#also: we always mean bimbo (affectionate) in this house

[heartsdefine]

every friend group should include:

a bimbo (pippa cross)

a mean bisexual (gemma doyle)

an even meaner lesbian (felicity worthington)

he/theys and she/theys (kartik & circe)

a token straight that's on thin ice (thomas doyle)

an astrology bitch who has everyone's birth chart memorized (ann bradshaw)

and a short king (simon middleton)

[majorbaby]

hello I would like to hear your thoughts on himbo trapper

Thank you for the question! it's a long one: TL;DR: I don’t hate himbo Trapper, sometimes I even enjoy it, but I think it’s a shallow interpretation and I’m a bit defensive of him because I think there’s plenty of evidence in the source to support a reading of him as being intelligent. Also I blabbed on about some of the other popular fanon characterizations of him that I see as being similarly flat.

On its face, i’m a fan of the himbo trapper concept and i see where it comes from:

He can’t play solitaire

Hawkeye: “You big, dumb strong silent types”

And imo, the strongest piece of evidence: when it comes to shenanigans/schemes, if he’s not the straight brawn to hawkeye’s brain (requiem for a lightweight), it’s always the case that hawkeye that comes up with the plan and trapper who helps him execute it - too many examples to name because this is practically every single episode they appear in 

And for fun, I’m fine with the stereotype because on the whole, it’s meant to be a positive thing. We have women to thank for taking a masculinized version of the term ‘bimbo’ - which has always been a pejorative hurled at women who are conventionally hot and therefore ‘stupid’, sexually promiscuous or just enticing to men - and immediately elevating it to the point where it’s not just seen as positive, it’s seen as highly desirable. A himbo will treat you right and won’t manipulate you, while also being a hot piece of ass - imo Trapper fits some of that criteria on screen but tbf, he’s also cheating on his wife and I think we’re meant to assume that she’s unaware of that, which I think is somewhat manipulative of him. Idk, I don’t have enough information about that. 

But there’s a few pieces of his characterization that are in direct conflict with the himbo archetype - as a society I think we value STEM a lot, so there’s this general idea that people in the medical field are ‘smarter’ than your average person but at the same time fatphobia, racism, ableism and misogyny are still rampant in medical settings leading to entire populations receiving sub-par care so… I don’t think you must accept that doctor = an intellectual in general. There’s different ways to be smart! Your having gone to medical school clearly doesn’t exempt you from being a critical consumer of all the medical texts you’ve read and being able to situate them in a socio-economic and political context when providing care. 

All of this to preface my saying that: he’s a surgeon. He’s at least intelligent enough in one way to be a surgeon and a good one at that, while recognizing that that isn’t the only thing I’m basing my argument on. 

He’s emotionally intelligent:

In Ceasefire he has the opportunity to gloat about his being right about there being no end to the conflict after having been openly doubtful the whole episode, but he knows that it’s not the time and he even encourages Hawkeye to remain optimistic – a truly  brainrot-inducing moment (affectionate) if there ever was one

Operation Noselift he’s just as earnest as Hawkeye trying to get Private Someguy (id remember his name) to accept himself as he is without going under the knife

Check-up don’t even talk to me about Check-up!!! Trapper could’ve accepted “you let me lean on you” as is. I mean, I think they both know what Hawkeye means by that and so do we the audience but I think his “What?” is making space for Hawkeye to be Hawkeye and spill his guts about his feelings because that is what Hawkeye needs; he does the same with Margaret, albeit while she is drunk off her ass, later on in the episode which is a nice moment for them because she reveals something (she’s playing house with Frank because he’s around) that I don’t think she’s ready to accept for herself, but Trapper listens to her. 

Bombed which gave me Trapper/Margaret brainrot, yeah he starts off hitting on her but he stops when she asks him too and he still picks up that she needs comfort, makes her laugh and reassures her that he’s coming from a good place. That is what I get from his suggestion that they cuddle and I think Margaret does too because she accepts. 

Kim - we learn he can be emotionally vulnerable even with his wife who, up til this point, is represented as something of a thorn in his side at worst, an ambiguous off-screen figure at best. 

These are some of the examples that stand out to me but there are many examples of his good bedside manner and empathy that he freely extends to one-off characters like Young-Hi and George. 

