#and they go on a quest to help steve get supplies and also a girlfriend

[miss-spookhead]

thinking about a Blast From the Past steddie au tonight. like, think about it for a second--steve as the sweet, well-meaning himbo raised in a fallout shelter and eddie as the cynic who shows him the world as it is:

The year was 1962, and an atomic bomb had just dropped on top of the Harrington household.

Okay, not really. It was actually a fighter jet that suffered a mechanical failure just above the little plot of land the Harringtons called their home, but Walter Harrington took it differently. Far differently.

See, the thing was that the man was living in a state of paranoid delusion over the Cold War--terrified of the possibility of an outright nuclear holocaust over the Cuban Missile Crisis and the Soviet Union. He had been carefully building a fallout shelter under his home for his wife and possible children to live in with the works--canned food, running water, and even a working television.

And one day they went in and simply never left. The explosion right when they closed the door was tangible proof that the nuclear war was happening right above them.

A few years later, around 1968, a baby boy was born in a fallout shelter with no one but his mom and dad to keep him company.

They raised Steve the best they could, even if Walter Harrington was a mad genius and Madeline Harrington was a borderline alcoholic. Even if the boy was living in a perfect little time capsule of the fifties and early sixties. Walter made sure to educate him right and teach him how to be a sociable gentleman--even if he had no idea what swear words or the concept of sex were. That was for another time. Although, twenty-four years came and went for Steve Harrington, his father still owes him 'another time'.

Steve Harrington grows twenty-four years in perfect seclusion, but that changes at the flick of a switch.

The year is 1992: supplies are dwindling Walter is growing sick, and Steve is tasked to bravely set foot in the nuclear fallout to retrieve more material. (The only reason why Walter assumes they can even get more stuff is because he observed the outside world when the shelter unlocked and mistook it as a post-apocalyptic mutant society.)

The moment Steve made it outside his little bubble, he was utterly fascinated by the world--how different the people were outside of his television and his little books, how bright the sky was outside, how the irritable man on the bus wouldn't accept the money he tried to give him, how the bus moved and didn't fling him right off his seat.

(He even saw an adult bookstore. Dad told him that those things were filled with poisonous gas. How were they even to operate if they were filled with poisonous gas? That's dangerous and totally inconsiderate of the general public's safety.)

Anyway, he tries to follow the grocery list that Mom and Dad gave him the best he can, stocking up on poultry and tissue paper and the works. But by the end of the day, he doesn't know where he came from. Not a single sign or building or person can give him a single clue where to go.

After a few hours of wandering, suitcase in hand, he comes across a store with WE BUY BASEBALL CARDS written on the window.

Golly, Steve loves baseball cards--could look at Dad's collection for hours, and with the collection he has, he could make a pretty penny selling them for supplies. Despite the little hobby store being beside an adult bookstore with poisonous gas, he scampers right in.

"I see you're looking to buy baseball cards," he says breezily to the gruff, scary-looking man behind the counter.

"That I am," he replies.

Steve pulls a few from his jacket's inner pocket. "Well, these are a bit old, you see, but I was hoping you still might be interested."

The gruff man yanks them from his hands, a spark in his eye. He looks delighted to see them, and it fills Steve with an excitement he hadn't felt at all today. Nobody has been this happy over something he's done today. "Woah," he gasps, then covers it with a cough. "Mickey Mantle rookie season...how much do you want?"

"I was hoping to sell all of my cards, actually!"

The man sputters incredulously. "All of 'em? Are you fucking with me?"

"I'm not sure what that means, but all I have are hundred-dollar bills and I need something smaller. Like, uh...ones, tens, fives..."

"Tell you what, I'll give you five hundred in small bills for all you got."

Steve smiles brightly. "Oh, that would be wonderful, sir--"

"Five hundred for a case-full of rookie season Mickey Mantles, Rick, are you fucking joking?" A deep voice cuts through Steve's thanks from the other side of the small store. He turns around to find a man leaning against a magazine rack, arms folded sternly.

The man is unlike Steve's ever seen before. Long, long limbs and big brown eyes that look traced with black and smudged around the edges. Pretty lips, too almost girl-ish, in the way they were big and plush like the women he'd see on the television. The strangest thing about him, though, was the curly hair that tumbled past his shoulders.

He looked mad, though. Madder than mad.

"Tell the poor guy you're fucking with him," long-hair-pretty-lips says to the man behind the counter, who bristles.

"Were you raised in a fucking barn, Munson? Who told you to interrupt on business?" Rick counters. Steve was really not appreciating the amount of f-words dropped in the conversation, it was uncouth.

"Sure I was!" Munson saunters towards the counter and Steve's eyes follow him like a moth to a light. "But my morals go past your business practices at this point. You remember the ninth commandment, yeah?"

"You shut your Goddamn mouth--"

"Excuse me sir, but I really don't appreciate how you're using the Lord's name in vain like that," Steve says firmly.

"See?" Munson smiles. It's like sunlight. "He gets it."

He plucks the baseball card from Rick's hand and holds it over his head when he tries to reach for it again. "See this little thing?" He says to Steve sweetly. "This guy costs six grand alone."

"Get out of town! Really?"

"Oh yeah, big guy. Selling the thing would give you a small fortune, and Rick over here is trying to con you out of it."

Steve frowns. "Is that true?" He asks Rick.

"Nothing but," Munson says in place of him. He slips the card back into Steve's hands and gives them a pat.

"The Hell is even keeping you here, Munson?" Rick sneers. "Did the gig you won't shut up about fall through like they usually do? Better to bum it out here than in your shithole apartment? Stop loitering in my damn store and make like a fucking tree. You're banned."

"Whatever helps you sleep at night," Munson says rolling his eyes. He looks at Steve, then the door, gesturing at it with a flick of his head. "I'll see you out, Beaver."

He walks them both out the door, stopping to gesture at Rick strangely--hands balled into fists with only his middle fingers up--before stepping outside onto the sidewalk.

"Well merci, Monsieur," Steve says appreciatively, because Dad taught him French was always to be used on such occasions.

"What, you're French?"

"Oh no, I'm"--he thinks back to what Dad told him if a mutant asks where he's from. Gosh, he thinks he's supposed to be--"out on business."

"And you don't even have a clue about the little business trick that Rick tried to pull?"

"No...no, I--"

"Yeah, doesn't matter." Munson shrugs. He smiles sympathetically at Steve before turning on his heel and walking off. Oh boy, what would he do without him?

He follows him like a lost puppy, that's what.

"...You going the same way?" Munson asks incredulously. Steve shakes his head.

"Well, I'm following you."

Munson stops in his tracks, blinking, and Steve almost runs into him in his state. "Me?"

"Well yes! Where are we going?"

"We?" Munson asserts. "I'm going back to my shithole apartment, and judging by that jacket you're wearing, you should be taking the next left and hop-skipping straight to the barber college."

"Oh, I'm lost, though."

"Aren't we all?"

"Say, did you just get banned from that hobby store because of me?" Steve says to change the subject.

Munson sighs. "Seems like I did, sailor. The place was shitty anyways, with that dickhead running the operation. Wayne could get better cards from a different joint."

...dickhead? Steve's never heard that leave the seams of anyone's lips before. "Dickhead?"

"Yeah, he's a real fucking loser. A walking talking penis capable of human speech."

Steve gets queasy at the image he's concocted in his head. He leans against the nearest brick wall, his suitcase tumbling to the ground as he drops into a contemplative squat.

"Dude, what is wrong with you?"

"Well, the mental image that I..."

Munson's eyebrows scrunch before he reaches out a hand to Steve. He takes it, letting the man haul him upward. "Look, man, where'd you park your car?"

