#and hierarchy factors so much into my view of relatuonships | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

discountdyke · 11 months

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and it breaks my heart bc I'm never going to be the exception, I'm never going to be good enough or charming or funny or talented enough to make someone else care about me like that. not when they're just putting up with me bc of a mutual friend. it's frustrating. I hate it. I want so badly to destroy any connection I have that isn't Safe, that isn't Whole, but I can't, because that's "crazy behavrior". I'd rather be lonely instead

#talking tag #it drives me nuts when ppl think they're friends with someone bc they talked once #like that's just not true???#and hierarchy factors so much into my view of relatuonships #everyone has people they care most and least about #how can I call someone a friend when I am not the closest person to them? when so many other ppl rank above me?#I wish I never knew anything about anyone bc it hurts so bad to know things that no one would ever Tell you #I just feel so fucking broken and lonely and I feel even more so when I'm reminded that I'm crazy for feeling this way #I just wish there were ppl out there who actually Wanted to get to know me.#but there isn't. the only ppl who do already know me

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