He’s pretty much toe-to-toe with Hawkeye in terms of witty dialogue, it’s just that he doesn’t often get the last word nor the spotlight. The role of the Trapper character is that of a follower to Hawkeye’s lead in their comedic and heroic scenes. Like if he comes off as being not quite as smart as Hawkeye (which I wouldn’t say is the case) then I think it’s a matter of their being deuteragonist and protagonist respectively, and the show playing up the ‘best surgeon in the army’ angle for Hawkeye in part as a way to save him from being disciplined for insubordination multiple times. 

And finally, I think it’s worth mentioning that at the onset of American involvement in the Korean War, the American public was generally supportive. That support eroded over time but I do think that the American government, in the 50s and also to this day, goes to significant lengths to circulate pro-war propaganda and convince its citizens that war is only way. During the Gelbart years (S1-4) there was strong, consistent anti-military messaging that extended to critique of traditional masculinity in general – this frequently manifests in how Trapper and Hawkeye are positioned on moral high ground vs. Frank, Margaret and the military. So like, Trapper was a part of all that. He was, at the very least, in league with the popular ACAB Hawkeye, Queer Hawkeye and general Rabble Rouser Hawkeye that are favourites of the fandom – I think it takes a certain degree of intelligence, whether emotional or intellectual, to resist and undermine state propaganda, especially at your own personal expense. And I’m giving that to Trapper because he was around when the show was aware of itself being specifically anti-US-imperialism, rather than just generally anti-war or even anti-death later on - which isn’t ‘less smart’ it’s just more vague and there’s less of a specific effort made by the state to brainwash citizens into thinking otherwise. There is a moment where Trapper appears to betray his moral and political (i’m using ‘political’ very loosely here) leanings when he goes to (presumably) kill the soldier in Radar’s Report but that is by far the exception not the rule and furthermore I’m not saying that people who are duped by the state and/or corporate entities into buying into the cycle of violence are “stupid” but I do think you have to actively fight against such indoctrination and one of the ways of doing that, aside from just being a compassionate person, is by learning to think critically for yourself. And I’m assuming Trapper has done one or both because he is as consistent as Hawkeye is in living those values. It helps that they have good chemistry and they’re bored and sticking it to the army is fun for them but imo they go pretty far sometimes just ‘for fun’. 

So, Trapper is a technically competent surgeon, is emotionally intelligent and has come to reject some of the values that are pretty well ingrained in the society he’s grown up in. I don’t hate himbo trapper but I don’t think he’s stupid. Far from it. 

Here are my less objective thoughts on the himbo trapper phenomenon and also have some straightforward trapper defense squad messaging: I’m generally interested in pointing out trends in fandom, although I admit that my tolerance for content I don’t vibe with has lessened significantly the more time I’ve been active in mash fandom (we’re coming up on one year of straight obsession) – but from what I can remember about the popular, general portrayals of Trapper in fandom that I don’t see as having much footing in the canon: he’s a himbo, he broke Hawkeye’s heart, he’s homophobic (HATE), he’s hypersexual, he can be violent, he ‘doesn’t do feelings’, he’s not good with words… everyone is entitled to their opinion but the more I reflect on Trapper, the more I watch his episodes, the more I’ve come to question a lot of these interpretations. I’ve already talked about him being a himbo, I’m not convinced he broke Hawkeye’s heart any more than Kyung-Soon or Carlye and I am certain it’s not intended to be a romantic breakup, he’s in league with Hawkeye in George – I’m not telling you what you can and can’t indulge in but, yk Hawkeye actually has a line to the effect of ‘i live with two dudes don’t call me a fairy’ and that’s got way more of a no-homo vibe to it than anything Trapper ever says. 

He’s not any more sexual than Hawkeye is, not even because he has a big dick. Hawkeye and BJ both throw punches at some point and I also wouldn’t argue that that makes them ‘violent’ in general, but Trapper who doesn’t do it at all is the violent one. There are plenty of ways to be vulnerable and forthcoming and emotional without spilling your guts and anyway anyone could read as repressed when you hold them up next to Hawkeye Pierce. An emotionally repressed man could not extend an olive branch to Frank Burns nor could he write his wife an earnest letter in the hopes that he will be able to adopt and raise an orphan child nor could he be shown to have such a clear investment in outcomes during the episodes where there’s no clear, tangible goal to Hawkeye’s schemes. 

