#and im not even close to getting ahete i want to be
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genuinely the worst part of this is that i cant even Ask for help.
#no i dont wanna get better#not in an edgy way of bc i really do!#but bc no professionals will help me?????#ive had 3 therapists in the last 2yrs delcine helping me vx im not underweight or severe enough#(nvm that i was Severely Relapsing and Sick during Sept-nov of last uear and was still declined!)#like . o literally hVe to do this on my own#bc o cant asl my fucking gf or my irls fo hold my hand and coddle me through this !!!!!!!!!#but imgenuonely tired of fighting mh ed thoughts on my ownnnow#like 2yrs of this shit#and im not even close to getting ahete i want to be#all igd done is gain weighy and limited.my relapsesnout of Fear that im gonna die bc i have symptoms of Shit Gone Wrong Internslly#so otd whatever now at tbis point#like i just wajt Proper Help and i cant even get it :(#storynod my fuckijgnlifeni thibk
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