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atiny-ahgase · 4 years

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A Promise And A Stray Pup (Part 1 of 2?)

Title: A Promise And A Stray Pup

Chapter 1: Pinky Promise

Author’s Note: Hi hi, it’s Gabby here. Hope that you all are doing well. I thought about the idea for this fic for a really long time so I hope that my planning and attention to detail shines through.

Disclaimer: This fic starts off with a flashback to when Y/n was really young, nothing weird or bad happens but I just wanted to put this out there in case it makes anyone uncomfortable. It’s just a simple fic about a kid and a stray dog.

Summary: Y/n returns home in search of a hybrid friend that she had left oh so long ago. Will she be able to help him? Did their friendship withstand the hands of time or did it crumble from the pressure?

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Pairing: Hybrid Yunho x Gender Neutral Reader

Word Count: 6.4 k (Or something like that...)

Genre: Hybrid au, Fluff

Contains: Hybrid Yunho, Gender Neutral Reader, Fluff, Slight Angst, Suggestive, Mentions a dead relative

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Tagging: @sangie-baby

Props to @yungidreamer for helping me out with proof reading and reviewing. Thank you for making sense out of my nonsense lol.

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“Mom I don’t wanna go to big kid school,” you whined as you walked alongside your mother, your rubber boots splashing in the puddles beneath you. It had been pouring rain but your mother was determined to get you to school as it was your first day. You on the other hand were less than thrilled to be there. You wanted nothing more than to sleep in, wake up late and play with your toys every day. But apparently “big kids” had to go to school and learn things. Holding onto her hand helped you keep up with her fast pace until you arrived at the school that you would be attending. You didn’t know what jail looked like but if you had to imagine it in your 6-year-old brain, this would be it. You squeezed your mother’s hand even tighter. She couldn’t just leave you here, could she? Your question was later answered when an adult who you assumed to be your teacher swept you away from your mother’s grasp. You hated it here.

You had been homeschooled till now and by homeschooled you meant that you stayed at home and learned your Alphabet with your dad. But after your dad had passed there was no one to supervise you at home since your mom had to work extremely long hours just to make ends meet, hence how you ended up here. You were grumpy for the entire day, ensuring that your teacher knew that you didn’t want to be there. Even at 6 years old you were a force to be reckoned with, you were stubborn and not afraid to show it.

Thankfully the day flew by and before you knew it, it was time to head home. Finally, you’d be able to leave this hell and retreat into the four walls of your comfortable home. Your mother had contacted the school beforehand informing them that she’d be running a little late. You knew that you could walk home on your own; you were incredibly independent for your age. There was this one time where you had walked home from the park after being separated from your parents. You still remembered the look on their faces when they found you seated on the wooden rocking chair in the front porch, your little legs not even touching the ground as you waited for them. Even after all of that she still said that you couldn't walk home on your own; something about bad men stealing children or something like that. So you had to stay in school until your mother came to pick you up. Until then you just walked along the inside of your school fence, hand brushing against the cold metal.

Your fingers bumped over the wires as you walked, aimlessly running your hand over the chain-link fence. You followed the fence bordering the school which eventually lead you to the back of the school yard. There was a dark and dismal alley behind the school, it seemed to be the place where the neighbourhood gathered their garbage to be later collected by the garbage trucks. Raising your head you saw a pile of clothes pressed up against the cold concrete wall. Not paying it any mind to it you continued walking until you noticed the pile slightly moving. Looking closer you realized that what had originally appeared to be a lump of discarded clothing was actually a boy, he didn’t seem to be that much older than you but a hood concealed most of his face. You stared at him for quite some time, trying to understand what was going on, did he not have school? Mom said that all big kids had to go to school. Why wasn’t he in school?

Your hands grasped onto the metal wiring of the fence as you peered at him, your mother had always said that it was rude to stare but you couldn’t help it, he was so fascinating. Without warning his head shot up, eyes immediately finding yours. You jumped back in shock, your heart racing in your chest as you fell unto the floor, your hands grazing upon the heated asphalt. He seemed to be just as surprised as you were, his eyes blown out in surprise as he looked at you. There you stayed staring at him from your spot on the floor, his head slightly tilted as he crawled a little closer to the fence, seemingly examining you. Now that he was no longer masked by the shadow of the alley wall you could see his face more clearly. He had bright yellow eyes along with a warm brown puff of hair on his head. Under his hood, you could clearly see the indent of two ears protruding through. He was a hybrid. Your mother had told you about hybrids before, she said that they were scary individuals that didn’t deserve to be treated as humans, she said that they were bad and dangerous and you should stay away from them.

But he didn’t look dangerous nor scary at all, he looked...startled. You stood up from the floor taking a tentative step towards him. With every step that you took, he stepped backwards, eyes never once leaving yours. “Ahchoo”, you heard him sneeze in front of you. “Bless you,” you laughed before smiling brightly at him. There was no response, he just looked at you with the same shocked expression that he had before. “Maybe he was just shy,” you thought. “Do you like chocolate?” you asked excitedly while bouncing in place. Surely he did, everyone did. You placed your lunch kit on the floor before rummaging through it to find your chocolate chip cookies. Finding the bag you attempted to push it through the holes of the fence only to realize that the bag was too big. You frowned slightly, saddened by the fact that you couldn’t share your cookies with him. You stood for a moment pondering about what to do before a light bulb came up in your head.

Grasping the pack you opened the top before taking a cookie in your tiny hands and sliding them through the fence, offering the snack to the boy. He looked at it for a moment before grabbing it from your hand and consuming it in one bite. “He must be really hungry,” you deduced. You took another cookie from the bag giving it to him and watching him eat cookie after cookie. “I’m sorry, it’s all finished. I’ll be sure to bring more tomorrow okay?” you said to him; expecting a reply you looked at him but he just ran off. You looked into the alley as he sped away, blending into the darkness. “He seems fun,” you thought as you smiled widely.

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“Mom may I please have an extra bag of cookies today?” you asked your mother as you ate your breakfast.

“You know that you can’t eat too much sweet hun,” she stated while packing your lunch kit.

“It’s not for me. I made a new friend so I wanted to give one to him,” you replied while smiling brightly at her.

“Oh well that’s great sweetie,” she stated while finding another bag of cookies to place into your kit “, What’s his name?”

“I’m not sure; he’s really shy,” you replied, a hint of sadness clearly in your voice as you looked down at your plate of scrambled eggs.

“Don’t worry sweetie, I’m sure that he’ll love the cookies,” she smiled at you before patting your head.

Your mother dropped you off at the school, waving you goodbye as you walked into the building. The day was a little more manageable but maybe that was because you were so excited for school to be over so you could see your new friend again. Well, at least the person that you wanted to be your new friend...if he wanted you to be. The bell rang through the hallways of the school and you found yourself running to the spot where you had first seen the little hybrid boy. Stopping at where you felt was the same spot, you looked into the shadows of the alley; your face sinking when you didn’t see him. You dropped your bags on the warm asphalt and stooped down; waiting for him. “Maybe he was late,” you thought while aimlessly playing with your nails. You felt like you were there for hours but in reality, it was probably only a few minutes.

“H-hi,” you heard a voice speak from in front of you, you didn’t jump or even flinch at all; it didn’t seem the least bit threatening. Looking up from your spot on the floor you notice the hybrid boy from yesterday. You smiled brightly at him before going into your bag to retrieve the bag of cookies. You both stayed silent as he ate. You thought that maybe he’d open up a little today but you were wrong, he didn’t even tell you his name.

This cookie exchange carried on for the duration of the school term and you still didn’t know anything about him. But that didn’t deter you one bit. Even though he had never really said anything with his words you felt as though you told you so much with his eyes. They weren’t the typical brown, blue, grey or any of the usual colours that you noticed the other students in the school had. His eyes were a bright yellow, they shone like the sun, radiating warmth straight into your little heart. And they spoke straight to your soul, thanking you for being with him, for staying with him. Thanking you for being there.

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You wiped your tired eyes as you trudged through the bleak school halls, heading to your classroom. Your body felt drained from all of the tears you had shed the previous day . After arriving home from school, your mother had informed you that she had just gotten a new job which meant that you had to move away. She said that it was really far and that you’d have to change schools.

If you had gotten this information at the beginning of the term your little heart would have been elated; overjoyed that you’d be leaving the confines of these bleak school walls, but that wasn’t the case. What would happen to the little hybrid boy that you had befriended? How would you both eat cookies together if you left? The very thought of leaving him left an aching feeling in your chest, it felt as though your soul was being ripped out of your body.

The immense feeling of sorrow which washed over you brought with it a flood of tears which you could not control. The salty liquid filled your eyes before cascading off of your cheeks and dampening the plush rug beneath your feet. It was as though the floodgates had opened as water rushed through without any indication of stopping until the river was drained of every last drop of water, your body releasing every last tear that it could muster up. Every comforting word that your mother had attempted to provide being drowned out by your wails of sadness. The next morning you woke up to the bright morning sun shining through your window, casting a golden glow across everything that it touched. Your mother had tucked you in, wrapping your body in your woolen blanket after finding you asleep on the couch.

Walking into class you took your seat and waited for your teacher to begin their lesson, their voice drifting further and further away until you couldn’t hear it at all, your own thoughts drowning out the world around you. Your mind was filled with so many other things, so many different emotions. You didn’t have space to even think about what was going on around you, all you could think about was him.

Opening your sketchbook you began to aimlessly doodle, in an attempt to distract yourself from the aching feeling that had never left your chest. Everything that you saw, everything that you did, reminded you of him. The sunflowers that you had mindlessly scribbled were his eyes, the faded black of the chalkboard; his washed-out jeans, even the deafening silence of during naptime reminding you of the comfortable silence that you both had shared so many times before. You wished that you had started attending public school a little earlier, then maybe you could have held onto him a little longer, make him smile a little brighter.

Your teacher had decided for the entire class to do a craft that day, sort of like a going-away present. So, all of the students made 2 friendship bracelets, one for themselves and one for their friend. You spent the entirety of your evening constructing 2 little bracelets each of different colours. Crafts have always been one of your favourite things, what could be more fulfilling than having an idea and bringing it to life? Of course, this activity would serve as a great distraction from the aching feeling which inhabited your heart.

After completing your bracelets you gently placed them on the table in front of you; the silver pendants glistening in the afternoon sun. “Oh these are lovely Y/n,” your teacher commented from beside you “, Are those your favourite colours?” Looking down you admired the bright blue and yellow bands of the individual bracelets. “Umm no,” you replied in an almost puzzled tone. You didn’t really have a reason for choosing those colours, they just sort of came to you. “Well maybe they remind you of something that makes you happy,” she smiled before slightly ruffling your hair. Your teacher had expected you to give your bracelet to someone from your class but you never did. You held on to that bright yellow bracelet for the rest of the day.

When the class had finally ended you walked over to your usual spot for the last time, your feet dragging on the asphalt as you slowly made your way to the back of the school. He was already there, leaned up against the wall; his grey oversized hoodie and black pants hanging off of his slightly smaller frame. You had never seen him in anything else and at first, you would often question it but now it gave you some sort of comfort; it was your constant in this ever-changing world. He smiled as he saw you approaching, his bright eyes lighting up as his tail wagged energetically. You loved how even when he said nothing you could still see his true emotions, they shone through like sunbeams through a glass window. He didn’t have to say anything to you, you knew that he was happy to see you.

“That’s okay,” he said; your head shooting up at the sound of his voice, that was the most words that he had ever said to you. “We can eat them next time right Y/n”, he continued. Maybe he knew that something bad had happened and this was his way of trying to cheer you up. You knew that he meant well when he said “next time” but in your book, there was no next time because you were moving soon. “Momma said that we’re moving away so we can’t eat cookies together anymore,” said as your voice trembled. You tried your best to hold in your tears but you were really going to miss him, there was just something about him that you really loved, you loved spending time with him.

With everything that had happened yesterday you had forgotten to bring him cookies, hopefully, he wouldn’t be mad. You hurried to meet him, your little feet scurrying to the fence. You were now facing him, your head tilted up slightly to look him in the eye. They reminded you of a Sunflower field, bold, bright and beautiful; you could get lost in them for hours, you were going to miss that. His head tilted slightly as he pushed his hand through one of the holes in the fence and patting your head; probably sensing your melancholy mood. Clearing your throat you opened your mouth to speak.

“I forgot the cookies today. Sorry,” you stated before looking down at your feet; you couldn’t bear to see sadness form in his eyes. You both couldn’t even eat cookies together for the last time and that was your fault, too. Today was the last day that you were going to be seeing him and you couldn’t even share that together. Your stomach churned at the feeling of disappointment that welled up inside of you. The tears in your eyes already prepared to break through your calm exterior.

“We’ll see each other again though right?” he inquired, his ears sitting flat against his head, his cheerful voice in direct contrast to his saddened appearance; you wanted nothing more than to hold him in your arms and give him a big hug. But you were separated by the fence, this physical barrier blocking out the emotions that you both had felt. “Yeah...I’ll come back, I promise,” you said while wiping away the tears which had managed to escape from your eyes. “I don’t know when I’ll be back but I will come back okay, um,” you began but he still hadn’t told you his name. “Yunho,” he said, his yellow eyes searching yours for any sigh of deceit. “I’ll wait for you forever okay Y/n, pinky promise,” he said as he held out his pinky finger to you. You couldn’t help but smile at the act, this was the most sacred of promises, but you knew that you’d keep it with all of your heart. You crossed your significantly smaller pinky with his own, promising to return to him someday.

“Oh. I made you something,” you chimed in; just remembering about your friendship bracelets. Pulling away you dig into your bag in search of the yellow sunflower friendship bracelet you had made in class. Finally finding it you pulled it out of your bag and showed it to him. “It’s yellow just like your eyes,” you said with a big smile plastered across your face. His expression changed from one of confusion to pure joy, as his face broke into a bright smile to match yours. Placing your hands through the fence you secured the bracelet to his wrist before placing your blue iris bracelet. “These are a sign of our friendship okay? So no matter how far away we are from each other we will always be bonded by these bracelets,” you explained while looking into his big bright yellow eyes.

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“Is this the last box?” your mom asked as you loaded the moving truck. “Yeah that’s the last of it,” you replied while drying your sweaty palms off on your jeans. She had never understood why you wanted to return to your old home for university. It wasn’t like you had that many memories there anyway, you moved away when you were six. This was your new home, filled with the friends that you had acquired for the past 12 years. And of course, you would miss them but you had all of their numbers and you could drive now, the city is only a few hours away so you knew that you’d see them again. You had to go back, you had made a promise and you were determined to keep it. You wanted to keep it, you wanted to see him again, your first-ever real friend.

A lot has changed in the past 12 years. Hybrids have become more accepted by the overall community, of course, there are people who still hold a negative prejudice towards them but those people are few in numbers and far apart. Even your mother had changed her outlook on hybrids which you were so incredibly grateful for. “I’ll come to visit you when I can okay mom; so try not to get too lonely,” you smiled at her before pulling her into a hug. “The house is gonna be quiet without you Luv,” she replied while hugging you tightly. You said your final goodbyes to your friends before hopping into your car. One of your friend’s parents actually owned the moving company so his brother volunteered to drive the van and help you move-in some of the heavier boxes. You were grateful that he did because the only form of exercise that you partook in was jumping to conclusions; that didn’t grant you with the muscle mass that was required for this job.

The drive back home, well to your previous home that is, was pretty peaceful. You broke the silence by listening to some of your favourite songs until you arrived. With the distraction of music, the drive went by incredibly fast. You were now placing all of your boxes into your apartment. There were a lot of boxes; who knew that you had so much stuff, but thankfully you had some help so it didn’t take you too long.

“Thanks for all of the help,” you said, “I don’t think that I could have done all of this without you”.

“It’s cool and good luck at university,” he replied. “Don’t forget to make good choices,” he continued while pointing a joking finger at you. You laughed along with him before waving him goodbye.

“Now I just have all of these boxes to sort out and I’ll be done,” you thought. Easier said than done. You practically spent the entire day organizing your stuff but at least now you could sleep in tomorrow. School didn’t start for another week, but you had moved in early to make sure that everything was sorted out. At least that was the excuse that you used, in reality, you just wanted some extra time to search for Yunho.

However, that task was easier said than done. You had not even the slightest idea of where to look; you didn’t know his last name, address, phone number, nothing. How on earth were you supposed to find him? Where were you even supposed to start looking? You opted to go to the local university with the hope that maybe he would be a student there but that possibility was highly unlikely. You didn't realize back then but as you grew older you finally understood why Yunho was always in that alleyway, he was abandoned. You were so nieve to the struggles that hybrids had to face on a daily basis. It was extremely difficult to parent hybrids, they had to go to separate schools than others; almost all of the schools were private schools, so if you couldn't afford it your child just wouldn't be educated. This law has since been revoked due to its unfair nature, it made education unreachable for most hybrids who could rarely afford such luxuries. You were just sorry that those changes did not happen earlier, maybe things would have been different.

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Although you had planned to sleep in, your stomach had other plans. Dragging yourself out of bed you went to the kitchen to get a bowl of cereal while mentally reminding yourself to go shopping later that day. Most of your morning was occupied by organizing school stuff on your laptop to ensure that everything was finalized. It was now around lunchtime and your stomach once again reminded you that you had not bought any groceries yet. Releasing a loud sigh you grabbed your wallet and keys before heading out the front door. You hopped into your car searching for a grocery store of any kind. The place looked so different from the way that you remembered it, new buildings had replaced the old ones and so many of the places which you had enjoyed going to as a child had been closed down. “I wonder where else has been closed down?” you wondered as you took a left on a rather familiar road.