This has turned into a critique of some of the more uncharitable interpretations of the character, on the list of which ‘himbo’ isn’t really all that bad. But I still think it flattens his character somewhat, like all these other interpretations do, and I can easily pick out a few examples of his canonical portrayal which challenge it. So while I’m not denouncing it completely because I think it can be fun and in the grand scheme of things, people can like whatever they want to like, I am sometimes inclined to gently push back on it. 

[iamtheblondestblonde]

Slides and Serendipity

Part Two (4.6k)

Part One 

AN: Finished the second part (yes I’m that bored) so have fun reading!!

Warnings: language, things are heating up but nothing too explicit

I had finally given up. There was no way that I could figure out what to wear to a hockey player party by myself, so I pulled out the big guns and called on a group facetime with the girls in Denver.

“You’ve barely left a week ago and I’m already jealous. I want to meet Tyler Seguin too!”, Mara exclaimed and I laughed. She was hockey obsessed, knowing everything there was to know about the sport and she had also been the one that had dragged the rest of us along to watch the Avalanche games.

“Can we please get back to the issue at hand here? I don’t know what to wear!”, I exclaimed frustrated. Instead of helping me pick out an outfit my three best friends had fangirled over Tyler the past 20 minutes.

“Honey it all depends on your expectations for the night. What do you want to happen?”, Emily asked and I groaned. I’d actually spent the bigger part of my morning debating over that question.

“I’m not so sure. I mean I kind of want to jump his bones because look at him, but I also know his reputation and I don’t know if one hookup is worth ruining the connection that we have already, I can’t imagine what that could turn into”, I sighed, falling back onto my bad and taking the iPad down with me.

“Okay so I think I know what you should do. The important thing is to not hook up with him right away, you gotta make sure that things don’t become awkward afterwards first. That doesn’t mean that you can’t tease the hell out of him until then though”, Lisa grinned conspirationally after presenting her plan. You could always count on her when it came to boy-advice. She’d made her fair share of mistakes with them throughout college after all.

They helped me rifle through my closet before finally picking out a sexy burnt orange bikini that would make me look great and a backless summer dress that was just short of not being socially acceptable anymore. Some light waterproof make up completed the bimbo look and I smiled proudly at my reflection in the mirror. I would never dumb down for a guy but I wasn’t completely above looking the part.

Not soon after it was almost time to leave. Tyler had already texted me asking me where I was at. I made sure Yogi had enough water, food and entertainment in his house outside and the backyard before locking up. Luckily he loved being outdoors more than anything.

I could hear the sounds of the party even before I turned the corner to Tyler’s house and by the volume there were definitely more than just a few people. His front gate was unlocked, which seemed a bit irresponsible to me considering his status, but I was also glad that I didn’t have to jump the gate in my short dress and sandals. I made my way to the backyard, following the sound of laughter around the house. At least he wasn’t stupid enough to leave his front door unlocked as well.

As I faced the crowd I was overwhelmed for a second. People were splashing around in the huge pool, dancing on its sidelines or lounging all over the area and as far as I could see everyone had drinks in their hands. It was impossible to spot Tyler in the chaos but before I could even start looking for him, I was ambushed by three labs who were excitedly greeting me.

I crouched down because bending over in that dress wasn’t really something to do in front of so many strangers and spent the next few minutes scratching as many ears as I could. Our cuddle sesh was interrupted by two wet arms sneaking around my shoulders and somehow pulling me up.

“Ew get off me”, I complained while trying to wiggle out of Tyler’s strong arms. I would be lying if I said that I didn’t enjoy him wrapped around me though. He finally, sadly, set me down and I turned around to hug him, wrapping my arms tightly around his bare torso. My dress was already clinging to me either way.

“You could have at least waited until I had a drink before getting me all wet”, I exclaimed, only realizing what I’d said after he started wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

“I’m sorry I just got so excited when I saw you���, he beamed at me and I then noticed that he probably already had a buzz going. I needed to catch up to him but not before enacting a part of the masterplan.

