#and of course forms of gender surveillance and policing are modulated by attraction/disgust and other affects + multiple forms of power
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someone should study how gender performance gets surveilled and disciplined in gay dating btw
#what if it were me..........#genuinely i find it so interesting that as gay and trans people we're often aware of sex and romance#as areas where heterosexuality and gender roles are policed and maintained#but there can be this willful ignorance that these reinforcements are happening in different directions in our own contexts#when i was going on a lot of first dates i felt like people often had a sort of rorschach test level of variability in how they interpreted#my gender performance and presentation#usually in relation to however they conceived of their own gender and attractions#so as a really simplified example i could be presenting and acting exactly the same way with two different people#and one would call me butch and one would call me femme#and i don't think i'm either but it was really fascinating trying to figure out from context clues where people's heads were at#and when i got into relationships with people they often tried to steer me towards gender performance that reinforced their read#or they would just stubbornly interpret in that same vein regardless of what i was actually saying or doing#and it was rarely in a 'are you the boy or the girl' way which is i think the only way i see it get talked about#like i've definitely gone out with people who wanted to read my gender as being similar to theirs to reinforce their own sense of self#and of course forms of gender surveillance and policing are modulated by attraction/disgust and other affects + multiple forms of power#like this is all hugely simplified but even so it really fascinates me and i haven't seen much writing about it#personal nonsense
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