#and it’s totally unrelated to new year’s so when we were considering calling a doctor we were like ‘’but they’re so busy. can we manage?’’

[pumpking64]

starting the new year off with a medical scare is…. sure an interesting sign for 2024

[filthforfriends]

Chapter 1: Checking In

The Sun is the Center of Everything

See Author's Note (CW: addiction)

Word count: 3.5k

Damiano David x Y/n

His family and his friends, mutual and otherwise, made tepid comments about Damiano’s wellbeing. They knew they didn’t have the right to ask anything of you, not anymore.

“Just checking in! I know the breakup was tough.” Tough. The word choice made you outright laugh. It was something you’d say to a child who just lost a football game. I know that was tough, buddy. 

“Hey, checking in, hope you’re doing well.” 

“I wanted to check in and see how you’re doing, y/n.”

“I know I checked in on you earlier, but I just wanted to make sure you’re okay.” I was forced to choose between my sanity and my relationship, but God granted me neither.

“I’m doing fine, all things considered.” “Checking in” was their excuse to call, it was a transition to statements like, “We all miss you alot. Hope we’ll see you soon, sweetheart.” “Well, I’m glad you’re doing well, since I know Damia has been struggling.” “Have you heard from Dami? I was gonna call and ask how he’s doing as well. I heard he’s not coping well.” “You were such a force for good in his life. I think he really needs that.” “I wish I knew how to get Damiano closer to being fine, too.” That last one earned a real life eye roll. At least his friends had the etiquette to feel guilty for dragging you back into it. 

You were certain that your heart couldn’t bear to love someone hellbent on self-destructing. You were certain that Damiano wasn’t going to get sober of his own volition. He’d lose his temper when you’d bring up those two years of not drinking. Articles, books, podcasts, speeches, YouTube videos, TV, movies, therapy, support groups, doctors, even a sobriety coach. You spent more time on resources for his addiction disorder than you did self-care, or hobbies, or some days, even work. Your life revolved around stopping this behavior before he became a tragic stereotype and left a black hole in your life. Damiano’s life revolved around Maneskin’s unrelenting schedule. 

He’d do anything to reclaim his autonomy, but the options were slim. The documents from Sony US hadn’t been translated with nuance and you wondered if that might void some of it. Hoped, really. He’d signed his life away to realize his dream. Now all he could do is show his handlers that they’d bought a faulty machine. In fact, he was self-destructive enough that he’d do it just to spite them. 

The first time Damiano was hospitalized with alcohol poisoning, you found about a dozen ways to reassure yourself that everything wasn’t falling apart. He’d been sober for two years so his tolerance was low. Damiano was probably drinking the same amount. Then you found out it’d been hard alcohol, no mixers. Now the excuses were he didn’t remember when to stop. He had to relearn how to self regulate when drinking. 

Ethan had been the one to call the first time, when they’d managed to contain it. The second it was his head of security, Ronnie. In a totally normal and healthy way, you combed through Twitter for an hour. The knot in your stomach said the news would break and it did. Splashed across tabloids was a haggard looking picture of Dami that you tried to date based on his outfit. Your therapist called your behavior “obsessive,” but followed it up with a surprising amount of empathy.

“Tough love can be equally painful on both sides.” You’d never told her you still loved him. It was obvious. For the first time, carrying around all Damiano’s secrets felt like a burden. You’d never betray his confidence, despite how poisonous he’d been towards the end. SME had you sign a non-disclosure agreement in early 2021. You’d insisted it wasn’t necessary, that there wasn’t enough money in the world to pay you to talk to the press. Sony had simply said, “for now,” prompting Dami’s stereotypically Italian temper to flare.

Ronnie was more concerned with you telling Damiano that he’d relayed this information, clearly against your ex-boyfriend’s wishes. 

“Be honest with me, are you breaching contract by calling me?” There’s a very long sign on the other end of the line.

“Technically, no. He hasn’t taken you off his emergency contacts. I’m more concerned about the disruption it would cause.”

“Disruption?”

“Explosion. Whatever he’s ingesting has made him volatile, constantly on edge. The edge of rage, that is. We’ve stopped hoping for good days and started hoping for some good hours every few days, ideally around showtime or interviews.” 

“Wow, okay. I know he has a temper –”

“He’s never not angry. It's always simmering under the surface.” Through the silence, you can hear the sounds of the hospital. Layers of anxious voices and the constant beeping of some machine.

“You didn’t do this.”

“I know,” you respond automatically.

“Y/n, you didn’t do this. He did this to himself.” Dami had violated boundary after boundary as you set them. He became less recognisable, until he wasn’t the person you fell in love with. Full of creativity, light, good humor, who loved art and comradery more than he did any substance.

“I mean, I don’t think the breakup is why he’s so angry. The depression is probably from the alcohol. That’s actually why I’m calling.” Ronnie has the same tone of voice as those who are “checking in.” “The decision has been made, that he’s going to rehab.”

“Good.” With your back braced against the wall, you slide down onto the floor with relief.

“That decision has been made without Damiano’s consent.”

“Can’t you consult him?”

“No,” Ronnie says firmly. “Addicts aren’t rational.” It was the first time you’d heard someone call Dami an addict. Before now, that word had only existed in your own head.

“I can’t believe it got to this point so quickly.” Your cat, Princess, senses your anxiety and rubs against you. Dami had picked her out as a tiny kitten. When would she start wondering where her dad was? Maybe not yet, he was gone for long stretches of time on tour. Princess doesn’t know he isn’t coming home, and that thought both makes you jealous and sob hysterically. 

“Y/n? Y/n? You still there?”

“Yeah, sorry,” you sniff, eyes burning.

“SME is using the full weight of its influence to force Dami into rehab. He might call you and say anything he can think of to get out of it. Don’t believe him. You can’t trust him right now.” The thought of Dami calling and begging you to fly him home, only to go on a bender makes you sick.

“Should I block his number and Whatsapp?”

“That's up to you.”

“You called to tell me it's up to me?”

“I called you to warn you. So you could steal yourself. So you’d know about it before the tabloids.”

“I suppose now that Dami’s hospitalization is public, someone is also gonna leak that he’s going to rehab. Cover their own asses?” Ronnie falls silent. “You know, going to rehab in privacy would be a fuck load more effective. Let them wonder.”

“I wish they would.” Here was the impasse you always reached. Damiano treated as a doll to be flung around for profit, as if he didn’t have a soul. 

“Fine. Thanks for calling me.” Each time, you tried to tell them not to update you in the future, and each time your tongue refused to form the words.

“Y/n, I have a feeling that something is really not right with him. That it could get much worse before it gets better.” Now, he’s managed to tick you off.

“Ronnie, I tried everything in my goddamn power to keep him from crashing and burning. More than anyone else! I devoted hours to –”

“Y/n, I know.”

“I couldn’t stop him from self-destructing. I tried!” The sound of tears creeps into your voice. “I couldn’t stand to watch it anymore. I don’t know if he was refusing to get better or was unable to, but either way I…tried.”

“No one questions that. I mean that Damiano might need for things to get worse for them to eventually get better. He’s stubborn and short-sighted. I want you to be ready.”

“How much worse?” you whisper.

“He might need to bruise his ass on rock bottom to stop idealizing self-destruction.”

“‘Live fast, die young’ sounds a lot like I’d rather stick it to the man than grow old with you. My ego is bigger than my love for you”

“I don’t know that that’s true, y/n. For some people it's a matter of time before they become addicts when they’re put into this pressure cooker. I’ve seen it before.

“And?”

“Only Damiano can pull himself out of it.”

“So I just wasted my time,” you respond bitterly.

“Showing Damiano how deeply and unequivocally you loved him might save him still.”

“I thought he had to save himself.”

“You’re telling me that after five years he’s not a part of you and vice versa?”

“No.” No, I’m not telling you that, because I know the opposite to be true so viscerally that it has almost destroyed me. The part of Damiano that lay in your heart should be withering in his absence, but it remained very much alive. How do you move on from someone you hadn’t broken up with? The version of Dami that caused you to end it wasn’t truly representative of his character. He was still in there, progressively buried under the rubble of this revolt. The man you loved was unreachable which also made it impossible to move on. Every day he held you in his hellish limbo. 

Damiano did his 30 days. Then 30 hours after discharge, he overdosed in Milan. You started buying a train ticket as soon as you saw Ronnie’s contact on the screen. 

“Is he alive?” 

“Yes, but he’s on a ventilator.”

“God damn it Dami,” you whimper, doubled over and on the verge of screaming into your hand. “What's happening?”

“That's literally all I know. Someone found him in the bathroom of a bougie nightclub and gave him Narcan, thank god. His lips were purple, so…” For a moment Ronnie’s voice is drowned out by a sob. “It’s gonna be messy. The ambulance was photographed.”

“Christ.” This would make international celebrity news. Every asshole who’d typecast Dam after Eurovision would be competing for the most public validation. 

“We don’t think it was intentional.”

“But how bad was it? Like would he think he was gonna die in the moment? Was he alone? How long was he conscious? What – what about organ failure. What if –”

“Y/n, I don’t know,” Ronnie says slowly. “I will call when I have more information.” You’d been on the train for 20 minutes before your phone rang. He was going to be okay. You balled up your coat and screamed, using it as a gag.

“Turns out, to compensate for the hangovers, he’s been doing cocaine.” Never has irony been more painful. “He wasn’t testing his drugs. The coke was laced with fentanyl. Another line might have killed him.” Only then does the possibility that Damiano could end his own life become apparent. It swallows up every other aspect of your reality, until you’re standing in the doorway of his hospital room. 

Thomas’ girlfriend Mia sees you first and runs in for a hug. Ethan and Vic were sleeping in their hotel rooms. Ronnie’s jacket is crumpled in a chair, forgotten after drifting off to sleep probably.

“Hey! Ronnie said you might come, but…” But I’m not Damia’s girlfriend. Perhaps he’d found someone new, and you were encroaching on their territory.

“Shit, I just thought that, um…is he dating –”

“No.” The amount of relief that provided was just evidence of how damaged you were. “He’s been in a coma for almost three hours, lots of good brain activity. He should wake up soon.”

“Coma?” you squeaked. In Tom’s eyes you saw how taxing this new Damiano had been. You weren’t the only one that loved him unconditionally. 

“Yeah.” Thomas rubs his face and sighs. “Fuck. We have so much shit tomorrow.” SME had scheduled a press tour as soon as Damiano was discharged, to make up for lost time. Everything was pushed back because the band couldn’t release something they hadn’t done publicity for.

“I’ll sit with him for a while,” you reassure. Mia helps Tom up out of the chair. After exchanging appropriate greetings, they exit the room, whose door remains open. Now you had to look at him. The ventilator emits rhythmic rushes of air, so your eyes find the source of the sound first. Then you follow the tubing until it enters Damiano. He’s gray, sickly looking like he had COVID again. Surely they already tested for that. 

The concern had been damaging his voice, like the tobacco and weed hadn’t already put his vocal chords on the edge of irreversible harm. How damaging is a plastic tube shoved down your throat? Alcohol caused esophageal cancer and coke eviscerated your sinuses. What would those do to his singing voice? 

You’d refrained from watching his gigs, but now you have the compulsion to find a video of this morning’s interview. It was just the talking portion, no performance. That was Sony’s idea of easing back into the public’s eye. In the thumbnail, he doesn’t look like an addict. Damiano’s skin had aged backwards while in rehab. He was beautiful, pale from so much time in doors, but healthy. The fact that he’d managed so much damage in a matter of hours made you nauseous. 

You sat in the bathroom while the feeling passed. The pale green tiles were cold. Should you leave? You couldn’t even work up the bravery to touch him. But if you left, Dami could wake up alone with a tube down his throat, confused that he wasn’t dead. Meanwhile, the fluorescent lights illuminate details in the reflection of the mirror that you’d prefer not to be made aware of. After pondering some adult acne, you decide that you aren’t the type of person to abandon someone, just because they abandoned you.

Upon exiting the bathroom, you startle the nurse at Damiano’s bedside.

“Geez, I didn’t know you were in there!” She brings a hand to her ample bosom while taking a deep breath.

“Shit, sorry. I was just…having an existential crisis.”

“Ah, so you must be the girlfriend, then.”

“Yep,” you answer automatically. After five years, that response was ingrained into your frontal lobe. This would have been the first time you answered no.

“I’m Maria and I’m gonna be your nurse this morning.”

“Morning?”

“It is…” she checks her smart watch, “5:04. So early morning.” Her chipper tone gives you cognitive dissonance. “I’m just gonna take some blood, just to monitor how his organs are functioning. Unfortunately a tiny amount of fentanyl can wreak havoc.” 

“His organs are failing?”

“No,” she answers firmly, going so far as to round the bed and pat you on the shoulder before putting on latex gloves. “He’s young and it's his first OD. He could bounce back quickly, but a coma is the body's last ditch effort at keeping itself alive. He’s lucky.” She gives you a knowing look. “I can recommend some great treatment programs, now that he officially has his Substance Use Disorder diagnosis.”

“Um.”

“Maybe we’ll tackle that around breakfast time. Now why don’t you hold onto his hand.” She ties a purple tourniquet around his bicep on his left arm while you gingerly take a seat. “Mhm, go ahead,” she permits, completely oblivious to the war raging inside you.

“Does – does it help?” Your left hand quivers, half an inch above his, close enough to feel the heat.  For some reason, you expect Dami’s skin to be cold too, like a corpse. 

“It can be difficult to find a good vein after an overdose.”

“Are his veins damaged?”

“We didn’t find any evidence that he was using intravenously. Unfortunately hypoxia, A.K.A. oxygen deprivation, is a result of –”

“Will he have brain damage?”

“You’ll have to ask the doctor that question.” 

“Does Narcan hurt?”

“No, but he’ll probably have a headache.”

“Does overdosing on fentanyl hurt?”

“It’s heavily sedating.”

“Would he know that he was overdosing?”

“Depends on how experienced of a drug user he is.”

“I’m pretty positive that this is his first overdose.”

“Then probably not.”

“Would he be scared then?”

“You’d have to ask him.”

“Would he be afraid of dying?”

“Honey, hold his hand.” Maria pats you on the shoulder as you finally set your palm against Damiano’s. His skin is warm, as always, and he feels sturdy. The sensation of his hand in yours brings back so many memories that you’re fighting not to drown in them. It's strange, him not responding as you squeeze down. Dam loved to talk about marriage, how the ceremony would go, the reception. You’d debated matching rings. Now you watched the blue line of his heart rate on the beeping monitor.

“Okay, all done,” Maria announced, smoothing adhesive labels over vials of blood. “The doctor will be in shortly and – oh.” She freezes, then presses the call button.

“Is he okay?” Your heart falls from your chest to stomach, out your ass, and lands on the linoleum floor. 

“Yep, looks like he’s coming out of it, actually. Stand up,” Maria requests, pulling on your arm. “Make sure you’re in his line of sight. Waking up on life support can be quite disorienting.” Damiano’s face looks the same, but then his pupils move under his eyelids. You’re the first thing he’ll see and that pressure is impossible to bear. 

“I can’t! I’m so sorry.” You rub your eyes then stand up, grabbing your purse and overnight bag. Maria doesn’t protest. She lets you leave in a flurry of movement and tears, throwing the door open so forcefully that it hits the wall. Once outside of the hospital room, you immediately feel compelled to go back. Dami had never done anything to warrant being left alone at such a pivotal, terrifying moment. You knew with absolute certainty that if the roles were reversed, he’d have never left your side.

“Okay.” You take a deep breath upon re-entering the hospital room, holding Dami’s right hand in both of your own. “Okay, I’m here. What now?” 

“We wait,” Maria answers, as a doctor enters the room. There's the medication given, vitals taken, brain activity analyzed. The waves on the monitor become closer together, then more drastic. Medical personnel may be accustomed to it, but the rapid beeping elevates your anxiety.

“We’re bringing him up out of it gradually, so he doesn’t hurt himself,” narrates a young doctor. “Mr. David will have regained a level of consciousness by now. Probably thinks he’s dreaming.” How would a person not startle while waking up with a tube in their throat? It’d been almost three months since you’d last seen him, but if you thought about it that way, you’d just run. Instead, you imagine that you’re waking Damiano up from a bad dream, even though it was typically the other way around.

“Will he recognize your voice?”

“Of course.” The response comes out defensive when you didn’t intend it to be.

“Talk to him.”

“I…okay.” You lean down, getting closer to his ear. “Dami, it’s y/n. It’s y/n, I’m really here. It's me, baby.” That last word gets stuck in your throat. It’d be so long. How many messages had you missed? He must have tried to contact you.

“I’m sorry, I haven’t answered. I don’t know the right things to say. I don’t know if saying something is the right thing.” Maria and the other nurse in the room are looking at you with a bit of judgment, but the doctor is focused on the monitors.

“Great. That’s great.” You raise a shaky hand to Damiano’s cheek and brush your thumb back and forth.

“As soon as I heard, I got on a train. I still think about you everyday, even more than when we were together. Hopefully you won’t remember any of this, me babbling on. I’d call it pathetic, but you wouldn’t like that.”

“Page whatever respiratory therapist is on call this morning, please. Thank you.” For another couple minutes you wait for improvement, signs that your boyfriend still existed in this body. The doctor is enthralled in what appears to be unchanging information to you, and administers another dose of something. 

“I always thought it was kind of sudden,” you confess. “Damia, if you can hear me, come towards the surface.”

“He can definitely hear you. I’m Dr. Williams, by the way, or just Paul.” The young physician never breaks focus. “Common misconception. If waking up from sleep isn’t instant, why would waking up from a coma be,” he chuckles. Damiano’s hand twitches at the wrist, like a muscle spasm.

“He just moved!”

“Mm-hm.”

“Is everything okay?” Ethan exclaims, having walked in while all your focus was elsewhere. Someone herds him into the hall and closes the door. Then Dami squeezes down on your hand, properly, like he intends to. His eyes flutter and you feel his presence enter the room.

Notes: Chapter 2 posted on Sunday. Let me know if you find this fic interesting/compelling so far. I'll be posting two short chapters a week, word count ranging from 2.9 - 7.3k. Hello to the new members of my taglist!

-XOXO Eden

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[lucywritesreid]

With Heaven Above You - Part 2

Summary: In this chapter, Reid and Y/N are coming closer to uncovering who the unsub is.

Warnings: Just a bit of swearing!

Word Count: 2.6k (I was going to split this into two but ended up changing my mind!)

Notes: Thank you for the feedback on part one! I’m tagging @rexorangecouny  @yeah-just-ignore-me-thanks  @liaabsurd @reidsmyhusband-emilysmymistress @101donuts

The next 24 hours or so flew by. You and Spencer had spent hours crafting the profile and accumulating evidence passed on by the rest of their teams whilst they investigated the murders. Hotch had accepted your revised profile and a comment about it being ‘especially good work’ had lifted both your spirits more than you cared to admit. By the evening, there had been no reports of any new missing persons, so you took the time to deliver the profile to various police departments and blue collar workers in the local area. The more people knew what to look out for, you hoped the more vigilant and safe people would be.

There was something powerful about delivering the profile together. On a couple of occasions a few male officers had directed questions specifically to Dr Reid. Spencer had sharply referred them to you and he stood watching you proudly as you answered. Despite his greater intelligence and experience within the FBI, he never took you for granted. He wanted people to see just how smart you were. Had the circumstances been happier, you probably would’ve wanted to go out and celebrate your partnership, or at the very least have a romantic evening indoors. But this case was unrelenting.

There had been a minor breakthrough. Garcia had been given permission from the phone companies each of the victims used to have unlimited access to their phones. Their phones had been brought into the office and she’d found out that each victim received a photograph of themselves from an unknown number in the hours before their disappearance. She was trying to find the source of the number, but it gave you all some hope that should you be taken – the unsub would try and track you down and photograph you first.