“The least you could do is help me out of that dress now”, I pouted, turning around again and lifting my hair up so he could untie the strings that held the dress together at the back.

“That’s an offer I’d never turn down”, he murmured before getting to work and I smirked, Lisa knew what she was talking about after all. After he’d finally managed to untie everything, he pushed the fabric down my shoulders. I wiggled my butt to get it down all the way while smiling at him over my shoulder. Tyler might be known for his womanizing ways but I went to MIT, I knew how to play with the opposite gender just as well.

“Any idea where to keep this?” I asked innocently after deliberately bending down and picking the now ridiculously small piece of fabric up. The look on his face was priceless and when some guy walked by commenting how he’d already had me almost naked after I’d just arrived, I finally burst out laughing. He rubbed his neck sheepishly before leading me inside the house and into one of the rooms in the back, promising no one would come in here to take my dress or shoes. I’d also made him promise to give me a small tour sometime after the party because I was now in the mood to get drunk.

“Do you want to play a round of beer pong with me?”, he asked as we got back outside and I nodded excitedly. The table was set up right next to the pool and currently unoccupied so we made our way over. I was about to ask him if he wanted to play against me instead when he said: “You start setting everything up, I’ll go grab Chubbs and his girlfriend, I know we’ll beat their asses.”

I was humming along to the music and organizing the cups when familiar arms wrapped around me again. Who knew that Tyler Seguin would be an affectionate drunk?

“This is Olivia, she’s super smart so she’s going to help me win. Olivia, these are Jamie and Katie”, he introduced me to the tall guy and the pretty blonde standing next to him. I waved at them before finishing pouring the beer in the last cup.

“You sure you’re ready for this?”, Jamie challenged and I laughed.

“I’m German. I bleed beer and everything that comes with it, so the question is are you ready?”, I grinned and took the ball from Tyler. He insisted on me going first because he was a gentleman, although I was pretty sure that that wasn’t entirely right. Him shamelessly checking me out ever since I’d gotten here was definitely anything but.

Jamie’s threat proved to be harmless and it wasn’t only because Tyler and I made up an amazing team, it was the fact that he straight up sucked. By the time we made the third shot Tyler and I had already made up a handshake to celebrate. Katie had made most of the shots for their team and even with Tyler and I doubling over with laughter we still beat them embarrassingly fast.

“We are amazing”, I sang and jumped up into Tyler’s outstretched arms. He lifted me off the ground and spun me around slightly before carefully placing me back on the pavement. Our next contenders were already setting up the table again and I shook my head to get back in the game.

We played round after round, leaving only for refills and didn’t lose a single one, we were truly the perfect team. After defeating the last couple that was willing to play against us, Tyler picked me up again but this time I quickly wrapped my legs around him so he wouldn’t drop me. I had, however, underestimated the amount of alcohol we’d just consumed and what it would do to his balance. He didn’t drop me at least, but we both fell backwards into the pool, still tightly wrapped around each other.

When we were standing upright again in the water Tyler wrapped his hands around my thighs and pushed me up a little before grasping me right below my butt. I was now a few centimeters taller than him, so I had to smile down at him while pushing his hair back with both hands before finally wrapping them around his neck. The way we were pressed up against each other sent little shocks throughout my entire body and they silenced the tiny voice at the back of my head that was screaming at me to untangle myself.

While I didn’t want to let go of him, I also knew that I needed to get the dirty thoughts out of my mind so I desperately looked around for a distraction.

“You know the waterslide is just a little over the top, but I do like the way the waterfall looks”, I joked and felt his breath fan across my neck as he started chuckling. The vibrations from his chest made him rub against me in a way that instantly made my nipples hard and I really hoped that he wasn’t able to feel them through the bikini top. This was definitely not helping at all. To make things worse he now tightened his grip on me before slowly making his way over to said waterfall.

“Lean back”, he whispered in my ear as we stood right in front of it and I slowly followed his instructions, not wanting to fall over again. His hands wandered up to my hips for more leverage and I shuddered as he lightly brushed my butt on the way. This had gone way further than just teasing but I just couldn’t bring myself to stop.

