#and then Yata proposes and he's just staring while Yata smiles gently at him and slides the ring onto his finger

[ridiasfangirlings]

Yata and Fushimi have been dating for a while, they're living together, they've talked about taking the next step but no plans have been made. Yata's been picking up more hours at work or working odd jobs where he can to save up money because he wants to buy Fushimi a really nice ring. Fushimi takes it the wrong way (Yata doesn't want to be around him) and argues with Yata the night Yata plans to propose. What happens from there?

Fushimi and fucking up his own life, name a more iconic duo. Imagine the two of them have been living together for a few months and dating for longer than that. Yata’s been thinking about proposing for a while now, which is actually why he suggested they move in together as like a way of ‘testing’ if he was ready to move to the next step. He’s definitely decided that he is too, he wants to propose to Fushimi as soon as possible. Except when he mentions it to the Homra guys and they all congratulate him they ask him what kind of ring he’s buying and Yata’s like ‘…shit.’

Intellectually Yata knows that Fushimi probably wouldn’t care much about jewelry but at the same time Yata wants to get him something, like not because you’re ‘supposed’ to buy engagement rings but because he wants something tangible that he can gift to Fushimi to show how much he wants Fushimi to marry him (and okay, maybe a little possessive, letting that creepy Blue King know that Saruhiko is taken thanks). Yata doesn’t have a lot of money though and maybe for the first time Yata is really aware that he’s never been rich while Fushimi is at least comfortable financially, that Fushimi grew up with rich parents and now has a cushy government job and how lame would it be if Yata gave him some cheap dinky ring. This is how Yata talks himself into getting Fushimi an expensive ring and to pay for it he starts taking extra hours at work, doing some extra errands for Kusanagi around the bar, maybe even adding on like a side hustle all so he can earn enough cash for a good ring.

Meanwhile Fushimi has obviously noticed that Yata isn’t around as much as normal. They probably have trouble finding free time to spend together as it is due to Fushimi’s work so now it’s even worse, some days Fushimi barely even sees Yata. When he asks about it Yata gets noticeably nervous and says he’s just doing some favors for people or that stuff came up at work, Yata probably thinks he’s being suave but he’s actually looking totally dodgy and suspicious. Fushimi being Fushimi he immediately starts suspecting the worst: they’ve only been living together a few months after all and Yata still complains about Fushimi’s diet and bad habits, complaining that he doesn’t do the laundry or that he could help with the cleaning and Fushimi’s suddenly like hyper aware of all his deficiencies, like maybe now that they’re living together Yata’s remembered what a mess Fushimi is and is trying to find a way to get out of this whole relationship.

With Yata being so busy and Fushimi’s own work schedule Yata doesn’t even notice that Fushimi’s been getting quieter and quieter, so focused on his goal that he completely forgets who he’s dating. Fushimi is just quietly going from self loathing spiral to self destructive and he’s started staying later at work to avoid Yata too, convincing himself that this was a stupid idea to begin with and why did he ever think Yata would love him. Finally Yata gets enough money to buy the ring and decides to go home early to surprise Fushimi, all ready to make a nice dinner and propose. Yata’s really nervous but excited, right until he steps into the apartment and sees Fushimi packing his bags.

Yata’s just shocked and also probably pretty hurt, thinking Fushimi was about to do like before and just disappear without telling Yata anything. Fushimi coldly says isn’t this what Yata wants, for Fushimi to leave him alone, and Yata starts to get angry because Fushimi’s just going to break things off without explaining again. Fushimi scoffs that Yata’s the one who was lying and playing pretend, going into full asshole mode to hide his own hurt and Yata starts to give in to his own anger and yell back…and then he puts a hand into his pocket and touches the ring and he stops, and takes a deep breath. 

Yata’s been through this before, after all, and didn’t he promise he wasn’t going to let miscommunication get between them again. So Yata takes a moment to calm himself and he sits down on the bed and asks Fushimi why he thinks Yata doesn’t want to be with him anymore. Fushimi’s caught off guard by this Misaki who won’t rise to the bait and he looks away, Yata reaches over and touches Fushimi’s cheek, making Fushimi look at him. Yata says they’re not gonna do this again right and finally Fushimi sighs and says Yata’s the one who’s been avoiding him.

