#and if it's true for her imagine anyone or anything smaller and less media visible

[justaholeinmysoul]

Chronically online also means that something is viral and you don't have no fucking clue because often in real life no one knows wtf they're talking about

[assim-eu-sou]

me eyeing all my blorbos like "Fine! I'll do it* myself!"

*give them scoliosis because the representation? not there

Anyway, I'm debating which of my girls would be the best one to headcanon as having scoliosis, and I have options.

Ámbar Smith

At the start of the show, Ámbar is old enough to have had spinal fusion surgery already, which is why the visible asymmetries associated with the condition (traits I unfortunately possess, as for better or for worse, I have not been fused [yet]) wouldn't be present. Ideally, you would see the spinal fusion scar when she wears anything that shows her back, but I can use my imagination there. I’ve seen kids as young as 12 can having fusions, so to best accommodate the timeline (for reasons you’ll see later), I’ll say that’s when she had her surgery. She could have also been a candidate for VBT (tethering) which is a less invasive surgery that allows for more flexibility, but assuming she had a fusion, I would say she was only fused in the thoracic (upper) region, which leaves more flexibility. I have a thoracic and lumbar (lower spine) curve, but the lower curve is smaller. Many people only have one or the other.

In the show, Ámbar talks about having headaches and feeling bad as excuses to avoid further engagement with Sharon, but why not make that true? Even though spinal fusion creates a straighter spine, people with fused spines are still considered as having scoliosis and will often continue to have pain (and sometimes even new problems) for the rest of their lives. The compression of nerves and muscle tension caused by the condition can easily cause headaches and general chronic pain.

Ámbar's propensity for putting on a mask to hide her true self and emotions fits in extremely well here, as she probably tried as hard as she could to avoid people finding out about her condition because she wanted to be perceived as perfect. When she was having (and recovering from) her fusion, she did so during school holidays, and she told anyone who asked that she was traveling. Since many of her relationships were very surface-level, no one questioned her further. Prior to surgery, I would headcanon her as having had a Rigo-Cheneau brace (newer technology she would have had to travel for to obtain), and she bought an entirely new wardrobe of clothes for the purpose of disguising it as well as possible. (I tried very hard to hide my own Boston brace, and for me that meant larger t-shirts and vests or jackets always. Ámbar finds a way to accomplish this more fashionably). She won't let anyone hug her because she's afraid that they will feel the brace, which is why she still has discomfort with physical touch from some people in the time we see her in the show. If anyone ever looked at her for too long, she'd give them her trademark murderous stare. She would have a brace for a very short amount of time because her condition progressed quickly and was detected late. All of this would be pre-canon, but the emotional impacts of having worn a brace as mentioned shape her in canon.

She had to take time off skating due to the surgery, which makes her skills that much more impressive. While she has always been a perfectionist, she pushes herself even harder due to the self-esteem and body image issues she has as a result of the condition. She would never want people to think of her as weak, so she hides her pain and comes home exhausted as a result.

The potential of Simón being a caring boyfriend in this scenario is so *chef's kiss*. He helps her feel more confident about her scar and takes care of her on the days that the pain is especially bad. He helps her open up about it to the Roller kids.

Ok, all those reasons have me feeling like I don't even need to bother with exploring other options. Lowkey wanna write a fic informed by this AU/headcanon but. We'll see.

Anyway, I wish I didn't have to do this and we could have more characters with disabilities in media, but until then: assigned curvy spine by Lauren.