big cat purring as when the two of you can just chill and relax, truly basking in the tender sunshine of each other’s presence.

Dear reader, just know that you, too, will feel like you’ve literally won a prize and found the gold at the end of your own proverbial rainbow when this person comes into your life.  You’ll feel it in your heart as surely as the sun warms our skin on bright summer days.

The Artem Pile:

(Tarot cards from left to right: 4 of Cups, 9 of Cups, 7 of Cups, Ace of Swords, The World (XXI))

Welcome dear readers who have chosen the Artem pile!

Your next lover may seem a bit standoffish at first, perhaps a bit awkward, as if they haven’t had much experience in the realm of dating.  They may even seem a bit oblivious to the signs and signals that others send to them, as in the case of the man depicted in the 4 of Cups card: something is being offered to them, but they either just can’t see it or they aren’t interested.

But don’t be fooled.

For as aloof as this person may appear to be in everyday life, their inner world is one that is rich and full with emotion.  Like the man seen in the 9 of Cups card, they have a lot to give and offer when it comes to love.  It could very well be that your next lover will be a tough nut to crack, possibly because they are too shy to make the first move, or because they are still working through issues of past hurt.  But once they do, you’ll discover a beautiful, sensitive soul capable of great depths of love and romance.

In bed, this person will blow your mind with options (see the 7 of Cups card): they’ve got an entire lexicon of sexual positions at their disposal and won’t be shy about indulging in even the kinkiest of your desires.  From roleplaying and costumes to bondage and submission to the realm of public sex in a variety of locations, your lover is ready to do it all with you.  The sky is the limit when it comes to their sexual imagination.

Speaking of imagination, your lover is most turned on by words (see the Ace of Swords card).  The suit of Swords typically deals with the mind: the realms of reason, logic and razor-sharp intelligence.  They will have a way with words that will blow you away, having mastered the art of dirty talking, and they love to seduce you in this manner. Expect to receive texts from them throughout the day, casually mentioning how they can’t stop thinking about having your lips wrapped around their cock after talking about having a Cobb salad for lunch lol.

Best believe with this sensitive and cerebral lover that they’ll be more than happy to whisper in your ear about how tight and wet you are as they drive their hips against your own.  You’ll literally get your own play-by-play of the lovemaking session.  Your future lover might have some airy elements in their chart (Gemini, Libra, Aquarius) or might have a very Mercury dominant chart (e.g. Virgo or Gemini rising).

“Retreat” is necessary for “Self-Care” when it comes to your lover, and they will truly relish the moments when the two of you can just sit and be with each other, perhaps each doing their own thing but in the same room at the same time.  Whether they show it or not, they pick up on a lot of things like the moods of those around them, and they need a way to process it.  So they really need these moments of peace and quiet just to think and recharge their own batteries, so to speak.  Silence for your lover, dear reader, is just as important as the words they love to revel in once they become completely comfortable in your presence.

All in all, dear reader, you will feel like you have the world with this lover in your life (see the World card (XXI)).  They, themselves, have such a rich inner life that is so incredibly special they don’t share it lightly, with just anybody.  But once you gain access to their secret garden, you will find an exciting lover who isn’t afraid to experiment and is more than capable of recounting your own erotic love story back to you in juicy, explicit detail.

The Marius Pile:

(Tarot cards from left to right: Ace of Wands, 5 of Cups, The Hierophant (V), 6 of Pentacles, 3 of Wands)

Welcome dear readers who have chosen the Marius pile!

Sex with your future lover will legitimately feel like a spiritual experience, one that transcends mere physical lust or superficial feelings of love to reach deep into the psyche for much needed healing.

Your future lover innately has a very fiery, passionate, go-getter type energy (Ace of Wands), but something has happened in their lives to obscure that sunshine in their hearts.  When you first meet them, they may be in the midst of going through some hard times; trials and tribulations that are making it difficult for them to see past the clouds (the man in the 5 of Cups card is cloaked in black and the skies are grey.  He faces the three cups that have spilt while remaining seemingly oblivious to the two cups that haven’t that are just behind him.)

When they meet you, however, it will be as if there is an awakening.  You will help them see that life is not all about sorrow and struggle, and that hope exists even during the darkest hours.  In short, you will help them keep the faith in whatever they believed in before, perhaps via the structure and/or security that your love brings (the Hierophant).