Looking through your car window you try to spot your old school, remembering the pale green walls and rusty fence which bordered it. Your facial expression sinking as you soon realized that it had gotten closed down. In its wake was a large grocery store and parking lot. You couldn't hide the disappointment on your face as you swung into the parking lot. Although you hadn’t spent very long there it held some of your sweetest memories, your memories with Yunho. Walking into the store you were immediately hit with the savoury smell of freshly baked bread. Grabbing a shopping cart you walked through the aisles collecting everything that you needed which was literally everything because this morning you had dry cereal since you hadn’t even bought milk yet.

You were almost finished with your grocery trip, only needing a few more items. Walking down the last aisle you realized that you didn't have any paper towels. Looking through the aisle you released a loud sigh as you noticed the paper towels on the top shelf. So what, do short people not use paper towels in this town? Standing on the tip of your toes you tried your best to reach them but it was to no avail, your fingertips couldn't even touch the plastic packaging. You tried again jumping slightly in an attempt to at least knock it down but still nothing.

“Do you need some help,” you heard a voice giggle from behind you.

“I don't think that it's good customer service to laugh at your customers,” you chuckled before turning around.

You were immediately greeted by two bright yellow orbs; he was a hybrid. Before you could say anything further he stretched above you, effortlessly retrieving the paper towels for you. You retreated slightly, back hitting the edge of the shelf, you felt shy due to your close proximity. You noticed a sunflower pendant hanging around his neck, the sight of which tugging at some distant memory in your mind.

“One pack of paper towels for the lovely customer,” he spoke, his voice as sweet as honey, warmth dripping off of every word that he said.

“Thank you,” you replied, blushing slightly at his compliment. Taking them from his grasp your fingertips lightly brushing against his ownYour eyes flicked to his chest, expecting to find a name tag, but to your surprise, you found nothing there.

“Yunho,” he said, his words catching you off guard.

“Yunho? It couldn’t possibly be that easy,” you thought, a shocked look covering your face as you stood frozen, staring.

“Did you need anything else Luv?” he inquired, his head tilted to the side as his ears twitched in an inquisitive nature.

How could he stand at what? 6 feet and still look like an absolute baby; a puppy. You shook your head in an attempt to get rid of your initial shock. You smiled brightly at him, your cheeks slightly pained due to the intensity of your smile, you couldn't help it; you had honestly missed him so much.

“And here I thought that I needed to bring you cookies for you to tell me your name,” you joked, a slight smirk on your face. Now it was time for him to be shocked. You couldn't help the chuckle that escaped your lips, his facial expression was hilarious. Was that what you looked like a few moments ago?

You opened your mouth to speak again but this action became futile as you felt the air burst from your lungs as Yunho engulfed you into a hug. His back slightly hunched as he rested his head on your shoulder, nuzzling his nose against your neck. “Twelve years later and you're still a puppy huh?” you stated while tangling your hands in his hazel brown hair.

“You came back,” you heard him state; his voice sounding slightly broken as his muffled sound reached your ears. “I told you I would,” you replied before pulling away from him, your eyes immediately meeting his. They had somehow seemed to brighten throughout the years, the yellow hue seemed almost blinding.

“People lie. I thought that you were another one,” he confessed, his eyes shooting to the floor, “No one had ever really come back for me.” You couldn’t stop the shattering feeling from flooding your heart, your tightening as you looked at his golden eyes; so bright despite everything that he’d been through.

He didn't deserve that, no one deserved that; being discarded because of something that you couldn't even control. Being deceived as they waited hopefully. What kind of person would allow such a sweet individual to endure so much? “I came back every day because I didn't know when you'd show up and I didn’t want to keep you waiting. I tried to stay as close as I could but sometimes it was really hard. But then when the grocery franchise bought the school I couldn't really show up anymore; the construction workers kept on chasing me out,” he said while scratching the back of his neck, his tail waving frantically behind him.

“I eventually got this job with the hope that I’d be able to see you again but to tell you the truth I didn't expect you to really come back for me,” he continued.

“I missed you,” he said before smiling slightly. How could someone ever leave someone as precious as him? You'd only reunited for what 5 minutes? And you couldn't even think about leaving his side.

“How could I not come back for you? You’re such a good boy,” you said while reaching up to pet his head; heat flooded your face. What were you thinking? What if he didn't like his head being patted? He was a dog hybrid but that didn’t mean that he was a dog. You quickly pulled your hand away before attempting to apologize, but your words stuck in your throat as he gently grasped your hand. Bending slightly and placing it back on his head before looking at you hopefully. He's adorable. He's absolutely precious and you knew that he wasn't a pet but that didn't stop your brain from thinking about how badly you wanted to keep him.

“Yunho I need you to help me stack the shelves on Aisle 9 please,” you heard a voice speak from a few steps away. Looking over you noticed a short black-haired man carrying a box; he was a cat hybrid, the shape of his eyes mimicking that of a cat’s as his tail hung effortlessly behind him. I thought that cats and dogs didn't get along. “I’ll be right there Young-ah,” Yunho replied.

“Okay just hurry up, I’m not missing my lunch break because you decided to flirt with the customers,” he replied; a mischievous smirk on his face. “It’s not like that,” Yunho began as the male began to walk away; from your spot near the shelf you had the perfect view of the blush that ever so slightly crept upon his face, “they’re an old friend”.

“When do you get off work,” you asked.

“Oh..um around 6 I think,” Yunho replied, his voice laced with light uncertainty as he glanced at you.

“Okay well then I’ll pick you up at 6,” you chimed, “oh and don't have too many snacks. I'll make dinner.”

“How many cookies am I allowed to eat?” he playfully inquired while slowly exiting the aisle. “None! I'm the only one allowed to give you cookies,” you playfully replied while stomping your feet on the ground and crossing your arms. Yunho had said something back but he was too far for you to hear it properly. It was so strange; he was the same boy that you remembered from 12 years ago while simultaneously being someone completely new. You knew one thing for sure; you love that you had for him so many years ago still remained.

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“This tastes amazing Y/n!” Yunho basically yelled from across the table. You were never really one for extravagance nor were you in the habit of keeping up appearances. You had prepared burgers for dinner and by the glistening smile that plastered Yunho’s face that he enjoyed it. “Don't talk with your mouth full Yun, you'll choke,” you scolded him before reaching over to the table to whip the sauce off of the corner of his lip. He may be a dog hybrid but he eats like a pig. “Sorry,” he replied. “What did I just tell you?” you jokily asked. After you both ate Yunho insisted on helping you with the dishes before you both sat on the couch talking about nothing at all really.

“So what has Y/n been up to these days?” Yunho enquired from his spot on the couch; which was basically your lap because that was where he rested his head while you gently ran your fingers through his hair. You responded to his question; telling him about your friends back home, the major you were going to be studying in university and all of the little things you like to do in your free time.

“My brother goes to that school,” he stated rather consistently. Brother? He has a brother?

“Oh, I didn't know you had a brother,” you replied to his rather shocking statement.

“Well, he isn't my real brother but that doesn't really matter much. A few years after you left I got caught by the Hybrid Division of Animal Control, that was where his dad found me. They aren't hybrids but you're really great people, he's a few years older than I am so he treats me like a little brother,” he stated, “it’s nice. You should meet him some time”. You hummed at his statement as your hand continued to aimlessly play in his hair.

You had no idea when you had fallen asleep but you were awakened by the sun shining through your bedroom windows. Releasing a loud groan you mentally punched yourself in the face for forgetting to put up curtains. Rolling out of bed you trudged your way into the living room; only for your eyes to fall on the figure of a rather comfortable sleeping hybrid. It was in moments like these that you could really see his 6-year-old self, he was rolled in a ball, mouth slightly open as he faintly snored. You tried your best to enter the kitchen as quietly as you could but he and his dumb dog hearing still heard you.

“Morning little Iris,” he sleepily said as he rubbed his tired eyes. You couldn't help but smile at his statement; 12 years and he still remembered the flower on your friendship bracelets.

“Good Morning you giant sunflower,” you replied while grabbing the carton of milk from the fridge.

“Yeah,” he replied while aimlessly playing with the sunflower pendant around his neck; it looked like it was the same one from the bracelet you had made.

“My bracelet fell apart a few years ago. Seonghwa said it was because I never took it off,” he chuckled before continuing, “I was going to make another one but it just never felt the same. Oh umm...Seonghwa is my brother by the way,” he quickly added.

You couldn't help but smile at his words; he had kept it on all this time. Where did this incredible sense of loyalty come from? “Hey Yunho, have you ever gotten tested to find out what type of hybrid you are?” you inquired.

“I’m a dog hybrid...duh,” he stated before laughing at your question.

“I mean what breed of dog Mr Know it All,” you replied while pointing a teasing finger at him.

His face looked slightly confused at your out of the blue question but he replied none the less. “No. My dad said that we didn't need to because he already had a pretty good idea. But he never told me so…” he replied before shrugging and plopping himself back down on the couch.

“Yeah, I can see that happening,” you chimed in while walking towards him to play with the tip of his ears. He welcomed the interaction; pulling you to sit on the couch with him.

“What does that even mean?” he groaned playfully while placing his head on your shoulder. His body basically engulfed your but you didn't mind it at all, you felt safe in his arms.

“Isn't it obvious?” you questioned, but when Yunho simply shook his head against your neck you realized that he was completely oblivious to his breed.

“You're a Golden retriever you dummy,” you continued before giggling slightly as his hot breath fanned your neck.

You stayed like this for a while before you decided that it was about time that you had breakfast; Yunho, however, seemed to have another plan. As you tried to get up he just gripped you tighter, sandwiching you between his body and the arm of your couch. “Yunho I need to eat,” you informed him.

“You can eat later,” he whined into your ear causing goosebumps to awaken across your body.

“Yunho,” you whimpered as he pulled you even closer to him, your body fully pressed against his own. Your arms subconsciously gripped onto the back of his t-shirt, nails slightly digging into his back. You had only just become aware of how increasingly hot you felt. Was it always that hot in your apartment or was it Yunho? Were hybrids supposed to be that warm? You weren't sure and you would have tried to ask Yunho but he was either not hearing you or completely ignoring you. You tried slightly tugging at his ears but even that seemed useless.

Since playing with his ears haven't worked you opted to target his tail next. What was the harm in that right? Using the limited mobility that you had left you placed your hand at the base of Yunho’s tail before gently tugging at it. Yunho released a muffled moan before an airy whimper, his ears slumped down against his head as he nuzzled his face deeper into your neck. You could feel his plush lips press against your pulse. “Yunho?” you calling to him one more time, your voice quivering slightly. You placed a tentative hand on his head before gently tugging at his hair. That seemed to have done it; Yunho all but flew out of your grasp. His face was flushed, breathing laboured and his pupils dilated; looking into them you could only spot the slightest hint of his yellow eyes. “Are you ok-” you began to ask before he interrupted you. “I forgot that I have an early shift today. But I’ll stop by sometime during the week okay,” he sped through his words before he practically sprinted out of your apartment.

What the hell just happened?

#ateez #ateez au #hydrid au #ateez hybrid au #ateez fanfic #ateez fanfiction #ateez hybrid #ateez hybrid fanfic #yunho #Yunho Fanfic #yunho faction #yunho hybrid #ateez fluff #ateez angst #yunho fluff #yunho angst #jeong yunho #jeong yunho fanfic

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yeochikin · 4 years

Text

cupcake. | c. san

a/n: thank you so much anon for requesting! contrary to the mingi e2l fic, this one is a tad shorter and maybe less angst??? also i’m sorry if it didn’t exceed your expectations anon though i hope you enjoyed reading this! do ignore mistakes as this has not been proofread! ✨💖

“you can't just fucking copy and paste the whole wikipedia page!” you hissed over at the male who seemed unfazed by your protests after taking a look at his part of the assignment you were partnered up with, picking at his nails boredly.

of all people in the class, your lecturer just had to pair you up with choi san.

choi fucking san.

what comes to mind whenever his name is mentioned? if anyone had heard the question, the answers would be similar.

he's the athlete, the top player in the field, the football team’s hope and pride. he is choi san who has the whole college smitten over him as soon as he entered the fields, and scream out his name whenever he grabbed the ball and made a run for it to the opponent's goal, ignoring the opposing team’s defense and strikers coming up to tackle him down to steal the ball.

not only that, he excelled in his studies, managing to be at the top of your class after every test your class would hold. a lot of people in your college wished that they had the ability to be able to balance their studies and sports at the same time. you would be lying if you denied that you didn’t wish to know his secret in time management as well because, let’s be honest, sometimes you would procrastinate your assignments and had to rush through finishing them once the deadline was near.

to anyone else in the college, choi san is everyone else's dream guy. with a single piercing gaze or a smirk being sent in their way, they are bound to stutter all over the place or would even return the smirk with a wink or flirty advances, only to have him shut them down just as soon as they tried. it was safe to say that everyone wanted to be or be with, choi san.

only if he would get his head out of his ass.

you can't help but to roll your eyes at his lack of response after you ranted at how he just slapped on wikipedia's history of how theatres started in the first place before you groaned and slammed your head on the table, not even wincing from the loud thump against the wooden furniture. You wondered if he genuinely had no idea of how to do this assignment or he was just being petty.

you would bet a whole pizza it was the latter without a heartbeat.

“why did i ever get partnered up with you?”

“the same question is in my mind, cupcake.” san spoke nonchalantly, now resting his cheek against his knuckles as he stared at the mess of hair on the table in front of him.

“call me cupcake one more time and i'll stab you with a plastic spoon.”

“sure, cupcake. very scary of you.” you merely glared at san, who was looking at you with a glint of mischief swirling in his dark irises while the corners of his lips threatened to curl in the annoyed gaze you sent him.

you don't know how you and san started to hate each other. you barely ever interacted with him at all. though you might have an idea why. you had received the highest mark in your test one time, much to your joy. you would have to admit, it was satisfying to feel the smugness in san be replaced with shock once he had heard about it. while your classmates congratulated you as the class had come to an end, san glared holes in the back of your head, labelling you as his rival instantly.

now, whenever you crossed his path, be it in the hallways or just literally everywhere on the campus grounds, he would send you a dirty look or two. at first, you felt conscious from the way he stared at you, thinking if there was something in your face or hair, or maybe your clothes? your best friend, yunho, would reassure you that there was nothing wrong with you and to not mind him as such.

easier said than done. especially when the two of you have the same class together. your annoyance grew from the way san would sit behind you and purposely kick your seat, feigning innocence when you asked what was his problem. not only that, he would also lay pranks on you, like the old whoopie cushion thing so the whole class would look at you. or how he would even throw paper balls aimed at your head while class was in session. he would even purposely put his leg out while you weren't looking to make you trip in your steps, laughing with his friends afterwards and calling you ‘miss klutz’. you were lucky that yunho was there to catch you by the arm or you would've landed on your face.

it is when you finally snapped that you literally dragged him back into class as the other students had filed out, leaving the both of you alone.

“what the hell is your problem with me?” you asked, trying to remain unaffected at the way his hard eyes stared down at you.

san feigned confusion. he might be the college’s football star, but he sure as hell sucked at acting.

“i don't know what you're talking about.” he answered plainly.

“oh? then what about the kicking on my seat? the pranks you laid? what are you, 5?” you ranted, eyebrows all furrowed, the apples of your cheeks were tinted with a faint shade of pink from the rising temperature of your body due to the anger slowly pouring out of you. clearly you didn’t want to waste your time in college dealing with such childish acts.

but the boy merely stared at your face for a few seconds once you were done, only then suddenly laughing and rubbed a hand across his face.

“something about you just irritates me to the core.” he said, causing you to feel the slight sting of his venom laced tone in your chest, swallowing thickly as you could feel the anger in you rising.

with a shove of his hands into his pockets, san smirked down at you and leaned his face close to yours with you backing away slightly from the sudden close proximity between the two of you.

“y/n l/n, you irritate me.”

those were his last words before he walked off, deliberately bumping his shoulder against yours, leaving you in the now empty classroom with fists tightly clenched to your sides and jaw clenched.

‘the feeling is mutual, choi san.’ was the last thing in your head before you blinked the angry tears away, gathering your things and quickly headed out to your next class.

and after that incident, it was no surprise that everyone felt the tension between the two of you. especially when the two of you decided to beat each other in who would do better in class, one of you would send smug smiles whenever the other had received a lower score than the other. And when your college had its annual football games every year, you would instead scream another player’s name while the others would cheer san’s name.

sometimes, one of your classes would even have an impromptu debate. that only fueled the fire between the two of you. instead of facts and refutes being argued, it would always end up with the two of you sending bickers back and forth, up to the point of being kicked out of class by your lecturer.

one of your poor lecturers must’ve had enough of the both of you not resolving whatever grudge the two of you are holding against one another that when he announced the two of you were paired up, both san and you felt like the world suddenly stopped spinning. with wide eyes, you turned to look at the boy, who was no doubt already glaring at you with his tongue poking his inner cheek.

“well, fuck you too, san.” you hissed underneath your breath, yelping as yunho nudged your side with his elbow, pouting at the way he shook his head.

“if you get kicked out one more time, i'm not gonna lend you my notes.” he said, turning his head to pay attention to the lecturer afterwards.

“jung yunho!”

so, here you are. stuck with choi san until the two of you are finished with the assignment.

the first few days of having to work on this project was only filled with the two of you sending insults to one another back and forth instead of actually working on the assignment. by the fourth day, however, you had expected san to comment on your hair or even your clothes once you arrived in the library. as much as you wanted to retaliate, you instead had to sit him down just to say that the days spent arguing with each other could be used to work on your assignment, and the two of you didn’t have that much time as it was due in five more days. though reluctant, the male released a low sigh and agreed to finally get things started.

but of course, his pettiness didn’t stop there. Hence, the reason why you are ranting to him.