 All of a sudden Yata realizes what this is about and he sighs and then says he’s sorry. Fushimi is just baffled by that one and Yata gives him a thin smile and says he forgot about how things affect Fushimi and he should know better than to keep stuff from Fushimi, even if it’s for a good reason, because Fushimi thinks too much and assumes the worst. Fushimi tries to act like he wasn’t assuming anything but Yata knows that’s exactly what Fushimi did and he says he’ll try to be better about that, if Fushimi can work on just telling Yata when something upsets him instead of immediately planning his escape. Fushimi shifts, obviously uncomfortable, and Yata says he’s serious, he thought maybe he’d done enough to help Fushimi realize that but there’s still stuff they need to work on, Fushimi can’t just plan to run at the first sign of trouble. Fushimi’s still tense but finally he sighs and mumbles out a ‘fine, I’ll try’ and imagine now he’s being clingy to hide the fact that he knows he did something wrong and doesn’t want to admit it. Yata laughs a little and says good, now do you want to see what I was doing all that time. Yata admits he’d planned something a little more romantic but this’ll have to do as he pulls out the ring, asking if Fushimi will marry him. 

[dubredofanfics]

Six Years

Part 26 - Recurring Feelings

"Did she throw you out of her condo?" Yasay asked. "Hindi, ako man yung umalis." Rodrigo replied.

"Na-ano lang ako," his face twitched in disappointment. "Siguro wala na talagang ano si Leni saakin kaya ganon kung makasabi siya na pinagsamantalahan ko siya, parang diring diri siya." He confided to one of his closest friends. "Baka naman nagulat lang. Adrenaline rush." Yasay tried to enlighten him but he felt so cynical.

"Okay ka lang?" Sally asked her daughter. "Naooffend yata si Rody." She expressed her anxiety. "Kung totoo yung sinasabi niya, parang ang unfair naman na concerned lang naman siya saakin tapos pinagbintangan pa natin siya ng kung ano ano." She added. "Hayaan mo na muna yan, Leni. Iwasan mo muna, palamigin mo bago mo subukang kausapin." Sally advised favoring her daughter. Leni felt so guilty for accusing Rodrigo of things, she wanted to apologize to him right away but at the same time, she didn't have the guts to face him.

Leni gave herself about two weeks to think, she gave him space. Rody has to admit that he's been emotionally battered by his love for Leni, he couldn't explain why he keeps fighting for her amidst every heartbreak she gave him, maybe he loves her that much.

—

Sana dumating yung araw na magkakabati rin kami.

She mentally spoke and rested her chin on her hand as she was alone in her office. She thought about the times she has hurt Rodrigo and she couldn't feel any more sorry for causing all the pain. Hurting him was the least thing she wants to make him feel but it seemed ineluctable.

Pero 'di ba sa love, may ups and downs talaga? Baka ito yung down time namin?

She tried to stay hopeful.

Pero ang tagal na naming ganito. What if pilit ako ng pilit tapos hindi naman pala kami para sa isa't isa?

She felt cynical again.

She gazed into the glassed Ecuadorian rose and decided to open the container to touch it's petals.

As soon as her skin touched the petal, she haltered and looked closely — only realizing it wasn't real anymore. It was a synthetic flower and not the Ecuadorian rose she used to have, it shook her.

She rushed outside her office and called her staffs and cleaning employees. "Sino sainyo yung nangielam nitong flower?" She asked with a hint of panic and anger in her voice. The staffs looked at each other.

"Hindi na 'to yung bulaklak na nasa loob. Hawakan niyo! Synthetic na 'to oh. Sino sainyo yung nagpalit?!" She demanded for an answer.

She grunted, torn between crying and yelling. "Sabihin niyo na, pwede? Hindi ako magagalit, kailangan ko lang malaman kung nasaan." She pleaded but no one knew what happened to it.

"Mam, hindi naman po kami nangingielam ng gamit niyo sa opisina." "Hindi po namin alam mam." "Hindi niyo po ba naiuwi?"

"Nasaan? Hindi lang basta bulaklak 'to, ano ba?" She triggered them but she can't squeeze out something that isn't there. She panted and headed back to her office clueless of what to do next now that she lost the most special tangible gift that Rody gave her.

With the said incident, Leni felt even more undeserving to be forgiven by him. She refused to tell him about as she didn't want to piss him off. It divided them even more up to the point that another group of months being all awkward and distant passed by.

—

Ferly looked at Leni's eyes as she spoke about how she is going to discuss their revised housing proposal to Rodrigo. "Okay na ba kayo ni Digong?" She asked, Leni chuckled faintly, she didn't expect her question would be something personal.

"Oo naman, bakit mo natanong?" She replied and sat back down to her seat. "Wala naman. Syempre alam naman ng buong Pilipinas yata yung past niyo tapos eto ka nanaman, may project na nilelead na largely involved ang president." She remarked. Leni knew to herself that it may be a tough game for her to work closely with him again. They continued working even after they messed up months ago but not this close, not this involved.

"Tsaka, ilang araw ka nang tutok na tutok diyan ha?! Natutulog ka pa ba?" She asked with a sound of disbelief. "One hour, two hours." Leni replied. "Grabe! Stress yan ha. Magpahinga ka rin, baka magkasakit na niyan. Nung Monday ka pa nakatutok diyan, magthu-Thursday na." She pointed out out of concern.

"Kailangan matapos na eh. Iaabot ko pa 'to kay Digong mamayang hapon para by tomorrow up for review nalang ng housing department." She informed her about her plans.

"Nagpapakitang gilas ka ba kay ex?" Ferly teased in jest. "Hindi noh, trabaho lang." Leni chuckled, being teased to him still makes her blush. "Tsaka kahit magpakitang gilas ako doon, hindi narin ako mapapansin non." She added. "Sus, Leni. Ilang buwan na halatang hindi ka parin nakakamove on." Ferly stood up.

"Sobra naman, nakamove on na ako. Tanggap ko na na hanggang doon nalang kami noh." She concealed her emotions with a chuckle. Ferly pursed her lips, she thought it's better to cut off the topic as it might just add up to her busy head. "It doesn't matter. Ang mahalaga naging masaya kayo sa isa't isa noon at okay kayo ngayon." She stated, Leni smiled softly. "Oo naman."

Silence penetrated the room for a moment, Ferly saw the slight misery in her eyes. "Anyway, sige tapusin mo na yan, baka nakakaistorbo pa ako. Magpahinga ka after mo ha?" She bid before she left.

Leni exhaled heavily and covered her eyes with her hands. She started to feel the dizziness and drowsiness due to lack of sleep but she can't stop. She continued working until she finished her task of revising.

She immediately headed to the palace after work to hand over the revised proposal and personally discuss it to Rodrigo but he wasn't there when she arrived. A staff informed her that he'll be back in less than an hour so she decided to stay on queue and wait for him to return.

Bong dialed up Ferly, Digong talked to her to ask for an update about the housing proposal they are working on.

"Na kay Leni po, president. Hindi po ba siya dumaan diyan sa Malacañang?" Ferly asked out of confusion. "Natapos na ba yung revise?" He asked. "Opo, ilang araw na nga puyat si Leni kakarevise diyan sa proposal. Hindi na nga ho natutulog." She shared laughing. Digong was surprised to know that they were able to finish the revision in four days, he called them up just for an update, he predicted they would finish it in a week but they finished it earlier. "Natapos ni Leni? Grabe man yung walang tulog, baka naman magkasakit siya. Next week pa naman due." He replied.

"Sabi niya idadaan daw niya ngayong hapon yung revision sa Malacañang, hindi po ba siya dumaan?" Ferly reiterated. "Hindi ko man alam. On the way palang kami sa palasyo ulit, binisita namin yung lote ng pagtatayuan nung housing project." He stated.

Leni reread the documents so she could explain well to Digong the aspects of it and the changes they made when he arrives. In a couple of minutes, he finally arrived. She stood up in respect and smiled at him with a little bow.

"Sorry mam, naghintay ka pa." He apologized and took the documents she was handing to him. "Okay lang, sir." She replied and looked at him browsing the pages of the folder.

Suddenly, she started to feel dizzy again. She cleared her eyes and smiled at him but her vision started to blur out and her balance became unstable.

"Mam, sa opisina nalang natin pag-usapan para di tayo nakatayo." He suggested but she seemed distracted. "Mam?" He asked after noticing how she wasn't paying attention to him.

"Sir?" She replied trying to shake off her instability. "Okay ka lang, mam?" He asked.

She pulled of a smile and nodded but her vision remained cloudy. "Sigurado—"

Leni suddenly lost consciousness. Out of reflexes, Digong caught her in his arms to protect her from falling down. The other staffs and guards assisted them.

Rodrigo's chest pounded strongly in deep worry. "Bong, tumawag ka ng doctor!" He demanded and asked the security to help him carry her up to one of the bedroom of the palace so she could comfortably lie down while waiting for the medical assistance.

He couldn't keep calm as he saw her all unconscious. He nagged Bong about the medical assistance he called for. "Papunta na daw, Digong. Mga fifteen minutes daw." He replied. "Sabihin mo bilisan!" He demanded.

He checked on Leni's pulse and breathing, he was grateful her stats were normal. She placed a few pillows under her feet to raise up her legs a bit.

After a couple of minutes, the doctor finally arrived and checked on Leni's vital signs. After gathering the data, the doctor concluded that all her signs are normal and there is nothing much to worry.

Digong demanded for the check uo summary. "Wala namang harmful diagnosis, president. I think it's due to over fatigue and stress kaya siya nahimatay." The doctor explained, Digong knew it may be accurate as he recalled Ferly talking about how focused Leni was in finishing the project proposal revision.

"She just needs to rest tapos ichecheck up natin ulit si ma'am." He added. "Sige, doc. Salamat. Salamat." He replied, the guards escorted the doctor as he left.

Rodrigo was left alone in the room, Bong stayed outside. He sighed heavily as he looked at Leni. She appears to be in deep sleep, it makes his heart melt.

It's been ages since he had a very close and long encounter with her and seeing her peacefully sleeping next to his eyes felt like an eden to him.

He traipsed towards her and sat at the edge of the bed. He hated how she's not taking care of herself well, it irked him more that he can no longer be there around her all the time to take care of her when she can't. He gently held her hand and frantically stroked it with his thumb while looking at her face.

He exhaled sharply, "Alagaan mo naman sarili mo mam." He uttered softly while holding her hand. He filled the gaps of her fingers as the touch of her skin made him miss holding her hands. A small smile grew on his lips, "Gagi ka talaga kahit kelan. Di mo inaalagaan sarili mo."

For quite a moment, he just stared at her and it became inevitable for him not to feel all the feelings he have for her — it was never gone, it never dwindled.

Mahal na mahal parin kita.

He admitted to himself while gazing at the face of the woman he never thought he would love that much. "Hindi na ako laging nasa tabi mo, hindi na kita mababantayan lagi kaya wag mong pabayaan yung sarili mo mam." He uttered in security that she won't even hear his sincere messages while she's in deep sleep.

He leaned towards her and kissed her temple before he decided to head out of the room and let her rest alone.

As the door closed, Leni slowly opened her eyes. She heard everything he said, tears ran down from her eyes in happiness. She thought he was completely over her; all this time, she thought that he no longer cares about her but with what she just heard, she just proved that he still sees her the same, nothing has changed and he is still the Rodrigo that made her fall in love.

That's when she knew that she's not over him yet. She keeps saying she's fine and she already accepted the fact that they are never working things out again but in a snap, she felt like she has to start fighting for him again.

To be continued...