"I came by bus."

"Aren't you full of surprises."

"I am?"

"Okay look." Eddie raises his hands, palms splayed in the air. "It's your first time in Los Angeles, right? Everyone wants a taste of it, I know, and you're out for business and fucking famished. You got the opportunity to see the great big world outside of your little bubble and you got excited--but you took a bus and got mixed up in the middle of San Fernando Valley without a clue in the world. Am I correct?"

Steve listens in wonderment. So far, Munson's been correct in a way. He's convinced he might be psychic. He nods slowly and seriously just to see Munson flash that lighting-strike smile.

"Great, great. Which brings us to here. Correct again?"

"Oh yeah."

"Where are you staying?"

Nowhere, at the moment. Steve opens his mouth to say so, but Munson interrupts quickly. "Holiday Inn?"

"Yes, the Holiday Inn!" Steve says totally truthfully.

"Okay, cool. Cool." Munson claps his hands together with finality and starts walking. "The nearest bus station is a couple of blocks away if you take a right--"

"Don't you have a car?"

Munson stops in his tracks again. He turns to face Steve once again. "What's your name, sweetheart?"

Something warm pools in Steve's gut at the pet name. Something about the way those pretty lips form that word sends blood rushing to his cheeks. "Steve," he says.

"Alright, Steve." Oh boy, his name sounds even better when Munson says it. "Rule number one in Los Angeles? Never let a stranger drive you anywhere."

"If it makes you feel any better," Steve says sweetly, "I don't have a gun."

Munson pales, then starts running.

"Hey!" Steve cries and makes haste to follow him. "I must've said something wrong, please forgive me!"

"Nope, nope--get the fuck away from me, man!"

He grabs Munson's wrist to pull him back, which is a bad move since the man starts writhing around in his grip. "I'm not going to hurt you, sir!"

Steve drops Munson's hand and raises his in surrender. "See?"

"...Just let me get to my car."

"I'll give you a Rogers Hornsby if you take me to my hotel," Steve reasons.

Munson stills. "...That's like four grand, don't bullshit me."

He pulls the card from his jacket and presents it as evidence. "See? I was holding it back." He wants Munson to feel safe. "I got two." He reaches for the other cards in his pockets and pulls them out. "And-and all these other ones, too!"

"Okay, okay. You'll give me four thousand dollars if I drive you to your place?"

"Uh-uh!"

"That's it?"

"Yep."

"And I don't have to give you a quickie in the backseat or anything?"

"Yes sir--wait, what?"

Munson blows past his question like it didn't even leave Steve's mouth. "Can you stop with the sir crap?"

"Well, I'm sorry, sir--"

"My name is Eddie."

Eddie...Eddie, Eddie, Eddie. Wow, what a name. It's almost like something he's heard on the television.

"Why, it's nice to meet you, Eddie."

"Tolerable to meet you too, Steve."

Steve smiles shyly, then asks, "So are you a girl?"

"Excuse me?"

"Well it's just your hair...it's so long." Steve points at his as an example. "I've never seen anything like it before."

"Dude, it's 1992, every other guy looks like this--have you been living under a rock or something?"

Something like that. Steve shrugs.

"Well guys having long hair doesn't mean that they're girls, Steve, that's a given. It's not 1962 anymore." Eddie backtracks. "Well, I mean, dudes can have long hair and be chicks and chicks can be dudes too but that's not--"

"Oh, wow, my dad told me about one of those the last time he went here!"

"Oh that's fantastic, sweetheart," Eddie says, sugary-sweet. "But how about I drive you home?"

"That'd be a pleasure, Eddie."

[airoasis]