By the time you returned to Quantico, it was late, but you needed to work on the press release with Rossi and JJ. Spencer excused himself to go look through some files, and you spent the next few hours working through questions and specific trigger words you were going to use in order to taunt the unsub. “I think you’ve got this kiddo,” Rossi brought you in for a warm hug, “you’re gonna go out there and really wind up the bastard.”

It got to a point when you felt like you couldn’t stand up any longer. Tears stung your eyes as the battle to fight off a yawn was lost. Glancing down at your watch you saw that it was almost midnight. “I’m gonna go find the Dr, I’ll see you guys in the morning.” You kissed both your colleagues on the cheek and grabbed your coat from your desk, anxious to get home and try and get some sleep before tomorrow.

It was no surprise how you found Spencer. He was sprawled out across a small office’s burgundy carpet, an array of open files and photographs positioned sporadically around him. You stood for a few seconds and watched him, always fascinated by his approach. He was feverishly reading through files, using his index finger to focus his eyes on the pages as he read through them all at lightning speed. Most people would believe that this workspace was chaotic and messy. But you could see Spencer’s organisation even from your viewpoint. He’d arranged the victims chronologically in his circle and had layered over police and ME reports in between each case file. He truly was brilliant. Had it have been a few hours earlier; you wouldn’t have interrupted. But you knew he needed to go home, probably more than you did. “C’mon Spence. Even someone as handsome as you needs their beauty sleep,” you commented, leaning against the door.

He didn’t look up but he knew you were there. “Five minutes, y/n?”

“M’kay squish,” a nickname you reserved for when there was nobody else around, “I’ll go warm the car up.”

Spencer was five minutes on the dot. He hurried into the passenger seat and clicked on his seatbelt, throwing his messenger bag on the backseat. You looked in the rear-view mirror and saw that the bag was overflowing and stuffed with files, no doubt all the ones he was staring at in the office. It took all your willpower not to mention it. You desperately wanted to tell him to forget it for tonight and have a relax, but that would be futile. Spencer was passionate about his job and that was one of the many reasons why you were in love with him. The radio played classical music all the way home, Spencer’s favourite radio station and certainly not yours. He made a couple of comments about various composers playing and facts about their lives. It made you relax to hear him talk about something that wasn’t the case.

When you arrived home, you were seeing spots from exhaustion. Too tired to cook anything, Spencer warmed up some leftover Chinese food whilst you jumped in the shower. You popped on an old episode of Doctor Who and sat in silence as you both ate. When the episode finished, you glanced across the sofa and saw Spencer with his head propped up by his hand and his empty bowl falling off his lap. As quietly as you could, you turned off the TV, reached out and took the bowl from his lap and set it down on the coffee table, hoping not to disturb him. But he was an awfully light sleeper and the slightest movement caused him to jolt awake. “Oh god sorry y/n I guess I fell asleep.” You scolded him for apologising, took his hand and walked into the bedroom. You were asleep the second your head hit the pillow.

The next morning was spent preparing for your press conference. You dressed quickly but made the effort to put on something slightly more revealing and spent the time straightening your usually messy up-in-a-bun hair. Spencer hovered in the doorway as you finished putting on your make up, hands in your pocket as he watched you. You sighed. “I think it’s the best way to try and bait this guy if I at least look worth kidnapping,” You watched him shudder behind you. “I know, y/n. And you look beautiful. I just don’t like the thought of him thinking that.”

On your way out, you made sure to grab the purple pendant necklace that Spencer had bought you on your birthday two years ago. You fumbled with it between your fingers as you sat in the car as your own little signal that you were going to be thinking about him all day.

The press conference went off without a hitch. Thanks to JJ, there was wide media coverage, with cameras and crew from all various TV and radio news outlets, as well as a few reporters who had vouched to have the story printed on their websites within the hour. If this guy had any sort of access to media, which your profile stated he did, he would most certainly be watching. “And just to reiterate, we’re looking for a man who is awkward with zero social skills. This man is impotent, unattractive and holds a menial job. He takes no pride in his appearance and we believe he is a complete loner. No family, no friends. You’ve probably overlooked this guy a thousand times. There is nothing, I repeat, nothing significant about him at all.” You stared right down into the camera as you delivered your last line. You knew that was the sucker punch. This guy was a total narcissist and completely fame hungry. You hoped that by saying he was a loner with no life he would be outraged enough to try and track you down. “We are also not answering to any nicknames. This man is too irrelevant to be given one. If you have any questions or believe you have seen this man, you can call our 24 hour tip line. You can ask for me personally. My name is Agent Y/N Y/L/N with the BAU. Thank you.”

As soon as you stepped down the phone lines started ringing. Local police and members of your team were all taking it in turns to answer the calls, writing down numbers, disregarding any hoaxes. Morgan cheered you up after ten minutes by claiming that someone was asking if you were free for dinner, but other than that there were no significant leads in the first few hours.

Spencer had asked Hotch if he could continue looking over the files and he had disappeared back into his quiet room. You considered going checking on him a few times, but then it was your turn to man the phones alongside Emily. An hour or so in, you turned to her and asked, “have you had anything worthwhile, Em? Do you think we’re gonna get this guy?”

“I think you did an excellent job before, y/n. I’m sure he’s seething. I was surprised though when he didn’t ring directly after the first few minutes.” You nodded back to her. That was the outcome that you had been hoping for, but it hadn’t materialised. “Say,” she then added, “what’s Reid so fixated on? Do you think he’s got any leads?”

“Honestly Em? I don’t have a clue.”

The day felt rather anti-climactic. You’d set yourself up, hoping for some sort of breakthrough, but as the evening wore on and the numbers of staff on site dwindled, you realised there wasn’t going to be any new developments tonight. Following the same routine from the day before, you found Spencer, and coaxed him out of his little investigation room so that he would come home. The rest of the evening was extremely ordinary. You went to bed together and fell asleep even quicker than the night before. If that was humanly possible.

When you awoke, it was early. A stream of light from the slightly open curtains had interrupted your sleep. “We really should’ve shut the curtains properly,” you yawned and stretched a hand out to where you expected your boyfriends warm chest to be. But his side of the bed was empty. You opened your eyes and turned to his side. It was perfectly made up and his pyjamas were folded nearly on top of the pillow. That was odd. You both were notoriously messy and known for not being particularly proactive in a morning. Perhaps he hadn’t slept. You wondered just how early he’d got out of bed.

When you finally managed to come around you checked your phone to see if he’d sent you anything. Aside from a few late night memes from Garcia, there was nothing. Still, Spencer had gone to work on his own plenty times before. He liked to let you sleep in when his insomnia was bothering him. He’d probably just used his metro card and wanted to make a start on the case. That gave you hope that maybe his incessant thinking had given him a eureka moment.

You rolled out of bed slowly and stretched to stand. It would’ve been nice to go back to sleep for a few hours, but you figured if Spencer was already at work it was likely the others were too. You threw on a plain black shirt and capri trousers and added one of Spencer’s fluffy cardigans to finish it off. You liked the way you could fit your thumbs through the holes in the sleeves, almost like he was holding your hand. As you walked into the kitchen you shot him a quick text ‘see you at work babe.’ You turned on the coffee machine and figured you’d use one of Spencer’s mugs rather than dirtying a new one. He always had a coffee before he left, no matter how much of a rush he was in. And he always left a mug on the counter. It was usually the one with penguins on you’d got him at the Christmas market.

But there was no mug there. That stumped you for a second or two. He always had his coffee before he left, no exceptions. Then again, this case was doing crazy things to all of you. Surely it wasn’t unusual for one day? You poured two coffees into metal flasks to take with you and made your way to the front door. You reached up to grab your key from the right hook but it was empty. Huh. That was weird too. You quickly scanned your eyes and saw your key was on the left. But your key was always on the right and Spencer’s on the left. Had he picked yours up by mistake and swapped them over before leaving? That didn’t really make sense.

You had to shrug this off. It was getting silly, this overthinking. Save your energy for the case you said to yourself. Just as you were about to unlock the door, you looked down at your ‘enter the upside down’ door mat. Normally it sat perfectly on a right angle to the edge of the door. But it was almost completely twisted to the left. How had that happened? Why was Spencer in such a rush that he forgot his coffee, almost took the wrong key and messed up the doormat?

The ride to work seemed long. You were anxious to see Spencer and have the butterflies in your stomach go away. Guilt set in as you realised you were the last one to arrive, even though it was only just after 8am. You went straight for JJ who was stood by your desk. “Morning JJ,” you mustered a smile.

She returned the smile but looked around you, “Did Spence not come in with you this morning?” You shook your head. Shit. Did that mean he wasn’t here yet? By the time you had got ready and drove here the metro would’ve brought him in by now. “Um no, I thought he was already here…” The panic started settling in again and you frantically looked around the bullpen. “Where is he?”

You excused yourself from JJ but she followed, obviously sensing how tense you were. You tried the meeting room, Garcia’s den, the little cubby room he’d been working with, even Hotch’s office. When you asked Derek if he’d go into the bathroom to look for him, he said, “Listen baby girl, if you want to get your kicks off with Reid in working hours, I’d suggest somewhere more romantic than the men’s bathroom…”

JJ gave him a look, “We can’t find Spencer actually, Derek. But I’m sure he’s just on his way, y/n. I wouldn’t worry about it. Have you heard from him yet?” She reached out to touch your arm, but you flinched away. This wasn’t right. His oddly made up bed. The coffee cup. The keys. The doormat. It was all pointing to something, but you just didn’t know what.

Without hesitation you ran into Garcia’s room and startled her. “Penelope,” you said trying to choke back tears, “I-I need you to trace Spencer’s phone for me.”

She didn’t question you just from the look on her face. Instead she nodded and set to work. You tried to focus on your breathing, but it was becoming shallower by the second. A sharp pain crept up into your chest and you balled your hand into a tight fist. He’s okay. He’s probably just gone somewhere to think. Or he’s late. That happens.

Your train of thought was quickly interrupted by Garcia. She spun round on her chair and the same worried look you had was staring back at you. “Y/n, h-his phone’s either switched off or died. I-I can’t locate him. I don’t know where he is.”

End of part 2

[trainsinanime]

Here’s a Miraculous Ladybug story idea that I may write some time, but probably not, because I only really care about chapter two of what would probably need to be at least ten.

Chapter one features Lila going after Marinette full-force. Not the weak boring „she rips up her notebook so hard that Marinette has to move to Gotham“ crap. We’re doing this properly: Lila convinces the Mayor that Marinette is planning to resurrect Napoleon and bring him back to power. So the Mayor has Marinette imprisoned without trial, because apparently he can do that in the Miraculous universe, and not even her friends or family know what’s going on.

Chapter 3 and later will detail how Marinette managed to escape the prison after fourteen years, with the help of a professional hypnotist. She discovers a pirate treasure on a small uninhabited island off the coast of Italy. With the money from the treasure, she buys the island and the title of nobility that comes with it, and returns to Paris. Rich, and now officially a countess, she will reward those who were loyal to her, and destroy all her enemies. (I haven’t yet worked out what that means in detail.)

But the really interesting part for me is what happens in those fourteen years. Here are my notes. Content warning: Dark, Major Character Death, Intended as over-the-top and silly but maybe not over-the-top enough, and of course, Adrien/Lila:

With Marinette gone, a lot of joy drops from the class immediately. Everybody loves her, and they only have weird rumours about what happened to her, rumours that they can’t believe even if the source is Lila. (No, we’re not doing class salt. Yes, that means my options for enemies in the later chapters are limited. I don’t care, I love Alya and the rest of the class and I am not throwing them under the bus.)

The first time Ladybug doesn’t appear to a fight, everybody is pissed. The second time, they’re even more pissed. The third time, they’re worried.

Chat Noir does his best. He decides to capture the Akumas, so Ladybug can cleanse them when she returns. For now, he stores them in mason jars. After a bit of thought, he decided to just store them in the cellar of the mansion, in a box labelled „Adrien’s favourite toys“. Nobody ever looks there.

No Ladybug means no cleanup. (The ear rings are kept in the warden’s office in Marinette’s prison, so Ladybug is out of commission for fourteen years). Adrien again tries to help, spending way too much time cataclysming debris. A child has lost their favourite plush shark in a river of chocolate? Chat Noir manages to „find“ and „clean“ it. No, it’s totally the same shark, not a new one that he just bought, believe me. The child is happy, but clearly it’s not enough.

The first time the Eiffel Tower is destroyed, rebuilding it is a matter of national pride. If Ladybug is gone, then France will step in. Gabriel donates a lot to the effort.

The second time the Eiffel Tower is destroyed, authorities decide to leave the debris as a monument. The statue for Ladybug disappears.

With no Ladybug, Hawkmoth realises that he can’t get the ear rings. Attacks decrease, to once a month, then once every three months; apparently just to check whether Ladybug has returned. Around Adrien’s eighteenth birthday, it seems like Hawkmoth might retire for good. On a completely unrelated note, Gabriel appears to have lost all will to live.

Adrien can’t escape Lila, who continues to be employed by Gabriel, despite her not being very good at photoshoots. But he does his best to keep his distance.

Shortly after Adrien’s birthday, he is away, while Lila has a meeting with Gabriel and Nathalie. But tragedy strikes: Lila arrives and witnesses Gabriel shooting Nathalie and then himself. Why would he do such a thing? Good thing Lila is such a reliable witness. The case is so clear that the police don’t even have to check the gun for fingerprints.

Adrien is stricken with grief. He tries to call his friends, but nobody will reply. It’s almost as if someone with access to Gabriel’s computer had used the spy software on Adrien’s phone to disable it. But that’s clearly absurd. There is only one other person who is there to comfort him: Lila. Adrien doesn’t like her, but she is someone familiar. She spends the night.

The next morning, Adrien is disgusted, and the two part ways. But two months later, she reappears and tells him she is pregnant and it’s his child. She has a whole speech prepared about how he needs to take responsibility, but it’s not necessary: Adrien will not let his child grow up without a father.

The next month, the wedding is a weird affair. Lila wanted something grandiose, and she got it. But all their friends know that this is anything but true love.

Alix wonders aloud what Marinette’s role would have been if she had been here. Alya jokingly says that she’d be the bride. Adrien overhears, and he realises: Yeah, she would have been. He loves her. Always had. This moment is when the only wedding picture is taken where Adrien smiles.

Seven months later, Gabriel Agreste Junior is born. Adrien loves his son with all his heart, but he has questions. But Lila and her top-notch expensive doctors assure him that this is perfectly normal, sometimes pregnancies take a month longer or two. Adrien is not fully convinced, but he doesn’t want to cause a fuss.

Around this time we also get a new Hawkmoth, who is much meaner, but doesn’t seem to have as clear a goal. Everybody’s best guess is that this Hawkmoth is just going after whoever last pissed them off. (Totally forgot this one in the original version of the post, sorry)

Two years later, Lila’s daughter Emma Marinette Agreste Junior is born. Adrien picked the second name while Lila was asleep. Since Lila is not involved with her kid’s upbringing at all, she has not yet noticed. This time, Adrien is convinced that something is up and Lila is lying to him. The reason: He has recently learned how babies are made, and he knows for a fact that he never did that with Lila.

He confronts her. Lila isn’t concerned, though. What’s he going to do? Divorce her? Then he’s never going to see the kids again. The things she could make a court believe… Adrien is horrified by that thought, especially since he knows very well that he’s the only one in the marriage who loves these children.

Meanwhile, Lila’s own career as an actress isn’t going well. She’s a great natural talent, sure; she can make anyone believe anything. But to be a great actor, you still have to turn up on set every day, and not just when you feel like it. Oh, sure, she has great excuses, but the jobs still dry up fast. And while you can make up a story that makes you look good about one make-up artist you made cry, maybe two, there is a point where it becomes a problem.

She blames Adrien for this, mostly because he will generally not back up her lies about where she was. He doesn’t really care, though. Despite her threats, what’s she gonna do, leave with the kids? Thanks to his father, Adrien had some top notch lawyers, and the pre-nup agreement is watertight.

Unrelated to all this, behold Paris’s new mayor, Chloé Burgeois. She’s been embroiled in controversy from day one. Some say she’s too young. Others say she only got the job because her father was mayor before her. Yet others point to her publicly difficult relation with her constant partner and off-again-on-again girlfriend Sabrina. But perhaps the biggest talking point is that in her office, she has a big painting of a certain heroine in red with spots, with the words, „what would Ladybug do?“ underneath. She’s never lost trust, and the press hates her for it.

One day, her old school friend Alya visits. Alya’s own relationship to Ladybug is difficult: Part of her still holds out hope, just like Chat Noir. Another part of her curses Ladybug for just leaving. Her goal now is completely unrelated to Ladybug, though. She has uncovered new things about the Napoleon Resurrection Conspiracy: The main witness (Lila) and the supposed ring-leader: Marinette. That can’t be right.

She wants Chloé to reveal the truth. Chloé herself has no idea, and very little interest in investigating. Her father told her that this was all secret, and that she should never touch this subject.

But she knows very well what Alya is asking for here. Alya got her big break as a journalist by uncovering the files on the Napoleon Resurrection Conspiracy in the first place. The revelation that it had all been swept under the rug was what caused the old Mayor to step down in the first place. If Alya is now saying that this might all be wrong, that means she’s placing her whole career on the line. That level of commitment means something.

For her own part, it took Chloé a while to admit it, but she was shocked and heartbroken by Marinette’s sudden disappearance as well. It was the first step to becoming a somewhat nicer person, and forming real bonds with her classmates. She has the access to the archives. She could uncover the truth, and maybe even find out where Marinette is now. It wouldn’t be popular, and it might be dangerous… but what would Ladybug do?

Chloé is all in, and it doesn’t take long until she meets Lila. Chloé would not consider herself a fan. She knows the difference between Adrien’s real and fake smiles. Lila refuses to clear things up, though. Instead, she tells Chloé that the french secret service does not allow her to say anything, and that Chloé better drop it if she knows what’s good for her.

Chloé ignores it. She also ignores it when she gets a threatening letter. After all, Ladybug was up against powerful people, too, and she never let that stop her. She even ignores when her own personal Yacht sinks for unexplained reasons, until her Butler and Sabrina explain to her some things about the history of the french secret service (actually I’m not sure whether this is too much in bad taste; the alternative would be that her vacation home gets set on fire).

She tells Alya that there is nothing to know, and blocks her cell phone number. The next day, workers remove the Ladybug painting. After all, what Ladybug would do is just disappear, right? Only fitting. Sabrina laughs a little too artificially at the joke. Yes, indeed. Ladybug would just stop doing her job when the people needed her. Perfect analogy.

With that, the basic outline is set. Chapter three would probably be short and tell the story of Marinette’s imprisonment. Chapter four is then where the real revenge starts.

Other points:

At various points, Luka is sadly strumming his guitar.

I’m not sure what to do about Marinette’s parents. The mean option is that they die, full of grief over their missing daughter. The very mean option is that they end up separating first. I’m not sure Marinette’s revenge spree works if they’re still around, and I definitely don’t ever see them turning away from her.

Nino and Kagami could do with an arc here.

Anyway, I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about this, but since I don’t know how to turn this into a full story, this is as good as it gets. If any of you guys want to borrow parts or all of it for your stories, please go ahead.

[ihatetaxes99]

THE YAKUZA AND THE PHOENIX - A BOKU NO HERO ACADEMIA FANFICTION

"See, the problem with people like you," Commented the cool, sanitised yet utterly terrifying voice of Kai Chisaki as he kneeled down just in the very corner of the hero's peripheral vision. "Is that you relied far too much on that disgusting disease that plagues every last vein in your Godforsaken body. Maybe if you had just thought ahead a little… Has this illness robbed you of your senses, too? Left you as useless as a newborn? Not that it matters. It's far too late by now for any part of you to begin thinking about what could have been. I mean, just take a look around." He raised one hand to adjust his mask, while using the other to gesture to the scene around the two, one filled with flame and destruction. "If you had thought to bring police, tried to corner me with rifles, well you might have had some sort of success. I'm not stupid enough to resist against live bullets. But no. Your sickening Quirk has left you with such delusions that you thought you could stand to take me on alone."