“san, i’m serious, we really need to get this started.” you pinched the bridge of your nose.

“and did i not have a head start on this assignment?” said male retaliated, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

“you are unbelievable.”

“why thank you, cupcake.”

“fuck off.” you groaned and slumped against your seat.

‘this is going anywhere at all.’ you thought, a hand coming up to card your digits through your hair before you heard the clicking of keys of a keyboard from a certain raven haired male in front of you.

you had to lift your head to see what he was up to now. to your surprise, san was rapidly typing up something into his laptop, eyes all focused and teeth sometimes chewing on the soft muscle of his lower lip.

“stop gawking at me, cupcake.” he said suddenly, now casting his gaze away from the laptop’s monitor to your face, effectively making you look away, and pretended to focus on your laptop, busying yourself by focusing on your part of the assignment. much to his amusement.

taking the brief opportunity, san had his eyes on you. Something about you was intriguing to him. he had always seen you as a rival in the classes you shared, wanting to beat you in any scores. he won’t even forget the amount of times he would see you in one of his games, though you weren’t looking at him with the same excitement in your eyes as the other spectators. you were.. Intriguing.

so much, that it bothered him day and night. wondering how your reactions were always so interesting every time he pulled on your leg. he can’t get your damn face out of his head to the point he just grew irritated at it. thus, taking it out on you by doing petty things.

“stop gawking at me, san.” your voice reached his ears and managed to make him snap back into reality, rolling his eyes before looking back down at his laptop.

“whatever.” he grumbled.

and for the first time, silence hung over the two of you. the only sounds present were the clicking of keyboards, the occasional doors opening and being closed by the students either entering or leaving the library, the quiet laughs from another group of students in another table a few feet away from yours while the both of you were slowly trapped into your own worlds.

❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁

a low groan left san’s lips as he stretched his arms out back, letting out a yawn in the process to make the drowsiness he accumulated from having to work on the assignment go away, sighing as the his tense muscles loosened up from the hours of staying hunched in front of his laptop. dark pools of chocolate stared out the window, and judging by the sky had turned from a clear blue to a now orange and crimson with a few specks of pink here and there, it was already evening.

a soft snore made its way into his ears, causing the male to look over at you. It seems you had fallen asleep while working from the way your hands were somehow still on the laptop’s keyboard yet your head was rested on your left arm. some of the strands of your hair had blanketed your cheeks as your eyelids were closed shut, twitching ever so slightly. for once, your face looked as if it was at ease, a huge contrast from your daily scowls and clenched jaw every time the two of you see each other in the hallways or class.

it was when you let out a light groan that managed to make san snap out of his daze, blinking a few times as he caught himself staring at your sleeping figure. clearing his throat to hide the growing heat blooming over his cheeks, tugging the collar of his shirt slightly to let the breeze from the library’s air conditioner cool off the sudden warmth he felt creeping up his neck. he had made the conclusion that the two of you were done for the day.

the screeching noise from the legs of the chair dragging against the floor was enough to jolt you awake, immediately lifting your head, though your eyes were squinted due to heaviness of sleep still evident on your eyelids.

“good morning to you too, cupcake.” san mused, shoving his laptop into his bag.

ah, there it was. the look of distaste has appeared yet again. san couldn’t help but to snicker inwardly at the sight.

“i said don’t call me that. what time is it anyway?” you yawned, then stretching your arms out in front of you to get rid of the sore feeling on your lower back and shoulder blades.

“time for us to go is what it is.” san answered plainly, smirking at the way you sent him a glare.

“unless, you wanna sleep in the library, cupcake.” he added.

seeing his point, your lips formed into a defeated pout as you started to gather your things, double checking to make sure you saved your work in your laptop. pushing the chair in, you grabbed your bag and slung it over your shoulder. All you need right now is to lie down in your bed after a good shower.

“i’ll see you tomorrow. you better not copy a whole wikipedia page again, san.” you said, walking past him.

you were a few steps away from the library’s main door until you heard san calling out your name, making you freeze momentarily in place. confused, you turned around to see san rubbing the back of his neck.

“i..” he started.

your eyebrows furrowed, puzzled to see why he was acting this way. you patiently waited for him to say something, expecting him to send something snarky at your way. suddenly, he shook his head and waved his hand dismissively.

“never mind. don’t be late tomorrow, cupcake.” he said.

scoffing, you looked at him disbelief before shaking your head, turning around to finally leave the library.

meanwhile, san stood in the middle of the library and took a breath in before slowly letting it go, lips pursing out as he did so. his eyebrows furrowed, seemingly feeling a tad odd as to why his heart was beating so fast. The familiar warm feeling was felt in his chest as well as the image of you sleeping had popped into his mind.

with a shake of his head, san quickly made his way out of the library.

‘i have a lot more things to worry about.’ he thought.

❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁

it has been a few days after that and much to your surprise, san hadn’t been making comments at your clothes or hair or rather, everything about you. even yunho had asked if things are in good terms now, you and san. but you could care less, all you wanted was to finally present the project the two of you had finally finished just yesterday. although it was odd, you were actually grateful that the two of you seemed to have calmed down. yet you had to think at how long this will actually last.

you’re giving him three days at most before he starts his petty arguments with you again.

you failed to notice the one sitting next to you, thinking that it was only yunho who had finally arrived in class. that was until you received a text from a certain tall peachy haired friend of yours.

‘hey, i can’t make it to class today. i guess it’s your turn to lend me notes this time :p’ the text said.

with furrowed brows, you read the text over and over again. though the more you read it, the more you were confused. what was he talking about? yunho would never miss a class. plus, he’s literally right there next to you. lifting your head up, you decided to confront supposedly tall friend.

“yunho, what did you mean by this te-” your words died in your throat. instead, a sharp gasp was emitted from your lips.

next to you, san looked at you with a raised brow, amusement painted over the features of his face.

“cat got your tongue, cupcake?”

oh yeah, definitely.

how could someone not be surprised at the way he was acting now? of course if two people hated each other they would have sat at a distance from each other, just like how san would sit near the window, behind you, or even at the back row, just anywhere and not literally right next to you.

“any reason what you are doing here?” you asked, to which san rolled his eyes at you.

“you seem to forget that we take this class together, cupcake. plus, we needed to present today, remember?” he flatly said, now taking out his laptop as the other students filled the room.

you weren’t surprised to see the confused stares being sent at your way. honestly, you could be one of them too, wondering what the hell was going on.

“i’m pretty sure there are plenty of seats around?” you mumbled, taking your eyes off of him to take out your own notebook and prepared your stationary for the class.

“and? it’s not like i would burn while sitting next to you.” he retaliated while trying to hide the growing smirk on his lips.

“unless you’re secretly a mage and could burn me anytime soon.” san added, eyes not taking off of his laptop screen to check if everything was in check before going up front to do the presentation.

“i wish i could.” was the last thing you said before the lecturer walked in, and class was in session.

the both of you were supposed to focus in class but sometimes, you can’t help but to catch san’s gaze on you, him quickly averting his gaze away from you to listen to the first couple of groups present their work until it was finally the time the both of you were up.

honestly, you weren’t surprised with just how fluidly san explained every little details of your projects from the definition to the history, to the objectives, and even the cause and effects. you, on the other hand, would answer the questions being thrown in between your presentation by either the lecturer or from your classmates.

san would have to give all the credit to you at how calmly you responded to some of the most obvious questions as well. knowing him, his sharp tongue would have sent them a snarky response or two.

before you know it, the both of you finished your presentation.

“that was wonderful!” your lecturer praised, clapping his hands while both you and san bowed your heads simultaneously.

“i knew that both of you could work together, look at you finally getting along!” he laughed.

you and san looked at each other then at the lecturer, smiling awkwardly over at him. clearing his throat, san emitted a strained laugh while you just rubbed your arm. the both of you looked so awkward that it was almost painful to the eyes.

“we sure are…” you muttered, making your way back to your seat once the two of you were allowed to go back to your seats.

despite all of that had happened though, you felt like a huge weight has been lifted off of your shoulders. with the days of non stop bickering with choi san, the constant erasing and retyping up a few paragraphs, along with the all nighters being held… it's safe to say that you are finally free. for now, that is.

since the professor of your final class of the day had cancelled it, you had planned to just go straight home, considering that you were free for the whole afternoon anyway, and catch up on that much needed sleep that you had lacked the past week. And the fact that the next day is a weekend as well? You weren’t surprised if you slept until sunday. so as soon as the lecturer had wrapped things up for the day, you started to gather your things.

“cupcake, can i talk to you for a second?” san spoke up, making you halt your movements in packing the things up.

at first, you found the nickname to be utterly cheesy and a tad embarrassing. you had tried to make san stop calling you that, even if it meant for you to send a sharp glare at his way whenever he called you that. you had slowly grown accustomed to the name and dare say, started to like the nickname. as much as you hated to admit, you also thought that it sounded cute.

“what do you want, san?”

once again, it felt as if you were back on that certain day while at the library. san rubbed the back of his nape sheepishly and looked down at the floor, before taking a deep breath in, exhaling through his nose then looking up at you.

“care to have lunch with me?” he offered.

you could only stare at him, dumbfounded at his sudden offer. after a few seconds, you chuckled and scratched the back of your ear, while san scrunched his eyebrows.

“i'm sorry, i thought i heard you wrong. i thought i heard you asking if i wanted to have lunch with you?”

“that's what i just said?”

your jaw went slack as you stared at him with wide eyes, resembling a deer caught in headlights. your eyes searched his face as if to look for any hints of him just kidding and go back to bickering with you over the smallest things.

but it never came.

instead, he genuinely looks confused.

“and for what? are you gonna poison my food?” you eyed him in a skeptical manner, eyes narrowed. san snorted and shifted his weight on one foot as he crossed his arms in front of his chest.

“had i wanted to poison you, i would have done it a while ago.” he mused.

okay, is this really san? the boy who had laid pranks on you? the boy who wanted to make everything in class with you a competition? the one who made the both of you kicked out of the classroom? the one-

“cupcake? i'm not gonna hurt you, damn.” san reassured, rolling his eyes as he sensed the still unsure expression on your face.

“i'll explain when we get lunch, mm? now, come on.”

before you could even protest, san grabbed your arm and pulled you out of the classroom, much to the curious stares being sent your way by your classmates.

❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁

“this place looks cute. How did you find it?” you asked once you settled down in your seat, san sitting across from you.

the two of you ended up in a small cafe just near your college. you were actually surprised that you hadn’t come across this place from years of being in college. though with how it was surrounded by other tall buildings in the area, you thought that it would be understandable how you didn’t see the place in the first place. yet, you weren’t complaining. with how it was hidden among the large buildings, it wasn’t crowded and you liked it. however, you didn’t expect san to have known this place.

san leaned against the table, elbows both resting on top of the faux marble with a shrug of his shoulders, and then he smiled. you silently took the short chance to admire the way his usual sharp gaze looked so… tender with the way he smiled, some sort of fiery yet passion had glazed over them. you recently noticed how he had an eyebrow slit as well, not even going to lie to yourself at how he managed to pull that look.

“i recently knew about this place a few days ago on the way home after football practice.” he simply answered, glancing out the windows that seemed to almost reach the floor.

of course, the aesthetically pleasing cafe was not enough to keep your mind from wandering off. something was still bugging you on the way here. mimicking the way he rested his elbows on the table, you leaned a little closer to him and called out his name, making sure you had san’s attention.

“is there a specific reason why you suddenly wanna have lunch with me?” you asked, the usual sharpness of your voice whenever you bickered with the male was replaced with a soft, yet genuine curiosity laced in your tone as you spoke.

san, realising the real reason he had brought you here in the first place, sent you a little smile, albeit awkwardly.

“well, you know how the college’s football team would have a game every year, no?” he started, not really sure as to how to really break it to you.

“i mean, obviously. you guys have it every year, and have yet to have one this year.” you said, now resting your chin on the palm of your hand.

“which is really soon.” he added.

“how soon?”

“next week on wednesday? damn, i knew you weren’t into our matches but i didn’t it was to the point you would forget the dates.” he laughed, shaking his head.

“you gotta remember that i was also busy burying myself researching about our topic.” you deadpanned at him.

the both of you looked up as an elderly lady came to your table with a tray in her hands filled with your orders, mumbling a low ‘thank you’ as soon as she walked away. swirling your straw around in your milkshake, you took a small sip out of it, humming in approval as soon as the sweetness from the drink washed over your tastebuds.

“anyways, what about the game?” you asked, taking another sip from your milkshake.

“will you be coming?”

that was enough to make you choke onto your drink, causing you to choke as san quickly handed you a napkin with wide eyes to which you gratefully took and wiped the corner of your lips and chin, looking down at your clothes in case some of the droplets landed on them.

“you okay there, cupcake?” he asked, concerned but still amused to see your reaction.

“i.. you do know that i barely even know how football works.” you started with a slight cough in your sentence.

“so? i’m sure like half of the college doesn’t even know how it works.” he replied with a nonchalant shrug of his shoulders, taking a small piece of his chocolate cupcake, promptly eating it once he lifted the fork up to his lips.

“and why are you asking me whether i will come or not?”

you were genuinely confused at this point. you barely even know how football works, all you know is that someone just had to bring the ball to the opponent’s goal and… touchdown? yeah, that’s pretty much it.

“well.. It’s either a yes or a no question. you can either come or not, your choice” was san’s response.

his gaze was on the little piece of the cupcake he had on his fork, but instead of eating it, he poked it against the surface of the plate. he didn’t have the courage to actually voice out his reason, san knew he had a bit of a difficulty when it comes to voicing his feelings. especially if it involved some type of apology.

you could only stare at him in silence. so many thoughts suddenly swarmed in your mind at his offer. what happened to the san who always started arguments with you, and who is this quiet boy sitting in front of you poking his cupcake? you decided to shrug the thoughts away,

“i’ll think about it.” you mumbled.

silence started to fill in between the both of you, both eyes focused on either your drinks, your food, or the scenery out the window. the longer the both of you were in, the more you were feeling fidgety in your seat. as if wanting to fill it, you parted your lips to start a random topic.

“y/n.”

the way san suddenly called your name made you stop yourself, caught off guard from the way he had called your name. usually it would be the usual nickname. when your eyes met with his own, you tilted your head slightly to the side as if urging him to continue whatever he was about to say. you couldn’t help but to notice the slight flicker of conflict happening in his eyes along with the way san’s lips opened and closed, looking like a fish out of water, as he contemplated his words. as if to reassure him that he could take his time, you sent him a gentle smile.

but what happened after that made san freeze in place.

your hand, although a bit unsure, reached out to grab his. switching his gaze from your hand in his to your eyes, he could feel the growing warmth spreading all over his chest yet again. before he could ask what you were doing, you beat him to it.

“take your time in collecting your thoughts, i’m ready to listen.” you whispered.

it was another side of yours he hadn’t seen before. well, towards him, that is. san would always be greeted with your sharp tongue and the irritated tone of your voice whenever the both of you were caught in the middle of your heated arguments. but this time… you sounded so.. gentle? san wasn’t sure but all he knew is that your words managed to comfort him.

with a faint nod of his head, his eyelids fluttered shut as he took in a few deep breaths to calm his nerves, hand still holding onto yours. once ready, he faced you yet again.

“do you… really hate me?” he asked.

the question surprised you.

yes, yes i do hate you. yes, i hate how you make everything a competition whenever we have class together. i hate how you would smugly act like you weren’t the one who kicked my chair. i hate how you have to act like a total smartass and make me look dumb whenever we have our debates.

you wanted to say those words but.. somehow, you couldn’t. from the last few times of working the project with him, you had come to the realisation that all of it was childish, that all of it was merely petty. is it really hate? or was it just pure annoyance?

you swallowed thickly as you subconsciously gave san’s hand a gentle squeeze, to which made the male look down at your intertwined hands.

“i’m gonna have to know the same thing.” you said underneath your breath.

the words that left your lips made san shake his head, calling out your name softly so that you could look at him.

“i… never hated you. i guess i just felt.. challenged?” he explained, grimacing at his choice of words.

“if you meant by the one time i beat your score back then i don't think it's val-”

“no, god, no!” san cut you off immediately with a shake of his head. straightening up in his seat, he had decided that it was time to get this over with.

“i guess… i guess i just thought that you were interesting to me. where you would be so unbothered by everything around you, the only concern you had were about your studies.” san explained softly, and you listening to his explanation intently.

“and from the way you talk about things so animatedly towards yunho, believe me, i heard about the stories you told to him when i was sitting behind you.” he chuckled at the way your ears turned pink, playfully glaring at him.

“i can't help but to feel intrigued but the more i wanted to shove those feelings away, the more it started to bother me. the more it bothered me, the more i… grew angry.” he said sheepishly as he saw the way your eyes somehow brightened up upon finally registering the words in your head and realising something.

“and i'm guessing you took the anger out on me?” you asked, to which san hung his head low with a small guilty nod of his head.

you couldn't help but sigh. true, there was a lot to process on. with how he had treated you before, surely, you would have yelled at him right in the face for doing so. you could even dump your milkshake on top of his head to get a taste of his own medicine from how he embarrassed you from his pranks.

but… but you just can't.

“as much as i wanna punch you for making my whole years of college a living hell,” you spoke, san flinching his shoulders as he caught his lower lip in between his teeth, preparing himself for whatever has to come.

“i acknowledge your intentions.” you added.

“however, that doesn't mean i condone your actions, choi san.”

san nodded his head quickly at your words. he won't lie, he had never thought that the short period of time working on the project with you was enough to reevaluate his actions towards you. he had remembered the time where one of his friends on his team, mingi, explained that it was no use trying to take his frustrations out on you by picking up the pettiest arguments instead of talking things through. yet, he was stubborn.

if he was being honest, san was grateful that the lecturer had assigned both of you as partners for the project. had he not, god knows how long san would have taken to actually speak about this with you.

the squeeze on his hand managed to gain his attention, his piercing gaze softening up at the sight of your warm smile.