SIDEMEN EXTREME DESERT RACE *EXPLOSION* | THE SIDEMEN SHOW

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SIDEMEN EXTREME DESERT RACE *EXPLOSION* | THE SIDEMEN SHOW

Oh shit! This season on the sidemen exhibit… – Aargh! – Oh! Aargh! I have been kidnapped by my evil twin sister. We’re gonna be doing a race. Is your title truely undergo? Oh my god! That you can run, however you can’t disguise, Sidemen! – Oh my god! – help! We have to get out of right here now! – Yeah, dudes. – Oh my god, it’s Steve-O! I’ve been followin’ you on YouTube and i am impressed with what you could have comprehensive. However now it’s time for you to step off the sidelines and kick some serious ass. I need you to join me right here in Morocco for a crash course in fitting a absolutely dominating motion hero.Hop on that jet, boys. I’ll see you in three hours. – Yeah! – Let’s go, then! Let’s get to the jet! – Josh, decide on up my passport. – Get your own passport! I received my shirt. Why do I must get the passports for? I’ll close the door as well, shall I? Yep, certain, satisfactory. – No, what are you doing? – Get in! Jesus, how lengthy does it take? When you consider that the dawn of time, there have always been sidemen, simply as there have consistently been plankton in the oceans, worms in the earth, gnats in the sky. Through the years, kings, queens, pharaohs and presidents have all challenged sidemen to get up, to be all they can be, to go away the shelter and step to the entrance. That forward jump has in no way transpired. Except now. We deliver you seven unique sidemen of our possess time, who are guys of motion, destiny and braveness. Men who dare to step into the sunshine. They will raced, chased, blown up, battered and bedraggled, through deserts and oceans, over mountains and cities with one purpose: to move to the entrance, to take middle-stage.This is The Sidemen show. Go on, boys! Oh my god, Harry, why? Harry, why? He’s actually correct on the high of the stairs. It’s Steve-O. Whats up. Come on, boys, let’s transfer. – Come on, Ethan. – I’ve acquired quick legs! Gentlemen, welcome to Morocco. I’m, of course, Steve-O, known for breaking bones and shoving things up my butt. So who higher to aid you guys become real motion heroes? – The Rock, mostly. – o.K., fair play! But you’re on a quest to grow to be motion heroes, and i am gonna make you appear badass doing it. I’ve devised three distinct challenges to support you experiment your motion hero talents. All action heroes are stealthy as . So for project one, you guys are gonna have to be trained learn how to combination in, to vanish.So, head on into the market and to find yourselves some disguises. I will be giving you instructions the whole time even as I watch from up right here. I will also comply with you. – Like a pedo. – You wager. Watch out! This is some cash, 500 dirhams. Now, get outta right here, guys. – No, Harry, Harry! – Jesus! ! Not that approach, you idiot. It is a short cut! I can land on my feet. I’m an motion hero, trust me. Merci, merci beaucoup. Talking French, you already know. You practice it, observe it. Splitting up, i like that. – that is not charmed, is it? – Snake… – The cobra was… – It used to be dancing. I do not really understand what i am looking for proper here. What would you put on to cover your self? I say we just duvet you in meat. How’s that gonna help any one? That’s gonna make extra people look at me. Nah. You’ll combination in. You’ll be able to appear like a cow. Now that is what i’m talkin’ about. This would be like an invisibility cloak.- Oh my goodness. – Now that works. Do you see how informal that was? You would pass as an ancient girl now. Excuse me. How a lot for this? One hundred dirhams. What, I do like it very much, so… There we go, that is for you. Recall, boys, to be an action hero you gotta have a catchphrase. You gotta be attractive… And a bunch of alternative stuff. – Wanna hear my catchphrase? – o.K., hit me. I do not feel I do. Disguise your spouse, I’ve got a knife! Okay, uh… – Come on, boys. – Let’s not go along with that. I suppose I’ve acquired something. All right, one down, two to move. – you did good. – What do we get? I have no idea, just something that helps you blend. Simply embrace the tradition. I’m now not gonna lie, I noticed a Burberry scarf again there and i used to be tempted. Oh boys, these are me. Appear at these. No way. High-quality shop. All i’m sayin’, Harry… Oh jeez, sure. That’s it, yeah. What is mean that? That one, we imply, like that, it can be comfortable. Oh, it can be just like the pubes! The left facet is irritated. I suppose it makes communicating a lot simpler. Are you joyful? Am i able to get the slippers down, please? Merci beaucoup. – that is goatskin. – Goatskin? They do not seem that comfortable. It’s like stepping on a goat! Yeah, i like ’em. How much for the goat creps? – they may be like 300 dirhams. – Whoa! – What about this? – That one, give me one hundred fifty.Oi, oi, oi, you’re no longer gonna consider this. – What? – found a girlfriend? Oh! Oi, is that knock-off Sidemen? So how a lot in total for both of these and the goat creps? – 500 for all. – 500? 70… – more, more. – more? – Yeah. – supply him that and we’ll take that back. – Ah… Yeah, yeah. – How about that? Now we have just outdone ourselves. We’ve received the whole thing. I think we have quite accomplished well. I am happy, look. Oi, J.J., are trying the catchphrase. Whats up, show me your penis! – No, let’s go. – okay, let’s go. We’re in a nasty position. We don’t appear like motion heroes in any respect. – I do. – i don’t feel actually you do. You look like a funds action hero.Oh wait, the place have I long past? I love it, Vik, you’re the ultimate chameleon. Just blending proper in. Now you see me, now you don’t. – exceptional work! – Steve-O, i’m nailing it, okay? Harry, the goat loafers are hot, but you need more. J.J., take this to an extra level. I suppose we ought to buy a carpet. That’s a carpet right there. Oh wow… How handy! – can i try it on? – Oh my god. The place did Harry go? No, we will see you. – I find it irresistible, let’s take it. – Yeah, we’ll take it. – I offer you 20 matters. – it can be not gonna work. Yeah? High-quality! Excellent! – Wow. – o.K., pleased days. – Let’s go. – Oh my god. Simon, why am i able to smell your mum? Oh, cos there may be a number of fish.All right, guys, watching just right. Guys! Guys, guys, guys… Oh that? Oh Jesus. What the hell is that? I am a farmer now. Are you able to simply provide an explanation for where you received it? It is too lengthy a story. Did you pay for it? Too long a narrative, Vik! – Ethan! – rapid, run! Go, go, run, run! Ethan, what have you accomplished? Why are we running? Cos there’s a loopy man chasing us! Nice work, boys. The Rock does not have shit on you. Guys, to make this a success, i want you to run in sluggish motion and make it appear cool. And consider to break a bunch of crap. Run, like a average human! Run! You understand how we have been pronouncing we have got to combination in? I’m going to let you know how we can blend in. – How? – i’m going to turn out to be carpet man! Just stop. A carpet? Fairly, a carpet? What do you mean? This can be a quality cover. – What’s this? – i’m carpet man. – Donkey? – Man just called you a donkey, fam! He does look like just a little of an ass.Go, go, go, go, go! Ethan, fool! Did you pay for that goat? It is a long story! Supply him again his bloody goat! – Guys, i am hungry. – relatively? – Let’s examine this situation out. – critically? Stinks of shit over there, dude. Well, it is meals. Ah… Snails. Simon, determine these out. Oh! Jesus! – Simon, you cretin! – Oh my…! The snails! Guys, I said the inspiration is to combination in, dudes. – What are you doing? – He threw snails at me. – Run, Run ! Boys, gotta go! See you at the essential market. Okay, Sidemen, you gave it your nice. Now meet me out there in your subsequent project. Steve-O stated go, get to the market. Go, go, go! What did you guys do? Sidemen, before we get began right here, who got here up with "show me your penis"? Quality work! That’s an motion hero catchphrase if I ever did hear one. Now for challenge two, fitting an action hero requires enjoying video games of threat and talent in colorful surroundings. So, gentlemen, welcome to slipper tagine. – is that this really a factor? – Yeah.It can be tagine, now not vagine, you hounds! O.K., this is the way you play. Yeah, you stand at the back of here, flick the slipper towards the tagines. Like this. Ah! Hopefully you can do higher than I did. O.K.. Land in the tagines and you’re safe. Pass over, you are royally screwed. Whoever wins is gonna get a ailing set of wheels. The two of you who don’t win will not. It can be gonna be a nasty day for the loser. Watch Vik be excellent at it. It’s in his blood. I do put on slippers at all times. – He does, virtually. – Whoa! Oh Jesus! Can i exploit these or do I have got to use these? – they may be too significant! – No! No! It can be obtained a better floor subject. No looker. That was once dog shit, Harry. No longer lookin’ good for you. – i am scared! – Let’s go, Ethan, you obtained this.You obtained just a little of a step, mate. He can not get it off his sock. Why’s he so far again? Oh no! – What used to be that? – terrible! My heart is racing, what the hell? Go on, Tobi. It up. – he’s gonna get it now. – Oh my god, sure. Oh the wind. – Yeah he obtained it within the wind. – Oh my god. – Oh my god. Oh! Now not bad. That is difficult. I’ve no longer performed this earlier than. Just get it to land in the tagines. Oh! Everyone but Harry and Ethan are on goal. O.K., J.J., should you land within the tagines, these two guys get screwed. When you do not land within the tagines, it can be a unexpected demise for who goes out. Let’s go. Oh my god, that is the most intense slipper throw of a lifetime.Guys, stop stressing me! – that is not in! – it is not in. That’s no longer in. – sure! Yes! – total fail. Which means unexpected loss of life. Subsequent circular, final round, each and every of you will flick one slipper. The closest to the center wins. Come on, Harry. Ooh. Ooh… He is out, he is out. J.J., you’re gonna must perform beautiful badly to no longer win. Oh no. I don’t wanna be with Ethan! Oh… Yes! Absolutely, without doubt… Oh hold on. It can be in. He’s the decide. Let him decide. Steve-O, i really like "Jackass". I don’t wanna be with Ethan. I watch all of your films. That one’s in! Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my Jesus… No! All right, Sidemen, for the final task, action heroes ought to be capable to drive any variety of vehicle.So we’re goin’ into the desolate tract. Winners, you can be drivin’ range Rovers with air con. Let’s go! You two lamentably will don’t have any air-con using a junk truck. It goes very slow. Now, let’s hit the barren region! Our subsequent challenge is at Camel Ridge. I am so joyful we’re all together. – it’s over for them. – goodbye, guys. – discontinue celebrating. – Hate my lifestyles.