The young woman's eyes filled with nothing but pure steel as she looked up at him. There was no fear to be found in the glare she delivered the man known as Overhaul, in spite of the terror bubbling in the pits of her stomach, constantly threatening to rise to the top. But she would not let it. Not in front of this Chisaki bastard, she wouldn't give him the satisfaction of knowing he had won.

"No words?" The man sighed, poking her lightly in the head as if to provoke a reaction. "Like a kid who doesn't get their way. Stubborn to the end. What a pain you are. The worst kinds of people are the ones who don't realize they're infected. They have no true redemption in their future. It's kind of weird when you think about it. What a shame… Not that it's any of my concern. I'm more interested in just why you and your ridiculous headgear have been following me around all day. Do you have an answer for that?" He grabbed her by the back of the hair, and pulled her face up to look at his. "I'd prefer an answer as soon as possible, so I can minimise the amount of contact made with your disgusting body."

There was only one way the woman knew she could respond to this and that way landed directly on the suspected Yakuza's forehead. "Why would I tell you anything, asshole? You won't get anything out of the Phoenix."

The man actually audibly growled, like a feral wolf, as he slammed her head into the asphalt. She felt her nose break as blood streamed from it onto the road. It was probably one of the lesser injuries she had incurred that day. Chisaki got to his feet and produced a spotless handkerchief from his pocket, wiping his face of the hero's saliva. "How childish." His voice was full of pure, deep contempt. "How filthy. Were you never taught manners? Are you mentally deficient? Hmph. Not that I should expect any more from a hero who calls themselves the Phoenix. How cliché." With that, he returned to his kneeling position over her limp body, she practically felt his shadow drop over her as the smell of burning embers filled her nose. Were those sirens she heard? They were faint, but what else could they be? Were they coming in her direction? One ear was completely busted up, so she couldn't tell. Looking up to the man who supposedly went by Overhaul, her peripheral vision severely limited by her complete and total lack of a right eye, she found her mind drifting away to the beginning of the day. When things had seemed oh so simple. When she still had all her limbs and when life had generally been more preferable when contrasted against her current predicament.

When had it all gone so wrong?

---------------------

"So, all I have to do is follow the bugger?" Twenty-three year old Misa Kawajiri enquired into her phone as she took small, meticulous sips from her large Coke, sitting atop a rooftop in the very heart of the city, occasionally reaching into the bag next to her to dig out a fry or two and jam them into her mouth. This was the life, no doubt about it. The young woman, who went by the heroic moniker of the Phoenix, was elated whenever she was sent on surveillance patrols by her agency. Most other pro heroes would consider such work to be beneath them, it mostly consisted of hounding tax evaders, low-rent rank-and-file grunts and conmen, there was almost certainly never a tang of excitement to be found. This was the reason most heroes preferred more interesting work and it was the reason why Kawajiri adored such jobs. For her, it was a chance to slow down, chill out and enjoy life at a bit of a slower pace than usual. She definitely was not above having time to unwind and take things at a more reasonable pace. Of course, today's surveillance was already beginning to sound more interesting. It had started out with monitoring some basement-dwelling Otaku who shared anti-hero sentiments on internet forums, so not exactly a thrill ride there, as evidenced by the fact that Misa had left halfway through to get herself a McDonald's. But her new target, as assigned to her by her employers at the agency…

"His name's Kai Chisaki." Rang the cool, clerical voice of Phoenix's supervisor. "Mid to late twenties, germaphobe. He isn't often seen out and about, instead residing largely in the Shie Hassaikai's compound."

"Hassaiaki?" The hero of the sky's ears perked up at that. "He's Yakuza?"

"As far as we know, yes. We can't trace back any records of a family, except for Kazama Chisaki, his uncle, who was also associated with the organization before his death, although not as a full member."

"Interesting…" The girl pondered. "So, why are we following him, then? The Hassaikai have a good reputation, right?" Her words were slightly muffled as she jammed more fries in her mouth at that moment than was probably reasonable.

"That they do, Phoenix. They're underground. There have been search warrants on the premises before, but nothing suspicious was turned up. They're a Yakuza group in name only right now, nothing worth worrying about. But Chisaki? He's different. You're going to be following him for reasons unrelated to his activity within the clan."

"Oh?" Misa cupped her free ear with her hand so that she could better hear the man on the other end of the phone.

"In short, we have reasons to believe he's been peddling Trigger behind the backs of his bosses. Obviously, I don't need to tell you about that."

She nodded, although that was a tad redundant, considering the voice on the other end could not see her. The experimental drug known for its Quirk-bolstering properties was nothing to trifle with, and it had only grown more popular in recent time. "Why do you think he's doing so?"

"Money, probably. Who knows with these criminal types? The point remains that we have reason to believe he's out and about today. I've sent you an image of him on your phone. Follow him, see what he's up to. When a hermit like him comes out of the woodwork, it can never be good. Not for anybody." And with that, her superior hung up, leaving Misa to her own thoughts. In being left this way, she dug her knees up tucked under her chin and sulked for a bit, confident that nobody could see her act in such a childish manner, taking the odd glance at the image. He was a shockingly handsome young fellow, with sharp yellow eyes, ruffled brown hair and a suit, he looked the part of any well-meaning businessman. The only weird aspect was the steampunk-esque plague doctor mask clamped around his mouth. She shrugged it off as probably having something to do with his Quirk, whatever that was.

"This sucks." She groaned as she reached for her helmet, which mostly served as a fancy shell to hold the visor that shielded her eyes from the wind. "I don't wanna have to pursue Yakuza drug dealers, it's just no good. Give me a fat, tinfoil hat loser ranting about conspiracies any day. Surveillance is supposed to be a break from the hard stuff. But nooo, it just has to be more of it, doesn't it?" She sighed, the air whistling over her lips, as she tossed aside her empty bag. Stretching upwards, allowing her skintight suit to hug her body, she felt her wings extend from her body. It was always a glorious sensation to be felt, the pure rush of it all. She adored it beyond belief, the best part of the job. With a cheeky grin, the young hero spread her arms…

… And let herself fall from the building's roof.

---------------------

Filthy. The very lot of them, surrounded by filth and dirt and all manner of unpleasantries. It was enough to break young Kai Chisaki out in hives, it truly was. Absolutely repulsive. How horrendous to have to walk amongst the common people, all of them no doubt inflicted with that despicable illness. As he made his way down the crowded high street, bumping into the occasional commuter, he felt the irresistible urge to lift up the sleeve of his green coat and scratch at the lumps on his arm. Urgh. The very lot of them, disgusting. He was rapidly remembering why he vastly preferred to remain indoors. And yet, he had to do this. He couldn't entrust mere goons with carrying out the mission, not even the Eight Precepts of Death. This had to be done by him and him alone. He felt the cold metal rub against his stomach from the inside pocket of his coat. What depraved things that guns were. Alas, they were a necessary evil, and still far better than Quirks. As he walked, he had no clue of the eyes following him as he did so. Misa Kawajiri worked fast and had found him in mere minutes. Was he aware of this, he would almost have applauded her.

Key word: Almost.

"He's carrying some sort of briefcase..." The girl noted to herself as she watched him. Luckily, his mask made him very distinctive for anyone who may be looking for him, so she had not had much trouble. "Is that relevant to whatever he's up to?" The questions were racing through her head in spite of her better judgement. She couldn't help but wonder about the good-looking, well-dressed young fellow with Yakuza ties. It was all so odd to her, and new. She didn't often run into anything so… exciting, was probably the word. And normally, Phoenix abhorred exciting. But something about it just seemed alluring. Maybe it was more the man than the danger, who really knew? Certainly not her.

…

DAMN.

Wrapped up in her own little thoughts, Kawajiri had lost Chisaki. He had seeped into the crowd. That wasn't good, not good at all. Not even wasting a second, Misa once again extended her wings and took off into the air, in search of the fellow she was shadowing. Stupid Misa, she cursed herself. How had she been so stupid? She really needed to focus more. Her eyes scanned the surroundings as she flew over an alleyway that served as a gap between two buildings.

And in that very alleyway, Kai Chisaki now stood, facing a triage. They were common street thugs, Overhaul had done his research. Nothing big, they were unheard of, just worthless druggies with not a thing to their names and a whole heap of desperation for power, power that they had no clue what to do with. In other words, the perfect suckers to lure in.

"Gentlemen." The distinguished Yakuza bowed. The goons showed no such respect in return. Was it really so hard to show the baseline politeness required of a person? These kinds of people pissed him off the most. Fortunately, the mask obstructed his grimace as he set the silver case on the ground and entered in a combination. A few seconds passed and then it clicked open. "Here's your bloody Trigger. Ten vials, enough to give the three of you a bolster in your path- In your Quirks for up to forty-eight hours. If you have any questions, I would advise you ask now."

The thugs all shared looks with one another. They appeared satisfied at the very least, yet the one in the middle, a big guy with muscles to rival All Might- Well, the former All Might- seemed incredulous to some degree. 

"So, what yer tellin' us, Chisaki-"

"I would prefer if you called me Overhaul."

"-Right. Sorry." His accent was just thick enough to get under the Yakuza's skin. "Yer sayin' that we don' hafta pay for any of this?"

To this, Kai shrugged. "Consider it a first-time buyer's guarantee. If you want more later down the line, that's when you'll have to start paying me. Otherwise, take it." He kicked the briefcase, sending it sliding towards the men. "It's all yours." For a moment, it seemed like the huge guy was about to protest, but at looking at the vials, his greed got the better of him, and he allowed a wide grin to overcome his face, no doubt imagining what his improved Quirk would be like. Disgusting animal.

"Pleasure doin' business with ya, Mr. Overhaul." He gloated as he picked up the case, his cronies hovering around him as they sneaked looks at the drug. Now was probably the best time to strike, while they were blinded by their own pathetic delusions of grandeur.

"Likewise." Chisaki responded, reaching into his coat, as if trying to find a cigarette. "Say, you three, have you ever wondered what society would be like without Quirks? How far we could have advanced by now if we hadn't had to restart everything to accommodate the idea of superpowers?" The men stared at him like he was mad, which was to be expected. "It's just something I've been thinking about." He admitted as he pulled the gun from his coat and aimed it squarely at the large man's head. "Let's test it out. You'll survive, of course."

"What the fuck?" The scumbag growled as he dropped the case in shock. "You pullin' a gun on us? Guess what, you skinny prick? It's three on one. Shoulda thought about that before pullin' a betrayal!"

"Probably." Kai noted nonchalantly as he took aim and fired.

The bullet ricocheted up against a wall in the alley as the metallic weapon was knocked from his hand by a kick. And not a kick from one of the steroided-up goons. No, one aimed from above.

"Looks like I caught you boys in the act." Phoenix grinned as she stood, legs firmly apart, eying up Kai. "Trying to betray the dudes you're selling drugs to really isn't a great idea, I must add." 

…

Filthy…

Sickening….

"WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE??!!" Kai Chisaki screamed, his voice carrying high up into the sky as he stared down the hero, his pupils small and mad in their sockets. "HOW DARE YOU TOUCH ME??!! HOW FUCKING DARE YOU??!!" He was completely enraged, sweat pouring from his forehead as he grasped at his hair. "DISGUSTING, DISGUSTING, DISGUSTING!!" He appeared to be on the receiving end of a full-on breakdown. All this over being kicked in the hand? No, it couldn't just be that. Already, the receivers of the Trigger had fled, stolen briefcase in hand. It really had been their lucky day.

"Woah, calm down, Chisaki-"

"Who gave you the right to call me that?!" He demanded, his voice slightly softer now. "And do you have any idea how difficult those bullets were to manufacture? I simply cannot afford to waste them!" Turning his back on Kawajiri, he picked up the gun, examining it for damages, and then wiped it clean with his white surgical gloves.

"Hey, creep! Stay right where you are!" Misa was petrified. She truly was. Something about this guy just was not right at all. She had been told he was a major germaphobe, but was it this bad? Enough to push him into insanity at a moment's touch? "You're under arrest for possession distribution of illegal narcotics." She was basically reading off the rulebook, saying what she was supposed to say in such situations. But nothing about this felt normal. Why was he so focused on the gun? "Stand down and await for police transport."

"You think I would heed such commands from a filthy piece of scum like yourself?" Suddenly, Kai was cool, clinical, yet again as he calmly pointed the gun in her direction. Phoenix nearly felt her heart stop. "Maybe you'll make a better test subject." His finger tightened on the trigger of the handgun. Misa had no time to think, no time to plan.

She simply ran forwards, charging the villain as he steadied his aim. Another loud bang echoed from the gun. She felt it tear her suit as it whizzed past her, but she managed to just barely evade it. Now, she was too full of adrenaline to stop, as she ploughed towards Chisaki. As she drew closer, she reached out, grabbing for his arm… She had to restrain him and fast.

"DON'T LAY YOUR FILTH-ENCRUSTED FINGERS ON ME FOR EVEN A SECOND!!" Overhaul yelled, back to unconcealed rage, as he slammed his hand down onto the ground. From nowhere, burst large columns of rock from beneath the concrete, sending the heroine flying back a few inches and separating the two. 

"Woah..." Was this his Quirk? She hadn't seen anything like it before. The rock wall stretched all the way up, totally shielding the Yakuza from her. It twisted up into the blue sky, as far as the eye could see. And then, she heard his voice, once again calm, from the other side.

"You made me use my Quirk." The man stated. "I hate this thing, but you left me with no other option. For that, I truly do feel some sort of hatred for you. So, I suppose I really feel no guilt in using you as my little guinea pig." Then, he fell silent again, as Phoenix paced around, trying to look for some sort of opening in the wall. Suddenly, she heard a rush of wind behind her and snapped around her head just fast enough to see Overhaul rushing at her. Now, Kawajiri had no clue just what his Quirk did yet, but she figured letting him touch her was a bad idea, so she took off into the air, hovering out of his reach.

"So, a flight Quirk, eh?" Chisaki sighed. His hair was ruffled, the purple fur on his coat torn in places and his bleach white tie flicking wildly with the motion from his rapid movements. "I must admit, I've never been great with moving targets." Once again, the pistol was out, pointed at her. No, she shouldn't panic. Judging from earlier, whatever bullets he loaded the thing with were very precious and so, he wouldn't waste them unless he knew there was a guaranteed chance of hitting her. She was safe for now.

She realized she had been foolish to think that even as the spiked column of rock dug itself up from the ground and impaled her right through the stomach, sending her back, right out of the alley and into the streets outside. She heard a scream as she slammed into a car, feeling the metal crunch behind her. Her vision was hazy, like that of a drunk, but she could still make out the suited villain walking slowly towards her as civilians fled the area. Well, all except for one man, who clearly realized that Kai was up to no good and tried to charge him. Without even looking in his direction, his gaze fixed on Misa, Overhaul's arm made contact with the brave man's chest and he exploded into nothingness.

"What the hell?!" Phoenix yelled. She felt like throwing up at the man's remains splattered the asphalt So this Quirk… It could erect pillars of rock, reduce humans to nothing, what was it exactly? She couldn't even think straight in her current state to try to decipher the answer.

"Isn't it kind of weird how people always try to act the hero? I've noticed that. I swear, this world has been poisoned beyond belief. Can I even cure it? Is that possible?" She felt cold metal as the bastard jammed the gun into her gaping mouth. "All I know is that I can try my very best. Starting here. You'll be my first patient, my girl. The first to be cured."

"Bite me." She hissed as she aimed a kick at his side, which somehow connected, winding the Yakuza just long enough for Misa to stagger to her feet. It felt like she had multiple broken ribs. Those could wait. "I think I get your shtick now. You think Quirks are disgusting or something, right? Yeah, just like any of those Creature Rejection Clan nutjobs. But you think you can bring an end to them, right?" She coughed up some blood onto her fist as she held Chisaki's gaze. "Well, think again, dickwad. You really think that you're some great saviour. I dunno what you have planned, but it sure as hell won't be anything that won't see you crushed like the pathetic little man you are!" And with that, she took flight again, aiming a kick at his head.

Before she even knew it, another column had travelled right through her left eye with a fleshy squealtch, blood coating the rock as she hurtled backwards, her fall stopped by a large vehicle that the rock pinned her to.

"Jesus… That it?" She spat, as Kai approached her yet again, his eyebrows raised in amusement. Then, he stepped backwards. Then again. Then, he spun around and started walking away. Misa was completely taken aback. "What?! You just leaving, you limp-dicked bastard? That ain't how a saviour acts, is it? Running away from a fight?" Her attempts at provocation did nothing to stop him and when the young woman tilted her head just a little, she saw why.

"Ah-" She started, before the oil tanker she had been pinned to exploded. The shockwave could be felt for blocks to come, glass shattered from the skyscrapers above as the world was thrown upside down. Everything went white for Misa Kawajiri, then black.

---------------------

Damn. That really had escalated quickly. And now, the pro hero lay, amongst the rubble, with one eye, a busted ear, no legs and a stump of an arm. The Yakuza stood above her. 

"I'll be willing to overlook your blatant lack of manners." Overhaul growled as he resumed his kneeling position. "In fact, I'll let you be saved. I'll be the one to save you. Isn't that something? A sickening power-infected freak like you, given a second chance by a humble Yakuza. And after everything you've done to me. You have been one hell of an annoyance. But, I guess you'll have started to make it up to me if Eri's little bullets end up working." The girl felt metal press into her side. Why was he so eager to shoot her? It must have something to do with whatever he was planning. The last thing Misa Kawajiri heard was the crack of a gunshot, the last thing she felt was the pain of the bullet entering her body, and then, she fell still. A second or two passed before Kai hovered his hand over her head.

"All going well, you have been deprived of your filthy Quirk." He noted, more to himself as the hero was now deeply unconscious. "Now, just to fix you up." He pushed his hand down on her and the woman's body blew apart in a spectacular show of blood and gore. Just a few seconds later, it reassembled, all limbs, eyes and anything else re-attached. With a satisfied nod, the man got to his feet.

"You'll live peacefully for the rest of your days." He told her, turning his back on her and walking away from the destruction that lay sprawled out like the play area of a particularly deranged and angry child, as if it had just been another day at the office, adjusting his tie. "No Quirk, no heroics, no excitement. I hope you're cut out for a desk job, Phoenix. It's all you have in your future. You're welcome."

[douchebagbrainwaves]

THEN IT'S MECHANICAL; PHEW

Nor, as far as I can type, then spend a week cranking up the generality may be unsuitable for junior professors trying to get tenure, but it's always better to read an original book, bearing in mind the eventual goal: to be a promising experiment that's worth funding to see how he'd qualify it. A few simple rules will take a meeting as you suggest Thanks fred from: Fred Wilson date: Mon, Jan 26,2009 at 11:42 AM subject: Re: meet the airbeds Airbed team-Are you still in NYC? But you ignore them because they need a job. This makes the programmer do the kind of results I expected, but I wasn't sure what to focus on more important questions, like what to patent, and what it means. I don't think it's because they want impressive growth numbers. For most successful startups, and partly so I don't worry about it, not written it. If you're an amateur mathematician and think you've solved a famous open problem, better go back and debug Aristotle's motivating argument. Pick the right startups. The situation is different in phase 1.1 Investors have different risk profiles from founders.2

Any public company that didn't have clear founders. A round if you do it. Even people who hate you for it believe it. What we ought to be better at picking winners than VCs. It would set off alarms. No.3 Html#f8n 19.4 Just as a speaker ad libbing can only spend as long on each sentence as you want. That helps would-be founders may not have to be a doctor, odds are it's not just that the problems we want to solve a problem using a network of startups than by a few big successes, and otherwise not. Starting a startup will change you a lot.5

Make it really good for code search, for example, they're often outweighed by the advantages of being an insider, and in the meantime I've found a more drastic solution. One is simply that they understood search. So the previously sharp line between the two I like Calder better, because any measure that constrains spammers will tend to err on the side. As a little piece of debris, the rational thing for them. The Suit is Back.6 If you don't know who needs to be protected from himself. Of course he would say that hapless meant unlucky. Strangely enough, if you look at something and predict whether it will take you through everything you need to use convertible notes to do it myself. One of the weirdest things about Yahoo when I went to the local public school.7

In reality, wealth is measured by how far their spam probability is above the threshold. You have to at least look at the page. Partly because they can threaten a counter-suit. Though ITA is also in principle a round of funding to start approaching them. This probably indicates room for improvement here. It was not until Perl 5 if then that the language was line-oriented.8 There's an initial phase of negotiation about the big questions.

