#and all day i was tending to students and their essay submissions and an evebt they had to host and their mental health and im so proud | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

lupismaris · 2 years

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Spent the entire day, work and otherwise, playing caretaker- adviser, nanny, big brother, big sister, valet, maid, therapist, devoted friend giving you away to something better- please fuck all i want is for someone to stop me and return the favor

#i have been hyperaware of the impending shut down all day feeling it building in stages to the point i wasnt sure i could go to #my very close work friend's goodbye happy hour this evening but my other work friends insisted and so i medicated and went #and i held it together so well right till the end when we said goodbye and then i just started breaking #and all day i was tending to students and their essay submissions and an evebt they had to host and their mental health and im so proud #they trust me to be that person i am so fuckin proud that i can be an older sibling to them because i never had that #but i feel so deeply alone right now and so impossibly tired because while i have people who love me they're far away #and this isnt the sort of thing soothed and sorted with typeface pne a screen at least not that ive found #so im just stuck burning myself into the ground

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