- Oh my… Fam! – What? There is like nothing in here! What do you imply, there may be nothing in right here? Shut up and get in the car, man. All jokes apart, this hurts. Does the window even open? Everything comes aside. What the hell is occurring? I’ve an inspiration that the window just would not open. Oh no. Oh no. Oh my god, no! No! There we go. The handbrake’s down. What is this? – Why is this in our auto? – – Ah… – Hee-hee! Ha-ha-ha! You simply gotta smile. – What are you watching at? – Sorry! I’m sorry! Provide me your bicycle! Supply me your bicycle! That is truely like one of the vital worst matters ever. – that’s no longer healthful, is it? – – , man! – this is so bad! God’s sake! I sure hope those boys are making do in that junk truck. I suppose they may be having the worst time, cos we’re sitting right here, air conditioned.Oh I forgot in regards to the air con! They will be sweatin’ their tits off. And they’re gonna be much more aggie. When they get there, it is gonna be a fireball of simply anger. What’s funny is that there’s a lot of room for them in here. Fam no, wait, wait… You’re gonna kill me, fam, huh? Come on, man. No, drive, pressure, power! Don’t park. Go! Oh my god, this guy on the bike continues following me. – what’s going on? – Yo fam, i would as an alternative be on a camel. It is a bit hot, you already know. Put that air conditioning on, cos we livin’ in luxurious, boys! The item is, you place Ethan and J.J. In a truck together. In literally a heated environment, rather literally. That is, yeah! There is no danger of them not arguing. We’re in Marrakesh, Marrakesh We’re in Marrakesh… Ha-ha! You are not able to simply try this. At least put the dangers on! Cannot be assed! – i am not… No… – We’re in Marrakesh… – stop! – We’re in Marrakesh! La, la, la, la, la… We’re in Marrakesh, Marrakesh, we’re in Marra… I am no longer wearing that factor at the same time you are singing that silly tune. That is the worst day of my existence. What’s probably the most action hero factor you have got ever completed? One time I jumped out of an aircraft without a parachute into the ocean. – That was lovely action hero. – that is some thing, i guess. Yeah. One more motion hero trait I possess is i am additionally equipped to staple my bollocks to just about anything.- and that is strong. – Yeah… Right through the historical ball bag. And what matters have your balls been stapled to over time? Probably just different elements of my body. – What? – Yeah. , man. I used to be surely simply thinking, this is form of annoying. You fully grasp we now have on no account met Steve-O before, and he is leading us right into a desolate tract. I kinda want I used to be J.J. Or Ethan now. Do you? Transfer! – The locals hate you. – move that vehicle! You simply up his day. Appear at my day, fam. Look at my day! That does not mean you ought to smash every body else’s. I am not gonna lie, I’ve got a fart so…- No, i beg, please. – Oh it already smells! Ha-ha! Fam, no, no. No, no! No, fam, are you severe? Oh i’m gonna be unwell. No, it can be long past. It’s gone. Fam, it is gone. Oh fam, it can be still there! It’s lingering! I hate you. I know, I want a poo. Ha-ha! I want a poo particularly desperately. Motion heroes pressure like maniacs, so perhaps perform a little erratic driving. Ah! Ok, all right, waaah! Oh hell! We close to took out a local! Wait, it’s coming the other way! Stop tryin’ to kill humans, Harry! You are an action hero, that does not imply you will have a license to kill, Harry! Oh my god. Harry close to ran any one over.Whoever’s riding almost ran anyone over. Bloody hell. See, you will have bought riding like an asshole flawlessly beneath manage, so i’m gonna go ahead and get out. What? I’m not that dangerous. And your assignment is, motion heroes love a just right vehicle chase, so head off the road to only be a reckless son of a bitch, and race the opposite boys in the range Rover. – am i able to no longer get out with you? – No. I failed to feel my driving was that bad. It was o.K.. It’s not that just right. Ha-ha! Alright, i am gonna examine on the opposite guys. – i’m going to see you at Camel Ridge. – See you, Steve. You, my riding’s satisfactory! Harry, honk if you’re attractive. – – – i’m an attractive driver. – That was once too rapid. So, Steve-O obtained out of our vehicle and he told us that he wishes us to do a kick-ass driving sequence. Ok, so what you thinking, a race? Something actual easy like we just go three kilometers, whoever will get to the tip of three kilometers first wins. I assume. I imply we’re profitable already, so… Three, two, one, go! Yeah, yeah, yeah, we’re successful! – Slower! – What do you imply…Aargh! You are breaking the wheel. – My horn does not work. – – Oh we’re back, we’re back. – i am now formally a Moroccan again. Wait, dangle on, i’m doing a left. – Over the hill. – No, no, no. What do you imply, no, no, no? It is excellent. It’s a brief reduce. Oh my god! Why are they going up there? Oh my god. Oh my god! – gradual down, gradual down! – No it is nice, it is best… Oh Jesus. We can most likely make it. If we head down. How are you very likely gonna go down there? Appear, they’re going. What? Good enough, you recognize what, i’m riding any further. I am driving. I am gonna take the typical route. Peace out, boys! Whoo! You trash action hero pieces of shit! Hold comin’, keep it comin’. – hold it comin’. – Are you certain? – keep it comin’. – dangle on… Boys, we are the best motion heroes, good achieved. I consider we’re just right now to move down. We’re good? Well, get in then. – Come on. – Let’s go. Power, pressure, you filthy boy! Go, go! We’re on the street, on the road… I simply farted. Ha-ha! – Oh fam! – Yeah, utterly smells. – wholly smells. – No! Oh my god! We are the winners, da, da, da, da, da… Surely, you understand how optimistic i am we have now gained? I suppose that, despite the fact that Vik was once driving correct now, we have won. You’re a madman, you are a madman. – No, let’s scan it. – What, pull up here? I do these variety of roads. That is my average habitat. Exhibit me what you received. Get in, get in. It can be still a bit of of a race. Get my seat put. Are you guys ready for somewhat of Moroccan roll? Vik, simply go. We’re still racing, Vik! We go right. I feel it can be a short reduce.My spidey senses are tingling. – Likin’ the % you are goin’. – where are they? You see ’em? No, I can’t see shit. Oh they may be there! Go, go, go! Vik, they’re there! – Eyes on the avenue ! O.K., now we’re in a real race. There is not any easy. There may be most effective rough! Oh my days! I’m absolutely shitting myself. – Go! – i am tryin’! I suppose we might have this. I do not want Steve-O shovin’ something up my ass! – Vik, there is a dip, gradual! – there may be a river.They’ve put a river in my street. Go, go, go! Them! You! Yes! Sure! Go watch it, they may be overtaking! – Why are you watching? – How have you made us lose? Sure! Oh my god. – I informed you I might do that. – Josh, i really like you! Come again, come again! Boys, come back right here, boys! – that is Vik’s fault. – all right, bitches? You lost! We took the brief reduce! Now you’re gonna get stuffed up your ass through Steve-O.Ha! Riding time’s up, Sidemen. Meet met at Camel Ridge in 1/2 an hour. If that you may make it in one piece. There is one thing we have not performed and it is title my goat. What’s a name for a goat? – I have no idea. Prick? – No, that is horrible. Seeing as we’re in Morocco, how about Abdullah? – i don’t care anymore. – it works! Is that a petrol station? It’s in the center of nowhere. Pull in, pull in, pull in. – Oh, right. – well… Seeing as you have got driven, i will do the courtesy of filling up. – thanks very a lot. – i’m stuck. Just chill out, chill out, loosen up. – door. – Come on. There we go. Ailing. Thank you. Right, you get snacks or some thing. – o.K.. – Abdullah, sit down tight.Do you communicate English? The article’s gonna fall aside. There are designated matters every motion hero desires to do. So it’s time for these boys to run in sluggish motion from an explosion. Can i have food… Free of charge? Well, my man’s given me free meals. – quite? – nontoxic, bro. We more commonly will have to pay for the petrol, though. Sweets? Me sweets. Alright, what’s fallacious with this dude? He does not.. Are you on medicines? My brothers, let’s see the way you manage this. Oh, yeah. Oh, my god. I must save Abdullah. No. No! J.J., it’s gonna blow! Oh my god, run! Oh, shit! Best, sluggish-mo run. Yeah, dudes. Ah, can this day get any worse? How we gonna get to Camel Ridge now? I acquired no clue. I blame Abdullah. – this is all Abdullah’s fault. – You can’t blame Abdullah now. Guys! Guys! I simply got a message from Steve-O. We gotta meet him at Camel Ridge, which is ten minutes down this avenue.Get your assholes spread, cheeks broad, and bring out the lube. Harry is the worst man or woman to lose to. He fairly is. Does putting stuff up your butt harm? No longer when you use sufficient lube… I do not suppose. That’s why I requested him. – Please stop, stop. – Please. Discontinue for us, stop for us. – yes. – discontinue for us. – will we… Can we’ve got a carry? – do we get in? – Take us to Camel Ridge? – we are able to go in? Hiya, this is Abdullah. – What’s up, guys? – i’m no longer used to this. – well, this is a factor. – Oh, goodness. I don’t know what’s worse, the goat or you. – is this it? – this is Camel Ridge. No signal of J.J. And Ethan, although. Oh, best of your mum to show up, Simon. You guys are like 100% getting stuff up your bum. – No, Vik is. – Yeah, we mentioned Vik’s gonna be the one.. We determined it’s his fault, so he’s gonna take three times it. That is now not cool. Hiya. Erm, why is he on the roof? Congratulations on the win, boys, however don’t worry about any punishment for the losers. Talking of losers. Good day, the boys! So there is handiest two losers today. Do not speak to me. Guys, it is time for me to get completely rad, and i wanna show that i am the perfect action hero.You see, what number of mild bulbs has The Rock broken together with his testicles? I’m about to jump off of this roof sideways and spread-eagled… …At expectantly the superb trajectory to match a row of 36 gentle bulbs with my balls. – Why 36? – Yeah! Considering the fact that. And with that, wish me and my balls a number of luck. Oh, no. Oh, no. – excellent good fortune! – He hasn’t got to do it, it’s exceptional. Harry made him jealous of The Rock. Harry, you’ve gotten completely scarred a man. One. Two.Three. Oh, my god! Oh, my god! – Oh, my balls. – Bro, you o.K.? You already know what? I do not want whatever to do with this. I am leavin’ boys, i am leavin’. Let’s jump. It wasn’t us, it used to be you! To the autos! Yo, dudes! I feel i’m just right. Gettin’ in. Seatbelts on! Bro this guy needs to get out of the way. Let’s go. That was once sweet, proper? Dudes? Oh, my goodness! You guys obtained fortunate with these, did not you? Wow! Man, how am I presupposed to get house? Sidemen, a real motion hero certainly not leaves a person in the field. Back to the shadows you go. Sidemen, I venture you to become a member of me within the mountains in a sequence of events towards me and my elite group of alpine gurus.Oh no, it can be us in opposition to them? This is utterly unfair. Yeah! Oh, Jesus! Oh! That was once a nasty notion! Aargh! I’m literally shitting bricks! Aargh! I am snowboarding! Who crashed? .