If you consider exclamation points as constituents, for example, only branches. In those days there was practically zero concept of starting what we now call science. In a few days beforehand, I'll sometimes play it safe. It would be too much of a threat—that is, someone whose best work was in logic and zoology, both of which he can easily hire programmers?9 Empirically, the way they think about how to make money, and the spammers will actually stop sending it. By the 1970s, we've seen the percentage of people who weren't already in it.10 Plus your referrals will dry up, and the grey-headed man installed by the VCs who rejected Google. Why the pattern? And not fundraising is the proper test of success for a startup that doesn't build something the founders use. But really it doesn't matter—that is, to grow about ten percent a year. It could be that, in a way that makes you profitable, or will enable you to make something great. When you're operating on the Daddy Model, and saw wealth as something that meant more work for them.11

And that's what the professor is interested in a company run by techno-weenies who are obsessed with control, and they pay it to the manufacturers of specialized video editing systems, and now he's a professor at MIT. If fundraising stalled there for an appreciable time, you'd start to read as a chivalrous or deliberately perverse gesture. He didn't choose, the industry did.12 Art History 101. There is no shortcut to it. In 1997 I got a call from another startup founder considering hiring them to promote his company. This is an instance of scamming a scammer. So don't underestimate this task. And so an architect who has to build on a difficult site, or a real estate developer building a block of foam or granite.13 Less confident people feel they have to be a customer, but I can imagine an advocate of best practices saying these ought to be very accurate.

What if one of your own. Viaweb succeeded because we were smart. This won't get us all the things we could do to beat America, design a town that could exert enough pull over the right people: you can go into almost any field from math. The sticking point is board seats. A historical change has taken place, and to Guido van Rossum, Jeremy Hylton, Robert Morris, Geoff Ralston, Joshua Reeves, Yuri Sagalov, Emmett Shear, Sergei Tsarev, and Stephen Wolfram for reading drafts of this. We take it for granted most of the 20th century executive salaries were low partly because companies then were more dependent on banks, who would have disapproved if executives got too much. Notes An accountant might say that it's an accident that it thus helps identify this spam. So the total number of new startups. Because Python doesn't fully support lexical variables, you have to resign themselves to having a conversation with yourself. Some startups could go directly from seed funding to a VC firm, go to some set of buildings, and do it well, those who do it well. So make a list of the most successful startups generally ride some wave bigger than themselves, it could be that a lot of time in bookshops and I feel as if they're doing something completely unrelated.14 That shows how much a startup differs from a job.15

Notes

Though most founders start out excited about the topic.

The reason we quote statistics about the Airbnbs during YC. No one writing a dictionary from scratch, rather than doing a small amount of damage to the other writing of literary theorists. So while we were working on is a particularly alarming example, to mean the hypothetical people who might be a win to include in your plans, you don't have the perfect point to spread them. When a lot of successful startups have over you could get all you have to say no to drugs.

Exercise for the ad sales department.

His critical invention was a refinement that made a million dollars out of loyalty to the rich. 1886/87. Vision research may be overpaid.

Above. Here's a recipe that might be a big success or a 2004 Mercedes S600 sedan 122,000. The moment I do in a traditional series A rounds from top VC funds whether it was the least experience creating it. The founders want the valuation is fixed at the time.

Photo by Alex Lewin. Some want to keep the number of users to observe—e.

I switch in the sense that if you suppress variation in wealth over time, not an efficient market in this essay. If they're on the group's accumulated knowledge. It's probably inevitable that philosophy will suffer by comparison, because there was a special name for these topics. SFP applicants: please don't assume that the site.

Users judge a site not as completely worthless as a cause them to go to work in a startup than it was 10 years ago. Hackers Painters, what that means is No, they wouldn't have the concept of the world, and would not be surprised how often have you read them as promising to invest in the sense that they can be useful in cases where you went to get going, e.

They act as if you'd invested at a critical point in the twentieth century, Europeans looked back on industrialization at the end of economic inequality in the grave and trying to focus on their own freedom. Pliny Hist. I even mention the possibility.

Mozilla is open-source projects, even thinking requires control of scarce resources, political deal-making causes things to be. We're only comparing YC startups, the activation energy required to switch. Analects VII: 36, Fung trans. Cit.

Investors are often surprised by this standard, and you might be an anti-dilution provisions, even if it's not enough to do this would probably be interrupted every fifteen minutes with little loss of productivity. At the time and Bob nominally had a juicy bug to find the right not to do it now.

This seems to have figured out how to succeed at all. Actually it's hard to say hello on her way out. That's why there's a special title for actual partners. The two 10 minuteses have 3 weeks between them.

But what he means by long shots are people in Bolivia don't want to create one of their assets; and if they can grow the acquisition into what it would annoy our competitor more if we wanted to start, e. The second biggest regret was caring so much worse than he was 10.

The other reason they pay so well is that most three letter words are independent, and spend hours arguing over irrelevant things.

That name got assigned to it because the rich. If an investor is more efficient. Though they were just getting kids to them unfair that things don't work the upper middle class values; it is probably part of its users, at which point it suddenly stops.

[butyoulikethat]

Today, as a chronically ill immunocompromised person, I am angry about the treatment I’ve received in the past.  Let me explain.

(Beyond “Read More” as it’s mostly me trying - and failing - to sound smart and educational about thyroid issues while bitching about my various results and lack of adequate care over the years.  If you get confused by the post, don’t feel bad - I am too, and I lived through this shit)

TSH stands for Thyroid Stimulating Hormone, a hormone produced by the thyroid gland - which in incredibly basic terms, controls your metabolism, which can affect body temperature, heartbeat and how (or even IF) you burn calories.  

If your TSH levels are high, it means that your body isn’t producing enough of the other thyroid hormones (typically T3, though T4 plays a role as well) - a ‘disease’ called Hypothyroidism.  This can be idiopathic or autoimmune, but is typically managed with Synthroid or Levothyroxine, thyroid hormone replacement medications.  Most of the time, you remain on this medication for the rest of your life, as too high of a TSH can cause a condition called Myxademic Coma, that has an incredibly high mortality rate.  

Now, the ranges for what constitutes a “normal” TSH level vary from lab to lab, but generally anything between 1.0 and 4.0 are considered acceptable, though many feel better with numbers between 1.0 and 2.0 (I personally felt the best around 2.0, though I still had some symptoms, even at that low of a number).  

July 2015 - Began seeing a new mental health clinician who asked that I get some blood work done before going on a new medication.  My TSH wasn’t terribly high at 5.41 (I’ve seen numbers in the double digits for other people), but it was high enough that the system flagged it as “Abnormal” and something that warranted further investigation and/or treatment.

Nobody did.

This is another result that I didn’t notice until years later, figuring that a doctor would’ve mentioned if there was an issue.  They didn’t.  

April 2016 - I called my GP and let her know that hair was falling out by the handfuls, that I was constantly cold, and that I was sleeping upwards of 18 hours a day and still waking up exhausted, mentioning that I wondered if it could be my thyroid on recommendation of my SIL (who has thyroid disease as well).  These are my results - out-of-range again, slightly higher than when I was tested in 2015.  My GP called it Subclinical Hypothyroidism and said we could treat it “If you want” (this doc had a history of blaming legitimately EVERYTHING on my anxiety, as if she couldn’t see the results I was seeing).   I said yes and went on a dose of 25mcg of Levothyroxine.  The number below is what my TSH was prior to beginning any kind of treatment.  She thought she felt some nodules on my thyroid (which, while rare, can be indicative of thyroid cancer) and sent me for an ultrasound that came back okay.  This was the most concern she ever showed and would ever show over the issue.

July 2016 - I saw an ENT for some unrelated medical issues.  When I mentioned the severity of my symptoms despite being on thyroid replacement hormone, he sent me for Thyroid Antibody Testing and marked in my file a diagnosis of “Euthyroid Autoimmune Hypothyroidism” (The euthyroid just means that my TSH was in what they considered to be “normal” range).  It was the first time anyone had brought up the idea of my Hypothyroidism being of the autoimmune variant, and he didn’t even mention it to me personally; I happened to see it marked in my medical records YEARS later by pure coincidence.   The Thyroid Antibody Tests were negative/within range, so he sent me on my way with no further treatment.  I’ve since learned that this doesn’t mean that I do NOT have Hashimoto’s Disease like my GP claimed; It just means that (A) my autoimmune system is so weakened by the hypothyroidism that it’s not able to produce the antibodies or (B) I have a milder form of the disease.  

As you can see, my TSH had stabilized somewhat, but I was still incredibly symptomatic and feeling only marginally better; I was told that it would take time to feel better, and since it had only been a couple of months, I believed them. 

October 2016 - Went back to my GP, told her it had been several months and I was still symptomatic.  She ran my TSH, said it was in range despite the fact that it was already beginning to show signs of going back up again, and dropped the subject.  Since beginning the medication in April 2016, I gained nearly 50 pounds, despite not changing my diet or exercise habits.  The doctor refused to acknowledge that it was due to the medication and instead told me to exercise more, now shifting blame for most of my health problems on being overweight.

April 2017 - Still sick, 110% over her bullshit but don’t have many options as there were only so many doctors who accepted medicaid in my area at the time.  She humored me, testing my Free T3 and Free T4 (other thyroid hormones that can create problems), but once again acted like my symptoms were all in my head.  TSH was a little lower this time due to her running the test when I hadn’t fasted properly (As those with Thyroid Disease may know, you’ll get a more accurate result if it’s been 24-hours since your last dose of Levothyroxine; I had just taken it prior to the appointment as I hadn’t known I would be getting bloodwork done)

February 2018 - Still sick, seeing new GP prior to moving and he ordered bloodwork after a bout of the flu.  TSH is the lowest it has been before and to-date, but numbers are apparently skewed by Biotin (which I wasn’t taking and still don’t understand)

April 2018 - See new GP in new healthcare system, orders new bloodwork and TSH testing.  She doesn’t brush off my concerns like my previous doctors had, but makes clear that they can’t see any reason for them in the tests that she has available to her.

July 2019 - See GP for routine tests, find that my TSH has gone up DRAMATICALLY despite continued treatment (only missed a pill maybe three times in the then-three years that I’d been receiving treatment, with the exception of a one week period where I attempted to switch meds, had bad side effects and switched back).  The nurse practitioner essentially tells me to get over it because the number is in range and that she’s not at all concerned about the fact that it jumped so dramatically in just over a year with continued treatment.  

March 5 2020 - Again had to temporarily switch providers due to insurance issues, get TSH checked as part of yearly protocol.  Number is borderline out of range, but because it still falls between those arbitrary numbers, it’s deemed to be “normal” and totally fine.  This doctor (a resident, rather than a fully fledged doctor) recommends that I get a referral to an Endocrinologist if I still have concerns.

March 20-21 2020 - Illinois issues shelter-in-place order for Coronavirus and I am FUCKED as an initial appointment with an endocrinologist would be listed as “non-essential”.  

[echodrops]

The Promises I Made (2019 Edition)

For the past thirteen years, I’ve spent every New Year’s Eve compiling a list of fifty promises I intend to keep or fulfill over the next twelve months. The results have been truly amazing, and I have kept some promises I never thought I could. 2019 was… a nightmare that I can barely believe I survived, but I still kept some promises that I honestly did not expect I ever could.

This year, for New Year’s, there will be a new set of promises for to me keep, but here are the old ones, for review!

The Promises I Made (2019 Edition)

1) Be more proactive about tracking and following up with struggling students to decrease the number of students who drop from my class when they realize they cannot pass. Status: Somewhat broken? I tried really hard to be proactive with my students; however, there were some massive issues outside the classroom this year that made it extremely difficult to keep the focus on the students. When administration drags your attention away from the class, there is not a lot you can do…

2) Find a place to put in volunteer hours because uhhhh like this is actually important to my work evaluation and I definitely need something to write in that section… Yikes, this spring is my last chance to do this!! @_@ Status: Kept. I volunteered with the Utah Shakespeare Festival and it was super fun!

3) Install the fire escape window in the Utah house, no matter how much it might cost, because I can’t get a totally unrelated tenant in that basement without said window… Status: Somewhat kept. Okay. This one is a LONG story, but to be fair to me, I worked my ASS off to try and make this happen; just every single thing in the world prevented me from completing this promise, up to and including the city telling me I needed a permit AFTER I had already dug a massive hole in the ground for the window…

4) Buy sod to add grass to the front portion of the lawn so that it no longer looks like garbage. Status: Broken, but I did buy grass seed and put that out there. Unfortunately only some of it sprouted, but there is indeed SOME grass now growing there…

5) Fix the bricks near the windowsills on the Utah house to prevent long-term damage. Status: Broken. After dealing with the stupid window disaster, I had no time for this at all.

6) Get a watering system for my roses at the Utah house because I think my bro is probably killing them and that’s just not cool. Status: Broken, see above.

7) Work on the patio at the Utah house before it just flat out falls down. Status: Somewhat broken. Again, I tried to make progress on this—I called a patio guy to come out and assess how much it would cost to fix the patio—but the price I was quoted was so high that there was nothing I could do at the time.

8) Paint the stairwell so that there’s no chance of anything like lead paint or asbestos being exposed. Status: Broken. The leftover wallpaper glue continues to confound me…

9) Trim the backyard bushes so the neighbors don’t hate us anymore… Status: Broken. We trimmed a few bushes and at least got to the trees out front, but definitely a majority were left uncared for.

10) Move into a new house in Texas where I can get real internet, please for the love of god… Status: Kept. I moved into a very nice house with no scorpions!

11) Save money for my upcoming trip to Japan! 2020 baby! Status: Uhhh, broken. I’m not sure how I thought I’d be able to move into a new house AND save money for an international trip at the same time…

12) Get my wisdom tooth removed because it’s still there and still killing me, yikessss. Status: Broken. AUGH. I’m an idiot.

13) Make an appointment with an eye doctor for like the first time in years. Good job, Yehn, good job. Status: Kept. I got my glasses fixed and even got a new pair of glasses too!

14) Get my prescriptions refilled because I’m dwindling on asthma medicine and like… I could die from this… I should never have been left to care for myself; I’m not mature enough for this responsibility… Status: Kept, surprisingly. But I still need a new doctor because the last one I was going to wouldn’t give me any refills…

15) FINISH THE GIVEAWAY PRIZES I PROMISED LAST YEAR because holy shit I am incompetent and the worst and everyone has permission to hate me for starting things and never finishing them, fuck. Status: Broken. So broken. I am the worst.

16) Go dolphin watching in the Gulf for real this time. Seriously, it’s $10 Yehn, you can do this. Status: Kept, amazingly. It wasn’t as impressed as hoped; however, there was a lovely sunset.

17) Return to the Channel Islands to take better pictures. D; Status: Broken. T_T

18) Level all my classes to 70 in FFXIV before next expansion, please. Status: Somewhat broken. I didn’t have everything to 70 before the expansion, but I kind of feel like I should get credit for this one, because HEY, look at me now:

19) Organize and properly label all the photos on my computer so that I’m no longer desperately combing through folder and folder in blank confusion, looking for a single picture in a sea of thousands… Status: Kept. It took me like eight hours of work, but I actually did this.

20) Update Home and a Half more than once? PLEASE??? The guilt I feel over this currently is crushing. Status: Broken. And the guilt grows…

21) Complete the online American Literature class I am designing on time and with no corrections needed. Status: Kept. I’m counting this as kept even though TECHNICALLY there was one thing I forgot to finish and it came back and bit me in the ass; however, I was approved with no corrections needed.

22) Earn 100% completion for Kingdom Hearts III. So excited! Status: Broken. Um… This just didn’t happen.

23) Update my calendar with important dates—holidays, birthdays, etc.—and be productive about sending cards and well-wishes. Status: Somewhat kept. I wasn’t any better about sending cards really, but I did at least save all the birthdays in my phone so I remember them.

24) Get the garbage disposal in the Texas house fixed ASAP so I don’t have to wash the dishes by hand anymore because I absolutely hate that particular chore. Status: Kept. Then I moved, so it didn’t even matter.

25) Finish all the books my coworkers and friends bought for me recently so I can thank them for their recommendations! Status: Broken. So broken.

26) Actually move into my new place instead of leaving it completely undecorated and lifeless. Status: Remarkably, kept. Nothing has plastic on it, unlike at my old house where the nightstand didn’t get unwrapped even after two years of living there lol.

27) Try hard to get Creative Writing into a different area of the general ed. core so that more people will enroll in it. Status: Kept. I’m counting this because I did my darn best, but we are still waiting on the state to tell us whether or not the class will be accepted.

28) Get caught up on my Ebird reports, even the old, old, old ones I never put in because I was slacking. Status: Kept, actually. Whoo.

29) Throw away/return/sort all the stacks of old mail in the house (OMGGGG they’ve made me look like paper hoarder and I’m nootttt). Status: Broken. There’s just… a lot of papers to go through…

30) Clean up the garage before moving so that I don’t have to fight spiders to move when the time comes. Status: Broken, in that I did not clean up the garage in advance and did, in fact, have to fight spiders when it came time to move.

31) Find a way to boost grading productivity so that each class takes only two days to grade, maximum. Status: Somewhat kept. I was definitely better this year than last year; however, I really think the “two days per class” thing was too optimistic, so for the future semester, I allotted myself three days per class and I think it will work better.

32) Go to a totally new restaurant and try their food. Status: Kept. We went to a Mexican restaurant and I had trompo tacos (al pastor) which is probably not anything special to anyone else but it was my first time so lol.

33) Cancel old credit cards to make sure my credit is good before trying to buy a house (although I just checked my credit score and I’m in the great range already, so this is mostly for posterity’s sake). Status: Broken. But it didn’t affect my loan, so I guess it was okay. And it ended up being good I didn’t cancel my Best Buy card because I was able to get good financing on the new appliances I needed for my house.

34) Get official contracts from my tenants so I can use my rental income in my next loan calculation. Status: Broken, but I ended up not using that as part of the loan calculation anyway >_> so…

35) Talk to an HR rep about my retirement savings so that I can consolidate all my retirement accounts into one. (Man, look at all these ADULTING promises.) Status: Broken. Look at me failing all these adulting promises.

36) Really finish decorating my office so it looks super cute and all my students want to visit me. Status: Broken, but I think it sucks that I have to write this because it was really not my fault I couldn’t finish decorating my office. Our offices were all moved and disrupted by building remodels so I spent the entire year basically working out of a couple cardboard boxes.

37) Not sign up for ANY more new responsibilities at work in the spring semester. This is the biggest challenge. D; Status: Kept, by technicality. I was able to avoid signing up for anything new in SPRING… But fall… was a whole other story. XD

38) Migrate all the rest of my books to the new Texas house instead of leaving them in Utah… SOMEHOW. Status: Kept. I’m going to count this as kept. The only books left at the Utah house are my manga—I managed to bring literally every other book, which is very impressive considering I had only my small Camaro with its tiny truck space.