I closed my eyes right before the cold stream hit the top of my head. I knew that with me arching into him my boobs were pushed up to him and that he was probably taking a good look at them, but I couldn’t find myself to care. A small content sigh escaped my lips as the cool water soothed my scalp that had been exposed to the burning sun all afternoon.

“Fuck are you trying to kill me?”, he asked, his voice suddenly quiet and raspy.

The sexual tension was now thicker than it had been during some of my hookups and we were both still partly dressed. If he’d gotten out of the pool right this moment to take me to his bedroom, I’d have let him do anything to me.

Before I could make any stupid mistakes, like dropping my hand to the front of his shorts so I could confirm my suspicions, something beige and furry slid down the water slide before almost landing on top of us. The resulting splash cleared my thoughts for the most part and I unwrapped my legs from him, slowly sliding down. Neither of us could stop the sounds that were coming out of our mouths as I accidentally brushed against his hard dick on my way down though.

“I’ll give you a moment okay”, I said softly, leading Gerry away to play somewhere else in the pool so Tyler had the chance to compose himself. I needed the time for myself because I’d let things go way too far.

“What the hell happened to don’t hook up with him right away?!” I muttered to myself as I got out of the water afterwards. I turned around just in time to see Jamie whack Tyler across the head before heatedly gesturing in my general direction. I had a feeling that whatever they were arguing about had something to do with me.

After our little bubble burst I not only realized how many people had probably seen us do whatever that was in the pool, but also how the temperature had dropped quite a bit. Without the excitement from playing games and the heat of Tyler’s body pressed against mine I got goosebumps all over my body. I mentally cursed myself for not bringing a towel or a change of decent clothes that I could change into now.

“Shit you’re cold”, I heard Tyler exclaim as he reached me and before I could even respond anything, he was already pulling me into the house. Without the cold breeze my body started relaxing again but Tyler kept on pulling me further inside.

“I’m fine now, I can make a quick trip home to change into something warmer”, I protested but he still wouldn’t let go of my hand. We finally reached his destination and he flicked on the lights in the otherwise dark room. Only now did I realize that he had literally dragged me to his bedroom. I was about to tell him that I wouldn’t hook up with him, having shook off the daze from earlier when he held up his hands, stopping me.

“This is not what it seems like, I have innocent motives I swear. I just wanted to grab you a towel and a warm sweater for you to pull over because there’s no way I’m letting you walk anywhere alone like that”, he gestured up and down my barely covered body and I knew he had a point. It was way too cold to only be wearing that dress as well.

He told me to stay put and quickly disappeared into a door on the right side of the room, reemerging seconds later with a hoodie in his one hand and a set of new clothes for him in his other.

“This one should be long enough I think. You can use my bathroom through the door on the left and there’s a towel heater so perhaps if you put your bikini over that while taking a shower it’ll be halfway dry afterwards. Feel free to use anything you want, except for maybe my toothbrush and come find me when you’re done, okay?”

He tucked a wayward strand of hair behind my ear before giving me a soft smile and leaving the room. I was baffled at how he’d managed to go from gripping me hard in the pool to sweet and caring in less than ten minutes. I probably would’ve been glued to my spot for a little while longer had it not been for the fact that I was freezing my ass of again.

I carefully wrung out my bikini before placing it on the towel heater like Tyler had suggested and slowly stepping into his huge shower. Steam was starting to fog up the mirrors by the time I could finally get myself to leave the comfort of the hot water hitting my skin.

Still wrapped in a fluffy towel I began wiping away at the mascara stains on my cheeks with a washcloth. The hot steam had given the supposed waterproof product its final blow and I had no desire to walk around like a panda. I tried to dry my hair with a second towel as well as possible and continued blow drying it on low afterwards. Tyler didn’t have any heat protection in his bathroom but I think I’d be even more worried if he’d actually had some. By the time I was finished my bikini was thankfully pretty much dry.

The hoodie he’d given me reached over my ass and the sleeves were way too long, once again reminding me of our size difference. It had his name on it and smelled like a mix of the shampoo that I’d just used, his cologne that I’d gotten a whiff of over the past few days, and something that I imagined was just Tyler. I absolutely loved it.

Rolling up the sleeves I tried to go for a cute oversized look, instead of looking like a homeless person and when I was finally happy with the outcome I threw the towels in the hamper and switched off all the lights on my way out.