[batterymonster2021]

SIDEMEN EXTREME DESERT RACE *EXPLOSION* | THE SIDEMEN SHOW

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SIDEMEN EXTREME DESERT RACE *EXPLOSION* | THE SIDEMEN SHOW

Oh shit! This season on the sidemen exhibit… – Aargh! – Oh! Aargh! I have been kidnapped by my evil twin sister. We’re gonna be doing a race. Is your title truely undergo? Oh my god! That you can run, however you can’t disguise, Sidemen! – Oh my god! – help! We have to get out of right here now! – Yeah, dudes. – Oh my god, it’s Steve-O! I’ve been followin’ you on YouTube and i am impressed with what you could have comprehensive. However now it’s time for you to step off the sidelines and kick some serious ass. I need you to join me right here in Morocco for a crash course in fitting a absolutely dominating motion hero.Hop on that jet, boys. I’ll see you in three hours. – Yeah! – Let’s go, then! Let’s get to the jet! – Josh, decide on up my passport. – Get your own passport! I received my shirt. Why do I must get the passports for? I’ll close the door as well, shall I? Yep, certain, satisfactory. – No, what are you doing? – Get in! Jesus, how lengthy does it take? When you consider that the dawn of time, there have always been sidemen, simply as there have consistently been plankton in the oceans, worms in the earth, gnats in the sky. Through the years, kings, queens, pharaohs and presidents have all challenged sidemen to get up, to be all they can be, to go away the shelter and step to the entrance. That forward jump has in no way transpired. Except now. We deliver you seven unique sidemen of our possess time, who are guys of motion, destiny and braveness. Men who dare to step into the sunshine. They will raced, chased, blown up, battered and bedraggled, through deserts and oceans, over mountains and cities with one purpose: to move to the entrance, to take middle-stage.This is The Sidemen show. Go on, boys! Oh my god, Harry, why? Harry, why? He’s actually correct on the high of the stairs. It’s Steve-O. Whats up. Come on, boys, let’s transfer. – Come on, Ethan. – I’ve acquired quick legs! Gentlemen, welcome to Morocco. I’m, of course, Steve-O, known for breaking bones and shoving things up my butt. So who higher to aid you guys become real motion heroes? – The Rock, mostly. – o.K., fair play! But you’re on a quest to grow to be motion heroes, and i am gonna make you appear badass doing it. I’ve devised three distinct challenges to support you experiment your motion hero talents. All action heroes are stealthy as . So for project one, you guys are gonna have to be trained learn how to combination in, to vanish.So, head on into the market and to find yourselves some disguises. I will be giving you instructions the whole time even as I watch from up right here. I will also comply with you. – Like a pedo. – You wager. Watch out! This is some cash, 500 dirhams. Now, get outta right here, guys. – No, Harry, Harry! – Jesus! ! Not that approach, you idiot. It is a short cut! I can land on my feet. I’m an motion hero, trust me. Merci, merci beaucoup. Talking French, you already know. You practice it, observe it. Splitting up, i like that. – that is not charmed, is it? – Snake… – The cobra was… – It used to be dancing. I do not really understand what i am looking for proper here. What would you put on to cover your self? I say we just duvet you in meat. How’s that gonna help any one? That’s gonna make extra people look at me. Nah. You’ll combination in. You’ll be able to appear like a cow. Now that is what i’m talkin’ about. This would be like an invisibility cloak.- Oh my goodness. – Now that works. Do you see how informal that was? You would pass as an ancient girl now. Excuse me. How a lot for this? One hundred dirhams. What, I do like it very much, so… There we go, that is for you. Recall, boys, to be an action hero you gotta have a catchphrase. You gotta be attractive… And a bunch of alternative stuff. – Wanna hear my catchphrase? – o.K., hit me. I do not feel I do. Disguise your spouse, I’ve got a knife! Okay, uh… – Come on, boys. – Let’s not go along with that. I suppose I’ve acquired something. All right, one down, two to move. – you did good. – What do we get? I have no idea, just something that helps you blend. Simply embrace the tradition. I’m now not gonna lie, I noticed a Burberry scarf again there and i used to be tempted. Oh boys, these are me. Appear at these. No way. High-quality shop. All i’m sayin’, Harry… Oh jeez, sure. That’s it, yeah. What is mean that? That one, we imply, like that, it can be comfortable. Oh, it can be just like the pubes! The left facet is irritated. I suppose it makes communicating a lot simpler. Are you joyful? Am i able to get the slippers down, please? Merci beaucoup. – that is goatskin. – Goatskin? They do not seem that comfortable. It’s like stepping on a goat! Yeah, i like ’em. How much for the goat creps? – they may be like 300 dirhams. – Whoa! – What about this? – That one, give me one hundred fifty.Oi, oi, oi, you’re no longer gonna consider this. – What? – found a girlfriend? Oh! Oi, is that knock-off Sidemen? So how a lot in total for both of these and the goat creps? – 500 for all. – 500? 70… – more, more. – more? – Yeah. – supply him that and we’ll take that back. – Ah… Yeah, yeah. – How about that? Now we have just outdone ourselves. We’ve received the whole thing. I think we have quite accomplished well. I am happy, look. Oi, J.J., are trying the catchphrase. Whats up, show me your penis! – No, let’s go. – okay, let’s go. We’re in a nasty position. We don’t appear like motion heroes in any respect. – I do. – i don’t feel actually you do. You look like a funds action hero.Oh wait, the place have I long past? I love it, Vik, you’re the ultimate chameleon. Just blending proper in. Now you see me, now you don’t. – exceptional work! – Steve-O, i’m nailing it, okay? Harry, the goat loafers are hot, but you need more. J.J., take this to an extra level. I suppose we ought to buy a carpet. That’s a carpet right there. Oh wow… How handy! – can i try it on? – Oh my god. The place did Harry go? No, we will see you. – I find it irresistible, let’s take it. – Yeah, we’ll take it. – I offer you 20 matters. – it can be not gonna work. Yeah? High-quality! Excellent! – Wow. – o.K., pleased days. – Let’s go. – Oh my god. Simon, why am i able to smell your mum? Oh, cos there may be a number of fish.All right, guys, watching just right. Guys! Guys, guys, guys… Oh that? Oh Jesus. What the hell is that? I am a farmer now. Are you able to simply provide an explanation for where you received it? It is too lengthy a story. Did you pay for it? Too long a narrative, Vik! – Ethan! – rapid, run! Go, go, run, run! Ethan, what have you accomplished? Why are we running? Cos there’s a loopy man chasing us! Nice work, boys. The Rock does not have shit on you. Guys, to make this a success, i want you to run in sluggish motion and make it appear cool. And consider to break a bunch of crap. Run, like a average human! Run! You understand how we have been pronouncing we have got to combination in? I’m going to let you know how we can blend in. – How? – i’m going to turn out to be carpet man! Just stop. A carpet? Fairly, a carpet? What do you mean? This can be a quality cover. – What’s this? – i’m carpet man. – Donkey? – Man just called you a donkey, fam! He does look like just a little of an ass.Go, go, go, go, go! Ethan, fool! Did you pay for that goat? It is a long story! Supply him again his bloody goat! – Guys, i am hungry. – relatively? – Let’s examine this situation out. – critically? Stinks of shit over there, dude. Well, it is meals. Ah… Snails. Simon, determine these out. Oh! Jesus! – Simon, you cretin! – Oh my…! The snails! Guys, I said the inspiration is to combination in, dudes. – What are you doing? – He threw snails at me. – Run, Run ! Boys, gotta go! See you at the essential market. Okay, Sidemen, you gave it your nice. Now meet me out there in your subsequent project. Steve-O stated go, get to the market. Go, go, go! What did you guys do? Sidemen, before we get began right here, who got here up with "show me your penis"? Quality work! That’s an motion hero catchphrase if I ever did hear one. Now for challenge two, fitting an action hero requires enjoying video games of threat and talent in colorful surroundings. So, gentlemen, welcome to slipper tagine. – is that this really a factor? – Yeah.It can be tagine, now not vagine, you hounds! O.K., this is the way you play. Yeah, you stand at the back of here, flick the slipper towards the tagines. Like this. Ah! Hopefully you can do higher than I did. O.K.. Land in the tagines and you’re safe. Pass over, you are royally screwed. Whoever wins is gonna get a ailing set of wheels. The two of you who don’t win will not. It can be gonna be a nasty day for the loser. Watch Vik be excellent at it. It’s in his blood. I do put on slippers at all times. – He does, virtually. – Whoa! Oh Jesus! Can i exploit these or do I have got to use these? – they may be too significant! – No! No! It can be obtained a better floor subject. No looker. That was once dog shit, Harry. No longer lookin’ good for you. – i am scared! – Let’s go, Ethan, you obtained this.You obtained just a little of a step, mate. He can not get it off his sock. Why’s he so far again? Oh no! – What used to be that? – terrible! My heart is racing, what the hell? Go on, Tobi. It up. – he’s gonna get it now. – Oh my god, sure. Oh the wind. – Yeah he obtained it within the wind. – Oh my god. – Oh my god. Oh! Now not bad. That is difficult. I’ve no longer performed this earlier than. Just get it to land in the tagines. Oh! Everyone but Harry and Ethan are on goal. O.K., J.J., should you land within the tagines, these two guys get screwed. When you do not land within the tagines, it can be a unexpected demise for who goes out. Let’s go. Oh my god, that is the most intense slipper throw of a lifetime.Guys, stop stressing me! – that is not in! – it is not in. That’s no longer in. – sure! Yes! – total fail. Which means unexpected loss of life. Subsequent circular, final round, each and every of you will flick one slipper. The closest to the center wins. Come on, Harry. Ooh. Ooh… He is out, he is out. J.J., you’re gonna must perform beautiful badly to no longer win. Oh no. I don’t wanna be with Ethan! Oh… Yes! Absolutely, without doubt… Oh hold on. It can be in. He’s the decide. Let him decide. Steve-O, i really like "Jackass". I don’t wanna be with Ethan. I watch all of your films. That one’s in! Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my Jesus… No! All right, Sidemen, for the final task, action heroes ought to be capable to drive any variety of vehicle.So we’re goin’ into the desolate tract. Winners, you can be drivin’ range Rovers with air con. Let’s go! You two lamentably will don’t have any air-con using a junk truck. It goes very slow. Now, let’s hit the barren region! Our subsequent challenge is at Camel Ridge. I am so joyful we’re all together. – it’s over for them. – goodbye, guys. – discontinue celebrating. – Hate my lifestyles.- Oh my… Fam! – What? There is like nothing in here! What do you imply, there may be nothing in right here? Shut up and get in the car, man. All jokes apart, this hurts. Does the window even open? Everything comes aside. What the hell is occurring? I’ve an inspiration that the window just would not open. Oh no. Oh no. Oh my god, no! No! There we go. The handbrake’s down. What is this? – Why is this in our auto? – – Ah… – Hee-hee! Ha-ha-ha! You simply gotta smile. – What are you watching at? – Sorry! I’m sorry! Provide me your bicycle! Supply me your bicycle! That is truely like one of the vital worst matters ever. – that’s no longer healthful, is it? – – , man! – this is so bad! God’s sake! I sure hope those boys are making do in that junk truck. I suppose they may be having the worst time, cos we’re sitting right here, air conditioned.Oh I forgot in regards to the air con! They will be sweatin’ their tits off. And they’re gonna be much more aggie. When they get there, it is gonna be a fireball of simply anger. What’s funny is that there’s a lot of room for them in here. Fam no, wait, wait… You’re gonna kill me, fam, huh? Come on, man. No, drive, pressure, power! Don’t park. Go! Oh my god, this guy on the bike continues following me. – what’s going on? – Yo fam, i would as an alternative be on a camel. It is a bit hot, you already know. Put that air conditioning on, cos we livin’ in luxurious, boys! The item is, you place Ethan and J.J. In a truck together. In literally a heated environment, rather literally. That is, yeah! There is no danger of them not arguing. We’re in Marrakesh, Marrakesh We’re in Marrakesh… Ha-ha! You are not able to simply try this. At least put the dangers on! Cannot be assed! – i am not… No… – We’re in Marrakesh… – stop! – We’re in Marrakesh! La, la, la, la, la… We’re in Marrakesh, Marrakesh, we’re in Marra… I am no longer wearing that factor at the same time you are singing that silly tune. That is the worst day of my existence. What’s probably the most action hero factor you have got ever completed? One time I jumped out of an aircraft without a parachute into the ocean. – That was lovely action hero. – that is some thing, i guess. Yeah. One more motion hero trait I possess is i am additionally equipped to staple my bollocks to just about anything.- and that is strong. – Yeah… Right through the historical ball bag. And what matters have your balls been stapled to over time? Probably just different elements of my body. – What? – Yeah. , man. I used to be surely simply thinking, this is form of annoying. You fully grasp we now have on no account met Steve-O before, and he is leading us right into a desolate tract. I kinda want I used to be J.J. Or Ethan now. Do you? Transfer! – The locals hate you. – move that vehicle! You simply up his day. Appear at my day, fam. Look at my day! That does not mean you ought to smash every body else’s. I am not gonna lie, I’ve got a fart so…- No, i beg, please. – Oh it already smells! Ha-ha! Fam, no, no. No, no! No, fam, are you severe? Oh i’m gonna be unwell. No, it can be long past. It’s gone. Fam, it is gone. Oh fam, it can be still there! It’s lingering! I hate you. I know, I want a poo. Ha-ha! I want a poo particularly desperately. Motion heroes pressure like maniacs, so perhaps perform a little erratic driving. Ah! Ok, all right, waaah! Oh hell! We close to took out a local! Wait, it’s coming the other way! Stop tryin’ to kill humans, Harry! You are an action hero, that does not imply you will have a license to kill, Harry! Oh my god. Harry close to ran any one over.Whoever’s riding almost ran anyone over. Bloody hell. See, you will have bought riding like an asshole flawlessly beneath manage, so i’m gonna go ahead and get out. What? I’m not that dangerous. And your assignment is, motion heroes love a just right vehicle chase, so head off the road to only be a reckless son of a bitch, and race the opposite boys in the range Rover. – am i able to no longer get out