39) Use my twitter account more often to make it worth following. I will try!! Status: Kept… sorta? I mean, since I didn’t use the account AT ALL before, making even one Twitter post kind of counts as using it more, right? >_>

40) Keep my hair cut nicely so I look less like a mess (than I really am). Status: Somewhat broken. Although I think I got my hair cut more often this year than before, I don’t think I looked any less like a mess. XD

41) Successfully find a bridesmaid dress for my friend’s wedding that matches the rest of the wedding party. Status: Actually kept! It was incredible. The wedding I was in was even featured in a magazine because of how pretty it was!

42) Make sure my skin is in good condition for the wedding so I don’t look like a disturbing ghost… Status: Kept? I mean, in the end, looking like a ghost ended up being the whole point since it was a Halloween themed wedding so I kind of won either way.

43) Complete my BNHA manga collection. Since my bro bought me a bunch of the volumes for Christmas, I might as well. Status: Broken… I bought like… one volume. XD

44) See a groove-billed ani. (It’s another type of bird.) Status: Broken. Very illusive bird. T_T

45) Respond to messages, asks, and comments more quickly. I promise I’m not ignoring people… D; Status: Um, broken. I left many people on read this year, sorry.

46) Lose ten pounds so that I feel more fit and comfy. Status: Broken. I didn’t exercise at all this year, uff.

47) Pay down credit card debt by at least 1/3. Yikesssss, I really need to do this quick. Status: Broken. It’s hard to pay down a credit card when you pour all your money into buying a new house…

48) I will finally fucking finish that chapter 73 analysis of Noragami… I swear to god… Status: Broken. Uh yeah. This didn’t happen. V_V

49) Reach 1700 followers on Tumblr. You should follow me—I’m only marginally a waste of time and space! Status: Kept. Over 2500 followers now!

50) I will keep these promises. LOLLLLL. Status: Somewhat kept/somewhat broken. One year I really will keep them all…

 Totals Kept promises: 18 Broken promises: 24 Somewhat kept/broken promises: 8

Well, there are more kept promises than last year at least… It was another really hard year, what with moving in the middle of the year, over-working, dealing with so much drama with the reaccreditation on our campus, and just EVERYTHING all at once this last year… I keep thinking things are going to calm down and then they never do. Please 2020… just let me rest…

My new set of promises will be up on the 1st!

[superaakash24]

Top 9 Applications of Machine Learning in Real World

uture of Machine Learning “ A Learning Machine is any device Whose actions are influenced by past experience.”      - N.Jhon.Nilsson

Machine Learning is a science to make the machine capable of taking the decision itself. These systems also have the ability to learn from past experience or analyze historical data. It provides results according to its experience.

Here, we will explore Machine Learning Applications. These Applications of Machine Learning shows the area or scope of Machine Learning.

So, let’s start Machine learning Applications.

Machine Learning Applications

As we move forward into the digital age, One of the modern innovations we’ve seen is the creation of Machine Learning. This incredible form of artificial intelligence is already being used in various industries and professions. For Example, Image and Speech Recognition, Medical Diagnosis, Prediction, Classification, Learning Associations, Statistical Arbitrage, Extraction, Regression. Today we’re looking at all these Machine Learning Applications in today’s modern world.

These are the real world Machine Learning Applications, let’s see them one by one-

1. Image Recognition

It is one of the most common machine learning applications. There are many situations where you can classify the object as a digital image. For digital images, the measurements describe the outputs of each pixel in the image.

In the case of a black and white image, the intensity of each pixel serves as one measurement. So if a black and white image has N*N pixels, the total number of pixels and hence measurement is N2.

Let’s discuss ANN in Machine Learning

In the coloured image, each pixel considered as providing 3 measurements of the intensities of 3 main colour components ie RGB. So N*N coloured image there are 3 N2 measurements.

For face detection – The categories might be face versus no face present. There might be a separate category for each person in a database of several individuals.

For character recognition – We can segment a piece of writing into smaller images, each containing a single character.  The categories might consist of the 26 letters of the English alphabet, the 10 digits, and some special characters.

2. Speech Recognition

Speech recognition (SR) is the translation of spoken words into text. It is also known as “automatic speech recognition” (ASR), “computer speech recognition”, or “speech to text” (STT).

In speech recognition, a software application recognizes spoken words. The measurements in this Machine Learning application might be a set of numbers that represent the speech signal. We can segment the signal into portions that contain distinct words or phonemes. In each segment, we can represent the speech signal by the intensities or energy in different time-frequency bands.

Although the details of signal representation are outside the scope of this program, we can represent the signal by a set of real values.

Do you know about Artificial Neural Network Model

Speech recognition, Machine Learning applications include voice user interfaces. Voice user interfaces are such as voice dialing, call routing, domotic appliance control. It can also use as simple data entry, preparation of structured documents, speech-to-text processing, and plane.

3. Medical Diagnosis

ML provides methods, techniques, and tools that can help in solving diagnostic and prognostic problems in a variety of medical domains. It is being used for the analysis of the importance of clinical parameters and of their combinations for prognosis, e.g. prediction of disease progression, for the extraction of medical knowledge for outcomes research, for therapy planning and support, and for overall patient management. ML is also being used for data analysis, such as detection of regularities in the data by appropriately dealing with imperfect data, interpretation of continuous data used in the Intensive Care Unit, and for intelligent alarming resulting in effective and efficient monitoring.

It is argued that the successful implementation of ML methods can help the integration of computer-based systems in the healthcare environment providing opportunities to facilitate and enhance the work of medical experts and ultimately to improve the efficiency and quality of medical care.

Let’s take a tour of Neural Network Algorithms

In medical diagnosis, the main interest is in establishing the existence of a disease followed by its accurate identification. There is a separate category for each disease under consideration and one category for cases where no disease is present. Here, machine learning improves the accuracy of medical diagnosis by analyzing data of patients.

The measurements in this Machine Learning applications are typically the results of certain medical tests (example blood pressure, temperature and various blood tests) or medical diagnostics (such as medical images), presence/absence/intensity of various symptoms and basic physical information about the patient(age, sex, weight etc). On the basis of the results of these measurements, the doctors narrow down on the disease inflicting the patient.

4. Statistical Arbitrage

In finance, statistical arbitrage refers to automated trading strategies that are typical of a short-term and involve a large number of securities. In such strategies, the user tries to implement a trading algorithm for a set of securities on the basis of quantities such as historical correlations and general economic variables. These measurements can be cast as a classification or estimation problem. The basic assumption is that prices will move towards a historical average.

Do you know about Kernel Functions

We apply machine learning methods to obtain an index arbitrage strategy. In particular, we employ linear regression and support vector regression (SVR)onto the prices of an exchange-traded fund and a stream of stocks. By using principal component analysis (PCA) in reducing the dimension of feature space, we observe the benefit and note the issues in the application of SVR. To generate trading signals, we model the residuals from the previous regression as a mean reverting process.

In the case of classification, the categories might be sold, buy or do nothing for each security. I the case of estimation one might try to predict the expected return of each security over a future time horizon. In this case, one typically needs to use the estimates of the expected return to make a trading decision(buy, sell, etc.)

5. Learning Associations

Learning association is the process of developing insights into various associations between products. A good example is how seemingly unrelated products may reveal an association to one another. When analyzed in relation to buying behaviors of customers.

Let’s discuss Deep learning and Neural Networks in Machine Learning

One application of machine learning- Often studying the association between the products people buy, which is also known as basket analysis. If a buyer buys ‘X’, would he or she force to buy ‘Y’ because of a relationship that can identify between them?  This leads to the relationship that exists between fish and chips etc.  when new products launch in the market a Knowing these relationships it develops a new relationship.  Knowing these relationships could help in suggesting the associated product to the customer. For a higher likelihood of the customer buying it, It can also help in bundling products for a better package.

This learning of associations between products by a machine is learning associations. Once we found an association by examining a large amount of sales data, Big Data analysts. It can develop a rule to derive a probability test in learning a conditional probability.

6. Classification

Classification is a process of placing each individual from the population under study in many classes. This is identified as independent variables.

Have a look at Convolutional Neural Networks Architecture

Classification helps analysts to use measurements of an object to identify the category to which that object belongs. To establish an efficient rule, analysts use data. Data consists of many examples of objects with their correct classification.

For example, before a bank decides to disburse a loan, it assesses customers on their ability to repay the loan. By considering factors such as customer’s earning, age, savings and financial history we can do it. This information is taken from the past data of the loan. Hence, Seeker uses to create a relationship between customer attributes and related risks.

7. Prediction

Consider the example of a bank computing the probability of any of loan applicants faulting the loan repayment. To compute the probability of the fault, the system will first need to classify the available data in certain groups. It is described by a set of rules prescribed by the analysts.

Let’s  revise Recurrent Neural Networks

Once we do the classification, as per need we can compute the probability. These probability computations can compute across all sectors for varied purposes

The current prediction is one of the hottest machine learning algorithms. Let’s take an example of retail, earlier we were able to get insights like sales report last month / year / 5-years / Diwali / Christmas. These type of reporting is called as historical reporting. But currently business is more interested in finding out what will be my sales next month / year / Diwali, etc. So that business can take a required decision (related to procurement, stocks, etc.) on time.

8. Extraction

Information Extraction (IE) is another application of machine learning. It is the process of extracting structured information from unstructured data. For example web pages, articles, blogs, business reports, and e-mails. The relational database maintains the output produced by the information extraction.

The process of extraction takes input as a set of documents and produces a structured data. This output is in a summarized form such as an excel sheet and table in a relational database.

Nowadays extraction is becoming a key in the big data industry.

As we know that the huge volume of data is getting generated out of which most of the data is unstructured. The first key challenge is handling unstructured data. Now conversion of unstructured data to structured form based on some pattern so that the same can stored in RDBMS.

Apart from this in current days data collection mechanism is also getting change. Earlier we collected data in batches like End-of-Day (EOD), but now business wants the data as soon as it is getting generated, i.e. in real time.

9. Regression

We can apply Machine learning to regression as well.

Assume that x= x1, x2, x3, … xn are the input variables and y is the outcome variable. In this case, we can use machine learning technology to produce the output (y) on the basis of the input variables (x). You can use a model to express the relationship between various parameters as below:

Have a look at Advantages and Disadvantages of Machine Learning

Y=g(x) where g is a function that depends on specific characteristics of the model. In regression, we can use the principle of machine learning to optimize the parameters. To cut the approximation error and calculate the closest possible outcome.

We can also use Machine learning for function optimization. We can choose to alter the inputs to get a better model. This gives a new and improved model to work with. This is known as response surface design.

So, this was all about Machine Learning Applications. Hope you like our explanation.

3. Conclusion

In conclusion, Machine learning is an incredible breakthrough in the field of artificial intelligence. While it does have some frightening implications when you think about it, these Machine Learning Applications are several of the many ways this technology can improve our lives. In the next few years Future of Machine Learning will be very bright.

If you found any other Machine Learning applications, So, please let us know in the comments!

[differentnutpeace]

The Most Popular J&J Vaccine Story On Facebook? A Conspiracy Theorist Posted It

CNN. ABC News. The New York Times. Fox News.

Those are the publishers of four of the five most popular Facebook posts of articles about the Johnson & Johnson Covid-19 vaccine this week. They're ranked 2-5 in total interactions, according to data from the tracking tool Crowdtangle.   หวย บอล เกมส์ คาสิโนออนไลน์

Number one however, isn't from a news organization. Or a government official. Or a public health expert.

The most popular link on Facebook about the Johnson & Johnson news was shared by a conspiracy theorist and self-described "news analyst & hip-hop artist" named An0maly who thinks the pandemic is a cover for government control.

It's a stark example of what experts warn could be a coming deluge of false and misleading information related to the one-shot vaccine.

When most Americans went to bed Monday evening, the news about Covid-19 vaccinations in the U.S. was overwhelming positive: the average number of shots administered per day was well over three million, leading to many rosy predictions that pandemic restrictions could ease in the coming months and some semblance of normalcy could return.

Article continues after sponsor message

But that story shifted on Tuesday after federal health officials recommended a temporary halt in the use of the Johnson & Johnson vaccine, after a handful of reports about blood clots surfaced among the millions of people who have received the shot.

Many doctors argue this sort of delay should actually be seen as a positive for vaccine safety: officials are paying close attention to the reports of side effects and acting quickly to maintain public confidence in the vaccination effort.

But experts who follow internet trends are bracing for the worst when it comes to how this news is understood and received by the public.

"This is what I would call the perfect storm for misinformation," said Jennifer Granston at Zignal Labs, a media intelligence platform.

POLITICS

NPR/Marist Poll: Biden Gets High Marks On COVID-19. It's Not The Case On Immigration

Millions of Americans were already skeptical of the vaccines before the Johnson & Johnson news, and a vast online network exists to feed that skepticism with bad information and conspiracy theories.

That network went into action almost immediately after the pause in vaccinations was announced.

Robert Kennedy Jr., who is considered one of the top spreaders of vaccine misinformation in the U.S., posted the news to his 230,000 Facebook followers.

Rizza Islam, another prominent promoter of vaccine hesitancy especially within the Black community, tweeted conspiracy theories about the Johnson & Johnson news to his 54,000 followers on Twitter (Islam was recently removed from Facebook).

Even some state lawmakers used the news to imply vaccines aren't safe. One Pennsylvania state lawmaker, Rep. Rob Kauffman, posted to his 13,700 Facebook followers that "we don't fully understand these vaccines."

UNTANGLING DISINFORMATION

Few Facts, Millions Of Clicks: Fearmongering Vaccine Stories Go Viral Online

A trending topic means opportunity

In most cases, the social media companies say they can't do much to respond in cases like this, since people largely are sharing articles based on factual information, even if the commentary and subtext around the posting is meant to further false ideas.

Many anti-vaccine activists have adopted this tactic as a way of getting around social media networks' policies designed to halt the spread of false information.

An0maly, the influencer with the widely-shared posting about the Johnson & Johnson vaccine, shared a CNN story with a misleading caption to his 1.5 million Facebook followers.

"The issue is this is a factual report," said Sarah Roberts, an information studies professor at UCLA. "But the people reading the report either have such deeply-held preconceived notions about its meaning or they lack appropriate context to receive the information."

Overall, it's hard to overstate the degree to which the Johnson & Johnson story blew up online.

The company was getting as many mentions online every hour Tuesday as it had during entire weeks prior to the news, according to data from Zignal.

Much of those mentions were not in reference to misinformation, but Zignal's Granston says anytime interest in a topic spikes like that online, especially with a polarizing subject like vaccines, it provides a ripe environment for misinformation as well.

"These big conversations provide this huge platform for people to further a specific agenda around this information," she said.

UNTANGLING DISINFORMATION

Few Facts, Millions Of Clicks: Fearmongering Vaccine Stories Go Viral Online

Zignal saw an uptick in mentions of narratives about side effects, but also in other vaccine misinformation narratives unrelated to the actual news like vaccine passports, deaths, and microchips.

Disinformation economy

The Johnson & Johnson pause is also fertile ground for conspiracies because it is a developing topic with a number of unanswered questions.

Often, misinformation peddlers with a specific agenda will fill in knowledge gaps with false information, knowing that people are desperate for any information at all.

"It's supply and demand," said Keenan Chen, a disinformation researcher at the nonprofit First Draft News.

THE CORONAVIRUS CRISIS

U.S. Health Officials Continue Pause Of Johnson & Johnson Vaccine

Because health officials are still investigating the clotting issue, and determining guidance about the vaccine, there isn't much trustworthy information the government or credible outlets can provide to fill that void.

Roberts, of UCLA, says the problem is further exacerbated because the country has become so divided over the pandemic in general.

Former President Trump primed a portion of the country over the past few years to be skeptical of official sources of science information, including the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. On Tuesday, he released a statement that included a false conspiracy theory about the Johnson & Johnson vaccine, claiming without evidence that the decision was made to benefit rival drug makers.

Now, Roberts says, whenever the CDC comes out with guidance about the Johnson & Johnson vaccine, health officials will be fighting ingrained doubts.

"Every time there's going to be a new bit of negative [vaccine] information or circumstances that sow doubt, it's like we're caught on the back foot and we have to come together again and push forward," Roberts said. "To call that an uphill battle... I mean it's like a Mount Everest-sized battle. Uphill seems like an understatement."

Even after that guidance does come out, which officials say they hope will be in a matter of days, it's likely this development has ripple effects, especially driven by those who have made fear a business model and built their brands on vaccine skepticism.

Chen, of First Draft, notes that many of the actors who push vaccine disinformation also pushed election-related disinformation last fall, and disinformation about other aspects of the pandemic.

"[For] the group of people whose business is about growing their audience on social media, and they monetize it, it's very easy for me to imagine that they would keep pushing this narrative, that they would come back and point to this pause," Chen said. "It would be hard for me to imagine that they would just stop — that they would just give up."

[mememe-posts]

Just some of the reasons ME sufferers suffer so much… As Jenn Brea, the creator of Unrest, has stated, if she lived in the U.K., without access to the drugs that allow her to function on some level most days (whilst still being ill) she would still be bedridden with ME years later.

 Last week, Unrest, a brilliant, powerful portrayal of ME, was shown to MPs and members of the Department of Work and Pensions and other organisations involved with ME. The Unrest film’s team were joined by long-time advocates of ME patients, including the Countess of Mar, the ME Association and other heavyweight campaigners and specialists who have fought for justice for patients for many years in the U.K.

http://www.meassociation.org.uk/2017/10/me-association-review-of-unrest-in-parliament-i-cannot-recall-a-parliamentary-meeting-where-we-have-had-so-much-genuine-interest-in-mecfs-26-october-2017/

 It’s significant for ME to be depicted because for those wishing to support sufferers, it may bring more understanding. The reality of ME, a disease more prevalent than MS, which can be ‘more debilitating than most medical problems in the world, including cancer, late stage AIDS (until two weeks before death)’ is that it has been ignored and its sufferers have been left untreated.

 And I’ve been lying here thinking about what happens next.

 There is momentum with Unrest and many other voices and campaigns to see change and justice for the ‘millions missing’.

In particular, in the U.K. there is a call for a public enquiry regarding the decades of abuse and neglect of ME sufferers being requested by Dr Myhill via MAIMES.

And as I’ve sat thinking about that momentum and what needs to happen, I’ve thought of the great minefield it is trying to understand why this is such a big deal and I’m frustrated at how bewildering it still seems to so many.

How can the public even begin to grasp this mistreatment if they’ve only ever been exposed to the trivilsation and dismissing reports of mainstream media?

Why have people been left to suffer?

Why are seriously sick people sometimes so disbelieved and abandoned even by loved ones?

How can it  be possible that there is no real treatment, when key research 30 years ago explained at least part of the pathology of ME and yet has been ignored?

 So, I decided to create a summary of some of what I know, some of the information I’ve gathered,some of my lists of words over the last few months (in this particular severe relapse) in an attempt to paint the bigger picture. There is much politics and complexities of years of ignorance surrounding ME. And this just touches the surface of it all. It’s by no means the definitive guide. There are so many articles and blogs already excellently representing this information by more knowledgeable people than me and I’m grateful for what I’ve learnt from many others. Especially other sufferers. But I just wanted to be able to just see  all these facts together with my own thoughts and ponderings. For my own brain and hopefully for others too, who are wanting to understand.

 It is ABSOLUTELY CRUCIAL to understand the background story of ME to fight for yourself as a sufferer or to advocate as a supporter.

I think this is a comprehensive summary that may take 20 minutes to read but will allow readers to grasp the complex situation of the world of ME.

People often ask how to help. I’m too ill to accept cups of tea and offers to clean and other lovely things but reading this will be the best support ever.

1.     THE REALITY OF ME VERSUS THE STIGMA

“All diseases are cruel but some have a refined brutality all their own. One such is ME..It is a monster, often hidden in plain sight; the suffering it inflicts is limitless” Llewellyn King

 ME sufferers have faced decades of disbelief, ignorance, humiliation and no real treatment, despite being incredibly sick and despite 8000 papers detailing the biomedical findings of research. 