Standing in the backyard I realized that most people had left already, only those who I’d gotten to know as Tyler’s closer friends and teammates remained spread out over the patio. I found Tyler deep in conversation with Jamie, Katie nowhere near him. They appeared to have a serious talk and I didn’t want to interrupt, so I started looking for Katie instead.

“There you are!”, she exclaimed when I’d finally spotted her among some other girls. Some I had played today, others were now staring over at my seat curiously.

“So you’re Seg’s new girlfriend?”, one of them asked and I wanted to give her an incredulous look before remembering the scene Tyler and I had pulled in the pool. To an outsider it might have looked that way, hell even to yourself as an insider it might have looked that way.

“No I’m not, we actually just met two days ago”, I responded and now most of the girls were looking at you in shock.

“You met him two days ago and he invited you to a party?!”, one of them asked. I were pretty sure she was the girlfriend of another hockey player but today had been a whirlwind of names and faces and the alcohol hadn’t helped much either.

“As far as I’ve seen there are lots of people at his parties that he doesn’t know too well”, I defended myself, remembering how he’d practically ignored half of the people that were on his property.

“Yeah but they usually just tag along without an invitation and Tyler doesn’t bother with them”, Katie explained friendly. Tyler had more than bothered with me today.

“Oh, well we figured out that we were practically neighbors and he was also probably trying to make up for the fact that Gerry had chewed my 200$ slides, of course he’d go straight for designer”, I explained sighing.

The last part made everyone laugh and soon our little group was having an animated discussion on designer versus off-the-rack. I’d never really cared either way, I just bought what I liked. I had dresses from H&M or Macy’s hanging right next to gowns that were worth a couple of grand and no name purses leaning on Hermès.

“What are you girls cackling over?”, Jamie asked and I jumped in my seat, not realizing that the two of them were now standing literally right behind me.

“We want to get the fireplace started, are you ready?”, Tyler asked in the direction of everyone while only looking at me. I nodded along with everyone else and gladly took his hand so he could pull me up to my feet. He didn’t let go though, instead pulling me closer to him.

“I’m gonna go grab a drink for me, do you want something as well?”, he asked, again brushing some loose strands out of my face. I was tempted to lean into his touch but stopped myself at the last moment. I seriously needed to get a grip.

“Yeah sure, but I don’t know if I’m in the mood for any more liquor and don’t even get me started on your disgusting American beer”, I teased smiling up to him.

“You weren’t complaining earlier”, he smirked and led me to his kitchen. That’s because I was focused on you instead.

“I didn’t really have a choice because it’s kind of hard to play beer pong with anything else, that would defeat the purpose of the sport.”

He laughed and held up his hands in defeat before saying: “Alright alright I give in, even I know that American beer is inferior, especially compared to what you guys drink in Europe. I was actually planning on drinking some wine though, do you want a glass as well?”

“You’re a wine guy?”, I exclaimed surprised. “Well I never would’ve guessed that.”

Tyler threw his had over his heart in mock offense before walking to a door and showing me his fully stocked wine cabinet so I could get a good look at it. This wasn’t ‘wine guy’ level anymore, Tyler was a connoisseur and at first it didn’t fit with the way he carried himself at all, but now that I thought about it, it made perfect sense. He loved golf for crying out loud.

Tyler reached up to a bottle of red on the upper shelves and as I knew my way around a wine cellar as well, I was sure that he’d pulled out an expensive bottle. He grabbed two stemmed glasses and I hopped on the counter, watching him expertly pour the wine.

“This is my favorite, so you’re entitled to feel special because I’m sharing it with you”, he said with a wink before handing me the bottle so I could get a look at it and then one of the glasses when I was done.

“To being a great team”, I smiled, thinking back to all the fun I’d had with him in just three days. I never would have thought that I could connect to someone so deep in such a time span, yet here we were drinking wine in his kitchen.

“To us then”, he responded softly and we clinked our glasses before taking the first sip. It had a sweet and heavy taste, perfect for slow end-of-summer evenings like the one we had ahead of us. This wine was the definition of romance, because it somehow left the lingering feeling of cuddling under a warm and heavy blanket and smiling at each other the way Tyler and I were right now. It was meant to be shared and cherished in company.

“Usually I prefer a lighter white, but I think you’ve managed to convince me with this one”, I smiled down at him from my vantage point and took another small sip before hopping down the counter.

“Come on, let’s see if Jamie is actually capable of starting a fire by himself”, Tyler joked and moved both his glass and the bottle to his right hand so he could hold out the left one to me. Without hesitation I placed my hand in his, reveling in the way his big hand completely encased mine.

I wouldn’t usually consider myself a physical person, but for some reason I found yourself craving his fingers on my skin now whenever possible. It had started during the second game of beer pong, his hand on my lower back and him leaning down to whisper soft encouragement in my ear. At first it had made it difficult to concentrate, the way he rubbed small circles on my skin distracting in the best way but as soon as I let myself relax into his touch, it was very calming.

After that I couldn’t help placing your hands on his shoulders when it was his turn or wrapping my fingers around his biceps in support. His skin was so soft and touching him quickly became my addiction, the way I was pressed against him in the pool not helping at all.

Jamie had indeed managed to start a fire already and I looked around the group of maybe ten that was now lounging on the chairs and sofas surrounding the fireplace. There wasn’t really that much space left in the circle so when Tyler sat own in a loveseat, he pulled me on top of him so I could sit in his lap sideways. I leaned against his shoulder and he wrapped his hands around me before joining the conversation.

I hadn’t felt this relaxed in so long, laughing along with everyone and the heat from Tyler’s body keeping you warm. The girls were now telling stories of the worst things fans had said to them and I was horrified at what some of them had to hear. They laughed it off mostly, but I still wondered deep down how they managed to face so much shit simply because they were in love with a guy and not let it get to them. Would I be able to do the same? I had always been very independent but my entire job and therefore most of my life relied on the approval from others. I’d taken some public hits in my late teens and I still remembered how I woke up drenched in sweat most nights during those times.

Tyler kept refilling our glasses and at one point I just leaned my head back on his shoulders, looking up at the night sky.

“Are you tired?”, he murmured softly against me, but I shook my head.

“No not yet, I’m trying to see the stars but city lights are too bright.”

“I know this spot a bit away from here where you can see them really well, I’ll take you if you want”, he responded, shifting nervously and again surprising me with the sweetness of his offer. It was as if there’d been a switch flipped, gone was the cocky guy playing beer pong, a sweet and considerate but nervous Tyler in his stead. His touch had changed from demanding to considerate, now softly stroking my back.

By the time we’d finished the bottle, only Jamie and Katie were left with us and even they said their goodbyes. I had given Katie my number earlier and she promised to text me so we could figure out a time to meet for lunch soon.

I was tempted to just stay in Tyler’s arms all night, even with more seats opening up he had made no move to get me off his lap, but I knew that that would not be the best idea.

“I should probably go”, I murmured against his neck, still wrapped tightly around him. I felt him take a deep breath but he didn’t disagree.

“I’ll walk you”, he said to my surprise.

“You don’t have to, it’s literally only five minutes and I bet you’re just as tired as I am”, I tried to refuse his offer while getting up.

“I know it’s only five minutes, therefore you’re not keeping me up and you have no excuse to not let me”, he insisted and I laughed at him pouting before giving in. I could never say no to the look he was giving me at this moment.

With his hand around my shoulder and mine wrapped around his torso we slowly made our way to my house, softly swaying because of all the alcohol we’d consumed.

“Did I tell you that you look great in my clothes yet?”, Tyler asked and let go of my shoulder so he could slowly spin me around. I shook my head, beaming with happiness. I never wanted this feeling, this glorious giddy feeling in my chest that seemed to light up my heart, to stop. I was convinced he’d kiss me as we stood there in the light of a street lantern and I’d let him, but instead he took a step back and laced his fingers through mine, slowly pulling me towards my driveway.

“Text me when you’re back home”, I said as we stood in my doorway.

“Hey that’s what I’m supposed to say”

“Just do it”, you sighed in mock exasperation before leaning up on your tippy toes to give him a soft kiss on the cheek.

“Goodnight Tyler”

“Goodnight Liv, sleep tight”

Part Three here