And like the man giving alms to the less fortunate in the 6 of Pentacles card, your lover will see you in very much the same way: someone who has something of immense value to share, perhaps encouragement and moral support.

And so, gradually, the grey skies will recede to produce that burst of sunshine again, as seen in bright yellow background of the 3 of Wands card.  Your future lover, with your love and support, will feel free to take on the world again.  They will look out onto what seems at first glance to be a very barren landscape and see opportunity and adventure, as opposed to a lifeless desert, as they might have before. Their mindset has been completely transformed.

As mentioned previously, because of the deeply emotional connection between you and this person, sex with them is rarely ever just about satisfying an animalistic desire, though your lover is definitely passionate with that Ace of Wands energy.  They are mindful throughout the entire act, “being present” throughout it all. They truly enjoy the entire process of lovemaking and wouldn’t ever skimp on foreplay or aftercare.  Think of them going down on you for hours, their hands tenderly intertwined with yours as they do.  Moreover, I would not be surprised if tantric sex was on the radar with this person.

And as with the word “Wildflower,” you’ll find that your future lover is most definitely that: someone who may be a bit wild in bed and eager to experiment, especially with having sex in unconventional places in the great outdoors.  I’m definitely sensing some sagittarius vibes here.

The Vyn Pile:

(Tarot cards from left to right: 2 of Swords, 6 of Swords, King of Cups, King of Wands, 10 of Cups)

Welcome to my dear readers who have chosen the Vyn pile!

Your future lover will have a deeply healing energy, and your relationship could almost feel as if it is kismet, like you were meant to meet them in this lifetime (if you believe in reincarnation) because they are here to impart some important lessons to you, and not in a bad way either.

At the time of your first meeting, you might be going through a period in your life where you’ve been feeling blocked in some way, shape or form; struggling with indecision or an inability to see the way out of some situation you find troubling.  You might not even be interested in starting a relationship because you’re so caught up in dealing with your own issues (take a look at the closed-off stance of the woman depicted in the 2 of Swords; she is blindfolded and very much on guard).

That is where your future lover will come in, acting very much like the boatman in the 6 of Swords card to take you from one shore to another, showing you the way or leading you away from stormy waters to much calmer ones (look at the appearance of the sea on either side of the boat).  The 6 of Swords typically appears in a reading to signify the act of moving on from something, as confirmed by the “Move” card that was also pulled in this reading.

With both the King of Cups and King of Wands showing up in the same reading, your future lover will have an energy that is quite undeniable, perhaps an aura that immediately draws the notice of all eyes in the room the moment they step into it.  The King of Cups imparts great depth of emotion and the ability to navigate its waters.  The King of Wands, on the other hand, possesses that fiery energy that serves as the spark of creation, igniting engines to get things done.  Taken together, it means that when your lover speaks, people will listen, and you are no exception.  Not only are they charismatic to the core, they are also measured and wise — having them on your team is a giant boon.

As hinted at by the “Generosity” card that was pulled, your future lover will be incredibly generous with their time, feelings and energy when it comes to you, my dear readers.  They shoot straight from the heart and are not interested in the least in playing games when it comes to love; you can be clear of their intentions right from the start.  They will have absolutely no qualms about proclaiming you as the royal partner of their kingdom.  In fact, there is nothing they want more than to give you a life straight out of a fairytale, replete with a happily ever after ending (see the 10 of Cups card).

In bed, your lover knows what they are doing.  Like the kings, they are confident in who they are.  They may be a bit older than you and perhaps more experienced, but they are also wise enough to know that humility is the way to go in the bedroom: there is no one-size-fits-all approach when it comes to love making.  With the King of Cups energy, they will be patient when it comes to discovering every inch of your body and finding out just the right ways to touch you to make you scream with pleasure (which will definitely please the dramatics craved by the King of Wands).  And with the energy represented by the King of Wands, you can be sure that sex will never be boring.  Your partner is a literal fountain of creativity; be prepared to engage in some roleplaying replete with detailed costumes and scripts (how do you feel about being filmed, btw? 😂).  This lover might have a birth chart that’s well balanced with both water (Scorpio, Pisces, Cancer) and fire elements (Leo, Sagittarius, Aries).

Thank you all so much for participating in my first ever Pick-A-Card tarot reading!  I hope you all enjoyed it!  Please feel free to let me know your thoughts and feelings in the comments below! 💕Looking forward to hearing from you, and hope you all stay happy, healthy and safe until next time!

- XOXO, Otonny 🥰