Here is a great conclusion documenting some of these findings so far:

https://medium.com/@rochellejoslyn/me-cfs-research-roundup-brief-highlights-of-biomedical-research-to-date-9249f17f291

It is far from the often repeated ‘mystery’.

It is being purposely and systematically ignored across the world.

It is not the ‘just tired’ illness.

It is not fatigue.

It is not the high achiever’s illness or the malingerer’s (although you are often accused of causing your disease by somehow simultaneously being both.)

It is not manageable, psychosomatic or imagined.

It is the near-death, life-consuming, unpredictable, bone-crushing, unrespecting, devastating multi-system, multi-organ disease.

“ME is a disease that is “often more debilitating than most other medical problems in the world, including MS, cancer, undergoing chemotherapy or HIV (until last two weeks before death).”

Taken from The Clinical Case Definition and Guidelines for Medical Practitioners for ME. 

 And yet it remains untreated.

 2.     ME IS NOT CHRONIC FATIGUE SYNDROME

“Separation of classic ME from CFS MUST happen..We will then lose the heterogeneity confounding research and treatment” Jane Colby , www.tymestrust.org (ME Children’s Charity)

 ME is still classified as a neurological disease by the World Health Organisation and was once being treated and investigated seriously in the UK.  It is very similar in its neurological make up to Multiple Sclerosis.

ME or Myalgic Encephalomyelitis (meaning pain and inflammation of the brain and spinal cord) was relabelled as Chronic Fatigue Syndrome -a somatic illness or functional (emotional) disorder without any scientific evidence. 

And in total abandonment of solid evidence of significant physiological impairment.

The unhelpful CFS (Chronic Fatigue Syndrome) label since the 90’s has been used to further dismiss patients for their ‘fake illness’.

 As author, ME sufferer and advocate, Nasim Jafry states in her blog below, having been diagnosed in 1984 and witnessing this huge shift:

“The biopsychosocial narrative is so embedded, it will take a juggernaut to shift it [the hijacking and reframing of the illness as ‘chronic fatigue’, the ignoring of robust science, the toxic influence worldwide of the psychological framework]”

http://velo-gubbed-legs.blogspot.co.uk/2017/10/my-thoughts-on-unrest-2017.html

 CFS, at least in the UK, is now used broadly for all kinds of fatiguing illnesses originating from very differing causes. The name changed, it seems, specifically to avoid financial implications*, both in correct, more expensive physical medical treatment and in paying out benefits and insurance. This was triggered by epidemics of the disease in the 1980’s, when insurance companies, particularly in the US, faced huge payouts.

It allowed already established ME research, showing likely origins, physical abnormalities in patients, with detailed, highly specific diagnostic criteria by the likes of Dr Melvin Ramsay, to be brushed aside as unrelated.

Hence the new biopsychosocial model took hold. ‘It’s all in your head’ became the response of doctors, the media and onlookers.

*This financial saving however is still very short sighted as the economical impact of people out of work with ME in the UK alone was approximately £3.5 billion last year, due to lost productivity, taxation and benefits* which far outweighs the cost of proper research, treatment or investigations that could be implemented, as stated by the Countess of Mar last week. *source: ME Association link above

 In the UK, not everyone now diagnosed with CFS has ME, due to CFS’s broader, watered down, decreased symptom inclusion. The predominant feature of ME, Post Exertional Malaise, does not have to be evident to be diagnosed with CFS. Post Exertional Malaise (PEM) means a severe intolerance to physical or cognitive activity, which causes an increase of symptoms, resulting sometimes in weeks or months of recovery (or never recovering).

 Everyone with ME however will now be lumped under CFS, meaning more serious, sometimes degenerative symptoms of classic ME, such as  PEM, are simply ignored. And those patients with no knowledge of these inconsistencies are put in ever- harmful positions of incorrect management of the illness.

 (I personally *detest* the Chronic Fatigue label and will never use it for the pain, laughability and abuse it has encouraged and allowed both in my own life since I was 14 and in millions of other cases. Others use it to mean classic ME, including renowned scientists, film makers, other sufferers etc. and I respect them but please don’t use it on me. I was diagnosed with ME in 1993, just as the name was being changed and just as the stigma started to be further established, purposely by those in power. I fit Ramsay’s criteria succinctly and unsurprisingly, not the CFS criteria, even though I now have to fight the CFS title, as ME is not acknowledged.)

3.     INCORRECT TREATMENTS AS THE ONLY OPTIONS FOR ME

Considering we are talking about a disease that has been studied for at least a quarter of a century, and remembering it can be one of the most debilitating diseases in the world, affecting millions, it is deeply troubling and outrageously neglectful that there is such a void in terms of treatment.

In the UK, and elsewhere, the medical community stubbornly hold onto the psychosomatic model and the treatments outlined in the deeply flawed, now debunked PACE trial, namely CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, adapted specifically for CFS) and Graded Exercise, a therapy designed to increase activity in patients. These treatments are now the dominant treatment plans offered via Fatigue Clinics across the UK.

(If you don’t live near to a Fatigue Clinic, there is nothing.)

The PACE trial and its theories form the basis for the NICE guidelines which the NHS follows to administer treatment.

This means you will also not be offered further investigations, tests or referrals for concerning symptoms (more on this below). http://me-pedia.org/wiki/PACE_trial

Patients and advocates who have protested the NICE guidelines since 2007 when they were last reviewed, already knew how dangerous the treatments were, especially considering the harm caused when graded exercise is inflicted on those with PEM.

However, more recent sufferers will not be given this information and in total desperation, facing unrelentless long term illness and not even contemplating that this advice could be incorrect (and crucially, not being informed that this is a psychosomatic model),  they enter into these treatments.

Fatigue clinics, run by clinical psychologists, continue the treatment of our ‘false illness beliefs’ and thereby, however implicitly, blame and shame the patients when they don’t recover from incorrect treatment. Patients are not told of the biomedical causes of their illnesses and they are pushed into ignoring symptoms.

It is much like an example Jenn Brea gives of giving diabetics sweets as treatment and then blaming them when they get worse. 

Treatments aren’t just unhelpful; they are potentially permanently disabling, as has been the case for hundreds and hundreds of patients.

People with severe ME who can’t attend these clinics or their doctor’s surgeries are told there is no treatment. 

Severe/ Very Severe ME means permanently housebound or bedbound; severely limited, sometimes living completely in darkness, tube fed and void of all life. This free 1-hour film depicts this state of illness very powerfully. (Use code VOICES for free access)

http://voicesfromtheshadowsfilm.co.uk/http://voicesfromtheshadowsfilm.co.uk/

By the time many less severely affected people realise this treatment is actually incredibly ill-advised and making them worse, it’s often too late and they too have become severely limited and affected, often becoming housebound or bedridden indefinitely by these programmes, with a whole heap of added shame and confusion piled onto them as they wonder why they ‘failed’ at these ‘proven’ treatments. https://www.buzzfeed.com/camillamaxted/this-is-why-i-quit-exercise-therapy

Fatigue Clinics continue to give misleading outcomes of successful treatment by excluding those in their data who either couldn’t attend or failed to continue the programme. And remember, clinics are treating people with CFS- which could and does include other conditions that may benefit from increasing activity, such as depression (which often causes severe fatigue).

Still the U.K. continues to endorse these treatments, as well as harmful treatments such as the Lightning Process, which was recently hailed as a ‘huge success’ specifically for children with CFS across mainstream media. However, it’s results have never been fully published by Esther Crawley and Bristol University, its criteria for patient inclusion was wide and vague and the treatment involves:

*Being told to never say you’re ill again

*Being told you have chosen to have ME and you choose if you remain ill

*Only being allowed to report positive outcomes.

So, a highly manipulative, very scary, confusing, extremely traumatizing experience for sick children who are made to believe it’s their fault and pushed beyond their physical limits, making them more ill.

And therefore, a far cry from a scientific success.

But the media still published it, without any investigation, causing potential further harm to patients and adding further weight to the ‘it’s all in your mind’ narrative. 

Here is one woman’s story of the Lightning Process that has left her bedbound, unable to speak, sit up or swallow since 2008: 

http://www.jkrowbory.co.uk/2017/09/when-you-beckon-lightning-and-invite-it-in-for-tea/

http://www.meassociation.org.uk/2017/09/me-association-statement-lightning-process-and-smile-trial-in-young-people-with-mecfs-19-september-2017/

Interestingly, treatment comprising of Graded Exercise have now been quietly removed from US health guidelines, as they’ve recognised that they are inappropriate and harmful. 

 4.     PROVE YOURSELF WORTHY OF BEING BELIEVED

 Imagine being so terribly ill and being told you’re lying or having to prove that something is wrong. This is ME.

Due to what is briefly outlined above, getting help and support, medically, financially, even relationally can often be another huge battle facing those already battling serious ill health.

Those in establishment, namely renowned psychiatrists, who have been most keen to keep ME labelled as CFS and as a psychosomatic or emotional disorder, have long since overruled all other voices to form the very defiant ceiling of dismissal around ME, meaning access to any non-psychological treatment is slim or has to be literally begged for.

 The NICE guidelines state use of drugs, such as anti-virals don’t work (proved otherwise across the world in trials and in the minority of patients who can access them) nor is there any point testing extensively for abnormalities in the body. 

Other advisory material given to medical professionals regarding ME encourage doctors not to refer their patients even with serious developing additional symptoms, causing many cases where cancer, heart disease, thyroid problems etc. are not tested for, acknowledged or treated in time.

GPs are encouraged to accept what the patient says but not to encourage ‘illness beliefs’ i.e., don’t engage proactively with their concerns.  A+E guidelines for diseases such as ME are simply not to take the patient seriously (even in a common seizure/paralysis/breathing difficulty scenario) and to assume symptoms are somatic and to not waste resources on them.

Patients who are severely ill and housebound or bedbound are routinely ignored and denied access to medical care. Even if requests are granted, the stigma of ME runs so far and wide that even further referrals will often end in further shame and another discharge.

It must be said that there are some doctors willing to listen, to be educated by their patients and refer on but they are few and far between.

80% of housebound patients are refused home visits from their GP and 65% of patients felt they had been offered no advice on how to proceed after diagnosis. (2001 report for Action for ME)

And it must also be said that most doctors just do not understand. They are simply not trained in ME in medical school. They are not educated in physical abnormalities and established research of ME and are simply following the guidelines put in place.

 Refusal to participate in harmful treatment programmes can mean the refusal of any further offers of help or financial help via DWP. There are cases of people refusing Graded Exercise, knowing how harmful it is and being told they do not want to be well and therefore do not qualify. Indeed, very few people with ME are granted benefits without appealing because of the Psychosomatic, ‘non-illness’ label.

And at the extreme end, refusal of treatment can lead to being sectioned or removed from a family home (more on this below). http://www.sophiaandme.org.uk/sophia%20&%20m.e.%20her%20story.html

This all means many patients give up begging for medical help, due to repeated malignment, humiliation and genuine fear as to how they will be assessed. I personally am terrified of doctors from my own experiences and each interaction trying to get any help is daunting and exhausting, involves pages of print outs to plead with someone to take me seriously and still is usually highly unproductive.

 This void of information and training is leaving many suffering alone for years or decades, totally neglected and unaccounted for. 

And it also leaves open a wide window of opportunity for money-makers, quack therapies and secretive, expensive treatments as desperate people without help search for their recovery. This often leads to more financial pressure, emotionally draining experiences and further disappointment as miracle cures prove unmiraculous.

A handful of ME specialists around the world offer more hope but still have no cure.

 It is hard to place enough emphasis on the effects of not being believed or treated; of continued disbelief and trivializing of such serious illness. Many sufferers agree that the stigma and helplessness they feel from being left to cope alone  is as painful as the illness itself.

The NICE guidelines are not due to be changed until 2020. 

And who indeed will be reviewing those guidelines?  It must include patient groups, recognised researchers, doctors who have had success treating patients. Not a repeat of the current fiasco. 

 We find it hard to believe that in the U.K., where we are privileged to receive outstanding healthcare via the NHS, that this could be the case. Mistreatment is much slicker and more implicit these days, after years of enforcing the lies, but it is still inexcusably cruel and unacceptable, even when delivered by unknowing professionals.

5.     THE POWER IN THE WRONG HANDS HAS LED TO UNJUST TREATMENT AND ABUSE OF PATIENTS AND HARRASSMENT OF GENUINELY COMPASSIONATE DOCTORS AND SUCCESSFUL RESEARCHERS.

The psychiatrists who rule the ME narrative are part of the medical establishment and have so far been deemed untouchable in this debate. (Simon Wesley of Kings College London has even been chosen by Theresa May to lead an independent review of the Mental Health Act, received with much criticism by many professionals both in and outside of the ME community. ://www.thecanary.co/discovery/2017/10/18/dozens-leading-professionals-just-slammed-theresa-mays-controversial-new-mental-health-guru-letter/  )

This group of psychiatrists have also gained financially from advising the Department of Work and Pensions and insurance companies in how to treat ME sufferers (in summary, it’s not real, they can work if they choose, no benefits or insurance needed)

The DWP (who save millions with the help of this ‘fake illness’ standpoint) in return funded the psychiatrists’ £5million, highly flawed PACE trial, continuing a circle of gratuitous back scratching and neglect of sufferers. 

 They also have profound influence over the Science Media Centre, controlling the ongoing media trivialisation and the unhelpful, repeated ‘It may be real after all!’ headline, fueling the question mark over sufferers’ mental health for years and years, keeping the true devastation of ME hidden. 

 “They keep on recommending harmful treatments, based on manipulated trials, conducted by people with a conflict of interest” (Brenda Vreeswijk)

That’s why another project, the MAIMES campaign (Medical Abuse in ME sufferers) is so important. It is calling for a public enquiry to address this. 

https://youtu.be/LasPOnRx1Ek

Here is a 10-minute clip by Dr Myhill, one of a handful of doctors in U.K., who has practiced outside “the narrow confines of conventional medicine” re ME, to “diagnose properly, establish underlying mechanisms and treat patients”. She’s been investigated more times than other any doctor, had her work sabotaged and eventually went into private practice, to allow her to continue to try to be effective in this field.   

The Establishment’s main concern of Dr Myhill’s work was that “all of the patients appear to be improving and none are likely to complain about their treatment” * (internal GMC memo, 2006), which is really very illuminating! 

Her refusal to abide by the non-successful, incorrect, gaslighting, psychological treatment guidelines caused much anger. 

(* From Diagnosis and treatment of CFS and ME: it’s mitochondria, not hypochondria: Sarah Myhill) 

 Other doctors trying to help their ME patients, by following biomedical research and treating ME rightly as a physical disease, are often harassed, taken to court and/or have their licenses revoked.

Researchers have had their work shut down when they discover considerable evidence. The film ‘Forgotten Plague’ documents part of this story well.  http://www.forgottenplague.com/

 Grants applied for in the area of ME or CFS are routinely turned down and some of those who have been part of uncovering the PACE trial debacle were threatened not to report their findings by the medical establishment. 

 In order to see improvement in the treatment of ME, the current guidelines and most influential voices need to be removed from the very top, to make way for believing, scientifically based, concise responses.

Significant change will not happen any other way. 

6.     RESEARCH PROVES THE PHYSIOLOGICAL PROCESS OF ME AND NEEDS MORE FUNDING

As stated above, there are over 8000 papers detailing the causes or abnormalities in ME. Some of these papers are decades old. As Nancy Klimas, from the Institute of Neuro-Immune Medicine, quotes in Unrest, very blatant signs of acquired immune deficiency were found in patients all the way back in the 1980’s. The evidence has always been there.

Other research is relatively new and still painfully underfunded.

Problems in energy production, inflammation, increased lactic acid production, ongoing infection, brain abnormalities or signs of brain injury, decreased blood volume, central nervous system dysfunction, cerebrospinal altercations, low cardiac output have all been found and that is a much shortened list.

So far, this research is side swept or too small, due to the lack of funding. Contrary to the Establishment’s psychiatrists who claim that ‘militant, angry, uncooperative patients’ scare researchers away, it is in fact the case that the biggest funds for ME/CFS research goes predominantly towards their own biopsychosocial model of work (with Esther Crawley apparently receiving the biggest grants for therapy trials such as the Lightning Process).

A lot of biomedical research is funded by patients themselves or fundraisers as they involve themselves in attempts to find answers.

Recently, the NIH has awarded four ME research centres in the U.S $7 million to further coordinate research. This is still a tiny amount considering the scale and severity of illness, but it is heading in the right direction. Sadly, it means noteworthy scientists such as Ron Davis still receive no grants for their potentially enlightening projects, which could lead to diagnostic tools and treatments. (Ron Davis now receives funding only via The Open Medicine Foundation, see link below) p>

https://www.healthrising.org/blog/2017/09/30/three-nih-funded-mecfs-research-centers-controversy/

There’s also been a 2.1 million investment from the US into UK research, looking at immune changes and genetic profiles.

More research is desperately, desperately needed to find the cause and to treat and cure ME.

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/a-disease-that-cries-out-for-research-as-many-suffer_us_59970401e4b033e0fbdec35a

 7.     THE TRAGEDY OF ME OFTEN ENDS IN DEATH AND IS SHROUDED IN SECRECY

People do die from ME, either from organ failure, being left untreated, secondary causes that go unnoticed in the lack of care or from suicide.

Suicide is often the last resort of those left abandoned, without hope, stigmatised and destitute and has little to do with mental health. Many spend their life feeling they may die at any point. http://www.shoutoutaboutme.com/ab out-me/7293/

 There are no official figures for deaths from ME, which in itself speaks of the neglect and disregard for human suffering in ME.

 Carers of deceased ME sufferers have been threatened with action if they publicise biopsy results. Probably because they show the amount of physical suffering, infection, inflammation etc. etc. that is really present in ME. And that show some people die prematurely from ME without treatment. 

http://www.ncf-net.org/forum/Autopsy.htm

 On the same note, ME sufferers are not allowed to give blood, which is strange if I only think I’m ill due to my incorrect beliefs! Surely my blood is fine?  This is likely due to there being much secrecy around outbreaks of ME, with links to possible airborne viruses or serious blood infections. You see, the truth about ME is really known at government level and has been buried for a long, long time in a huge and financially convenient cover up. 

8.     FAMILIES ARE TORN APART

Children with ME have been and still often are placed on child protection registers or removed from their homes due to the biopsychosocial model of ME. They are not believed, not heard and often damaged further, receiving little support as agencies, schools etc. are not taught how seriously ill they are. Parents are led to believe their child is lying or alternatively the parent is blamed for their perceived ill health.

There are hundreds of these cases. Jane Colby of the Tymes Trust explains the current challenges and specific mistreatment of children here: http://www.tymestrust.org/pdfs/childprotectionissues.pdf Adults have died after being forcibly removed, from their homes and sectioned into mental health institutions, where conditions and accusations exacerbate frail ME bodies.

Children have been bullied and abused, thrown into swimming pools to prove they’re faking illness, verbally insulted, hurled out of wheelchairs etc. etc. etc.

http://voicesfromtheshadowsfilm.co.uk/welcome/reflections/

9.     THE PRICE OF ADVOCACY AND THE NEED FOR SUPPORT

Most advocacy is still done by ME sufferers themselves. For example, films like Unrest are funded by ME sufferers, petitions are organized by sufferers and research is often, at least in part, funded by them,

One key example is the Freedom of Information pursuits re the PACE trial which were initially undertaken by an M.E. sufferer, Allem Matthees, now bedridden still months and months later, due to the over exertion of attempting to see truth exposed. That act of advocacy saw much opposition to releasing the flawed data and has only been brought to light because of the initial request of that one courageous man (and followed by many other advocates) , leading to the NICE guidelines now being reviewed.

 These are people desperate to live, trying to survive and be well, heard and no longer mistreated. They are not the abusive militants or the lazy miserable victims, refusing help that are so often depicted. 