“i want you to promise me something, san.” you spoke once again, him tilting his head to urge you to say whatever it is.

“i want you to promise me that we won't fight anymore. it will take time for me to completely forgive you yet that doesn't mean i will pass an opportunity to start over.” you said, face all serious yet your eyes held the same gentleness to them.

san could only stay silent. not because he was contemplating your words but rather, surprised that you wanted to actually start over with him. the warmth in his chest only now expanding and surging throughout his whole body, while the palpitations of his heart increased. he's relieved. he's happy. and.. he wants to start over again. with his cheshire cat smile, san nodded his head.

“i promise.”

❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁

“and aurora team has won the game!” the speaker announced in the remaining few seconds of the match.

that alone was enough to make the whole crowd go wild. some screaming, some waving their hands frantically in the air. the other side, some held disappointed looks while most consoled the losing football team. In the field, players shook their hands while praising each team for playing well.

placing his hands on his hips, san tried to catch his breath from the intense match earlier before taking off his helmet and shook his head, his raven strands were a tad damp from the sweat. his eyes were looking around for you, though he swore he had seen your face right in the front row as they were preparing for the game earlier on but you weren’t there? maybe it was his imagination

feeling a slight weight on his shoulder, san looked at the owner. wooyoung, who was the one patting his shoulder, sent him his usual bright grin, promptly patting san’s ass. the latter wasn’t feeling uncomfortable from it, knowing how it was his best friend’s way of being affectionate.

“good game out there, san.” he laughed, slinging his arm around san’s shoulder as they walked.

“yeah, you too, wooyoung! your defenses have improved.” san praised the other boy who let out a light chortle.

“gotta be on a par with my best friend, ya know?” wooyoung joked, letting san’s shoulders go so that the both of them could freshen up.

it was when san finally got out of the locker room that he saw a figure he didn’t expect to see. pushing yourself off of the wall you were leaning against, you approached san, his eyes focusing on some kind of a small box with a neatly tied bow stuck on the lid. though you had a little scowl on your face, your eyes looked to the side to hide the growing crimson blooming over the apples of your cheeks.

“you played well today so here. consider it as a treat for you.” you mumbled, effectively making san’s eyes to widen ever so slightly, yet he decided to tease you a little more.

“you never fail to surprise me with your unpredictable self, cupcake.” he chuckled, taking the both into his hands. it was rather light weighted, he was almost convinced that it didn’t have anything in it but with the slight rattle from the inside, there was something inside.

“can i open this?” he asked, you nodding your head.

your eyes watched him slowly untying the little bow you had made yourself before he slowly opened the lid, anxiously waiting to see his reaction upon seeing the little gift you had given him. a gasp resonated around the both of you as san’s eyes widened at the sight.

reaching into the box, he lifted up the little bracelet decorated with black and purple beads, seemingly handmade. he couldn’t help but to notice the little cupcake charm dangling off the bracelet along with his initials.

“i thought that cupcake would remind you of me just how a mountain reminded me of you.” you said.

only now did san realise the bracelet around your wrist, only the beads were in your favourite colours with your initials on them instead. He also didn’t fail to notice the little mountain charm dangling on it as well.

“i’m sorry if it’s not much but i really hope you i-”

your words were suddenly caught in your throat as you were engulfed into a tight hug. the familiar scent of san’s cologne wafted into your nose and filled your senses, slowly making you intoxicated and wanting more. slowly, your arms encircled themselves around san’s torso, feeling him hold you closer against him and felt a slight pressure brushing against your ear.

“thank you, cupcake. i love it, a lot.” he whispered.

those words were enough to make your lips stretch out into a wide grin as you buried your face against his shoulder, thankful that he couldn’t see the pinkness blooming over your cheeks.

“should we celebrate your victory at the cafe, san?” you mumbled, almost muffled with how your face was pressed against his shoulder.

laughing lightly, he pulled away ever so slightly, just enough to have a look of your face and nodded his head. before the two of you started to walk, san held out the box and asked if you could put the bracelet on him, claiming it was much more special to have the maker putting it on instead of him. of course, you couldn’t resist. especially not when he looked at you with those puppy eyes of his.

once it was on, you watched as the male happily shook his hand gently and watched with an awed expression at the way the little charm moved. content, he sent his bright grin and held out his arm for you to take, which you happily took as the both of you started to make your way to the cafe

❁❁❁❁❁❁❁❁

“hey san, your girl’s here!” wooyoung’s loud voice as soon as he saw you making your way to the sidelines of the field made san stop his stretches, all sweaty from the amount of times he practiced for the day.

“wow, she brought food too?!” mingi’s deep voice boomed, getting up from the grass and jog up towards you, san trailing behind.

“hey guys! I brought food since i know you guys must’ve been starving from practice.” you laughed as soon as yeosang made his way near wooyoung, no doubt wondering if you had brought any chicken with you.

soon, the rest of the team had sat down in a small circle eating the food that you had brought for them. some of them were still discussing their strategies and forms when on the field in order to improve their mistakes, while some are just relaxing and talking about random topics. it was when you felt two arms wrapping themselves around your waist made you look up, seeing the bright smile of your boyfriend, san.

true to his words, san kept his promise in starting over with you. the next few days after the incident in the cafe were a bit awkward, san constantly apologizing if he had said the wrong thing to you, though you had to reassure him every time that it was alright. you knew that it took some time getting used to so you were incredibly patient with him. your classmates, especially yunho, were glad the two of you had finally made up from the grudge against one another. it took you a while, but san managed to warm up to you, even interacting with yunho as well.

the rest of the time was spent hanging out at the cafe after classes, making it your and san’s favourite place to go to. the days of hanging out turned to weeks, and to months. it was the sixth month that things took a whole new turn, a good turn.

“what’s all this, san?” you had asked, noting all the decorations had adorned the small cafe,

from what you remember, the cafe didn’t really hold any special occasions, as the elderly lady had said. san merely led you further inside the cafe, his hand on your lower back as he gently led you to the back, effectively making your eyes widened in awe from the sight.

there, polaroids of either you or san or even both you in them decorated the walls and hung on the little strings. balloons were floating in the air as in the middle of it all was a small table with a tray of your favourite flavoured cupcakes. turning around to face san, you were about to ask what the occasion was. Yet your words suddenly disappeared.

san, stood in front of you with a single red rose in hand, his lips holding a fond smile with eyes looking down at you in an adored manner.

“y/n l/n, my cupcake..” he started, you softly giggling from the nickname. of course, he just had to throw that name in.

“i know that i have been a total ass to you during the first time. but i wanted to thank you for giving me a second chance to start over, and fix all of the problems we had.” your expression softens before you feel san grazing your cheekbone with his knuckles, making your stomach flutter at his gaze.

“you were always patient with me, still are. you weren’t afraid to call me out on the shit i did. you’re always there to cheer for me in every match i have, even if you still don’t know how football works.” the raven haired boy couldn’t help but to laugh at the playful glare you sent towards his way before continuing what he really wanted to say.

“but along the way of our friendship... “ his voice trailed off, suddenly feeling his nerves racking up his mind.

as if sensing him tense up, you grabbed san’s hand. just as you did the first time to console him. the gentle reassuring look in your eyes managed to soothed san’s feelings, the nervousness slowly dissipating.

“all i’m trying to say is, i wanna try us, cupcake.” he finally managed to say, nervous eyes looking into your own soft ones.

his words were enough to make the smile on your lips stretch into a huge jovial beam. without a word, your arms wrapped around his neck, much to san’s shock. quickly gathering himself, san instantly engulfed you into his own embrace and buried his nose into your hair, lips brushing against your crown.

he didn’t need an answer, but he already knew what it was.

“what’s in that pretty mind of yours, cupcake?” san whispered into your ear, sending chills down your spine as he did so.

turning around in his arms, your own arms wounded around his waist, reaching a hand up to move some of the stray strands of raven locks covering his eyes. “hm, about us?”

the response was enough to make san raise an inquisitive brow, “oh?”

“it’s a surprise that at first we were at each other’s throats and suddenly, look at us.” san merely chuckled and leaned down just enough so he could bump the tip of his nose against your own.

“hey, lovebirds! hurry up or we’ll finish your food too!” wooyoung yelled, making the both of you look at him, realising how the whole team was looking at your way.

“you better not!”

and with that, the both of you walked towards the group hand in hand, the little cupcake and mountain charms dangling on the bracelets around your wrists.

#ateez #ateez writing #ateez fanfic #ateez au #ateez scenarios #ateez imagines #ateez fluff #ateez x reader #ateez san #choi san #san scenarios #my writings #kpop #kpop imagines #kpop scenarios #colly's writings

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escapewriter · 3 years

Text

pairing : yunho x reader

synopsis : yunho’s new school life isn’t as simple as it seems

genre : angst, school au, hella sarcasm tho

word count : 2.3k

warnings : lying lol, a bit dramatic too ngl

song playing : lie to me by 5sos (inspired)

a/n : i split these into two parts. the first part i wrote was early mornings or christmas at like 2am. second part i finished the whole thing at 1:30-2am. its always the time that plays a roll in these fics i swear. anyway, i guess its kinda sad? the sarcasm kinda cancels it out cuz pemdas but i hope you guys enjoy it lol. also this isnt proof read cuz i JUST finished it.

ateez masterlist || main masterlist

NOTE : italics is like the events that happened and the regular font is what yunho is thinking ig lol

“Alright, I got a question for you.” Yunho turned his head on the backpack he was laying on to look up at you sitting against the wall, “Have you ever felt, ya know, loved?” There was a slight pause in the air as he sat up, leaning on his forearms while making some sort of ‘tsk’ sound.

“Ha okay okay, next question, do you think about it? Like what it feels like?” He hummed, not knowing how to answer the question. Instead, he wondered how you came up with it in the first place. Were you going through something?

“You good there? You’re not sounding too well.”

“Oh shut up, its a genuine question because I have never seen you in a relationship.”

Yunho scoffed and lied down again, thinking about how ridiculous you sound, “Okay first of all, I’ve only known you for, what? Like 2 months? And second of all, I don’t need to be in a relationship to know what it’s like to feel loved.”

“Cap. There’s a difference between family love and relationship love. And how dare you criticize our 2 month long friendship? You know I’d do anything for you.”

His ears perked up, thinking about what you would do for him. “Anything, you say?” You hummed, taking a bite out of your sandwich. “Alright then, do this for me. Anytime I tell you to lie to me or if I ask if you love me, you say ‘I love you’, and then, maybe, I’ll be able to answer your question. Simple, right?”

But it wasn’t that simple at all, because before he knew it, Yunho just dug his own grave.

Oh yeah totally, that’s already a red flag right there and he knew that but he did it anyway which was the problem. He was hoping that you would show him what it was like to feel loved, and honestly, it actually worked. But that’s not the point here.

The point is, Yunho is having a whole story narration in his head and he isn’t even talking in first person. That’s the point.

But as he continues to think - and also continues to talk in third person - maybe he should be starting from the top. Obviously that whole picture reenactment scene was how it started, but he’s going to dive down deeper. Going back to two months before that scene, so buckle up, it’s going to be a hell of a ride.

Yunho sighed, staring at the building in front of him. He wasn’t sure why his parents decided to suddenly make him move schools, he was perfectly fine with the one he was at before. He dreaded to go in as he didn’t want to ask anyone for directions to the location of the office. Gosh, making friends will be even more difficult for him.

Taking a deep breath, he managed to take the big step of walking through the gates as he made his way through the hallways, all while attempting to avoid eye contact with anyone who looked his way - except everyone was in class already. However, after roaming the hallways, Yunho managed to locate the administration office.

Okay pause. He didn’t mean to get that into detail. Come on Yunho, speed it up a bit will ya? Again with the third person, really?

After speaking with the principal and getting situated with his class schedule, Yunho was assigned a particular student, aka you. What you instructed by the principle was to get him comfortable with his surroundings and fellow classmates. You were honestly dreading this because you didn’t want to have to babysit the new kid, and quite frankly, Yunho didn’t want a babysitter either. But the universe has its ways because there you two were, just two months later, eating your lunch and talking about love.

“Woah there, what? You call that simple?” Yunho simply shrugged his shoulders without a care in the world. “Yunho, wouldn’t it be better to hear it from someone who means it?”

Well, now that he thinks about it, yeah it would, but he can’t turn back time.

“I mean, I guess but either way, it’s nice to hear it, even if it feels empty, it feels good. Ya know? Like someone appreciates you.” He didn’t know what he was saying or why he was saying it, but all he knew was that he wanted to hear it from you and only you.

Maybe that’s when he knew he started to develop feelings for you. He only wanted you to say certain things to him and only him, but he knew they were empty. And it also felt good to be impulsive for reasons like this:

Yunho called for your attention away from your phone. You looked at him as he leaned on his forearms again shooting you a smirk, “Lie to me.” You hesitated, thinking that it was wrong, but it was also something he asked you to do for him. But it wasn’t like you haven’t said those three empty words before, he just doesn’t know who YOU are yet.

You gave him a soft smile, “I love you.”

So, at that point on, it was a sealed deal for the two of you. There weren’t any dates, no gifts, no anniversaries, just plain ‘I love you’s’ that you’d only say when he asked. It was a secret that no one knew about, and there were more secrets too, but he’ll get to that later. But either way, it was stupid of him to get involved, right? Why is he asking, no one’s listening to him anyway. Just continue the story Yunho.

Time began to pass as Yunho continued to dig his hole of death.

Or just continued to fall in love with you - in case no one understood. Again, who is he talking to?

The only times you ever hung out with Yunho were during the many classes you had together and lunch. Everyone knew you were table partners and lunch buddies, but because Yunho didn’t have that many friends - or just no friends except you - he didn’t hear about any rumors of you. No one was able to warn him about you.

No, it’s not a kdrama where the main lead or second lead is the bad guy or the ‘heartbreaker’.

You were never good at love. You were good at faking it, per say, but any relationship you were in, you could never find yourself to actually fall for the other person who did. It frustrated you more than anything because all of your exes are amazing people and deserve more. But because you couldn’t feel that love spark, you just lied to them in fear of hurting them without saying those three words back. You were a liar.

But times were different with Yunho. The obvious reason that he asked you to lie to him about loving him. It felt violating because it was something you weren’t exactly used to. Sure you’ve said it many times without meaning, but this time, it was just different, and maybe you did find yourself actually putting meaning to it after some time.

But it only got worse the second your friend found out.

“You’re kidding, right?” You shook your head. “Oh my god, and you agreed?” In disbelief, your friend couldn’t process what he was hearing right now. The shock immediately vanished as an evil smirk rose onto his lips, “So just to clarify, you don’t like this Yunho dude, correct?”

Well, they didn’t call you the liar for nothing.

“No, I don’t like him.” His smirk only got wider as you tried to hide the distasteful look on your face when you heard his next words.

“Let’s make a bet. You actually get him to fall in love with you just by saying those words, but you can’t fall for him.”

“Hmm, seems easy enough.”

He laughed softly, “Well of course it is, but the only catch is that you have until the rest of the school year to do it, and that’s only what, three months?” You purse your lips, thinking about the time you had, and also the fact that you were actually going along with this.

Well one thing’s for sure, you’re a liar AND a people pleaser.

“Okay, that all?”

“Wow? Taking it on so quickly, huh? Well then, I’ll add something justtt in case. If you do fall for him, and I honestly don’t think you will, I’ll give you a pass…” You let out a breath of relief, “Only if you ghost him.” Immediately, you looked down at the table you two were sitting at. You faintly hear him call out your name, “It’s only fair. And if you don’t ghost him, I’ll tell him about the bet. Deal?”

“No reward or anything if one of us wins?”

“Well if you win, I’ll get you that antique vinyl record you said your mom has been dying for. As for me, I already get my reward if you fall for him.”

“And what reward is that exactly?”

He smiled evilly, “To see you suffer the consequences.”

Yunho did not know why you took that bet, he left right after he found out. He couldn’t stand to be in your presence or even have the patience to believe a word you said. And he had every right to. But it’s not everyday you hear someone ask another to lie about loving them. So, as he said, he just kept digging because as time continued and you two talked, he always got those three words from you.

“Do you love me?”

“I love you Yunho.”

You don’t.

“You going to lie to me today?”

“I love you.”

You still don’t.

“Okay, I’ll see you at lunch, bye.”

“Bye, I love you.”

Maybe you do. He doesn’t know anymore. Gosh, how did everything even get so messy for him? It was just a simple thing to ask; it wasn’t supposed to be like this. And to think he truly trusted your words when he confessed.

You heard Yunho call for you after the final bell. You were quickly making your way to the bus stop to head home before getting stopped by him. “I need to ask you something or, er, tell you something.” Your heart pounded in your ears as you processed nothing he was saying, only reading his lips when he said the words back to you for the first time. The ringing in your ear subsided as he looked at you with hopeful eyes, “I want you to answer me honestly. Do you love me?”

Your mind went back to the bet with your friend. You technically won but also lost, and you didn’t know what to do, so you did the opposite of what you do best, you gave him the honest truth, “I love you.”

At that time, Yunho was as happy as he ever could be, except it came crashing down the second you left to catch the bus. He, unfortunately, met your friend, who then told him everything. Honestly, he thought it was unfair how your friend didn’t play by the rules of the bet, but it didn’t matter at the time because he was hurt. Based on the rules of the bet, if you did love him, you would have to ghost him, and you haven’t, so that only means one thing, right?

Yeah, yeah he knows he shouldn’t jump to conclusions but it was a moment of weakness. He confessed, thought he got everything he has ever wanted since he transferred to that school, then immediately found out it was all lies. Oh and that’s not all, it wasn’t the bet your friend only mentioned. It was your whole reputation, and Yunho had no idea how he didn’t find out sooner about this.

Maybe he does know who he’s talking to. Himself, he thinks.

He couldn’t let this information slide, so he texted you that evening to meet up to ask you about it.

He was standing outside your gate as you emerged from the comfort of your home, “Hey Yunho, what did you want to talk to me about?”

“I know.”

You knew what he was talking about the second those words came out of his mouth. Your friend had texted you, telling you that he told Yunho, but you had thought he was playing around. Why would your friend betray you like that? No, why would you even agree to that stupid bet in the first place? But you played dumb.

“What do you mean?”

“Cut the crap, I know about the bet.”

Your heart sank as no words left your open mouth. He scoffed, “Well at least that confirms everything.” He turned to leave.

“Wait, Yunho stop.” He didn’t listen and continued to walk away from you as you quickly tried to keep up with him in the cool air. “Yunho please, just wait a second.” He stopped in his tracks, breathing heavily as you saw the warm air float into the cool night air.

Softly, he said your name, “Just lie to me, please.”

You heard his voice crack, eyes pricking with tears. “Yunho, don’t.”

Quickly on his heels, he turned to look at you, hot tears streaming down his face. He says your name again, “I asked you to lie to me, just do it.”

You hesitate, feeling weak seeing him broken and vulnerable like this in front of you, “I hate you, Yunho.”

One thing Yunho asks himself as he sits in his room, still recovering from what happened that evening, would it still be simple if none of this happened? He doesn’t know because he was an idiot for asking you to do such a thing. But then again, you were always good at lying. So who knows, maybe if the circumstances were different and he confessed, maybe you would still lie about those three words like before.

However, he can’t help but think to give you a second chance, but would it be simple?

#ateez #ateez scenarios #ateez reactions #ateez oneshot #ateez imagines #yunho #jeong yunho #atz #escapewriter oneshot

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closer-stars · 4 years

Text

Gut Feeling (4)

Member: San Genre: Angst???? Just a lot of discomfort and tension tbh Word Count: 12k (what the actual--) Requested: Yes Content: Like what I said, lots of discomfort in this. Anyways yay tension. Food mention bec people need to eat. Idol life is messy as heck. :flashes a peace sign through the stress: Also roughly around last few weeks of inception going thanxx promotions lmao Note: One month later, Part 4 is here. Apologies for the late delivery, my mental health really took a dive with everything happening lately. Things are kind of looking up but not entirely. Also this idea really marinated in my head that’s why it’s so long... So much you could do with this prompt tbh. TY to @hwaberrykiwi @yeocult @yeochikin and @barsformars for dealing with out of the blue messages regarding this fic when I was writing-- disregarding the weeks long silence from me.... hahah ily i’ll link the previous parts after a day just so this could appear in the tags lol

Part 3

The past few days have been quiet. Nothing came up between the two of you since that night. Nothing came up but things have quieted down. You can only suppose that it’s because of how exhausting it has been. At least that’s what you think when you try to rationalize it to the strained schedules getting to him now. That’s the only way you’ve been able to keep yourself together in front of everyone, by rationalizing everything that feels off with exhaustion.

It works to a degree. The makeup covers up the lack of sleep beneath their eyes but it can’t add to the needed sparkle in their eyes. That’s where the ring lights come in. Everything physical can be fixed with makeup and lighting, that’s what the industry does. But emotional? That’s another thing altogether.

Things were technically smooth sailing despite the chaos. You still go home late, just not for the usual reasons. You still go home late when the members stay late in the studio but that isn’t often at this point. They’re still human, they need rest. On the other hand, Hongjoong still goes to the studio though not to the point where Seonghwa has to pester him to go home. You bring Hongjoong home often now. During this leg of promotions, it’s Yoon who brings them to the first half of their schedules, Bae brings them to the second half-- it’s not easy waking up at 4am just to bring eight boys to their schedules. You’re in charge when it comes to the late night schedules. At least this way, you don’t have to talk to them since they’re too worn from the day’s activities.

Hongjoong sits on the passenger seat next to you, busy eating the dinner you had bought for him. The ride home is quiet, just him munching on his much needed meal and the ice cubes in your respective drinks.

“Manager-nim?” He speaks up carefully.

You hum in response, still not tearing your eyes away from the road.

“Has San been okay?”

That catches you off guard for a moment. “As far as I know, yes? Did something happen?” Something that didn’t revolve around _that_.

He sips on his coffee for a moment, mulling over your words. “He’s just been in his head more often nowadays, I thought he might have talked to you about what’s on his mind.” He reasons softly against the lid of his cup. Now he’s not the type to force his members to talk to him about their issues, they do have a day where they gather and talk about concerns from the past week and the upcoming week. Despite that, there are some worries that can’t wait for the weekly session.

You hum in thought. That’s not good. “He hasn’t told me anything.” You return. How can he? He’s often at the farthest end of the car, slumped over catching up on rest. “Is there something I need to be aware of, Hongjoong?”

Your words cause him to laugh thoughtfully. “You’d think because I’m the leader, I’d know what’s on their minds…” He starts. “I don’t know what’s on his mind, much less know what could have happened. If he does tell you something that I might need to know...” He trails off, but you understand where he’s trying to get.

“I know.” You return gently. You had your doubts that he’d talk about it, especially to you. “Don’t push yourself too hard on it regardless. Though, I do think he talks to Seonghwa or Wooyoung about these kinds of stuff doesn’t he?”

“That’s true.” You can tell that the air in the car has eased a little and with that the rest of the drive has turned quiet.

Upon arriving home, Hongjoong slides off his seat, rearranging his things. Considering the two of you lived in the same building, it was still the two of you on the way up. Perhaps San learned this habit from his hyungs?

Now that you think of it, you wonder how San has been. You know how tired he is when there’s no cameras around but still he gives so much for the team.

“Manager-nim?” He says carefully while the two of you wait for the elevator to bring you to your designated floors. You respond with a soft hum. “If the boys start to act up, please tell me. I know you’re the manager but sometimes they get too much to handle, I can keep them in line too.” His words cause the corner of your lips to quirk upwards, touched by his worry.

“It’s okay, Hongjoong. I can still handle you boys.” You tease lightly as you shake off his concern lightly. When the elevator alerts the two of you that you had arrived at his floor, that’s when he realizes that you didn’t press your floor number.

“Hey--!” It’s moments like this that remind you that they’re the youngest in their families. At his complaint, you shoo him off.

“Come on, Hongjoong. You need your rest more than I do.” You wave him off, chuckling at his shocked expression. Maybe being someone who works behind the scenes had its perks even outside the work environment. He pouts at you, unable to argue and he bids you good night, thanking you for the safe trip.

--------

He arrives at the dorm, which was mostly peaceful save for the frantic clicking of the mouse and keyboard tapping. At least there wasn’t much yelling but he didn’t need to peek into their rooms to know that the guys were playing an intense League match. When he gets to his room, he’s greeted by Seonghwa doing his usual home training. At least he had a shirt on this time.

“I thought today was your rest day.” He said as he hangs his bag on the corner of his bed.

The other, still in the middle of a plank, manages to rasp out. “Habits. Hold on.”

Hongjoong lets him finish his set as he changes into something more fitting for sleep. From the way his hair sticks to his skin, Hongjoong could only guess that this was probably his last set for the night. “Go shower first stinky. We can talk after.”

Seonghwa looks at his roommate in a mix of fake insult and annoyance. “Say that to me after you do your laundry.”

He looks at his laundry that seems to agree with Seonghwa. He carries the basket to their washing machine. “Now go stinky.” He repeats much to the other’s dismay, already loading it into the machine.

After Seonghwa has done his usual lengthy shower-- seriously what does he even do? The two fill the other on how the past few hours went. Particularly, the talks with San and you.

Seonghwa starts it as he dries his hair with his towel. “San didn’t really say much. He was pretty vague about it, something about feelings and something about wanting a re-do.” It’s usually like that at the start for San, he noticed. Always at a loss for words until he lets himself be alone. Regardless, if there’s something he and Hongjoong have, it’s the sixth sense when it comes to the members.

The leader hums in response. It was a bit of an expected move from the younger one to keep to himself, he does see a little of himself in that kid. He wasn’t that successful in his conversation with you either. “Yeah, they didn’t really say anything with me either.” He does recount to the best of his memory the entire conversation.

The two of them sit in silence, both concerned over how this could affect the group. Seonghwa then sits up, eyes shining with alarm. “I think he confessed to them.”

Hongjoong stares at him, dumbfounded by how he reached that conclusion until he remembers how the members often tease him when you’re not around-- he didn’t really join in on it. How he seems to show off a little more whenever you’re around. It’s to the point he even waits for you after you park the car, none of them even do that. He buries his face in his hands, he knows how San takes rejection so harshly. It’s one of the reasons that propelled that boy to dance like his life depended on it. “And I’m guessing, they didn’t accept the confession.”

The words make the oldest wince. “Choi San….” Seonghwa groans, dropping his body onto his bed. The two of them realize that there’s a situation on hand and they’re not really sure if the other boys know. Some of them could, some of them might not. “We should probably ask Yunho or Wooyoung if he has said anything in the near future.”

Hongjoong nods at the suggestion, suddenly too exhausted to say anything else. “Let’s just get some sleep for now. We still have one more leg of Inception promotions this coming week.”

Seonghwa switches the lights off, knowing full well that once Hongjoong’s in bed, there’s no getting him out of it unless it’s the next day. “Sleep well stinky.”

“Whatever.”

-------- The Inception promotions end without a hitch… well as smoothly as it can. Considering that there’s now a quiet lull in between the promotions, the boys have been using the time to clean the choreography and eat. It’s not ATEEZ if there’s no food. You only entered the studio towards the end of their practice, slipping quietly to sit next to their stylist and Manager Bae as they fixed the last changes for their performances. The rest of the members are walking around the studio, breathing heavily after what was probably their nth run of their next promotions.

“You’re bringing them home?” You ask him as the stylists show you the plans for their clothes. You’ve seen some of these fits during the photoshoots and music video shoots but some of these were a first. You were sure the boys would look good in these. You take note of the changes, taking a few photos of the sets to transfer to your laptop.

He hums in affirmation, too busy keeping note of the changes they discussed while you were gone. You notice San’s the only one on the floor, everyone else already packing up their things.

“Are you going to stay late tonight?” You ask him, as he’s still on the floor, too exhausted to pull himself up.

“Probably not, I promised Yunho I’d play a few matches of League with him.” Silence falls on the two of you, either one unsure of how to continue the conversation, much less on how to end it. Why did you expect him to stay? For more, why did that make you feel a little heavy?

“Ah.” It was the only thing you could think of at that moment.

Your reply causes a pit in his stomach to sink. Without thinking, he returns the question for the sake of conversation, even though there was no point in it. He doesn’t know why he still wants to talk to you, knowing that talking to you only puts more strain to him. “Are you?”

At his question, you nod. A flash of confusion on your eyes that are immediately pushed aside for the sake of professionalism. “Yeah, I have to assist in the deals with the externals team. I’ll see you tomorrow.” You don’t give him another word, opting to end the conversation with a polite bow before making your way to the office. It wasn’t the whole truth, nor was it a whole lie. Regardless, you tear your eyes away from him.

Silence trails behind you and keeps San company for the next few moments. He winces to himself, not liking how things are going between the two of you. He pulls himself up when Yunho calls for him.

On the way out, you’re greeted by Seonghwa’s figure waiting for the rest of the boys. “Oh, hello Seonghwa.” You say out of surprise. “Not grabbing something to drink from 7/11?”

His eyebrows raise, not expecting someone to greet him at this time of the night. “Manager-nim!” He greets you with a tired smile. “Are you going home soon?” He asks, standing a little straighter this time. “And, I think we have enough drinks at home…” he mumbles though it doesn’t sound that convincing to you.

His question makes you smile a bit, but you shake your head at his question. “Unfortunately no. I have to do additional work to do with the externals.”

His eyes widen at your words. “Did we get more offers?”

His words make you mull over your thoughts. You know of one offer that’s already confirmed but you doubt they’ve been informed. “Let’s just say, you’re really staying true to the whole Back to Zero hint you’ve pulled during your Crescent Party.” You say with a chuckle.

He doesn’t get enough time to understand the hint you give him-- a taste of their own medicine towards ATINYs when they ask for hints. Wooyoung’s already calling him annoying nicknames to get him moving and you chuckle at the pained expression on his features. “Go home, Seonghwa. Don’t want Wooyoung to annoy you more. You’ll know this once the deals are finalized.” You bid him goodbye, sparing the boys a wave before retreating to your office.

--------

It’s already the middle of the second leg of promotions and you’re already at your last leg of energy. You probably need around two to three days to recover properly, at this rate. For now, you try to continue forward, the finish line is oh so near. You slip into the studio, not surprised to see the lights still on, but surprised to still hear ATEEZ at this hour. It’s a familiar sight in front of you: eight tired boys on the floor or slumped against the wall. Those with enough energy throw any apprehension out the window and change their tops in the studio.

“Are you staying late in the studio tonight?” You ask San as you check the time. The boys are already getting ready to head home, San on the other hand hasn’t moved an inch. He’s in his thoughts as he stares at his bag. Your question, though, brings him out of his head and he picks up himself up. It was a question out of habit, months of having done it over and over, it was still a challenge to curb such actions.

“Yeah. I need to clean my levels.” It only made sense that you’d bring home since you practically live under the same roof. Were you expecting him to say otherwise? Slightly. He doesn’t look at you but he makes his way to the computer again.

“San! You’re still staying?!” Yunho exclaims, he’s the last out the door to which San acts as if it was a normal thing.

He laughs at the shock on his member’s face. “Relax, I didn’t like my levels in the last run so I’m doing it again. Go ahead though, Manager-nim’s bringing me home.”

“Heyy, we all know that means you’re spending another three hours.” The taller returns with a whine.

You watch the two banter, a small hint of amusement quirking at your lips but you immediately squash that. You tip your head to quietly bring the attention back to what’s at hand. “Just tell me when you’re done, San. I’ll be at the office.” Without missing a beat, you excuse yourself out of the studio. Two pairs of eyes following your retreating figure until you disappear from their sight.

Once you leave, Yunho looks back at the male with a raised brow. “San.”

The other makes a disgruntled sound at the tone of his voice. He knows what that means but he just can’t get himself to talk to you still. The taller male leaves him be and his shoulders fall once he’s left alone. No matter how many times he runs the choreography does he find himself satisfied with his performance. He can’t put his 100% into this when a part of him still lingers in thoughts of you. The song still plays on loop but he stops dancing for a moment, trying to bring himself into slowly going through each count to focus on what needs to be addressed. It goes well for the most part but in moments where he needs to catch his breath, to ease his parched throat, his mind stumbles to you. He looks at the clock on the computer screen.

At least he didn’t hit the three hour mark that Yunho betted on.

He changes into something less uncomfortable than a sweaty shirt before stepping out of the now dark studio in search of you. He sees the office not too far from where he is; he takes a deep breath, one that he associates with exhaustion rather than apprehension as he walks to where you said you’d be.

He peeks into the office, seeing you with your fingers threaded to your hair as you write and pause for a moment to shift to your laptop. He stays there for a moment, watching you work in your own zone. He watches you work from time to time, but rarely does he see you scowl at your work. The way your eyebrows furrow at what’s in front of you makes him ponder over what could be giving you a hard time. Maybe he should’ve asked you about yourself as well instead of having your interactions be centered around him. You’ve had a few talks with him though mostly centered around his experience and you occasionally have to reign him in when he’s too caught in his emotions. He wonders if this is why you fell for Seonghwa. He shakes his head to shoo these thoughts before he starts looking like a stalker outside the office, so he knocks twice to get your attention. “Hey,” he trails off, clearing his throat. “Are you ready?” He asks softly, standing awkwardly by the door once you look at him.

You look at the clock. It hasn’t been three hours, well it’s nearly three hours but not quite. “You finished early. Give me ten minutes.” You note as you pack all your things.

He stays in his spot, eyes roaming the room, seeing small things that differentiate your space from the others. You had small post-its color coded over some sheets of paper that were unreadable from his spot, typical work essentials along with a small corgi plush the size of his palm resting next to a few pens. The small thing makes him smile for a moment, once he sees that you’re ready to get moving, it disappears. He lets you lead the way to the car, popping his earphones in for the long ride home.

It’s quiet for the entire ride home, except for the radio playing whatever the public has been into. You don’t look over at San to know that he has his earphones in, neither of you try to start a conversation. Maybe it was better that way anyways.

Once you parked the car, you shake his shoulder gently to wake him up. “We’re here.” He wakes up almost immediately unlike the past times where he makes it near impossible to wake him up. He raises his head, slightly disoriented with the scattered lights in the parking lot, he looks to the driver’s seat and you’re already out of the car. He hops out of the car, running his hand through his hair as he tries to wake himself up. The car beeps and you pull at the door to make sure it’s locked. Once satisfied, you walk around and find him already by the elevator. This surprises you but at the same time were you expecting anything else?

You put on your earphones as well, as you wait for the elevator to arrive. As much as he wants to get on the elevator first, he wasn’t going to let you be on your own at this hour. The doors slide open and the two of you get on, staying on two opposite ends. Your finger presses his floor, out of habit, then you quickly follow it with your floor number. The cool metal shows a hazy image of your reflection, nonetheless you take the chance to look at yourself. Even against this material, your exhaustion is clear. Your eyes linger to the blurry image of San through the walls and his slumped figure as he looks at his phone. Thoughts of how to mend the relationship bubble in your consciousness only to be popped by the elevator arriving at your floor. “Good night.” You say, out of respect.

“Good night.” He returns under his breath, and he waits for the doors to close behind you before he lets out the breath he’s been holding. Now that it’s just him, he lets out a long frustrated groan. Why couldn’t he get himself to talk to you? To clear things out? He never gave you the chance to explain yourself or himself. He just took your lack of answer as a no and admitted defeat. Would trying to get you and Seonghwa together mend his damn heart? He’s also selfish. He wants you. He doesn’t want to lose to his hyung but Seonghwa is also his hyung. He’s someone he respects and loves like an actual brother. Another turmoil in his head as he watches the number on the screen reach his floor.

He arrives at his room, greeted by the sight of Yunho playing League without him. “Damn, look at you. You don’t need me to hard carry you through a match.” San muses as he tosses his bag somewhere in the room. He doesn’t know if Yunho even heard him over the constant comments that the game makes over each kill. Regardless, he needs a shower.

---------

He comes back from his shower and Yunho’s headset rests on his shoulders, scrolling through the internet mindlessly. “Did you get to talk to them?” Yunho asks, his eyes haven’t left the screen-- probably watching someone’s gameplay.

San lets out a disgruntled sound as he dries his hair. “I didn’t get to, they had their earphones on.” Even to him, this explanation sounds weak.

Yunho pauses the video then looks at the male, clearly not buying his words. “San.”

“I’m serious.” San interjects, his face crumpling in discomfort. “Even in the hours of my practice, they were in the office the entire time.”

“You know, if you just said you weren’t ready to talk to them, that works too.” Leave it to Yunho to cut to the chase.

His bottom lip juts out at such a strong statement from his peer. “T-that’s one reason too…” He mumbles as he climbs onto his bed, defeated by how quick it was for Yunho to see through him.

The other male stays on his seat, leaning against the backrest as he watches the other. “There’s no rush, honestly but bro, you really need to talk to them soon. Your own good is for the good of the group too.”

His words make the younger look at him weirdly. He’s aware of how his heart is on his sleeve since birth but his words make him wonder just how evident his heart is. The look on his face makes Yunho laugh softly, as much as San does his best to look after everyone, Yunho still had the upper hand of being an actual older brother. It felt like he was talking to his younger brother with how confused San was. “It was kind of obvious that you couldn’t put yourself into the practice earlier San. None of us just commented on it because we know you.”

San falls onto his pillow, half his face covered by the soft material as he shoots rainclouds at the male who is clearly unaffected by his attitude. How can he? Yunho’s right. It’s obvious when he isn’t putting his heart into it. It’s obvious when he’s got something in his mind while he practices or performs. He didn’t want to affect the boys with his personal issues. While he isn’t ready to talk to you, he needs to find a way to separate his personal life with his work life.

His roommate looks at the bothered male with a sympathetic smile. “Let’s figure this out some other time, it’s 3AM we need sleep.” He shuts off his monitor, already making his way to the lights. In a few days time, their THANXX promotions would start. San’s going to need to separate his emotions soon. Maybe those acting classes would actually help.

--------

It’s D-2 before THANXX promotions and the staff had made sure the boys were eating right. You were grateful for the existence of yogurt and fruits, otherwise having the boys eat their vegetables would be a headache. They’ve been eating enough while making sure to leave room for their rehearsals. Today’s the last day of practicing in their outfits for the future stages. Thankfully, the clothes for the first stage were already ready.

You and the rest of the staff had marked the studio with colored tape, while those who were in charge of production already rehearsed how the cameras would move. Truth be told, you haven’t kept up with the news but with how the production team was moving, you could only assume that the cases were rising then dropping. The boys do one run in their stage outfits with little to no issues-- save for San having to pin his pants. Once that was all over, the boys talked with the stylists for any minor changes and reviews for this set while you and the others removed the tape from the flooring.

The same thing happens for the rest of the night: managers eating ahead, switching around to keep an eye on their rehearsals, the boys eating later on then back dancing and singing. Perfectionists but it is expected, this song was more in their comfort zone after all. You’re the last in the office again, Manager Bae bringing them home this time. Brand deals were your worst enemy but they were a high risk, high reward if done right.

You peek into the studio, seeing the boys already packing up. Manager Bae is off to the side stretching his back after hours of moving around. You toss the keys to him to which he catches with grace, much to the group’s entertainment.

San catches your eye and you glance over at him. Something in you hardens but you try to keep it subtle. “Heading home early?”

He’s caught off guard by the question. “Y-yeah, I’m heading home with them tonight. You don’t have to wait for me.” He answers after recovering his composure. He shifts his face to your direction but you don’t meet his eyes. Silence falls over the two of you for a moment. With that, you nod at his words.

“Is that so? Then, get lots of rest tonight. I’ll see you guys in the morning.” With that, you tip your head to bid him goodbye, shuffling away from him and into your office. You don’t give him time to ask if you were going home as well.

His eyes follow your figure as you quickly leave the room and something in him causes him to let out a sigh. He doesn’t have the heart to stop you, wanting nothing but to relieve his stress with a match or two against Yunho. Hell, even just sleeping doesn’t sound like a bad idea. He lets out another sigh, shoulders dropping lower than usual before he steps out of the studio as well, greeted by the sight of his fellow members, bustling about by the elevator.

Sometimes being quick on your feet had its perks, for example, you slipped away from the boys before they could see you scurry away to your office. Once you had arrived, you let out the breath you’ve been holding in since you left the studio. Now that you don’t wait for San in the studio anymore, your schedule has gotten a lot freer than expected. While this should be a good thing, your body isn’t used to it and ends up restless. You sink into your chair, looking through your to-do list. You should be accustomed to rapid changes, but this was a change you had trouble getting used to. For months, you did your work in the studio, while San practiced his dancing and singing. It was to the point where you gave up using earphones to focus and let San perfect his technique until it became white noise to your ears. Now, the silence was deafening. Earphones are popped into your ears, putting your music on shuffle.

[ Manager Bae to Manager Chat ] Bringing the kids home today! You guys want anything on the way back?

You bring your phone up to your eyes, a frown on your lips as you think of what to reply.

[ You to Manager Chat ] Sweet Cream Cold Brew and chicken sandwich please? I’m staying in the office for overtime lol

[ Manager Bae to Manager Chat ] Call.

You look at the time. It’s 9PM. He won’t be back until 10 or 11 depending on the rush. Hell, you realized that it’s been a while since you managed to catch a breather in the office. You could barely keep your focus so you end up looking through your phone, doing the routine clean up for the sake of your phone memory.

For the sake of your sanity, for once, you don’t push yourself to work at least until your (late) dinner comes in. You decide to call your best friend, in need of an ear that would listen because shit your thoughts are just a jumbled mess now. Her phone rings on and on, until you reach the familiar beep of a call untouched. You try again but you receive the same flat note. You tap the red icon on your phone and opt to send them a message.

[ You to Jiwoo ] Need to talk to you about some personal stuff. Nothing life threatening, just super stressed.

You put your phone away and stare at your emails and paperwork. If you can’t write something up, at least you can organize something right? It’s mindless work until Manager Yoon comes back. Jiwoo replies after a while.

[ Jiwoo to You ] Good that you said it’s not life threatening. I just finished watching a zombie movie. I’m free Sunday night/Monday.

Her life choices barely faze you at this point.

[ You to Jiwoo ] Smart choice to watch a zombie movie at night. I’ll be free by like… past midnight?

[ Jiwoo to You ] I’ll buy the soju. Bring mixers and some food.

You break into a fit of giggles at her words. A serious heart-to-heart talk was always capped off with a chill drinking session at her place.

You continue to organize your files, moving some of the files to a hard drive, especially now that some of these files were for the duration of Inception promotion. As you go through your files, you’re greeted by various selfies from the boys, some expected from twenty something boys, some looking very much boyfriend-dol of them. Most of them coming from Seonghwa and San, though San beating the older by a few more. You remember how the conversations always went; San would always ask which one was better, you always doubted the legitimacy of your decisions as usually the social media staff were in charge of that. He would pester you still for which one was better until you chose something. Now that you look at them with the current situation in hand, things slowly made sense.

A heavy sigh slips through your tired lips as you watch the bar fill up, waiting for all these documents and photos to be in your hard drive. You know some of these photos were going to be needed for their birthday videos and other special events so it was best to not delete anything. Somehow your need to organize everything overpowers the small part in you that wants to process and understand everything that happened between you and San.

“I’m back!” Manager Bae declares much to your surprise. You jolt up in your seat, surprised by his sudden presence and you look at the time. 10:15PM.

“No traffic?” You ask and your eyes trail to the food in his hand. He catches how your eyes look at the bag of food instead of at him to which he laughs, like manager, like idol after all. The older male places your food on your table before he settles down by his space.

“Surprisingly none,” he starts, while you rummage through the bag for your sandwich first. “The boys fell asleep fast in the car too so things went smoother than expected.”

“They’ve been constantly on the move since September, haven’t they? It’s bound to catch up to them.” You say before taking a bite. With your free hand, you skim through your documents and emails. “After this round of promotions, they have a show with Kakao plus acting offers already. It’s almost still full speed ahead for them, still. You told the boys of the acting offers already didn’t you?”

“Yeah, Yunho and Jongho are the most excited for it. Expected since they’re the most vocal about wanting to venture into acting.” You could already picture the looks on their face when their wish came true and it brings a small smile to your face. It’s moments like that that makes you think your work is worth it. A few minutes pass as you get halfway through your sandwich and Manager Bae stands up again, ready to call it a day. “Are you still working overtime?” He asks as he glances at the time.

You take a sip of your coffee, feeling a little awake from the gradual caffeine fix. “Yeah, probably just two hours more. I just want to finish all of these deals and stuff.” He looks at you with a hint of concern but nods. You were a stubborn one, not wanting to stop when the finish line is so close.

“Don’t forget you got the car keys for tomorrow’s schedule.”

That makes you pause to do the math of your travel time plus sleep. You have enough time if you keep to your schedule. With that set, you flash him a reassuring grin. “Duly noted with thanks. Get some sleep already, you’ve been on your feet since early morning.” You say as you wave him goodbye. He laughs at your choice of words but lets it be. With that, you’re alone again. Alone with your thoughts and your work.

Maybe silence wasn’t the best way to deal with this.

---------

[ You to Jiwoo ] Fuck it. I’m gonna send you voice notes of everything that has happened. Cause I swear if I don’t get this out of my system, I might just lose it.

You look at the text you composed for a few moments, you’re in bed now, drying your still damp hair. You remove everything and write everything down in your notes app instead. There were things that were better mulled about first instead of being spoken about recklessly. The blank message box taunts you to say something but you don’t. Instead, you put your phone away and ready yourself for sleep.

---------

You wake up to your phone buzzing reminding you of the new day. The last you remember of your hazy dream was San. [dream dialogue?] You’re not sure if that was a good dream or not, details fade before you could make more sense of what it was. Regardless, it leaves a bad taste in your mouth about today.

[ You to ATEEZ ] I’ll wait for you boys at the parking lot. Be there by an hour latest.

[ Seonghwa to ATEEZ ] frodo_thumbs_up

With his reply, you trust that the rest of them would know of your order. You finally get out of bed, getting ready to start what could be another long day. Once you look presentable, you make sure you have everything you need for the day. As you make your way to the parking lot, you look through your messages, and you feel a little better knowing that all your drafted proposals have been approved and are just waiting for the green light from the partners. This also means you have to give the boys the rundown soon. You sent a message to the manager chat of the updates.

The doors open and one by one the members enter, causing the van to roar to life-- in this case, not the engine. The sudden influx of noise startles you, nearly dropping your phone in the process.

“Manager-nim!” whines Wooyoung, who was seated right behind your seat. “Why don’t you pick us up from the dorm anymore?”

You reach behind you to pat his head, or well whatever you can pat more of. “Wooyoung, you boys are already adults..” You reason lightly, trying to keep your tone light. Unfortunately, your head is anything but light. How exactly do you make sense of a dream where someone who has feelings for you appears in them? Especially a talent. You’ve heard stories, rare that they ended on a good note too.

Those words bring some sort of feeling in San. A bitterness that not even his performance insecurities could bring. He had his earphones in, not wanting to talk to anyone this early.

‘San’s not a morning person for the most part, just let him warm up on his own.’

Manager Hwang’s voice rings in your head and it’s the only thing that’s trying to reason with your uneasiness. Once you’ve appeased Wooyoung, you count the boys to make sure they’re all accounted for before driving them to the company.

The car mellows down into quiet murmurs between those who were awake and in between awake and slumber. It felt like everything was back to normal for the most part.

Things go by like normal, stylists who you haven’t seen due to schedule changes have decided to gush to you over the latest gossip that you missed out on. At least they were nice enough to gossip with you after styling the boys, otherwise that would’ve been a disaster.

“Yes, so they disregarded their contract and are dating a fan.” The tone gives you an odd impression.

“You make it sound like this isn’t the first time he’s done it.” You note, frowning at such idea entering your mind. It’s the look on the stylist’s face that tells you you’re correct.

He sighs. “I’ve worked with them for a number of years, their contract states they’re not supposed to date for at least two years after debut. This boy doesn’t even cover it up while doing his work. I’m not one to shame an idol for dating, I’m worried for those who have to cover up his trail and his members if he gets caught.”

Your blood runs cold at that. It sounds all too familiar for you. But you don’t show signs of your fear to the stylist, knowing better than to talk about issues of the heart with that at a time like this. That said, you opt to just frown and sigh at such actions. It’s hypocritical of you but you couldn’t get yourself to act any other way. “I hope he gets his act together.” You mumble.

“Who gets his act together?”

Everyone jumps at the sudden voice and heads turn to the direction. You stand up immediately after calming your racing heart. “Wooyoung! Don’t scare us like that!” While your tone carries no hint of malice or disappointment, it does carry a tone of someone who is used to his antics.

Your nagging causes him to snicker. “Sorry for scaring you.” He starts, while giving the other staff members an apologetic bow. “Who were you talking about?” Leave it Wooyoung to sniff out the sauce.

At his question, you shake your head, flicking his forehead in the process. “Nothing that concerns you, Wooyoung. You’re done with your hair and make up?” You shift the topic to something else, much to the relief of the staff and your heart.

“Yes~” God, it’s so difficult to stay mad at this boy. You watch him shuffle away to change into his performance clothes then shift your attention to the rest of the boys who were just catching up on a few minutes of sleep while waiting for their call time.

Today’s stage for them was going to be pre-recorded as they had another guesting at the time the music show will air. You wake up those who were still asleep when they had thirty minutes before their call time. “Guys, get ready. You’re going to be called to perform soon.” You say softly, not wanting to scare them. This somehow gets them on their feet quicker than expected, you look around then you spot the camera pointed at their direction. As a reflex, you immediately cover your face and you’re thankful that San managed to step in front of you, now joking about with Wooyoung as they warm up. You take the chance to slip away from the camera and you watch from a distance as they get ready, right on time for one of the production staff to usher them to the stage as they hand them their microphones.

Once they bid their goodbye to the camera and make their way off to the sides of the stage, a part of you falls into unease. Seasoned eyes look around the room, trying to spot for anything that the boys may have forgotten. ‘Mingi didn’t forget his gloves, same goes for Wooyoung. Did Seonghwa not wear his choker…?’ You ask yourself questions, all of which were answered as you look around the room and the tables. A part of you wants to assume this is just your brain drifting to that weird dream you had and for once, you hope that this logical side of you is right.

The monitor in the room has you watching how the boys do their rehearsals, two of which were to get used to the stage difference, the last being for the camera work. Once all that was done, alongside the makeup retouches, they were ready for the final run. It’s not a surprise that the last run was better than the rest, you checked your phone, it would take them roughly ten minutes to get back to the room.

It’s been a while since they finished and you excuse yourself from the mindless chatter the other staff had busied themselves with. “Get ready to pack up already.” Your voice gentle but still holding authority as you knew of their schedules. Where were the boys? You step out of the room looking for them. It took a few moments until you did find them but they made no move of leaving their spot. Something in you forces you forward and you see one of the production staff members throwing their anger on them.

“Excuse me, did something happen?” Truth be told, you hate confrontations but this is part of your work. If this argument is stretched any longer, you fear that the boys would be late to their next schedule.

The staff member’s voice booms, bouncing off the walls, as he decides to lecture you on how to make artists be aware of their own mishaps with logistical matters. While he didn’t call you names, it was evident that his anger was starting to become misdirected. It’s a miracle how you managed to hold your ground amidst the tirade despite the storm brewing behind your eyes. So you smile, bright and easy against the man. “Yes, while I would like us to deal with this now, I have to bring these boys to their next schedule--” He cuts you off with another rant, and your features stiffen. As you were about to open your mouth, you feel someone’s arms block you. A few blinks try to get you back to reality and you look at the arm in between you and the staff.

Seonghwa.

Hongjoong and San are trying to appease the staff member. Your mind goes into static, you tell the others to go back to the room to pack everything up. “Meet you by the car. Your next schedule is an hour away. Let’s hope there’s no traffic.” You say and Yunho manages to reign the rest in to do as told. Afterwards, you shift your attention back to the staff and put the two boys behind you. “I’ll cut to the chase. Here’s my contact details.” You bring out your calling card and place it in his hands. “We can arrange damage fees by tonight. I apologize for the hasty end to this discussion but the boys still have promised schedules to fulfill.” You bow out of respect and apology and leave the scene. The three following you close behind.

You know the three are talking, over what? You aren’t sure. Your mind’s on auto pilot, overwhelmed with everything. The stress has been at an all time high for you but you always push it down, focusing on what’s in front of you. Yet, the staff’s outburst is probably the last thing that’s going to break you. A subtle pinch to your arm and you bring yourself back to reality. You check their dressing room and everyone’s already gone except for the boys who were just about to open the door. “Good, let’s go.”

---------

The trip to their radio guesting was bustling with confusion towards the angry staff as they try retrace their steps towards that event. You on the other hand, are just grateful for the lack of traffic, you’ll get to the next schedule with a few minutes to spare. Nothing from their discussion enters your ears, too focused into making sure that everyone gets to their destination in one piece. You can deal with your emotions and reactions when the day ends.

On the other hand, San’s been brooding about what has happened. Seonghwa and Hongjoong ask the members about the broken mic that fortunately lasted until the end of their performance. He didn’t like how things played out there. A lot of things are brewing in his mind, all of which were related to you and Seonghwa. His shortcomings of not responding immediately also being an additional burden. The staff’s outburst stunned everyone and it was Seonghwa who managed to respond first by stepping in between the two of you. As expected of the eldest. Hongjoong and him only snapped out of it after he moved. No wonder, you preferred his hyung. Something was swirling in his pit and it wasn’t anything good.

Before San could make sense of these conflicting emotions, the car smoothly parks and the doors slide open. “We’re here.” You state and you hop off the car. He blinks out of his thoughts and follows the rest of the boys. They’re greeted by a warmer group of staff who give them a rundown of what’s to happen for this guesting. They’re greeted by lunch sets with their names on it and that was enough to elicit excited chatter from them. When the staff informs them that they’re eating as well in front of the camera as they talk about their album, it gets only louder from there. Even it gets him flashing a genuine smile, they drop their bags off in the room before being ushered to where teh show will be aired.

You followed the boys and were greeted the same way they were greeted. You talk with some of the staff on the way inside, they hand you your lunch set and you stare at it dumbfounded. “I don’t remember this being part of the fee..” You mumble. The staff catches your words and she beams at you.

“It’s on us! We know you guys have been on your feet for so long, so we figured it would be good to give you guys something to eat.” She explains and it’s another whiplash of emotions in you. Maybe you do need a day off soon. You look at the woman in stunned silence for a moment before bowing out of gratitude.

As the boys do their thing in front of the cameras, you stay in the room, slowly eating the meal you were gifted with. Your confusing dream must have been a warning of what this day would be. With this hour to yourself, your mind wanders to the gossip earlier: an idol dating behind everyone’s backs, for the lack of a better term. You shared the same sentiments, idols should be able to date whoever they want, but it’s the disregard to their contract and group that stresses you out more. One way or another, it strays towards San’s confession and his avoidance. He’s a man with his heart on his sleeve, and a head more stubborn than a bull. Just who did he think you had an interest on? You were mindlessly picking at your food, before snapping out of it when you remembered that you were eating. It took longer for you to finish your meal, not used to these portions after months of being on the move but you managed. Your phone buzzes and it startles you out of the silence.

[Jiwoo to You] What time are you free

[Jiwoo to You] need your help on making a statement.

You stare at the messages in confusion. What is she on? Just as you were about to answer, you hear the claps and the choruses of ‘You did well!’, ‘Thank you for the hard work!’.

[You to Jiwoo] three hours.

[You to Jiwoo] what happened?

You keep your phone and clean up after yourself just in time for the boys to enter the room with the same staff member telling them that the meal is free. The director follows them and thanks everyone for the successful shoot, thanking you as well for taking care of the eight boys. The praise catches you off guard and all you could do is laugh softly and thank them for their words and work.

Everyone could feel the end of the day’s schedule when they hit the road back to the agency. The boys were still in their stage outfits and they wanted nothing but to be in something more comfortable. For once they weren’t fast asleep in the car, they were too busy eating still (is there even a limit to their appetite?). All you could hear was their chewing and occasional excited yelling because of how kind the staff were to provide them with food and just let them talk about their album freely. A part of you smiles as they recount the last schedule. Let them have their fun before they end up talking about that damned mic. You had to admit though, hearing them eat is kind of making you hungry too.

“We’re here.” You state and everyone’s surprisingly finished with their meals. They’re that hungry? They hop off the car and rustle about to return into their regular clothes. They had to return these clothes to their stylists to prep them for the succeeding weeks of performance.

Once they’re greeted by their stylists, the environment suddenly booms with energy. Food really does something to these eight boys. It takes a while before you’re greeted by them in their normal clothes again. Their makeup long gone as well. They look like regular twenty something like this. Manager Yoon exits the office, taking the keys from you, the swift work surprising you.

“Hey!”

“My turn, remember? Hongjoong is staying late tonight..”

You pout, sometimes being the youngest in a company makes it easy for your seniors to tease you. After his words, you nod. “Alright, just give me the keys when you get back.” You wave the rest of them goodbye, and you look at Hongjoong who’s just leaning against the wall. “Are you going to stay late to work on music?”

He flashes an apologetic smile. “You need our side of our story too.”

This was going to be a long day but it had to be addressed. You just hope it would end with enough time to get to talk to Jiwoo.

The next few hours went by with the two of you trying to clear everything. Hongjoong recounting everything that had to deal with the microphone before the staff’s outburst. He even apologizes for you becoming the victim to those words.

“Hongjoong, it’s not your fault. You don’t have to apologize for something you didn’t do.” You counter gently. You just wanted your bed, to just retreat from today’s events. You can write up an email to the staff in the morning.

“It’s still our fault, regardless, that you had to deal with that.” Hongjoong returns, he’s not angry at all. On the contrary, he’s frustrated. Not only does he have to deal with schedules on top of schedules, composing, and San’s emotions, he had to deal with an unnecessary outburst that shouldn’t have been directed at you.

You just flash him a smile, dropping the topic. “Anyways, I’ll relay this to the staff in the morning. Manager Bae will be in charge of your schedules tomorrow.” You look at the time, only half an hour before Jiwoo calls. “Let’s get going?”

The ride home is quiet as well, at least the silence isn’t stifling. He busies himself with his phone, looking through anything new that has happened in social media. You look at the clock from time to time, a little bit worried for your friend who would call anytime soon.

“Are you okay?” Hongjoong asks, his voice snapping you out of your anxious state.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” He doesn’t need to deal with your own issues. “Can you keep an eye on my phone? I’m waiting for a call.” You ask just in time for the light to turn green.

He spots your phone, leaning against the cup holder and puts it on his lap as he goes through his phone. Fifteen minutes in and your phone suddenly vibrates in his hand. He looks at the screen and reads the name out loud. “Jiwoo is calling you..” He says, a little confused if this is the call you were waiting for.

An annoyed hiss slips from your lips. “Pick it up.” It was inevitable.

“I’m driving.” You state, asking for a few more minutes. Voice a little louder, to carry over to your phone.

“I’ll be quick, I need your help making a statement.” Her voice rings loud and clear. You look at Hongjoong, he probably put it on speaker. You shoot him a look to keep quiet.

“On what?”

“Fans found out one of my idols is dating and have been emailing the agency nonstop. I made a draft already and I need your eyes and thoughts to fix any errors.” She says and you rub your temple with your free hand.

“Send the draft to my email. I’ll get to it in forty five minutes. I’m on my way home.” You state, as you drum your fingers against the steering wheel. “I’m guessing this is what the staff was talking about earlier.” You say though a little softer.

“You know how word travels fast in this industry.” She returns with a groan. “Call me when you get home, I’ve sent the email already.”

“Will do, bye.”

She hangs up and you let out the breath you’ve been holding. The silence that hangs over you and Hongjoong is heavy. “Whatever just happened, is between us. If the others find out about it, let them find out about it themselves.” You rarely sound this stern and stressed that all Hongjoong could do is nod.

Maybe that was why you rejected San. Jiwoo was right, word travels fast in this industry, it’s why he always has to make sure the boys don’t go out of line too much for their sake. He lets them learn from their mistakes but none of them grave enough to affect their name. This one though seemed heavy, especially if fans were emailing the company already. He was going to need to talk to someone though to know how to deal with San should things go out of hand. But how can he when you tell him not to with such a tone? Hell, you don’t even know that he knows that San confessed to you.

Once you enter the parking lot you unlock the doors. “Get out of the car already, so that once I park the car smooth ride up to our apartments.” You say, a little gentler this time as you seem to have calmed down after such a bombardment of information. He looks at you with raised brows but follows nonetheless.

By the time you get out of the car, you see Hongjoong waiting for you with the doors already open. An odd weight falls between the two of you as the doors close.

“Is that why you rejected San?” Hongjoong carefully asks as the elevator slowly goes up.

Your eyes are shut as you let yourself catch a breather before answering his question. “You know already, huh.”

“Seonghwa and I kind of figured it out with his sudden mood shifts.” He reasons. “Yunho figured it out too but I doubt the others do yet.” He adds.

A groan slips from you and you want nothing to just slip down the floor. “Can we talk about this confession thing when your Thanxx promotions end?”

“That’s too far..” He tells you. For once, you can see why the members look up and respect him so much.

A pause.

“Fine, Monday. You have no schedules anyways.” This makes him smile a bit. The sooner this is fixed, the better. The conversation is fortunately, cut short when the elevator rings at your floor. “Get some sleep, Hongjoong.” You bid him goodbye as you step out.

He calls for your name carefully and you stop in your tracks. The lights from the elevator hasn’t closed either so you turn to look at him properly. “Thank you really for everything. You can lean on me or Seonghwa at least, for anything.”

Something in you softens at those words and you nod. “Yes, sleep well Hongjoong. Manager Bae’s going to be the one in charge of your schedules in the morning and afternoon.” With that he waves you goodbye, the doors closing between the two of you.

Once you were left alone, your eyes heat up but you shake yourself back to reality. “Still got work.” You remind yourself.

You don’t know what time you fell asleep, but it’s already noon. “Shit.” You immediately check your laptop if you’ve sent the revised statement to Jiwoo that you worked on. A relieved sigh escapes your lips when you see that you did. You reviewed your emails and see if there’s anything you need to get done. For the first time, you don’t have much to deal with so you check on your social media to see what’s been going on.

The idol that Jiwoo was stressing over last night is trending.

You stare at his name for a few moments, deciding if you should check what the noise is about or what the fans have been saying but you think otherwise. Instead, you opt to get ready for what’s left of the day before heading to the agency.

--------

The boys were on their phones while waiting for their call time. Some of them playing video games while the others look at social media. They see a familiar name on the trending topics and decide to see what’s going on.

Seonghwa immediately leans to Hongjoong and shows the news to which the latter winces. He looks over at San and he and Wooyoung are also looking at the same post.

“Should I message him?” Wooyoung asks, he glances over at the older two when he feels their gazes on him. “Did you see the news too?”

“Yeah. Check on him if you can.” Seonghwa gently urges, worried also for their friend. Truthfully, the rest of the group wasn’t that close to that idol but considering Wooyoung, he’s bound to have some sort of friendship with him.

San’s busy in his head, mulling over the news. They just resigned. Their friend resigned over being caught in a dating news. His eyebrows are furrowed, deep in thought as he’s just as worried as his friend but he’s worried also for you. For some reason, even when he tries to avoid you, his thoughts still go back to you. How many messages has he composed that he would delete? How many times has he tried to get himself to act normally only to fail and close himself off from you?

Hongjoong keeps his eye on his two members, clearly with their own problems regarding the news. He knows one will be fine, but the other… it’s hard to say. He looks over at Seonghwa who’s a little bothered by the entire thing as well. “We need to talk to Manager-nim later.”

“I’ll handle it. Think you can handle San for the time being?”

“Yep.”

--------

[Jiwoo to You] well fuck, regardless of the statement, they just resigned.

It takes a moment for you to understand what she was referring to but once you did, you freeze up. It’s like all your biggest fears were coming true, though not for you, it’s right in front of you.

[You to Jiwoo] drinks this weekend? Your place?

[Jiwoo to You] call.

You were going to put your own problems on the back burner for now. This girl probably had to hold so much together thanks to that guy and now things aren’t getting any better until probably months down the line. Too busy in your own thoughts, you accidentally spill water on yourself. “Please.” You murmur to no one in particular as you wrap your jacket around your waist before cleaning up the mess in the kitchen.

--------

[Seonghwa to You] Are you free later? I think we need to talk about San.

And here you are thinking you were their manager but then again, the age difference makes it easier for them to see you as their friend after work. You lean against the back rest of your chair.

[You to Seonghwa] Yeah, free by 6pm. I’ll wait for you.

Seonghwa shows the reply to Hongjoong and they relax a little. They need to know what you think of San because it was starting to get clearer that you never gave him a definite response to his feelings.

You stare at your messages, even going as far as reading through your conversations with San which consisted of various topics and banter-- with the occasional fishing for praise from him.

Why were you so affected by his feelings?

You spend some time watching some of the videos he has of the members having fun, you could clearly hear his laughter on one of them and it makes you smile a bit, missing that sound a little too much.

It takes your phone buzzing with another notification to snap you out of your thoughts. “Ah, two more hours.” You note at the time, not really looking forward to your talk.

[You to Seonghwa] do you want me to get you something to eat as well? Lol

[Seonghwa to You] hehe please?

[You to Seonghwa] lmao, fine.

Still a kid at heart, really.

--------

If the food you have on the counter from 7/11 says anything, it’s that you decided to wait for Seonghwa before eating, and that you’re prepared for his appetite.

[You to Seonghwa] I’m at the office kitchen.

[You to Seonghwa] I also have meat.

[Seonghwa to You] ^^*

His reply makes you snort, already picturing his excited grin at the mere mention of meat. It won’t be too long before they arrive at the office. The door opens mere minutes later and while you expected the room to suddenly boom with noise, it was only Seonghwa who entered the room. He catches the look in your eyes and for some reason wanted to tease you about your feelings but now isn’t the right time for that.

“Relax. Everyone else is just changing and getting ready to head home. I told them I’m staying behind to do some vocal practice.” He knows you well enough to know that you need the complete story when it comes to their schedules. Also because it’s not the complete truth.

You sigh in relief and gesture for him to sit and eat already. “Let’s talk about it when everyone else is gone.”

“No one can hear us here. The room next to us is the gym, the room next to the gym is the studio so you’re fine.”

“Seonghwa.” You say, still a little tense with the mere idea of the boys walking in on your talk.

“You can’t push this away forever.” He cuts you off, his voice taking on a little bit of strength that surprises the two of you. The look on your eyes makes him look away as he starts to eat. “I’m sorry about the tone but I’m serious. You can’t push this away and think it’ll fix itself.”

Silence falls on the two of you as you unpack your meal. You let go of the tone slipup, he was right and you doubted this issue could wait for Jiwoo. So while you wait for your respective meals to heat up, you tell Seonghwa what happened: starting from the small things San would do since your first day up until the moment he confessed to you. You admit that you were stumped into who he would think that you would fancy as you have inevitably been stuck to them since their promotions started.

That’s one thing Seonghwa didn’t expect, sort of. San’s jealousy is something everyone’s familiar with but jealousy in the aspect of romance wasn’t something Seonghwa expected in this situation. It actually makes him forget that his meal is still hot, causing him to slightly burn his tongue from the unexpected temperature spike. At the sight of his blunder, you hand him a glass of water to which he refuses as he struggles to chew the hot piece of beef. You decide to just watch his struggle as you sit there and eat your food.

Once he succeeds, he takes a few sips of water. His eyes clearly watery from the pain. “Are you okay or do you need a moment?” You ask him, trying to hide the fact that you were amused by his struggle to regain his composure. He finishes what’s left of his water before he turns his attention to you.

“Did you ever tell him your answer to his confession?” He asks you and it’s the way your shoulders drop that tell you that how you answered or lack thereof is the reason why San is the way he is. “You didn’t tell him that you like him too?”

Now’s your turn to choke on your food. You stare at him incredulously as you try to regain some sort of control with your food mishap. “W-wait..” you sputter out as you try to catch your breath. It takes some time before you’re able to breathe normally and eat. “I never said anything about me liking him?”

“You never told him?”

“How do you even react to someone who tells you they like you while nearly about to fall asleep while standing?”

“I don’t know…” he trails off, gathering the right words in his head, just as he was about to continue, the door swinging open causes the two of you to stop.

“Didn’t know you guys were still here.” To be honest, you didn’t think San would be in the studio either.

“San-ah, I thought you went home with the rest of the boys already.” Seonghwa says, straightening up as he sets his food down. The younger catches how his hyung’s eyes flit to you then to him.

The younger steps inside the kitchen, refilling his water bottle. “I didn’t. I wanted to squeeze in a workout. I thought you left already.” He returns. All you want to do right now is leave the room. He turns to the two of you once his bottle was filled and it’s unnerving to see his eyes look so steely.

“I was going to leave later but we can go home now.” Seonghwa returns calmly. His eyes return to you trying to look as if he was asking if they can go home. You knew better, the talk was going to happen some other time. With that look, you quickly finish your meal, then packing up the trash.

“Sure. Let’s go home.”

---------

The ride home wasn’t any better: both of them busy with their phones, both sitting at different sides of the car. At least you had full control of the radio.

Now in San’s eyes, he wonders why Seonghwa would’ve said he was going to do some vocal practice when he was eating dinner with you in the kitchen. He didn’t think of his hyung as someone who would lie. He’s better than that isn’t he? The younger does feel a sense of annoyance though, that he would say such only to go behind their backs and eat with you. He’s trying hard not to think of the worse of his hyung knowing well that he’s the better option between the two of you, but with the recent news of their friend resigning due to dating along with his feelings for you? It’s a challenge. He shuts his eyes and takes a deep breath, doing his best to calm himself down.

“San-ah, your shoulders are tense.” The older’s soft voice calls him out of his thoughts and it effectively gets him to drop his shoulders. Seonghwa looks at the other for a moment then returns his gaze to his phone. He worries of what goes on in his head especially after seeing the two of you in the kitchen. He genuinely didn’t think that San would stay late especially during promotional periods. He worries that he may have made it worse for everyone, especially him and you.

“We’re here.” Your voice makes the two raise their heads from their screens. The cold lighting of the parking lot telling them that they are home. You hop out of the car first, waiting for them to get out while making sure you got everything with you. Seonghwa goes ahead, hoping that the talk (or whatever was talked about) makes you move.

San does it for you though. “So I guess I got my answer?” He pipes up, lingering around you. His gaze beyond you but at his hyung who’s waiting for the lift. Your confused look makes him hiss in frustration. His reaction makes you snap, too tired from all the mental gymnastics you do, too tired from bringing them from point A to point B day in and day out, too tired from keeping yourself together for their sake, for your friend’s sake and for yourself.

“San, how sure are you about it? All of it? You’re confusing my care for something else. Everyone is worried about you, I have to worry about you as well and while I am your friend, I’m still your manager. At the end of the day, my job is to make sure you guys are able to do your job as artists.” Your blood runs cold at how those words rush out of you, you could barely look at him. The only thing you can hear is your heartbeat and the car’s security lock. “San, how sure are you about my feelings? How are you filling in the blanks that I should be filling?”

Those words make his feet move, leaving you in the dirt as he walks over to where Seonghwa is. For a moment, you feared that he would get physical-- boy has a black belt after all. He doesn’t. He just lingers by the back, waiting for the lift. He should’ve done a more strenuous workout just so his mind would stop running.

Seeing him look like so makes you sigh. You had to admit your faults on that, you’re just so tired. You promised your day off would be after promotions but you kind of wish you could make it earlier and have it this week. By the time you arrive at where the two are, the doors of the elevator opens letting the three of you in. You don’t press your floor number first, letting the boys get their rest first. You’re getting additional hours of sleep today anyways.

“Good night.” You mutter as the two of them step out of the elevator. Seonghwa returns the greeting and so does San. Though one looks back and gives you a friendly wave, the other stalks off, shoulders just as tensed as it was earlier. You look at Seonghwa and shake your head. That’s all he needed to know as to how the mere moments he was out of earshot went.

“Joong and I will deal with him. Get some rest and think it through. We still need to talk again.”

“Yeah.” You just hope you didn’t fuck it up for everyone. Something in your gut told you otherwise.

Part 5

#ateez fanfiction #ateez angst #ateez san #ateez x reader #ateez fanfic #ateez writings #ateez scenarios #bro it's been more than a month since i posted something #weeks since i wrote something properly #lmao pandemic tingz #anyways have this #the mere idea of not being able to talk out your issues just because youre so busy is Stressful in itself holy fuck #my writings

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tohokuu · 2 years

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i'm back. did you actually think i was gone ? last night was just a small moment of weakness. i am okay now teehee

i realized that if i leave tumblr, i don't have an outlet to complain about my garbage life

so let's start with everything that has been happening wrong:

so, yesterday my mom yelled at me all day. she yells at me anyway but yesterday was just... horrendous. it's like she doesnt understand how bad the things she says are. like .... i don't think she realizes how much it hurts me and how long that shit sticks in my head

i remember a while back she called me a burden and i just simply never forgot about that.

and then i wasnt able to go with my friend to the p1h concert yesterday and i was actually about to just.... yk..

and then i stayed up finishing assignments last night because i thought it was all due today but then my prof was like, you have until friday. it's okay, i forgive her because she's a milf yk ?

moving on, my car broke down this morning. like i was trying to start it but it wouldn't start and i genuinely wanted to just lay on the highway. it's fucking odd bc i started my car last night and it worked perfectly fine, so maybe my battery just died.. so I'll have my mom give it a jumpstart when she gets home from work. hopefully it's just a dead battery and not anything seriously wrong.

my dads been giving me a hard time bc gas has been 5 dollars a gallon and it's been incredibly irritating

anyway, i was gonna get starbucks this morning because we lost an hour of sleep due to daylight saving time.. i was gonna get something for myself and i also planned on getting something for my professor bc she helped me out w some stuff, but i couldn't even get her anything so i legitimately just... wanted to give up.

then i couldn't find my hijab cap this morning. i had to use a grey one rather than my usual black one and i was so ready to just... scream

and then after my dad drops me off to school, i quit the tennis team because I'm so sick of it and i don't have a car so... no practice

but i got a gym membership but once again, due to the lack of VEHICLE i can't fucking go there either

and my insecurities have been shining these days. i look like a fucking man. i hate how my hair is. i hate being overweight, i hate literally everything. i keep picking at all my insecurities. i look at any photo of mine and just... coil in on myself in disgust.

I'm literally at my lowest right now and i don't know how to fix it. i get so unreasonably angry when things don't go my way. which isn't a good thing but i think i just get scared when stuff isn't in my control. but i tend to express that in anger or i laugh it off instead of being sad.

after that, i was trying to connect my laptop to my hotspot and it just WOULD NOT work... like i was genuinely so sick of it... beyond annoyed and then my eyeliner wasn't fucking even. this is just the absolute worse.

then my yunho fic got fucking flagged this morning for explicit content like go fuck yourself, god

but i filed an appeal and it got accepted 3 minutes later and i know that's a good thing but why the fuck- like can't they do the same for other writers ?? jesus fucking christ

anyway, that's all. thank you, bye

#i am BACK #i can't leave this place #sorry

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slaveformingi · 4 years

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2nd Choice?! (M)

READER (y/n) X JEONG YUNHO (Ateez) With Slight Mentions of San. Genre: Smut, Sub!Yunho, Best friends turned into something more(?) Word Count: 4102 Words Summary: You have been planning the perfect date for you to go on with your crush but due to some circumstances, your date was not able to come with you so you tried to make Yunho go on a date with you. What would Yunho do once he found out he was just your 2nd choice?

(FIX ON! Yes, I am back. I am finally back with a new smut {As promised before} Sorry it took some time, I was really busy with some stuff and I constantly was facing writers block. Anyways, I feel like I kinda fell out of touch with writing and that’s kinda sad but do tell me what you guys think of this fic and if you would like a sequel to it. Till then, love y'all!! )

“He is so freaking perfect Yun, you should have seen him.”

You sighed happily as you sat on your bed, giggling. Your hands held onto your phone pressing it against your chest trying to keep it as close as possible to you. Another sigh left your lips as you began to remember his good looking visuals.

While you were busy drooling all over your phone, your best friend was sitting on the chair at your study table with his arms crossed. A slight frown was placed on his face, obviously annoyed by your talk of that boy and the lack of attention he was receiving.

“You do know that nobody is perfect, not even your lil loverboy, San.” Yunho says in an annoyed tone. He got up from his seat and made him way to your bed, where he plopped onto it so he could get you to pay attention to him. “I mean nobody in this world can possib--”

A finger was pressed against his lips as soon as you heard your phone notification. Yunho glared down at your finger before squinting his eyes as you. You were completed focus on your phone to notice Yunho being displeased at you as he slowly pushes your finger away from his lips. Yunho notice as the expression of your face fell from happy and cheerful to a serious and disappointed look.

“Oh no...”

“What? Loverboy stained his favourite shirt?” Yunho sneered.

“Noooo.” you pouted as you kept your eyes on your phone, “He injured his leg while he was at dance practice.”

You started whining out loud before falling back onto your bed rolling around while hiding your face in your pillow, “Why is life so crueelllll!”

“Good, I think he is--” You shot Yunho a glare before he could finish his sentence. You knew exactly what Yunho was about to do, he was going to trash talk your crush and you weren't in the mood for it. You groaned once he stopped talking and went back to whining against your pillows. It really ruined everything you planned out for weeks and there was no way to fix it.

Over the past couple of months, you tried you best to get closer to San, one of the hottest boy in your school. The boy who could made all the girls fall to their knees and beg him to pay attention to them. You too were a victim of his charm like the rest of the girls. But unlike the other girls, you were not stupid and you knew that he would not fall for you just like that, you knew you had to work your ass off to make him notice you.

You started to join the same clubs he was in, such as dance club and debate club, you even volunteered to be his study buddy for some of the classes you took together. You both went out a few times but it was nothing too serious and you wanted to change that, so you had made plans for a very romantic date. You had planned this “perfect date” of yours for weeks in advance but now, you felt like all of your dreams and efforts were crashing in front of your eyes and could not save them.

You hid under your pillows, forgetting that your best friend was still sitting next to you and staring at you with a disapproving face. You were grateful that Yunho was always there for you but all you wanted to do was to go on the date you took so long to plan. Then an idea hit you. You sat up and looked at Yunho cheerfully, “I know!!”

“Huh?” Yunho raised an eyebrow, confused at your sudden change of moods.

“You can be my date!” you grinned happily at him.

“Wait what?” he moved backwards until he was sitting on the other side of the bed from you, wary of your next move. It would be a lie to say that Yunho had never thought on asking you out on a date, or hold your hand, or share a kiss with you, or just spend more time with you, but your sudden decision caught him off guard.

“It took so long for me to plan this date and I dont want it to go to waste, so maybe you could go with me on it.. as like a trial run or something, so I know what to do or change when I go on a real one with San.”

“Wha-- Trial Run?? Why??” He couldn't process what he was hearing.

“Yeah, like I said San is injured so he can’t come, I should take this opportunity to go on the date with you to see what could go wrong or something.” you negotiated innocently, not realising the annoyed look on his face.

“So, basically you’re saying I’m your 2nd choice?” Yunho’s hands forming into fists with the sheets under him. “I mean, I guess you can say it like that.” you said think about it for a while before blurting out innocently; “Yeah, you're my 2nd choice.”

That was it. You hit Yunho’s sensitive spot. You immediately notice how pissed he look, you felt the tension building. Before you could say anything else, your body was pinned against your bed. Yunho hovered above you, his eyes filled with a mix of anger and disappointment.

“I am not a 2nd choice!” he growled at you. His eyes piercing into yours. His actions caught you off guard, he has never raised his voice at you. Before you could think of your next move, Yunho pressed his lips hard onto yours, all his anger and frustration finally coming out. You froze under him, still needing a moment to realise what was going on.

“I am not supposed to be your 2nd choice, I should be your 1st choice. I was here for you longer than San and you mean so much to me.” Yunho spoke, his lips only an inch away from yours, “San’s a fuckboy, the entire school knows that. His going to break your heart, y/n! Why are you too blind to see that?!”

“Even if he is a fuckboy. I-- I just want to feel loved.” you tried to tug your hands free from him but he kept on holding them down firmly.

“Oh my god, you're a dumbass you know that?!” Yunho spoke with an irritated tone. “I want you! I love you! I always want to be by your side! Why can't you realised that?!”

His hands slowly letting go of your wrists, he slowly cups your face and kisses you deeply. It took you a moment before you finally gave into the kiss. You kissed him back with the same amount of passion and desire he did, all your thoughts focusing on him.

Slowly, the kiss started to get heated. His lips moved from your lips to your jaw, chin, down your neck, kissing and touching all over your body. Your surroundings started to blur as you became a moaning mess with each of his touch. The sound of his zipper slightly echoed your room as you undid his jeans. Yunho lifted his hips and allowed you to pull his jeans down to his thighs. You smiled when you noticed the bulge in his underwear and a small wet patch at the tip.

Within moments, both of your clothes were all over your room as you both craved for each others warmth. You decided to take charge and pinned Yunho down onto your bed. A smile formed on your face as you ran your fingers up the inside of his thighs, spreading them to give you easier access. You rested your hand on top of his thighs before looking up at him, your eyes met his as you gave him an innocent look. Your facial expression did not match your hand movements though, as they moved to pull the waistband of his boxers away from his skin and let it go, causing it to slap against his waist.

Yunho was done with your teasing, he reached forward and gripped both of your wrists in his hand and placed them so they cupped his shaft, a soft moan left his lips. The sound of his moan was music to your ears, you wanted to hear more.

You slipped your fingers under the waistband of his boxers and tugged at them, Yunho lifted up his hips so you could pull his boxers off of him. He let out a content sigh as the constrictive material was removed, allowing his manhood to stand up straight leaning slightly against his toned abs.

You smiled at him, keeping eye contact as you lightly trailed your finger up the base of his shaft, stopping just before you touched his slit. Yunho’s breathing started to get faster as you rested one hand on his bare thigh, lightly massaging the skin with the balls of your fingers while your other hand trailed across the top of his dick, lightly teasing his head by trailing a ring around the top. The only sounds coming from Yunho was the sound of his heavy breathing and you didn't like that, you wanted to hear more from him. You rested your fingertips lightly on the side of him as your thumb trailed down across his tip, collecting his pre-cum. Trailing down the moisture down his shaft as you repeated the motion until Yunho let out a small whine.

You looked up and him and noticed his reddening cheeks, you simply smiled before spitting into your hand and smearing it around your palm with your fingers before slowly gripping the base of his dick. A satisfied groaned left his lips as he felt the warmth of your hand.

“Finally.” Yunho mutters under his breath causing you to chuckle slightly.

You slowly inched your hand up his length, watching him as his abs flexed loosened as you reached his tip. Trailing your thumb over the tip of his dick, you watched as his breath shortened into shallow pants as you repeated the motion a few more times, twisting your wrists on the final time and forcing a sharp moan from him. You looked up at him as your bit your lower lip, enjoying the sight in front of you. He murmured something that you could barely hear.

“What’s wrong Yun?” you questioned innocently, removing your hand from him so his eyes brought themselves back to yours.

“Fuck.” he sighed as he shuffled slightly on the bed, “I need more.”

“You called me a dumbass earlier but now look at you. You know, you're the bigger dumbass and a forward for not telling me that you liked me earlier. I followed that asshole around for nothing!” you sneered back at him, slowly wrapping your hand around him, “Your such an ass, you know that?” You started to pump him with each word you said. Instead of arguing back, all Yunho could do was groan at each move you made.

“I love the noises you make for me, Yunho.”

He groaned lowly and bit the inside of his mouth. He'd never thought he’d would be playing sub before. He'd always thought himself as a Dom since dominating someone in the bedroom fuelled his ego. He always assumed being submissive was a more feminine act but the idea of you dominating him made him even harder.

You flicked your wrist with a tight pump and watched as his eyes fluttered shut. You lowered your head and case a look up at him as you ran your tongue flat against his slit.

“Fu--Fuck!” Yunho moaned out, the sound echoing around your room, edging you on. You blew cool air over the wet tip; a whole new level of determination filling you as you wanted to hear him again.

“You're so big Yun.” you praised calmly, lowering your head to press a firm kiss to the tip again causing his hips to buck upwards so that his dick is pressed against your lips.

“Fuck, yes...” He whined quietly, all he wanted was to was to feel your warm mouth around him.

You ran your tongue up the underside of his length as you send him a cheeky wink. Yunho let out whimpers as you removed your hands from him. You slipped your hands under the back of his knees and tugged him forward until his ass was left resting on the bed and his dick pointed out at you for easy access.

“Please baby,” he groaned, throwing his head back as you held onto him again, “I was supposed to make you beg for me, not the other way around.”

You smirked at his words, you slightly been forward and opened your mouth above his leaking tip and stuck out your tongue to flick it.

“Fucking hell.” he breathed, trying to roll his hips up towards your mouth, you quickly slapped his inner thigh and a small yelp came from him due to the contact.

Yunho looks at you with wide eyes, silently begging you to stop teasing him already. You smiled at him as you loosely wrapped your lips around his tip and started sucking him gently.

“Fu--fuckyes!” he groaned, using one of his free hands to rest on the back of your neck to push you down further, you pulled off with a hard suck that caused him to whimper.

“No touching love.” You scored watching as his eyebrows furrowed and he nibbled his bottom lip with a small whine of annoyance. The annoyed tone left his voice and faded into pleasure as you put your mouth back onto his dick. Rolling your tongue against the slit, you used one hand to hold onto base and the other one on his thigh to keep his hips steady.You tapped your fingers on his shaft as your head began to lower slowly, Yunho becoming a moaning mess with each of your touch.

“Ye--Yes baby!” Yunho shouted as you rolled your tongue against the underside of his dick and sucked harder “Fuck baby, your making me feel so good-- Fuck-- I love your mouth--So warm--” He groaned as his hands started to flex, itching to grab something other than the edge and the sheets your bed.

You hummed in reaction to his praise, causing groans and curses to leave his mouth. Yunho’s voice getting louder as you began slowly bob your head and twist your hand that was gripping his base.

“I-- Fucking hell, y/n-- I love you so fucking much..” he shouted as his bucked his hips into your mouth, you didn't stop him, he was pushing himself towards his high and you didn't want to deny him of it. You moved your hand that was on his thigh and gripped his wrist and brought it to your hair, Yunho instantly ran his long fingers through your hair before pushing your head down at a speed and pace he wanted; hard and fast. You gagged slightly at the pace he was going, tightening your muscles around him.

“Fu--Fuck babe, I’m gonna come, I’m gonna come-- Please don’t stop babygirl-- fuckfuckfuck.” he groaned loudly, bobbing your head with his hands knotted in your hair and rocking his hips into your mouth. Hollowing your cheeks and sucking on him harshly, he threw his his head back and moaned out your name loudly. You watched as his abs flex and loosen as his cum squeezed down your throat, his arms and thigh muscles rippling under his smooth skin as his whole body shakes due to his high.

You got up from your position and lied down beside him, snuggling into his neck as he tries to steady his breath.

“Fuck, that escalated quickly.” you said after a few moments of silence.

“True..” Yunho smirks as he flips himself and hovers above you, “But let's see how much you like it when I tease you.”

(Author’s Note: Does anyone want a part 2 for this? If you do, do tell me and I’ll make one!)

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