#and then c) wait 7-14 business days for them to receive it and decide whether to give me my own records or not & PRESUMABLY email them to me

[kanyniablue]

hello yes i am insane & also potentially dangerous at this time

[helovesyousomuch]

Highlights from the book of Ecclesiastes

12 July 2018

The night when sleep would not visit me from underlying anxiety and dissatisfaction about my work/career/finances. It has been long 7.5 years of deep desire to help out my family in their despair. How I wish I can provide. How I wish I have a job that will utilise my skills or even just find a doorway.

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The greater my wisdom, the greater my grief.    To increase knowledge only increases sorrow. So I decided there is nothing better than to enjoy food and drink and to find satisfaction in work. Then I realized that these pleasures are from the hand of God. 25 For who can eat or enjoy anything apart from him?[b] 26 God gives wisdom, knowledge, and joy to those who please him. Yet God has made everything beautiful for its own time. He has planted eternity in the human heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope of God’s work from beginning to end. So I concluded there is nothing better than to be happy and enjoy ourselves as long as we can. 13 And people should eat and drink and enjoy the fruits of their labor, for these are gifts from God. So I saw that there is nothing better for people than to be happy in their work. That is our lot in life. And no one can bring us back to see what happens after we die. Then I observed that most people are motivated to success because they envy their neighbors. But this, too, is meaningless—like chasing the wind. 5 “Fools fold their idle hands,    leading them to ruin.” 6 And yet, “Better to have one handful with quietness    than two handfuls with hard work    and chasing the wind.” Too much activity gives you restless dreams; too many words make you a fool. Don’t let your mouth make you sin. And don’t defend yourself by telling the Temple messenger that the promise you made was a mistake. That would make God angry, and he might wipe out everything you have achieved. 7 Talk is cheap, like daydreams and other useless activities. Fear God instead. Those who love money will never have enough. How meaningless to think that wealth brings true happiness! 11 The more you have, the more people come to help you spend it. So what good is wealth—except perhaps to watch it slip through your fingers! 12 People who work hard sleep well, whether they eat little or much. But the rich seldom get a good night’s sleep. People leave this world no better off than when they came. All their hard work is for nothing—like working for the wind. 17 Throughout their lives, they live under a cloud—frustrated, discouraged, and angry. Even so, I have noticed one thing, at least, that is good. It is good for people to eat, drink, and enjoy their work under the sun during the short life God has given them, and to accept their lot in life. 19 And it is a good thing to receive wealth from God and the good health to enjoy it. To enjoy your work and accept your lot in life—this is indeed a gift from God. 20 God keeps such people so busy enjoying life that they take no time to brood over the past. God gives some people great wealth and honor and everything they could ever want, but then he doesn’t give them the chance to enjoy these things. They die, and someone else, even a stranger, ends up enjoying their wealth! This is meaningless—a sickening tragedy. All people spend their lives scratching for food, but they never seem to have enough. Enjoy what you have rather than desiring what you don’t have. Just dreaming about nice things is meaningless—like chasing the wind. Everything has already been decided. It was known long ago what each person would be. So there’s no use arguing with God about your destiny. The more words you speak, the less they mean. So what good are they? 12 In the few days of our meaningless lives, who knows how our days can best be spent? Our lives are like a shadow. Who can tell what will happen on this earth after we are gone? sadness has a refining influence on us. A wise person thinks a lot about death,    while a fool thinks only about having a good time. Finishing is better than starting.    Patience is better than pride. Don’t long for “the good old days.”    This is not wise. Wisdom and money can get you almost anything,    but only wisdom can save your life. Accept the way God does things,    for who can straighten what he has made crooked? 14 Enjoy prosperity while you can,    but when hard times strike, realize that both come from God.    Remember that nothing is certain in this life. So don’t be too good or too wise! Why destroy yourself? 17 On the other hand, don’t be too wicked either. Don’t be a fool! Why die before your time? Not a single person on earth is always good and never sins. God created people to be virtuous, but they have each turned to follow their own downward path.” How wonderful to be wise,    to analyze and interpret things. Wisdom lights up a person’s face,    softening its harshness. Those who are wise will find a time and a way to do what is right, 6 for there is a time and a way for everything, even when a person is in trouble. So I recommend having fun, because there is nothing better for people in this world than to eat, drink, and enjoy life. That way they will experience some happiness along with all the hard work God gives them under the sun. I realized that no one can discover everything God is doing under the sun. Not even the wisest people discover everything, no matter what they claim. This, too, I carefully explored: Even though the actions of godly and wise people are in God’s hands, no one knows whether God will show them favor. It seems so wrong that everyone under the sun suffers the same fate. Already twisted by evil, people choose their own mad course, for they have no hope. So go ahead. Eat your food with joy, and drink your wine with a happy heart, for God approves of this! 8 Wear fine clothes, with a splash of cologne! 9 Live happily with the woman you love through all the meaningless days of life that God has given you under the sun. The wife God gives you is your reward for all your earthly toil. 10 Whatever you do, do well. For when you go to the grave,[b] there will be no work or planning or knowledge or wisdom. The fastest runner doesn’t always win the race, and the strongest warrior doesn’t always win the battle. The wise sometimes go hungry, and the skillful are not necessarily wealthy. And those who are educated don’t always lead successful lives. It is all decided by chance, by being in the right place at the right time. 12 People can never predict when hard times might come. Like fish in a net or birds in a trap, people are caught by sudden tragedy. If your boss is angry at you, don’t quit!    A quiet spirit can overcome even great mistakes. Using a dull ax requires great strength,    so sharpen the blade. That’s the value of wisdom;    it helps you succeed. Fools are so exhausted by a little work    that they can’t even find their way home. Send your grain across the seas,    and in time, profits will flow back to you.[a] 2 But divide your investments among many places,[b]    for you do not know what risks might lie ahead. Farmers who wait for perfect weather never plant.    If they watch every cloud, they never harvest. Just as you cannot understand the path of the wind or the mystery of a tiny baby growing in its mother’s womb,[c] so you cannot understand the activity of God, who does all things. 6 Plant your seed in the morning and keep busy all afternoon, for you don’t know if profit will come from one activity or another—or maybe both. Young people,[d] it’s wonderful to be young! Enjoy every minute of it. Do everything you want to do; take it all in. But remember that you must give an account to God for everything you do. 10 So refuse to worry, and keep your body healthy. But remember that youth, with a whole life before you, is meaningless. Don’t let the excitement of youth cause you to forget your Creator. Honor him in your youth before you grow old and say, “Life is not pleasant anymore.” Yes, remember your Creator now while you are young, before the silver cord of life snaps and the golden bowl is broken. For then the dust will return to the earth, and the spirit will return to God who gave it. But, my child,[c] let me give you some further advice: Be careful, for writing books is endless, and much study wears you out. Fear God and obey his commands, for this is everyone’s duty. 14 God will judge us for everything we do, including every secret thing, whether good or bad.