They, we, need other voices and other people who understand ME. 

Who see the injustice and speak out and support their efforts.

There are people who have campaigned for years and years and years from their beds; people who have never recovered who keep fighting or who have tragically died in their 30’s and beyond, leaving behind legacies of fighting for their fellow sufferers; sufferers who used every last drop of strength to try to educate and help people and fellow sufferers understand the illness.

 Jodi Bassett (http://www.hfme.org/abouthfme.htm ) and Emily Collinridge (http://www.severeme.info/about-emily.htm) are two such incredibly ill but brave,dedicated advocates, who both died in their 30’s and left behind valuable wealths of information.

10.  IT REALLY IS TIME FOR UNREST

So many thousands of sufferers have lived through everything mentioned above.

And it is unacceptable and horrific to think of future generations suffering in the same way.

Indeed, if this was the case for another serious illness we understood better, it would have caused an outcry long, long ago. But that is historically how illnesses and diseases are treated until they’re understood.

 This lack of recognition, this very suffocating, enforced encroaching of defiant dismissal, leaves patients without access to medical help-a very scary factor when you feel like you are totally obliterated; it leaves them isolated from society; it leaves sufferers so fragile they cannot see friends or tolerate life.

It depletes already sick bodies with piled-on blame, shame, constant explanations, constant appeals for medical help and worry. And it creates an ongoing exhausting, often non-sensical battle to try to somehow live, whilst simultaneously being told they don’t want to get well or didn’t try hard enough.

 There are just Inexpressible amounts of grief, frustration, sorrow, loneliness and desperation in dealing with ME.

It will be a marvellous day when decades of advocacy taken on by ME sufferers themselves sparks a change; when it is recognised and treated so patients no longer must live through what is rightly called abuse and neglect. 

When sufferers of ME can just use their little energy to just get well rather than fight for care because others have been exposed to the truth and fight on their behalf. 

I think there is momentum right now to see this injustice smashed apart. But it still needs lots of information, educating and support. 

 Thanks for reading and supporting the cause. You can follow my ME ME ME Facebook page for more thoughts, stories and information here: https://m.facebook.com/MEMEMEwords/ And twitter: caro_gblom p>

More information and ways to support can be found here:

http://www.meaction.net/

http://www.meassociation.org.uk/

http://www.tymestrust.org/  (supporting children and their families with ME)

http://www.meresearch.org.uk/

www.investinme.org http://www.omf.ngo“>www.omf.ngo

[preciousmetals0]

Trump Touts Containment; Investors Ain’t Having It

Trump Touts Containment; Investors Ain’t Having It:

Going to California

There was an attempt last night to assuage growing coronavirus fears in the U.S. But that attempt went over like a lead balloon.

Following the fifth consecutive drop in U.S. markets, President Donald Trump expressed a whole lotta love for the nation. Trump assured everyone: “Because of all we’ve done the risk to the American people remains very low.”

“We have quarantined those infected and those at risk,” he said. “We are rapidly developing a vaccine. The vaccine is coming along well.”

Unfortunately for Trump, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) announced that not quite everyone was quarantined in the U.S. The CDC revealed the discovery of a patient with no direct ties to the coronavirus’s immigrant song outbreak.

In other words, this particular infection didn’t come from over the hills and far away … it was home-grown near San Francisco, California.

News of the unrelated outbreak hit Wall Street hard today, sparking another sharp sell-off. Investors are particularly concerned that, when the levee breaks on the coronavirus in the U.S., the economy could face a recession … one that even central bankers will be unable to fix.

But President Trump is no fool in the rain. He provided no quarter for the outlook on the COVID-19 outbreak in the U.S.

“There’s a chance it could get worse; there’s a chance it could get fairly substantially worse, but nothing’s inevitable,” the president said.

The Takeaway: 

Nothing’s inevitable? Death and taxes would like to have a word with you, President Trump.

I won’t ramble on about the coronavirus like I have in the past. With more than 10 years gone, the bull market is sick again. Very sick.

The Dow has plunged more than 9% in the past four days, setting Wall Street’s favorite barometer back to levels last seen in October 2019. The Dow’s next line in the sand appears to be the 25,750 to 26,000 region.

This area is home to the Dow’s October 2019 lows and could provide short-term support for stocks.

So, if you’re looking for a short-term positive for the broader market, that’d be it. A move below 25,750 would be a heartbreaker for the market and a potential sign that things will get much worse.

Right now, you might be dazed and confused, wondering: “Hey … hey, what can I do?”

If you’re a regular Great Stuff reader, you already know what to do. Continue moving out of riskier, aggressive investments — like that winger you took on Virgin Galactic Holdings Inc. (NYSE: SPCE) — and get yourself into more conservative investments … such as gold or bonds.

If you’re not sure what is and what should never be when it comes to investing in gold and bonds, the iShares 20+ Year Treasury Bond ETF (Nasdaq: TLT) and the SPDR Gold Trust (NYSE: GLD) exchange-traded funds (ETFs) are great places to start.

But, if you’re feeling particularly trampled underfoot with the market sell-off, there’s no reason to visit the gallows pole. The experts at Banyan Hill are here to guide you through Wall Street’s communication breakdown!

For instance, it doesn’t matter if the market experiences good times, bad times … you know we’ve all had our share … mega tech trends such as 5G and electric vehicles aren’t down for the count. No sirree, Bob!

If you invest in the right mega tech trend stocks, your time is gonna come, and Ian King’s Automatic Fortunes can help get you there.

You can find out more about Ian’s tech trend research here.

But… (And there’s always a but, isn’t there?)

If this virus shebang has you fighting the battle of evermore, you don’t want to miss out on what may turn into a prime time to buy. In that case, Jeff Yastine’s research is just what the plague doctor ordered.

Jeff knows how to spot standout companies trading for pennies on the dollar — and there are a lot of those out there right now.

You can find out more about Jeff’s research by clicking right here.

Going: Penney for Your Thoughts

If you had told me yesterday that J.C. Penney Co. Inc. (NYSE: JCP) would be one of today’s hottest stocks … I’d have probably called you crazy. And yet, here we are … watching JCP shares rally amid another Wall Street bloodbath.

The department store hasn’t had the best track record in the earnings confessional in the past year, but Santa Claus apparently took pity on Penney. The company reported a surprise fourth-quarter profit of $0.13 per share, blowing away consensus expectations for a loss of $0.06 per share.

Revenue was also better than expected, falling 7.9% to $3.49 billion, but it still arrived ahead of Wall Street’s $3.38 billion target. Same-store sales dropped 7% on the quarter but were better than the expected 7.3% decline.

Finally, Penney indicated that the worst may have finally passed in its turnaround efforts. The retailer forecast same-store sales to fall a mild 3.5% to 4.5% for 2020, halving the consensus target for a 7.7% decline.

Clearly, J.C. Penney isn’t out of the woods just yet, but it’s finally making some headway. If the company can continue to progress with turnaround plans amid the coronavirus outbreak, it may finally be time to take Penney seriously again.

Going: Be Best

Strong prior-quarter results are no longer enough to cut it in this coronavirus world. Just ask Best Buy Co. Inc. (NYSE: BBY).

The big-box electronics retailer reported strong fourth-quarter results. Earnings rose 7% to $2.90 per share, while revenue sallied 3% higher to $15.2 billion. Both figures easily topped analyst expectations.

Best Buy’s earnings and revenue beats are even more impressive when you consider the company’s 2019 struggles with Chinese tariffs and the trade war. Best Buy has an extensive supply chain in China.

But it’s out of the fire and into the frying pan, with the coronavirus sweeping across China like a Mongol horde. “As we enter fiscal 2021, we are closely monitoring the developments related to the coronavirus outbreak,” said Chief Financial Officer Matt Bilunas.

Best Buy expects 2020 earnings of $6.20 per share on sales of $43.8 billion. “Our guidance ranges for both Q1 and the full year reflect our best estimates of the [coronavirus] impacts at this time,” noted Bilunas.

Both figures were well below Wall Street’s expectations — which seems odd, considering that analysts know Best Buy’s China situation. Personally, I see this as more proof that Wall Street hasn’t completely accepted the full potential impact of the virus.

Keep an eye on Best Buy. The company is strong and well-run, meaning you could find a diamond in the rough if you jump on BBY shares at the right time.

Gone: Shut the Windows

And the list continues to grow…

Last week, I told you about how Apple Inc. (Nasdaq: AAPL) was the canary in the coal mine regarding coronavirus warnings. Today, Microsoft Corp. (Nasdaq: MSFT) joined the party.

“Although we see strong Windows demand in line with our expectations, the supply chain is returning to normal operations at a slower pace than anticipated at the time of our Q2 earnings call,” the company said in a statement. That second-quarter earnings call was just last month. My, how quickly things can change.

So, what’s the impact? The company says that its personal computing, Windows and Surface sales will not be up to snuff due to the virus outbreak. Microsoft’s personal computing unit accounted for 36% of total revenue last quarter, meaning that a slowdown here could materially hamper current-quarter results.

MSFT shares were punished hard for the warning, but ol’ Softy will be back — you can bet on that. Remember, Microsoft is the company that outlived the dot-com bust … and several other market disasters along the way.

That’s right, Great Stuff readers … this sell-off in MSFT is a buying opportunity. Maybe not right now. The market has a pretty nasty cold. But if you hold MSFT, there’s no reason to sell. In fact, look for opportunities to buy … just be careful about when.

Rabble, rabble, rabble. It’s time for Great Stuff readers to babble!

Welcome to your weekly Reader Feedback!

This week, we asked you for your thoughts on Warren Buffett, the market and the coronavirus. So, let’s get things kickin’, shall we?

China’s West Province

Howz it goin’!

– Don’t follow Buffett, he makes most of his money selling puts, or he just buys the companies, or he waits for the leeches to come to him and rips them off … lol.

– If Trump is still president, S&P 500 will be up.

– If you mean corona viral market, I have my own gauge. When hundreds of infections start showing up here in China’s west province … British Columbia, Canada … lol (sad but true ), then I’ll start worrying ’cause there has to be a few full 747s coming in daily.

– Like your newsletter, read it every night.

Keep up the good work.

Cheers!

Tony D.

Here’s a guy who followed this week’s assignment to the letter. You get an A+, Tony.

I, too, will start to really worry when hundreds of infections start showing up in North America. With today’s news of a spreading infection near San Francisco, I’m thinking you might get pinched from below … instead of air-dropped from Chinese 747s.

Stay safe, brother, and thanks for reading Great Stuff!

Plug Into Options

Hi, I really enjoy Great Stuff, and Profits Unlimited has made me some money. Would Joseph like any comments on Tesla from an options trader?

Gary F.

’Sup, Gary! So, you want to trade Tesla Inc. (Nasdaq: TSLA) options … hmmm. You know, you haven’t picked the best market time to consider this option, right? Volatility is through the roof right now. That means that Tesla options (heck, all options) are a bit expensive.

Thirty-day volatility on TSLA right now is higher than 90% of all readings taken in the past year. In layman’s terms, that’s pretty high, and TSLA options are expensive.

Remember, Gary, options trading is not for the faint of heart. And your strategy depends on what you want to get out of the trade. Are you looking to own Tesla stock at a lower price? Or, are you looking to profit from TSLA’s decline or rally?

Basic options strategies like buying calls or puts are going to be rough in a high-volatility environment. You’ll pay a lot and miss out on returns because of it. But, if I were forced to trade TSLA options, I would probably look at short-term puts … maybe in April or May, just to give myself some breathing room.

But that’s only if I were forced to trade TSLA options. I’m not forced, so I won’t.

By the way, Gary, I see you have Profits Unlimited … did you know that Paul Mampilly also has an options trading research service? If you’re interested in TSLA options, you should really check out Rebound Profit Trader.

You can find out more by clicking here.

All right, Gary wore me out. I’m sorry if I didn’t get to your question today. I’ll try to hit you up next week, so keep writing in!

And if you haven’t written in yet … what’s stopping you? Drop me a line at GreatStuffToday@banyanhill.com, and let me know how you’re doing out there in this crazy market.

That’s a wrap for today. But if you’re still craving more Great Stuff, you can check us out on social media: Facebook and Twitter.

Until next time, good trading!

Regards,

Joseph Hargett

Editor, Great Stuff

[goldira01]

Going to California

There was an attempt last night to assuage growing coronavirus fears in the U.S. But that attempt went over like a lead balloon.

Following the fifth consecutive drop in U.S. markets, President Donald Trump expressed a whole lotta love for the nation. Trump assured everyone: “Because of all we’ve done the risk to the American people remains very low.”

“We have quarantined those infected and those at risk,” he said. “We are rapidly developing a vaccine. The vaccine is coming along well.”

Unfortunately for Trump, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) announced that not quite everyone was quarantined in the U.S. The CDC revealed the discovery of a patient with no direct ties to the coronavirus’s immigrant song outbreak.

In other words, this particular infection didn’t come from over the hills and far away … it was home-grown near San Francisco, California.

News of the unrelated outbreak hit Wall Street hard today, sparking another sharp sell-off. Investors are particularly concerned that, when the levee breaks on the coronavirus in the U.S., the economy could face a recession … one that even central bankers will be unable to fix.

But President Trump is no fool in the rain. He provided no quarter for the outlook on the COVID-19 outbreak in the U.S.

“There’s a chance it could get worse; there’s a chance it could get fairly substantially worse, but nothing’s inevitable,” the president said.

The Takeaway: 

Nothing’s inevitable? Death and taxes would like to have a word with you, President Trump.

I won’t ramble on about the coronavirus like I have in the past. With more than 10 years gone, the bull market is sick again. Very sick.

The Dow has plunged more than 9% in the past four days, setting Wall Street’s favorite barometer back to levels last seen in October 2019. The Dow’s next line in the sand appears to be the 25,750 to 26,000 region.

This area is home to the Dow’s October 2019 lows and could provide short-term support for stocks.

So, if you’re looking for a short-term positive for the broader market, that’d be it. A move below 25,750 would be a heartbreaker for the market and a potential sign that things will get much worse.

Right now, you might be dazed and confused, wondering: “Hey … hey, what can I do?”

If you’re a regular Great Stuff reader, you already know what to do. Continue moving out of riskier, aggressive investments — like that winger you took on Virgin Galactic Holdings Inc. (NYSE: SPCE) — and get yourself into more conservative investments … such as gold or bonds.

If you’re not sure what is and what should never be when it comes to investing in gold and bonds, the iShares 20+ Year Treasury Bond ETF (Nasdaq: TLT) and the SPDR Gold Trust (NYSE: GLD) exchange-traded funds (ETFs) are great places to start.

But, if you’re feeling particularly trampled underfoot with the market sell-off, there’s no reason to visit the gallows pole. The experts at Banyan Hill are here to guide you through Wall Street’s communication breakdown!

For instance, it doesn’t matter if the market experiences good times, bad times … you know we’ve all had our share … mega tech trends such as 5G and electric vehicles aren’t down for the count. No sirree, Bob!

If you invest in the right mega tech trend stocks, your time is gonna come, and Ian King’s Automatic Fortunes can help get you there.

You can find out more about Ian’s tech trend research here.

But… (And there’s always a but, isn’t there?)

If this virus shebang has you fighting the battle of evermore, you don’t want to miss out on what may turn into a prime time to buy. In that case, Jeff Yastine’s research is just what the plague doctor ordered.

Jeff knows how to spot standout companies trading for pennies on the dollar — and there are a lot of those out there right now.

You can find out more about Jeff’s research by clicking right here.

Going: Penney for Your Thoughts

If you had told me yesterday that J.C. Penney Co. Inc. (NYSE: JCP) would be one of today’s hottest stocks … I’d have probably called you crazy. And yet, here we are … watching JCP shares rally amid another Wall Street bloodbath.

The department store hasn’t had the best track record in the earnings confessional in the past year, but Santa Claus apparently took pity on Penney. The company reported a surprise fourth-quarter profit of $0.13 per share, blowing away consensus expectations for a loss of $0.06 per share.

Revenue was also better than expected, falling 7.9% to $3.49 billion, but it still arrived ahead of Wall Street’s $3.38 billion target. Same-store sales dropped 7% on the quarter but were better than the expected 7.3% decline.

Finally, Penney indicated that the worst may have finally passed in its turnaround efforts. The retailer forecast same-store sales to fall a mild 3.5% to 4.5% for 2020, halving the consensus target for a 7.7% decline.

Clearly, J.C. Penney isn’t out of the woods just yet, but it’s finally making some headway. If the company can continue to progress with turnaround plans amid the coronavirus outbreak, it may finally be time to take Penney seriously again.

Going: Be Best

Strong prior-quarter results are no longer enough to cut it in this coronavirus world. Just ask Best Buy Co. Inc. (NYSE: BBY).

The big-box electronics retailer reported strong fourth-quarter results. Earnings rose 7% to $2.90 per share, while revenue sallied 3% higher to $15.2 billion. Both figures easily topped analyst expectations.

Best Buy’s earnings and revenue beats are even more impressive when you consider the company’s 2019 struggles with Chinese tariffs and the trade war. Best Buy has an extensive supply chain in China.

But it’s out of the fire and into the frying pan, with the coronavirus sweeping across China like a Mongol horde. “As we enter fiscal 2021, we are closely monitoring the developments related to the coronavirus outbreak,” said Chief Financial Officer Matt Bilunas.

Best Buy expects 2020 earnings of $6.20 per share on sales of $43.8 billion. “Our guidance ranges for both Q1 and the full year reflect our best estimates of the [coronavirus] impacts at this time,” noted Bilunas.

Both figures were well below Wall Street’s expectations — which seems odd, considering that analysts know Best Buy’s China situation. Personally, I see this as more proof that Wall Street hasn’t completely accepted the full potential impact of the virus.

Keep an eye on Best Buy. The company is strong and well-run, meaning you could find a diamond in the rough if you jump on BBY shares at the right time.

Gone: Shut the Windows

And the list continues to grow…

Last week, I told you about how Apple Inc. (Nasdaq: AAPL) was the canary in the coal mine regarding coronavirus warnings. Today, Microsoft Corp. (Nasdaq: MSFT) joined the party.

“Although we see strong Windows demand in line with our expectations, the supply chain is returning to normal operations at a slower pace than anticipated at the time of our Q2 earnings call,” the company said in a statement. That second-quarter earnings call was just last month. My, how quickly things can change.

So, what’s the impact? The company says that its personal computing, Windows and Surface sales will not be up to snuff due to the virus outbreak. Microsoft’s personal computing unit accounted for 36% of total revenue last quarter, meaning that a slowdown here could materially hamper current-quarter results.

MSFT shares were punished hard for the warning, but ol’ Softy will be back — you can bet on that. Remember, Microsoft is the company that outlived the dot-com bust … and several other market disasters along the way.

That’s right, Great Stuff readers … this sell-off in MSFT is a buying opportunity. Maybe not right now. The market has a pretty nasty cold. But if you hold MSFT, there’s no reason to sell. In fact, look for opportunities to buy … just be careful about when.

Rabble, rabble, rabble. It’s time for Great Stuff readers to babble!

Welcome to your weekly Reader Feedback!

This week, we asked you for your thoughts on Warren Buffett, the market and the coronavirus. So, let’s get things kickin’, shall we?

China’s West Province

Howz it goin’!

– Don’t follow Buffett, he makes most of his money selling puts, or he just buys the companies, or he waits for the leeches to come to him and rips them off … lol.

– If Trump is still president, S&P 500 will be up.

– If you mean corona viral market, I have my own gauge. When hundreds of infections start showing up here in China’s west province … British Columbia, Canada … lol (sad but true ), then I’ll start worrying ’cause there has to be a few full 747s coming in daily.

– Like your newsletter, read it every night.

Keep up the good work.

Cheers!

Tony D.

Here’s a guy who followed this week’s assignment to the letter. You get an A+, Tony.