with you? – No. I failed to feel my driving was that bad. It was o.K.. It’s not that just right. Ha-ha! Alright, i am gonna examine on the opposite guys. – i’m going to see you at Camel Ridge. – See you, Steve. You, my riding’s satisfactory! Harry, honk if you’re attractive. – – – i’m an attractive driver. – That was once too rapid. So, Steve-O obtained out of our vehicle and he told us that he wishes us to do a kick-ass driving sequence. Ok, so what you thinking, a race? Something actual easy like we just go three kilometers, whoever will get to the tip of three kilometers first wins. I assume. I imply we’re profitable already, so… Three, two, one, go! Yeah, yeah, yeah, we’re successful! – Slower! – What do you imply…Aargh! You are breaking the wheel. – My horn does not work. – – Oh we’re back, we’re back. – i am now formally a Moroccan again. Wait, dangle on, i’m doing a left. – Over the hill. – No, no, no. What do you imply, no, no, no? It is excellent. It’s a brief reduce. Oh my god! Why are they going up there? Oh my god. Oh my god! – gradual down, gradual down! – No it is nice, it is best… Oh Jesus. We can most likely make it. If we head down. How are you very likely gonna go down there? Appear, they’re going. What? Good enough, you recognize what, i’m riding any further. I am driving. I am gonna take the typical route. Peace out, boys! Whoo! You trash action hero pieces of shit! Hold comin’, keep it comin’. – hold it comin’. – Are you certain? – keep it comin’. – dangle on… Boys, we are the best motion heroes, good achieved. I consider we’re just right now to move down. We’re good? Well, get in then. – Come on. – Let’s go. Power, pressure, you filthy boy! Go, go! We’re on the street, on the road… I simply farted. Ha-ha! – Oh fam! – Yeah, utterly smells. – wholly smells. – No! Oh my god! We are the winners, da, da, da, da, da… Surely, you understand how optimistic i am we have now gained? I suppose that, despite the fact that Vik was once driving correct now, we have won. You’re a madman, you are a madman. – No, let’s scan it. – What, pull up here? I do these variety of roads. That is my average habitat. Exhibit me what you received. Get in, get in. It can be still a bit of of a race. Get my seat put. Are you guys ready for somewhat of Moroccan roll? Vik, simply go. We’re still racing, Vik! We go right. I feel it can be a short reduce.My spidey senses are tingling. – Likin’ the % you are goin’. – where are they? You see ’em? No, I can’t see shit. Oh they may be there! Go, go, go! Vik, they’re there! – Eyes on the avenue ! O.K., now we’re in a real race. There is not any easy. There may be most effective rough! Oh my days! I’m absolutely shitting myself. – Go! – i am tryin’! I suppose we might have this. I do not want Steve-O shovin’ something up my ass! – Vik, there is a dip, gradual! – there may be a river.They’ve put a river in my street. Go, go, go! Them! You! Yes! Sure! Go watch it, they may be overtaking! – Why are you watching? – How have you made us lose? Sure! Oh my god. – I informed you I might do that. – Josh, i really like you! Come again, come again! Boys, come back right here, boys! – that is Vik’s fault. – all right, bitches? You lost! We took the brief reduce! Now you’re gonna get stuffed up your ass through Steve-O.Ha! Riding time’s up, Sidemen. Meet met at Camel Ridge in 1/2 an hour. If that you may make it in one piece. There is one thing we have not performed and it is title my goat. What’s a name for a goat? – I have no idea. Prick? – No, that is horrible. Seeing as we’re in Morocco, how about Abdullah? – i don’t care anymore. – it works! Is that a petrol station? It’s in the center of nowhere. Pull in, pull in, pull in. – Oh, right. – well… Seeing as you have got driven, i will do the courtesy of filling up. – thanks very a lot. – i’m stuck. Just chill out, chill out, loosen up. – door. – Come on. There we go. Ailing. Thank you. Right, you get snacks or some thing. – o.K.. – Abdullah, sit down tight.Do you communicate English? The article’s gonna fall aside. There are designated matters every motion hero desires to do. So it’s time for these boys to run in sluggish motion from an explosion. Can i have food… Free of charge? Well, my man’s given me free meals. – quite? – nontoxic, bro. We more commonly will have to pay for the petrol, though. Sweets? Me sweets. Alright, what’s fallacious with this dude? He does not.. Are you on medicines? My brothers, let’s see the way you manage this. Oh, yeah. Oh, my god. I must save Abdullah. No. No! J.J., it’s gonna blow! Oh my god, run! Oh, shit! Best, sluggish-mo run. Yeah, dudes. Ah, can this day get any worse? How we gonna get to Camel Ridge now? I acquired no clue. I blame Abdullah. – this is all Abdullah’s fault. – You can’t blame Abdullah now. Guys! Guys! I simply got a message from Steve-O. We gotta meet him at Camel Ridge, which is ten minutes down this avenue.Get your assholes spread, cheeks broad, and bring out the lube. Harry is the worst man or woman to lose to. He fairly is. Does putting stuff up your butt harm? No longer when you use sufficient lube… I do not suppose. That’s why I requested him. – Please stop, stop. – Please. Discontinue for us, stop for us. – yes. – discontinue for us. – will we… Can we’ve got a carry? – do we get in? – Take us to Camel Ridge? – we are able to go in? Hiya, this is Abdullah. – What’s up, guys? – i’m no longer used to this. – well, this is a factor. – Oh, goodness. I don’t know what’s worse, the goat or you. – is this it? – this is Camel Ridge. No signal of J.J. And Ethan, although. Oh, best of your mum to show up, Simon. You guys are like 100% getting stuff up your bum. – No, Vik is. – Yeah, we mentioned Vik’s gonna be the one.. We determined it’s his fault, so he’s gonna take three times it. That is now not cool. Hiya. Erm, why is he on the roof? Congratulations on the win, boys, however don’t worry about any punishment for the losers. Talking of losers. Good day, the boys! So there is handiest two losers today. Do not speak to me. Guys, it is time for me to get completely rad, and i wanna show that i am the perfect action hero.You see, what number of mild bulbs has The Rock broken together with his testicles? I’m about to jump off of this roof sideways and spread-eagled… …At expectantly the superb trajectory to match a row of 36 gentle bulbs with my balls. – Why 36? – Yeah! Considering the fact that. And with that, wish me and my balls a number of luck. Oh, no. Oh, no. – excellent good fortune! – He hasn’t got to do it, it’s exceptional. Harry made him jealous of The Rock. Harry, you’ve gotten completely scarred a man. One. Two.Three. Oh, my god! Oh, my god! – Oh, my balls. – Bro, you o.K.? You already know what? I do not want whatever to do with this. I am leavin’ boys, i am leavin’. Let’s jump. It wasn’t us, it used to be you! To the autos! Yo, dudes! I feel i’m just right. Gettin’ in. Seatbelts on! Bro this guy needs to get out of the way. Let’s go. That was once sweet, proper? Dudes? Oh, my goodness! You guys obtained fortunate with these, did not you? Wow! Man, how am I presupposed to get house? Sidemen, a real motion hero certainly not leaves a person in the field. Back to the shadows you go. Sidemen, I venture you to become a member of me within the mountains in a sequence of events towards me and my elite group of alpine gurus.Oh no, it can be us in opposition to them? This is utterly unfair. Yeah! Oh, Jesus! Oh! That was once a nasty notion! Aargh! I’m literally shitting bricks! Aargh! I am snowboarding! Who crashed? .

[ohnotoomanyfandoms]

percabeth + watching a superhero movie

I give you… Percy, Annabeth, Piper, Jason, and Leo.

(send me fic prompts!) 

It’s been a long time since the last time Percy andJason fought like this. Like, really fought.

“Do you really want to punch your way out ofthis?”

“Sometimes Iwant to punch you in those perfect teeth.”

“I was wrongabout you. The whole world was wrong about you.”

Jason slammed his fist into his chair. “How can he beso irresponsible?”

Percy averted his gaze from the screen to look at hisfriend. “Irresponsible? He’s being a good friend, is all.”

“Maybe he is, to one person, but what about the restof the world that he’s endangering?”

Percy took a longer time before answering this time.“But,” he opened his mouth, then closed it again, as if looking for the rightwords. “You don’t understand… Bucky – he’s his friend.”

“Yes, but he’s also a wanted criminal. He’sdangerous.”

“He’s been brainwashed!” Percy shouts, a little tooloud, before he noticed Annabeth moving up from her chair to grab the remote.She paused the film.

“Look, bro, I get it. It’s very tragic that Bucky wastaken by Hydra and made into a monster –“

“Monster?”Percy echoed, in disbelief. “Did you just see the scene where he went aroundbuying plums? Would a monster smile that little smile? Would a monster thankthe vendor?”

“Percy, I think that’s a little beside the point,man.”

“What’s the point then?” he asked, a little defensiveand a little irritated.

“The point is that Captain America here is endangeringthe entire world to protect a guy he knew once. And in doing so, he is goingrogue.”

“Rogue?” Percy’s eyes widened. He’s Captain America…he’s a hero.”

“Who refused to sign the Sokovia Accords.” Jasonlooked unimpressed.

“This is interesting,” Piper observed from her seat betweenJason and the couch.

“Looks like we’re about to have to deal with a civilwar of our own,” Annabeth said, resuming her place on the couch next to Percy.  

“It’s not some guy! It’s Bucky, his pal!”

“He ships them,” Piper said.

“What?” Percy asked, confused.

“Oh, he does,” Annabeth agreed.

Ignoring the girls’ comments, Percy went on. “Steveand Bucky have known each other since they were children, they’re like … like–“

“Thalia and me,” Annabeth supplied.

“Yes! Thank you, Annabeth.” He paused for a second tosmile at her. “How could you expect one to give up on the other?”

Jason crossed his arms. “He is Captain America, hecan’t just go rogue! Even superheroes have to answer to someone.”

“Funny. I’m seeing Jason Grace, young Steve Rogerslookalike, but I’m hearing Tony Stark,” Piper chimed in.

“Because Stark is right. Cap’s actions are justproving Stark right, when he says they need the registration act. Back me up,Pipes.”

“Nope, sorry. Can’t do. I’m with Percy on this. TeamCap for the win.”

“Wow, thanks for the support there, love. Annabeth?”he asked, hopeful.

She shook her head. “The registration act obstructsthe right of every citizen to liberty and privacy. It’s morally wrong.”

“You guys are just saying these things because youlike Cap better. But what would you do, if you were in the situation of –“

Percy cut him off. “I would, one hundred percent, savemy friend. Screw the government.”

Annabeth looked at her boyfriend and he looked back,and he knew she was remembering the words that her mother had spoken to him solong ago. Your fatal flaw is personalloyalty, Percy.

“Are you sure you would?” Jason asked, bewildered.

You do notknow when it is time to cut your losses.

Percy’s answer came hard and sure. “I would stand withmy friend.”

To save afriend, you would sacrifice the world.

“So you would pick one person over the world…?”

“He has,” Piper said. “When he fell into Tartarus.That was not bravery. That was loyalty.” She paused to look at Annabeth. “Itwas, excuse the cliché, love. He refused to let Annabeth fall alone, so he fellwith her, even if he knew he was jeopardizing the balance of the quest and the fateof the entire world.”

They were silent for a couple of seconds, and when itwas clear none of them had anything to add on the matter, Annabeth pressed theplay button and took Percy’s hand as they resumed watching the film.  

It was not long until they had to pause again.

“What’s going on here? Is there an event taking placethat I haven’t been invited to?”

“Yes, Leo, it’s called a double date.”

“I see. My feelings are hurt nonetheless.” He pausedto be his dramatic self. “And what activities did this surely sad Leo-less dateinclude, before I graced you with my presence?”

“We were watching Civil War, but Jason and Percythought it was best to start one,” Piper said.

“Without me?” asked Leo. “Grace, I thought you knewyou could always count on me to be your sidekick.”

“Thanks man,” Jason said. “I could use some help.These three,” he gestured to Piper, Percy and Annabeth, “Are teaming up againstme.”

“You too, Beauty Queen? Betrayal!” Leo shouted as hemade his way into the room and moved to sit between Jason and Piper on thecouch.

“By all means, suit yourself, Valdez.”

“Yup,” the latter said, pretending not to note thesarcasm in Percy’s voice.

“It’s not like you’re crushing our date…” Piper said.

“Doubledate.” Leo corrected. “Which turned into a civil war. Your words, not mine.” Heheld up his hands.

“Still, I wanted to cuddle,” Piper confessed.

“We are on different teams and you want to cuddle?!”Jason exclaimed, pretending outrage, at the same time that Leo said “We canstill cuddle like this, you know…”

Annabeth stayed silent for the rest of the film,wrapped in Percy’s arms. It was unusual for her not to speak up and makecomments. She was also the first to start talking when the end credits startedrolling, but she didn’t. True, they were waiting for the post credits scene,but since she didn’t look like she would start talking soon, Jason did.

“Who’s your favorite, Annabeth?” Jason asked, as shewas the only one who hadn’t declared it during the movie.

“Not that there’s much choice for us girls,” Pipermuttered, and the daughter of Athena nodded.

“It’s Black Widow,” Percy said absent-mindedly, thenturned to see his girlfriend grinning knowingly at him.

“I thought spiders frightened you,” Jason said matterof factly.  

“Well,” Annabeth finally smirked. “What doesn’t killyou makes you stronger.”