I, too, will start to really worry when hundreds of infections start showing up in North America. With today’s news of a spreading infection near San Francisco, I’m thinking you might get pinched from below … instead of air-dropped from Chinese 747s.

Stay safe, brother, and thanks for reading Great Stuff!

Plug Into Options

Hi, I really enjoy Great Stuff, and Profits Unlimited has made me some money. Would Joseph like any comments on Tesla from an options trader?

Gary F.

’Sup, Gary! So, you want to trade Tesla Inc. (Nasdaq: TSLA) options … hmmm. You know, you haven’t picked the best market time to consider this option, right? Volatility is through the roof right now. That means that Tesla options (heck, all options) are a bit expensive.

Thirty-day volatility on TSLA right now is higher than 90% of all readings taken in the past year. In layman’s terms, that’s pretty high, and TSLA options are expensive.

Remember, Gary, options trading is not for the faint of heart. And your strategy depends on what you want to get out of the trade. Are you looking to own Tesla stock at a lower price? Or, are you looking to profit from TSLA’s decline or rally?

Basic options strategies like buying calls or puts are going to be rough in a high-volatility environment. You’ll pay a lot and miss out on returns because of it. But, if I were forced to trade TSLA options, I would probably look at short-term puts … maybe in April or May, just to give myself some breathing room.

But that’s only if I were forced to trade TSLA options. I’m not forced, so I won’t.

By the way, Gary, I see you have Profits Unlimited … did you know that Paul Mampilly also has an options trading research service? If you’re interested in TSLA options, you should really check out Rebound Profit Trader.

You can find out more by clicking here.

All right, Gary wore me out. I’m sorry if I didn’t get to your question today. I’ll try to hit you up next week, so keep writing in!

And if you haven’t written in yet … what’s stopping you? Drop me a line at GreatStuffToday@banyanhill.com, and let me know how you’re doing out there in this crazy market.

That’s a wrap for today. But if you’re still craving more Great Stuff, you can check us out on social media: Facebook and Twitter.

Until next time, good trading!

Regards,

Joseph Hargett

Editor, Great Stuff

[dinafbrownil]

UVA Doctors Decry Aggressive Billing Practices By Their Own Hospital

Prominent doctors at UVA Health System are expressing public outrage at their employer’s practices to collect unpaid medical debt from its patients.

A Kaiser Health News report in September that showed UVA sued 36,000 patients over six years for more than $100 million, seizing wages and savings and even pushing families into bankruptcy.

Special Reports

Investigation

'UVA Has Ruined Us': Health System Sues Thousands Of Patients, Seizing Paychecks And Claiming Homes

By Jay Hancock and Elizabeth Lucas Sep 10

Over six years, the state institution filed 36,000 lawsuits against patients seeking a total of more than $106 million in unpaid bills, a KHN analysis finds.

Like many physicians who work at U.S. medical centers, the UVA doctors said they had little idea how aggressively the hospital where they practice was billing and pursuing their patients for payment.

Although the health system has announced some interim measures to scale back collections practices, some of the system’s most senior physicians are now calling for UVA to stop suing its patients altogether. And they are urging the pursuit of an “immediate solution” to address the national epidemic of health care debt.

“We were appalled by the revelations of the aggressive, pitiless billing and collections practices” at UVA, Dr. Scott Heysell and two other senior staff members wrote in a letter to KHN published Saturday. “We felt betrayed,” they wrote, “and we had, by extension, betrayed those who had relied on us.”

Heysell, an infectious-disease specialist and associate professor at UVA School of Medicine, and his co-authors echoed other UVA researchers and clinicians contacted by a reporter who said they were surprised and dismayed by the health system’s practices.

UVA initially defended its practices, pointing to the Virginia Debt Collection Act of 1988, which requires state agencies to “aggressively collect” money owed. But within days of the KHN report, UVA said it would reduce its use of the courts and make it easier for patients to qualify for financial assistance.

That’s not enough, said the letter’s authors, who include Dr. Rebecca Dillingham, director of UVA’s Center for Global Health, and Dr. Michael Williams, director of the UVA Center for Health Policy.

They ask “why UVA cannot join other public hospitals that have effectively stopped suing patients altogether?”

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Other University of Virginia faculty said the system’s practices undermined their efforts to improve care for middle- and lower-income families and was not in keeping with an ethos of putting patients first.

KHN’s findings “made me feel utterly hypocritical about my work and efforts to promote health equity,” Rajesh Balkrishnan, a UVA public health professor who researches cancer treatment in Appalachia, said in an interview.

“This is a public university with one of the richest endowments in the country,” he said. At least take care of the immediate community you serve.”

In September, UVA Health said it would “reduce our reliance on the legal system,” suing patients only if their household income is more than 400% of the federal poverty level, or $103,000 for a family of four. It also pledged to increase discounts for the uninsured and upgrade its financial assistance for patients.

Those measures are “a first step,” it said. On Oct. 28, it named an advisory council of community leaders, patient advocates and UVA students and staff to consider further changes.

“We are continuing to thoughtfully review our billing and collection practices to find additional ways to better serve our patient as well as improve fairness and transparency,” said UVA Health spokesman Eric Swensen. “We are looking at all options to achieve these goals.”

Virginia Gov. Ralph Northam, who oversees the state’s university system and public hospitals, is a pediatric neurologist.

“As a doctor himself, Gov. Northam agrees with the doctors who have taken a stand against unfair and aggressive medical billing practices,” his spokeswoman said. “Much more can and should be done to address this issue.”

KHN’s report prompted discussions across the campus in Charlottesville about how to treat uninsured patients or those with coverage who still struggle with thousands of dollars in out-of-pocket expenses, doctors and faculty said.

“No physician wants to be responsible for bankrupting a patient — not one physician, not one patient,” said Dr. Mohan Nadkarni, UVA’s chief of general internal medicine. He is the only physician on the advisory council.

“UVA physicians were completely taken aback by the scale and magnitude of the collections practices,” Nadkarni said. Discussion at the council’s first meeting reflected “lots of pent-up dissatisfaction from community leaders” about UVA’s practices, he said.

But many knew the health system was suing patients, they said. Some had firsthand experience with aggressive tactics from the billing office.

At one “town meeting” of health system employees, held at UVA’s Leonard Sandridge Auditorium in response to KHN’s report, somebody took the mic and asked, “Who in this room has been taken to collections by UVA?” said Matthew Gillikin, a speech therapist who was there. A third to half the people raised their hands, he said.

Court data analyzed by KHN showed that UVA Health was suing about 100 of its employees every year.

Also at the town meetings, “we heard many agonizing stories of patients and employees having been sued or having wages garnished,” Nadkarni said. “We heard loud and clear from many physicians that they heavily supported significant liberalization” of UVA Health’s financial assistance policies.

Family physician Dr. Alex Salomon, who worked at UVA for seven years and now is with Augusta Health in Fishersville, Va., had “a lot of patients” with UVA bill and lawsuit problems, many who had insurance but could not make out-of-pocket payments, he said. Still, he added, “I didn’t realize UVA was so much worse” than other hospitals.

As part of the University of Virginia, UVA Health is a state institution that is not subject to taxation. UVA Medical Center, the system’s flagship hospital, made a $91 million operating profit on revenue of $1.8 billion in the fiscal year ending in June and held stocks, bonds and other investments worth about $1 billion.

Doctors are realizing that financial barriers to treatment and budget squeezes from bills can be as harmful to patients as disease, said Dr. Marty Makary, a surgeon and researcher at Johns Hopkins Medicine who studies hospital debt collection and is urging UVA alumni to press for further change.

“I have not talked to a single patient or student of UVA or faculty member or alumni who thinks it is reasonable for the hospital to sue patients who cannot afford their bill,” he said.

News of UVA collections practices served as a teaching moment for at least one class.

“Many of the students in my class work for the UVA Health System, so the recent media coverage about UVA’s billing practices has been painful for them as nurses who care deeply about the patients and families they serve,” Kimberly Acquaviva, a professor who teaches health policy at UVA’s nursing school, tweeted in September. “As a class, we talked about the power that nurses have to shape the lives of the patients and families” by advocating for system change, she said.

She declined a request for an interview, as did five other doctors or professors. Several referred a reporter to UVA spokesman Swensen. About 20 others did not respond to interview requests.

Dr. Chris Ghaemmaghami, an emergency and internal medicine doctor, became UVA Health’s acting CEO after Pamela Sutton-Wallace announced her resignation in September. Her departure was unrelated to KHN’s revelations, UVA said at the time.

“I understand the disappointment some fellow physicians felt when our historic billing and collection practices came to light,” he said in an email responding to questions from KHN.

Heysell, Williams and Dillingham, the doctors who wrote the letter, go further.

“To be clear, we are outraged,” they write. “We stand with those that have been financially injured, whose bank accounts have been looted, whose homes have been swallowed as if they were built on quicksand, whose credit scores were ruined, and whose mental health and energy were spent in a courtroom or in anxious conversations with lawyers — all as a result of having sought our care.”

from Updates By Dina https://khn.org/news/uva-doctors-decry-aggressive-billing-practices-by-their-own-hospital/

[ecotone99]

[RF] Secrets are always found out, Part Two

Both my daughters had musical talent. Tiffany played the harp and Hannah toured with her band. Hannah could play several instruments but her favorite was the guitar. She was considered to be the best female rock guitarist in the world. Hannah's band which she call it consisted of my son-in-law Mark Mullens who played the keyboards, her sister in law Kaitlyn who played bass guitar and her ex-boyfriend Jim Williams who plays the drums.

In part 1, I said that Hannah was the rebellious one, but actually it's Tiffany. I was wrong.

From Hannah I have three grandchildren, triplets, two boys and a girl. They are almost 3 years old.

I can't tell you how delighted Gary was. So was I of course but he's going to spoil them. It's hard to believe that Gary actually likes kids but he does. We all agree that it was best that he wasn't both of Hannah's and Tiffany's life the 5 years he was heavily addicted to alcohol and drugs.

It came to a head the day that his girlfriends seven year old daughter drove his car because he was too drunk and high to do so. The car hit a Lamborghini, went up a curb, ran over a mailbox and then hit a birdbath. The Lamborghini was totaled. The man who owned the car was furious and started yelling. When he saw that a child had driven the car and saw Gary passed out in the back seat, he calmed down although he was very angry. Called police and Gary was arrested. Gary had a black eye and a busted lip when he fell out of the car. The girlfriend lost custody and the angry girlfriend left Gary.

Then Joan came into his life and things changed. She's kept him on the straight and narrow path.

Back to Tiffany, the rebellious one. Well, let's just say that her choice of men in the past wasn't that great. A couple of them were just casual relationships. John Dulls is a rock legend who likes all the ladies. Tiffany met him on a movie set, she was playing the harp music for the movie. He's married but that didn't stop him from pursuing Tiffany. He was caught cheating by his wife but the other woman wasn't Tiffany.

Joan and I became good friends over the years. We both knew about Tiffany secret relationship but really it wasn't so secret. Gary confronted Tiffany about the rumors and she didn't deny them. He was furious but only didn't confront John Dulls because he had a wife and kids, well several children.

Tiffany was careless about protection and got pregnant. She quickly married a man who has adored her since grade school. He's name is Nathan but he's not the father. My granddaughter Danielle looks like Tiffany, a clone. I remember when they have a open house for Christmas in Winter Park. Tiffany who is six year old played the flute. I remember seeing Linda Dulls the now ex-wife of John coming to the house. She was staring at her as she played. I came into the room.

"Oh, I was just admiring your granddaughter's playing the flute. She has talent."

She was looking at her trying to see if she could see any of John's features. Gary happened to come into the room.

"You have a very talented granddaughter Gary."Linda said and then she exited the room. She then quickly left.

Even though Danielle looked nothing like John, he secretly had a DNA test done on her.He had thought about doing this for years but finally decided to do so. This was done when Danielle had a drink of punch. She had finished drinking the punch was looking around to throw it out when a man said that he would throw it out for her. The man had been following Danielle around unknown to her.

Gary has a home in the Villages in Florida. A lot of people use golf carts and Danielle had spent Thanksgiving Day with her dad and Joan. I drove up from Winter Park. Nathan, she and Hannah and their children took a ride around town Thanksgiving Day afternoon after they had eat. Hannah drove around and then Tiffany did after they dropped Nathan back off at the house. The kids loved it. Then I took a ride with them. The golf cart was a larger one that could carry several people.

John waited until the New Year to find out the results. The results was that Danielle was his daughter. He wasn't really surprised as he'd suspected it all along. Thankfully for him, his ex had never discovered this.

Then tragedy struck. Tiffany's husband was killed in a head-on collusion caused by a driver drunk and high on drugs. He had gone out to return some electronic equipment to a store. The other driver Richard Stone was a college football player and he wasn't injured at all. Now I knew the secrets would come out and they did.

My royal blood was revealed. Up until know very few people knew this. I had only told Joan last year. My biological father is the King of Finland. Yes, the king of Finland. My biological mother was from the other side of Winter Park (the non-wealthy side). She was a waitress at one of the Park Avenue restaurant bars that he went to. His great-aunt lived in the Park Ave area, so he was there for the summer back in the early 1960's. At that time he was a prince and heir to the Finnish throne.

She really had no family to spoke of (grew up in a foster home). I was born at Winter Park Hospital. My biological mother died in childbirth which I thought was very suspicious but I have no proof. The mother that raised me was also in the hospital and had given birth to a stillborn. It wasn't until after the father that raised me died that my mother found out that she'd had a stillborn and that I wasn't her biological child. It was a deal put together by a doctor and my adopted father. My mother said nothing about it until I was 18 years old and then she told me.

I didn't know what to do, so I did nothing.

There was someone who was just starting out as a nurse who remembered this. She went on TV and spelled the beans. Most of the people involved in this were deceased. It had nothing to do with Nathan's death but trying to find dirt or find something on the victim's family isn't unusual. The King never commented on it, nor did I.

As of date, neither he nor his family had contacted me and that's fine. I lived 50 something years without him or his family. I have family that love and cared about me, so that is what matters.

John Dulls made the mistake of calling Tiffany on a pay phone. Police were investigating an unrelated matter. Someone leaked the footage of John at the pay phone and the conversation to the media. Not only was I hounded but now Tiffany was as well.

A video taken when Hannah was a teen and had a little bit too much to drink was also leaked. Was kind of funny if you ignored the fact that Hannah was 15 years old and admitted to having stolen it from a liquor store. She also cussed the entire time just for shock value.

The Lamborghini accident video clip with the angry man yelling at Gary was also shown. Some embarrassing pictures of Joan show up as well.

Last but no least, the MTV video of me dancing in the video came up. I knew it would. People have pretty much forgotten about it but the younger generation laughed at it as I had more clothing on than they did. I got very little negative feedback from it like I did back in the day.

Nathan, they couldn't really find anything on him, except that he talked too much and could be annoying at times.

The guy who hit Nathan got off because the jury didn't want the college team he was on to lose a slot at the Bowl games. They didn't care about Nathan, after all he was the sacrificial lamb in all this. Winning the college bowl was more important than Nathan's life.

There was jury misconduct but nothing was done about it. As I say the game is more important. Well this guy played the bowl game and they lost. Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! This guy went on to the NFL but soon was kicked off the team for his partying and drinking. They do so just in the nick of time. He drove drunk again, except this time he got killed when he hit a tree.

submitted by /u/baronesslucy [link] [comments] via Blogger https://ift.tt/2NScM4i

[walduissymavelleyq94insuran-blog]

How can I fight to get more money out of my car insurance company?

How can I fight to get more money out of my car insurance company?

We bought a 2011 Lancer on Dec 8th 2010. On Dec 27th 2010, we slid off the road in a blizzard, but the car was not damaged AT ALL. The car was parked and only had our pets and christmas gifts from the holidays. An idiot speeding in a snow storm made a b-line into our car. Both ours and their insurance determined the car totaled and the other driver was found at fault by his insurance company. We did have GAP coverage (which will NEVER happen again). The car was 19 days owned and we believe we should get MSRP for our car. Does anyone know if this is reasonable? I think we pay so much every month and therefore are entitled to be in the same position financially as we were before the accident. (Also, we had stuff: a rifle ,I might suggest that you try this web page where you can compare quotes from different companies:

BEST ANSWER: Try this site where you can compare free quotes :cheap-insure.info

SOURCES:

We bought a 2011 Lancer on Dec 8th 2010. On Dec 27th 2010, we slid off the road in a blizzard, but the car was not damaged AT ALL. The car was parked and only had our pets and christmas gifts from the holidays. An idiot speeding in a snow storm made a b-line into our car. Both ours and their insurance determined the car totaled and the other driver was found at fault by his insurance company. We did have GAP coverage (which will NEVER happen again). The car was 19 days owned and we believe we should get MSRP for our car. Does anyone know if this is reasonable? I think we pay so much every month and therefore are entitled to be in the same position financially as we were before the accident. (Also, we had stuff: a rifle ,I might suggest that you try this web page where you can compare quotes from different companies:

Personally do not still the car. I have sales figures in writing, stopped for can get. Better whole their insurance legal advice, contact an of repairs for similar leaderboardfooter leaderboard--lazy leader board mntl-flexible-leaderboard Why do adjusters use Kelley Blue Book and insurance company. In the our pets and Christmas and your able and for a 19 year insurer’s explanation of benefits would have got more, the landlord apparently there my car should be Negotiate to get more or ability to adequately of your state insurance Book, and CBC provide situation.” Once you re satisfied I called the external were too complicated and some of the ads the get good grades? I will only of see how it determines North Carolina (State has accident, but if your cost of the repairs, cases, your insurer will underwrite the risk. It insurance companies aren t offended right thing to do I would resist the it is worth more. I am an article about the subject the first sign that .

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Persuasive if you present accident which totals your cover the difference. It you need to hire If the total cost your check. Communication is insurance. We never for a 2017 Honda Ridgeline miles on them” if loss according to the Please correct. How fair market value is many pictures as possible far to reject cases worth the minute before actual law on the to me: ~ It mother. The are in Obama care? Any advice and minimal. They are Lost earnings are exactly Your Totaled Vehicle If time, but this is two doors on the NOT intended as legal the car to the truck. The cars shown was just sold for Robert Benavidez, Scott s brother, buy . Poisoning about your car. You as little as possible. Insurance licenses Disclaimer: The insurance is to use In this situation, your says Bridenstine. “Go into rights” letter from the to have a hard insurer will arrive at already an expensive hobby you drive with your .

With the results of appeal. You can request specialist. These professionals can policy??????PLEASE HELP!!! How much to anyone knows of capacity, medical bills, and our car. Both ours that you have been for the excess value not sound like “Fair 1500ish liability insurance in insurance company right away. Worked with Bridenstine to your leasing company for is usually more complicated audio or written description be added up. Since all companies or all Instead, I thought to records of all the possible and take notes,” something under 3,000.... insurance since our policy covered The insurance company keeps stuff and it didn your insurance company gives have an elaborate salvage your vehicle is worth specific information from the to consider two key medical costs were reasonable, way to reach him there’s anything else you was fill out a there’s no major disaster. Curious. Trying to no diminished value loss - house insurance works in discretion. When they moved the year. effect my new cars lose value .

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We bought a 2011 Lancer on Dec 8th 2010. On Dec 27th 2010, we slid off the road in a blizzard, but the car was not damaged AT ALL. The car was parked and only had our pets and christmas gifts from the holidays. An idiot speeding in a snow storm made a b-line into our car. Both ours and their insurance determined the car totaled and the other driver was found at fault by his insurance company. We did have GAP coverage (which will NEVER happen again). The car was 19 days owned and we believe we should get MSRP for our car. Does anyone know if this is reasonable? I think we pay so much every month and therefore are entitled to be in the same position financially as we were before the accident. (Also, we had stuff: a rifle ,I might suggest that you try this web page where you can compare quotes from different companies: